> Failing Firmaments
>  by MidKnight Erratum
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Chapter 1: Fallen Twilight
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


Fallen Twilight






The morning sang with the song of birds greeting its sunrise with a jubilant serenade. Peeking through the curtains and crawling across the walls, shimmering off dust as it settled in the stilled air. Books lay strewn across the floor of the attic loft, as Twilight rolled away from the window. Tear stained cheeks covered by darkness as she wallowed in the refuge of the library's cold solace. The scent of breakfast wafted it's way from the kitchen, Spike undoubtedly was preparing something delicious, but she really didn't feel like she deserved anything. She, Twilight Sparkle, had failed. 










Twilight could still see the Princess's disappointment as she stood protective above her sole pupil. It hadn't blossomed from anger, but Celestia's eyes had hinted at a solemn sadness. A pain spanning lifetimes as she turned from Twilight to face Nightmare Moon. 
Beams of darkness reached like tendrils from the black alicorn's horn. Celestia's horn burned with an intensity that rivaled the sun itself. Banishing the darkness in an instant.
The Nightmare stumbled back, shielding her eyes as she began to visibly tremble. 
The shattered crystal fragments slowly rose, joining in orbit as they created a ring that circled Celestia and Twilight. The shattered elements starting to spark as Celestia's magic flowed through them. 
“I will give you one last chance, Nightmare! You're reign of terror has lasted long enough!” Celestia spoke in a booming command. Twilight felt it shake the earth beneath her, as Celestia's shout shook Twilight to the core. Her mentor's usual calm replaced by a bitter fierceness that made the elements spin faster in her agitated magic. 
“Go ahead, Sister!” Nightmare Moon hissed, “You never had the guts before, I doubt a thousand years has changed anythi-!” 
Celestia's rainbow mane sparked, red hot flame climbed the tendrils of hair. Glowing in a solar brilliance, blowing in a billowing breeze, as Celestia's horn beamed brighter. Sparks flew in all directions as the elements orbited, rebinding into planetary bodies that now shimmered. The spark of magic changing them from their prior pale stone complexions. Rewinding time to their once glorious splendors. 
“I'm sorry it has come to this… Sister.” Twilight heard her mentor's words as they whispered by in the arcane display of unfathomable power. As she watched a single tear glide from Celestia's stone gaze to polish the ancient castle's floor. As the magic reservoir burst, spilling like a flood across the room. Swallowing the alicorn of darkness, a single scream pierced the night. Pure agony echoing off the walls, as Twilight watched on in horror. 
As stone began to crackle and crawl across the Nightmare's blackened hooves. Surprise flashed through the demon's eyes, as she began her helpless plea. 
Unheard by the brilliant dawning splendor. Melting away the reign of fear, as the light burst throughout the walls of the crumbling palace. Before vanishing, leaving Twilight to stare on, as if she herself had been turned to stone as well. 
Time passed, seemingly eternities, before the blinding brilliance was broken. 

“I’m sorry, Luna...” Was all Celestia could say, as she continued to stare at the frozen terror of the screaming stone statue that now guarded the ethereal thrones of old. Tears scattered across the earth, as Celestia wept. The elements of harmony gently sank to the ground, before being released from the distraught alicorn's magic. A moment of silence fell between Twilight and her mentor. Finally, with a  heavy sigh, Celestia stood. Clearing her throat before addressing her student. 

“I thought I gave you an assignment, to make friends…” 

Twilight flinched at the accusation. She tried to find her voice, tried to explain. To rationalize her decision she had made. 

“I-I tried… But…” 

“But?!” Celestia asked narrowing her gaze at Twilight. “Of all my students, I had hoped YOU could do more than try…” 
Celestia's words cut like razors through her, as Twilight cowardly knelt in apology. 

“I'm sorry, I could have done better, I could have-” 

“No, YOU couldn't have, not alone. You failed to look past your studies to find friends. You failed your test, and you failed Me, Twilight Sparkle…”

It had felt like Celestia had put every drop of venom in Equestria into those bitter words. As Twilight gulped nervously, glancing at the place the alicorn of darkness had been turned to stone. Petrified without a second thought, by the blazing Sun, that Twilight humbly bowed to.

“I-I… Am… So sorry….” Was all Twilight could manage, as Celestia turned and walked away. 










Now here she was, a failed student. Twilight Sparkle the flunkee, banished to the library of small town, Ponyville. At least she had books to keep her mind busy, but somethings even books couldn't solve. Twilight dove back under the blankets, cowardly hoping she could stay in bed and fall back to sleep. If possible Twilight would've rather melted into oblivion, and stopped existing altogether. Perhaps there was a spell for such a thing, but Twilight didn't have the energy to look for one. 
After all, she had failed Princess Celestia, she was probably being expelled as she lay here. No longer the Princess's promising prodigy, but a laughing stock to all of Canterlot. Tears threatened to spill once more as countless thoughts nagged her. Tormenting whispers that swirled about driving her anxieties, as false conclusions boiled and brewed. Spilling over the brim, and dousing her drive to study, as fresh sobs crawled their way up her throat.
The door squeaked open on elderly hinges, most likely Spike coming to serve her a breakfast she didn't deserve. 
“Go away, I don't feel like eating.” Twilight moaned. Her ears perking, as they were met with the sound of hooves, unexpectedly bouncing across the wooden floor. 

“Well in that case, I guess I shouldn't waste these pumpkin pancakes!” A cheerful voice interrupted the library's silence. 
Something about the voice seemed familiar, but Twilight couldn't quite place the bubbly mare's voice. 

“Go away,” Twilight insisted, trying to hide her crying embarrassment. 

“But if I do that, who's gonna eat these pumpkin pancakes while listening to you pillow pouting?” 
Twilight let out a long haggard sigh, as she felt the mattress rock like an angry ocean. When whoever it was had jumped onto the bed. Followed by the sound of pancakes being murdered feverishly. Twilight poked her head from her cocoon of bedding, letting out an annoyed huff as she found the town's pink party pony licking the plate clean. 

“It's you,” Twilight spoke with a mild disdain. “Of course it would be…” She muttered to herself. Rubbing a hoof to her temples. 

