> Equestria 1/2. How Is This My Life? > by Autum Breeze > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > Prologue > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Equestria ½ How Is This My Life? Prologue ___________________________________________________________ I blink. Something feels… off. As my mind starts to catch up with my surroundings, I suddenly wish I’d remained oblivious, as I realize I’m falling from a stupidly high height. I’m maybe several thousand feet in the air, with some trees right in my line of sight. “SHIT!” I scream, glancing around frantically. How did I get here? Where am I? WHY AM I FALLING THROUGH THE AIR?! As the trees get closer and closer, as does the ground, I think I spot a branch that, if I can grab it, I might be able to at least stop my fall. I wait until the branch is close and reach out… before something very odd happens. Soon as I grab the branch, my body swings, as if on instinct. I let go of the branch, grabbing another and swing on that towards one further down, my body twisting so my feet make contact, my legs bending as if I’m readying to leap… and I do. I feel like I’m watching a move from a first person perspective as my body leaps and twists around, with my not even trying. Within less than a minute, I’m swinging down from the last branch and landing firming on my feet on the ground. I just stand there for several long moments, not moving, trying to figure out… What the bloody hell just happened? I glance up and find myself blanching. If I had to be a guess, I fell about three times the height of the Eiffel tower… yet I’m standing on the ground, not a scratch on me. “What in the world is going on… here?” I say, before wrapping a hand around my throat. “Whoa, what’s up with my voice? This isn’t my voice at all. And… what the heck happened to my body?!” Glancing down, I realize my body is not how I know it should be. I look… good. I mean, I’m not a bad looking person, but it’s not like I’m handsome either. I’m you’re average looking dude, if apparently looking like I’m ten years younger than I actually am, according to most people. Also… I am nowhere near this fit. Looking my body over, I’ve somehow got a really good muscle toned body. Nothing big or ridiculous, like a Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure character, but I’m definitely well-toned… but know I sure as shit wasn’t before. I’m not unhealthy or fat by any means, but I do have a bit of a stomach and a wee bit of flab on my arms. Or… at least, I used to? What the heck happened to me after…? After… I blink, before my blood runs cold. I don’t remember what I was last doing! I… I don’t even remember where I was or… or who I was. What the flying fuck’s going on around here? Suddenly, I feel something light land on my head and glance up, seeing some kind of envelope. Curious, I take it and open it, pulling out the contents, two sheets of paper being all that’s inside. Noticing one’s a letter, I read it. Hello, worthless mortal. I have chosen you for a higher calling. Aren’t you honoured? You are to fight in a war I am currently engaged in with a being I’m sure you would agree has no right to be questioning my righteous authority. As such, I have selected you for your tactical way of thinking and given you a form more suited to fight in my war, as it is from one of those television shows you enjoy. Should you choose to repay me for taking you from your pathetic existence and giving you a higher calling, as we know you will want to thank me for my boundless generosity, please sign on the dotted line. The list of your abilities are on the second form, as I’m sure your feeble mind isn’t powerful enough to remember them all. Master your new abilities and then join me in my righteous battle. Here’s to a valiant battle. Signed, Your (should you choose to accept me and we know you will) New God I ………., agree to fight in your righteous war and devote my entire being to your serve. I stare at the paper for several seconds, the meaning of what I read slowly processing through my brain… before I feel a pit of rage flare up within me, my face morphing into a snarl and I shred the letter. Are you fucking kidding me?! Some cosmic being just yeeted me out of my life and expects me to fight in some war they clearly started? What a fucking asshat! And, talk about contradictive! Says he chose me for my tactical way of thinking, that says I need a list of the abilities they gave me because I’d be too stupid to remember them? “Screw you, you piece of shit!” I shout, stomping on the tattered remains of the letter, pressing them into the dirt. After a few moments of twisting my foot over the remnants of the letter, I sigh, my anger spent and sit down on the grass. “What do I do now?” I ask, resting my head on my knees and looking down at the dirt. I don’t need someone to tell me, I’m clearly in another world. Glancing around, I don’t quite know what world I’m in, only that it’s clearly not mine. The air smells a lot different. I can’t really put my finger on what, but it’s