The Kaiser's New Clothes, chapters 5, 6, & interlude 1

He finished his cup, and was about to close the timeline when Mr. Pitter of all people spoke up.

"You already knew each other, before?" he asked, carefully glancing between them.

"Of course," Coil said casually. "The Alcott family lives on my street. We're neighbours."

"He shoved me into a dumpster and locked me in all night!" his pet said accusingly, pointing a finger at him. "It was gross and slimy and cold, and I had to sleep on old newspapers!"

Coil snickered to himself.

"Priceless."

The Kaiser's New Clothes
Chapters 5, 6, & Interlude 1

(Fanfiction.net version).
(Spacebattles version).

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Multi-update, since I've been neglecting these blogs for a while. I figure by now most people who are interested in my Nazisploitation comedies and/or Wormfics are already reading on the other sites. But I like to have these for redundancy's sake.

I also wrote a short self-contained omake for Christmas, about Kaiser's even more racist and insane father and sister. Hope you like!

Comments

[Posh]

Posh : Who is the biggest incel in the lands between

I think it’s Varré

who literally tries to sign you up for Men Going Their Own Way.

DannyJ: Morgott. Loves the Erdtree, but it won't let him smash, so he just eternally simps for it while taking out his bitterness on random tarnished.

Plus he's an omen.

Posh: i don’t think he wants to fuck the tree

DannyJ: How do you know?

Maybe he would if he could, Posh.

Maybe he keeps trying to fuck that one Erdtree avatar that teleports in on the main street, but it keeps rejecting him with its AOE attack and then pelting him with golden lasers until he runs off back to his throne to cope and seethe. (edited)

Posh: how would you fuck an erdtree avatar

DannyJ: I'm sure it has a knothole somewhere that he could use. It's made of wood.

Posh: Speaking of omens

Did you beat mohg

DannyJ: Yes. I Mohged on him.

I am gradually making my way through shadowy nightmare land now. Currently in that one castle place with the poison swamp.

Posh: that does not narrow it down

[DannyJ]

5832543

To this day, nobody has been able to disprove my fuckable Erdtree avatar theory.