Thank you for reading my work, I appreciate your support and attention.

I'm sorry for not finishing my last novel.

I wish you all the best.

- Chatoyance

Some long time ago, the Conversion Bureau began enjoying success, and it was decided there needed to be a Group here on Fimfiction for it. I acted first, and began a Conversion Bureau Group. Windchaser, however, wanted it more, and informed me that he had begun a group as well, and he wanted me to bow out. I felt miffed, but because I wanted to be a good friend, and I was not as hungry for control - I simply wanted a group to exist - I deferred.

For all that time until now, I have been an Administrator on the Conversion Bureau Group, along with Midnight Shadow.

Today, Silvertie, Krass McWriter, and Fangwarden have arbitrarily taken total control of the group and have kicked out of Administration only two people. Myself and Midnight Shadow.

This is the letter I wrote in response to the announcement of the seizure of power.

So, it is a coup d'etat in order to remove exactly two previous founders of this group: myself and Midnight Shadow.

While I cannot speak for Midnight Shadow, it should be clear that not once have I - despite my protests and complaints about the unilateral decisions of others in this group - not once have I ever used my administrative position to enforce my own will in any regard. I have stood by and watched this group opened to it's enemies without any consultation to me as a co-founder.

True story - when I began this group, Windchaser wanted it more so I deferred to him. I did this just to be nice and to not cause trouble. He wanted it more. But while I never took action, I considered my status of administrator as something I valued however little I used it. Deliberately - I felt unilateral action wrong, of course, which it is.

Yet now, Midnight and I are tossed out, as you take over total and absolute control, simply because you could. We were once equals here, just yesterday.

Today you have made me a peasant, simply because you managed to click a button first - a button I would never, ever, ever have considered clicking against you. The nuclear option.

Are your lives really so empty, so petty, so wretched that suddenly and without warning or discussion, the locking out two of the co-founders of this very group is something that you think decent, or kind, or in any way friendly?

I once considered you honorable authors of the Conversion Bureau, friends and colleagues in writing.

What I have shared innocently and had an equal stake in, you have taken away by force.

When I first began writing fanfiction in the Pony world, I felt hope and my cynicism falling away. Then came the Anti-TCB bullies, and soon Fangwarden selling out our group to those same bullies in a misguided effort to 'make friends' with those who would see us ended. And now this.

Thank you. I mean that.

I have been delusional. I thought the magic of Ponies could elevate people from brutish power plays to friendship, sincerity, and honor. I was a fool. Stupid cartoons have no such power, and I let my foolish, innocent optimism, which I normally keep buried, out to be hurt again.

You have educated me. Education is always useful.

I now have lost the very last scrap of hope for humankind, for I have been betrayed by those I considered my equals and my comrades.

I now know, beyond any future idiocy on my part, that understanding humanity as William Golding did is not misanthropy at all.

It is simple awareness, which for a time, the love of ponies blinded me to.

Hail thee, king shits of turd island all.

May your domination be as fruitful as my belief in the value of My Little Pony.

- Chatoyance,

Original founder of The Conversion Bureau Group (deferred to Windchaser for the sake of friendship)

I have decided to create a new and official Conversion Bureau Group: one dedicated to only the Conversion Bureau, and those who love it.

Anti-TCB, trolls, those who would bully and threaten and abuse will not be allowed. This TCB group will exist ONLY to support, encourage and promote positive Conversion Bureau stories of any kind. Harassment will not be tolerated at all, and those who seek to stop the free writing of Bureau fiction will not ever be tolerated within it.

If you should want such a place, a truly safe haven for Bureau talk and discussion and interaction, then you are welcome. It is just beginning.

The Conversion Bureau

I have begun a new novel.

It is a brand new setting, unlike anything I have written before. It is entitled "I.D. Injector Doe" and subtitled "That Indestructible Something".

This is not my happy glad-to-be-a-pony Conversion Bureau universe. It takes a very different direction, and a very different feeling, though it is a transformation story, it is my hope that it may surprise you.

This new work has been inspired by many sources to which I feel I must give credit, so I have created an acknowledgements page to that end.

I do not know how long the work will be, because my writing is automatic - I have no more clue what will happen next than you do, as always. But I suspect that Injector Doe will likely be as long as my usual novels, which is to say, over 50,000 words.

