> The things i do for love
>  by Crackshot
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

> An beginning, within an ending(prologue)
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

This was it….. My final moments… again. I had lost everything. Everything I cared about, taken away from me in a single moment. Three years of therapy and drinking couldn’t take away the pain…. But I knew one thing that could. A bullet was an amazingly simple thing…. So small… and yet.. So deadly. I hadn’t used a gun the first time, because I knew my parents would want an open casket funeral. But this time? I didn’t give a shit about what anyone else wanted. Not anymore. Every full moon, I turned into a ravenous monster, who killed and ate without a care in the world…. And I didn’t care. I had been waiting for the day the guards would finally put an end to me, but they never could. There were occasionally blue moons, and I would still go on a rampage, tearing ponies limb from fucking limb until the guards showed up. I wasn’t gonna let them kill me, though. Fuck no was I gonna do that. Even when I didn’t try, they couldn’t kill me. Oh well, I’d do what they never could… put an end to this beast…. Or at least that’s what I thought I’d do. I had a flintlock pistol(because they have fucking TV’s, but they can’t make god damn semi-auto. Like that makes a shit ton of sense.) and I rammed it under my jaw. Yeah, I rammed it. You know why? Because I didn’t give a fuck. Anyway.. I pulled the trigger… only to be met with a loud click!… which pissed me off. “Fucking miss-fire.” I grumbled to myself.

“It might work better if you put it to your temple. The gun powder tends to pour out unless you’re holding it level.”

“Oh yeah. Thanks……” I said, before I realized someone else was in my house. I quickly turned to see, standing in the middle of my living room…. Discord. Yeah. He’s back from the dead. “Should I be surprised that you’re still alive?” I asked him. In all honesty, I wasn’t. is that a bad thing?

“Well…. Kind of, yes. I mean, you did kill me yourself. But, I can not die. It’s a simple concept really, you see-” I cut him off for the second time in my life. It didn’t feel any better the second time around.

“You can’t have good without evil, order without chaos, vice versa, without the entire world going to shit. I know. I’ve heard this speech a thousand times when playing Kingdom Hearts.(I miss that game.) So, what the hell do you want?” I asked him…. I wasn’t really in the mood to talk, as I had a trigger to pull, walls to paint an off red color, and so on. But, I figured he was here for a reason, be it to kill me, and save me the trouble, or to make me another deal.

“I’m here to make you a deal.” called it.

“What kind of deal? This time, I’m reading the contract, you know.” I said. I had made that mistake once already, and look where it got me.

“Oh, one I think you’ll like very much. You do a bit of espionage, murder, you know, the kind of things you’ve been doing for the past couple years.” something didn’t seem right about this. I doubted he wanted me to kill just anypony.

“Who do you want dead, and what do I get in return?” I asked…. He gave me a smile that told me I was either going to love this deal, or kill him again on the spot.

“I want you to kill……. The remaining elements of harmony.”……

“You’re forgetting something. What do I get in return?” I know, you’re all gonna hate my guts now…. But if the price is right, I’ll do just about anything these days.

“Oh, nothing to important. Just….. Rainbow Dash, brought back from the dead.”

“Deal.”

> The head of the snake
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A/N: alright, just gonna let you guys know, this stroy is gonna be filled with way more blood and gore than "My little werewolf", starting right now. this chapter is deffinatley not for the faint of heart. you have been warned. enjoy!







“I thou- wait what?” he said…. Funny shit. He actually thought I’d say no to that.

“I said we have a deal. I kill them, you bring her back, no tricks, no lies, nothing. I give you blood, you give me Dashie. Simple.” I said, extending my hand for a shake, which he took.

“Really now, I expected some more….”

“I swear to god, if you say it, I will kill you were you stand.” I knew what he was going to say. He was going to say he had expected more loyalty from me. You know how big of a dick move that would have been? No, you don’t, Because you didn’t have the very embodiment of it taken from you… I’m sorry, I get upset when I talk about that. Anyway….. Yeah. I took the deal. Go ahead and send me hate mail, do whatever, but I took the deal. You know why? Because I never got to tell her how I felt. How much I loved her. I never told you guys that before she died either. I was to scared to admit it…. To scared of any complications that might arise because of the whole species barrier, and because……. I never admitted it to myself. I never could… not until she was gone..

“Ahem.” oh, yeah.

“Alright then. I’ll find them, and kill them. You want their heads, hearts, or can I just go to town?” I asked. Full moons aren’t the only times I killed ponies at this point. I was a cold hearted killer now. You remember Rage and Reason? Yeah, well Reason’s dead. I lynched his ass a couple years ago.

“You can just go to town. I have my ways of knowing these things.” heh, I’m sure you do.

“Alright…. When and where do I meet you when I’m done?” I didn’t exactly expect him to just show up after I killed the fifth one and say ‘Hey! Here’s Rainbow Dash!’ and her to walk out and hug me or anything. In fact, I expected her to hate my guts. But that didn’t matter to me. I just wanted her to be alive. I could die happy knowing that.

Now I know how Spectrum felt.

“Where this all began.” he said as he disappeared. Way to be real fucking cliché Discord. Way to be cliché. I sighed and went to put on my armor. I hadn’t worn it since that day… but I had a feeling I’d need it. If I remember right, we’re over due for a full moon. This oughta be an interesting experience. I hadn’t seen any of the mane five since that day in the throne room. I tired to avoid things that reminded me of Rainbow, as they sent me spiraling into depression. Depression made me angry. You see where I’m goin’ with this? If not, look up the page a bit, you’ll figure it out. Anyway, as I put my armor back on, I couldn’t help but think of her… all the times we’d had, even though they weren’t that many… and how she died. Three years, and it was still fresh in my mind. How the other me had bashed her skull in. the coroner had told us she died of a broken neck…. Anyway, after I was done, I grabbed my sword and put it into it’s scabbard, on my belt, and put my shield on my forearm. I was ready to seriously fuck some bitches up, and I was gonna do it hardcore. Just then, I heard a knock at the door, and a familiar voice.

“Christian? Are you home? We’ve been really worried about you, and Celestia tells me you’re a dangerous monster, but that can’t be true…. Can it?”….. Twilight Sparkle. You know what they say, you cut the head of a snake, it dies faster then if you cut off it’s tail. At least I think that’s how it went. I’m not sure, but I don’t really care. I walked back downstairs and answered the door to see a very shocked looking Twilight. Probably because I hadn’t gotten a hair cut in almost two years, and because…. Yeah, you know. My hair grows faster than it used to.

“That answer your question, Twilight? Now, what do you want?” I asked, not exactly in the mood to chat. Why didn’t I kill her on the spot? Because, then ponies would see it. I’m a murderer, but I’m not a stupid one, I don’t kill anyone in plain sight. Not when I can help it, anyways.

“Oh! It’s you! You look so…. Different. Anyway, the girls and I are holding a memorial p-”

“No.” I knew where this was going. She wanted me to attend a memorial picnic or party or something for Dashie.

“Why not?”… was she really that thick? I mean really, I think it would be fairly obvious that I didn’t want to be around them, considering I’d been avoiding them for years…. But in this, I saw an opportunity.

“Why don’t you come inside, so we can discuss it in private. I really don’t like the locals knowing my private business.” I told her, which was true. Oh, shit, I didn’t explain my pad to you yet, did I? Well, it’s a cheap, two story hovel, run down as the shady motel you see in those movies where some dude takes a hooker he picked up, for whatever reason. The only furniture I owned was a bed, a couple chairs, a table, and a couch. I motioned for Twilight to sit in one of the chairs.

“So, why don’t you want to attend? It seems like you, of all people and ponies, would be the most inclined, as her death has hit you the hardest.” she said, as I stood behind her. She had no idea what was about to happen.

“Well, you see, there’s only one reason I don’t want to attend.” I said, stealthily approaching her chair until she was within reach.

“And what’s that?” she asked, not looking behind her….. Which would have saved her. It was witty one liner time. I put one hand over her mouth and grabbed her torso with the other.

“I hate reminders.”.. yeah. Witty, wasn’t it? Well, anyway, after I said that, I just kinda snapped her neck to the right as hard as I could, which came with the crunching sound of breaking bone… thing is, it didn’t kill her. How the fuck does that happen? I don’t know, but I could tell she was now having trouble breathing… I mean, her neck was twisted in a way no neck is meant to be twisted, so I guess not being able to breath was the least of her problems. I sighed and pulled out the dagger I kept strapped to my boot(you never know when you’ll need one of those man. Ya never know.) and knelt down next to her, looking at the fear, confusion, and hatred in her eyes. It was great.

“W-W-Why, Christian?”… hm, funny she should ask. I guess she deserves that much.

“Well, you see, I was recently offered a deal, by the only being I know of who can uphold their end of the bargain. the deal was, I kill you, Applejack, Fluttershy, Rarity, and Pinkie, and I get Dashie back, alive and well. Do you think I could turn down a deal like that? I mean, it’s one that means everything to me, at the price of five that mean absolutely nothing to me!” I told her with a laugh that, in all honesty, disturbed me… is it bad when that happens? I didn’t give her a chance to respond. I spun the dagger in my hand around so the tip was pointing up. “But, before I get her back, I have to get rid of you. And you know what that means.” I said, cutting a deep gouge in her side. If there could be any song playing in the background right now, the most appropriate song would be “3 A.M.” by Eminem. Yeah. She screamed in pain, but I ignored her as I cut her again. More screams, another cut. I flipped the dagger around again and began to stab her, again, and again, and again, and again, until there was a pool of blood on my floor so big a small fish could probably live in it…. She was still alive, but barely. “Jesus, how much does it take to kill you! Just fucking die, you damn bitch!” I yelled at the top of my lungs, stabbing her in the kidneys for about the third time. She was so far gone, she couldn’t even scream anymore. All she could do is whimper. I stood up and kicked her in the head, just to make her stop whimpering. It was getting annoying. I then knelt back down, cut her throat, and walked away. There was no way she could survive losing that much blood. No way in hell was she leaving my house alive. I put the dagger back in it’s sheath, and walked out the door, covered in blood, into the night. I was surrounded by guards who all had their swords drawn(they were all unicorns, so it makes sense.).

“Stop right there, you piece of trash! We heard screams coming from your residence, and now you leave it covered in blood. We’ve been trying to nail you for months, but there’s no escape this time, you murdering bastard!” well… that was quite the speech. I looked into the night sky, and saw that it was a full moon. Funny thing is, we’d had a full moon just two weeks prior.

“I have no intentions of simply escaping. I do, however, have every intention of walking away from this.”

> i need to start thinking this shit through.....
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As soon as the words were out of my mouth, I could feel myself change. It had happened far to often for the pain that usually came with it to even phase me anymore. I could feel my bones shifting and growing, my teeth growing longer and sharper. I didn’t fall over, like I had the first few times, but instead I stood tall, towering over all of them. When I was done transforming, I grabbed the closest one by his head, and crushed it, his head popping like a damn grape, blood going everywhere. The others began to attack me, but very few of their strikes could get through my armor, and those that did felt like a mosquito bite. I simply stood there for a moment, letting them get a few hits in. When I grew tired of their persistence, I lashed out in a random direction, slicing through two of one of their legs, and cutting another one pretty deeply. I would have laughed if I could. This was fun. I then howled for a moment before grabbing a healthy one and biting his head off(Pony flesh is really fuckin’ tasty, let me tell ya), savoring the taste of his blood and flesh before throwing his corpse, knocking a few others over, which I instantly pounced on, clawing at them, ripping the flesh from their bones to the music of their screams. One of the ones that was still standing came up from behind, found a crack in my armor, and stabbed at it. It really fucking hurt. Have you ever been stabbed? In the shoulder? all the way through? Cuz if not, then you have no idea how loud I howled, and how pissed off I was. I turned on him, ripping the sword out of his magic(is that even physically possible? I mean, seriously, how does that work?) and clawed his face, cutting it deep, and getting his eye. Blood was spurting everywhere, and it was beautiful(at least I thought so. A few years of murder and being the only carnivore who can talk in a world of herbivores will give you that perspective.). He was screaming, yelling something about reinforcements, but there was nopony else around who could help him. Only me. And I ate his damn heart out. Have you ever eaten a heart before? They’re surprisingly delicious raw. Like good sushi. That just me? Alright then, this is awkward now. Anyway, they were all dead or gone now. Guts and blood were all over the ground, and I found an almost artistic look to it. Abstractly artistic, of course. It’s not like I saw the god damn Mona Lisa in a pile of corpses or anything like that, that’d just be crazy. I decided I should probably get the fuck outta dodge before more showed up. I was hurt pretty bad, and I didn’t think I could take another squad of guards. I ripped that sword out of my shoulder and started sprinting off into the night, not knowing where I was going, or where the others were. But I would find them eventually. I had to. I began thinking about how I could do something like this. Not the how as in a plan, but how as in how would I live with myself afterwards? How could I murder the ponies I idolized years before in cold blood? “Easy. You don’t live with yourself afterwards. you get her back, and then you blow your damn brains out. She'll probably hate your guts anyway.”. Yeah, Rage is still around. But just because Reason is dead doesn’t mean that he’s in control. He usually is, but I sometimes manage to come up for air, like right now. The one pony I can see myself being completely incapable of ending is Fluttershy… I mean, how could I do something like that to her? “Again, easy. You stop being a pussy and fuck that bitch up, man. Seriously, what the fuck do you want, a written invitation? Jesus.” ignore him, he’s just pissed of that he’s not in control right now. Anyway, I had been running through the forest for quite some time, when the sun began to rise. Not gonna lie, worst. Timing. Ever. You know why? Because I was pretty fucked up in beast form, and wounds get about twice as bad when you change back, so I was really fucked up now.