different. Sighing, I decide I may as well see what abilities the asshat who brought me here gave me and pick the other sheet of the ground… only to wince. Whoops. Some dirt’s gotten on it and obscured some of words, so I can’t properly read them. Well, guess that’s what I get for letting my temper get the better of me. Sighing, I start reading what I can. You are now R…a Sa….me. You possess all t..s character’s abilities, including, but not limited to: The ……yo Curse Kenpo The Tenshin Amaguri-ken The Hiryuu Shouten-ha …..al ..ts Cheerleading Ma..l..t.. Rhythmic Gymnastics And… that’s about as far as I actually can read, as everything else is too smudged in dirt to read it besides a Couple letters here and there, none of them making sense since I can’t read the others next to them. I grumble. Great, so I don’t even get to know the abilities the asshat gave me. And he expected me to fight in a, I’m guessing, cosmic war with cheerleading and rhythmic gymnastics? Oh, and I’ve apparently got some kind of curse on me too. Again, how was I supposed to fight in this moron’s war while under the effects of a freaking curse? Sighing, I stand up, looking myself over again, moreover, my clothing. My memory may be foggy right now (no doubt a side effect of what the asshat did to me, the dick), but I do know these aren’t what I was wearing before I found myself falling through the air. Best I can tell, I’m wearing some kind of Chinese-style clothing, a red sleeveless shirt, dark blue pants and some kind of slip on black shoes. I rub my head, frowning as I feel a slight throb. I can’t quite remember, but this is familiar. I think I know who that asshat turned me into, but I can’t quite remember right now. And why in the word is my hair black and in a braided ponytail? Deciding to put it out of my mind, I look around my surrounding again, this time trying to spot any signs of civilisation. Once I find that, I should be able to figure something out. And it looks like I’d better hurry. There’s clearly rain headed this way. If I can’t find a settlement, I’d at least like to find shelter before that hits. Squinting, I think I see a dirt road through some trees and start in that direction. It doesn’t take long to reach the road and, seeing nothing of importance either right or left, I decide to just wing it and turn left. It’s about half an hour of walking later I hear a sound I recognize as a wagon moving along the road. It’s a plain brown, clearly not meant to look fancy on the outside. Outward appearance it clearly not the worry of the owner. Reaching the top of an incline quickly, I see that, indeed, there is a wagon moving in the opposite direction I’m going and I see two people on it. I’m about to call out, raising my hand, when I stop, something odd catching my eye. While there are two people there, I hadn’t notice something very odd til just now. They’re not both riding the wagon; one of them is pulling it, like a horse. He’s got a harness around his waist that is connecting him to the wagon and he’s pulling it along... and doesn’t seem the least bit bothered by the weight. But, that’s not all I notice. The one pulling the wagon, a tall man with a strong build, has deep blue skin and black hair. He’s wearing a simple, plain red farmer’s looking shirt and jeans. On his right shoulder is a tattoo of a pitchfork and a bale of hay. However, that’s not what makes his appearance odd. It’s the fact he has, best I can describe them, pony ears and a tail, the latter the same colour as the hair on his head and the former the same colour as his skin. The one sitting on the wagon isn’t any less strange in appearance. It’s a girl, of that I know for sure. She has skin a slightly lighter shade of blue than the man. She’s wearing a white tank top and jeans and, on her shoulder, the same shoulder as the man, she has a tattoo of a barrel fall of apples with lines that indicate it flying in the air, as if kicked. Her hair is a mop of disgustingly bright yellow, as is the tail next to her, her ears being the same as the man’s. What in the world kind of world did I get sent to? They kind of make me think of demihumans from Rising of the Shield Hero, but demihumans have normal human skin, not blue. And the girl barely looks like she’s out of her teens. Why would her parents let her have a tattoo at that age? Deciding I may as well bite the bullet, I put their odd appearances aside and hurry down the incline towards them, calling out, “Hey! Hey, you got a second?” The man pulling the wagon stops, himself and the girl glancing up as I jog down the road to reach them. “Howdy… sir?” the man says, looking slightly unsure as I reach them… suddenly aware the guy’s at least a foot taller than me and finding it very hard to ignore those huge muscles. “What might a… being like yourself be doin’ in these here parts?” I frown. “What do you mean “being”? I’m a human, pal. What, haven’t you heard of them before?” I barely finish the sentence before I see by his expression that he clearly hasn’t. The girl, however, has a look of