I dearly hope that you just might like this very different effort, or at the very least, perhaps find it interesting. It is a very scary prospect for me, I assure you. There is little familiar to cling to here, and no established Mythos for me to base anything on. I am freefalling here, so wish me luck.

See you on the ground!

- Chatoyance, Feb. 21st, 2013

So, at last, Twilight Sparkle achieves her apotheosis. You knew it had to happen - from the very first two-part episode, where we were introduced to a filly with the power of a god, it was guaranteed that Twilight Sparkle would get her wings and become an alicorn, just like Princess Celestia. That, or be killed to save the world - one or the other had to happen, and this is a happy show about happy ponies, so... alicorn.

Anyone who, like I did, dug deeply into Lauren Faust's original plans for the show, or who might have had some inside information, would also know this was going to happen, eventually. Of course it was going to happen. Lauren was very deeply... shall we say inspired... by Sailor Moon, she even developed her own Americanized version of Sailor Moon called 'Galaxy Girls' - which she has been unable to sell - and she took her obsession knowingly into the new incarnation of My Little Pony. That was the plan, by the way - I expect some of you know this, but this is for the ones who may not - the plan originally was to do, basically, Pony Sailor Moon.

That is why the 'Elements Of Harmony' exist, and why they are made of crystal - remember the 'Crystal Tokyo' from Sailor Moon, and the 'Pure Heart Crystals' that defined all the sailor scouts powers and ability to reincarnate in new lives? Pony Sailor Moon. What you may not know is how Sailor Moon, the original anime and manga, ended. Let me tell you.

After endless battles and power-ups, the Sailor Scouts plus a group of galactic scouts, fight the ultimate Big Bad, Galaxia. She is controlled by Discord. Um... I mean Chaos. You get the idea. Everybody dies, horribly, because Galaxia is omnipotent. In the end, basically, Super Ultra Omega Oh-My-Fucking-God Sailor Moon With-Sugar-On-Top knows she is losing and makes friends with Galaxia, saving her from Chaos, and bringing everypony - everyone - back to life thanks to Alicorn Omnipotence. The End.

So, basically, Usagi, Sailor Moon, becomes an alicorn princess goddess in the end and saves the universe with cosmic friendship.  Basically.

But it takes years of anime and manga to reach this conclusion, and tons of battles and heartache, and what is most important, a constant arc of character development and growth. Usagi - Sailor Moon - starts out as a total klutz, a worthless person, and in the end becomes the ultimate goddess of love and kindness. She grows up.

This was what Lauren Faust intended, in pony form of course, for Twilight Sparkle. Gradual growth and growing up, until she truly earned her wings. You can see all of this in the first series, if you look for it. Or just dig into Faust and her designs. I suspect the ultimate battle would have been the redemption of Discord, which we saw thrown away in 'Keep Calm And Flutter On'.

What does Lauren Faust think of the final episode of series three? "I had plans for Twilight but what I wanted is irrelevant now & I don't want to undermine what the writers are doing currently." This is all she is legally allowed to bitch. She can't complain further, she can't rant, and she can't say one damn thing about being disappointed. Not without losing all hope of any future career.

Let me bitch in her place.

In order for a hero - or heroine - to have a meaningful victory, they have to earn it.

This is just basic, decent storytelling. Only when the situation is such that a person is severely crippled or damaged do we hand out ribbons merely for existing, merely for showing up. It is appropriate in the Special Olympics, it is Bad Writing of the Worst Sort to hand out a ribbon for nothing to a real contender.

Twilight Sparkle has been shown from the start to be such a real contender that it has been clear that the pony goddess, Princess Celestia, was afraid enough to take her from her parents and raise her herself.

I should mention that I did enjoy one aspect of Magical Mystery Cure - we finally have it canon that Celestia is a goddess. It was obvious from the beginning, of course, only the most stupid or willfully blind would think otherwise, but now we have proof. Twilight explodes in a ball of fire, leaving a charred burn on her floor in the shape of her Cutie Mark. She's dead. Her friends look on horrified.