“God damn it! Where the hell is Fluttershy when you need her?” I asked no one in particular as I limped through the forest in no specific direction. Cuz that’s how I roll, hurt and in no set direction. Cuz I’m smart like that.

“H-Hello?”…. alright, that’s to convenient. I mean, seriously? What are the odds of me just running into Fluttershy when I need her? Slim to none, bro. but that seemed to have been enough.

“Fluttershy? That you?” I called out, looking around, but not being able to find her. Had she become a ninja since the last time I saw her? Maybe she finally became a tree.

“W-W-Who’s there?”… alright, now I’m just offended. I mean, how many people does she know? Seriously?

“It’s me, Christian! Where are you?” I didn’t really have any other choice at the time, considering I was beat to hell. Suddenly, she just kinda stepped out of the bushes… how long had she been there? Seriously, I think she’s a ninja now.

“I-I’m right he- oh dear! You’re hurt!” well no shit! I would have said that, but then I would have felt like a dick….. Oh god, I can’t do this.

“Yeah, I am. I’m hurt bad. Ya think you can help me?” god dude, I really need to start thinking shit through before I make deals. It seems to be getting me into quite a few jams lately.

“Well of course, just follow me.” she said, walking off in what seemed to be a random direction. I had no real choice in the matter, so I followed her, regretting more and more that deal I made. Why did I have to kill all of them? Why not just one? I mean, seriously dude, an eye for an eye, a pony for a pony, if they’re missing one, the elements of harmony are completely useless! Why couldn’t I just leave it at brutally murdering Twilight?*sigh* well….. I guess the shit just hit the fan for me, now didn’t it?
> two down, three and a shit ton of guards in my future
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Well, after a good five minutes of walking, we reached Fluttershy’s little cottage, hut, thing. Whatever ya wanna call it, I don’t really care. When we got there, Fluttershy made me sit down(in a really damn comfy chair, to…. Now I feel really bad) while she went and got the first aid kit. While she was doing that, I went ahead and took off my chest plate to make things easier for her. And let me tell you bro, until you’ve been stabbed, and had to remove heavy ass armor after the adrenalin wears off, you’ve never felt pain. It sucked, so hardcore. When I finally got it off(Fluttershy coming back down multiple times to make sure I was okay…. Where the hell does she keep her first aid kit? She should’ve found it by now.) I noticed how bad the wound actually was, and it was BAD. You know those things you see on those TV E.R. shows, where they show people with the most ridiculous injuries, like a branch through their shoulder? Yeah, well this was worse than that. You could see the tendons in my shoulder(which is where I got stabbed, by the way), and the bones they were attached to. It was nasty, to say the least.

“Oh dear! That looks dreadfully painful…”……. ya think? “Would you like something to help with the pain?”

“Yeah, that would be great.” I said, trying not to sound sarcastic. It was hard. After a life of nothing but sarcasm, it’s hard not to sound sarcastic sometimes. She came back with…. Tea? You’re kidding… right?

“Drink this, it will help!”…. nope, she’s not kidding.*sigh* screw it. I drank it, and it did actually help. A lot.

“Damn… that actually does help.” I said after a few minutes.

“Well that’s good….. It wouldn’t do if it didn’t, now would it?”……….

“Nnope.” I had to, alright? Don’t judge me. After that, she went to work, bandaging me up… she never asked what happened, which I found to be odd. Very odd….. I wonder…… “Urk!” oh… that’s why. She currently has a piece of cloth around my throat, and is choking the life out of me. That’s why. That’s a problem. My first thought? ‘OH HELL NO!’, but she’s stronger than you think. Took me a bit to throw her over my shoulder, which hurt like a bitch. “WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM!?” I yelled at her. I was now having serious second thoughts about my hesitation to kill her. She didn’t answer me, though. Unless you count throwing a kitchen knife past my head into a wall as an answer. “Fuck this shit!” I said, drawing my sword and rushing over to her…. Only to get another kitchen knife to my gut as I rounded a corner….. Why do I keep getting stabbed!? Seriously man, it’s getting old. She pulled the blade back out and backed up a bit until she bumped into the wall behind her, looking kinda like I imagine I did when I realized I had just killed myself. Yeah, that freaked out. I stumbled a bit, but I wasn’t dead just yet. “You’re fucking dead bitch!” I yelled as I took a stab at her, which she managed to dodge somehow. I seriously think she’s a ninja. Is there any other explanation for this shit? No, there isn’t. I chased her around and outside of her house, sword drawn…. Until Applejack showed up that is.

“An’ just what the hay do you think yer doin’?”… well, she did try to choke me to death.

“Shit, Fluttershy tried to choke me to death, threw a kitchen knife at my head, and stabbed me in the gut! And moments before that, she was helping me with this stab wound!” I said, showing her my currently bandaged wound.

“Now, ah’m sure she had her reasons fe-”

“Reasons to try and kill me? Yeah, I don’t think so. I swear to god, I catch her, she is fucking DEAD!” I yelled, and then I saw a brief flash of yellow out of the corner of my eye. Not gettin’ away this time. I soon had her cornered in her bedroom(No. I know where that mind of yours is going, and no. I’m not that far gone.” and had my blade to her throat. “What the fuck is your problem?” I asked her, and was only answered with an evil glare. Screw it. I shrugged, not really caring, and thrust my sword into her chest, killing her instantly. She may have tried to kill me, but it was still Fluttershy, and I didn‘t want her to suffer…... God have mercy on my soul. I looked around her room, trying to find any indication of why she had done what she had done. All I found were blank papers, and photos of her and the other elements of harmony….. Did she blame me for Rainbows death? Wouldn’t surprise me. I walked back outside, to be met with an angry Applejack.

“Now, would ya care tah explain why ah heard that Twilight was killed…. At yer house?”…. shit. I figured I should at least tell her before I killed her to.

“Well…. I found a way to bring Rainbow back."

“Say what now? Are ya practisin’ necromancy now?”… yep, expected reaction.

“No, you know I can’t do magic…. I made a deal..” I said as I readied my sword… I was gonna have to do this fast.

“What kinda deal?” she asked, not noticing the way I was standing.

“A Discord deal. I give him five lives in exchange for hers.” she was giving me a very evil look.

“And Twi‘s was one of those lives?” well, now or never.

“Yeah. And so is yours.” I said with a swing…. And a miss. Before I could swing again, she was bolting down the street, probably trying to get the guards. “That’s just awesome. That‘s just FUCKING awesome”

> Regrets and second thoughts.
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

A/N: alright everypony, i hope you all like the new chapter, but i need a bit of help. I'm going to need a song for the next chapter, and not just any song, but a lullaby. now, if any of you can find one that would be suitable(With words, and in a female range would be nice, for reasons that will become obvious as soon as you finish this chapter) or you come up with one, send me a link, or the lyrics, via Private message. i hope y'all can help me out, cuz if not, the next chapter might be kinda far away. But, for right now enjoy this bit of plot twists.


I was tired, hurt, and soaked in blood. I was limping through the forest, trying to just find a place to rest, to think, to figure out if I was actually doing the right thing. I’m sure you’re wondering just how I got into this position, and I think I have enough time to tell you. I’m pretty sure I managed to lose the guards an hour ago. “You know what this means, don’t you?” damn it Rage, I swear to god if you sa-“Flashback. Trust me, kid, I don’t like it any more than you do.” I guess he’s right… wait a minute… am I stoned? I’m seeing ripples everywhere……… I knew I shouldn‘t have eaten that one guy, he was totally tripping balls……..
**********************************

He sits there, bandages around his midsection, where he had been stabbed. He had cauterized the wound earlier, using his blade to burn the wound shut. just gonna point this out, but the blade isn’t actually THAT hot. I had to heat it over the stove….. Can I continue now? Hm? Oh, shit, sorry, go on. Thank you. As I was saying, he sits there, bandages around his slightly burnt midsection, sharpening his sword. He knows he has time before the guards arrive, and he likes being prepared. He puts his sword back into it’s scabbard, and walks up the stairs to find his armor, which he left where he had found the bandages. When he reaches the top of the stairs, something compels him to look into the mirror to his right, and what he sees there…… disturbs him...... Alright bro, I’m sorry, but I’m gonna have to cut you off there. This whole third person, present tense thing isn’t doing anything for me. So, here’s what happened when I looked in the mirror. Have you ever just looked into the mirror, and looked yourself in the eye? Well, normally, you expect to see…. Something. Anything, be it fear, joy, sorrow. Hatred, whatever….. I hadn’t looked in a mirror in almost four years now, and I had usually seen something in my eyes when I had, but now….. I saw nothing. They were blank. No shine, no sparkle, no fear, hatred, anger, or anything, just….. Nothing. Beyond my eyes, I saw a monster. My eyes were sunken in, my lips were white(like milk white bro. that’s not healthy.), my teeth were an orange color(a mixture of yellow, from lack of care, and red, from…. Well, you know.), and my hair was turning grey, my beard was longer than it should have been(I shouldn’t even have one, considering I’m now nineteen…. But then again, I had one when I was sixteen, so whatevs.), and, in essence, I looked like those homeless people you see in the street, begging for change…. Except I had armor. In my reflection, I saw the one thing I always swore to myself I’d never be. The kind of person that, when given a choice between suicide and Columbine, would choose Columbine without hesitation, simply because it meant they got to kill people… and it scared me. What have I become?” I asked myself, not expecting a response. Though, of course, I did.

“Well, it seems to me that you’ve become quite the public enemy number one. Congratulations on that one, my friend. Quite an accomplishment, if I do say so myself.” I turned around to see Discord, standing there.

“Figures. I don’t suppose you’re here to help me at all, are you?” I asked, knowing full well the answer.

“Why, of course not, my dear boy. That wouldn’t be fair, now would it? I simply came to see how you were doing. Want one?” he said, pulling a pack of smokes out of nowhere.

“You’re damn straight I want one. I didn‘t know you smoked.” I said as he handed me one. Now, I know I’m gonna get shit tons of hate mail for this one, but screw off. I’m nineteen, so it’s legal, and I’ve been through a lot, so deal with it. He lit both our smokes(not sure how) and put the pack away.

“I could say the same of you, but, as you are so fond of saying, shit happens.”

“Hey! Watch your mouth. I’m the only one allowed to swear around here, alright?” I said jokingly. Good times, good times. But seriously, the shit was about to hit the fan. “I don’t suppose you could at least help me put on my armor?” I asked, to which he simply snapped. “That was fast. I kinda expected you to come up with some bullshit excuse about rules.” I said, causing us both to laugh. He disappeared in the midst of the laughter, which is when I allowed myself to let my mind wander for awhile. I didn’t want to fight anypony anymore. I was tired. I was always tired. Something I think I may have failed to mention, is that werewolves can never get a good nights rest in their lives. Nightmares plague our dreams constantly, mostly of killing those closest to us. That, and if you drink the blood of someone you killed in human form, you turn instantly, even if it’s broad daylight. The only reason this doesn’t apply to beast form, is that you’re already in beast form. You can’t very well change into a werewerewolf, that would just be stupid. I thought about this as I walked back downstairs and saw Fluttershy’s corpse. There was enough blood around her for me to drink….. But did I want to? At this point, I was tempted to just turn myself in and face my fate. I sat down on the stairs and just….. Stared at my hands… wondering how much blood had been on them…. And how many times I had cried into them. I didn’t know, but if I had a wall with tally marks on it for each time I had, I’d have to add another. I cried, uncontrollably. “How the fuck could I do this? How could I kill them… and feel nothing? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME!?” I yelled as I punched the stair I was sitting on, leaving a good sized dent in it.

“Yer a buckin’ maniac is what ya are.” came the familiar voice of Applejack. I didn’t look at her.  I couldn’t bring myself to do it.

“C-C-Christian? Is that you? Y-You were one of my bestest best besties…..” Said the voice I could single out as Pinkie’s…. I couldn’t take that bit of sentiment, and began to openly sob. Yeah, I cried, right there in front of Applejack and Pinkie. Ya got a problem with that? Cuz I don’t really care if you do.

“I-I know I was…… but I….. I’ve changed, Pinkie.” I said, staring at the ground, my hair falling into my face, my tears staining the floor. “I’m not the s-same person you knew, Pinkie….. I’m just… tired. Tired of pushing on through all this bullshit… tired of fighting… tired of living…” I said….. And she sat down next to me.

