Ghost Mike's Ponyfic Review Monday Musings #37 · 6:01pm Nov 14th, 2022
I guess I’m looking forward to Pokémon Scarlet and Violet coming out on Friday, though I tend to play new Pokémon games at my own pace these days, which is less hectic than most people’s need to finish it in a week. My association with the franchise these days is a little grey in places, and the online community is to blame for that partially, to the point I often tend to just enjoy it on my lonesome more often than not. To a degree, anyway.
Even apart from a new main series Pokémon RPG inbound, I’ve got quite a substantial backlog of Switch games to play – still haven’t started either Kirby and the Forgotten Land or Kirby’s Dream Buffet (saving the former for Christmas bliss, personally), I’ll be picking up Mario + Rabbids Sparks of Hope alongside Scarlet (the original was a dope turn-based strategy game), Wave 3 of the Mario Kart 8 Deluxe Booster Course Pass will be here before the year’s out (and the tracks have improved with each wave), and I also have several digital titles I picked up in sales I’ve yet to touch. Including Wonder Boy: The Dragon’s Trap, Star Wars Episode I: Racer, Child of Light, Blossom Tales (less unique now the Switch store is full of Zelda clones, but it’s still got a good enough rap) and Super Bomberman R (it was five quid, even some mild single player diversions will justify that). Certainly, I’m not lacking for content or diversity, unless one wants games with adult age ratings in there. I think I need to be more okay with forgoing the pressure to try and write fanfic and just have gaming fun without feeling bad about it. I’ll try and let myself go at least a little come Christmas.
Anyway, lighter week here: for the first time in a while, no novellas or novelettes to inflate the word count, and none of these one-shots break the 6K word count either. Eh, still gonna have the odd week of purely bite-sized one-shots here and there. Still waiting on Ancestral Tribute results to go live, had to dip into other stuff from the backlog for another week. Hope it’s still to your liking.
This Week’s Spectral Stories:
Misty Needs a Hug by EileenSaysHi
Closing Time by MalWinters
Edited By by Bandy
The Best of Tensions by BlazzingInferno
The Worst of Mentions by BlazzingInferno
Weekly Word Count: 21,346 Words
Misty Needs a Hug by EileenSaysHi
Genre: Drama/Slice of Life/Sad (Alternate Universe)
Zipp, Misty, Mane 5
3,184 Words
October 2022Listened to via StraightToThePointStudio's reading
All night long, Zipp’s suspicions about the unicorn guest Izzy has thrown this sleepover for have been mounting. Unaware of the unicorn traditions Izzy cites, constant diverting statements, and a nervous disposition beyond simply being around new ponies. Yet even given that, Zipp didn’t mean to drive her away. In the midst of Izzy reminiscing about all the home comforts of Bridlewood that she misses, Zipp notices their vacant guest still lingering in the garden outside, and decides that perhaps Izzy isn’t the only one in need of some comfort right now.
There is, in a sense, not a lot to review here; what one thinks of this fic is almost guaranteed to be proportional to how frustrated they were with the incompetent juvenile writing and wheel-spinning present in The Traditional Unicorn Sleep-Over, and how willing they are to roll with Zipp showing empathy once she picks up that Izzy’s an abuse victim. But I would not want to leave it at just that, because within those parameters, EileenSaysHi shows some effective nuance.
For starters, it avoids the “Mane 5 are as sharp as a sack of bricks” writing that plagues MYM, by having Zipp deduce quite a bit and make a perfectly logical deduction, yet remain just that one key detail off. Such a simple trope, and yet an important one here. Next, a good balance is struck between Zipp being curious and probing for details from Misty, and yet showing empathy and patience. Obviously, the fic gets to cheat on this by not having to resolve the aftermath, only stating that Zipp intends, at a later point, to find out where Misty came from and who abused her. Yet though it is, thus, narratively incomplete, it is emotionally complete, with a coda on Misty still feeling faithful to Opaline yet being hesitant enough off the evening’s event to not instantly report back to her the way she did in the episode. Considering one of the (many!) major problems was the episode sidestepping actual growth and hesitance on Misty’s part for an endless stream of “she’s a terrible spy” jokes, it’s a welcome change.
Naturally, what amount to a fixfic for a MYM episode has a lot working against it, and only readers already carrying some affection for Misty will get anything out of this. But within those parameters, the balance of character intelligence, patience, empathy, and some satisfying emotional beats leave it quite successful. A fragment taking advantage of being a fragment, but one you don’t mind in doing so.