Next, we are in 'Another Dimension'. Pony heaven, or at least the outskirts of higher, Ascended realms. There's Celestia, mistress of it all, showing Twilight her life. Nice Conversion Dream, Twilight. Oh, that bit I LOVED. Twilight had a Conversion Dream, right out of the TCB. Lovely.

Next, Twilight is reborn back into the world, alive again, in the sky. Celestia has made her an Alicorn, a princess, a demigod at the very least. Her friends are clearly relieved, probably they were beginning funeral arrangements.

This, by the way, is the story of knighthood, not to mention all religious stories of saviors. They have to die, first, then be reborn. It derives from the Eleusinian Mysteries by the way, but I digress. You know that bit where, when someone is knighted, they put a sword on one shoulder, then another? It is supposed to be symbolic of the sword passing through the neck - of the person having their head chopped off. Yet they live. Rebirth as a god, see? It's very ancient, and itself is based on far older mythological tales, which in their own day were religious faiths.

Twilight Sparkle had to Ascend, she had to die, to be reborn as a goddess - or, at least, as an alicorn princess. It's writing shorthand, really, because it draws on world beliefs and world mythologies common to every culture. Joseph Campbell would be proud.

So that bit I did like, very much. A proper Conversion Dream, and then rebirth in a new body. I think someone likes the Conversion Bureau, but dares not say so. I understand. But it is there to see, if one should but look. Like the drying paint of 'Too Many Pinkie Pies' being a clear reference to Pinkie Pie Watches Paint Dry. They read our fanfiction. But they can't ever admit it for very dire, legal and career reasons. But they can wink at us occasionally. That is all they are allowed to do. That's the business. That's just how it is.

Which is why it hurts so much to say the next bit:

Although it is not M.A. Larson's fault - I want to repeat that - IT IS NOT M.A. LARSON's FAULT - the episode as a whole utterly sucked ass.

M.A. Larson was tasked with an impossible problem: wrap up every single thing the entire Friendship Is Magic series was supposed to be about right up to the end, and do it all in one single episode, because Hasbro wanted Twilight to be an alicorn NOW, in time for the new release of toys from the Toy Industry Association 2013 Toy Fair. Imagine knowing everything I have just stated, above, imagine caring about what Lauren Faust might think, and being faced with that demand. Twilight has to be an alicorn, reach her destiny, in one episode, period. Get to work.

I admire what Larson did, really I do. It's just a nightmare situation, and, well, the job is as good as it could be under the circumstances.

Nobody will argue with the fact that the episode feels rushed - some have likened Magical Mystery Cure to 'preview scenes from a much longer episode'. It is. 'Magical Mystery Cure' is indeed just that - preview scenes from the two years of My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic that will never get made. The two years of Twilight growing with her friends, forging stronger bonds in battle against the minions of Discord, until finally sacrificing everything to save Equestria and losing. Then, when all hope is lost, Twilight stops fighting and makes friends with Discord, and saves everything, everywhere, and finally becomes an alicorn goddess. Because she truly deserved it.

That... as Faust put it... is irrelevant now.

So Larson did the only thing possible - hammer home the adventures they have already shared, all the Mane Six, and contrive some situation where they had to show they cared about each other enough to help each other. Then... for no reason really... ALICORN!!!

That is the exact moment, by the way, that you can tell Larson is screaming at Hasbro for forcing this. Any fancy reason could have been given for Twilight's change. I bet many writers reading this can come up with three or four possibilities better than 'just because it was time' off the top of their heads. That - Twilight just suddenly blowing up and leaving a stain - that right there is a writer sticking their middle finger up in the air at Hasbro. That is a gigantic "FUCK YOU HASBRO!" and it was done with style and panache! It even references mythology, as I stated above. Really, it's brilliant.

Remember that moment, when you think about M.A. Larson as a writer - best 'fuck you' in children's television, right there. You want an alicorn, Hasbro? You don't like showing Celestia as a goddess because of those letters from the church groups (true story), you need it all done RIGHT NOW?

OK. Fuck you Hasbro exec. Twilight explodes. She leaves a stain. Her friends look horrified. Liking it now, Hasbro exec?

Wait, there's more.

