1. Member Since 28th Dec, 2011
  2. offline for 28w, 5d

Crushric, n. — A narcissistic masochist, a Southern gentleman, and snarky smartass. If you're looking for someone to disappoint you, he won't disappoint you.

Wherein I monger my wares

  • T The Lady Wore Red

    Like a stallion terrified of having children, they pulled me out of retirement. I was the best Special Agent they had, which was saying a lot, because I'm about as effective at my job as a mime having a stroke, and only half as hilarious.  · Crushric
    10,026 words · 1,589 views  ·  152  ·  5 · sex
  • T Jericho

    If you came to hear a story, I'm sorry to disappoint. I suspect this'll just end up as one big confession, really. Still, with enough wit, some Prussian ingenuity, a droll sense of humor, and wanton murder, I might just be able to survive.  · Crushric
    545,769 words · 10,655 views  ·  776  ·  63 · gore

Iron, Cold Iron · 7:22am

Gold is for the mistress — silver for the maid —

Copper for the craftsman cunning at his trade.

"Good!" said the Baron, sitting in his hall,

"But Iron — Cold Iron — is master of them all."

— Rudyard Kipling, "Cold Iron."

Hello, everyone. I thought I should make a blogpost about what I've been up to lately, for them what are curious. I did some Jericho, and then I once again vanished. Well, the reason that happened was because I got annoyed as the zero advancement my novel project, Phoenix Fire, was having, so I decided to dick around with some Jericho again.

Then, a Christmas day miracle happened (two weeks ago). I scrapped all of my work on my novel, and started from scratch once more. A fresh start, two weeks, and 29k words later, and I and the editorial staff thing this edition might be the one. The story is now nigh unrecognizable, but remains a dark comedy adventure with a familiar certain (unnamed) narrator. It takes a lot of influence from the Calêrhos arc of Jericho, as well as my token brand of humor.

If you want a slight spoiler, here's the current summary for Phoenix Fire, then here it is in 20 words. A fanatical Prussian Luddite travels to post-apocalyptic America to destroy the supercomputer secretly ruling the cursed city of Misery.

Plus, as you may or may not know, there's a certain ponyfic out there which I've treated in Jericho with a mix of affectionate parody and taking the piss out of. I mostly used Cards as a vessel for mocking it. SuperAngstyPone, I no like you! Anyhow, though I might have a love-hate relation with that story (mostly its characters!), I decided to pick up the maxim of "if you don't like a book, write you own". Like with the butchering of Sleepy Oaks in Jericho, you'll no doubt see me fux with some ideas I liked from the story, but hated in execution or presentation or lack of implication or just something where I felt there was wasted potential. And then expand this to fit my idea of the world. So that by the end, how I've done therewith has an "oh yeah, that sounds familiar" feel thereto, only now possesses a whole new direction.

This is technically called homage, I understand. Though I still like to think of it as "no, no, no! Here's how it should have been!"

Now then, I've got to get back to documenting the intellectual decline of the West. This way I can point to and tell my grandkids exactly when this country started going to shit. I'm prepping for being an angry old man early! It turns out, nothing ever is good! Abandon ship!

*cough* Er, I mean, just thought y'all people might like to know what I'm up to.

Report Crushric · 229 views ·
  • Viewing 93 - 102 of 102
#102 · 11h, 54m ago · · ·

A tasty metal song if (:fluttercry:) Jericho ever comes back:

The Eagle Has Landed - Avatar

Oooh wahahaha!

What a sensation!

What a sensation!

Can you feel it?

Can you see what I see?

A crowning of lights.

The lights!

Ladies and gentlemen,

Your hero has returned again!

Everything is going to be okay-ay-ay-ay!

#101 · 20w, 1d ago · 1 · ·

Hey, I just wanted you to know that I'm looking forward to Phoenix Fire. I loved reading Jericho, so I'm sure that what comes of (more or less) him in another setting will be just as good. Cheers!

#100 · 39w, 1d ago · 1 · ·

Jericho is kill. Again.

#99 · 76w, 2d ago · · ·


Glaube, Liebe, Tod by Oomph!

Huh. I think I remember looking up Oomph! on Youtube after Jericho described the cover back in chapter 18, but I do not remember much of it.

What is amusing is that half my co-workers on the production floor like various flavours of country music and the other half like metal. All those Dark Country albums were a nice compromise/fustion between the two genres. I will definitely mention Oomph! to the metal guys and gals...

#98 · 76w, 5d ago · · ·


It's a family-friendly yogurt joint with locations ranging from Nova Scotia to Turkey. I've eaten at one near Atlanta.

#97 · 76w, 5d ago · · ·


Welp. We're screwed

Say goodbye to the wife and kids

Pray tell, where did you find this thing?

#95 · 76w, 6d ago · · ·


If you wanted a hard fact, it in my mind the logo on his shirt was the album cover from Glaube, Liebe, Tod by Oomph!.

It was just a design I'm oddly fond off, despite it's minimalist appearance.

Now then, where was I in Phoenix Fire?

#94 · 76w, 6d ago · · ·

Something random, apropos of nothing...

a black shirt advocating a band I was fond of

Chapter 17 — Mud

I pointed to the three symbols lined up horizontally across the black shirt

Chapter 18 — Drown

Heroes Dress In Black by Blues Saraceno

(The Dark Country / Gothic Country theme of that CD and the preceding 2 before it fit pretty well with Jericho IMHO)

#93 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·


For the record, I agree with the consensus. All adventures need a wide-eyed idiot who can have what's happening around them explained by the professional adventurer.

  • Viewing 93 - 102 of 102
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