Anon somehow got teleported to a magic world, random
You are Anon, a normal human from a normal world, some day out of nowhere you are not quite in your world anymore. Talking magic horses everywhere you can see, somehow now you are talking with the rulers and goddesses of this world, welp, this will be interesting.
You know that little voice inside your head that is always there, doesn't matter if you are happy, sad, angry or feel anything at all.
It's always there, just lingering in your mind, the doubt, a strong and annoying feeling.
Why do I feel it you may ask, well, it's been 3 years since I simply was yanked out of my world and got here in this weird magical horse land, in a little town called ponyville I think, a purple pony with wings and a horn approached me and simply talked, yeah, imagine my face when I discovered that those ponies not only talked but could also fly and do magic, REAL MAGIC.
Anyway, her name was Twilight and apparently, she was the princess of friendship? How can you be a princess of a concept beats me.
She just made some questions and wrote a letter to someone, or if you may somepony heh, I chuckled at that not gonna lie.
Anyway, the letter was for a pony called Celestia, basically the god of ponies and their ruler.
And well, she was, something alright, regal, white as snow, a mane that flows with.... uhh... nothing? Look, physics isn't my cup of tea, but I'm certain that hair can't flow like that.
Well, after some small talk she decided to get me to the royal castle in Canterlot, it's not like a I had a choice, so I just accepted.
There she explained to me the basics of this world and how she wasn't really all that surprised to see a human, apparently, she has a mirror that sends ponies to another another dimension with humans, mind you, not my dimension, cause apparently their people can be pink.
But still, it's a human world, and even though she wasn't supposed to use that mirror she did a couple of times, got to know how the human society works.
After some hours, in the evening, she told me to meet her sister, a pony called Luna, another goddess and ruler of their world, and she can move the moon, oh yeah, I kinda forgot to mention how Celestia moves the sun and Luna the moon, no, I didn't dare to question it.
Well, Luna was, for a lack of a better word, cold, distant even.
Late at night I couldn't sleep, I was always a night type of person but usually I could sleep well, maybe the shock of being in another world finally set in, so I just decided to walk around the castle until I feel sleepy, after a couple of minutes I met Luna in the throne room.... alone.
I decided to talk to her.
"Hi, your majesty" I said quietly.
"Oh, Anon, I wasn't expecting you to be awake this late" Luna responded regally.
"Well, I was supposed to, but sleep just left my body without a message, maybe it finally settled that I just got sucked in another world without even saying goodbye to my friends and family" I said grimly.
"I see, to be honest, we, I mean, I can relate to that, it's not really the same thing, but I was banished to the moon for a thousand years, and just 2 years ago I came back, and things were, different, almost like I was not in the world I knew anymore" Wait, a thousand years? I couldn't believe that, but she said with so much conviction and sadness, that I just believed it.
"Huh, so we both are kinda outcasts of this world" I said with a chuckle.
"Also, why were you so grumpy earlier? Not to be rude or anything, but back then you were cold and distant, but now, you ware sweet and caring" I said shooting her with a confused look.
She makes a grumpy face, cute.
"Well, you would also be grumpy when you don't get your full time of sleep for 3 days straight, and also, I don't know how to act around my sister" she said while her grumpy face turned into a sad one.
"After a thousand years away from her, I kinda forgot how we talked to each other, not only that but she is different from back then" she took a quick pause to take a deep breath.
"Even after 3 years since my return, I feel like she still has some resentment for what I did" Taking a couple of minutes to collect my thoughts, I simply chuckled.
"Have you even talked to her about this? I mean, for sure she misses you, after we meet she apologized a lot because of your grumpy mood, saying things like "she isn't like that usually" or "I'm so sorry for your first impression of Lulu being that", and after that she banged her head on a wall for a good 5 minutes for telling me your secret nickname " I said with a cheeky smirk on my face.
"So, Lulu, have you ever talked to her about how you feel?" A wide smirk on my face, teasing a goddess, what a wild ride.