“Well duh,” the cheerful pony said giving Twilight an unwanted hug. “I am, Pinkie Pie, the Superest Duperest Party Pony after all! And pity parties are one of my specialties. I even brought ice cream!”

Twilight wiggled free from the tight embrace. As Pinke began digging through her saddle bag, setting off an explosion of confetti and glitter. That fell slowly to the floor in a flourish of a sparkling mess. Before Pinkie finally found the ice cream, pulling it from the bag in triumph, along with a box of cupcakes. 

“Tada! Isn't it amazing? I always come prepared.” 

“I don't need your ice cream, and now I'm gonna have to clean up this mess on top of all that! Thank you very much.” Twilight protested, sarcasm dripping from her lips like venom. 

“Your welcome,” Pinkie said brandishing a spoon and scooping a giant helping of ice cream. Plopping it onto a cupcake, before devouring it in one swell bite, frosting and all. 
Twilight brushed confetti from her mane in annoyance. Reluctantly accepting an offered cupcake, taking a bite as she felt the sugar coating numb her tongue. 

“I feel nothing,” Twilight said bitterly, helping herself to another cupcake. 

“Do you wanna talk about it?” Pinkie asked, giving Twilight the bucket of ice cream, and a spoon. 

“I mean, what happened last night? You ran off into the forest, all on your own, and a while later the sun came up. Did you defeat Nightmare Moon?” Pinkie gasped as if realizing something amazing. Twilight felt Pinkie's hooves pull her cheeks so she was face to face, a serious expression masking Pinkie's buoyant excitement.

“Are you a… Hero?” Pinkie asked, a grin plastered across her cheeks with overzealous enthusiasm. 

“No,” Twilight replied, fresh emotions welling up, threatening to overflow. “I'm not a hero… Celestia is, she stopped Nightmare Moon.”

“Oooooooooooooh,” Pinkie cooed, waiting for Twilight to continue. “Go on, tell me, was it a super awesome battle of epic proportions?” 

“No, Celestia used the elements to petrify... Luna..." Twilight's heart felt betrayed, as she felt the name cross her tongue without thinking. She was unworthy to utter it, as tears pricked her eyes once more. "She was turned to stone, and it's all MY fault.” 
Twilight collapsed into another fit of blethering sobs. Pinkie rubbed a hoof across Twilight's back in sympathy. Letting silence fall between them. Waiting for Twilight to regain her composure, as she blathered incoherently into her pillow. Eventually Twilight rubbed the last few tears from her eyes, glancing at Pinkie who offered a reassuring smile. 
“Well, I didn't quite catch all that, but getting expelled from a magic school because you don't have any friends, sounds a little ridiculous… But shows what I know about schooling.” Pinkie Pie shrugged, gobbling down another cupcake. 
“I didn't just fail to make friends, I failed Princess Celestia! I was her prize pupil, she trusted me, and I fell through on my responsibility! I'd be lucky if I weren't banished from Equestria!” Twilight slumped off the bed, and began to pace across the floor. 
“I might even get banished, and then thrown in a dungeon in the place that she banished me to… I might even get sent to Tartarus!” Twilight's breathing increased rapidly at the thought, as Pinkie hopped off the bed and placed a hoof on the purple unicorn's shoulder. 
“Calm down, breath…” Pinkie tried to sooth Twilight as she hyperventilated, “I'm sure you'll be fine. Besides, you didn't fail to make friends, cause you got ME. And I'm friends with EVERY-PONY! So maybe you'll get partial credit?” 
Twilight took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. She felt sick, and she felt another wave of emotions fighting to break free.
“Thanks, Pinkie Pie, but I'm afraid tests can't be resubmitted. Especially after the test was taken…” Twilight turned away, sitting on the cold wooden floor. Shivers rocked the unicorn as she wallowed in her despair. Warm hooves reached around Twilight, embracing her in a ginger hug. Twilight felt Pinkies head rest gently against the back of her neck, a hoof ran smoothly through Twilight's disheveled mane. Like a mother comforting a child, trying to make everything right in the world. But Twilight couldn't accept peace, the war of self loathing raged on, despite Pinkie's efforts. 
The door creaked open, and Twilight pushed away from Pinkies embrace abruptly. A little embarrassed at the thought of appearing weak and vulnerable in front of anypony. All of a sudden self conscious of her and Pinkie's actions. 
“Hey, Twilight?” Spikes voice inquired, echoing in the quiet loft. Twilight turned to see him peeking around the door. His eyes prepared to beg for something, like they always did when he wanted something.

“Yeah? What is it Spike?” Twilight asked. 

“I was thinking about going out for a bit, can you keep an eye on the library?... Encase somepony else stops by… Even though I know you've had a rough night...” 

“Fine, I'll watch the library. What are you planning to do?” Twilight asked, inquisitively like a protective older sister. 

“I wanted to go explore the town, and maybe stop by the bakery for some…” His eyes wandered to the bed, and the box of cupcakes lying haphazardly on it. “Ooh, oooh, can I have one… Or three?” 

“Hmmmmm, you can have… One,” Twilight decided, after pretending to think it over. 

“Sweet!” Spike exclaimed, running to the box and grabbing a cupcake. Twilight caught him sneak a second one, and rolled her eyes. 

“Don't forget to say ‘thank you.’” She teased halfheartedly.

“Thanks, Pinkie Pie!” Spike said through his chewing, as he hurried out the door and down the stairs. 

“Well, I gotta get back to the bakery, and YOU got a library to watch.” Pinkie chimed, bouncing to the open door, lingering a few seconds before exiting. 

“I'll be at Sugarcube Corner, stop by and say ‘hi’ to your friend sometime!” Pinkie called as she shut the bedrooms door.