Rating: Pretty Good
Closing Time by MalWinters
Genre: Slice of Life
Other, Pinkie, Raindrops
4,719 Words
September 2013
What started as just Pinkie Pie bamboozling her into letting a tomato go for half price soon turns into a trail of disaster for Roma, leading to a day of minimal earnings when she’s already struggling to make ends meet. And with her far too stubborn to even admit she needs help, much less accept it, it falls to her fellow market ponies to do something about it.
There’s a fair amount going for this story, beyond the concept ot making one of the hustling vendors in Putting Your Hoof Down sympathetic; it’s well-paced in transitioning from Rona’s bad market day to a perspective scene from Pinkie to the solution happening before Rona’s eyes the next day, with very smooth transitions in both material and perspective. It’s dense in content, presenting Rona as a barbed, prickly, stubborn sort who nonetheless is likeable and a comfort to those who know her, with many offhand lines that add a lot of character and variety to the proceedings. The depiction of the market ponies as those who’ll have each other’s backs works well, with them not mugging for sympathy and thus neither does the story. It’s not exactly a comedy, but there’s an amusing wit to some of the interactions.
Why, then, is the fic not scoring higher? Simply put, the story has major holes, ranging from a dropped character subplot for Raindrops (you know, the background pony mostly known for being a Lunaverse Mane 6) to the solution being totally incompatible both with the source episode and the very content of the fic itself, as regards how Rona could go from no business to all business off off the facts as presented to us here. In essence, it presents the situation therein as being transparently manipulated and constructed, taking a lot of wind out of the ending. And while essential to the story, the Pinkie scene in the middle feels tonally disconnected from the rest, going too far in placing all the important takeaways offpage between her moments.
That this can still be quite a satisfying slice-of-life character piece speaks to its other strengths, and, y’know, story ain’t everything all the time. So you may like this more than I did, on balance. Worth consideration, at least.
Rating: Decent
What’s a Twilight Sparkle to do when an unwritable essay presents itself? Bash her head against the deck repeatedly. It has many indents from prior such occasions already. Thankfully, she has Spike on hoof to advise on making it legible.
This is a fairly simple story of someone fretting over writing something important for a presentation, having it all flow and support each other on the prose level, and getting a fresh perspective from another. So, fellow editors, a fic after our own hearts. Outside of the opening setup, there isn’t much silliness to this either, and it portrays Spike as rather intelligent and level-headed, knowing much about this from all the letters and speeches he’s dictated over the years. If nothing else, it portrays a warm relationship of mutual respect between the two.
That said, the knowing tone of the setup doesn’t really mesh with the more sincere tone of the rest, not the all-too-familiar territory of managing sentence structure for readability, leaving it feeling more like a collection of bits. Amusing bits, but not ones all pointing in the same direction by any means. Making it feel a little soft on landing. Whether the base concept appeals to one is likely to be the deciding factor in how much one enjoys this.
Rating: Decent
The Best of Tensions by BlazzingInferno
Genre: Comedy/Romance/Random
Spike, Rarity
4,040 Words
July 2016Reread
Is a massage just a massage? Apparently not when it’s from a dragon. Rarity finds herself sheltering Spike after a book on massage technique for handed creatures has an unruly mob on his tail. Rarity finds herself most curious to see this massage in action. The better to solve this mystery and figure out how to dissipate the mob, of course, nothing more.
By and large, this is a pretty standard comedy of a spell gone wrong, even if the spell in question isn’t magical at all. Thus it falls to the execution to sell both the mob in full Ponyville Frenzy mode, and the blissful fantasies Rarity gets swept up in from Spike’s massage. It’s fine at the former, and better than fine at the latter. The same is true of most other bits throughout, with a Twilight cameo especially being quite strong, and the comic layering to the resolution is especially satisfying.
On the other hand, it’s still just a rather standard story done reasonably well. And the light Sparity might not be to everyone’s tastes (it isn’t to mine, but doesn’t aggravate as it’s used here, what with Rarity finding it disconcerting), but as it’s mostly a form of ridicule rather than being played straight, it works. Worth a dive for some light chuckles.
Rating: Decent
The Worst of Mentions by BlazzingInferno
Genre: Romance/Comedy
Rarity/Spike
5,565 Words
March 2017
Rarity and Spike are in the midst of trying to enjoy a quiet picnic when rumours and gossip from nearby ponies threaten to ruin everything. With Rarity in a spiral as she scrambles to make something out of this mess, it falls to Spike to save the day. Or at least to steer Rarity back on course.
That this story is barely connected to the prior one isn’t an issue, though that it abandons the deconstruction and plays the Sparity ship straight doesn’t help. And the way it chooses to portray that is… strange. Rarity is presented throughout as having no real self-esteem or confidence in her own abilities or attractiveness, with Spike being the benefactor of much “eligible bachelor heaven” gossip. Doesn’t really mesh with either of their set characterisation, does it? And with the tone trying to have its absurd townponies cake and eat its sincere takeaway too, it’s just a muddled mush.
