Joined November 2011
20,336 story views
56m, 58s ago

Yo Fimfic, they call me theycallmejub. I love to write and I love ponies so I figured this was the place for me. I also post on under the same name. Hope you guys like my stuff.

Jub's Head Canon

Octavia: Secretly living a double-life (preferably as a closet pervert or hitman for the mob).

Lyra: Not-so-secretly fucking Octavia and being awesome at whatever else she's doing at the time.

Bon-Bon: Perpetual victim of spousal abuse.

Vinyl Scratch: Vinyl who now?

Roseluck: Sociopathic vigilante.

Lily: Dead.

Daisy: Also dead.

Carrot Top: Loveable fuckup.

Berry Punch: Jaded detective with a hilarious past.

Derpy: Lobotomized chauffeur for Manehattan criminals.

Filthy Rich: Notorious mobster.

Aunt and Uncle Orange: Notorious-er mobsters.

CMC: Controversial postmodern, avant garde, hipster heavy metal rock band (whatever the fuck that means).

Junebug: Drug dealer with a bad stu-stu-stutter.

Thunderlane: Getting his dick sucked by changelings in shady nightclubs.

Tracy Flash: World's most capable voyeur (yes she's a background pony, not an OC, look her up).

Mare-Do-Well: Yes, Please.

Stories that are called Jub by myself as well as others

  • Sweet Apple Acres: A Love StoryA short, absurd, and nonsensical story about a certain farm girl.2,966 words ·751 views ·30 likes ·4 dislikes
  • M for Mare-Do-WellPipsqueak runs into trouble on his way home, but is saved by a daring, albeit a bit odd hero.1,120 words ·1,665 views ·66 likes ·1 dislikes

Commissions Anyone?

Attention all fans of my sexy fight fics! As you may already know from my blog posts I'm available for commissions. And since I have this info posted on a dozen other sites, I figured I might as well throw it up on Fim too.

I charge a flat rate $25-30 dollars, depending on the size of the job. But you're in luck, because I'm in the first week of my Back-To-School Sale, which means all fics are going for the low, low price of $15  during the month of September. :pinkiehappy:

Shoot me a PM with the details of your request, and I'll see what I can do for you. Also, PM me if you'd like links to my other non-pony commissions.

Places that I call Jub


#1416730 · 15h, 33m ago · · ·


I like the way you think. Maybe I'll write something along those lines if I ever find the time.

#1415250 · 1d, 3h ago · · ·

I like your head canon for Octavia. Notably the second one. I certainly wouldn't be too far against it if you made a story about Mafia Octy. Really, I wouldn't.

#1295716 · 7w, 6d ago · 1 · ·


Yeah... You too, man.

#1295715 · 7w, 6d ago · 1 · ·

>>1295711 Well, at least five of my stories got a new commentless downvote sometime in the past couple hours, which is highly annoying, but it happens to all of us I suppose, so C'est la vie, I guess. Just got an idea for yet another changeling fic, about to see where it leads me.

Have a great day! :pinkiehappy:

#1295711 · 7w, 6d ago · 1 · ·


I'm good, thanks. And yourself?

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My favs that I call Jub


Epiphany · 3:45am

The blog post is called Epiphany because I just had one. After writing lots of smut on the interwebs for lots interesting and unique and filthy, filthy people, I've conceded to a truth I once violently opposed.

Smut is better with a good story.

There. I said it, and I'm not saying again. And I don't want to read any smart ass remarks in the comment section, either.

Now leave me alone. I got work needs doin'.


theycallmejub · 86 views · Edited 2w, 6d ago · Report