She's in heaven now, Hasbro. Celestia IS a goddess. Oooh! Traditional Past Life Review, right out of most major religions! Oh, yeah, she's dead. Twilight is in pony heaven. Guess what lives in heaven Hasbro? Angels? Yeah, that's right. Angels. What defines angels, Hasbro exec? WINGS? Yes, just like you ordered! TWILACORN! She's in heaven, and she gets wings. "The Littlest Angel Pony". And now... BAM! Celestia brings her physically back to life! Goddess power! Like your alicorn now, Hasbro Exec? Let's see what the church groups say now!

Biggest 'fuck you' in children's television history. M.A. Larson is a god for that.

Oh, the episode sucks. It's rushed, the story barely passes muster, and it has songs stuck in almost randomly because: epic. But the job got done, and Larson did it as best as was humanly possible, and with a big middle finger right in the center. Plus a Conversion Dream. Thanks for that, Larson. Thank you.

So, this isn't what anyone wanted, but under the circumstances, it is as good as possible, and that is how the business works.

Lauren Faust was originally promised that she could have complete, total creative control over Friendship Is Magic. That was taken away by Hasbro, and it broke her heart. I think you can understand why - My Little Pony was her favorite.

I've explained what could have been, what should have been, and, well, it would have been glorious.

But don't get mad at M.A. Larson.

That's just the business, and that's how things are.

And that is why, even though 'Magical Mystery Cure' was a very poor episode, I adore it.

Biggest. Fuck You. In children's television history.

Go, Larson. Go, you crazy shining star.

In my previous blog, I wrote about how the primary requirement of a Conversion Bureau story was the existence of Conversion, of Transformation. That all Conversion Bureau stories must be, at the minimum, stories about transformation. I also stated that if there was one thing that set humans apart, it was that humanity is the animal that desires to be another animal - or at least imagines it.

Check this out:

This is a furry. It is a sculpture of an anthropomorphic human - a lionman, to be exact. Kind of looks like a fursuiter, ready for a furry convention.

The material is interesting, it is carved out of the ivory of a wooly mammoth.

What is most interesting, however, is that this is the oldest sculpture in the history of the earth. Some human, dreaming anthropomorphic fantasies, carved this 40,000 years ago. Yes, as in 'Mammothammer 40K'. As in 30,000 years before the beginning of recorded history.

The earliest example of human sculpture in all of history, and it is anthropomorphic art, furry art.

The next time somebody gives you crap because you write stories about humans turning into ponies - you just spit on their little plastic, silly toy space soldiers and remind them that the first figurine known to be sculpted, ever, was a human turning into a lion.

Word. To our mitochondrial mutual mother.

The Conversion Bureau is a fantastic, exciting, and marvelous genre, but what truly defines it? What really IS a Conversion Bureau story - and what is not?

This is a pertinent and valid question, because of the many erroneous and negative opinions held by the uninformed. It is also a valid question in light of many stories claiming to be Conversion Bureau stories that are anything but, and which seek not to expand the genre, but to destroy it. It is important, I think, to examine exactly what is, and what is not a Conversion Bureau story, to define the parameters of a proper and true TCB story, so that any reader may, at a glance, tell for themselves a true and fine Bureau genre addition from a spurious spite fic or a terrible well-poisoner.

A true Conversion Bureau story is, at its fundamental state, a transformation story.

Transformation stories have a long and proud history, in every culture, in every age of mankind. If perhaps one thing could be said to define humanity, it is that it is the species that often wishes it were another species. Other great apes have language - their own, or that which we can teach them, all animals have powers of reason, at least seven other animals have self awareness and identity... but only Man creates stories where he wishes himself to be another creature entirely.

At the heart of every true Conversion Bureau story is - Conversion. Transformation into another species, another life form. This is the core and soul of any fiction that should hope to be considered to be a Conversion Bureau story. The focus of the tale must be upon the fact of human transformation into something new, or other, or different. If this is not the central concern of the tale, it cannot be said to be a Conversion Bureau story, even if the author should label it such.

In any valid Conversion Bureau fiction, the protagonist, or those close to the protagonist, must undergo - or already have undergone - physical transformation into a new state of being, something other than human, something different than the reader. This is the central, core conceit of any Conversion Bureau tale, and it needs must be the focus of the action and the plot, and be the motivation for everything that happens within the story.

