Short story. Epic Rap Battle.

With click a bang and what sounds like a snapping rope Trixie, the showmare's cart opened up to make a spectacular stage. Two fireworks fired into the air, hardly visible on the daytime clear sky. The blue unicorn looked up and raised an eyebrow. "Why the Tartarus it do that? Damn old thing." She said kicking the side of the old but certainly not trusty chart. It didn't really matter. With the bits she was going to make in this next show she could buy ten new carts. What she was standing on now was Canterlot Stage, the grandest of all show stages in the whole of Equestria, the greatest of pony performers have played on that stage. Everypony came to see to who's who here, even the princesses! It was odd to think that only a few months ago she was being thrown out of a dump like Coltorado. She wasn't sure if Twilight was really trustible yet, but this was a nice "end of rivalry" gift.

She looked to the stands, there was four ponies there, and two foals! That wasn't because that's all the seats that were sold, Canterlot Stage hasn't not sold out for years and Trixie's act was no exception, it was just early. Still two hours before the show begins. Trixie felt content with herself, even with the crappy cart and the yet to be filled stands. She turned back to go in the cart to make sure she was ready. There was nothing that could possibility ruin her day... Not even the yellow and orange pegasus standing in her way. Trixie looked the pony over, a wonder bolt jumpsuit with the hood pulled down. That's new. "Can Trixie help you?"

Spitfire was enraged at the wizard clothes wearing unicorn. "Can you help me? HELP! Your on the Wonderbolt's stage! We're doing a show tonight!" Spitfire's eyes reflected her name and her mane. "Get off before I call the authorities on your plot for illegally occupying the Canterlot Stage! And don't think that I don't think that I won't also throw in those magic missiles that you shot at me into the report!" Spitfire's voice was highly annoying, it seemed to crack too. A vein popped out of her neck, Trixie wasn't listening.

"Listen here, Buttercup. Trixie has been on a waiting list for this stage for the last three months, and it's impressive that I got that. I know the date that I'm suppose to be here. I've memorized the damn document that I got from Celestia! Now get off Trixie's stage!" Trixie came back, giveing just as much rage as her unwanted intruder. The shorter mare stood up tall and put her face right in front of Spitfire, showing no fear. Backing down would cost her chance for a comeback, and that was NOT something that could be lost for Trixie. There was whispers of the Wonderbolt's "surprise" shows for a decade. Some rumors persisted that they stool shows from innocent ponies just to build their own fame.

Spitfire just store back into Trixie's amethyst eyes, unflinching. This would be over quickly in her eyes, she wasn't about to let some no name mare steal the wonderbolts'... no, The world's honor of seeing the fantastic fliers.

A cough caught the mares' attention, mainly as it was only a foot or two from the side. They looked and saw a burgundy Earth pony, with a midnight blue mane standing in place looking back on stage with them. "You know what this means, right?" He said.

The mars looked at each other, then back to him, "What?" They asked in unison.

The stallion coughed to clear his throat. "It was stated in the year 273 that if there were to be two acts scheduled for the same night on the Canterlot Stage, then a representative from each act must take part in a competitive poetry duel to decide the act that will play the night." He smiled, assuming that they both knew. When he got only raised eyebrow in return he sighed, He hated this term. "An Epic Rap Battle..."

Trixie and Spitfire looked back at each other, and grinned.

~~~~~~~~~~~

It took minuets to get everything ready. Trixie was already set up with headsets and a loud music player. As well as effects like lights, lasers, and a fog machine.

Trixie kicked her malfunctioning fog machine with her front hoof. "Damn thing." She mumbled.

"Hay! Wizard of skid row, are we ready to go yet?" Spitfire shouted from the other side of the stage.

Trixie stepped up and took her spot. "Yeah. Yeah, I'm ready to go." She grumbled in a dark tone. She nodded to the burgundy Stallion, and he started the music.

"Competitive poe...uh. Ahem. EPIC RAP BATTLE

TRIXIE LULAMOON

VS.

SPITFIRE

BEGIN

For those that don't know, my name is Trixie. Allow me, to wow thee.

My tricks are are smoke free. Unlike how my mix is going to blow thee.

The title is Great and Powerful like a storm roving over you.

Going to jolt you, wonderdolt.

Sompony call the colonel! We'll have fried chicken at the funeral.

Are You don yet? That was pitiful. I'll take your title like I'm taking the show, "Mis Powerful."

Walk away, before I fly you there. didn't your mother tell you to beware?

I'll tell you, don't mess with fire! I'll scorch you till I tire.

You're messing with the worlds fastest flier! I'm the world's fastest flyer!

From what I hear, Soarin's the fastest in your show. But you should tell us, you would know.

Trixie wouldn't sick as low to sleep with a pig with a fetish for pie. I can see why he wanted you, the doughtiest thing in the sky!

Hear that? You're about to choke. Oh wait, it was the record I just broke.

Your a deceiver, I'm a receiver.

Playing with the all-stars, you just a no star.

Move along little jester.

THIS IS OUR GIG!

"That hardly rhymed." Trixie said, as the music faded. She looked out at the stands, and her eyes grew wide. The stands were packed, all og them looking and waiting, a few cheering. She was awed by it for only a moment, then the Red pony yelled into his microphone again.

WHO WON? WHOSE NEXT? YOU DECIDED!

"What do you mean whose next?" Trixie said rubbing her ear, if an answer was said it was inaudible over the sudden roar of the crowd. Trixie didn't even think that it was that good. What could they possibly be cheering?

Her train of thought was halted as she felt a bump on her shoulder. She looked and her eyes grew wider for Princess Celestia stood above her. "I'd say you won Ms. Lulamoon. One because of the poem, and two because you are scheduled for today." She then walked over to her pegasus general. "As for you, while I do like that you held the rules of the stage at heart, I'm afraid that you and your team are here next week. Please make a note of it and go."

Spitfire stood at attention, saluted then flew off, only letting her blush out when she was out of view. It was as much about the loss, or the superior telling her to buzz of, it was that she realized she never read the paper tell her when the show was.

Celestia turned her attention to Trixie one more time. "Now I expect this to be a good show, right?" she took the mare's stunned silence as a yes, and walked off to take her royal seat in a high press box.

Trixie shook her head. "Show... SHOW!" She lit her horn and fired two firework cannons from her cart into the air, making a splattering of color on the dark night sky. Time to begin...

~~~~~~~~~~~

Little under three hours later the crowd was dispersing to their homes, and Trixie was standing over the broken pile of splinters that was once her cart/home/stage. While disappointing to Trixie that a trick had gone awry, the audience thought it was a great way of ending a show. Trixie cared little in the end. the cart was worthless and it was the only mistake of the night, meaning she nets her large amount of bits and she'll get publicity to no end. She walked off, taking a few things from the wreckage and going to find a hotel for the night.

But even after the stands had emptied Trixie was not alone. She had just made a very Jealous shadow this night. One that will seek her justice one day soon.

-end-

Author's notes: Just a idea I had. It's the first part in a series that I want to do. Based on ERB on YouTube. And yes I do now that there is somebody on this site that already has the idea. Go suck a noodle. However he is, he is good at it. I suggest finding him on your own accord. I'm not going to give a link.