• Member Since 24th Dec, 2013
  • offline last seen Aug 18th, 2014

Jake the Dog


They told me a could be anything I wanted. So I became a potato.

More Blog Posts8

  • 561 weeks
    Thanks to everyone.

    I'm done being a part of this cult.
    Thanks to everyone here who made my stay worthwhile. Too many to name ;)

    68 comments · 715 views
  • 567 weeks
    CONSPIRACY THEORY: BARACK OBAMA IS ACTUALLY OSAMA BIN LADEN (OR VICE VERSA)

    AN ANONYMOUS TIP HAS BROUGHT TO MY ATTENTION BARACK OBAMA, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES, MIGHT ACTUALLY BE OSAMA BIN LADEN. YOU KNOW, THE GUY THAT FLEW A COUPLE PLANES INTO A FEW BUILDINGS IN MANHATTAN ALL THOSE YEARS AGO.
    LET'S LOOK AT THE FIRST PIECE OF EVIDENCE.

    Read More

    38 comments · 10,686 views
  • 567 weeks
    CONSPIRACY THEORY: VLADIMIR PUTIN IS A TIME TRAVELER

    GUYS. I JUST FOUND SOMETHING OUT. VLADIMIR PUTIN, THE GUY THAT RUNS RUSSIA, IS A TIME TRAVELER. ALL THE EVIDENCE POINTS TO IT.
    LOOKY HERE.
    ALRIGHT.

    HERE IS PUTIN AT A MARATHON IN 1967. HE IS PUSHING THE FIRST FEMALE RUNNER OUT OF THE WAY. AS YOU CAN SEE, IT HAS A RESEMBLENCE.

    Read More

    60 comments · 3,142 views
  • 567 weeks
    "u pedofile feggit bronie!!1!"

    So today I got called a pedophile.
    Twice.
    For watching a television show.

    Associating love of a cartoon with pedophilia - classy. Next thing you know people that dress up as Transformers or have the toys/collectibles have a robot sex fetish right? It's called a straw-man argument combined with an ad homineim attack.

    Read More

    13 comments · 531 views
  • 571 weeks
    Some people are stupid

    Today a girl told me she was in the "Belieber" fandom.
    What the f...?
    Belieber isn't a fandom.
    I like the Beatles. Does that make me part of Sgt. Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band?
    No. It makes me a fan of the Beatles.

    Doctor Who
    Harry Potter
    My Little Pony
    Furries
    Trekkies
    Hunger Games
    Lord of the Rings
    Star Wars
    Game of Thrones (Thronies?)
    Breaking Bad
    TWD

    Read More

    70 comments · 678 views
Jul
5th
2014

CONSPIRACY THEORY: BARACK OBAMA IS ACTUALLY OSAMA BIN LADEN (OR VICE VERSA) · 11:14am Jul 5th, 2014

AN ANONYMOUS TIP HAS BROUGHT TO MY ATTENTION BARACK OBAMA, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES, MIGHT ACTUALLY BE OSAMA BIN LADEN. YOU KNOW, THE GUY THAT FLEW A COUPLE PLANES INTO A FEW BUILDINGS IN MANHATTAN ALL THOSE YEARS AGO.
LET'S LOOK AT THE FIRST PIECE OF EVIDENCE.
YOU CAN SEE HERE THAT OBAMA AND OSAMA'S HANDS ARE IN THE EXACT SAME POSITION. AND THEY'RE BOTH TALKING ABOUT POLITICS. WHY WOULD THEY BE TALKING ABOUT POLITICS? THEY ARE THE SAME PERSON.


SAME PERSON.

LOOK HERE. PAY ATTENTION TO OBAMA AND OSAMA'S HAND AND FACIAL EXPRESSIONS.
SEE SOMETHING FAMILIAR? OF COURSE YOU DO.


SAME PERSON.

NOW HERE IS THE MOST DAMNING PIECE OF EVIDENCE. LOOKY HERE.


JUST LOOK AT THIS! IT LOOKS THE SAME, DUNNIT? OF COURSE IT DOES! OBAMA AND OSAMA ARE THE SAME EXACT PERSON! I'M TELLING YOU. THIS IS REAL. I DON'T KNOW IF THIS SHOULD BE CALLED A CONSPIRACY THEORY OR NOT. BUT IT SURE SOUNDS LIKE ONE. TOO BAD. IT ISN'T.
THIS.
IS.
REAL!

OH, AND IF YOU CROSS YOUR EYES AT OSAMA BIN LADEN IT KINDA LOOKS LIKE OBAMA BIDEN.

- JAKE THE DOG
YOUR LOCAL CONSPIRACY THEORIST

Report Jake the Dog · 10,686 views ·
Comments ( 38 )

Well, I don't know... I thought he was dead :unsuresweetie:

2259453 IT'S A COVER UP MAN.

2259454 Any more proof that I can analyze?

2259457 The comment below you.

2259458 Did you create that account?

2259460 I don't know... I need more evidence to analyse.

2259461 I don't have any more evidence 3:

2259463 CONSPPPPIIRRRACCCCYYYY

2259464 THE EVIDENCE IS ALL HERE. RUN WHILE YOU STILL CAN

2259466 THE EARS ARE THE EXACT SAME!!!!111!!!!! :pinkiegasp:

2259468 Say, That beard looks fake? :unsuresweetie:

2259470 YOU'RE RIGHT
AND THAT SUNTAN LOOKS FAKE

2259470 THE MARKING ON THE INSIDE OF HIS HANDS ARE EXACTLY THE SAME

2259474 BETTER TO MOLEST YOU WITH

2259475 Those names sounds similar

2259477 The Same Teeth, Same Eyes :pinkiegasp: YOUR %100 RIGHT!!!!

2259480 TAKE ACTION WHILE YOU CAN
RUUUUUUNNNN

2259488 I'm analyzing more theories

2259490 Tell me if you find anything :D

Osama also apparently owned a Cheese Shop in Brooklyn or somethin... CHEESE IS THE KEY TO EVERYTHING

2260780 OSAMA LIKED CHEESE

2261144 Does um... OBAMA SLIGHTLY LIKED CHEESE! EVERYTHING IS TRUE!

2262348 HE ALSO LIKED PANCAKES

2263199 OSAMA RAN A PANCAKE HOUSE IN IRAN

What the hell Jake, what the hell.

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