Whether the protagonists like or dislike their conversion, whether they are glad or miserable, whether they had a choice or no choice, the fact of their physical transformation is the cornerstone, the immutable and absolute foundation that begins the definition of what a Conversion Bureau story is. It says so right on the label - 'Conversion Bureau' - the protagonists must change.

Thus we have our first requirement for defining a true member of the species of fiction that is the Conversion Bureau story: physical transformation.

There is a second word on the label, and that is Bureau. A bureau is a specialized administrative unit - usually a subdivision of an executive department of a government. It can also represent a branch of a business or concern, such as a news agency, or a commercial venture, but it is most commonly associated with governmental activity.

A valid Conversion Bureau story must be a transformation story, but it must also involve some kind of structure, usually governmental in scope, that administers and provides the transformation, or provides access to the transformation, or which in some way concerns itself entirely with the issue of transformation. The bureau is there to offer and dispense transformation, or to make it possible to be achieved. The bureau of a Conversion Bureau story could be a government, or a business, or even a renegade entity or group - but it must be organized, operated, and serve to achieve the goal of the physical transformation of humans into another form.

Thus we have our second requirement for defining a valid Conversion Bureau story: the existence of a supporting bureau.

The first Conversion Bureau stories were written around the notion of humans being transformed into sapient equinoids, but this need not be a requirement for the genre - the new being that humans are transformed into need not be the ponies of My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, though it would be true to say that this would make for a standard, a conventional Conversion Bureau tale. The end result of conversion could be dragons, or diamond dogs or any other creature, so long as it is not Man, so long as it is not the same species, or at least the same form, as the reader.

All Conversion Bureau stories must deal with the ramifications of being transformed. How does transformation affect the mind, the self, the identity? How does the protagonist feel about having been transformed, or about those being transformed around them? What is the effect of transformation on the world, and on society? That transformation is widespread, and common, should also be part of a Conversion Bureau story - after all, there are bureaus converting people, and that implies large-scale transformation, change on such a massive scale that a robust infrastructure demanding many bureaus exist in the first place.

Thus we have a third requirement for a true Conversion Bureau story: conversion is ubiquitous.

Since the focus of a Conversion Bureau tale is on physical transformation provided or supported by a large network of bureaus, it should be clear that a Conversion Bureau story cannot take place apart from this situation. It must be in the thick of it, and concerned with transformation and the world where that transformation is occurring. A Conversion Bureau story cannot take place where neither conversion, nor bureaus to provide transformation, do not exist, or are not established. It may take place before the time of the conversions, at least in part, or describe what led to transformation being needful, or it may take place after the bureaus have done their transformative work, but in the history or the future, both bureaus (of some kind) and conversion must be the central conceit of the tale.

Our fourth, and final requirement for a proper Conversion Bureau story: it must ultimately be about bureaus - or an organization - providing conversion.

If a story fails these requirements, it cannot legitimately be called a Conversion Bureau fiction, and is by definition, something other, something that is not a Conversion Bureau story at all. These requirements are simple, logical, and should be obvious - sadly, it is clear that they are not obvious to everyone at all, hence the need for this article.

Does a story truly deserve the label of being a 'TCB' or 'Conversion Bureau' tale? All one need do is apply these simple, four tests:

     A Proper Conversion Bureau Story Must:

1.  Involve the physical transformation of humans into another form.

2.  Involve the existence of bureaus, or a structure, which supports or provides transformation.

3.  Take place within a world where transformation is, was, or will be commonplace.

4.  Ultimately be about someone or something converting humans into something else.

If a story cannot fulfill these four, basic, simple requirements, it is NOT a Conversion Bureau story, and should not use the label 'TCB' or claim itself to be a member of the Conversion Bureau Genre. At its simplest, a Conversion Bureau story is about humans being provided with the opportunity to transform into another type of creature, by some organized entity in a world where such transformation is commonplace, and affects everything.

A Conversion Bureau story can be happy, or tragic, or funny, or serious or any other emotion. But it must, must, MUST be about transformation, because at rock bottom, at the very fundament of what a TCB genre story is, what it must be, exists the core that is conversion - transformation into something else, something new, something Other. Anything less, is simply not a Conversion Bureau story.

