Fucking hell · 4:38am Dec 20th, 2012
(listen as you read)
Lone blades is going to be held up...
maybe a week... maybe a while.. maybe forever...
She was the one. My angel.. My Eve, and me her Adam. Hell, the only reason I started to write Lone Blades was because i was happy, being with her.. my girlfriend.. And now?
Now it's gone. Now she's gone, out of my life. I was too blind to see what our (what i thought small) arguments hurt her.. how even the littlest thing i would say to come back at her (whether it be logic or not) would utterly destroy her, making her cry...Breaking promises because of a fuck up countless times, taking its toll on her for 387 days.. I've fucked up. I've fucked everything up, all because I was to blind to open my eyes and see the pain i caused.. all the games... all the texts that took me twenty minutes to respond to.. all because of fucking video games.... But it's my anti drug.. and now -my love- she's out of my life...
We may have only been seventeen, but God damnit, we had plans. We were going to graduate from college together, with dr.'s in Psychology. We were going to have a kid name Chuck, when we decided we were ready... We were going to own a psychology business, and a large house with a hammock on the side, a front porch, large back and front yard, in a clearing together.. We were going to grow old together, for Christ's sake.. Die together..
but now its gone. Everything.. Our plans.. hearts.. are they shattered like glass, like the reality I'm living in?
Something inside has died...
I'm in ruins...
I'm at the end of the road... I have no control...
My thoughts.. ooh they have taken their toll..
my soul is broken... We were two halves of a whole... and now its gone... just like our future together..
Something inside has died... Was it my heart? My soul? my will?
Only God knows...
Keep Calm And Read On
~Solar Eclipse
Sorry to put this up.. I just need to vent... and there it is...
do not be concerned for my safety.. I'm not going to do anything irrational... I'm not there yet...
Stay strong my friend, even when the times couldn't be worse. We're here for you.
I am very sorry to heat that, dude. I have never been in a serious relationship, so I don't have much advice to give. The one thing I can say is that all is not lost; there is that which is yet to be discovered in life. Dwell not in the past, but rather look hopefully to the future.
Also, I don't pretend to know your plans or feelings right now but I still intend to work a bit on the next chapter tomorrow.
Best wishes,
Shanenator
Remember, whenever you need ears to talk to, we are here and we always will be.
635891>>630415>>630465>>630799>>631045
We got back together, thank God.
Thank you all for your support!
Shane, to the document!!! TONIGHT, WE WRITE IN HELL!!!
636992 Yay!! I'm so glad to hear things are working out after all.