“Pinkie! I told ya, he’s dangerous! Get away from ‘im.” yelled Applejack, but she was ignored. Pinkie threw her hooves around my shoulders and…. Sang softly into my ear… the most haunting melody I have ever heard….

> ANNOUNCMENT! semi-important.
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Alright everyone, this is just a quick announcement. I will not be posting the new chapter until after newyears day. not because i wont be working on it, or it won't be done, but to give people a chance to take me up on the offer i made in the previous chapter, about the lullaby. i also figured i'd use this page as a details thing for that, i'm looking for something...... remorseful, i guess would be the word. i want it to be(obviously) from Pinkies perspective, and somehow about how she forgives him, and just wants the old him back. the one that she'd shared a few laughs with, and the occasional smile, and fourth wall breaking experiance. it needs to be really sad, yet at the same time hopeful. how soon after new years i post the new chapter really depends on the amount of songs i get sent in, and if i don't get any, i'll have to come up with one myself. i really hope you guys'll help me out on this one, as lyrics aren't exactly my strong point. i look forward to any and all entries, thank you, and have a happy holidays.
> I've never heard such a haunting melody....
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

A/N: I'm back! alright people, just a quick shout out to Tacoking (guest) for the lyrics, thanks man, anyway, enjoy!


Do you, re-mem-ber
way back then
when, we all were
such happy friends...

I, un-der-stand
that you are sad
but what, you’re doing
is ve-ry bad...

Think, of Dashie
for Celestia's sake
Pinkie, is here
to ease you’re heart-ache...

Please, just stop this
Chris-tian
if, not for us
then do it for her...


It was…. Beautiful… no words could describe how…. Soothing her music was. I wanted to block it out, to remove myself from her world, and her, because I didn’t want to hurt her….. But I knew I couldn’t. The only ponies Physically(or would it be magically?) capable of completely removing me from this world were Twilight(Deceased), and the princesses, who probably want to send me to the moon right about now, because I killed her….. And yet here was Pinkie….. Forgiving me for my sins. Forgiving me for my crimes, and for the bloodstains on my hands. “I’m…… I’m tired. I’m just so damn tired.” I said, still sobbing. Yeah, I was STILL crying. Deal with it. “I haven’t had a good nights sleep in years….”

“Sh, sh sh sh. It’s alright now. Just go to sleep. It’ll all be okay when you wake up.” she told me…. And I wanted to. I just wanted it to be over now….. But it can’t be. Not while I still draw breath.

“N-No, it won’t be….. You don’t understand, Pinkie….. I-I-I…. I’m a monster…. It’ll never be alright….. Not w-w-while I’m here.” I tried to explain to her, only to be shushed again. She was clinging to me, and it almost seemed like she was crying to. I didn’t know what to say. At least I didn’t until the guards came in.

“Christian Fleury, you are under arrest for twenty-seven confirmed counts of murder, and two counts of high treason. Your fate is for the princesses to decide.” said the guard captain(or at least I assumed he was a captain. I never got a good look at him, but he sounded like an officer, if that makes any sense.).

“No…” was all I said. Now, don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t resisting arrest, in fact, I welcomed it at this point.

“Excuse me? Sir, you are not in the proper position to tell me no. now come with me.”

“No, no, no, you misunderstood me. I’m not resisting arrest, officer, but is there anyway we can just kinda skip to the final judgment?” I asked. Yeah, I was going there. You would to if you were in my shoes.

“Final judgment?” he asked. How fucking stupid was this guy?

“Ya know, the hangman’s noose, headsman’s block, the electric chair, whatever ponies use for executions these days.” little did I know, they didn’t actually execute anyone. Ever.

“Ooohhh, that final judgment. We don’t do anything like that anymore. But, if you wish, I can get you straight to prison.”… eh, close enough. At least that’s what I thought, anyways. I sighed(I think. The minor details like that are a bit fuzzy right now.)

“Close enough.” I said…. Which caused Pinkie to cry harder. I don’t know why she cared so much. In all honesty, I figured her to go “cupcakes” on my ass, not all…. Emotional. In fact, I expected her, at the very least, to have gone into Pinkamena Diane Pie mode and not give a damn what happened to me…. Considering I just murdered two(well, one really. Fluttershy was in self defense. She attacked me first. That’s my story, and I’m stickin’ to it, damn it!) of her best friends…. Yet she still forgave me. Had Applejack explained everything to her? “Sh, it’s gonna be fine, Pinkie. It’s gonna be just fine…” I lied to her, pulling her a bit closer. If there’s one thing worse than a crying Fluttershy(which I had yet to see in person… and now I never will.), it was a crying Pinkie. She put her head on my shoulder and just kept weeping. Challenge failed.

“No it won’t be! Y-You’re going to jail! I-I-I don’t want one of my best friends to go to jail! How can you attend my parties from in there?” that part just killed me, but I had to keep up my ‘It’s gonna be fine’ act.

“Hey, I’ll be out before you know it. Right?” I asked the guard without looking at him. He obviously knew I was trying to comfort her, because he went along with it.

“Hm? Oh, yes, he’ll be free to go faster then you think.” he said. Applejack obviously didn’t get it.

“Ya mean this here murderin’, back stabbin’, traitor ain’t gonna get that much time?” she asked him. The guard took her to the side, and I’m pretty sure he explained the whole situation to her, because she came back a bit…. Quieter. She also tried to lie, which kinda screwed us. “Y-Yeah, Pinkie. H-H-He’ll be j-j-just fine.” she said. I just kinda glared at her. She was visibly sweating, and looking anywhere but at Pinkie, who was also staring at her. And crying even more heavily. To this very moment, I don’t understand why she cared so god damn much. I mean, we never really talked, we never hung out. I went to a couple of her parties in the hopes that they would make me feel better(and she always managed to find out where I live on my birthday. Go figure.), but me and her were never really close friends. But then again, this was Pinkie, she was close to everyone(so she thought, at least.).

“That bad?” I asked Applejack, knowing that our cover was just blown up with a nuke. She sighed heavily.

“Yeah. That bad.” she said, a concerned look on her face. Pinkie was wailing at this point, and I was still trying to comfort her(an uphill battle, to say the least.).

“Hush, Pinkie. I’ll be fine. As soon as I get out, we can have a huge party, with cake, and drinks, streamers.”

“And candy?” she asked, staring me in the eyes. Let me tell ya, it was the saddest thing ever(With the exception of certain obvious events). I mean, having those big, bright blue eyes, all watered up, and staring into my soul? I almost cried.

“And candy.” I told her. I knew we’d never get to have that party. I was going to die in prison(or so I thought at the time). I didn’t like lying to her, but it was the only way to make her happy.

“Promise?”

“Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye.” I said with the corresponding motions. It killed me inside, knowing that I’d never get to see that through. I heard a cough from the guard, signaling it was time to go. “Alright Pinkie, I gotta go. I’ll see you soon, alright?” I asked her, to which she only nodded. “Hey, is it alright if I go and get a couple things really quick?” I asked the guard. It was worth a shot. If I was gonna prison, I was gonna be for the worst.

“Sure, just be quick about.” he said, to which I ran to the kitchen, looking for phials, jars, bottles, anything I could use to hold a liquid that I could easily hide. I opened a cupboard(after opening every other one in the house) and hit the damn jackpot. It was, quite literally, full of phials. I grabbed about three, and then ran over to Fluttershy’s corpse(which was conveniently out of sight), and collected some of her blood. I felt like shit for doing it, but I’d rather have some on me in case I need it. Stranger things have happened. “Just what are you doing over there, boy?” he asked as I was filling the second phial. It’s harder then you think. It would be easier if she was still bleeding, but all the blood that was coming out of her was on the floor or caught in her hair.

“Just give me a minute, I’m almost done.” I said as I began filling the third phial. When it was filled enough, I put all three of them in hidden pouches(yes, hidden pouches. I’m just a boss like that) in my chest plate. “Alright, lets go.” I said as I turned the corner. 



and walked right into a pair of hooves.

> Welcome to Hel
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

And then I woke up. Not from having my ass knocked out for no apparent reason, but from the dream I was having about being in the forest. Been having that one for a few months now. I’m currently writing this in solitary confinement(I’ll explain in a minute) in the prison I was sent to. Hel. Yep. Now I can say I’ve been to Hel and back, can’t I? Well, let me explain Hel to you for a moment. Hel is basically where they send the rejects of society that they don’t really care what happens to. There’s a torture chamber, two inmates to a cell, mo beds, no toilets, nothing. I haven’t seen the light of day or night since they threw me in here. Anyway, that fucker of a guard cheated me. They dragged me before the princesses, who instantly gave me a life sentence here. However, that guard did make up for it by smuggling me a few things. Namely one of those phials of blood, my dagger, this pencil, and all the paper I’ve been using to write this journal of mine. Hard to believe I’ve been in here for almost a year. Hel, not solitary confinement. Pretty damn close though. Hold on a minute, here comes the guard.

Alright, I’m finally out of solitary, and I see they still haven’t moved the corpse of my last cell mate. That’s what happens when you try some funny shit with me. Anyway, I think their dragging my latest cell mate over now. Yep, they just threw him in here. Another unicorn, too. Great. “Hey meat. welcome to Hel.” I said to him. God, he hasn’t said anything yet, and I already feel like I should hate him. “What’re you in for?”

“Domestic violence, a few years back. My mare talked back to me, so I messed her up. I messed her up real bad. Got transferred here from Ponyville because of a few fights. How about you?” if he is who I think he is, he’s not leaving this prison alive.

“Murder and high treason.”

“Really? Damn, who’d you kill to end up here?”

“Two of the elements of harmony and about twenty odd some others. What’s your name, new guy?” I asked him. Only one way to find out, eh? He’s obviously freaked out, I can see it in his eyes. The prison is dark as a moonless night, but your eyes adjust after a while.

“Name’s Hooves. Swift Hooves.”……..

“Your mare…. Her name doesn’t happen to be Derpy Hooves, does it?”… I swear to god, if he says

“Yeah, how’d you know?” he’s a dead man.

“Well, the last name was a bit of a hint. I’ve seen Derpy around every now and then. I take it her being cross-eyed is your work?”

“Ha! Yep. I messed her up good, I told ya.” he‘d said. Well, the guard just showed up. I’ll be right back.

Turned out we had visitors. “Hey there maggots. You’ve both got a visitor. You know the rules, we unhook your shackles from the wall, but any funny business, and you flank is in a shallow grave.” isn’t he just the nicest guy you ever met? Anyway, yeah, they hook our shackles to the wall, but I’ve got enough slack to write and pace. Both of which I do a lot of. Anyway, they guard stepped a couple steps away, allowing our visitors to approach the cell, but being close enough to do something should anything go wrong. I think I’ve got enough smokes on me to bribe him….. Oh, yeah, the visitors. Mine was Applejack, again. It seemed that she came here at least twice a month to flaunt her freedom. I didn’t really care. Swift’s visitor was Derpy, who stood a good distance away. Smart girl. The guard magically unhooked our shackles, and lit the torches that were spread up and down the hallway. There was still enough shadow in the back. Perfect.

“Applejack. Mrs. Hooves. How are you ladies today? Or is it tonight? I can never figure it out.” I said as I approached the bars that separated me from the innocent. Applejack merely spat on me.

“You murderin’ piece’a trash. They should’a killed ya on the spot, or at least sent ya to the moon. But here ya are.” she said, her words practically dripping with venom.

“Trust me, sometimes this place makes me wish I was dead more then I already do. Have you seen the torture chamber? Nasty stuff. Anyway, how’s  Pinkie holding up?”

“She’s doin’ alright. Ah still havent told her yer in here for the long haul. It’s better that way.” she said, and I couldn’t really argue.

“Ya got that right…. Look, for what it’s worth….. I’m sorry. It was just” a cutoff.

“Human nature?” lol, nope!

“Actually, I was going to say depression and psychosis, but that works too I guess.” I said. She obviously didn’t find it funny, as she walked out. Not much of a visit, was it? Swifts, on the other hand(or hoof, whichever you prefer) was going far more interestingly. She was berating him for being such an asshole, while he was talking shit about what he’d do once he got out. I called the guard over to me.

“What do you want?”

“Sh, keep your voice down. I’ve got an offer to make. I’ll give you every last smoke I’ve got for you to “take a break, if you know what I mean.” I said, hoping this was one of the many dirty guards here in Hel.

“Alright, but if something gets reported, I’m coming down on you like a sledgehammer.”