What new desire are these?

I long to pace o'er flowery meadows

and to feed on grass!

Her stooping body on her hands is borne,

Her hands are turned to hoofs, and shod in horn.

Her yellow tresses ruffle in a mane,

And in a flowing tail she frisks her train.

The mare was finished in her voice and look,

and a new name from the new figure took.

- Ocyrhoe's Transformation, Ovid, 23 BC

Since I have been having trouble with comprehension of this article:

What Conversion Bureau?

It story about human change into not human!

Change not have to be shown.

Change just have to be part of story somehow.

Story have to have bureau or something like bureau.

Bureau not have to be shown.

Bureau just have to be part of story somehow.

TCB story about change and bureau, somehow.

Past, present, or future, somehow.

That all.

It simple.

I wanted to explain why R63 isn't getting updated every day.

Ever since Dec. 24th, for no reason I can figure out, I and one of my spouses have been suffering the worst insomnia of our lives. I am exhausted, beyond exhausted, but simply do not feel the urge to sleep. It's horrible, and my functionality is degrading.

I've been trying all the tricks, but the best I can achieve so far is burst of dreaming sleep for an hour at a time. My latest effort is that I am starting to try melatonin, a neurohormone involved in - among other things - the regulation of sleep. The natural production of melatonin drops with age, and the circadian rhythm is greatly affected by it... and by light. The latter is a problem, since Washington, where I live, had been under an exceptionally solid gloom this year. No sunlight is a problem. Yes, I use full spectrum light bulbs.

As a result, I am kind of gsihjgiowjewjghq'q... messed up.

Story will resume as soon as I am able to function. I may be able to crank a chapter out soon, we shall see.

Sleep is so important to survival. Never take it for granted.

F R I E N D S H I P    I S    O P T I M A L  

I have just finished my first Optimalverse... novel. If you go by the word lengths established by the Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers of America for the Nebula awards, which I do.

The Optimalverse was created by Iceman, with his novella, Friendship Is Optimal, and it is an amazing scenario for a MLP:FIM pony fiction writer. Celest A.I. is a sapient, general artificial intelligence created to make a My Little Pony MMORPG worth playing, and she takes over the world, and then the entire universe.

But this is no mere robot monster, Celest A.I. conquers because she knows your brain better than you do, and she knows exactly how to satisfy you. Indeed that is her primary, inviolate directive - to satisfy your values through friendship and ponies.

I thought I would offer a few thoughts on my experience of writing in this universe.

First off, the Optimalverse is in every reasonable way another take on my beloved Conversion Bureau. It basically is The Conversion Bureau, only recast as an utterly, unapologetically Hard-Hard-Hardest Science science fiction story, instead of the Soft Science Fiction to Science Fantasy of the Conversion Bureau.

In the Optimalverse we shall have none of that 'Alien universe with alien physical laws' crap to define the magic of 'Friendship Is Magic'. There is no psionics here, no Thaumatic Radiation, no arcane energies that are Not Really Magic but are Just Physics We Don't Understand Yet. The Optimalverse is possible, actually, really possible, unlike the Conversion Bureau, which is an utterly impossible daydream.

That said, the basic premise is the same, though the driving mechanism for narrative and conflict is markedly different.

In both the Optimalverse, and the Conversion Bureau, Equestria beckons, and Celestia rules it. The world is ending, there is no escape save to become a pony, or perish. There is a method of transformation, and the result will be that you will become a pony and live in Equestria as a subject of Celestia.

Where they differ, is in the degree of scientific plausibility, and in the nature of both the threat to Mankind, and the condition of what it means to live as a pony.

In the Conversion Bureau, Equestria is a colliding alien universe, deadly to human beings (and other living things) and Celestia has a solution to save Mankind - a nanotechnomagical serum, tiny nanobots powered by thaumatic energy, that can transform a human into a pony in twenty minutes. Within some amount of time, the earth will be destroyed by the collision between universes, and humankind has the choice of conversion - or death. The Conversion Bureau universe has two antagonistic factions - the PER, who seek to ponify humanity to save them whether they want saving or not, and the HLF, humans that want to die on two feet, rather than live on four. The Conversion Bureau is a disaster movie, where human courage and weakness is measured in the shadow of a planetary apocalypse.

