The Viper Of Canterlot

by Jest


Striking Deals

Pursey glanced around at the bodies, eying them nervously. “Are you sure we should just, leave them here?” She asked hesitantly.

“You aren't planning on giving them a proper burial or something, are you?” I replied.

“Well no, but-”

“Then leave them,” I exclaimed. “I don't have the time to deal with corpses. Besides, any who stumble upon them will think it's some gang conflict anyway.”

“Oh,” Pursey muttered. “I just assumed you wanted to… Ya know.”

I stopped and gave here a confused look. “What are you talking about?” I asked.

She shrugged. “I just thought, given that you’re a snake,” she continued, gesturing to the dead kirin a few feet away.

“That I would…” I recoiled in disgust. “I don't eat thinking creatures, don't be gross. Now come on, before they start to smell and attract wild dogs or something.”

“Wait, if you want it to look like a gang fight shouldn't you take their valuables?” Pursey pressed. “If it was some kind of deal gone wrong they wouldn't just leave that kind of thing lying on the ground.”

“I…” I began, only to stop and frown. “That is an excellent idea. You get those bunch, I’ll grab these ones.”

The pony immediately regretted her suggestion and looked at me with big, pleading eyes. I, however, did not care, and turned away, slithering over to the nearest corpse, my hands going to his pockets. Though I didn't want to admit it, she had made a good point, and leaving them unlooted would probably cause problems for me in the long run. After all, gang violence can be brushed aside, ignored even, but a serial killer on the loose would warrant investigation, which I didn't want.

I had procured a wallet, and some gold jewelry and was moving on to the next when I noticed that Prusey was standing over one of the bodies. She seemed unnerved, one hand extended though her knees were unbent, the pony stuck halfway between action and inaction. I was about to tell her to hurry up when I noticed a faint golden glow emanate from the top of her head.

A moment later she was rummaging through the dead man’s pockets, a grimace on her face. Though disgusted, she continued her grim task until she had managed to find everything of value. This reminded me that I had my own job to complete, and I moved on to the next corpse, choosing the leader as my next target.

I didn't want to subject the pony to seeing the contents of the dead man’s cranium, so I intercepted her before she could look his way. As I knelt down I expected to feel a bit of revulsion myself but was surprised when I felt absolutely nothing. No, not nothing, but rather a faint hunger, though it was distant, like a whisper at the back of my mind.

It was easily ignored but even then it didn't go away completely, confirming for me that my humanity was well and truly gone. I had known this already given that I had felt nothing when I killed those other creatures but getting forced to face this fact was unpleasant. Still, I continued my self-appointed task, cleaning out his pockets and carrying around a growing pile of random expensive-looking items.

“Here,” Pursey offered after we had finished.

I looked over to find that the pony was holding a small mound of jewelry, wallets, seemingly random objects, and a surprisingly clean shirt.

“What's this for?” I asked, gesturing to the peice of cloth.

“We ponies wear clothes to hide our uh…. unmentionables,” Pursey offered, gesturing to her chest region.

“I know that you dolt,” I shot back, causing Pursey to recoil.

“I just thought that since you didn't have pockets this would help” Pursey continued. “And you can't exactly wear pants so thats not an option.”

I sighed and extended a hand.

“Give me the shirt,” I ordered.

Pursey silently did as she was asked, handing over the pullover sweater and taking my half of the loot. Tugging the thing into place I immediately noticed a problem, that being my rather prodigious bust.

“We’re gonna need something a bit bigger,” Pursey remarked as I struggled with the peice of clothing designed rather specifically for a male.

“Laugh it up washboard,” I shot back while trying to tug the hoodie down so that it covered more than just the top quarter of my torso.

“Hey, I’m not flat,” Pursey retorted.

“Coulda fooled me,” I muttered bitterly.

“You just think that because you have such large uh… wait, why do you have breasts anyway?” Pursey inquired.

“I think it has to do with the storage of poison but that doesn't matter right now,” I exclaimed only to sigh.

I gave up fixing the shirt and took the loot back, stuffing it into my new front pocket despite how awkwardly placed it was.

“Come on. I want to ask you a few questions before it gets too late and people start looking for you,” I ordered, gesturing back the way we came.

“Err, right,” Pursey murmured absently, suddenly crestfallen.

