You guys know why I chose trying to kill myself through hypothermia? Because I thought that if I died freezing to death, hell would have been a lot better than without such a fate.
Well, the title says it all. With the shedding of a solitary tear, I am done with writing. For a very, very, very long time, at least, if not forever. Ever since Bad_Seed cancelled our nearly completed collab and shutting me out of the sequel, wasting literally two and half months of my life (I actually held off on getting a civilian job after I left the Army to write it), removing one of the things that had been helping me get over my PTSD and depression, and throwing my over the edge, I no longer have the will to write. I've tried numerous times. I'd go on, look at the screen for a few seconds, then close out the window and just lie in my bed, staring up at the wall.
I can't do it, guys. And for that, I'm sorry.
While I love each and everyone of you guys for sticking with me till the very end, there are a few people I want to personally make a shout-out to.
John - You were a great pre-reader and editor. I haven't talked to you in months, but still, I wish you the best. Feel free to PM this account anytime if you wanna chat.
Regidar - You're fucking awesome, bro. You deserve some pussy. Thanks for hearing out my random, shitty story ideas. PM me sometime.
Inspectah Dash - You've been a good friend to me, and you were fun to collab with. Don't worry about me quitting writing. I'll finish up our collabs before I officially leave, if you're up to it. Thank you for helping me with my issues. Contact me whenever you wanna caht.
Zarius - Another friend of mine I've gotten to know a bit when me and Will wrote the original Haylo. Good luck with your spin-offs. I'm certain that Will will take over where I left off on Haylo: A New World remastered, so watch out for that. If you ever wanna chat, feel free to PM me.
The Athiest Brony - hey bby. Still craving that cock, eh sailor? I keed. You're pretty chill. I miss talking with you, as you always kept me entertained. PM anytime you need someone to shoot the shit with, or a dick to fill your ass with.
Silverstein - For a member of the Chair Force, you're pretty cool. Part of me thinks you're just a soldier who was steered the wrong way. Whatever. You're a chill guy. I remember you mentioning you being stationed in Cali. If you plan on going to EQLA, my little bro is supposed to be on a writers panel. PM me if you're not too busy. I enjoy our conversations.
Camo Flash - You're like my bro on that one chat that both you and me went on. I'm a bit jealous of the fact you got mod before me. But I'm happy you're happy there. I'll stop by and visit every so often. Though my brother is using my xat account now. Feel free to PM me if you wanna chat or if you want to beg me to come on the chat.
Bad_Seed_72 - You may have wasted the past two months of my life. You may have basically turned your back on me. You may pushed me over the edge when you knew damn well that I was going through depression. You may have made me want to stop writing for good. You may have made me try to kill myself. You may have been what is causing me to still wonder if I should continue to live or try to end it, successfully the next time around. I may hate your guys. I may never want to speak to you. Your name and any mention of Severed Roots may make me feel depressed and make me want to punch a hole in the wall. But you were my friend. And I did care for you. You are a good writer, as well. One of the best I've met. Maybe on the other side, if I'm not burning in hell for what I've done in my past, we can be friends again. But for now, I can't stand the thought of talking with you. Any attempts I've tried to repair our damaged relationship has ended in rejection, so I'm assuming you feel the same way.
I apologize to anyone I missed. I love each and everyone of you, regardless of who you are or what you are like. Thank you for sticking with me until the end. And to my brothers-in-arms who are reading this, keep being awesome. That's what we're best at.
Until next time...
See you later, space cowboys.