A human faces a group of pony friends humanity has wronged and who call for a judgment.
Humanity discovered Equestria. What had to inevitably happen happened. Now a human is caught up in a pony judgment. Trapped, hurt and without a lawyer, any knowledge of the system nor real hope of victory, he must discover how to manage his way out of his predicament. Or learn a lesson, though that part shall depend on his own judgment...
He could see that. The road was going straight into the cliff and just disappeared. Yet, he knew that road used to lead somewhere.
“It’s big.” He answered.
His guide just nodded in silence. Embarrassed, he tried to find something else to say, just to keep any sort of conversation going, like “I heard there used to be a castle here” or “what was the name of this place again”, but nothing good came up.
He felt a bit silly, like someone who believed a deodorant ad and expected women to chase him. If someone had asked him why he had come there, in the middle of nowhere, to watch the gigantic crater, he couldn’t have offered a good answer, if any at all.
“Seen enough?” His guide asked.
The answer had always been yes, given that there was nothing left to be seen. But that’s not what the question truly was. The right hand of his guide was already on the car’s key. The cigar in his guide’s mouth wasn’t even smoking anymore.
So what if there was nothing to see, or do, or just nothing at all ? Couldn’t the natural curiosity of any human not be enough to justify taking one goddamn minute to acknowledge that something did happen? Just because there weren’t any ruins left, nor traces of the inhabitants, didn’t mean it wasn’t an historical site nonetheless. There was the crate. Maybe not the biggest one, there were certainly bigger ones on earth, but this one was man made. That alone merited some sort of respect instead of a yawn.
“I’m going for a walk” He responded.
And just as to convince himself he wasn’t all talk, his legs immediately cursing him for this stupid pride, he begun his descend within the crate under the annoyed look of his guide who would quickly transform this into an opportunity to take a little nap. Humans are resourceful like that.
Meanwhile, he continued his descent with the natural order of things in mind. First, putting one step in front of the other. Second, not falling down. Third, never to care about how much time has passed. Fourth and foremost, he was already at the bottom.
It had gone really fast in his head, but the sun was already low in the sky. How long had it been since he had felt so exhausted and yet alive at the same time? Not that his body wouldn’t avenge itself in the coming days, of that he was absolutely certain, but he just couldn’t let that sensation go. It could hardly be called an adventure, but it felt like it and that was all that mattered at this point. Now he hadn’t come for nothing, if one ignored that he could have done in his home country just as well.
So braving the setting sun, he just kept going.
Prideful.
Boldly.
Until the day let its place to the night and it immediately became clear how stupid of a move it had been.
The first rule of a mountain is to respect the mountain. Recklessness is paid with one’s life. Thankfully, the air didn’t get too cold and he had slowed down considerably beforehand, so most of his transpiration had dried already. He could see the many stars in the sky and given the lack of wind, there was not too big of a risk of rain.
He reopened his eyes to see just darkness all around and a small fracture of the sky high above. Then he felt something moving under him. The whole ground was shaking very violently, and he got thrown aside, fell on the hard rock ground and screamed out of both fear and pain.
Another scream responded to his own, louder and higher pitched, right next to him.
There was something, right there, in the darkness, something alive.
And he already knew what the creature was, though he couldn’t still imagine it could be real.
“What’s going on ?” A voice asked, coming from another direction.
Other voices joined: “Are you alright?”. “Where are you?”. “We’re coming, just hang tight !”.
He had to go. He got up, felt his left leg killing him, ignored it and just used the rock wall to keep a semblance of equilibrium. Things became way easier when a light revealed the rocks he was grasping on and walking over. He could see now, meaning they could see him too.
“A human !” They shouted.
“Don’t let it escape !” One of them ordered.
“Leave it to me.” Another one said.
He considered just surrendering at this point, seeing no way to flee fast enough in his condition, but a violent shock propelled him to the ground. By reflex, his cowered and put his arms in front of his head. That was a very good reflex, as a cascade of punches just fell onto him, so fast they felt simultaneous.
Death by pony. Now that is one hell of an epitaph. Good luck explaining that one at the gates of paradise.
“Stop it, stop, just stop !”
He couldn’t feel his arms anymore. Or more accurately, his arms were hurting like hell, but the terror of dying was still overcoming any other sensation.
The punches had stopped though.
Opening a quarter of one of his eyes, he saw two ponies holding another one who was explaining in no uncertain terms what it was going to do with him. It was surrounded by a purple halo too. Magic most likely. He had seen documentaries about it.
A Pegasus, on normal pony and a unicorn. His eye wandered a bit to the right and he got corrected. Two unicorns. And this one was approaching him.
He crawled back again, offering one last prayer under his breath.
“It’s okay, you don’t need to be afraid, we are not going to hurt you”. The unicorn said. “Well, we are not going to hurt you anymore. Sorry about that.”
“It would be good if he stayed a little bit afraid though.” Another pony said. “Would make things easier.”
