It's like one week into the hiatus and already it's killing me. Or has it been two weeks? I don't even know man! I'm just curious as to what you guys are doing to pass the time until more pones. If you guys can suggest some shit to do I would be grateful...meanwhile, for anyone else in need of suggestions here's a list of shit I've been doing:

-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-watching the season 2 finale. Pretty much every night...and I still cry every goddamn time. At the end when Shining tries to perform his spell and he can't, and then Cadance says "My love will give you strength!" I fucking lose my fucking shit every fucking time. Goddamnit I'm such a raging faggot.

-Vodka

-Bruno Mars-tonight I was dancing in my front yard while listening to "locked out of heaven" (more than a few drinks deep) and and a car that was going by actually stopped for about 45 seconds. They were definitely looking at me. I didn't skip a beat. The spaghetti was rocketing out of my pockets.

-/mlp/

-thinking up story ideas and then not writing them ever.

-today I discovered the "Monster High" cartoon shorts. I actually like them. I think this is a new level of sperg for me but at this point I don't even care. Link for anyone who wants it http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lAgTxx1dkGo

-praying Equestria Girls wont suck. New pic btw:

-Fluffy ponies

-waiting for my plushie

-Re-reading all of Zel's blog posts

-Furry hunting

-Jimmy Dean breakfast sandwiches

-re-watching episodes of Jack Reacts

That pretty much covers everything. Any ideas guys?

Just verifying my identity for some nor/mlp/person, please disregard.

It's too cash to post as an actual story so I will leave it here:

Busta Rhymes meets Rainb0w Dash

Busta Rhymes: Yo yo yo yo! Yo yo yoooooooooooo yo!

RAinbow dsh: OMG! It's Busta Rhymes!

Busta: Hey r8Bow dash wut are u doin?

Rainbow: I was just washing my cunt!

Busta: That's super neat! Now it's time for the D!

Rambo Dash: What's that?

Busta reveals the D.

Rainbow: ME GUSTA!

Busta cums inside rainbow dash.

Busta: WOOOOOHAAAAAA!

Rainbow: I feel like an eclair! Full of cream with chocolate on top of me! OH NO! Busta! It's Crazy Larry!

Busta: Oh shit time to bounce!

Busta turns into a seraphim and he and rainbow fly off into the sunset.

Crazy Larry: Hey Busta boy where'd ya go?!

Busta: WINNNCHACHACHACHACHA!!!!!

Fin

In other news, I'm drunk.

So...

     What are your thoughts on pone finale? Personally I thinks things went a hell of a lot better than expected. I had faith that it would be dece but not necessarily that it would be good, and I was pleasantly surprised. They actually managed to fit seven songs in 22 minutes, I feel like Twilicorn wasn't overplayed, they actually said "Alicorn" in the show for the first time [Edit: Derp! Alicorn amulet assclown!] which, for some reason, was immensely satisfying, music was good...like, really damn good in my opinion. I especially really loved Twilight's little "I've Got to Find a Way" song, that piano intro got me. And Celestia sang! I loved Rarity's outfit in the last scene, I couldn't believe she was wearing a reasonably sized hat this time. I would've liked to have seen Twilight spazzing out a little bit more about her new princessness, but it just wasn't that kind of episode...I'm sure we'll get plenty OCD Twi in season four. Anyway, all in all 'twas good. This was the first episode for a while that gave me legit feels. I watched it three times and I think I cried more each time. Is it just me or did it have a kind of season one-esque innocence to it?

     So yeah...if you were ambivalent about watching, I'm putting my stamp of approval on this one. Granted I'm easily satisfied, but I really think this episode was great and finale-worthy. The only thing I'm sad about is that season three is over, but I'm not too sad since season four is all but confirmed, we just have to bide our time. That and EG is premiering sometime this spring. For all my doomsaying and autism about it, I'm actually curious as to whether or not they'll pull it off. After all, I was kind of meh about FiM when I was first introduced to the idea, but I got hooked after one episode, so maybe EG will surprise me...stranger things have happened. So yeah, that's my jimmy status at the moment: Satisfied with Twilicorn episode, looking forward to season four, and cautiously optimistic about EG. Oh yeah, and really stoked about my plushie. Can't forget that.

Anyway, would love to hear your opinions.

>tfw the highlight of you v-day is a six pack of malt liquor and a bowl of chili

>tfw you haven't had sex in 7 years (how many years before I'm a virgin again?)

>tfw you can't even cuddle your Rarity plushie because she doesn't ship for another 19 days.

I'm having some feels guys, and they ain't so good...anyone wanna cheer meh up?

MUAHAHAHA and you all thought I was being a typical alarmist...it's real my chil'ren, and it's headed right for us.

http://www.equestriadaily.com/2013/02/mlp-spin-off-series-confirmed-rumor.html

I found out about this like three hours ago on /mlp/ but I waited until EQD posted it because who the fuck would believe me if I linked a 4chan thread?

Say hello to our six new friends: Handjob Dash, Statutory, Twilight Spunkhole, Pedo Pie, Applejackoff, and uh...girl with severe jaundice...

Anyway the second most important thing this proves is that FiM will have a spinoff series.

The MOST important thing this proves is that I am always right.

Anyway I'm heading back to shitstorm central for some good old fashioned doomsaying. Feel free to join me, it's the sticky thread at the top of /mlp/.

Goodnight you silly cunts

DWK

...hoping to god this isn't real.