"First thing, call me Lulu again and I will crush your skull" she said with eyes that seemed to stare my soul, took all my might to not wet myself.
"Second, no, I haven't talked to her about it, our schedules make it almost impossible to do so" The face she was making is almost unreadable, looks like a mix of regret and sadness.
"Wait, you two never had a break? It's the whole year working nonstop? Now I'm not surprised why you two seem so tired and well, grumpy".
This is unbelievable, the rulers and technically the gods of this land never had a break, I can only imagine how much stress these two have gathered along the years.
"We can't leave our ponies without our guidance or protection, they need us to be there when the time comes" she said so royally that I remembered that right know I'm talking to a princess, how did I even forget that? It's not like I know her, this is the first time I meet her, technically the second.
"Even just a day once a week? Don't they have the royal guard for protection, the elements of harmony, and well, 2 other princesses? I mean, I don't know the other one, but Twilight seems nice, a little too nerdy, but she seems like a god woman".
"Pardon?" Luna said with confusion on her face.
"What? Did I say something wrong?"
"Well, not really, at least I don't think so, but what's that woman thing you were talking about?". A questioning look on her face.
Oh yeah, only Celestia and Twilight know about humans, ponies don't really know about how we talk.
"Oh yeah, sorry, I forgot that you don't know anything about humans, well, a woman would be the same as a mare in here, and a man the same as a colt" I explained to her.
"Ah, I see, but still, I don't know if the guard or Twilight is up for the task, she has only been a princess for a couple months at most, she is not ready for something like that".
"Doesn't hurt to try does it? I mean, make a test, for a month you and Celestia will overwatch her as she takes your places in the Sunday".
"I will consider it, but we have a more pressing matter on our hoof right now".
"And what would that be?" I shot a curious glare at her.
"You". She said almost emotionless.
"Me? What do you mean?" A feeling of dread came to me, I'm not sure why though, these ponies seem nice, they wouldn't do anything to me right.... right?
"Well, you see, you don't belong in this world, but until further notice you will live here for the time being, we are not even certain if we could send you back to your world safely" A short pause came, she was apparently thinking of what to say next.
"We would like to give you a choice, you seem like a good colt, I mean, man, and quite knowledgeable"
"And what would that choice be?" A curious look was on my face, this is actually quite interesting, if one of the princesses is actually complimenting me, that kinda felt good.
"The choice is simple, you can chose a town, any town, of our land to live, we would give you a house and enough bits to live for a couple of months while you search for a job, you would live a normal life, well, as normal as it could be with you being from another world" Interesting, this seems like a good deal, but what's the other option?
"What's the other option?"
"You could live here, in the castle" Hold up, this seems like a trap.
"And what's the catch?" I deadpanned.
"What do you mean my dear human" Luna said trying to do puppy eyes, jokes on you, that doesn't work on me!
"I mean, living in a giant castle? With food, a bed, and everything else for free? Yeah, I don't bite it" Luna clicked her tongue, a frustrated look on her face, seems that I dodged a bullet here.
"You are way more cunning that I thought" Luna sighed.
"The catch would be that you would need to work in the castle" Well thar doesn't sound too bad, cleaning is easy peasy, I'm quite decent on the kitchen, and thank God that my father was a soldier, his training would come in handy here.
"Hm, work here on the castle? Doesn't sound that bad, what would I even do though?"
"Simple, you would help me and my sister with our daily, or nightly in my case, chores!" She said with so much excitement, almost like a child who got what she wanted on Christmas.
And what would that chores be?" I asked a little annoyed, sure work directly to the princesses could be nice, but that also means that I would be working almost 24/7.
"Oh, nothing too serious, just helping us to deal with some nobles, guarantee that we are on schedule, make us take a break or two during the day, and helpusdecidesomenewlaws" she said the last part so fast and quietly that I didn't understand.
"What did you say in that last part?" I said worried.