recognition. “Wait. Didn’t a unicorn in the last town mention that word? Ah remember hearin’ it a couple o’ time ’efore we left Cousin AJ’s farm, pa.” I blink as what she said actually registers in my head. “A… unicorn?” I ask, my stone sceptical. The man nods. “Yeah. Ya know, unicorn? Look like us, less strong, those little nubby horns on their foreheads?” I turn and just stare at the guy… trying to figure out the joke. “Look like you? A unicorn? Dude, I don’t mean to disrespect your knowledge of biology, but unicorns aren’t bipeds like us. They’re quadrupeds.” The man frowns at me. “Son, you feelin’ alright? You bump yer head or sumthin’?” I’m about to answer him, when I think about the fall and the fact I’m clearly in another world. For all I know, maybe he’s right and unicorns are bipeds. I’ve watched anime with weirder fantasy world ideas, after all. “Um… maybe?” I say, putting a hand to my head. “It’s been a… weird day.” The man nods, indicating to the wagon. “Hop on in, son. We’ll get ya t’ the nearest town and ya can get checked up there.” Suddenly, I feel a drop hit my nose and look up as the rain starts falling. “Better hightail it,” the man says, putting a hand on my shoulder. “Don’t look like it’ll be a strong one, but best we not be out too long when the rain hits.” “Hope Cousin AJ won’t mind us stoppin’ by fer the night,” the girl says, giving the man, her father I’m now realizing, the stink eye as the rain starts to fall in earnest around us. “Granny told ya we’d never make it t’ the next town afore the rain came. But did ya listen to her, pa? Eenope. Yer just as stubborn as Granny herself.” “Alright, Apple Buck. Alright, Ah get it,” the man says, looking down to me as. “So, how’s about we… get… going?” The odd look he’s giving me isn’t lost on me. I know exactly why he’s giving it to me… though my brain is also not fully paying attention is it’s trying to process the feelings I’m experiencing. As the two were talking and the rain started, I felt something suddenly change about me. Something that… doesn’t make sense? I shakily raise my hands to my chest and feel it. Or, rather, the two fleshy mounds that have suddenly formed there. Ripping my shirt open, I gape at the two very obvious breasts now sitting on my chest. My heart skipping a beat, I reach down and feel for something… that I can’t find. “Wh-wha-what?” I murmur, lifting my hands at staring at them in disbelief. “I… I’ve turned into a… a girl?” How? What in the world could’ve turned me into a girl? And why now? Why wasn’t I turned into a girl when I first got sent to this world? What happened to turn me into a girl? The only thing that’s changed in the last half hour is… is… I slowly raise my head, looking up at the sky as rain conotues to pitter down. Cold rain. Wet rain. Cold water. Quickly reaching into my pocket, I pull out the paper from before, reading it over. Specifically, two parts. You are now R…a Sa….me. You possess all t..s character’s abilities, including, but not limited to: The ……yo Curse Have I…? Am I now… Ranma Saotome from the anime Ranma 1/2? > Chapter 1 > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Chapter 1 ___________________________________________________________ “We should be in Ponyville in a couple minutes Mr… um, Miss Saotome?” Hay Bale says from the front of the wagon. I don’t answer. I’m sitting with my hands around my knees inside the sparsely filled wagon, the young colt, sitting with an arm around me on one of the two simple mattresses used for sleeping. Yep, I said colt. Not only did I find out I’m in freaking Equestria, of all places, but the one I’d thought was a girl, Apple Buck, is actually just a very feminine looking colt. And, yes, I’m saying colt, not boy. Apparently, this Equestria is a humanlike Equestria, where ponies pretty much look like humans aside from the ears, tails and skin colour, with their Cutie Marks appearing on their right shoulder instead of their thighs and that unicorns have a tiny nub-like horns on their foreheads and the pegasi have wings on their backs. Not only that, but, according to my new traveling companions, despite the fact they all look human, ponies and other races that I’m guessing look human still refer to themselves as ponies, griffons, dragons, etc. All of that is hard enough to process without the knowledge that I’m now Ranma freaking Saotome and have his curse to boot. I’m still in girl form because, with the fact we’ll have to walk through the rain once we arrive at Sweet Apple Acres, there’s no point trying to boil some water to change me back… other than keeping my sanity in check, but that’s apparently not important enough. I explained things as best I could to my new traveling companions about my situation, about Ranma and the Jusenkyo Curse and how the character fell into the spring called Nyanniuchuan, Spring of Drowned Girl and how, now that I’m stuck as Ranma, I’m afflicted with the same curse. Apple Buck looks at me with confusion, before glancing down, clearly trying to choose his words carefully. “Is… Is it real?” I