For me, getting drunk is about hilarity.

You see, I never do psychoactive drugs. And I never will most likely. So instead I like to think really strange thoughts and/or get drunk to give myself some cheap laughs and philosophical fortification with friends a kick-start.

For example, after wrestling with Johnny Walker Black at a friend's house and losing myself to a glorious waking stupor, I began to suddenly speak in the third person the rest of the evening. At a bar we went to later that night, this exchange happened:

Cute Girl: So, do you like living in Coeur d' Alene?

Me: Clayton likes this place very well. In fact if Clayton had anything bad to say about it, it would be that there is a winter and it comes most fiercely to this area. But it is not something Clayton worries about much.

Cute Girl:... I need to find my friend Kelly...

She scurried off as I poured Alaskan ale in my face and my friends began snickering.

Or another time, I spoke in the ROYAL CANTERLOT VOICE at people all night at a bowling alley.

Clayton: WE FIND THIS PLACE MOST PLEASURABLE, ALLIES AND COMPATRIOTS OF MINE PERSON! IF THOU HAS THE TIME TO DO SO AND THE BITS, FETCH US ANOTHER DESCHUTES BLACK BUTTE PORTER! IT TASTES LIKE LIQUID DRAGONFLAME!

Friend: What the fuck is wrong with you!?

Clayton: WE ARE UNAWARE OF ANYTHING AMISS, ART THOU REFERRING TO MY DECIDED LACK OF A NEW ALCOHOLIC BEVERAGE!?

Also I have woken up in/on the following places:

- A public beach.

- A tree about twenty feet up in it. Seriously I slept drunk in A TREE. Like a chimpanzee or something.

Fortunately, I drink mostly to laugh at the stupid shit I do while drunk. And that is enjoyment, and if your life isn't enjoyable, why are you living it?

Anyways, pointless post is pointless.