I started slithering back toward the exit, winding my way through the debris while being aware of the fact that I was carrying some loose items. It made my attempts at stealth slightly more difficult when compared to when I was completely nude, but I adapted quickly. Now that I was thinking about it, I kind of adapted quickly to killing and being butt-naked all the time as well. It helped that I didn't have nipples, or any exposed genitalia so it wasn't like there was much to be ashamed of.

Distracted by my thoughts, I left Pursey behind, only noticing that she wasn't nearby when I reached the end of the junkyard. Pausing at the exit, I looked through the junk we had recovered from the dead bandits. It was mostly gaudy, cheap jewelry that was likely fake and a few coins but we were also able to recover the magical device they had used before.

It looked a bit like a shallow bowl with three prongs sticking out of the rim at even intervals. These golden spokes held a single gem aloft in the center, beneath which was a single scrap of cloth. Bringing the peice of clothing up to my face, I gave it a sniff and found that it smelled exactly like Pursey.

“So that's how they did it,” I muttered.

I looked to the entrance to find that Pursey was jogging towards me, out of breath and exasperated.

“There you are,” I stated calmly.

“Oh, I kinda hoped you’d left,” Pursey remarked.

“You won't be rid of me that easily. Besides, we have the same mission now remember?” I prompted, waving the hand I had used to seal the agreement with.

“Uh yeah you mentioned that but what exactly are we defending against? Changelings? Griffons?” Pursey pressed.

“That will be revealed later, for now, let's head back to your place. I’m camped out near the back of the junkyard,” I exclaimed.

“Don't tell me you're squatting in the one-eighty-three airframe,” Pursey groaned.

“I don't know what its designation is but it's large and mostly hollow,” I remarked with a shrug.

“That's the one,” Pursey murmured. “First a bunch of kids make it their clubhouse, and now a snake monster takes residence there.”

“I am not a snake monster,” I hissed, getting right up to her.

Pursey winced and recoiled, raising her hands placatingly.

“S-sorry,” she stammered. “Don't hurt me.”

“I’m not going to do that. Just… meet me there,” I began, only to pause just before I was about to slither away. “Before you do, tell your sister you’re okay.”

I took off before she could reply, slipping into the shadows and vanishing from sight. The last thing I saw of the pony before I departed was her rather adorable confused expression. I’m also fairly certain she muttered something about how I knew that but I didn't care to explain myself.

Heading off, I slipped soundlessly through the debris, winding my way back to my current base of operations. It may have been a bit bold of me to simply leave the girl right after making our little pact but she seemed trustworthy. Not only that but whatever magic I had used on her seemed to be remarkably effective through no effort on my part. There was also the unspoken intimidation I had just used, but that was only mostly by accident.

I contemplated if what I had done was some kind of low-grade mind control, and if it was ethical for a few minutes. I tossed that little conundrum aside for the moment as it didn't seem like I had overridden her personality or anything. Which was good, as she was a sharp one, with a keen mind and a knack for details, that last one being perhaps the most important as it was a talent I lacked.

Thinking about her kind of made me feel a bit inferior in a way. I had always thought of myself as fairly smart, but when she pointed out that the dead gangsters still had their stuff I felt a bit stupid.

All this chosen one nonsense was going to my head, I thought to myself. Plus it didn't help that I had been alone until now, as already I could feel as though my social skills had deteriorated.

I brushed all that aside for the moment, as well as the slightly uncomfortable realization that my own personality was changing slightly.

Nope, stop thinking about that, you are going to go in circles. I told myself.

Thankfully my little self-talk worked, and before I knew it I was home, and my brain was not consumed with self-loathing. Rather, it had turned to the future and the plans that I had yet to lay for this city under a city in which I had found myself.

“Money, manpower, and above all, talent,” I murmured, slipping into my hallowed hull home. “But where to begin…”

I lost track of time after that, contemplating my plan of action for nearly an hour before I heard Pursey approach. I could tell it was her from the way she moved, tentative, yet strangely confident, like back in the warehouse. She emerged from the back end, grunting as she squeezed through a narrow gap and nearly falling after she was finally able to worm her way inside.

“Ahh good, you’re here,” I murmured. “I assume everything is alright.”

“Yeah, it's fine,” Pursey murmured. “My sister promised to cover for me.”

“Good, now tell me about-” I began.

“Wait just a second. I need to ask you a some things first,” Pursey retorted.

“Augh, fine. But only a few,” I murmured.