“Fair enough.” I said, handing him the smokes before he trotted off. Game time. I walked off into the darkness behind swift and pulled out my dagger. I was going to enjoy this. I snuck up behind him, grabbed him by the muzzle, and whispered into his ear. “An eye, for an eye..” I said, gouging out both of his eyes with my blade. I then put the blade to his throat. “The debt of blood must be paid in full.” I said as I drew the blade sharply across his throat, and moved my hand from his mouth to put my arm across his throat and drag his body back into the shadows. I could feel his warm blood trickle over my arm, and down my hand. I admit, it was nice. It had been a while since I had been able to take such pleasure in a kill. I then stepped out of the shadows, back towards the bars, where Derpy stood, mouth covered with one of her hooves, eyes wide. “Go. I’m sure the guards will be here soon enough, and if your standing here gawking at this, they’ll assume you had something to do with it, ad then where will you be? Right here in this cell with me. Not someplace you want to be.” I told her. I did this for her, so there was no way in hell(pun completely intended) I was going to let her get arrested for it. Then she spoke.

“W-Why did you do it?”

“He told me about what he did. I may be a murderer, and I won’t lie, I’ve killed mares, but to take pride in it? No excuse. Now go, run, tell the guards if you want, I’m in here for the long haul anyway.” I told her as I walked away and sat against the wall. She opted to run off. Well, I think I hear the guards coming, so I’ll write more later.

> Slipping away
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

A/N: just gonna say this right now, becasue it might seem like this, but this is NOT the end. not by a long shot. i still have quite a few things lined up for this story. Also, sorry for it being so short, it's really just a quick thing to let you know just how far gone everything is. Enjoy!



Alright everybody(or pony), Reason here. Yeah, I’m back, I know you‘re confused. He may have said I was dead, but I was just away for a while. I know when I‘m not wanted, or needed. When you give up on reason, you no longer need it, as I always say. Anyway, I’ll be taking over for right now because “I SAID SHUT THE FUCK UP SWIFT! HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO STAB YOU!”…. of obvious reasons, and because we don‘t want rage telling this story do we? I will still be referring to him in first person, as we are the same person. Alright? Alright. I’ve been in prison for almost six years now, and I’ve been in solitary for most of it. They stopped giving me cellmates after I ate the last one alive, since they don‘t really feed us that often. Gruesome business. “Dude, shut. The fuck. Up.”… as you can see, I’m slipping mentally, and physically. My muscles are degrading from lack of exercise, my teeth are rotting, and my hair is damn near white. My eyes are bloodshot, my nails are yellow and almost claws in their own right. I haven’t been fed in almost a week, as the guards are to scared to come near the cage they moved me to, and I have to drink what water sneaks through the cracks in the ceiling. I’m in a permanent solitary confinement. “Dude, I said to shut the FUCK UP!” hey, relax, I’m just telling your story. Jeez. “Well tell it somewhere else, alright? I’m not in the mood for this shit.” Alright. As I was saying, the dark of the prison has made me mostly blind, and if I don’t see the sunlight soon, I might not be able to see anything ever again.

“Rise and shine shit for brains, you’ve got a visitor.” came the familiar voice of a guard. God, this can’t end well.

“Christian? Is that you?” came a feminine voice.

“Who is it? I…. I can’t really see.” I said, strangely calm. The voice, though not very familiar, was…. Soothing. As the mare walked in front of the cage, the guard lit the torches, not helpin my vision all that much, in fact the sudden light blinded me for a moment, forcing me to close my eyes tightly. When I opened my eyes again, I could hazily see something pink.

“It’s me…. Pinkie…. Don’t you remember?” she asked.

“I.. don’t, actually, but…. I feel like I should.” I said. I may have forgotten to mention that my memory, having not been the best in the first place, was now all but gone, save for anything inside Hel. I couldn’t even remember why I was there. I knew nothing beyond the bars that held me. I heard light sobbing, and saw the hazy pink figure begin to leave. “No, wait… don’t go. Please… don’t leave me alone again. Don’t leave me with these voices… stay a while… Please?” I begged her. Nearly a year of isolation, and I was sick of myself, of the illusions my mind conjured. I needed something… someone, who was real. The sobbing was still there, but she stopped, and turned around. She sat down in front of my cage, her face close to the bars. If I was able to, I could have touched her… but I was to weak to even stand.

“Y-You promised me… we’d have a big party… W-With cake.. And streamers.. And drinks…” it was all coming back to me now.. At least my last conversation with her was.

“And candy…” I said in a hypnotized tone, my voice cracking from dehydration. The sobbing sounded a bit heavier now, but my vision was still blurred. “Why are you crying, Pinkie? Don’t be sad… everything will be.. Alright.” I said, saying the first thing that came to mind that might comfort her.

“T-That’s what you said six years ago! But… nothing’s the same without you around. I know you weren’t as happy after Dashie died, and you weren’t around all that much, but when you were, it was fun! I-I-I just want those days back.” she said, crying harder.

“Dashie? Who… who’s that? Is she… a friend of yours? She sounds… nice.” I said, closing my eyes for a moment. “I’m sorry for your loss.” I said, upon hearing more crying. I could hear each tear hit the stone floor.

“Sh-She was.. Don’t you remember? Don’t you remember anything?”

“I…. I don’t know. I try to think when the voices aren’t around, but when I do, I can only see… blood.. Stone walls.. This cage.. And angry voices. Not like yours at all.” I said, letting my head droop a little bit. “Do you think they’ll ever let me out of here? I hear the sunlight is wonderful. But the moon… it sounds so much better.”

“Y-You’ll get out of here someday… I promise. I-I’ll show you the sunlight.. And the moon, and the other great things out there.”

“I’d like that… promise you’ll show me?”

“Cross my heart…. Hope to fly… S-Stick a-a-a c-cupcake… in my eye.”
> One day.....
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

We talked for a while, about the outside, about what I used to be like, what it was like in here, and other things. We avoided the topic of what I did to end up in here, however. I asked her, but she told me she didn’t want to say anything about it and wiped away fresh tears. Eventually though, she had to go take care of Sugercube Corner.

“You’ll be back… Right?” I asked her, not wanting to be alone again, with myself.

“O-Of course I’ll be back. You’re one of my bestest b-best friends!” she said, and then she left. All I could do is sit in my cage and wait. And this, my friends, is where our story separates from our “hero” for the first time, as he simply sits and waits for the pink mare to visit again. Speaking of which, she should be walking into the throne room in three… two… one… now, she walked through the doors of the throne room, tears still in her eyes, and sadness weighing heavy on her heart. She couldn’t bare to look at what I had become, and was going to do the only thing she could do about it. “Princess Celestia? Can I talk to you for a moment?” yep. Talk to the princess.

“Of course Pinkie Pie, you can always talk to me. What troubles you, my little pony?” she asked Pinkie, having no clue whatsoever where this was going.

“Well… I just went to visit Christian…. And he’s so…. Not him.” she said, to which Celestia only gave her a puzzled look(which, I have to say, was kind of funny). “He can’t remember anything! He can barely talk or see, and he’s to weak to stand! This isn’t right!” she yelled, breaking down crying…

“And neither was what he did. Have you forgotten that he murdered countless ponies in cold blood, Twilight and Fluttershy among them?” she asked(cold hearted bitch… I spend to much time with rage). She was, however, disturbed by what she heard.

“No I haven’t, but this is to far! He hasn’t seen any form of light since he came here! He’s more white than your coat! you can see his ribs through his shirt, if you can even call it that! His hair is white, for Luna’s sake!” said Pinkie, still crying, her voice rising with her anger. She didn’t know how Celestia could be so cruel, even to someone like me. “He’s dieing! You have to let him go!”… oh shit, here we go.

“Pinkie, you have to understand, I am just as worried as yo-”

“No you aren’t! you don’t care what happens to him!”… Damn, she’s pissed.

“Just as worried as you, but I can not simply let him walk free, as he is still a menace to society. He was sentenced to life, and he must serve his time. I am sorry, I truly am, but that is the way it has to be.” she said, anger and sadness equal in her heart. And that’s when Luna walked in. not entirely sure why, as I can’t exactly see outside, or any clock, but she was there.

“Is something wrong, sister?” she asked, and then she saw Pinkie(still in tears) and somehow instantly understood. “Is this about our otherworldly friend? Has something happened to him?”

“YOUR SISTER IS LETTING HIM DIE IN THE DARK ALONE! THAT’S WHAT’S HAPPENING!” yelled Pinkie at the top of her lungs(I think she may have out done the royal Canterlot voice on that one, too). Luna sighed and shook her head as Pinkie explained to her the condition I was in. after a moment, she spoke again.

“Sister…. I agree with miss Pie on this matter. If he can not even remember why he is imprisoned, or the reason for his grief, then he is not the same one we sentenced to life, and thus should be released. Not to mention the possible health issues.” she said, bringing a slight laugh from Celestia,

“Coming from you who wanted his head on a pike? I’m surprised. Why the change of heart, dear sister?” she said, a smug grin on her face(not sure why).

“It was you who wanted his head, sister! Or have you forgotten the trial already?” she replied, anger in her voice, and damn near the royal Canterlot voice. “His isolation may not rival mine, but his insanity is not something we should over look as a symptom of it. I suggest we release him as soon as possible.” she said, causing Celestia to sigh heavily.

“Alright. I see there is no dissuading you sister. We will release him…” she said trailing off in thought, as Pinkie began to celebrate. “But not yet. We will release him soon, though, don’t you worry.”… god damn you Trollestia, god damn you straight to hell. “If that is all Pinkie, you may take your leave, I must think about this.” she said, standing and walking to her chambers, as Pinkie sulked out the door to go home. And now we return, fillies and gentle colts, to me, talking to myself.

“Hey…. Do you think she’ll actually come back? The last one that came to visit never did….” well that’s because you growled at her, and tried to claw her face off. “Oh… right…” well…. I’m definitely not in any fit shape to do much of anything anymore. But, for the first time in… I can’t remember how long, somepony came with food and water. They opened the gate to my cage and set the plate and the cup down in front of me. I tried to reach for them, but I could barely even lift my arms.

“Here, allow me to assist you.” said the stranger, who levitated the cup to my lips and tilted it, so I could drink. It was cold…. It was nice. My throat had been so dry for so long, that to get so much water was a miracle. I drank the entire cup in one gulp.

“Th-thank you…. So much. Whoever you are.” I said, only receiving a slight laugh in return, as something else levitated right in front of my face.

“Eat. You will feel better.” I did as I was told, and bit off a chunk of the thing that floated there. It was dry, and crunchy on the outside, but warm and soft on the inside…. It was delicious.

“What is this?” I asked when I was done with what was in my mouth, my stomach now full.

“It’s bread. Please, eat more. You need your strength, if you are going to live to see the light of day.” said the voice, but I shook my head as much as I could(which isn’t really saying anything. It was more like a wobble).

“No… I can’t. I might explode if I eat anymore.” I told them. “But thank you… for doing this for me. Who…. Who are you?”

“I am Luna. I am the sister of the night, and I am the moon.” she said, I could only look up into he bright green eyes, and smile for the first time in years.

“The moon? I hear it’s beautiful…. But I can’t see you all that well… I can‘t see anything all that well anymore…” I said, trailing off and slumping over. I was tired. I was to tired to talk anymore. As I fell asleep, I heard one more thing.

“It is… one day you will see it… one day soon.” and I heard her hum a tune as she walked away, her hooves making a clopping sound on the stone floor.

> ... I will come home....
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

It’s been almost a year since that day. Luna has continued bringing me food and water, and sometimes stays and talks to me. Those times are nice. She tells me all about the moon, and every day it sounds more and more like how I imagined it. Pinkie visits when she can, but she tells me she has to go to work, or hang out with her friends. “I wish I had friends….” you do. Why else would Pinkie and Luna keep coming back? “Your… Your right.” aren’t I usually? Anyway, as I sat there in the darkness, I heard a voice call out to me.

“Hey! Rise and shine maggot. It’s your time to go.”

“Go? Go where?” I asked, not knowing what he meant.

“Your free. That pink friend of yours talked to the princess, and she agreed to let you go. Your goin’ home.” he said as he opened the gate to my cage.

“H…. Home? You mean I get to see that nice pink mare again?” I asked, hope in my voice and joy lifting my heart.

“Yep. Now come on, Luna wanted to see you before you left.” he said, levitating me out of the cage and onto his back. “I heard you can’t really walk, and Celestia knows how much grief I’d get from Luna if I dragged you up there all beat up.” he explained. He carried me all the way to the throne room, the other inmates yelling and hollering as we passed. When we got to the throne room, Both the princesses were waiting for us... I could hazily see the sunlight pouring in through the windows. It was bright, and I had to squint for a while, but my eyes adjusted.

“Well, it is nice to see that you yet live, Christian.” said Celestia, earning an angry look from Luna, and a confused look from me.

“Is… that my name?” I asked, trying to bring her into focus, but my blurry vision would not allow it.

“Yes, it is. We have prepared a carriage to take you to Ponyville, it will leave when you are ready. We’ve also had the royal tailor prepare some garments for you.” said Luna, levitating said garments over to me. “You can change on the way there.” I took the bundle of clothing, then looked at her.