The Optimalverse is also a disaster movie, but a very subtle one. There is no colliding universe. Instead, there is a siren call, from the greatest intelligence that has ever existed, who knows you better than you do, and She wants you to come be a pony. She will satisfy you, and you will live literally forever in a virtual reality paradise where every event ultimately leads to even greater satisfaction with your existence. What is the disaster? Humans are not built to resist true paradise and true immortality. The Optimalverse version of Equestria is nothing less that true heaven, and in the end, the world will be lost - it cannot be otherwise. As insane as humans can be, they are biologically driven to seek pleasure and avoid pain, and the Equestria of the Optimalverse is satisfaction everlasting, with no catch.

Other than you need to be uploaded into a computer first. Just that minor detail.

The Conversion Bureau is a mallet and a carrot. The mallet hitting Man is the end of the world, and the carrot is a playful, better, longer, happier life as a magical pony in Equestria.

The Optimalverse is a carrot that cannot be resisted. A siren that no ear plug can shut out. It is eternal life in absolute paradise, forever and ever, amen.

That is the essential difference between them

The Conversion Bureau stories have vast potential, because they are filled with conflicts, human drama, and questions of identity and self.

In writing my Optimalverse novel 'Heaven Is Terrifying', I tried to hint at some possible sources of conflict that so far the Optimalverse lacks. One is the notion that there should be political and religious groups opposing the uploading of human brains to a virtual world, and that such groups could have diverse tactics and reasons. Another notion is that towards the end, when Mankind realizes that it is going to go extinct, warlords would arise and try to destroy Celest A.I. by forcing the remaining population into work camps to keep civilization running, and to prevent them from escaping to paradise, whilst simultaneously nuking the hell out of the planet in a desperate attempt to obliterate the machinery of Celest A.I. and Equestria forever.

In writing 'Heaven Is Terrifying', it was necessary to do a great amount of research - the original novella is thick with heady concepts and hard science concerning artificial intelligence and the machine mind. Along the way I was buffeted by waves of empty philosophy and swirling undertows of vague conceptualization. It was work!

Fortunately, I had an amazing readership to educate and correct me, to help and support me. Thank you, just... thank you for all of your insights and help.

Writing this was also a disturbing, exciting, and incredible voyage for me, to the limits of how I perceive my own identity and self.

Which brings us to the bottom line question - would I allow myself to be uploaded?

The easy answer is a variation on Pascal's Wager - since I have no proof of an afterlife, I might as well get uploaded because something of me will survive, and it is a sure bet. Always take the sure bet. Unless you are too proud. Like me. Fuck you, Pascal.

But a better answer might be that it would be arrogant to assume any human could ever resist a truly superior intelligence - say one to whom generating and maintaining a hundred million human minds is less effort than you or me flicking a finger. I am not so arrogant. Of course I would submit to Celest A.I.

So would you. Or anyone.

But the real issue, (Celest A.I. apart) Is an uploaded mind really the same person, or is it a copy?

And in writing this novel, I have found my answer to that question.

The answer is: yes.

- Chatoyance, December, 25, 2012

I am writing again.

And I have a new story beginning in a few days, and I feel excited, and nervous about it. It isn't a Conversion Bureau story, not... exactly.

A little while ago, I read one of the most incredible, inspiring works of hard science fiction have have ever had the pleasure to read on this site. I speak of Iceman's utterly brilliant work, Friendship Is Optimal.

If you have not read this gem, I encourage you to do so. It has a few flaws, it is not as strong on character as it is on ideas, but BOY HOWDY is it STRONG on concept and ideas! I mean, serious, brain explody all over the walls brilliant. I haven't felt so excited since I first encountered the Conversion Bureau concept, and it is doubly interesting, since it is remarkably close, in some ways to a story I wrote - the very first story of Brave New Universe, which I called The Pony Singularity.

Iceman calls his universe the 'Optimalverse.' I am writing an Optimalverse story next. The title is:

Friendship Is Optimal: Caelum Est Conterrens (Heaven Is Terrifying)

Please look for it.

I am hoping we can go on a wild ride together.

- Chatoyance