• Member Since 8th Jan, 2012
  • offline last seen Mar 13th, 2013


Hi, I'm TAW. I write terrible erotic my little pony fan fiction about cartoon horses having sex with each other, or vaguely defined human audience-inserts, for fun. Because... uh. I have no shame?

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I am alive (Trigger Warning: pointless angst/drama) · 11:10am Jan 24th, 2013

I'm getting quite a lot of people asking publicly and privately "What's up, TAW? You aren't doing much." lately and I'm kind of getting sick of it, so I figure I'll answer it loudly and publicly.

Firstly, as I mentioned in my last blog, I was not able to write over Christmas due to lack of sane tools. I only returned home two weeks ago, which would be a good turnaround time for a story anyway. There's no reason for anybody to be complaining yet if you had paid attention, or at least checked my blog first. I appreciate that people want to know, but the hostile ones really did not help.

Secondly, those people are correct; I am not doing much. I have a few paragraphs of the next chapter of WBHW and an abandoned half-draft of a sequel to Fighting Feelings, and I can't stomach the thought of continuing either.

I didn't want to "make it official" because I hoped it would pass more quickly, but this is not being the case. From this moment I am on indefinite hiatus. I am feeling very burned out on writing in general as well as severely disillusioned with the fanbase and the fanfiction community, and am going through a low period IRL as well. I have no plans to stop entirely, but I also have no plans. I do not know how I will proceed from here and I did not want to get here. I do not know when I will continue. I do not know.

I am sorry.

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Comments ( 66 )

1. Aww...
2. What ungrateful [censored]!

Peace and prosperity, ye silly pony:eeyup:

I say take all the bucking time you need and then take a few more days just because.

Believe me, I understand. Writing is like gardening. Sometimes you have to stop pulling up every little shoot that breaks through the ground and let some ideas grow and germinate. I hope you find peace and happiness.

Only thing you can do is wait and see if it passes. I'm going through a bit of a patch of negativity myself (not really from me, but from some other people, which brings me down just as effectively), which really has left me drained enough to not want to do anything, it's been getting better since I've temporarily distanced myself from those people, but there's still a ways to go.

If you need an ear, I'm always happy to talk, though. Otherwise, just sit back from the community, watch some movies, play some games, read a book, do whatever it is you do to relax and unwind. You owe no one anything as far as writing is concerned, it's something you do for fun, and if at the moment it isn't fun for you, then by all means put it aside for now. There is absolutely no sense in forcing something that doesn't want to come out. You'll only end up stressing yourself and making it worse. So take all the time you need, and I'm always on Skype if you need something. :)

we still love you

Well, I say take a vacation. You've earned it.

I love vacations. Now I wanna vacation.

I do hope you'll get back into the swing of things soon, but there's no need to apologize for needing to take a break.

Best wishes to you IRL.

Honestly, 2 weeks is barely a blip on my radar for someone to be poofed, so I hadn't even really noticed...Hopefully you get your motivation and mojo back soon though, I've misplaced mine for over a year XD

Take care of yourself first.

Fimfiction is supposed to be fun for everyone involved. I know I'll be waiting patiently for however long it takes for you to find the fun again. Your writing is worth it.

Have a good long rest.

:pinkiesad2:dont worry, we all still love you

People need to chill out and stop pestering authors.

:ajbemused: Why are you apologizing? I will never understand why authors do this, you have nothing to apologize for, you provide pretty words for free out of the gooeyness of your heart. We, as the readers, have no right to demand anything from you, nor do we have any right to criticize you about anything (unless you specifically ask it of us).

TAW, take all the time you need or want, you owe us nothing, so stop apologizing.

You're alive?! I thought you were dead! :pinkiegasp: :rainbowlaugh:

I kid, I kid. Take it easy, TAW. I too know the terrible sting of writing burn-out; so go recharge your batteries.