"Oh, nothing important" she said with a fake smile on her face, she didn't learn the first time.
"Luna, are you really trying to trick me again?" She blushed and shook her head like those bubbly head car decorations, it's kinda cute to be honest.
"No, never, I just...." a heavy sigh left her.
"As part of your work, you will need to help us with laws of the land, we need help mainly with laws about other species in equestria" A tinge of guilt on her expression.
"Unfortunately, me and my sister don't really know what to do regarding them, we want to befriend other species, but we fought so many wars with them that we can't be impartial with them".
"I see.... I will be completely honest with you here princess, I'm not the right person or pony for this, I have no knowledge about politics, economics and stuff like that, but..."
"I can try, the other species problem I already have some ideas actually".
"SPLENDID! WE SHALL WELCOME YOU WITH OPEN HOOVES MY FRIEND ANON!" I think that I have gone deaf, how can a little horse pack so much punch with their voice.
"Oh, we are so sorry, we didn't mean to use our royal Canterlot voice on thee" she said almost as worried as my mom was when I broke a bone for the first time.
"Don't worry, the ringing is almost stopping.... I think." I can barely hear her.
Out of nowhere a golden light appeared and as quickly as it did it also disappeared, and now a tall withe pony with a teddy bear or her wings took it place.
"Dear Lulu, can I ask you why in Tartarus are you using the royal Canterlot voice at 2 and a half in the morning?" Oh god, Celestia seems pissed.
"We are so sor-"
"Dialect Luna" Celestia intervened
"I'm so sorry dear sister, I couldn't control myself, our dead friend here accepted my offer to work with us to make equestria a better place for other species!" Why does a black horse seem so cute when excited.
"Excuse me, what?" Oh shit.
"Hey, look at the time, it was nice talking to you Luna, but I think that I will hit the hay now, bye" I rushed to the door, almost leaving, but then, a golden aura surrounded me and pulled me back.
"Oh, you won't mister, we have a lot to talk about"
So, it seems that they don't want me dead, for now at least.
But Celestia doesn't seem so happy with the news.
"Luna, why would you hire someone you barely know to help us rule our kingdom?" Celestia said with a disappointed tone to her voice.
"Sister, this human is a kind soul, after our talk I got to let out a side of myself I couldn't bring out for hundreds of years, I know what I'm doing" Luna responded pouting like a small child, cute.
Celestia sighed and looked at me, her eyes burning with distrust, then she looked back at her sister.
"Luna, you know that we can't just blindly trust some pony just like that, you know how change-" Celestia stopped abruptly, almost like something just clicked on her mind.
"Um, Celestia, are you alright?" I asked, worried... mostly about myself.
"Anon, can I ask you a question?" Celestia said coldly, man, I don't wanna die now, I just turned 20, I still have a lot to live for.
"I mean, you just asked one, but sure, go on" I laughed nervously, that try to lighten the mood worked as well as using a sunglasses at night.
"Do you know what changelings are?" A changeling? Is that some type of food? Doesn't sound tasty though.
"No, I don't know what a changeling is" I said honestly, can't lie about something you never heard about.
Celestia simply hummed, doesn't seem like she believed me.
"I see, you know, changelings are vile creatures, they feed on love energy, they can change their looks to perfectly mimic some pony, even the voice, their queen, Chrysalis, is especially dangerous, she can do everything the others can, but she is also as powerful as me with enough love energy, she can brainwash others, and who knows what more" Celestia said grimly, with a tinge of rage and disgust.
But wow, these things sound dangerous, and a full meal to paranoic people, but one question still stands on my mind, why is the telling me this? Surely, she doesn't think that I'm one of those right?
Oh fuck.
"Celestia, what are you implying?" Luna asked, she is looking at me like how you look at a child who did something wrong.
"Oh, my little moonlight, nothing really, just that maybe this little human here, might be queen Chrysalis herself." Yep, my end is near, I had a good life, I had.... wait, my life was shit, I don't want to die a loser.