He was of the opinion that he was more than scared enough. Hearing those words had calmed him down a bit and thus, all of his body took this opportunity to remind him of how much damage he had received. He moaned and started crying.
Then the pain just all went away. He was surrounded by the purple light. Magic. That was truly an incredible power. He wished he could do it too.
And understanding the situation, immediately regretted the thought.
“I’m sorry, but I won’t repair your broken arm and leg. We truly need you to stay with us for the time being.”. The unicorn said. It then turned to the others and added: “I call for a judgment”.
“Seriously?” Asked the Pegasus. “But it’s a human!”
“I call for a judgment. Do you agree?”.
One after the other, they all agreed, until it came to the Pegasus.
“It’s a human!” It complained.
“I know. But we are ponies and such circumstances call for a judgment. Do you agree?”
“Humans are our enemies.” It argued.
“Do you agree to a judgment?”
Reluctantly, the Pegasus nodded, but not without a very telling look at him.
The unicorn made the presentation. There were one normal pony, which they named themselves “earth pony”, two unicorns and, contrarily to what he had thought, two Pegasi, the one who had come very close to crushing his skull and apparently one that he had fallen unto.
They all had ponies names, from Rainbow Dash to Twilight Sparkle and every candy in between.
And they were going to hold a judgment. He wasn’t prepared at all but didn’t have much of a choice. If there was any hope of getting out of there alive, he had to play their little game.
It started right away.
“It is a human. It’s an enemy. They should all die.” Rainbow Dash argued.
He lowered his head. The biggest problem was, he agreed. He was a human, and humans hadn’t been, well, one would say “very friendly” towards the small equine specie.
“If you don’t remember, why don’t any of you go take a quick glance at our glorious Canterlot ?” Rainbow Dash continued. “Oh yeah, that’s right, you can’t, ‘cause it doesn’t exist anymore, because of humans, which it is one of.”
“So what ?” He responded.
All the ponies’ heads turned towards him. He had let it out loud without even realizing it. Yet it wasn’t the time to be afraid anymore. He had to defend what happened, or his fate was already written in his own blood spilled all over the walls of this future tomb of his. So what indeed?
“I wasn’t there, I wasn’t part of any of it. I was just a child when it all happened” He said with what little confidence he managed to muster.
He observed their reactions but saw nothing except empty stares. His words seemed to have flown towards them, then ricocheted around some force field and ended up somewhere around the back of the cave and nobody cares land.
So that was what he was facing. Creatures ready to blame the fault of the parents onto their child. How very… human, he thought.
“You should just stay quiet dear.” Rarity told him.
He was going to defend himself once again, when Twilight interrupted:
“Wait. His argument does make some sense. It isn’t very relevant, but if the human wants to speak, we should let him do so.”
“Oh come on!” Dash exploded. “You’re going to let a human speak during a judgment?”
This time, he felt enough anger that any doubt vanished. Of course he had the right to speak ! What kind of justice was this supposed to be ? Maybe they hadn’t been that wrong in wiping out such an absurdly unfair society…
“Let the human speak”. Applejack said.
“I… I’m sorry, I too think we should hear what he wants to say…” Fluttershy whispered.
Dash crossed her hoof but seemed to accept the decision of the others. He could feel her animosity toward him growing however.
“That said.” Applejack added. “The point isn’t whether or not you personally participated in the actions of your kind. Humans are evil creatures, and you are a human.”
“I didn’t commit any crime.” He argued back. “You cannot say that I am evil without knowing me personally, without any evidence other that my specie”.
“But you did.” Rarity claimed. “You attacked poor dear Fluttershy.”
“Well, actually…. I think…” Fluttershy said softly.
“I didn’t attack any pony whatsoever!” He angrily shouted back. “I was hiking and fell into a crevasse.”
“Likely story…” Dash let out loud.
“It’s the truth!” He claimed as assertively as he could.
Not that he expected to be believed.
“Doesn’t change the fact you’re a human.” Dash continued letting out, without even looking in his direction, which angered him even more.
“I won’t apologize for being born on two legs instead of four.”
He wished he had a microphone to drop. Not that it had been particularly clever, in fact he had probably just condemned himself with those words, but he didn’t care anymore. This was a sham of a trial, he was condemned anyway and at least he would die with pride.
To his utmost surprise, his statement was welcomed with laughter, from Twilight, Applejack, Rarity and even Fluttershy who chuckled a bit.
“Well said partner!” Applejack launched at him, which hit him in the face harder than any of Dash’s punches.
“Seriously?” Dash asked.
For once, he agreed with her. He couldn’t figure out any pattern in the rational, if rational there was, of those horses.
“Even you Fluttershy ?” Dash asked again.
She gasped and hid behind her own mane. Her cheeks red, she just said:
“I just think he looks so cute…”
“You think every animal looks cute!” Dash replied.
The animal in question was still trying to figure out how to proceed any further. Did he have allies now? Were they just making fun of him in some sort of sadistic twist?