Incidentally, you should totally check this out:


Noble deeds and hot baths are the best cures for depression.:pinkiehappy:
― Dodie Smith

Shame on Crackle's inbred cousins if they see it it to tax you as much as they'd like, TAW. /)

Aaaw... Sad to hear that you're burned out on writing :/

I just hope you get the will to write again soon. I really like WBHW

I know how you feel Taw I know how you feel /hugs

Meh. Sucks to see you go.
I've had a lot of accounts, and each one's followed you without fail.
It'd be awesome to see you come back, but if you don't, I suppose we can smile cause it happened, not cry because it ended.
Either way, I'll still keep on a lookout for new TAW stuff. Even if I never see it again.

Just hang in there and do what you need to do. Those that actually get hostile because you aren't writing deserve to be slapped silly.

and listen to to this one 746358. He speaks with wisdom.

:raritydespair: But I thought you existed solely to entertain me!

No regrets, dear. You've done so much for us here. Written some very memorable stories. Made valuable insight in your blogs and comments. And I personally can't thank you enough for running the contest that got Stubborn as Ponies noticed. And 100% of it was beyond what you owed to anyone.

Do what you feel is best, and take all the time you need. I suppose I'll be sad not to see entries from TAW in my notifications anymore, but it'll be a selfish sort of sad, and one I can get over if you don't come back. Here's hoping that isn't the case, but it's okay if it is. Have a good one, TAW!

746697 Took the words right out of my fingers. :ajsmug:

TAW, do your thing. Don't be sorry. It's your life, and you owe nothing to anyone. You have to look out for #1, because if your not happy doing something, then what is the point in doing it? :derpytongue2:

Good luck to you, and I hope you find a way out of your RL issues. :twilightoops:

Finally. Thank You for everything you have already given us. :twilightsmile:

Well, whatever happens, thank you for all the fics that you've written.

There are some real gems in your story archive that you should be really proud of.

I didn't mean for my comment to be taken badly. I hope you are letting people help you, where applicable.

I really hope you get inspiration back soon, I really like your writing :pinkiehappy:

I am sorry.

For what? Come on, life's more important than clop-based internet recognition. :raritywink:

I don't, by all means, mean to berate your accomplishments (your stories aren't just simple clop after all, they're a shining example of how to keep proper characterization and overload reader with cutness :pinkiehappy:, among other things), but some of us can understand that there's life beyond pony. :pinkiesad2: I can only hope those impatient asses' whining won't make you hate the rest of your reader base. :rainbowkiss:

Anyway, I wish you all the good luck with anything that life throws at you! :twilightsmile:

Take all the time you need, and we'll be here when you get back.:pinkiehappy:

I can say that, if that makes u feel better, you milked me dry more than any women I ever knew.
Just good job, good luck and hope we'll see you again.

No worries - I don't mind waiting for the next chapter for WBHW cause I love a bit of TwiDash and hey I can always just re-read it :D It is just awful to hear that some people were being hostile towards you so I rather be the one apologizing to you for having to deal with people such as those so you have no need to apologize to us as we are supposed to be all friendly towards each other isn't that what being a Brony or Pegasister is all about - Love & Tolerate ponies


Why is it that everyone is just going crazy and leaving the fandom, not saying you are.
I mean did someone put something into everyones water here at FimFic?

Well I wish you all the best nonetheless, Keep Calm and Flutter On.

Carry On

I completely understand what you mean about getting burnt out with writing. I have three stories that I am working on sporadically. And I really WANT to write for them, but if I sit down and try to force myself to write, either nothing happens and I get frustrated, or what I do end up writing is beneath my standards. I know better to just let the creativity come on it's own. Please don't feel beholden to your fans that you have to write. Take all the time you need until YOU are ready to return. We'll still be here.

Wishing you the best of luck. - Shakespearicles

Oh well, I wish you good luck in whatever you decide to pursue now.

Take your time. People don't accomplish anything when they're rushed (haste makes waste!) and I'm more than willing to wait a while for you to do anything. Just promise me one thing: if you end up just giving up, go out with an explosion ^_^.

Also, f*** the people who would dare accuse you of your unintentional hiatus. Has patience been forsaken for it's opposite, impatience?