Twilight sighed, levitating the box of cupcakes and ice cream as she sauntered to the door. Deciding to clean the confetti later, as she journeyed into the library. Heading for the kitchen to put the desserts away. The cold hit her like a wall, as she walked through the empty space of book shelves. Twilight used her magic to draw the curtains to let the sunlight in, reviling in the sudden brightness of the late morning sunlight. She turned from the windows, briskly making her way to the kitchen. Levitating the treats into the fridge, as she wandered back out to the front. Deciding to reorganize some of the shelves, but as she set about doing what she loved, her mind wandered. Keeping her from any amount of fulfillment as she did the menial task, of repetitively checking a book and adjusting it based on alphabetical ordering. Hours passed, and Twilight's frustration mounted the precipice of breaking. What was wrong with her today? She loved books, she loved reorganizing. Why did she feel like she was wasting time, why did she feel so unproductive? 
Twilight, shoved the rest of the books into the shelves with her magic, not caring to keep them in order, as she stormed back to the attic. Rummaging in her closet, the world felt bitterly cold, as she pulled a jacket over her body. Hanging a velvet scarf around her neck for extra warmth. Despite the burning sunshine outside, Twilight couldn’t shake the chilling numbness she felt. 
Twilight’s mind had already been made, and she cantered to the library’s entrance. Her mind focusing on the task on her mind, and right now, it was to be anywhere but cooped up inside. 
Twilight glanced one last time longingly at the shelves of books, hoping she could have found comfort among them, but knowing her efforts would be fruitless. With that, she turned the sign to ‘closed,’ and shut the door. Venturing off in search of something to do in the small town of Ponyville. 
> Chapter 2: Forsaken
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


Forsaken





Twilight found herself staring at a meaningless sunflower for far too long. Her mind muddled with fleeting thoughts. Everything was meaningless now, yet her mind sought an organized purpose. An anchor for her absent conscious to grasp, and drag herself back to reality. Yet Twilight couldn't find such a prospect. She stood shell-shocked as time passed, ignoring her in it's onward march. Forsaken by the vision she had once held dear. 
For all her life chasing her studies, the constant rush of things to accomplish. Now she had to deal with the time she had lost. With nothing to show for the years spent in a dream, now forced to the realization that her life was a neglected nightmare.
Now everything she, Twilight Sparkle, had ever aspired for was meaningless. The awakening from her dream had come in a haunting flare from the beautiful sun shining through the cracks of unfulfilled emptiness. Casting the light of truth on the dreamy darkness of deceit. Lies she had pursued for so long, believing she could be the difference in the world. A catalyst of good to bring forth the forbidden beauty, she had witnessed. And now the chain reaction could not be undone. Twilight's paradigm forever shifted beyond repair. For she had seen the truth, for a splitting moment that fractured the firmaments forever. And now all that remained was a numbing misery. Meaningless. Forsakenness.
I don't care anymore.
The thought was a whisper, a desperate plea to help lighten the world's weight, as it rested on her shoulders. It was unlike her, she had to care. Because it… her studies HAD to matter. She needed to stay vigilant to working on her assignments. 
You're never going to get another assignment, you already failed. 
The demons laughed, as Twilight mentally grasped for straws, or whatever she could to try and keep the small ember of hope from dying. With it's death it would shatter her, trapped forever in a frigid endless escape from which she feared she would be lost forever. Forsaken in an endless death of... Soul? Passion?... 
It didn't matter.
Hesitantly Twilight let her mind explore the possibility of moving on, forgetting her studies and allowing herself to be forgotten as well. The possibility of ignoring the burden of failure, for blissful naivety. And allow nothing to matter anymore.
But it did matter, because of her Celestia had been forced to…

Celestia had been forced to use the elements against the Nightmare, that had now seeped into her own life. Haunting her with it's unfailing reminder of her eternal sin.
Celestia had petrified her own sister in stone to save Equestria; because she, Twilight Sparkle, had been a fool. 
It was all Her fault. She was the one to blame.
“I'm sorry…” Twilight uttered, barely speaking as tears threatened to burst. Almost spewing forth in jumbled streams of sobs and fitful breaths, but Twilight managed to keep her anguish held within. Staring more intently at that Celestia damned sunflower. 
Twilight suddenly didn't want to be outside the library anymore. She didn't want to be around anypony. She felt surrounded by cheerful ponies all around, but alone in her wallowing sadness. 
Twilight adjusted her sweater and scarf in the sun's blistering heat, and turned abruptly from the hideous flower. As she made her way back towards the solitude of the library’s solitary confinement. 





The long walk back was exhausting, menial and strenuous. As Twilight avoided the gaze of the townsfolk, as she trod through the miserably sunny streets of Ponyville. She could feel the rumors growing like a cancerous tumor, as she marched in defeat to the steps of the old town's library. She threw the door carelessly closed behind her, as she returned to find the library vacant as when she’d left it. The air filled with a frigid silence that echoed through the shelves. Twilight tried to avoid disturbing the stillness, as she tread lightly to her room. All her energy once more deserting her like the perfidy befitting her shortcomings. 
Twilight didn’t bother taking off her sweater, instead opting to collapse onto the bed, and lay there for a long while. Letting her mind rest empty, as she drifted through the passing time’s dreamless state. 
Her ears perked at the sound of the front door opening. Followed by faint two legged footfalls of a particularly familiar purple scaled dragon. His voice catching the echo a moment later, as he called out to her. 

“H-hey, Twilight?...” He sounded concerned, and it made Twilight’s skin crawl. 

She was being weak. 

“What is it Spike?” She answered, not bothering to roll over to face him. 

There was a moment of hesitation, a question left unspoken. As Spike thought better on disturbing her. Eventually mumbling something to himself, as he left the room. Twilight didn’t care. 
She listened to him walk away, only because there was nothing else that interested her. The sensation of boredom crept into her aching muscles. Perching it’s heavy weight upon her shoulders, as she sighed with the burden. It’s hunger insatiable, as she lay hungry for something to occupy the time that marched on without her. 
Twilight’s stomach churned and she glanced at the clock, noting it was barely noon. She decided to snail her way out of bed, to look for something to fill the empty hunger inside her. 
She strode timelessly down the stairs, taking every moment possible as she wasn’t in any hurry to check off lunch today. She didn’t even care for keeping track of a checklist at present. She reached the lower floor, and walked past Spike who had busied himself finishing what she hadn’t. Methodically reorganizing book after forsaken book. 

Another reminder of how useless she truly was.

