You know what really sucks? Love sucks. I thought I had found the woman that would make me happy, and she made me happier than I had ever thought I could be. She was everything I had wanted and more, and she 'loved' me back just as much as I loved her, or at least that was what I thought. I legitimately wanted to settle down with her later on, and I was hoping the same from her because that was the way she seemed to act about it. I loved her, and I gave her my everything, my all, even took the entirety of my defenses down just to let her in. After some time, some great days (or at least what I thought were great days) she left me... and she just expects me to move on like nothing ever happened and find someone else to love me and for me to love them back as well. She doesn't even want to talk to me anymore, and she was really the only one I had ever trusted with telling most of my life stories and even admitting things I wouldn't admit to others should they ask me about it.
I miss her... so very much even though it is tearing me apart from the inside... and I can't put myself to let her go. I don't know why I can't; I guess I'm just hoping she'll come running back to me, someday, and love me once again...