“Okay, first. What is your name?” Pursey proclaimed.

“I…” I stuttered, my gaze becoming distant.

I hadn't really thought of that little detail despite all the planning I had done. My old name was right out as it didn't fit, not anymore anyway. I needed something intimidating, something cool, but not too edgy as I wanted to be taken seriously.

“Do you have a name?” Pursey asked, her voice carrying a hint of pity.

“Yes, it’s…” I began, holding up a finger. “Seth, just Seth.”

“Thats fitting I guess. Though thats not exactly a very feminine name,” Pursey muttered.

“Well I’m not exactly a female, but enough of that,” I dismissed.

Thank god they didn't have the command and conquer series in this world. The name I had borrowed did fit rather well, I thought. It was intimidating, foreign, and kinda sounded cool when I said it given that I still slurred my s’s slightly.

“So uh who are we defending Equestria from, exactly?” Pursey asked, seemingly only half convinced there even would be an invasion given the levity in her tone.

“Likely an ethereal of some kind,” I muttered. “He or it will likely be at the head of a large extraplanetary invasion force.”

“Extraplanatory?” Pursey asked.

“Extraplanetary,” I corrected. “It means from outer space.”

“I… okay,” Pursey murmured.

“You don't seem convinced,” I pointed out.

“I weirdly am for some reason but it's still hard to imagine,” Pursey muttered to herself. “My dad always used to tell me stories about aliens but I never really believed him.”

“Well you better start believing because they are coming and when they get here they are going to unleash devastation the likes of which your planet has never seen before,” I stressed.

“I believe you,” Pursey stated, glancing down at her shaking hands. “I don't know why but I believe you. I can almost see it but its just flashes.”

“Likely an after-effect of the magic,” I remarked.

“How did you do that anyway?” Pursey pressed.

“I have no idea,” I replied with a shrug. “It's probably some kind of gift given to me by… on second thought you don't need to know about that.”

“Don't need to know about what?” Pursey inquired further.

“Don't worry about it, seriously,” I shot back, giving her a firm look. “First off, tell me about this place in a more general sense.”

“What, like my father’s junkyard?” Pursey murmured.

“No, the plate,” I exclaimed, gesturing around me. “I didn't think a place like this would exist so close to Canterlot.”

Pursey scowled, her expressions darkening.

“You wouldn't think so, given how pristine topside is but every city has its dark side,” Pursey remarked. “The rich and powerful always have dark urges and where money and desire meet, opportunity springs.”

“Very poetic.”

“Y-yeah,” Pursey muttered, snapping to attention. “A coworker of mine used to be a poet before ending up down here. His rants always sounded like they belonged on a stage, rather than in a back alley behind a cat house.”

“Cat ho-oh,” I muttered. “That is interesting, but not really what I’m looking for. How did this place start? Why is it allowed to exist, that kind of thing.”

“Because we do the work that Celestia needs done, but can't officially condone,” Pursey continued, her dour countenance returning. “On paper this is all crown land and we are nothing but filthy squatters. Given topside’s ban on heavy industry and the nobility’s fascination with flying machines, someone had to do the heavy lifting. They sure weren't going to do it themselves.”

“So a cottage industry of flying machines, gambling, and other such illegal activities crop up on abandoned land,” I murmured, rubbing my chin. “The nobles likely apply pressure to keep Celestia from clearing it out and return the people of the plate provide them with certain… distractions.”

“Pretty much,” Pursey all but spat.

“Okay, that makes sense given my observations,” I added. “So, is there a mayor, local governor… what manner of government, if any, is present down here?”

“Officially there is a land management team that holds authority over the entire plate but in reality, it's nothing more than a crime family masquerading as a noble house,” Pursey exclaimed, crossing her arms over her chest and scowling bitterly. “They are supposed to maintain orders and stamp out the gangs but really only do their job when someone does something really stupid.”

“Interesting, interesting,” I murmured.

“The leader is a guy called the governor,” Pursey remarked. “A real despot and total peice of shit. The major gangs pay him tribute and in return he does nothing but sit in his mansion and host lavish parties.”

“You say that as if you have personal experience,” I pointed out.

“A few years ago. Right when I started dancing and hadn't moved onto a different uh… department,” Pursey began, adding air quotes around the last word. “I was chosen to go to his mansion along with a couple of other girls. I thought it was going to be a great opportunity to make some real money, then I saw how the others looked.”