She entered the kitchen, and rummaged through the fridge. Staring at the box of cupcakes, considering how much of a healthy lunch they would actually be. Against better judgement, she levitated the box to the small table, as she also took out an old daisy sandwich, along with several apples. 
The hunger forcing her to take a larger portion of food from the fridge than she normally would have. Not all her hunger came from her disregard of breakfast. Yet it felt good to be eating. To be doing something. To have some form of company, besides her boredom. Even if gluttony wasn’t the most delightful of guests. 
Do you really deserve to eat so much?
Her inner demons mocked, as Twilight bit into the juicy apple. It's crisp sweetness a bitter reward for her mind. As she hesitated to take another bite of the apple. How could she be allowed a small bit of joy, when she was a living abomination? A failure, unworthy of such trivial things. 
You're a pig, sitting here eating when you don't even deserve to live. 
The sudden harsh thought made Twilight pause. She needed food, and it seemed to make her feel better about her current situation. But the pit growing inside her with every bite was a poison to her detriment. The sadness was growing, just as much as the joy she was trying to reclaim. The pain made it clear it would be larger than any relief she could hope to find. 
Fine, go ahead and eat. Eat until you die. 
The voice chided, as Twilight reluctantly devoured the rest of her lunch, and felt her famished belly swell. The cupcakes, with their sultry icing, were the perfect garnish to such a horrid meal of greed. 
Finished, Twilight left the table, and began the long trek back to her bedroom. Her hunger now replaced by a nauseating satisfaction that beckoned her to sleep. A request of which, she had no reluctance in complying with. However, Spike interrupted her ideas of such relief. 

“Twilight?” 

“What? Spike!” Twilight whirled on him glaring maliciously. Putting extra care to line her words with sharp anger that cut like razors. 

“You have a letter…” Spike said, hesitantly. Flinching in anticipation of pain, before continuing. 
“From; Princess Celestia.”

It took some time for Twilight to realize what Spike had said. Her grumbling demeanor melting with fear. Like inky dark tendrils in the back of her mind, enveloping her thoughts and chilling her to the bone thoroughly. 

“What does it say?” Twilight inquired halfheartedly, and she saw a bit of curious surprise in Spike's gaze. As he sheepishly opened his gaze. Clearly he had expected a more aggressive outburst, but Twilight was fighting the urge to upend her stomach's contents onto the wooden floor. Her mind swimming with sickness at what the piece of neatly rolled parchment may contain. 

“I don't know. I haven’t opened it yet…”

“Why not? Where is it?” She asked in a skittish anxiousness. Shivering with anticipation and dread.  

“Here,” Spike answered, producing the letter in his purple claws, and Twilight enveloped it in her telekinesis. Nervously continuing to her room. Now in an energetic anxiety of her great fear coming to fruition. Twilight closed the door to her room behind her, as she began to pace. The rhythmic stride of her hoof clops across the grainy wood the only sound to the companionship of Twilight’s inner demons.















Twilight sat on her bed. Looking around the room, eyes lingering on anything, except the letter. She couldn’t open it. For all the time she had spent in the day, she could not bring herself to open the letter. She trembled with fear of what it might hold. The very prospect of receiving a repudiation letter, from Princess Celestia herself, was too much to bear. 
It would douse the weak flame of her last hope, and bring the fragile fragments of her life crashing to the ground. A final nail in the coffin Twilight had made for herself. She could feel the void opening before her, and all she needed was a push. 
She could feel the noose tightening with every passing moment. The urgency to reply to her princess, to be devout. To be faithful once more. Conflicting with the repulse of being rejected by the goddess she worshiped. Twilight couldn’t open the Letter. 

She WOULDN’T open the letter. 

Twilight affixed her determination in such, that if the Princess was going to banish her. Then She would have to look into Twilight’s steeled gaze. And see… 

What would Celestia see in her vision?... 

A forsaken plea for mercy? 
A betrayal of Twilight’s weakness? 
An immovable hatred? 
Steadfast stubbornness? 
Defiance? 
A cry for repentance? 
Guilty acceptance?...

It didn’t matter, all Twilight desired was a last glimpse of enlightening truth to her darkening reality. She wanted to see Princess Celestia face to face, one last time. Before her nightmare would consume her. Was it so hard to ask? 
For a last visitation of the Sun’s deliverance, before being damned to an endless fate of misery, befitting her treachery. 

But what did Twilight want to see in Celestia’s eyes? 

An eternal sadness? 
The pain of losing another forsaken soul? 
Bitter resentment to ignite the flames of detestation? 
A righteous vengeance? 
Retribution? 
A tear shed, like the one before princess Celestia had been forced to banish Luna to a timeless prison of petrified stone?… 

Twilight felt her rock exterior crumbling away at the thought. The darkness would soon feast upon her sanity soon enough. Except it would leave Twilight a wandering husk, ever searching for the Dawn’s glorious burning flame. 
Twilight discarded the unopened letter in a wastebasket. Knowing full well, that Celestia would not be pleased. But she’d just have to slather that punishment atop the rest when the Princess delivered Twilight’s conviction in pony. 
Having finally decided on disposing of the forsaken letter. A last act of defiant freedom Twilight had claimed for herself, against the rapidly deteriorating influence of her own free will. Twilight collapsed exhausted, onto her bed. Enveloping herself in her own warmth as she decided to take a nap. Not sleeping the entire night after Nightmare Moon’s defeat, aided Twilight as she surrendered to her weakness. Allowing the world to fade into its forsaken meaningless facade, and allowing her mind the solace it so desperately craved.

And dreamed of a better world in which she, Twilight Sparkle, didn't belong.
> Chapter 3: Negligence
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


Negligence


Twilight awoke, unrested from her sleep. Tired as the day was long, and despite being asleep for well past morning. Twilight rubbed her eyes with her hooves, and moaned a dismal complaint into the lifeless air around her. Glancing negligently at her disheveled mane in the mirror, before venturing downstairs in search of some leftover pancakes to eat. Spike normally prepared a large morning breakfast, far greater than a dragon of his size could ever hope to eat alone. However, as she neared the library’s lobby, she noticed the disturbed silence was instead filled with the sounds of scrambling feet, and unwelcome chatter. 
She quickened her pace to the bottom of the stairs, to find Spike hurriedly looking through books. While a familiar fashionable unicorn, she’d met a few days prior, levitated several books in the air. Clearly looking for something in particular. 
“I could’ve sworn this old library had something on Equinaissance era fashion…” The white unicorn with a well kept purple mane, mumbled. Loudly talking to herself in the empty hollow hush of the library. She turned, and caught sight of Twilight as she was slipping down the stairs, headed towards the kitchen. 