“I… want to walk..” I said in a determined tone. “I haven’t walked in as long as I can remember… I want to walk now.” I said, sliding of the guard and onto my feet. I stumbled at first, but I stood my ground. I took a confident step towards the princesses, but my knees buckled, and I fell to the floor. “I have to walk now…” I said, pushing myself off the floor, and getting back to my feet, taking more steps forward, pulling something out of my tattered robes.

“GUARDS!” yelled Celestia, but Luna only tapped her with a hoof, and pointed back to me. I was walking, albeit very wobbly, with a piece of parchment in my hand, extended towards them.

“Could.. Could you deliver this to Pinkie?” I asked when I was so close I could have touched them. I had written it a few days earlier, because Luna had assured me I would be free soon.

“Of course. We will have our fastest messenger carry it whilst you are on your journey.” said Luna, levitating it over to a pegasus guard, who took it in his mouth, and bolted away. “We will also have a detachment of guards guide you on your way, and make sure you get there safely.” she said, a warm smile on her face. I smiled back.

“Thank you. It.. Means a lot to me.” I said, struggling to find the right words to use. “The words.. I put on that paper… they should make her smile.. I’d like to see her smile.” I said, thinking about how I had never seen her smile in my life, as far could remember. I walked away, stumbling every few steps, but staying on my feet, and sang a song I vaguely remembered, and that brought me hope every time I had thought about just giving up. I walked out the door, accompanied by about two or three guards. As I walked through the streets, I saw many ponies gasp, and lock themselves inside their homes, but I paid them no mind. Some of them threw things at me, most of them missed, but the occasional tomato or glass bottle would find it’s target, and knock me off my balance. I would get back up, though, no matter how many times I fell. I was going home, and nothing was going to stop me. I heard many things said, probably meant to hurt me, or make me mad, but I ignored them.

“Get back in your cage, you beast!”

“They should have killed you when they had the chance!”

“Stay down, you dog!”

“You murderer, they should have sent you to the moon!” I didn’t understand their anger, or some of the words they said, but I ignored them, I drowned them out as I kept up my song, letting it fill my ears over their words.

“I have often dreamed…. Of a far off place.. Where a great warm welcome, will be waiting for me… Where the crowds will cheer when they see my face… and a voice keeps saying.. This where I’m meant to be... I will find my way… I can go the distance… I'll be there someday… If I can be strong I know every mile… Will be worth my while… I would go almost anywhere… To feel like I belong… ” I sang to myself, as the crowds continued to riot against me. One of them must have heard me.

“The only place you belong is in a shallow grave!” they yelled, as they threw a brick at me. I didn’t see it coming until I turned my head to see it was about three inches from my face. Time seemed to slow down for a moment, the ponies were still moving, but they were… slower. As was the brick. I moved my hand, and grabbed the brick. Time slowly returned to normal, and I was met by shocked faces, and guards with swords at my throat. I dropped the brick, and kept walking. I was almost to the gates of the town, and I wasn’t going to stop until I was home. Everything was quiet now. As I walked, ponies slowly inched away from me, and the guards sent to accompany me had deserted me. But I didn’t care. I had a party to attend, and I was seven years late.

> ...And through many trials....
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

A/N: well, well, well, it seems to me like it's time for some crazy shit, as wells as some more sad stuff. Enjoy!


Five days. For five days, I walked. No food. No water. No sleep. No rest of any kind. I just kept walking. What was going through my head? A few things. Was I going the right way? Probably not. Was I going to get the same reception in the town where Pinkie lived as I got when I walked outside for the first time? I hoped not. All I knew for certain was I was going to get somewhere. And that my vision had gotten much better. It wasn’t amazing, and I still couldn’t see that far ahead of me, but I could now see what was directly in front of my face, which was an improvement. However, I was growing tired. I had motivation, but motivation can only carry you oh so far. I was currently walking down the road slower than chameleon, which is saying something. I was dragging my feet, and my knees were shaking. “Come on man, you can make it, only another day or two and you’ll be there!” said a voice, the source of which I had given up on finding. After the third day, I had began seeing and hearing things that weren’t there. I had heard fireworks, seen others like me, beckoning for me to follow.. At night, I would hear the howling of wolves. I looked to my left to see another like me, walking the same path. He had short brown hair, and dark brown eyes that still held their shine. His face was free of facial hair, and the wrinkles, scars, and many other gruesome things I had seen upon my own in my reflection in the occasional puddle, and he had a pair of glasses sitting upon his nose. He was looking at me with a reassuring smile, but I could see the worry in his eyes. He put his hand upon my shoulder. “Don’t give up. You made a promise, remember?”

“Yes, I do, but… It’s so far… and I’m so tired.. Maybe just a quick rest..” I said, collapsing onto my knees, my head hung in defeat. I still clung to the garments Luna had given to me, but they were now covered in dirt, mud, and bits of the rotten fruit that had been thrown at me. I began to cry. “I’m… I’m sorry, Pinkie.. I’m so sorry.. I sent you that letter.. I told you I was coming… but I don’t think I can make it..” I said, falling completely to the ground, and rolling onto my back. I couldn’t carry on anymore. My legs could carry me no further. I looked up into the night sky, and saw the crescent moon, hanging there in the sky. “The… Moon? It’s… just as I imagined.. Has it been there this whole time?” I asked myself.

“Yes, it has. Now get up! I am ashamed of you!” yelled the other, standing over me, looking at me with what looked like a mixture of anger and pity. “How many times do I have to tell people this… Don’t make a promise if you can’t keep it!” he said, putting two of his fingers to the bridge of his nose. Then I heard another voice. One more familiar, though I couldn’t quite place it.

“Christian? That you? Come on, stop being a wuss! Get up! The you I knew wouldn’t give up like this!” came the voice… it sounded more… like a mare. I rolled slowly onto my chest, and pushed up enough for me to look up to the source of the voice… only to see a rainbow manned cyan pegasus, her purple eyes staring directly into mine, a weak smile on her face.

“Who… who are you?” I asked, bringing a sad look to her face.

“You… You don’t recognize me?” she asked, and I could have sworn I saw tears well up in her eyes.

“No, of course he doesn’t. I’d bet money he doesn’t even know who I am.” said the other, whom she seemed to ignore.

“I..I don’t know.. Should I?” I asked, not knowing who I was speaking to.

“Y-Yeah.. You should.. After all we went through together..” she said, tears rolling down her cheeks.

“I… I’m sorry..” I said, letting my head droop down in defeat. “Please don’t cry.. I’m tired of ponies crying around me..” I said, as I felt tears well up in my own eyes.

“What happened to you? What happened to the guy I knew who didn’t apologize? Who only needed forgiveness from god, and nopony else? What happened to the guy who didn’t care what anyone else thought?” she asked, audibly crying. I simply rolled back onto my back in defeat.

“I don’t know. He sounds like he was really close to you, though.” I said, closing my eyes for a moment… then it hit me. I Remembered Pinkie describing Rainbow Dash to me… “Wait a minute…” I said, rolling over again, and looking back to her. “Are you… Rainbow Dash?” I asked, which seemed to make her perk up a bit.

“Y-Yeah… you remember?” she asked, to which I could only shake my head.

“No… but that nice mare who came to visit me, Pinkie, told me a lot about you… she said we were really close friends.. And then you died, and I got really sad, and they locked me in that cage… and they’d sometimes take out the whips.. Or strap me to that table, the one that stretches you, and moves your bones until they pop, or snap...” I said, shuddering and crying at the memory of the torture I endured, all for reasons unknown to me. I looked at my hands, and the gaps where fingers once were. I heard Rainbow gasp slightly.

“B-But why?”

“I… I don’t know.. I don’t remember.. I don’t remember anything beyond the shadows of my cage, and the laughs of the guards as I screamed…. MAKE  IT STOP!!” I yelled through gritted teeth as I put both of my hands to my head, writhing in phantom pain. I could feel it all over again. Each whip-lash, cutting into the flesh of my back. Each racking, pulling my arms and legs until they popped out of their sockets, or broke. Each shock spell, sending volts of electricity rushing through my body, bringing unknown amounts of pain. Each finger, severed slowly while I screamed, begging for it to stop. Then it was over. I simply lay there, alone, crying, begging torturers who weren’t there to leave me be, eyes shut tight. “Please. Please, just make it stop… what did I do wrong?” I opened my eyes, and through the blur of my tears, I saw an extended hand.

“Take it. Let me help you up.” said the voice I recognized as the other. I obeyed, grasping his hand with all my might as he pulled me back onto my feet.

“Th-thank you.” I said, not knowing who he was, or why he was so encouraging. “Why? Why are you helping me? Everyone else seems to not want me around..” I said, to which he only smiled.

“Because you made a promise. And I keep my promises.” he said, walking away, disappearing into the moonlit night, humming an eerily familiar tune.
> ... We will be reunited.
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

I couldn’t comprehend what he had said for a while. I simply stood, looking to where he had been, wondering what he had meant. I was like that until the sun rose, and then it hit me. “He… was me. He was me, from before.. He was.. Happy..” I said, a smile cracking my face. “Like he said, I keep my promises.” I said, turning to walk further down the road, coming face to face with a signpost. “Ponyville… one mile?” I asked myself, looking to my right to see a town in the distance. I felt kind of pathetic after I gave up so easily when it was right there. I set off again, clothes in hand, and a new energy filling my body, like someone had given me an adrenaline shot. I was hobbling there, almost at a run, just on the edge of town, when I first heard the sound of a slamming and locking door. As I walked through town, I heard and saw it more often, ponies looking out their windows, scooping up their children, and locking themselves inside. It wasn’t what I had expected. I was soon walking through the streets aimlessly, not knowing where “home” was, or if I even had one. Eventually, I heard crying. Not a frightened crying, or anything I would have figured with the welcome I received, it was more… a mournful crying. I looked around until I saw somepony sitting under a tree on a hill. I sighed. I didn’t want to frighten them, but it was obvious they needed comfort, so I walked towards them. When I got closer, I noticed it was a pegasus mare(or would she still be considered a filly?), couldn’t be out of her teens, orange coat and purple mane and tail, sitting in front of what looked like a gravestone. I knew what one looked like, as I had often been shown my own, carved ahead of time for the day I died of age, disease, or torture. She didn’t notice me approach, or sit down next to her. “What’s wrong?” I asked, only to see her whip her head around to look at me, fear in her eyes. I assume she thought I was going to harm her, but I had no such intentions. After she took in the fact that I was there, she simply looked away again.

“Well, a few years ago somepony really close to me went to go help fight Discord… She didn’t come back alive.” she said, wiping away some tears.

“Well, I’m sorry to hear that..” I said, looking up into the sky through the tree branches. “You know.. At least you had them while you did, right?” I asked, hoping to cheer her up, but to no avail.

“Yeah, but she’s gone now.. I didn’t even get to say goodbye..” she said, still sounding downcast.

“Yeah, I know how it is..” I said, looking down at the ground.

“No, you don’t! you have no idea what it’s like to lose somepony that close to you!” she yelled, standing up. I only sighed.

“Well, at least you always had somepony who was nice to you, right? Nopony was ever nice to me, until Pinkie talked to the princess. She tells me I did, that I used to have lots of friends, but I haven’t met any of them..” I said, trying to make her understand that someone always has it just as bad, if not worse. She only sat back down, looking at me, dumbfounded.

“What do you mean she told you you had friends?” she asked, sounding confused.

“Well, she says that it’s because of how long I was alone, it made me just forget everything else… But I don’t really wanna talk about that.” I said, really just wanting to not talk about that cage again.

“Oh… What’s your name?” she asked out of the blue.

“My name’s Christian. What’s yours?”

“Scootalo.” she said, the tears on her face now dried. She stuck out her hoof, and I shook it. Then I remembered my purpose for coming to town in the first place.

“Hey, you don’t happen to know where Pinkie Pie lives, do you?” I asked, standing up. She stood up too, and pointed back into town.

“Yeah, she lives over there in Sugercube Corner. You can’t miss it, since it’s the only building that looks like it’s made of candy.” she said with a slight laugh.

“Thanks Scootalo. It means a lot to me.” I said, waving to her as I walked away. She was right, to. It did kinda stand out. I walked up to the door, and knocked on it. I heard some scuffling around, a bit of yelling, and the sound of hoof clops coming towards the door. Then it opened, revealing a yellow earth pony stallion with an orange mane. He wasn’t happy to see me at all. He scowled at me.

“We don’t want you around here. Leave before I call the guards.” he said, going to slam the door, but I stopped it with my hand. He looked at me, worried now.

“I just wanted to see Pinkie… Is she in?” I asked, at least wanting to see her before I as run out of town. That question was answered with a kick to my crotch and a slammed door. I fell to the ground, in pain that, while not as intense as anything else I had felt, somehow hurt more. It’s hard to explain.