glance up at him half-heartedly. “Huh?” I ask, inwardly frowning as I hear girl type Ranma’s voice leaving my lips. Even after talking for a whole hour as I explained everything I could while Hay Bale took us back in the direction they’d been coming from when we met up, towards Ponyville, hearing that voice coming out my mouth still feels unsettling. Apple Buck, or Bucky for short, looks up. “Well, Ah was jus’ wonderin’… if’n those springs existed here, in Equestria, couldn’ ya just find one that could turn ya back int’ a... um, man fer good?” I stare at him for a moment, before giving a dry, bitter chuckle. “Ha. Nope. Wouldn’t work. Not only do I doubt Jusenkyo exists in this world, taking a dip in the Spring of Drowned Man or Boy wouldn’t rid me of this curse. I’d just be replacing one curse with another.” That was honestly one big flaw about Ranma ½ I never understood. Ranma and all the others cursed by the springs, at points every now and then would talk about going back to China to find the Springs of Drowned Man and Girl, so Ranma and the other men could return to permanent men and Shampoo, the only girl afflicted by the Junsenkyo Curse, could return to normal by curing their curses… even though that wouldn’t be the case at all. They’d literally just be trading the curses they already had for new ones. For Ranma and the men, they’d still not be normal. Whenever splashed with cold water, they’d turned into a completely different man. And the same with Shampoo. Whenever she would get splashed with cold water, sure, she wouldn’t turn into a cat, but she’d essentially change into a Shampoo version of girl type Ranma. So, with that in mind, I can’t end this curse, even if Jusenkyo is real in this world. “Oh,” I glance at Bucky at the dejected tone is his voice, seeing him looking down sadly at the floor. “That’s too bad.” I frown at him in confusion. “Why? Do you wanna jump in Nyanniuchuan?” He gives me an odd look, before seeming to remember what that meant and shakes his head. “Actually, Ah was hopin’ Ah could find a Spring o’ Drowned Stallion.” My confusion doubles. “You… lost me there, buddy.” Bucky indicates to himself. “When ya first met us, ya thought Ah was a filly. Everypony does. Ah don’t look like a colt nor sound like one. Never have. When I was born, the doctors didn’t even realize Ah was a colt at first.” I give a playful smirk. “What? Looking down below wasn’t enough proof for them?” He doesn’t smile back. “All my life, Ah’ve wan’ed t’ look like a colt. Pa’s ashamed o’ me. He don’t say it, but Ah know he is. He’d rather a son who looks like a son, not a daughter.” At once, I scowl. “Hey! Don’t go putting words in other people, um, ponies mouths!” He looks up at me as I stand, fists clenched. “Dads, real dads, love their children no matter what they look like!” I put a hand to my chest, wincing for a moment as I smush my breasts, before shaking it off and moving on. “From what I’ve seen of your father, he loves you just as you are, Bucky. He doesn’t care that you look more like a filly than a colt. All he cares about is you and your happiness.” Bucky looks to me with shock. I point at him. “Bucky, you looking like a filly is nothing to be ashamed off. I mean, you live in Equestria, for crying out loud. Mares outnumber stallions and are the freaking rulers. Do you think anypony would look down on the princesses if it turned out they were actually stallions who simply look like mares?” Bucky clearly think for a few moments, blushing, likely having just pictured the princesses as stallions, before shaking his head firmly. “Not in a million years.” I nod, holding up a fist. “Exactly. Here in Equestria, being a mare or mare like in appearance isn’t shunned like back in my world. It’s the norm. Anypony who says otherwise are the ones out of the norm, not you.” There’s silence for a moment, broken only by the sounds of the wagon as Hay Bale continuing to pull it up the road and the pitter patter of the rain. Bucky smiles up at me, nodding. “Thanks, urm… Ranma.” He says, hesitating for a moment. I shake my head, waving a hand as I move to sit down again. Try as I might, I can’t remember my real name. Whatever the being who sent me hear did, it erased my real name from my mind, leaving only Ranma in its place, so, Ranma it’ll have to be. The wagon suddenly stops and we move to the door, stepping out. Glancing around through the rain, the Brony in me is brimming with excitement as I look around at the picket fences, rows and rows of apple trees in the distance and the barn house before us. Hay Bale walks up to the front door, myself and Bucky hurrying over to join him. The door’s opened by a huge man, bigger than Hay Bale, wearing jeans and no shirt. Thankfully, from the red skin, green half an apple Cutie Mark on his right shoulder and blonde hair and tail, I can tell it’s Big Mac. The stallion sees who’s standing there and smirks. “Eeyup.” He moves aside, indicating for us to come in. Bucky and I share a snicker as Hay Bale sighs and we walk in. As I reach Big Mac, however, he