What do you call it

When you're to weak to live but to scared to die?

I'll be honest, and I know nobody will see this because let's be real. Any followers I did have have forgotten about me because I'm a bad writer who never updates.

I'm considering killing myself. I'm almost 21 and I have no future.

So. Yeah. this was me screaming into the void.

Comments

[Jmunoz13]

Hi, I want you to know that I haven't forgotten about you and let me tell you now that I love the Villain Pub story you wrote and enjoy rereading it every now and than, everyone has their moments they think's they're a bad writer myself included, even I'm trying to work on my own stories that I want to publish on here one day, suicide is not the answer I know because I've had suicide thoughts too and I know for a fact it's not the answer to your problems it'll only bring pain and sorrow to your family and friends. I ask that you seek help and rethink your choice before you make a decision you'll regret I will pray that you will over come your depression and suicidal thoughts.

[Prince Moon Shinning]

Hi, I barely know you but I would never forget you.

[Stolenalicorn]

You're only 21. Don't get me wrong, crap is as bad at 21 as it is at 38, but there's still plenty. You haven't been around long enough to really screw up yet. And you know what, sometimes screwing up is actually pretty fun.
I know the feelings well, but if you hold on you can find things to look forward to. Find something to push you forwards. This site and those on it (yourself included) helped me see some light in the darkest times of my life.
Give yourself time, try to look at what's with you right now and start seeing what you can work on that you don't like. Push forwards and you'll typically find yourself somewhere better. Or at least somewhere else, where there's new options.
Here's one hard thing, though. You have to force yourself to act. There is no magic fix, but you can find little moments of happiness pretty much anywhere if you act. I know, I've been in some really crappy situations and had to find even one little thing to hold on to.
I've stared down the barrel, and felt the edge of a knife plenty in my life. I asked myself that same question you started with. I felt I'd found the answer, but never that there would be peace. And not in some religious way, just that it would be the last thing I knew. Ever.
You're 21, and you have a future. But it's going to be hard won. And that's if you even see where it's going.
Scream into the void, it helps. Just letting it out even for a moment helps.
You can keep going. You're more resilient and resourceful than you realize.

[A bag of plums]

Don't give in to the urge to kill yourself. You're better than you might think, and you're still alive now. That means you're not struggling with depression, depression is struggling with you.

Do not let it win.

We've known each other for a while now, and I believe in you, even if you might not currently believe in yourself. You have improved and grown both as a writer and as a person, and I for one would not want anything bad to happen to you, least of all death.

You got this.