"Now wait a second, how would I be that queen you are talking about if you just said that only you, Twilight and that Sunset Shimmer knows about humans? How would Chrysalis know about them?" I'm beyond sweating now, I don't think I have water on my body anymore, if I don't get smited here, I will probably die of dehydration.
"Fair point, but we don't know much about the changelings, we don't know if they have spies on our castles, or in other worlds for that matter." Man, how the hell will I get away here.
"Isn't there a way to check if he is a changeling or not sister?" Thank God that Luna is here.
"Well, maybe Twilight might have found a way to do so, but I don't know any, from what I remember, they turn back to their original form if they are hit hard enough, we can try that!" Ah hell nah, I'm not getting zapped or bucked into oblivion, fuck that.
"You know what, fuck this shit" Then I started running for my dear life, without success of course, Celestia just grabbed me with her magic, again, this is bullshit.
"Come on my little human, no need to use those horrible words, we will just give you a little zap, you won't die (small text) at least I think so (small text)".
"What" Both me and Luna asked at the same time.
Then, Celestia zapped me, and it hurt, like a lot, it's almost as bad as a taser, actually it's worse than a taser, I blacked out.
I woke up the next morning, in the bedroom they gave me for the night, my body was sore and my head hurts like hell, almost like I'm having the worst hangover of my life, oh, there is a letter on the bedside table.
"Dear Anon, I'm so sorry for what I did to you on our prior encounter, I would personally be there on your room when you woke up to apologize but duty calls, there should be a change of clothes right beside this letter, after you finish your morning routine, ask the guard on your door to take you directly to me.
Sincerely Princess of the Esquestria Diarchy, Celestia"
Well, that was something, might as well get ready for the day.
After 30 minutes of getting ready I take a glance on the letter again.
"A personal guard huh".
When I open the door, I see a royal violet pegasus mare with a sky blue mane with white stripes, she bares a stoic feature, same as every single guard on this castle, but now that I think about it, isn't every single guard here a white unicorn stallion? Weird.
Then she looks at me, with emerald green eyes, ok, those are beautiful.
"Hey there Anon, right?" I simply nod.
"The princess told me to be your personal guard while you stay here on the castle, at least for the day, I think that princess Luna chose one for the night shift, not really sure" She then takes a pause to exhale "Any questions you might have?"
"Just one, not to be rude or anything, but isn't every royal guard a white unicorn stallion?" She chuckles at that.
"Well, yes, that's why I'm not a royal guard silly human" she says whit a smirk.
"You are not?"
"Nope, I'm a member of the EUP, basically an elite military group of equestria" She then realizes something "Ah shit, I forgot to introduce myself"
"Captain Zephyr of the third pegasi branch of the EUP, at your service" She makes a salute with her wings. "Also, sorry for the bad language"
"Meh, don't worry about it, you can be yourself when we are alone, I also have a bad mouth problem, I just control myself around most people." She seemed to relax at that.
"Thanks, Celestia for that, to be honest I was a little worried you would be one of those stuck-up ponies who seems to have a stick up their asses all the time, but I see that you are one of my kind"
"Well then, let's get going, I need to talk to Celestia about some stuff that happened last night" I said almost tone deaf, I'm still mad about it.
"Seems that you had a tough first night here on the castle huh?"
"You could say that, was all fine until the sunbut princess came out of nowhere"
"Hey, watch your mouth, I might be a little less patriot than most of the guard but I'm still part of the military" she said with a relaxed tone, seems that she is just teasing.
"Keep that for when the princess is near hoof licker"
"Motherfu-"
"Oh, hey we reached the throne room"
"How do you even know? Isn't this your second day at the castle?" She said with a confused look on her face.
"I wondered here last night; I still remember how I got here"
Zephyr just sighed.
"Let's get this over with" I said determined to get some apologies.
I wasn’t prepared to see what I did when I opened that door.