“I’ll take that as a no..” I groaned, laying on the ground for a while. When the pain subsided(yes I still use big words.), I stood back up, wondering what to do now. I looked around, seeing many ponies watching me out their windows. I sighed, hung my head, and began to walk away. “It’s obvious I’m not wanted here.. I guess I’ll just go somewhere quiet and sleep for a while..” I said, feeling a combination of anger, pain and dejection. Then I heard something break from inside Sugercube Corner, and turned around just in time to see a pink blur hit me in the chest, knocking me to the ground.

“Here’s that great warm welcome, you wanted!” Pinkie yelled in my ear as she clung to my gut, making me cringe and laugh at the same time. I looked at her, a smile on my face as I hugged her back. Then she buried her face in my chest. “I missed you..” she whispered, and I could feel tears soak through my shirt.

“I missed you too, Pinkie.” I said, running a hand through her mane. We just kinda sat there like that for a while, until I thought of something. “Hey, Pinkie, you should introduce me to your friends.” I said, not remembering their names. “I want to meet them.”

“OHMYGOSHWHATASUPERDUPERLOOPERIDEA!” she yelled as she sprang into the air and bolted off in no specified direction. I had a bad feeling that it wasn’t going to get any better from here on in, but I got to see Pinkie without bars between us, so it was a good day, don’t you think?
> Accepted......
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

A/N: alright everyone, I know this chapter is coming extremely late, and it's probably not the best I've made, but I hope you enjoy it anyway.

I simply stood there while I waited for Pinkie to show up with her friends. I had to admit, I wasn’t entirely sure how it would go, considering the welcome I got when I walked into town, but I was content. Until I felt something kick in one of my knees, that is. “Well ah’ll be. How’d you worm your way outta this one, eh?” asked a feminine voice. “Did ya jus’ tear the guards to shreds, or did ya sneak outta prison?” she asked. I simply rolled onto my back to find myself looking at an orange earth pony.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about miss.” I said, grunting in pain. “I was released. The princess herself-”

“Oh well now ah’ve heard it all. Ya’ll really expect me ta believe princess Celestia herself let ya just walk out the door after what you did?” well, I didn’t know what I did, but if it was causing problems like this I felt I should know. So I asked.

“What did I do!?” I yelled as I started to get to my feet. “What did I do to deserve this kind of treatment!?” I asked, looking at her with the best pleading eyes I could muster. I guess they worked.

“Ya’ll killed two of mah best friends, is what ya did!” she yelled back. I froze.

“I… I did?” I asked, stumbling back and falling onto the ground. I think my knee might have been broken.

“Yeah, ya did! What, are we just not important enough fer ya ta think about much!? Ah thought that was what prison was for!” she yelled, getting louder. I just sat there, tears silently finding their way down my face.

“I’m sorry…. I never should have left…”

“What was that? Ah didn’t quite catch that. Ah coulda sworn ya’ll just had the audacity ta apologize ta me. Could ya say it again?” she asked, sounding kind of smug.

“I said, I’m sorry.”

“Ah’m sorry, ah’m sorry, what was that?” she asked, getting her face really close to mine. I was getting kind of angry.

“I SAID I’M SORRY, YOU FUCKING WHORE! WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT FROM ME!” I yelled, my temper getting the best of me as I stood back up and started walking away.

“Hey! An’ just where do you think you’re going after somethin’ like that!?” she yelled after me.

“Back to the castle, where I belong. Like you said, I apparently killed some of your friends. And besides, it’s obvious that the only pony who will accept me is Pinkie. Whatever. If you see her, tell her I’m sorry I had to leave so soon, and that I never got to meet her friends. They sounded like nice ponies. Unlike you.” I said, choking back tears as I walked away.

“Wait, what?” she asked me, sounding confused. I didn’t care, though. I didn’t feel like wasting my time with her, so I ignored her and kept walking. “Hey! Don’t you walk away from me! Now tell me just what tha hay yer talkin’ bout!” she said, rushing in front of me. I sighed. I figured there was no way out of it, so I explained it to her. How Pinkie would come visit me, and tell me about all the nice friends she had, and about the great big party we’d have when I got out, and how she convinced the princesses to let me go early. 

Then she wanted more detail, what I could and couldn’t remember, what exactly they did to me(which I avoided, for obvious reasons). By the time I was done, she was just staring at me with a dumbfounded expression on her face. She opened and closed her mouth a couple times, trying to find the right words to say(I assume). “Ah-ah don’t know what ta say….. Ah’m sorry…. Look, ah guess ya’ll don’t remember me, but mah name’s Applejack, ah’m one’a Pinkie’s friends….. We was friends once too, years an’ years ago…” she said, a guilty look on her face. I didn’t know what to say, and so we sat there in silence for a moment.

“Hey! I see you already met Applejack!” I heard off to my left, and I turned to see Pinkie walking towards us, a white unicorn with a purple mane in tow.

“Yeah, we’ve been talking for a while.” I said, which wasn’t a complete lie, but it still made me feel a little guilty.

“Well this saves me from having to go find her!” Pinkie said, a wide smile on her face, which made me laugh a little. “Oh, I almost forgot, this is Rarity!” she said, using one of her hooves to point to her companion. I nodded to her, but she only gave me a look of disgust.

“Oh my, those clothes! They’re simply horrid!” she said, making me laugh even more. I couldn’t remember ever meeting her, but for some reason it sounded like something she would say. Everypony just gave me odd looks for a moment before Pinkie spoke up again. “Well come on everyone, we need to get ready for the party!” she said, bolting off before any of us could say a word.

“How does she do that?” I asked, confused by her speed. I mean who wouldn’t be confused by a sudden pink blur?

“It’s Pinkie Pie sugercube, it’s best not ta ask questions.” Applejack said with a laugh. “Now c’mon, lets get ya cleaned up a bit. Ah’m not one fer fancy stuff, But ya’ll look like ya could use a good haircut, at least.”

“Oh, and a nice suit! I can see it now! Come, darling, we have no time to waste!” Rarity said, and I suddenly felt myself being pulled off the ground, enveloped in a magical grip. I felt happy. I felt accepted. But somewhere, deep in the recesses of my mind there was something else. A memory. A promise made long ago. An urge. A desire.


A deal.
> ..... Or am I?
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Rarity and Applejack had taken me to the local barber shop and, after assuring him that I wasn’t going to kill him, got me a shave and a haircut. Looking into the mirror, I saw my face for the first time in a long time. I’d seen my reflection in puddles on the way to town, sure, but without so much hair I looked completely different. I rubbed my chin, feeling the slightly wrinkled skin against my finger tips and smiled. “My, you do look much better now.” Rarity said. I looked back at her to see her smiling as well. “But you still need some more fitting clothes, those rags simply will not do.” she said, to which I nodded. Then I remembered the clothes Luna had given me and started looking around in a panic.

“Oh no, I lost them!” I yelled, putting my hands to the sides of my head. “Princess Luna gave me clothes, and I lost them.”

“Ya’ll lookin’ fer these?” I heard Applejack say, and looked towards the door to see her standing there with them on her back. “They were liein’ in tha road. They’re a lil’ tattered an’ dirty though. Ah know somepony won’t allow that though.” She said, and we all laughed, though mine was half-hearted. I didn’t feel like I belonged. Even with the slight welcome I had, I felt like an outcast. I sighed as we stepped outside.

“Come now darling, let’s get you some real clothes, before the ones you’re wearing fall off.” she said, giggling at her own joke as we walked towards her shop. As we walked, I felt something nagging at me, way in the back of my head.

Christian. I looked around, looking for the source of the voice. It sounded evil and threatening, but somehow familiar and welcoming at the same time. You gave your word, Christian. You can not escape it now. A pact was made, and must be kept. We will speak again soon, my friend. I heard it say with a chuckle as it faded away.

“You alright there buddy? Looks like ya’ll seen a ghost.” I snapped my head to the side to see Applejack looking at me worriedly.

“Y-Yeah. Yeah I’m fine.” I said as we stepped through the door to Rarity’s shop.

“This is the Carousel Boutique! Wait right here while I get some fabric and some measuring tape. I will be back shortly.” She said, wandering off to the back room. Applejack said she had some important stuff to do at home and left, so I was alone in the waiting room. For what seemed like an eternity, I thought, trying to remember anything that voice could have been talking about. I thought I was about to breach that barrier between what I could and couldn’t remember when Rarity came back, several things wrapped in her magic. “Now, if you could just stand up on this stage right here, we can begin.” she said, sounding happy as could be.

“Alright, sure.” I said as I stood up and took my place. She took my measurements and started working on the outfit.. While the fabric was wrapped around me. She occasionally poked me with a pin, but apologized immediately after, though the apology never sounded that sincere. Soon, we were done.

“Alright, step down while I go put the finishing touches on these.” she said, carrying a bundle into the back room with all her other supplies.

So innocent… Or is she? She hates you. She wants your blood, and if you’re not careful she will have it. the voice came again. I looked for its source, only to be met with nothing yet again. You will not find me. Not yet, anyway. We will meet again, old friend. It’s been far too long since we spoke. Ta ta!

“Alright, all done. There’s a bathroom over there where you can change.” She said as she walked out with the same bundle of clothing, pointing towards a door not far away.

“Thank you rarity, you have no idea how much this means to me.” I said with a smile as I stood and took the bundle in my hands, feeling the soft fabric as I walked towards the door. When I opened it, I was met with a sterile white room, large even by my standards. I set the clothing down on the sink-top and stared into the mirror for a moment. Outside, I heard a door open and close, indicating that Rarity had left.

“Well, now that she’s gone, we can talk.” I heard the voice, but blinked a couple times, trying to comprehend what I saw. When I opened my eyes again, my reflection was no longer my own, but that of a demonic figure, with the parts of many different creatures that I could not name. “Oh, come now, don’t look at me like that. We are friends, aren’t we Christian?”

“I-I guess so…. Who are you?” I asked. The figure in the mirror sighed and face palmed.

“I guess seven years is a long time after all.” it said, sounding disappointed. “Well, let me introduce myself again: My name is Discord, immortal god of chaos. And you, my friend, need a refresher.” It said. Before I could say anything it reached out of the mirror, placing a claw between my eyes. 

Suddenly I was in unbearable pain as I saw many things flash before my eyes. Death. Blood. Feeding. Pain. Love. Loss. Joy. Despair. Laughing. Crying. So many things rushed into my mind. When it was done, I found myself on the floor, looking up, gasping for breath.

“Well, how do you feel?” he asked, and I stood up, looking at my hands for a moment, turning them over a couple times.

“I feel just fan-fucking-tastic. What do you want this time, eh?” I asked, looking Discord in the eye. I was kinda pissed off, and had a splitting headache.

“Oh, I just wanted to tell you a few things.” he said coyly.

“Such as?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Nothing too major. That you’re uglier than you were before, you smell bad, you’re destined to be my replacement, and….. Oh yes…. YOU killed Rainbow Dash.” everything else he said slipped past me at the end. More memories flashed by of the rainbow manned pegasus mare. I died a little inside.

“……W-what?”

“Oh yes. Did you really think I had the power to make a duplicate of you? No no no, it was all in your head, my dear boy.” he said with a chuckle as I backed up. I soon found myself against a wall.

“No. No, you’re lying! You have to be!” I yelled as I watched him slither his way out of the mirror.

“Oh no… I can show you what really happened.” He said, and with a snap of his fingers, we were there.

In the Everfree forest.

And what I saw made me regret remembering anything.

“You came back for me?” I heard the familiar voice and looked around for the source. I saw Rainbow dash standing on the all-too-familiar path.

“Of course I did. I was worried about you. Come on, let‘s go.”

“That’s not how it went….. Is it?” I asked as I followed behind the past versions of Rainbow and myself. I didn’t know what to think. On one hand, Discord could be toying with my head, making me feel like I have no chance at redemption…. But on the other, it seems like something he would do, make me remember something, only for the reality to be something else entirely.

“Do you have any idea where we’re going?”

“Of course I do. It’s just up here, I saw it through the trees on my path.”

“Okay…. I trust you.”

“She trusted you…. And where did that get her?” I turned to see Discord looking over my shoulder.

“Why are you showing me this? This isn’t real…. It can’t be real…..” I said, though I didn’t really believe it myself. Suddenly time seemed to speed up, and we were at the ancient temple, where the elements of harmony had originally been found.

“So glad you could make it, old friend. But… you seem to have broken the rules…”

“No…..”

“Oh, yes indeed.”

“I know Discord. But what the fuck are you gonna do about it?" the past me asked, drawing my sword. I shook my head in disbelief.

“No, no, no, no, NO!”

“Well, cheaters must be punished…. But you’re not really cheating, now are you? You’re like me…. Above the rules…. Part of MY team…”

“Christian, what’s he talking about?" Rainbow said, sounding nervous. It broke my heart.

“Nothing. Nothing at all." the past me said, circling around behind her. Then, I dropped my sword and caught her in choke hold.

“DAMN IT NO!” I said, tears starting to fall down my face. “This can’t be real…… It can’t be.” I could hear Rainbow choking, begging for an answer, begging for help from the very person who was killing her. I could do nothing but watch and wonder how this could happen. I saw Fluttershy cowering in the background. No wonder she tried to kill me.