“Oh, oh my… Dear heavens...” The pale unicorn gasped in shock. Raising a hoof to her lips in dismay.

“What?” Twilight asked with a sideways glance, trying to sounds as annoyed and irritated as she felt. 

“Only a few days spent in Ponyville, and you’re already succumbing to laziness, Darling?” Rarity inspected critically, disapproving of Twilight’s unkempt mane. 

“I know you’re not in Canterlot anymore, but you should at least strive to stay vigilant in being presentable...” Rarity blathered on and on, as Twilight rolled her eyes. She frankly didn’t want a lesson from the uptight fashionista about the proper ways of mane therapy. However, Rarity had other plans on sharing her own two cents on the matter. Continuing to chatter on, following after Twilight as she continued towards the kitchen. 

“Why you even have glitter in your mane.” Rarity almost screamed in horror. 

“Definitely Pinkie Pie’s doing no doubt,” She mumbled her complaints, as she inspected the disastrous display before her. Taking it upon herself to liberate Twilight’s mane of the glimmering specks using her azure magic. 

“I would say something about your somewhat lackadaisical get up, but your mane is just horrid, Darling!” Rarity seemed fit to burst, as her compulsive neatness only seemed to uncover more and more of the devilish debris. 
Twilight could feel her resilience fading. Her small amount of tolerance disintegrating as Rarity continued to bother her. She considered levitating a book to slap the marshmallow unicorn across the face, but refrained from such a childish thing. However, it did give her a slight smile of satisfaction to ponder over as she entered the kitchen.
Twilight found no leftover pancakes, the kitchen was mostly untouched, as if Spike had become distracted before ever getting to make his usually pancakes. Twilight breathed out heavily in irritation, the ivory unicorn continued her soliloquy, as Twilight set about fixing herself breakfast. 

“... And by no means should you ever use a broken comb t-” 

“How fascinating!” Twilight cut Rarity short, her temper boiling on high, as she set a kettle for tea. 

“Perhaps, if I’d known I wasn’t going to be alone today, I would have taken the few minutes to brush my mane!” Twilight burst with bristling irritation. 

“But as you can clearly see,” Twilight gestured about the tiled room. “I haven’t even been up long enough to eat breakfast!” 

Rarity looked taken aback by the sudden outburst, raising a hoof once more to her mouth in utter shock. As Twilight seethed.  “I-I-I… I apologize for jumping to conclusions, but I seem to have overstayed my welcome.” 

Rarity stammered, looking about nervously, as if just being enlightened to the concept of time. She began to back out of the room, “Pardon the intrusion, but I guess I’ll have to -ahem- come back later for that book on Equinaissance fashion…” 

Rarity smiled politely, before turning abruptly, and galloped out of the library. The door slammed, echoing in the now peaceful silence. 

“Good riddance.” Twilight muttered under her breath. Letting a sigh of relief wash over her as it bounced off the tile floors to meet her own ears. 

“What was that about?” Spike asked walking in holding a copy of ‘A Classical Colt’ in his claws. 

“She just remembered she left the oven on, or something.” Twilight smiled bitterly. 

“What do you have there anyway, ‘A Classical Colt?’” Twilight inquired quizzically. 

“Oh this? I know it’s not quite a book on old pony fashion, but it had some illustrations that I thought might have helped spark Rarity’s inspiration.” He said, a distant glazed look crossing his eyes, as he said her name. 
Twilight rolled her eyes in disgust, it was obvious Spike had fallen in love at first sight. She didn’t need to snoop through his journal for that secret. It was written on his face. It was obvious from the stupor she caused the young purple dragon, every time she was mentioned. To the way he spoke of the high class unicorn, that he evidently had feelings for Rarity. 
The mere thought made Twilight want to puke and gag, and be ever so dramatic. But she kept it in the back of her mind, locked neatly inside the box of emotions she’d started suppressing. Spike looked as if he had more to say, but apparently decided better. Retreating back to the shelves, to sort the mornings rambunctious chaos. 
Twilight waited, tapping a hoof to the ticking of the clock. Waiting for the water to boil, as her temper simmered. 
Twilight decided to look through the fridge as she waited for the kettle. When the search came up empty, she chanced a glance inside the now empty cupcake box she’d left on the table. However, it became apparent from the lack of food, that Twilight would have to run some errands today. Twilight knew she could probably find some unused haycake mix in the cupboard, but she didn’t feel like going through the trouble of cooking measly haycakes.  With a heavy sigh of reluctance, Twilight turned back to the steaming kettle. 
“I wasn’t hungry anyway.” She murmured to herself, a mantra to help sedate the hunger. 
To numb the agitation of depriving herself sustenance. It worked well enough, but Twilight didn’t care. Twilight opened the cupboard, and fetched the box of teabags from the top shelf. It felt noticeably lighter, the reason of which becoming transparent, as she dumped the contents onto the counter. The small sprinkling particles of collected dust and seeds the only pathetic reward to Twilight’s unbelief. Apparently she hadn’t brought as much food to Ponyville as she thought. Granted she’d thought at the time of packing that she wouldn’t be here for more than a couple of days. But now her shortsightedness had come back to bite her in the flank. 
The sinking feeling in her stomach was sickeningly bitter to Twilight, as she wanted nothing more than to ignore a reason to venture back into the streets of Ponyville. The town was nice, and the ponies friendly as tightly knit neighbors could be. Yet alienating to an outsider like herself. She didn’t want to face it, but she knew she couldn’t nobble with the truth. She didn’t belong here. 
Twilight sought a ploy that would allow her to avoid responsibility, but she knew better than to offload the task to Spike. He liked to avoid vegetables like the plague, thus Twilight was forced to fulfill the need for shopping, if she wanted any form of organized balance to the selection of healthy produce. 
It didn’t make her any less pleased at the prospect of facing the outside world.