Well, at least they can't call me a changeling anymore, since the queen is right there on Celestia throne.
"What's taking you so long to open a door?" Zephyr asks me opening the other half of the door, until she just stops with a shocked look on her muzzle.
"Not again" she says almost whining.
"What is that thing?" The changeling queen asks with a disgusted look pointing a hoof at me, rude.
"Hey, didn't your mom thought you that it's rude to point at others?" I said with a sarcastic tone and a smirk on my face.
"IT TALKS" Chrysalis said with genuine fear.
Man, I'm not that ugly, or am I?
"Stop right there criminal scum" said Zephyr hm, where have I heard that before?
"You broke several laws of equestria with your actions, surrender or you will face the consequences!" a brave face on her muzzle, but she doesn't look intimidating, actually, she is smaller than most ponies now that I take a look at her.
"You and what army little pest?" said Chrysalis with a snarl.
"I don't need an army to take you down foul creature!" welp, my respect for Zephyr suddenly vanished, how will a little pegasi defeat a creature who was able to defeat Celestia? One of the most powerful beings in this world.
But then she charged at Chrysalis, and immediately got shot by some kind of slime that made her a pony burrito.
"Congratulations genius, you really are one of the best soldiers I have even seen" I said sarcastically while slowly clapping my hand.
"Fuck off" was everything I got from her.
"Well then, now that this little pest got delt with, what in tartarus are you?" Again, with the pointing, really? Doesn't she have any manners at all?
"Well, I'm Anon, a human, a pleasure to meet you Chrysalis" this is going to be weird.
"A hyoo-man? I bever heard of such creatures my whole life! Stop lying already" Chrysalis said with a snarl, if she wasn't a bug pony, I would probably mistake her for a dog.
I sighed "Because I'm not really from this world you know? Somehow, I got here and can't go back, the princess you have there on that cocoon thing was hosting me, so, I will kindly ask you to give her back, please?"
"NEVER, my plan finally worked, now I'm the queen of all Equestria, and no one can stop me, NO ONE" a mad laughter echoed through the throne room.
"Look here bug lady, I just want to have a peaceful life for once, so I won't ask again, free up Celestia and everyone else" I said with a strict tone, that somehow made Chrysalis flinch.
"And what will a little pitiful hyoo-man like you would do" welp, time to get out the big guns.
I started running towards Chrysalis like a madman, she charged a magic bolt who I somehow was able to dodge, it was like that for a couple of minutes, until I was face to face with her.
"GET AWAY FROM ME YOU VILE THING" Chrysalis said shivering like a child after watching a horror movie.
"Will you free everyone?" I said in a serious tone.
"NEVER" was all she said.
"Then, face the consequences" Then I started to pet her.... what? What else am I supposed to do? From what I heard friendship and shit is the most powerful thing here, it's worth a shot.
"You have got to be fucking with me" I hear Zephyr say on my back.
"What are you doing?" Chrysalis asked.
"Petting you" I deadpanned.
"Stop"
"No"
This was a back and forth for around, 15 minutes or so, until she got annoyed, and seemingly pleased with what just happened.
"Ok fine I will get them all out" she said pouting.
"Finally" I said triumphantly, so is stooped petting her.
"WHO SAID YOU COULD STOP" and now I'm petting her again.
"I will get them out, but with a couple of conditions" oh boy, here we go.
"I can't promise anything, but sure, go on"
"First, I want to live in the castle, in the same room as you" excuse me, what the fuck?
"Second, you will always be at my side" the fuck?
"Third, I want my little changelings to be equestrian citizen" at least this one makes sense.
"And lastly, I want YOU to be my colt friend" I want to die.
"Hold the fuck on, the first and third one sure, I can probably talk Celestia out, but be your colt friend? I barely know you for fuck's sake" I said annoyed with all of this.
"But you petted me" Chrysalis said with her ears folding back, couldn't hear what she said, but damn, this was cute.
"What did you say there?" I simply asked.