“Goodbye, Rainbow Dash.” the past me said before jerking his arm to the left. There was an ungodly snapping sound….. And she was still.

“No…. No, I didn’t do that… I couldn’t have done that…”

“Oh, but you did. And you will do it to the others too.” Discord said, snapping his fingers again. We were back in the bathroom. I was on my hands and knees, tears falling from my face to the floor.

“No… I won’t… I can’t….. They trust me…”

“Just like Rainbow trusted you?” he said with a chuckle. “How about this. Like I said earlier, you are destined to replace me. Everything that happened after Rainbow died actually happened. So, technically, I am dead. But, by Equestrian law, I am allowed to try to tempt someone into becoming my replacement.” he said, grabbing me by the shoulders and lifting my to my feet. We were eye to eye. “I’ll give you until after this party they’re throwing for you. If you don’t do it then, you’ll never hear from me again. Deal?” he asked, backing up and extending his paw.

“I won’t do it.” I said, determination in my voice.

“Then you’ll never see Rainbow Dash alive again. Pity. I always thought you two would have made a nice couple.” he said with a chuckle before disappearing in a flash of light. I sighed heavily before putting my new clothes on. I didn’t like the situation, but I didn’t really have a choice of rather or not I was in it. When I was done getting dressed, I looked into the mirror again. My hair was still white, but it was shorter now, like a buzz cut. I was wearing a black suit with a white button up shirt, and a rainbow striped tie. It made me feel like shit with what I knew now. I sighed again.

“How do I keep getting myself into this kind of shit?” I asked my reflection. I didn’t expect a response, and I didn’t receive one. I opened the door and walked out to find the boutique empty. I felt something in one of the pockets, and reached in to find a pack of cigarettes with a note taped to it.

Thought you might want these. I hear they help with stress and depression.
- Discord.

“What a smart ass.” I whispered with a chuckle as I stepped outside, crumpling the note and tossing it aside. I opened the pack to find a lighter inside and only three smokes. “Well, that’s not much help right there.” I said, putting one in my mouth and lighting it. I inhaled the smoke, then exhaled it again with a sigh as I leaned against the outside window of the store.

“Well well well, look who’s havin’ their first smoke!” I looked over to see Applejack standing not far away.

“Not so much. They gave us smokes in prison, you know.” I said, my voice monotone.

“Yeah, ah know. Ah jus’ never figured ya’ll fer the type at smoke ‘em.”

“Looks can be deceiving.”

“Yer actin’ kinda funny. Somethin’ happen while ah was gone?” she asked. I let out more smoke with a heavy sigh.

“I remember.”

“Remember what?”

“Everything. I remember you. I remember Rarity. I remember Twilight. I remember Fluttershy. I remember Pinkie….. I remember Rainbow Dash.” I said, choking up at the end.

“Does that mean ya remember why you were tryin’ at do us all in?”

“Yeah.”

“Ya’ll gonna try it again?” I hesitated for a moment. Was I?

“No. and if I was, I wouldn’t tell you, that’s just bad strategy.” I said with a small laugh. She laughed too, but it sounded more nervous.

“Yeah, that wouldn’t be tha best idea ever. Now c’mon mister fancy, let’s get to that party. Ah’m sure Pinkie’ll be excited at hear ya remember everythin’…. then again, she might not be.” she said as she walked towards Sugercube Corner. I nodded, put out my smoke and followed her. It wasn’t too far, so we got there pretty quick. When we walked in, everything was dark. My instincts kicked in, listening for the faintest sound. Then the lights went on, and I was blind.

“SURPRISE!” I heard a few ponies yell. When I could see again, I saw Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie and the Cakes all standing there. Everyone but the Cakes were smiling broadly.

“I think we’ll just let you kids have your fun.” Mrs. Cake said as they walked towards a back door. Pinkie ran up and hugged me again.

“You look great! Did rarity make the suit? I bet she did, she’s always making clothes, even though nopony really wears clothes that much, which doesn’t seem like very good business sense to me, I mean supply and demand and all that stuff right?” she asked, panting heavily. She’d been talking a mile a minute without stopping to breathe. How she does it will forever elude me. “Anyway, you’re not here to talk about business, you’re here for the cake!” she said before I could answer her question, pushing me towards the cake. There was a knife on the table next to it, and it seemed sharp….. “Well, are you just gonna stand there, or are you gonna cut the cake?” she asked. I hesitated picking up the knife, thousands of scenarios rushing through my head. I looked from the cake, to the three ponies behind me and back again.

Do it. Do it now, while they trust you. Your life will be complete again, I promise. I shook Discords voice from my head…. And made a decision.
> I made a desicion, and I regret it
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Promise me… Promise me you’ll never go back to being that monster.

I hear her voice in my head. I could never shake it, even to this day. It reverberates in my head, over and over….. Just like her lullaby. I can’t sleep because of it. You know how ironic that is? A lullaby that keeps you from sleeping?…. It feels like I haven’t slept in centuries…..

I promise, Pinkie.

Pinkie swear?

Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye.

I remember the promise I made all too well…. And how I broke it. That night. With that knife. It still makes me shudder. As I sit atop this golden throne, every pony at my beck and call….. I can’t help but feel like I made the wrong choice. The gold that lines my fingers, the crown that sits upon my brow, the chaos I spread across the world…. It all means nothing to me. The chocolate rain makes me think of Pinkie Pie.

“I’m so….. So sorry.” I whispered to no one in particular as I hung my head. The clothes I wear mean less to me than the now tattered suit that rarity made for me long ago. Full moons mean nothing to me now. In fact time now means absolutely nothing. For what is time when compared to a god?

A god….. I never thought I’d be able to call myself that and not sound like an arrogant prick… But now it’s technically true. Though I think of myself as more of a demon. The memory haunts me, even now that they’re all long dead and decayed.

Are you…. Gonna cut the cake? her voice rings again, and I start to cry.

“Why!? Why did I do it!?” I yelled between sobs.

You did well, old friend.

SHUT UP!

Oh, but such mercy, or lack thereof, requires reward. Oh, I’d gotten my reward alright…. I’ve seen generations of ponies live and die. Laugh, love, cry and hate…. But I never saw Rainbow again. No god has that power, except in illusions. I could conjure and image of her, but I could never take the pain it brought…. Can you believe it? Three hundred years…. And I still have nightmares of that night….

Christian, what are you doing!?

Hold on, ah got ‘im.

No, Applejack, don’t!

She’d been the first to fall… after that, it was all just a blur…. And I couldn’t stand the sight of it. Is immortality worth the price I’ve paid? In the immortal words of Voltaire, “It gets so lonely being evil. What I'd do to see a smile, even for a little while. And no one loves you when you're evil.” and they never do. When they see me, the cringe and kneel in terror. Not once since that day have I seen a legitimate smile. Even my reflection lies to me these days.

But…. It’s all just a day in the life, eh? I mean, I have everything anyone could ever want. Money. Power. Alcohol. Mares, should I so choose….. But none of them make the memory fade. Countless nights, drunk and alone, have seared them into my brain like a cattle brand.

I’ll always be with you…. Right here…

Pinkie, no, I’m so sorry…… Don’t go, please for the love of god, don’t go!

It’s alright…. I’m tired…. I’m gonna take a nap now…..

Pinkie! Pinkie!? No……. No, not again….. Not again…..


A/N: Alright everyone, another split ending this time around. I hope you enjoyed this one(to a reasonable extent, of course)!
> The Kiss Pt.I
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

I sat back in a lawn chair, stretching out my legs a little. The sun felt good, but a guy can only take so much heat. “Hey, you want another glass of lemonade?” I turned to see Pinkie balancing a tray with a couple glasses on her back and smiled.

“Sure Pinkie, that’d be great.” I said as she slid a glass over to me. I grabbed it and took a quick sip, setting it down on a nearby table. “Good stuff.”

“Thank you! I made it myself you know!” she said in her usual energetic tone, causing me to smile more.

“Well who else is gonna make it? It’s not like either of the Cakes ever make lemonade, right?” I asked her, tilting my shades a little bit.

“Oh, you silly, they can’t make anything anymore, they’re too old!” she said with a giggle.

“Exactly.” I said with a laugh.

“So, what do you wanna do later?” she asked, making me think for the first time that day.

“Hm, I don’t really know. We could always go visit Applejack, see how the farms doing.”

“OOH OOH, ooooorrrr, we could go visit that store you really like, see if they have anything new!” she suggested, making me laugh more before drinking more lemonade. It really was good stuff.

“Pinkie, we were there an hour ago, I doubt they have anything new.”

“You have a good point…” She said, sitting in the chair next to mine. “Well, we could always go see how your parents are doing.”

“Pinkie, remember what happened last time we broke the fourth wall?” I asked, shuddering at the memory. Obviously she knew what I was talking about, because she did the same.

“I could never look at Spike the same way ever again. I mean who would have thought him and Applebloom would-”

“I know right? Having to watch until you could get us out of there was horrifying.”

“You know you could have looked away, right?”

“It was like a train wreck Pinkie, I couldn’t look away unless I was puking.” I said, making her giggle some more.

“You were puking a lot while we were there.” she said, making me laugh a little. I looked down at my hooves and sighed.

“You know, sometimes I miss having hands.” I said. I couldn’t help but feel kinda sad looking at my coat. It was as white as my hair had been, but with patches of a light grey . But you could hardly tell the difference. My mane and tail were a combination of a light green-ish yellow and a light yellow-is orange color. And, to top it all off I was a unicorn. Go figure. “Did we have to ask celestia to turn me into a pony?”

“Well, we wouldn’t want everypony thinking you’re different, would we?” Pinkie said with another giggle. “Besides, Lyra wouldn’t stop flirting with you, and we don’t want that, now do we?” she asked, giving me a coy smile. I knew what she was getting at.

“No we wouldn’t babe.” I said with a chuckle. “That was getting annoying, after all. She was always like ‘Oh, I bet you can do all kinds of things with your HANDS’, and ‘Oh, your FINGERS are nice and long, and smooth too’.” I said with a laugh in my best imitation of Lyra. It wasn’t that great.

“You think it was annoying for you? Do you have any idea how many times I had to pull her off to the side and say ‘Hey, those fingers are MINE’?” she said, and we both busted out laughing.

“Oh that was awesome. Have I ever told you how much I loved you for being so damn funny?” I asked jokingly. She put a hoof to her chin in thought.

“Well, you could stand to say it more. And for other things.” she said, shoving me playfully, causing me to fall out of my chair. “Ohmygosh, are you alright?”

“Yeah, I’m fine.” I said with a laugh as I slowly pushed myself up. “It’ll take more than that to keep me down.”

“Oh? How about this!?” she said, jumping on my back before I was fully up, sending me back to the floor again. I groaned a bit, but laughed with her all the same.

“God, maybe I should call the spousal abuse center and report you.” I said jokingly as I tried, with little success, to push myself up again.

“Oh, you know you would never do that. You love me too much.” she said making me laugh again.

“Oh, so you’re saying the thorn is worth the scent of the rose?”

“Who said anything about flowers?” she asked me, legitimately confused. I fell back down laughing, and we ended up rolling around for a while before we found ourselves face to face(or muzzle to muzzle, whichever you prefer). There was a little bit of an awkward silence. Sure, we talked like we were together, and we lived together, but we weren’t dating.

“Sunshine?” she asked, making me smile a little bit. It was her little pet name for me. My actual pony name was Sunlight. Sunlight Struggle. Celestia’s idea of a joke, I imagine.

“Yeah Pinkie?” I asked. At this point, I was above her. We both had pretty blank expressions on our faces, and we were starring into each others eyes. God, I never noticed how blue her eyes were…….

“I…. I don’t really know how to say this….” she said, shifting her eyes to one side and biting her lip a little bit. I was shocked that Pinkie, the most talkative pony I knew, was at a loss for words. But, then again, so was I. I shifted a little to, getting kinda uncomfortable with how awkward this was.

“Just…. Just take your time.” I said. I was pinning her hooves to the ground, but my shifting caused me to allow them just enough space to get free. She smiled and took the opportunity to tackle me. And then she was on top. Take that how you will. Anyway, we looked at each other for a moment, then she slowly lowered her head until our noses were literally touching. She stopped for a moment, seeming unsure.

“I love you.” she whispered, almost too quiet for me to hear.

“I love you too.” I said, just as quiet.

And then.

Our lips.

Collide.

Sorry, I couldn’t help making a None Like Joshua reference. In all honesty though, we slowly began to kiss, cautious at first. Even after twelve years, my self consciousness about women(or mares, rather) never truly faded. But, then, in the heat of the moment, most of that seemed to disappear. I feel her tongue start to poke into my mouth and poke it with mine without thinking. She jumps slightly and breaks the kiss, making me feel like I messed up.

“I-I’m sorry if I took it a little too-” I was hushed by her hoof on my lips.