     Yes, if you hang out on /mlp/ you've probably been through this skullfucking, but for those of you who can't pry yourselves away from fimfics I thought I'd share the scariest thing I've seen in a long time. The faglord known as Purple Tinker posted this supposedly leaked MLP movie thing on "her" blog...I don't have the heart to actually save that heinous picture and post it so I will linky.

Go ahead and punch yourselves in the nuts a few times, it dulls the pain.

     "But DWK, why are you giving this any credibility?" I wouldn't except it's coming from PT, who, despite being the assqueen of avalon, used to be in charge of Bronycon and has Hasbro connections. Granted Hasbro stabbed her in the back and for all we know she's just trolling the living fuck out of us and them, but something about this seems too stupid to be fake. I can take a no-Rarity-episode-season...I can take Twilicorn...but an entire movie of humanized ponies...punch me in the vagina. Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to go drink and chainsmoke myself to an early grave...tell my waifu I love her.

-You know who

Faggots and gentlecunts,

     Before you read on, get a load of THIS bullshit.

Since most of you are lazy, illiterate, or some combo thereof, here's the tl;dr: I'm a bronay and ahm surry, we're ruining Faust's creative vision and by appropriating the show we're destroying the impact it was supposed to have for little girls. I'm dealing with some serious incredulity at the moment so I'll let Rarity speak for me:

Okay, just for starters, when was the last time you heard your little sister/daughter/little girl you're molesting say "oh no I can't watch my little pony because the neckbeards ruined it!"

     Those of you who know me well know that I'm not a very opinionated guy save for when it comes to who is best pony (pic related) or how scootaloo should be tortured, but every once in a while something pisses me off to such a degree that I feel the need to express it (usually when I get rejected from EQD). This one's a little different, however. It's this self loathing that some bronies feel that is expressed in the aformentioned article - this feeling that we're taking something that doesn't belong to us, that we're imposing masculinity on something inherently feminine and in so doing we're destroying it. Cry me a fucking river. I didn't start watching this show because I could justify it as manly, I started watching it because deep down (or not so deep down some might say) I'm a girly little faggot and I'm not the least bit ashamed to say so. I mean am I just totally fucking off my rocker and don't realize it? Is the brony philosophy really that marshmallow horses exploring the meaning of friendchips is somehow manly? Are there bronies that aren't unapologetic nerds, because I'm sure as hell not saying sorry to anyone. Are there really bronies out there who operate under the delusion that watching a little girls' show can somehow be incorporated into an image of masculinity? We shouldn't be trying to make the show something that it's not, we should be loving it for what it is, right? We should be changing our sense of self to incorporate our love of ponies, not changing ponies to fit in snugly with our existing self-image.

     Then there's this idea that we're destroying Faust's work somehow, this "subtext" - as the author refers to it - to her comments about the fandom that says she's disheartened by the whole thing. Stop speculating for christ's sake. You're not making inferences, you're not discovering hidden meanings, you are taking shots in the pitch fucking dark. The day Lauren Faust comes out and says she hates bronies is the day I apologize. Until then you aren't getting shit. Waxing philosophical about what someone MIGHT be feeling and then getting all sad about does nobody any good.

     Finally the stupidest point this article tries to make is that we're somehow ruining the impact that the show is supposed to have for its target audience. Let me spin you a little yarn. When I was but a lad I loved to watch Batman: The Animated Series (hence my massive Harleyboner). Did I care that the show had an adult fanbase? No. Was I even AWARE the show had an adult fanbase? No. I understand the internet exists and therefore lots of little girls probably know about bronies, but what makes you think they give a flying fuck? I don't see how our fandom relates in anyway to the younger audience besides the fact that we all love the show. If someone can give me a logical explanation as to how we are destroying this for little girls I will throw down my arms and fucking leave. Until that happens, I am a brony and I'm not the least bit sorry. Thoughts?

DWK

Hey you sillies,

     Damn, looks like FiMfics got a facelift in my absence. And the TWE got bombed, holy shit. So much drama, it's delicious. And it seems I've acquired a few more followers. Hello new followers! And Wrath, you finally finished Chocolate Frosting! You get all my lulz. Anyway, I'm still alive if anyone was wondering (probablynot.jpeg), I just haven't been doing much internets. I had to get one of those jobby things so I could like, have money and food and that kinda stuff. I'm too lazy to do anything with my website and my Dashie Abuse blog, but I do have a new story in the works, so keep an eye out. I'm planning a grand return to FiMfics. Oh yeah and I'll finish Crazy Pastel Pony World one of these days. Ooh! A Fun Day! garnered its 300th dislike! Is that a record? Eh, most likely not, but not bad imho. Anyway, I don't actually have much to say, just that I do in fact still exist and I plan on making a comeback soon. Anyway, it's my birthday so I'm gonna go get obliterated and do something stupid.

     Hit 'em up (yeah I still listen to Tupac),

     DWK

Hey y'all,

     Sorry I haven't been around much lately, but work has been hell and I'm concentrating on my tumblr right now, that actually being the purpose of this post. Dashie Abuse has been updated. I made it a super nasty one since I made you guys wait so long. Anyway, for those of you who follow it, go see little dashie get the shit beaten out of her. If you haven't already checked it out, please do...unless you don't like gore, then I wouldn't go there. Anyway, I hope everyone is having fun in my absence and I hope to resume writing in a few weeks (suggestions are appreciated). And don't forget to submit your abuse suggestions on my tumblr!

     Toodles,

     DWK