"NOTHING" she took a deep breath "Fine, I will do your way, I will conquer your love by myself!" She said proudly, fuck, now I will have a bug horse lady trying to get into my pants.
"Whatever, just let everyone out"
After a couple of minutes everyone was freed from their cocoons, Celestia pulled me to the side and asked.
" I don't know what you did, but well done, now I just have to get her off guard" Celestia almost snarled.
"Can't let you do that princess" I said disappointed with myself.
"What?"
"I kind of promised her some stuff".
5 minutes of boring explanation later, and a room that is probably around 40 degrees Celsius right now, Celestia simply said.
"Fine, we will do your way, BUT you will be with during all of the talk about changeling citizenship"
God damnit.
After a few hours of explaining the whole castle including a pissed Luna that almost blew off half of the castle grounds, we four are sited in a round table facing each other in silence for the past 20 minutes, at least they aren’t trying to kill each other.
The silence was broken by Luna of all ponies.
“We can’t let you and your changeling roam like you ware before in equestria, we will need laws and rules for our species to cooperate” Luna is right, the changelings have some powerful magic that we can’t ignore, transforming into other creatures is too dangerous to be free to use.
“Lay the rules both of you want us to follow, me and my future spouse will evaluate them” I hate this already, at least Luna and Celestia chose to ignore that part.
“First of, no changing into other creatur-”
“No” Chrysalis interrupted Celestia, this will be a long meeting.
“What do you mean by No?” Celestia asked, not really pleased with the situation.
“How else are my changelings supposed to feed without that ability? We need to morph into other ponies to their love energy for us”
“That’s what we want to prevent, your race needs to get love energy by other means, maybe try to be friendly, some of our ponies might give love energy freely, we know about a certain changeling that is living with my niece on the crystal empire, he doesn’t need to feed of others” Celestia is actually trying to help Chrysalis, this is new.
A loud sigh could be heard from Chrysalis “Thorax, that little one was always a pain in the flank” she then took a pause to drink some water “But I see your point unfortunately, but this will be harder than there, most of the crystal ponies didn't even know about us, the only real problem was the pink one and her succul- I mean, spouse” The hell was that supposed to mean?
“I’m going to choose to ignore that last part, but we do see a problem on our approach, mainly here in Canterlot, ponies still hate your species for what you did in my niece wedding day” Celestia tapped a hoof on her chin “But I may have an idea, what you need is a positive view on changelings to overshadow your past actions, the problem is, what could you do?” The room, silent again, but not the angry silence from before, it’s the type of thinking silence.
“I might have an idea” I said after some time thinking.
“Well, share it with us” Celestia said.
“Well, the problem is that the past actions were a problem, right? And from what I was told from Chrysalis perspective, most of the reason behind that attack was the love shortage your hive had right?” I asked looking at Chrysalis.
“Yes, we had a pretty bad shortage of love energy at that time, we were able to stabilize it after a couple of weeks but still, changelings almost died of hunger because of it” Chrysalis said with a sad tone on her voice.
“Then, that’s your answer, make a public apology to canterlot citizens, tell your motives behind the actions, and say what you plan next, an integration between ponies and Changelings” after I got some weird looks, I simply add “Ponies seem to be chill, I mean, a weird creature appears in the middle of their town and they just welcome it with open hooves”
“You might be right Anon, our little ponies are quite forgiving creatures, look at our example, once we tried to conquer equestria and kill our sister, but they simply forgave me” Luna added with a warm smile.
“Thats our plan then, any problems with it Chrysalis?” after Celestia said those words we all look at Chrysalis, she simply shot us a fanged grin and said.
“It’s not perfect, but it might suffice, we changelings can be quite deceiving creatures, I might be able to make a fake apology that they will accept” she said proudly.
All other ponies and human, on the room smacked their hoofs or hand on their faces with a unanimous groan.
“What? I said something wrong?” Chrysalis is actually confused by this, well, who said that it would be this simple?