Add in lots of no-context drops of bizarre info along the way, Spike being discussed as though there’s no age gap, and again, the bizarre choices in humour and characterisation that never coalesce, nor work on their own, and this is frankly a washout. Dunno how Sparity fans would react to this, but I can’t recommend it even to them.
Rating: Weak
Spooky Summary of Scores:
Excellent: 0
Really Good: 0
Pretty Good: 1
Decent: 3
Passable: 0
Weak: 1
Bad: 0
Seen. And yeah, it's always nice to see a fic where Spike has a brain.
From Passable all the way to Pretty Good?
Redemption!
It's funny to see you reference MNAH as a fixfic when I wasn't really intending it that way, more just as a "what could have been" alternate scenario. I actually enjoyed "The Traditional Unicorn Sleep-Over" and wanted to expand on the scene of Misty stressing herself out in the garden. Though I can't help but agree that Zipp is too airheaded in the actual episode. Still, I'm glad to hear the fic works regardless of your perspective on Make Your Mark!
"Fragment taking advantage of being a fragment" is probably way too apt a description for a lot of my stuff5697866
Well, you were playing outside of your usual writing zone with that Tom & Angel fic! In any case, that was a strong Passable (even with a seven-tier rating system, one still needs to see the review to fully gauge how it went), and this flirted on the Decent/Pretty Good border, but eventually I felt it acquitted itself just well enough to tiptoe over the line. And since I've yet to read any of the EqG fics that are your bread and butter, still fair to say I've only a loose familiarity with your writing still.
Fair enough. Most readers will still probably find it to be like a fixfic, especially with the (necessary) Alternate Universe tag. But it's a good fixfic, and to judge from its reception, that hasn't been an obstacle to its success. If anything, it's helped it, tackling an obvious blind spot from the episode shortly after said episode came out, when it was still fresh on folks' minds.
If I let my opinion on the Canon a fic is derived from affect my appraisal, I'd never be able to read a single fic set after Twilight takes over Equestria. Which would be chucking out a lot of fics, given many authors will write after that point on reflex even when the fic could take place much earlier.
Still fair to say most fics grappling with bad aspects of canon aren't worth it, of course, so I do have a fine-tuned sense for feeling out such fics for whether they'll be worthwhile. Yet sometimes (not often, but sometimes nonetheless), a fic makes great out of dodgy roots. As seen here. You can be proud!
It's not meant in a dismissive sense; just a fancy way of referring to a story that banks on saying future things will have to be sorted out, without ever intending to show that, as it would be too difficult to resolve satisfactorily. We all have stories like that, sure.
On an almost completely unrelated note, reading the shoutouts to Pokémon Scarlet and Violet at the start of this blog inspired me to resume a Pokémon Uranium Nuzlocke I haven't touched in months. Very tangential, of course, but either way, thanks for that!
:)
oh shit, a Soft Hands contest entry! :D
5697914
Yeah, that sounds like… one of the weirder old contests I’ve come across as a result of reading an older fic. “Applying the prompt however you see fit”, that’s… yeah.
5697912
In more recent years, I’ve fiddled around with other types of Pokémon Challenges: beating the game with a different starter only, minimum battles, that sort of thing. They’ve proven to be far more my speed!
Fixfics rarely interest me, but Misty does need a hug...
5697919
If I'm remembering correctly, this one's only my second. Uranium's one of those fangames that lets you have more than one save file, so I've been lucky enough to have my cake and eat it too in that regard. I'm not too well-versed in opinions about the game's pacing, but I have heard that its latter half can get a little level-jumpy in places; most infamously, just before the sixth gym… which happened to be right around where I stopped playing (albeit for unrelated, technical difficulty-based reasons). I had a Pokémon die shortly beforehand, so unfortunate as that was, finally getting their replacement up to speed has been a good excuse to get some preparatory grinding in. Wish us luck!
(On a related note, I currently have about 12.5K words worth of notes about the run thus far written down on my phone. I'm probably not going to make a comic/fanfic adaptation of it or anything, but acting like I am has been a good excuse to contemplate my Pokémon's personalities and get more attached to them before I inevitably screw everything up.)
Hey, two I've read.
It's been very long since I read "Closing Time," but I remember liking it well enough. and "The Best of Tensions" started out oddly, with a narrative voice that didn't match what was happening, but the author fixed that on editing. I'm not sure I ever went back and read the revised version.
5697917
you should at least read the other finalists, just to be safe ;D