Help Me, And Win A Free Commission · 10:06pm Dec 11th, 2013
Thanks to Chris, I've been thinking about writing style recently. What is a style? Do I have one? Do I have more than one? How can I tell? “Thinking really hard about these questions” doesn't seem like a good way to get answers, since my most common problem as a writer is that I don't communicate the ideas I mean to communicate.
The thing I care about is what you, the reader, experience. My best idea to find out is to ask. So I'm doing that! Right now!
If you're familiar with at least a couple of my stories, then please let me know what you think my style is, or any other broad feedback you have on my writing. I've put hundreds of hours into writing these stories for you, and if you can take a couple minutes to give back, it would mean a lot to me.
You can leave feedback in the comments to this post, put them in a PM, track down my physical address and send a singing telegram, or whatever you like. I declare Crocker's Rules on everything I get this way. Please write feedback before reading this page's comments, to avoid accidental priming and conformity effects.
Since I'm asking you to do me a favor, it makes sense that I should do something for you, too. I will write a 500-1000 word story for one randomly-selected person who provides feedback. (Example, example.) Anonymous messages are eligible only if they include the prompt in the message itself, since obviously I can't get back to you. I'll pick the winner on Thursday, Dec 19, and try to have the story finished by Jan 1.
Thanks for helping me become a better writer!
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Is there anything that you think my stories have in common? Are there any traits my stories don't have? Are there things that make you go, "yep, that's a Benman story, alright"? Can you fill in "Benman's stories are ______?"
I've only read a few of your stories, so I suspect my impressions are incomplete at best. The biggest thing I've noticed that I'd say is consistent between them is your active avoidance of overarching direction to your stories. Whether it's the dramatic shifts of story arc in Mortal or the long delay (long relative to the story's overall length, anyway) in introducing the titular conflict in The Thousand Year Romance of Clover the Clever, you seem to like giving your stories a freeform, off-the-cuff design. I don't consider that a good or bad thing, inherently; it's just my (quite possibly misguided) sense of your tastes as a writer.
On a more technical level, it seems to me that you tend toward short, precise sentences, rather than more effusive or flowery language. You're not quite what I'd call a minimalist, but you're definitely at the opposite end of the fanfic language spectrum from someone like The Descendant in that regard. Again, I don't consider that a positive or negative, in and of itself.
The last thing which I've noticed is that you rarely seem to put much in the way of assumed morality into your story. Some of your stories do have morals, but those are (again, that I've read) presented within the context of a specific character's impressions, rather than as a fundamental part of how the world works. I quite like that about your fics, personally.
Hope that helps! Now, to go see what everyone else wrote, and find out how out-of-step I am...
The first and most consistent thing that comes to mind: You're one of the most laconic authors I've read. Your stories feel like thin, solid muscle on the bones of your outlines. (Frex: You have a tendency to stop scenes the instant their point is made, which drives me silently nuts on occasion, but I'm not sure your writing would improve if you extended them to establish more graceful segues.)
I'll put some more thought to it. I reserve the right to edit this and add more later (this whole don't-read-other-commenters-until-then thing will be tough, but okay).
Preemptively declaring myself, as your prereader, ineligible for the commission. Though I would be curious, also under Crocker's Rules, what you think of my style. It's a deep and slippery question.
I just realized I haven't read enough of your stories to say. I can't even read more than a small fraction of the stories published by my friends! And I spent almost the entire day on fimfiction today. Blargh.
Mortal and Happily Ever After seemed very different to me. Mortal had that free-form design Chris spoke of, and the style was functional, but HEA was tight and polished. At least, that's my recollection.
I hope I never have a style. If I have one, I hope to get rid of it. An author with a strong style is like an actor with a strong accent. Hemingway had a great style, but it meant he could only write one story over and over again. Same for Bukowski and Flannery O'Connor.
Fair warning I've only read your Comedy Slice of Life stuff and steered away from the sad/dark works so I can only comment on those.
I love your works because they're very succinct. It feels like you manage to put a lot of information into a very brief amount of words. Your Slice of Life especially really feels like a vignette. A small moment of time picked out of a stream.
Your comedy tends towards absurdist I think. It takes what seems like a fairly plausible situation and then proceeds to exaggerate it. It's impressive to me because you can always see the logical progression of events that leads that end but in many cases it's a route that I never would've considered til then. I also feel you tend to characterize everyone really well. Even for characters I've never seen or thought about before you make them feel familiar and appealing. They end up feeling like a character I knew before and had merely overlooked.
Once or twice it's felt too short. Lodestone I think is the only one I finished with a feeling of dissatisfaction. I recall feeling a bit like it hadn't really solidly wrapped things up and had left too many major story lines unfinished.
I suspect it might be more helpful to compare you to other authors but the only one I can think of who is even remotely similar would be Kwakerjak. That's because you both tend towards using fewer words and still painting a rich world.
Anyways, hope that helps.
Based on the stories of yours that I’ve read, I see two main types (styles) of stories.
One type is “a short, humorous story with a funny premise, containing puns and absurdity”. Such stories include Friend and Foe, My Even Tinier Ponies, and Changelings, Changelings, Everywhere. I don’t enjoy those stories as much as your other type, because the absurdity makes me feel disconnected from the action.
Your other type of story is “a philosophical exploration with a Less Wrong flavor”. These stories are The Thousand Year Romance Of Clover The Clever (about mortality and cryonics), Mortal (mortality), Mother of Nations (mortality and society), and Happily Ever After (psychology and consciousness). I liked all of these stories, except for the rare parts when they felt more preachy than showing a thought-provoking situation.
Though looking at and remembering The Trouble With Sympathy, it seems like yet another type of story. It has an interesting idea, but the story feels incomplete. It’s mainly about hypothetical worldbuilding. The plot is not resolved enough for me to understand how I should feel about it. The worldbuilding is related to philosophy, in the sense of “how ought you treat a person who has to hurt others to survive”, but the story wasn’t enough to help me answer that. Happily Ever After was similarly sparse, but it didn’t pretend to have a plot, just the interesting idea.
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Thanks, folks. This has been useful. It's often hard to tell what's working and what's not, and this gives me a better sense of it.
And now, the moment of truth has arrived! The winner of the commission is...
Screw it, let's go crazy. Everyone wins! PM me a prompt or post it here, and I'll turn it into a short thing. I'll try to have at least one done by Jan 1 as planned, and then at minimum one/week until they're all done.
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Let's see... your stories start with a character plus a situation and extrapolate forward, emphasizing character first and atmosphere* second. Plot isn't very important. (Fugue State and TONSIAH are the only ones where the plot matters, really.)
* I originally put “worldbuilding” here, but on reflection, atmosphere is the thing you're trying to do and worldbuilding is just the way you achieve it. It's the J. K. Rowling approach rather than the GRRM approach.
1627124 What's GRRM?
I'll forgo my commission, out of fear for your sanity if you tried to do them all. I think you'd be better off writing something that you want to write, anyway.
1627124 I'm really tempted to lump in with Bad Horse on this one. I don't want you to lose your mind...although there are one or two ideas I'd love to see you take on...Maybe after the holidays so you get a chance to breathe a little.
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This guy.
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Does 500 words/week really seem sanity-crushing? Last time I tried something like this, I did two in one week, had fun, and produced some stuff I'm pleased with.
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Thank you for your generous offer. I have finally come up with a story prompt:
No need to rush the story, since I took so long to find a prompt. I hope you have fun!
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I was hoping to have this one done by now, but that hasn't happened because of reasons. I have a vague idea what I'll do with this. I don't know when it will be finished.
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Thanks for the update. I’m okay with waiting.