Pursey squeezed her arms around her chest and shivered.

“It was like they were being marched to their deaths,” Pursey all but whispered. “I made it out with only a few bruises but one girl had her face cut up all because she stared too long at some distant relative of the governor. The brotherhood took surprisingly good care of her but she was never the same since.”

“That is… dark,” I murmured.

“Yeah let's uh change the subject,” Pursey exclaimed.

“You mentioned these other major gangs. Tell me more about them,” I encouraged.

“Right, so there's my employers, the northern brotherhood,” Pursey remarked with a sigh. “As far as gangs go they aren't the worst. They got this whole honor amongst thieves thing and are surprisingly good to their employees but if you cross them…”

Pursey shivered.

“Look, let's just say that they are the last people you want to double cross. The predators might eat you, the regulators might repeatedly beat you senseless and the Platinums may turn you into a teacup but the brotherhood will do shit that would make Sombra blush,” Pursey continued.

“Noted. What about their businesses, base of operations, hierarchy, what do those kinds of things look like?” I inquired.

“They come from up north apparently,” she began, glancing off into the distance, as if she could see through the wall. “The border towns at the edge of the grey wastes, a harsh tundra filled with monsters. They made their fortune digging up old relics and selling them to collectors. Eventually, the market for those kinds of things shriveled up, and they moved onto gambling and whore houses.”

“Very maffiasque,” I muttered. “What about their structure?”

“Lots of emphasis on family but not the blood kind. You get adopted in, and once you prove yourself you’re part of the brotherhood for life,” Pursey stated. “Loyalty is absolute, and your new brothers are everything.”

“Hmmm,” I murmured to myself.

“That's about it really. I could go into more detail but you’ve got the gist of it already,” Pursey remarked.

“Okay, so what about the predators? I assume that’s the group that harassed you earlier,” I offered.

“They are scum,” Pursey spat. “Little more than mindless anarchists who cling to their bullshit code and pretend like they aren't dumb animals. They run a protection racket mostly, even shake down topside businesses sometimes. Other than that they sell themselves as mercs, and operate illegal fighting pits.”

“They don't sound the brightest,” I remarked.

“Most of them are dumber than a sack of hammers but don't be fooled, not all of them are stim-addled goons,” Pursey warned. “The big timers, the alphas, are cunning. Without them, the predators would be nothing.”

“That is fitting given the whole vibe they got going on,” I murmured absently.

“The less said about them the better. The others aren't much better though, especially the regulators,” Pursey continued, the pony clenching her fists and pacing back and forth. “They claim to be the only real justice down here but that's bullshit. I’ve seen them come through the parlour I’ve seen them at the Velvet Underground. They aren't the law, they’re just another gang, the only difference is they wear a uniform.”

I sat quietly and watched as Pursey continued to rant, the woman only becoming more heated with each sentence.

“Sure they sometimes get rid of the real psychos but they’ll only touch you if you’ve been cast out by the big gangs,” Pursey stated, kicking some invisible creature. “All the regulators really do is beat up the small fries because they can't actually do their job. If they had any actual balls they’d have taken on their boss, the governor, but no, all they do is kick the shit out of some greedy dealer and call it a day.”

“At least they aren't as pompous as they dickhead Platinums,” Pursey declared, placing her hand against her head and sticking out a finger, mimicking a unicorn. “They claim to be the true heirs of Equestria but everyone knows the Platinum line died out at the end of the unification wars. These conceited pieces of shit pretend like they are some kind of exiled noble clan plotting to take back the crown but they aren't interested in all that.”

“All their rituals, ranks, and secret orders are a smoke screen for a gang of losers who use their power to take control of the major merchant organizations,” Pursey explained, scowling. “They may act like a bank, with their huge cash reserves but they are loan sharks and gamblers plain and simple. Only an idiot would borrow from the Platinums because if you don't pay, the Matriarch will have your head on a silver fucking platter.”

Pursey turned to me only to realize just how worked up she had gotten.

“Oh uh yeah,” she murmured. “That's about it for the big players.”

“I like the energy,” I remarked. “I certainly ain't a fan of organized crime, but if I am going to get what I need I’m going to have to take over a few of these gangs.”

“It wouldn't be too hard. Most just mindlessly follow whatever the bosses tell them. All you have to do is use that mind magic of yours and you’d have half the plate in your pocket by this time tomorrow,” Pursey stated, gesturing to my hand.