“I-It’s not you. I….. I just wanna take it slow for a while.” She said with a warm smile before letting out a small giggle. “Would you believe me if I said this was my first serious relationship?” she asked with an awkward smile. I thought for a moment before coming to a realization.

“Would you believe me if I said the same thing?” I asked, giving the same smile, and we both started laughing. She laid down on top of me and we just sat there for a while, enjoying each others company. “We should probably get up soon.”

“Yeah, we probably should.” she replied, but we both just laughed lightly.

I still miss Dash, yeah, but in retrospect….. This was worth passing on Discords offer for.
> The Kiss Pt. II(Final Chapter)
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

A/N: I realize this is probably one of the cheesiest chapters I've ever written. I'm okay with that. I hope you guys are too. Enjoy.

Fifteen years. Fifteen years I’ve been in this world of colorful and happy ponies. I’m now thirty-one, but I still feel so much older. I still think back and wonder if I made the right decisions. I wonder if signing that contract was worth all the pain I’ve suffered. I wonder if Discord was telling the truth when he said that I killed Rainbow. Sometimes, thinking back real hard I vaguely remember doing the deed, but I’ve always dismissed it as more of his tricks. I still wonder how things would have turned out for this world if I’d never come here.

But then I look at Pinkie, and all my worries, all my doubts seem to melt away.

I’d been saving up money from every little side job I could get for a couple years, just for that moment. I can still remember it as if it were yesterday.
**********************

As I said, I’d been saving up money for a couple years. Pinkie was running Sugercube Corner then, and she brought in enough cash to pay for necessities, though I still chipped in what I could spare. I was saving up for something special, something I didn’t want her to know about just yet. “Sunshine, where are you going?” She asked me as I walked towards the door. It was mid-afternoon, but it was still chilly out since it was autumn.

“Just out for a little bit babe, I’ll be right back.” I said, wondering if she’d caught on. She gave me a dirty look, and I instantly knew what she was thinking, but I couldn’t say anything without increasing her suspicion or telling her what I was going out for. Neither of which were really an option.

“Okie-Dokie-Lokie.” she said in that tone between angry and suspicious. That tone always scared me. I simply nodded and stepped outside into the chilly air, shivering slightly as I walked into town. She’d been thinking I’d been having an affair with Rarity for a while, but hadn’t asked either of us about it. Which made no sense, since I couldn’t stand her at all. But, such is the logic of Pinkie Pie. Anyway, I passed some of my new friends, and a couple fans, on the way to my destination. Where was I going?

The jewelry store.

We’d been together for almost three years, and I figured it was time to pop the question. I was nervous about it, but I was fairly confident in how it would turn out. When I got to the store, the clerk smiled at me.

“Finally picking up that ring you’ve been looking at Mister Struggle?” she asked, making me laugh a little.

“Yes ma’am. Today’s the day.” I said, placing a bag of bits on the counter with a smile. She smiled back, pulling the earring out from under the counter and placing it in a small box and sliding it across the counter.

“I’m sure she’ll say yes. She’s always talked about you in that sunshine-and-butterflies type of way.” she said with a giggle. I sighed a little.

“Yeah, well trying to keep this my little secret hasn’t done me any favors. Thanks, though.” I said with a wave as I took the box in my magic and walked out the door. I smiled a little bit as I walked home. I was gonna pop the question as soon as I got home. I was too nervous to wait for a day or two. I had to do it then, or I’d lose my nerve. I smiled a little more when I saw Sugercube Corner in sight. “I’m back.” I said as I stepped through the door, holding the box behind my back. I heard a quiet sobbing from the living room and walked in to see Pinkie sitting on the couch with piles of tissues around her. “Babe, what’s wrong?” I asked. She snapped around to look at me, and it broke my heart to see her eyes filled with tears.

“N-nothing Sunlight. I-I’m fine, really.” she said, looking away from me. She almost sounded angry.

“Pinkie, it’s obvious there’s something bothering you.” I said, stepping closer. A bit slowly, since I was never really sure if she’d go ‘Cupcakes’ on me in a situation like that. Her mane was down, and she was in damn near full Pinkamena mode. Which scared me.

But, that was when she snapped. The flood gates that were her eyes opened up, letting lose an unnatural amount of tears. Remember Celestia and Luna’s reunion in the second episode? Yeah, she was crying like that again.

“You don’t love me anymore!” she yelled. I just looked at her with the most confused face I’ve ever had. And that’s saying something.

“What makes you think that?” I asked as I got a little closer.

“You’re never home anymore…. And I’ve seen you hanging out with Rarity a lot… So why don’t you go live with her instead, huh?” she asked between sobs. If she hadn’t been crying, I’m sure she’d have sounded pissed beyond all known anger. I sighed.

“Well, I guess it’s now or never.” I said with a chuckle. She looked at me with a face of confusion that rivaled my own. I smiled a little bit and kneeled, pulling the box from behind my back. Her eyes went wide.

“That isn’t……..” she started, but never finished.

I slowly opened the box, and watched her eyes grow wider, which used to bother me but at that point I’d gotten used to it. “Pinkie Pie… Will you marry me?” I asked with a sheepish smile. Instead of answering, she decided to tackle me.

Onto the coffee table.

Which broke.

When we finally managed to remove ourselves from the debris, she threw her hooves around my neck, hugging me to the point I couldn’t really breath. “YESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYES!!!!!” she yelled in my ear. God, love seems to come with so much physical pain these days.

“Pinkie…..Can’t……. Breath…..” I gasped, causing her to let me go. I fell to the floor, gasping for breath. When I could actually breath easy again, I stood back up. “Well, besides the back breaking hug I am now very happy and content.” I said with a laugh. Her response was to punch(or would it be kick?) me in the shoulder.

**********************
TWO MONTHS LATER
**********************

Wedding day. People, and ponies, always say that it’s one of the most nerve wracking moments in anyone’s life. They’re not lying. I was sweating, and it was damn near winter. I was standing at the altar, waiting for Pinkie to walk down the aisle. We were in a large cathedral by insistence of Princess Celestia. There were stained glass windows of her and her sister everywhere, making me wonder just how self absorbed Celestia was. Ponies were talking throughout the room. My best stallion turned to me and whispered in my ear.

“Listen bro, I know you love her and everything, but she’s fucking crazy. You sure this is the best idea?” he said, making me chuckle quietly.

“I know I’ve never had good ideas, but neither have you. Besides, she’s not that crazy once you get to know her.” I said. He just shook his head and took his position again. And not a moment to soon, either since Pinkie had just stepped into the aisle. I have to say, she looked beautiful. She was wearing her Gala dress with an added pink veil, which made me smile. She was lead up the aisle by her aging father, who shot me a look that said ‘you break her heart, I break your horn’. I nodded to him, and he nodded back. Message received. When they finally reached the altar, her father walked back to his seat and sat down, for once since I’d met him showing a smile.

Then Celestia showed up, nearly giving me a heart attack.

“I take it you’ve been good these past years my friend?” she whispered, looking at me with a sly grin. I chuckled a little.

“I don’t think I’d be here if I hadn’t.” I whispered back.

“Well then, let’s not waste time.” she said. We stood there for a while, while Celestia performed her speech.

“Do you, Pinkie Pie, take this stallion to be your lawfully wedded husband? For better or for worse, through sickness and in health, ‘till death do you part?” celestia asked, looking at Pinkie with a warm smile. Pinkie nearly squealed with joy.

“I do!”

“And do you, Sunlight Struggle, take this mare to be your lawfully wedded wife? For better or for worse, through sickness and in health, ‘till death do you part?” she asked, turning her gaze towards me. I looked at her for a moment and then shifted my gaze to Pinkie. She smiled. I smiled back.

“I do.”

“Then, by the power vested in me, by me,” she said with a small giggle. “I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride.” she said, stepping back a little. I used my magic to lift Pinkie’s veil to see a very happy face with tears of joy streaming down them. Or at least I saw it for a second. The next thing I knew our lips were locked and we were kissing passionately. I could hear cheers in the background, but the noise seemed to dim until I couldn’t hear anything. Then the kiss was broken, and the sensation of sound returned.

“So where should we go for our honeymoon, I’ve always wanted to go to Fillydelphia, or maybe we could go to Jamaica! I’ve always wanted to go to Jamaica!” she started talking a mile a minute I picked her up in my magic and carried her towards our carriage outside.

********************************

And that was about a month ago. Right now we’re in Jamaica. Who knew there was a Jamaica in Equestria too?

“What’re you waiting for, silly? The show’s about to start!”

Oh, shit, umm, heh, this is awkward. Wait a minute, you guys can’t see this anyway……

“Who are you talking to?”

Nopony Pinkie, I’ll be right there. Gotta go guys. Duty calls.
> BONUS CHAPTER: Interview with a god
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Weren't expecting that, now were you?" he asks. You simply sit there, not entirley knowing what you've just heard. You'd been invited here to have an exclusive interview with Equestria's ruler....

But you weren't expecting this.

"I-I'm sorry mister" he cuts you off with a wave of his hand.

"Please. Call me Christian. I've dealt with enough formality." he says, standing from his throne, clasping his hands behind his back as he walks towards a window, looking out it sullenly. "Let me guess, you were expecting a tale of vengence. Of anger. Of doing the right thing. Some huge rebellion. Not the tale of a lonley child, who lived what was left of his childhood in pain and agony." he says, not looking at you. "Am I right?"

"Y-yes mis-" you catch yourself. "I mean, Christian. But, if you weren't angry, then why did you take over Equestria? Why couldn't you leave it as it was?" you ask. This.... thing before you had ruled for as long as anypony could remember. Under his rule, crops had failed, wars had started and ended, and too many ponies had died. As a foal, you'd heard stories of two princesses, ruling in harmony, but those days must have been long past.

"I never said I wasn't angry. But I wasn't angry with the princesses"

"So you don't deny their existence?" you ask curiously. You've been recording you're entire conversation, though it was mostly him telling his story. 'This will certainly be interesting.' you think as you check your tape recorder.

"I never have. Nopony's asked about them, so I haven't said anything." he says, still looking out the window. "As I was saying, I wasn't angry with them. I was angry with myself, and had no one else to vent my frustrations on." It's late at night, and looking out the window, you see that the moon is full. 

"It's a full moon. Shouldn't you be changing?" you ask. he chuckles lightly.

"One of the bonuses of being a god is that I am immune to disease. All my previous ailments were removed when I became..... this." he says, looking down. You swear you see a tear fall to the floor. You sigh.

"Well, that's a relief. I don't know if I could outrun a werewolf." you say with a chuckle. He chuckles back.

"Few can. Now, a question, if I may." he says, turning and walking back to his throne, sitting upon it once more.

"Sure. Shoot." you say.

"Do you know where the term 'werewolf' is derived from?" he asks.

"Ummm..... No, no I don't." you admit.

"Well let me tell you. It's mostly latin, a language from my world. 'Were' is the latin prefix for 'man', and wolf is obvious, so it roughly translates to 'man-wolf'. Quite fitting, don't you think?" he asks. You nod, not knowing how else to react.

'Why is he telling me this?' you wonder, but your line of thought is cut off by a heavy sigh from him.

"You know, I went back to my world recently. Being what I am, the rules of life, death, and reality no longer apply as they would to most." He says, a sad look on his face. "I thought maybe this world would benifit from my absence, and that maybe I could hide my chaos. Live a normal life, like a normal person. Find my family." he sighs again. "But they were gone. In the time that I've been here, my entire family has died out. Most of my world has died out. There is no such thing as a 'normal person' there anymore. everybody's either insane, dieing, or scared of the other two." he says, shaking his head. You can see the pain in his eyes, and almost feel it yourself. "I never even said goodbye. I can't remember the last thing I said to my mother.... But I know it wasn't pleasent."

"I'm sorry." You say, not knowing what else to say.

"Don't be. It was my decision that made this. I can't change that, and niether can you." He says sullenly. you decide it's time for you to leave, as you can tell he has a lot on his mind.

"One last question, Christian."

"Yes?"

"What is your stance on the ledgend of the mares in the moon? You've been ruling Equestria for three hundred and ninety nine years now. Ledgend states that on the first full moon of the four hundreth year, the stars will aid in their escape, and that they will overthrow you." you say, curious as to his reaction. He looks back to the window.

"Walk with me." he says, getting up and walking towards the window. you follow, wondering what he'll show you. You both look out the window, and you see the familiar pattern in the moon. It looks like two mares, heads low in saddness and defeat.

"So, what is your opinion on the tale?" you ask again, looking at him. His face his hard as stone, unmoving. He's looking intently at the moon, and you wonder what he'll say.

"No comment." he says, not looking at you. You sigh. Your hopes had gotten up, only to be crushed under his heel. But you still have some amazing material, and can take solace in that.

"Well, thank you for the interview, but I should be going." You say, gathering your things and walking away. As you walk down the dark, empty corridor, you hear something. You swear it's his voice, ringing through the halls.

"Soon..... This nightmare will be over."

A/N: just kinda had this idea earlier today, hope you liked it!