“Spike!” Twilight called into the library, waiting for the small dragon to answer. 

“What?” 

“I’m gonna need a list of food, and anything else we need.” She said, as she strolled from the kitchen. She headed toward her bedroom, if nothing else she was going to do the bare minimum to keep up an organized appearance. Spike fetched a roll of parchment and began scribbling things into a neat order, as she vanished into the stairway. 
Twilight didn’t feel like doing a whole lot, but she at least combed through her mane once. Before patting the wrinkles the best she could from her jacket. She decided to leave the scarf behind today, since the sun was still shining in from the window. Giving it’s ghastly glow of warmth to the library’s chilled shadows. She reminded herself on how hot it had been yesterday, and found comfort in wearing only the jacket against the numbness she had started to enjoy.
Twilight stared at the reflection in the mirror, taking in the facade of straight hair, and vibrant purple hued fur. A perfect image to hide the dereliction lying behind the smiling mask she now plastered across her face. 

All would be fine. 

All WAS fine. 

She had nothing to fear, she could play the part of being happy. 

If only for the little bit that she required, to appear unbroken among the oblivious ponies around her. She lied to herself, as she prayed that nopony would look farther than her blissful deception. A fake smile, to reassure others that she was fine. 

She was not fine. 

Twilight turned from the mirror, and noticed Spike standing silently in the doorway. They exchanged a long silence between their gaze, before he cleared his throat. 

“I made a list of everything we need, so you ready to go now? Or…” 

“Thank you very much Spike.” Twilight smiled, grasping the list in her magic. “But I’ll just be out for a few minutes, and back before you can say-”

Spike didn’t let go of the paper. 

“Spike?” Twilight protested, “What are you?”

“I’m coming too, You’re gonna want some help carrying all of the groceries.” 

He was clearly lying, and Twilight wanted to fight his bluff. She offered what she hoped was a sincere smile, but Spike’s claw merely tightened around the list. 

“I’m coming with you, and that’s final.” He said, and turned to walk back down the stairs in triumph. 
Twilight rolled her eyes, allowing herself a slight smirk. Letting her magic fade from the parchment, before following Spike  submissively down the stairs. Arguing was just going to be exhausting, and she told herself she would appreciate his help. Even though she knew, she didn’t need it. 










The market was about as busy as Twilight would've expected for a small town on a Wednesday afternoon. Not too busy, yet not completely abandoned, to her delight. Spike followed close behind her, listing off a few things, as Twilight quickly scanned the rows of stands for what was on the list. Mentally mapping a route that led her body through the marketplace. Following the most 'efficient' route she could conceive, as she'd stop at a stand only long enough to offer a polite smile. A few sparse words of courtesy, before buying the few things she needed. Moving quickly along to the next stand as she had marked out in her mind. 

Or was it actually the most efficient route? 
Was her mind just a useless broken machine that no longer functioned properly? 

Her doubts tossed her mind about with uncertainty. 

No, just because she'd failed, didn't mean her mind's other capabilities were useless. 

At least, that's what her mind was debating, as Twilight stumbled into somepony else with enough force to knock them to the ground.  With a small cry of dismay escaping the pony's lips, as Twilight snapped out of autopilot. Her gaze lowering to find a pale yellow pegasus cowering inside her long pink mane. A trio of butterflies adorned her shivering flank, as Twilight recognized the pegasi. 

"I'm sorry..." Fluttershy whimpered slightly. Withdrawing further into herself, as Twilight's brain caught up to reality. 

"No, no, I'm the one who should be sorry," Twilight glanced around nervously, offering a hoof to help the poor pegasus stand. 

"I wasn't watching were I was going, and..." Twilight started to apologize, but Fluttershy had noticed Spike. Again. 

"Ooh oh, you're the unicorn with the baby dragon." Fluttershy spoke with excitement as she stood once more. Her wings fidgeting with ecstatic anticipation. 

"I thought you might have already left after the 'Summer Sun Celebration,'" Her voice continued softly, "But I'm glad I get to talk to you again." 

Twilight rolled her eyes. It seemed this was going to take a while. She took a deep breath, calmed her nerves, before an idea struck her. "Hey Spike, how about I finish our shopping while you talk with Fluttershy. We only have a few things left, and-" 

"Twilight..." He began to protest. His arms already full of things to carry. 

"I d-don't want to get in your way, if you have things to do." Fluttershy visibly melted, as her gaze fell to the ground. Her hoof began to dig timidly at the dirt, as Twilight continued. 

"Oh, no, you wouldn't be getting in the way. I'll be done before you even know it." 

"Twilight. I came to help you carry things back, so that's what I'll do." Spike said firmly, and Twilight sighed in annoyance. As Spike turned to Fluttershy. 

"I'm sorry, maybe we can catch up later, but right now I'm helping Twilight carry..." He fumbled a few apples, that Twilight caught in her telekinesis. 

"Thanks Spike, but maybe you and Fluttershy could go sit over there." Twilight said, gesturing to a table next to a cafe. "You've already been a big help carrying everything for so long you must be getting tired. A break would do some good before we walk back to the library." Twilight smiled, just hoping they'd take the bait and leave her alone for a few minutes. She could see the eagerness in Fluttershy's quiet gaze, at the suggestion. Spike visibly contemplated the offer, before asking one last time. 

"Are you sure, Twilight?" 

"I'm sure. We only need some pancake mix, and carrots. I'll be with you shortly." She promised, lightly tugging at the paper list held securely in the dragon's claw. She felt his grip loosen ever so slightly, and she freely seized the parchment. 

"Oh, I need a bundle of carrots too." Fluttershy chimed in, before shying away from confrontation once again. Her eyes glancing all about, nervous and unfocused as the pegasi they belonged to. 

"I'm sure Twilight wouldn't mind using your bits to buy a bundle of carrots for you." Spike offered generously, and Twilight glared at him for a few seconds. Before smiling reassuringly at Fluttershy as she met her gaze. 

"I-I wouldn't want to be a burden to anypony." Fluttershy hesitated. 