cocks an eyebrow, it only just registering to me that I stand out like a sore thumb, especially since Big Mac would know I wasn’t with the other two before. “It’s… a long story,” I say. Big Mac nods and I go passed him. I don’t see where Hay Bale and Bucky go, but as I walk into the warm living room, I see a girl a year or two younger than I am sitting on a green rug, playing with a dog I recognize as Winona. It’s pretty obvious from the long red hair and tail, yellow skin and pink bow in her hair that it’s Apple Bloom. I was honestly expecting her to be wearing the same as her Equestria Girls counterpart, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. She’s wearing a pink shirt and a pair of jeans shorts. Judging by the lack of a Cutie Mark on her shoulder, I’m guessing I’m in an Equestria before Crusaders of the Lost Mark. Winona suddenly seems to notice me and barks excitedly, leaping out of Apple Bloom’s grip and running over to me. I lean down and scratch the dog behind the ears, giving a small smile. “Who’re you?” I look up as the yellow girl gets up and walks over, giving me a curious look. Inwardly sighing, I stand up, extending a hand. “Ranma Saotome. Pleased to meet you.” “Well, Miss Ranma, is it?” another voice interjects as we shake, causing us to glance to the stairs as a tall woman (mare, I really need to get that into my head) walks down them and towards us. Her skin’s a strong orange, her blonde mane and tail tied up. She’s wearing a plaid red and dark red shirt and jeans, a trio of apples on her shoulder. Her chest is pretty impressive. I don’t mean to look, but, it’s not like I can just not see them. She’s not as big as mine, humbling as I bet that must be, but there’s still decently sized. I take my hand back and rub my neck. “Honestly, I don’t know at this point. It’s probably best to refer to me as whatever form I’m in at the time.” Applejack nods, no doubt informed, if briefly, by Hay Bale or Bucky, though Apple Bloom gives a confused look between the two of us. Applejack nods, indicating upstairs with her thumb. “Go shower and then we’ll fix ya some grub. Ah left out a pair o’ mah old clothes fr’m when Ah was yer age.” I glance at Apple Bloom’s. She has to be in her early teens, so I can’t be much older than her, so why not lend me a spare of hers? I mean, I guess my chest would be too big, but, still, I find it odd AJ just assumed to give me a spare of her own instead of her sister’s. Deciding not to push it, I thank Applejack and head upstairs and start showering. The moment the hot water envelops me, I feel my body change. I’d spent so long as girl type Ranma, it actually takes me by surprise as I feel everything change and the sensations that follow. “This is going to take some getting used to,” I sigh, before getting to cleaning myself. Once I’m clean, I step out of the shower and reach for the pyjamas Applejack leant me, before I pause, glancing down at myself. Applejack leant me these with my girl type form in mind. Would they fit boy type? Sighing in annoyance, I get back into the shower and turn on the cold water, yelping as the cold water hits my skin, my voice changing mid yelp. I step back out, shivering slightly and quickly dry myself so I can put on the nightwear. Heading downstairs, I find Hay Bale and Bucky sitting at the table, a warm bowl of soup in front of each, along with a bowl clearly meant for me. “So, how do they… fit?” Apple Bloom’s voice makes me glance behind me, before looking down to my chest, which is straining against the buttoned shirt. “A… b-b-bit tight,” I say, my face beat red. “B-b-but it fits.” Considering how tight they are, it’s pretty clear now any Apple Bloom could have leant me definitely would not have fit. As we eat, Applejack asks me to give the full story and I do, to the of my best abilities. As I do, she gets an odd look of recognition in her eyes, but doesn’t elaborate when I ask. She simply tells me she’ll take me to speak with Twilight tomorrow, since the rain’s too bad now to go and it’s already close to evening anyway. I agree that that’s probably the best course of action right now. We can talk to Twilight, she’ll talk to Celestia and Celestia will probably be the best choice to find a way to send me back to my world, preferably as the old me instead of Ranma. > Chapter 2 > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Chapter 2 ___________________________________________________________ I look around, confused. I’m in some kind of void of blackness. How’d I get here? Turning around, I’m suddenly met by the sight of myself, except I’m boy type Ranma and I’m girl type Ranma. I’m somehow seeing from both perspectives. I can see girl type me in front of me and boy type me in front of me at the same time. “How’re you here?” I ask boy type me, pointing. “Me? How’re you here?” I ask girl type me, pointing back. Before I can answer, the ground suddenly starts shaking. “Whoa! What’s going on?” boy type me asks. “I-I don’t know!” girl type me asks. Suddenly, a massive shadow figure emerges from