You've heard what happens when you give a mouse a cookie, you've heard what happens when you give a moose a muffin, and you've heard what happens when you give a pig a pancake. But when you give a pony a pretzel, prepare for mayhem, because you know what?

That's exactly what you get.

Warning.

The following fic was pulled out of my ass in the span of about an hour. As per the comedy tag, it isn't meant to be taken seriously at all.

Viewer discretion is advised.

Rated teen for language and cartoon violence.

Ever wondered what would happen if the Heavy's Sandvich from Team Fortress Two was teleported to Equestria and gained a mind of it's own based on the Sandvich's experience with his minigun toting comrade? I did and this story was born! Yay! Enjoy or don't, the choice is yours.

Rated teen for one scene of minor gore and one or two uses of foul language.

And as always, constructive criticism is welcome...even if this isn't my most serious fic ever.

Image from: http://wiki.teamfortress.com/wiki/File:Backpack_Sandvich.png

EDIT: Ran over the thing, added a little bit and fixed some grammar errors.