"Don't worry, I might as well save you the walking as well." Twilight's sarcasm evaporated into a sigh, as the pegasus dug through her saddlebag for the few bits. Once the bits were bestowed, Twilight gave the two one last reassuring smile, before waltzing off towards the last few stands. 

Oh look at you, all miss goody-too-shoes, an errand pony because she can't do anything else right. 

Twilight's inner monologue laughed, mocking her with every step. Twilight's smile slowly dissolving to gritted teeth, as she fought back the bitterness in her mind. She could almost swear she heard laughter echoing around her, or perhaps it was just in her mind. Yet she began to sweat, did anypony know? Were they silently judging her? Was she walking normal? 

Oh don't worry, walking normal should be the least of YOUR concerns. 

The nagging voice chided. And the daylight seemed to dim in around her. Darkening the vibrantly cheerful world outside Twilight's mind. The laughter growing in its agonizing cacophony as Twilight could feel ponies beginning to stop and stare. Her breaths now coming in rapid, hysteria. As she felt her body twitch under the surmounting pressure of silent judgement. The confining conformity to fit in constricting around her like a rope. The air felt thick as water, threatening to drown her if she couldn't get enough. All the while the laughter mocked her, as it rang out. Twilight's hooves stumbled, as her legs began to shake. Nothing was alright. 

Everything was wrong. 

Twilight was NOT fine. 

She was sure anypony could see it now. From her jittery movements, robotic and unnatural, to the shadows wrapping themselves around her sanity. As she tried to approach the carrot stand. Twilight's mind was racing, pleading for an escape, screaming. The voices wouldn't stop, the doubts piling heavily upon her, as she struggled to compose herself. Trying desperately to keep herself together, trying unsuccessfully to not shatter and crumble in front of the ponies staring through her. They were surely all staring, laughing at her and how weak she was. Taunting her for all her failures. She didn't know how they knew, but they surely did. Perhaps it was beyond logical reasoning to assume such, but Twilight had abandoned logic the moment she had failed to see her negligence. 
The air was deeply polluted at this point, the laughter deafening, as she felt herself collapsing under the suffocation. She put her forehooves over her ears to drown them out, but she couldn't block out her inner torment. Shamefully, tears began to prick her eyes, and she closed them tightly.
> Chapter 4: Over the Brink
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


Over the Brink


Twilight sat, crumbling as she muttered incoherence into the crowd starting to gather. Ponies whispered concerns to one another, as Spike pushed his way through the sea of bodies. Fighting his way to the front, before finding Twilight broken and ashamed. Lying in a growing puddle of tears as she stared off into the distance. Forgotten bits lay were they had clattered to the ground. He gently placed a caring claw on her shoulder. 

“Twilight? Hey, Twilight, are you okay? It’s just in you mind.” He spoke with certainty as concern wrote itself in his expression. Trying to shake her from her trance, but the words wouldn't reach her, instead falling on deaf ears. Twilight’s gaze barely shifted from where she stared. Seeing beyond reason, as she was lost in her own thoughts. 

Oh, what a scene you’ve made, how embarrassing. 

The voices wouldn’t stop teasing, as Twilight felt her words vanishing from her voice. As she desperately tried to reach for something, anything to make it stop. 
The ledge below her had vanished, and she had fallen headlong into the depths of despair. Her mind was under attack from all sides, by the laughter that had grown into a single sickening chord plucked by the tendrils of fate. Ringing out it’s damning sound, as Twilight sought to save herself. 

But she was too far gone. 

The ground began to shake, and the crowd began to become afraid. Looking in all directions for the source. Someone shouted above the growing chaos.

“Stampede!” 

Immediate panic followed, as chaos ensued. Ponies scattered, leaving Twilight huddled where she lay. As Spike looked nervously about looking for safety. The world was in total commotion, as Twilight starred. Colors dancing before her vision, as she saw without seeing. The disconnect of reality had seized her, as she felt frozen. The laughter continued regardless of the rapidly dwindling bustle of the street. 

You have to do something! Protect Spike, can’t you do that at least?! 

She heard her mind scream. Her heart began to beat, the ground beneath her hooves was trembling, as she rose from her stupor. The exuberance of life once more filling her body, as she answered the call of protector. Determination fixed in her concentration, as her mind grasped for a spell. Anything that could aid her, as her thoughts began to linger on the thunderous ground splitting asunder beneath them. A cloud of dust was beginning to form just at the outskirts of the small town, the road was straight, and Twilight could see. In that simple moment of clarity, as she took command of her life momentarily. 

“Spike! Get behind me!” Twilight commanded, and the frightened dragon obeyed.

She took a deep breath, counting to ten, as she began focusing on the danger at hoof. Her horn gathering magic, as it became alight with mighty power. She thought of a spell, a simple bubble of protection, but it was good enough for her. Twilight cast the simple magic, a shield enveloping her and Spike as the first cow appeared on the horizon. 

"Yeehaw! Get 'em Winona!"

A hearty cry rang out across the hills through the streets of Ponyville, as a sole pony burst from the cloudy haze. Galloping full speed alongside, as she quickly outpaced the fleeing cattle. Followed quickly by a barking dog, running feverishly about trying to herd the chaotic herd. The shade from the earth pony's worn hate, incapable of hiding the determination in the emerald gaze, that shined in the evening solar brilliance. As Twilight watched on in awe. 
A lasso whirled ferociously through the air, whistling like a tornado. Before it was cast, it's aim unfailing as it caught hold of the leading bovine's horn. The golden brown earth pony dug her hooves firmly into the ground, gripping the taught rope in her teeth. With a heavy tug the leader fell to the earth, causing several cows following close behind to stumble. The stampede collapsed into a disordered mess, as it slowly fizzled and died. Leaving an excited Winona running about the felled stampede. 
The earth grew still, as the dust settled around the piled up cows. Twilight watched speechless as the earth pony helped the cows right themselves. Exchanging a few words with the bovines, before letting them wander off to tend their mild injuries. Ponies began to peak from windows, a few braver residents stepping cautiously out of their front doors, to see what had happened. A few started to cheer, as their heroine offered a simple nod in acknowledgment, before turning back to tending her farmlands. 

"Isn't Applejack amazing?!" 