the ground beneath me, grabbing both me and me in one hand. The huge figure looms over us, red eyes glaring down from the inky black mass. You refused to fight for me? it booms. You dare refuse your new God?! I and myself glance at each other, faces a mask of fear. They found out I tore up the agreement letter? How? What’s he going to do to me now he knows?! “Enough!” a voice booms from nowhere. At once, the shadow figure dissipates and I fall to the ground, landing on boy type me. “Ouch!” I yell as girl type me crushes me underneath. “Mind getting off?” I do as boy type me asks, the two of us standing up and looking around. There’s a flash of deep blue light and our jaws literally hit to ground. Standing before me is one of the most beautiful women I’ve seen in my entire life. She’s tall, her chest higher than my own head, meaning I’m looking up quite a bit. Her skin’s a beautiful deep-blue. She’s wearing a deep-blue/black sleeveless dress that stops just before her knees, a blue jewel embedded just above her chest. On her feet are slippers similar in design as the glass ones from Disney’s Cinderella, though they look more like they’re made from sapphires than glass. On her right shoulder is a mass of inky black with a white crescent moon in front of it. Her mane and tail are both a mass of colours that look like the literal night sky, with stars to match, giving off a gentle easiness, the same feeling emanating from her bright blue eyes. On her forehead is a horn that reminds me of Twilight Sparkle’s from the first episodes. A bit long, maybe as long us my middle finger, but blunt looking, while, outstretched behind her, the same colour us her skin, are two feathered wings. At once, I bow. “P-P-Princess Luna!” “Rise, Ranma Saotome,” she says, her voice firm, yet extremely gentle. “You need not be so formal.” I rise, girl type me glancing around, frowning. “I’m dreaming, aren’t I?” Luna gives a small smile, her pony ears flicking. “Indeed. And, it is a good thing I found you.” “Whoa, wait. You mean that thing wasn’t just a dream, it was real?” boy type me asks. Luna shakes her head. “Yes and no. It was not real, but, had you fallen to it, it would have become so.” She frowns, eyeing me up and down. “Whatever the being was that sent you to our world and changed you, their influence is minor, unless given permission. Had you signed the contract given to you, they would have had full control over you and this world.” I didn’t know your blood could run cold in a dream, but I now know it can. “However,” Luna smirks, “by refusing to accept the “offer” that being was providing you, you have firmly locked this world and any bound to it out of their reach.” Bound to it? Is she talking about the EQG world? “That nightmare you were having was their last grip upon our world fading. A punishment set in place should any refuse, to ensure their compliance,” the deep-blue woman continues. “Had you indeed fallen to it, you would have been that being’s thrall until the end of time itself. Even death would not have freed you.” “But, since you got to it before that…?” boy type me asks. Luna nods. “Their influence upon our world is completely lost. You need never fear their retribution for your refusal to join in whatever war they wished of you.” I sigh with relief. “That’s a load off my mind.” “Your condition is an interesting one, though,” Luna passes her gaze over both girl type and boy type. “You are both stallion and mare. And not in those weirder senses from those graphic novels teen colts and fillies seem to enjoy so much these days.” I find my face going bright red. She’s talking about futa manga, so bluntly? Seriously, Princess Luna, what the actual fuck? You can’t just drop something like that in conversation as if you’re just talking about the weather. Suddenly, a sparkle enters her eyes and she claps her hands together excitedly. “Oh, but, this is perfect. Tia will be most pleased.” Uh, come again? “Now, I believe it is time you returned to the waking world, Ranma Saotome,” Luna says, reaching a hand out and— GRABBING MY LEFT BOOB?! ___________________________________________________________ “Luna,” I grumbling, trying to move away from the pressure on my chest. “No. I don’t… I don’t wanna…” “Wow. That’s firm. How come they’re bigger than mah big sis?” Wakefulness simultaneously is slow and slaps me in the face as I’m suddenly very aware that I’m laying on the couch I fell asleep on last night and a hand is definitely grabbing my left exposed breast. Snapping my eyes open, it’s to find Apple Bloom, wearing some kind of green nightgown with apple patterns, standing over me, her right hand firmly cupping my breast. I scowl. “Do you mind?!” She starts, backing up and laughs nervously. “Sorry. Ah was jus’ wonderin’ if’n those were real. Yer a little older than me, so it seemed kinda unreal yers could be so big.” I grumble again, sitting up and thrusting my shirt closed, buttoning it. “Well, now you know, they’re real. Happy?” The yellow girl looks away sheepishly. “You awake, Ranma?” Applejack’s