“I have a feeling thats not how it works,” I replied. “They need to know what they are in for, and they have to agree. I might be able to force it but I don't think it would hold for long.”

“Shame,” Pursey murmured.

“So,” I began again, my hand falling to my side. “What about these small fries? Are there any who we might have a better chance of committing a hostile takeover of?”

“Well there is the Crimson Dawn and Azure Ocean,” Pursey remarked, extending a pair of fingers. “They are basically a bunch of buck ball hooligans that don't do much more than rig games, and bash each other’s heads in.”

The red and blue guys I saw when I was scouting, I thought to myself.

“Then there's the Daughters of Discord,” Pursey counted, adding another finger. “They run the Velvet Underground and a few other minor clubs around here. Not much is known about them. They say that the daughters are all discord worshippers but I don't know about that. They seem mostly sane.”

“Mostly?” I pressed.

“You don't do the kinds of drugs that pass through their clubs without ending up with a few screws loose,” Pursey replied.

“Fair, continue,” I offered, waving a hand.

“After that, it's just the Cabal, the Grey Shields, and the RC, or the Rusted Cog,” Pursey concluded, placing her hands on her hips. “The RC is the least bad. Honestly, the worst thing you can say about them is that they are ineffective.”

“That's the union your father is a part of,” I pointed out.

“How did you know that?” Pursey murmured.

“Don't worry about it,” I dismissed. “What do you know about the other two? The Cabal and the Grey Shields.”

“The Cabal is a bunch of unicorn dropouts that got expelled from some fancy topside school over some bullshit trumped-up charges a few years ago,” Pursey answered, a familiar scowl coming to her face. “Apparently they caught the principal dabbling in forbidden magic and tried to get him arrested.”

“And?” I prompted.

“They forgot the principal owned a newspaper company,” Pursey exclaimed. “He dubbed them the cabal of evil wizards in the press and they were the focus of a months-long smear campaign by nearly every news organization in town. Every shitty thing the principal did was put on them, and in the end the pressure worked. Charges were levied against them and a court date was set, likely due to a hefty number of bribes changing hands.”

“What happened next?” I asked, more invested than I cared to admit.

“They disappeared,” Pursey replied with a shrug. “Dodging the royal guard, they ended up down here, working as illegal magical good dealers. Rumour has it they’ll even raise the dead or use blood magic for you if the pay is right.”

“They seem useful,” I remarked.

“You have to be useful to survive down here,” Pursey pointed out.

“Right, so what about the Grey Shields?” I pressed.

“They were big players back in the day apparently,” Pursey began. “Were real good folk too if you believe the stories. Mainly protected the highland immigrants after the famines drove them out of their land.”

“It's like what happened to the Irish,” I whispered to myself. “Interesting.”

“Nowadays they are just another small-time gang clinging to what few towns will tolerate them,” Pursey spat. “Hard to believe that the death of one person would bring them so low so quickly.”

“Infighting? I presume there are more than one who claim to be the true heirs to their organization?” I pressed.

“Mr. Breezy wants to rebuild the Grey Shields, and Babs Seed wants to sell drugs, that's if you listen to the rumors at least,” Pursey answered. “I don't buy it though. That whole thing is one big game of he said she said.”

“The Grey Shields huh,” I whispered, tapping my chin. “They sound… weak.”

“Yeah they got like, three towns left, and no one respects them like they used to so support is pretty much nonexistent,” Pursey stated. “Nowadays they run the odd pub, sell drugs, and generally make a minor nuisance of themselves.”

“That sounds like a good place to start,” I proclaimed. “I just need to find out which one of these two is easier to control, then I offer to take care of the competition.”

“Well, I’d still be a little cautious. There is a reason they haven't been muscled out completely. They’re tough as nails,” Pursey added, pausing to yawn. “Damn, it's late. What time is it?”

“Dawn by the looks of it,” I remarked, glancing up to where the first few stray shafts of light pierced the holey exterior of my home.

“I need to get to bed,” Pursey muttered.

“Go on,” I encouraged, shooing her away. “I’ll start doing some recon. I’ll meet you back here tonight at midnight.”

“You’re really going to do this. Take over the plate that is,” Pursey half asked, half stated.

“Correction,” I began, holding up a finger. “We are going to take over the plate.”

“Oh joy,” Pursey muttered.