“Rainbow Dash, you know very well what this judgment is about. Why not cutting off the chase and going to the point?” Twilight asked her.
“You want to get to the point? The humans destroyed everything, Fluttershy screamed, we found a human, I defended all of you from the human. Those are the facts. You’re just ungrateful.”
“We are very grateful…” Twilight said.
“It’s true.” Applejack agreed. “I mean, we’ve been together for so long. We have lived such terrible things together, lost so much, I get what you felt. I can’t pardon the humans either.”
She had approached her friend and hugged her. So had Rarity, and Twilight, and Fluttershy. So that was the end he told himself. Those weren’t as much ponies as weathervanes. One second with him, the next against him. Were the wind to blow in a third direction, they might agree with the rocks themselves. Truly illogical creatures to the very end.
“So that’s it huh?” He asked.
“Just shut up.” Dash said. “I still hate you and all those like you.”
“Yeah, I figured as much…” He replied.
A part of him was telling him to follow the advice a just shut up, because there are many ways to die, and some are way more painful than others, so he should at least try to get a quick one. But another part of him was eerily relaxed. He had interpreted it as his acceptance of his coming death, and yet…
“Alright, alright!” Dash suddenly shouted. “I get it. I will do it.”
“Thanks.” Twilight told her.
“We knew you would. Truly proud of you.” Applejack approved.
“It is for the best.” Fluttershy added to the choir.
The group hug dissolved and Dash emerged, victorious, a defiant look in her eyes, and with every step she took a bit closer to him.
She then bowed her head and said:
“I’m sorry.”
His whole life flashed before his eyes. A life made of ponies, crazy ponies, absurd ponies, mad ponies who were saying this most ludicrous of things.
It took seven attempts before he managed to finally mutter a word in response:
“What?”
“I said I’m sorry, okay?” Dash replied, her look avoiding him and her front right hoof nervously making circles on the ground. “I’m apologizing to you.”
I was now making way much more sense. He was dead and this was some sort of delusion or test in a purgatory of some sort. Or just a dream. Any of that made so much more sense than a pony apologizing to a human.
“What?” He said again.
“Rainbow Dash is telling you that she is sorry.” Twilight explained. “You… you don’t have to respond if you don’t feel like it.”
In a sense, it was very logical to be so utterly lost in a foreign world, inside a crevasse, in company of mythical talking horses with magical abilities. And still. Still…
“What about the judgment? What is the verdict? Am I guilty, not guilty, or have I just gone mad here?”
The five pony friends looked at each other, suddenly realizing.
Rainbow Dash reacted first.
“You… thought this was about you?” She asked, more to herself than to him exactly.
“It wasn’t?” He replied.
“Oh dear…” Rarity muttered.
She then approached him and hugged him as softly as she could so as to not cause pain due to his still broken arm and leg.
“I don’t get it. If I was not on trial, then what was this judgment you were invoking?” He asked.
Twilight approached and, after a few breaths, to let her think clearly on how to explain, told him:
“This wasn’t a trial. Trials require a long procedure, evidence, lawyers, a proper judge, time to investigate… This was a simple judgment. I felt that my friend had behaved in a very bad way, though technically not illegal, and wanted her to judge her own actions with our help. A judgment.”
“I… huh… what?” He asked again.
“I said that I’m sorry.” Rainbow Dash told him. “I get it, I shouldn’t have punched you so much and so hard. You were hurt, you were fleeing, there was no real reason to be so violent. I mean, there were plenty of reasons, like so many reason in fact…”
“What Dash is trying to say…” Applejack interrupted her “… is that it’s wrong to use too much violence if you can avoid it. She was right to attack you, but she could have stopped as soon as she had seen that you weren’t a threat to any of us.”
“Yeah… that.” Dash agreed. “Sorry…”
He still couldn’t tell if they weren’t joking. It was all just going too fast.
“Well, now that that’s done, I know that our night of sleep ended up being a bit short but we should move on.” Twilight said.
“Wait!” He shouted. “So I’m just free to go?”
The purple light surrounded him once again, and as if to answer his question, his arm and leg responded to his solicitations again, better indeed than they had for quite a long time now.
“I don’t understand.” He said out loud. “I’m a human.”
He watched, as Twilight used her magic and, one after the other, made her friends disappear in a flash of magic toward their next destination. That at least made sense: there was no way, even with both his arms and legs, that he could hope to follow them.
But when only Twilight remained, she sighed and approached him once again.
“Leave this place. Leave this world.” She told him.
“Not until I understand. I’m a human, we cannot resist a mystery.” He lied.
“What is it you want to understand?” She asked.
“Am I guilty? Are we guilty? Are we the bad guys?”
She paused. And yet, he could read her eyes as if her feelings were his own thoughts. Mostly because they were. She was looking at him the way he would look at a child, or some puppy.
“I am sorry.” She finally answered. “We cannot judge an entire specie. It just doesn’t make sense to me.”
And she teleported away, leaving nothing but a small magical flame that guided him out of the crevasse and into a new world.