voice calls from the kitchen. I sigh. “Yeah, now I am.” I get off the couch and make my way to the kitchen, Apple Bloom following a little bit behind. The table has four plates of pancakes, stacked three high each. There’s a jug of what I’m guessing to be maple syrup in the middle of the table. In front of each plate is a glass of what is obviously apple juice. “Have a good sleep?” Applejack asks as Big Mac walk in, a cup of steaming coffee in his right hand. “Somewhat.” I scowl at Apple Bloom. “At least until somepony decided to wake me up with a breast exam!” Applejack and Big Mac give their sister a none too pleased look and her ears splay back. She bows, apologizing again. I sigh and am about to accept her apology, when Big Mac seems to misplace his footing, tripping on a chair leg. His coffee goes flying into the air, aiming right for me. I thrust my arms in front of me, feeling the hot (but thankfully not so hot it would burn) drink wash over me, immediately feeling the switch from girl type to boy type, the shirt I’m wearing bursting open as its size isn't meant to accommodate a male chest of my size, the pants also becoming tighter. As I lower my arms, dripping with coffee, I see all three Apple siblings staring at me in shock. “Hay Bale and Bucky said it… but Ah didn’t really believe ’em til now,” Applejack looks me up and down. “Ya really can change between a colt and a filly, at will.” I sigh, shaking my head, both in answer and to get some of the coffee out of my eyes. “Not at will, per say. I can choose to change, but I would need to have the means to do so by splashing myself with either warm or cold water.” I look down at myself. “Or, any hot or cold liquid, I guess.” “Yer… yer a colt?” Apple Bloom asks in confusion. I open my mouth to replay, before hesitating. “Yes and no. “I’m kinda both, at least while stuck like this, anyway.” “Right,” Applejack says absentmindedly, before muttering, “Sweet Celestia, she’s gonna be floored when she finds out.” She must’ve thought I wouldn’t hear her, but I did. “When who finds out what?” Applejack looks to me and smiles. “Nothin’ t’ worry about fer now, Sugarcube. Go clean yerself up. We’ll have breakfast and head fer Twilight’s castle after that.” I move to leave, before something she said catches in my mind. Twilight’s caste? So, this is after the season 4 finale then. Damn. Knowing it’ll probably be a while before I can go home, I wouldn’t have objected, after figuring out how to use Ranma’s skills properly, to have tested them out on Tirek before he gained all the Alicorn Magic. Could’ve been fun and a nice distraction from the fact I’ve been taken away from my own world. ___________________________________________________________ “So, tell me again why you insisted I stay boy type after I got cleaned up?” I ask as Applejack and Apple Bloom lead me through Ponyville towards Twilight’s castle. Not that I needed directions to get there. The fandom may have joked a lot about it being an eyesore, but we weren’t wrong when saying it sticks out among the rustic town of Ponyville like a sore thumb. “Ah think it’ll be easier fer Twilight t’ understand if ya changed fr’m colt to filly,” Applejack says simply as we pass several ponies. I’m not getting nearly as many odd looks I’d have expected, but, then again, I don’t look all that different from the ponies, since they all just are humanoid with pony ears and tails. Now, if I’d wound up in a regular quadruped Equestria, then I definitely would be turning a lot more heads right now. In answer to her statement, I look up at the sky. It’s covered in grey clouds. The rain from yesterday evening is clearly not over yet. “Seems pretty pointless to me,” I shrug. “Twilight or Spike could easily just boil some lukewarm water when we get to the castle.” “But, it’ll be easier t’ just use water straight fr’m the tap, don’t ya agree?” the farmer replies, looking a little annoyed that I’m arguing with her. “What, don’t ya like being that way? Ah noticed ya came out the shower last night as yer filly self.” I frown in annoyance at her. “Because the pyjamas you gave me were designed for a girl, obviously! Frankly, I couldn’t give two shits which form I’m in.” To the confused sceptical frown, I continue. “Yesterday was just really overwhelming for me. I suddenly find myself transported to another world, my whole body has been changed and I find out some asshat wanted me to fight in a war that had nothing to do with me and expected me to be okay with it all without even asking first.” Apple Bloom looks shocked. Clearly she hadn’t gotten that part of the story yet. I glance up briefly as I feel rain start to lightly fall. “Being Ranma, in Equestria and having Ranma’s curse isn’t what bothered me. It’s that I was taken from my home, had all my main memories repressed and was just expected to fight in a war without any proper training.” “Ya don’t mind being a colt who turns int’ a filly?” Apple Bloom asks. “Cuz Ah know several colts who’d act like it was the end o’ the world if they were in yer shoes.” I