I accidentally spilled a dangerous vial containing an unknown microorganism into the water... I think it causes symptoms included paranoia, and ultimately fandom ditching...

...wait... crap.

Time to make a cure.

Take whatever time you need, TAW. I have no problem waiting, especially if things are going on IRL. I'd hate to make you feel pressured into putting stuff out for us. :twilightsmile:

It's okay, TAW, we still love you,

I don't accept your apology... only because you have nothing to really apologize for, shit life happens.

Visit reddit.com/r/MyLittleSupportGroup if you need it. They help everyone, and would love to meet you. You're an awesome person and I hate to see you depressed.

I'm just glad it's public now; I hope that this lets you rest and recharge, either for more pony, or more something else - whichever you decide you want.


I know people like you. Here's what you do; stop giving a shit about us for ~two months. If you're getting emails from the site, make it stop. As far as you are concerned, we do not exist.

Then, and this is the important part, don't stop writing. You're a writer. Don't make yourself write, but never say "No, I shouldn't write". If the mood strikes you, just write. It doesn't need to make sense. It doesn't need to be good. It could be a narration of a hundred ways to skin a cat. It doesn't matter. You are writing for you, and no one else. Not us, not your friends, not your family, not the voices in your head (assuming you have them, which is a very real possibility if you don't deal with burn out). You.

Authors don't retire; they just stop publishing (sentence taken from a Heinlein book I read a while back).

Hm. While I don't follow you (you don't really write my type of story), it does piss me off to see you're having this type of problem. Entitlement is one of the things that really irritates me out of all proportion, particularly when used to attack someone like you; even though I don't follow you, I respect how much you've accomplished.

To the (hopefully, very few) people who still feel that they're owed entertainment from TAW, let me quote and paraphrase Neil Gaiman;

[TAW] is not your bitch.

This is a useful thing to know, perhaps a useful thing to point out when you find yourself thinking that possibly [TAW] is, indeed, your bitch, and should be out there typing what you want to read right now.

People are not machines. Writers and artists aren't machines.

It is sad to see another one go... but I still have hope you will recover. I also had a phase were I couldn't stand the fandom and everything about it but I got over it. So will you. Even if you wont write anymore, your stories always gave me a smile, even when I was down.:pinkiehappy:

So... Just get your mind away from all the MLP stuff for a while. It will come back on its own when you are ready again.
Meanwhile: I wish you the best you can hope for:twilightsmile:

You're on hiatus? This is the worst customer service I've ever seen. I demand a refund!

Silliness aside, take as much time as you need. I've been there before. I'll probably be there again. Feeling guilty about not updating just makes it worse. Making promises about when you'll come back also makes it worse (so good for you for not doing that). Just forget about ponies for a while. Or continue to enjoy ponies but forget about fanfic for a while. Whatever you need to do.

What you are talking about is perfectly normal. It's the reason I keep a backlog of novels, fanfics, tv shows, DVDs, music to check out, and video games at any one time. So that if I ever get tired or disillusioned or burnt out on my main, I don't just wallow, I have tons of fallbacks to keep my mood and interest up, and then I slowly shift it back to where I need it. Much easier skating across a level plane than skiing down a hill and trekking back up.

I disagree on one point. People DO have the right to criticize anyone and anything they want. Everything should be open to criticism, that's very important. Although, it's still true that anyone who whines about getting less top-quality free content than they were at some point in the past is an entitled asshole.


I meant the criticism that TAW and all other authors get for not updating fast enough, not the criticism that can improve stories and the like.

Shoot, TAW, don't worry about it. You're still one of the best damn author of TwiDash fics in existence. (I'm afraid the mysterious author of Xenophilia is going to remain my all time top--Sorry!) We all go through our lows. Just remember that for every less than satisfactory person in this fandom, there are at least three others who shine brightly and who do their best to make others feel better, Take care, TAW. Sort out what you need to sort out. If anyone here actually enjoy your works, then they will respect the fact that you just don't feel like writing. Despite what readers believe, us authors are not simply made of infinite words and stories.


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