shake my head. “Ranma’s curse isn’t my problem. You’d be hard pressed to find any guy who wouldn’t jump at the idea of getting that kind of power. My issues are I wasn’t asked first. It was just thrust upon me without any warning. Not that I’d have agreed anyway if that asshat had offered it to me first.” Apple Bloom cocks her head. “While the idea of having Ranma’s power, well, it’s really a curse, but, whatever, is an appealing idea, if the catch is you’re expected to fight in a war you have no stakes in and the one asking you to join acts like the asshat who did this to me, most would refuse outright, regardless,” I say, shaking my head. “No one in their right mind would sell away their freewill just for that.” The rain starts in earnest. “Ah still don’t see why ya thought yer colt form was a dumb… idea…” Applejack starts again, before she looks to me giving her a deadpan stare, now girl type as the rain comes down. There’s silence for a moment as the three of us stand in the rain. After what feels like forever, Applejack lowers her hat and looks away, muttering, “R-right”, her tone full of embarrassment. Deciding not to push it further, I start off in the direction of Twilight’s castle, Apple Bloom and her sister not far behind. A few minutes later we arrive and Applejack, still hiding behind her Stetson, knocks on the door several times. Not long after, the door opens to reveal a boy about two thirds Apple Bloom’s size. His skin is purple, with a sheen to it that make me realize they’re very fine scales. His ears, unlike the ponies, are on the sides of his head, like mine, only his are those green frill things in show. His hair (yes, hair. How in the world can a dragon have hair, even in humanoid form?) is a bright green, the same colour as his ear frills, with a little patch of purple at the front and scruffy. He’s wearing a simple light-green shirt under a slightly darker purple than his scales jacket and blue shorts. His feet, which I notice are slightly more like dragon feet from the show, are bare. Guess he was in a no shoes or socks mood today. His bright green eyes with slitted black pupils light up when he sees the orange mare. “Oh. Hey, Applejack.” His eyes turn to me and his expression blanks for a moment, before he deadpans and facepalms. “That explains it.” I glance between the Apple sisters, confused. “Explains what, Spike?” AJ asks. The dragon boy just shakes his head and indicates for us to come inside. “You’ll find out.” Soon as we walk in, I hear a faint yelling, the voice unquestionably being Twilight’s Sparkle’s. She sounds really angry and… wait. Is that the Royal Canterlot Voice? What in the world angered her that much she’s using the RCV? As Spike leads us down the hall, I mention to Spike that it’s odd that, even though I can tell Twilight’s using the RCV, it doesn’t really sound all that loud. “Just wait til you open the door,” he says, sounding an odd mixture of tired and amused. He leads us to, surprisingly, a door that I recognize as the one leading into the room with the Cutie Map. “Brace yourselves,” he mutters, reaching out and pushing the doors inward. The moment they’re open even a crack, my ears are bombarded by a screaming voice. “… THINK I’D BE OKAY WITH THIS! I’VE NEVER EVEN MET THIS RANMA PONY BEFORE! HOW DARE THEY GO BEHIND MY BACK ON THIS!” O…kay. I’m lost. Someone informed her about me and she’s… angry about it? Is she angry that someone was forced to come to her world against their will in a body not their own? That I was just expected to take part in a cosmic war without my opinion on the matter even being asked? Somehow, Twilight must’ve heard the door opening, because her head snaps around in our direction, so fast I think for a second she looks like an owl. Twilight is definitely a sight. Her lavender skin looks very nice. She’s isn’t wearing anything fancy, much to my surprise. Just a simple light-purple sweatshirt, black shorts, with black leggings on her, well, legs. Her mane and tail are just like in the show, dark indigo with streaks of purple and pink, both ending in straight edges. There’s a nub-like horn on her head similar to Princess Luna’s, though Twilight’s looks as big as my pinky finger, lavender wings folded behind her back. However, any further examination of her appearance is put on hold as I feel my eyes trapped in the gaze of her bright purple eyes glare daggers into mine that are seriously setting off my flight or fight response. Almost too fast to see, Twilight lunges forward, her eyes promising pain. As if by instinct, my legs bend and jump up, flipping in mid-air, my shoes finding purchase on the wall and I push forward, flipping through the air as I go over the lavender girl’s head, landing firmly in a crouching position on the table of the Cutie Mark. I quickly turn around, demanding, “What’s your problem, Twilight Sparkle?” She whirls around, her face filled with anger, pointing at me. “Explain to me, right now, why Princess Luna and my parents are making me have an arranged marriage with you?!” … WHAT?!