Twilight overheard a pony speaking in equivalent awe, and she recalled meeting the farm pony during her errands on the first day in Ponyville. She could still feel the sickening taste at the overabundance of apples she'd eaten. The recent memory made her slightly regret buying more apples, but for now she was glad that the town had withdrawn so rapidly. Seemingly forgetting about her disgraceful weakness. The streets slow to be refilled with the bustling cheer of other ponies. Twilight took the opportunity to vanish into the shadows, pulling the jacket's hood over her. Casting her embarrassment in the shadows of lonesome comfort. She had already made a fool of herself, and wanted nothing more than to retreat to the library so she could hide away from socializing. Hoping the townsfolk would forget her entirely, and the pathetic disruption she had been. 
Twilight walked at a slow pace, wandering aimlessly, as she heard the townsfolk chatting enthusiastically of their farm pony heroine. It relieved her slightly to hear them talk of somepony other than her. Fluttershy had seemingly vanished in the panic, and remembering the shy pegasi made Twilight pause. Looking back at the way she'd come, as her mind retraced her steps. She had completely forgotten about the timid pegasus, let alone buying her carrots. Had she just left the bits lying in the street? 

How careless. . .

Oh well, they were probably gone by now anyway. Picked up by some foal who would spend the money on sweets, or something.

Twilight considered going back for Spike. The dragon was no doubt carrying their things back to the library, and she considered helping him. However; the possibility of ponies recognizing her, as the mentally unstable unicorn they'd seen collapse in a rambling mess, made her disregard such a ridiculous notion entirely. Twilight set off walking once more, trying not to be lost entirely to the thoughts brewing in her mind. A nice pot of emotions stewing in her mental cauldron, demanding her attention lest they spill forth for the world to see. How broken a pony she had come to be. 
Twilight didn't reach the library, she could feel curious eyes starring. She stepped into a few side streets, seeking solace. Twilight glared miserably at the ground, as she passed a few barrels. She could feel tears forming, like rain on a funeral parade. Twilight paused, feeling the cold of the shadows around her, as the alleyway felt like it was closing in. She could feel something drawing closer. The pit in her stomach growing, as she felt dizzying hunger grip her. 
Twilight jumped at the sound of confetti bursting from a barrel behind her. A pink sponge of joy bouncing from the wooden enclosure, before landing on all four hooves. Pinkie seemed to regain some sense of direction, as Twilight just stared. Mouth agape in bewilderment. Pinkie's eyes exploded with colorful happiness, as her smile broadened impossibly big. She hopped a few more feet, before standing at Twilight's side. 

"Finally found you!" She said cheerfully, and Twilight offered a wavering halfhearted smile in reply. 

"I had a feeling you'd be hiding somewhere. I also," She paused momentarily, almost as if on cue Twilight's stomach growled. 

"Knew you'd be hungry. Lucky for you, I always have a spare..." Pinkie glanced cautiously in both directions, even upwards towards the rooftops, before leaning in and whispering the last word breathlessly in Twilight's ear. "...Muffin!" 

Twilight thought Pinkie's serious demeanor rather odd for the pink party pony, but the moment passed in a blink. As Pinkie reached into the hairs of her wild mane, before pulling out a neat hoof sized box. Offering it to Twilight with another jubilant smile. Twilight raised an eyebrow questioningly, but Pinkie merely waited for Twilight to pick it up in her magic. Before springing back the way she'd come. 

"Well, gotta fly! Just watch out for Derpy!" Pinkie called, before jumping high into the air, and falling back into the wooden barrel without another sound. Twilight wasn't sure what to make of the strange encounter. She walked skeptically to the barrel, half expecting to find Pinkie lying in the bottom waiting for her to walk away, but when she glanced inside she was met with a blast of confetti to the face for her efforts. Pinkie was nowhere to be found, and she lifted the barrel with her magic in disbelief, revealing solid ground underneath. Twilight frantically paced about the barrel, wondering what had just happened. It was beyond logic, and Twilight wanted an answer to the mystery that was Pinkie Pie. Yet, she found no answer to her curiosity.

"It just doesn't make any sense!" Twilight hissed in protest. There had to be a trick, a misdirection of some kind. But Twilight couldn't figure it out, as she wracked her brain seeking a logical explanation. 

"There HAS to be an explanation!" Twilight ranted, "Ponies don't just vanish into thin air, let alone earth ponies!" 

Twilight needed the answer, and yet she knew she would not receive one. Not from the strange pink pony herself. Twilight made a mental note to track down and figure Pinkie's secret out, just not today. With the resolution of procrastination, Twilight let out a satisfied sigh of resolve. Her stomach growled again, reminding Twilight of the box she had carelessly left on the ground a few paces away. She levitated it to her, and proceeded to walk on. Finding herself drawn to a bench in a fairly empty boulevard near the outskirts of town. It felt peaceful, yet unusually empty for the quaint friendly town of Ponyville. For a small populace, Ponyville often felt much busier and alive with the bustling of cheerful ponies going about their lives. 
Twilight decided to not overthink it, and instead thank the heavens for her much desired solace. Twilight sat basking in the harsh sunlight, as she opened the box and found a blueberry muffin inside. Twilight smiled at the idea of an alternate outcome, of yet more confetti and glitter as a jesting surprise. Though, at the present, Twilight was thankful that the box did indeed contain a muffin to ease her hurting hunger. 
Twilight decided to pick at the muffin with her magic, rather than bite wholeheartedly into it. She sat letting the time tick by, her eyes cast to the simple box with a single muffin. As she nibbled at the pieces she tore from it. Trying her best to ignore the world around her, in the hopes that any pony passing would do the same. Life had begun to feel like an old record that had played too long, and simply kept skipping at the end of its track. Playing the same few notes, before jarringly jumping backwards through time to play them again. On an endless loop, of meaningless annoyance to all who heard it. Yet, in Twilight's delusion she sought to keep giving meaning to that inevitable repetition. 

Look at you, grasping for desperation. Admit it, you have nothing left to lose in your pathetic life. Your life ambitions of lifelong education and learning, it has been wiped away in one fell swoop. All because of you and your stupidity, and failure to see what you really needed... 

Friends? Twilight thought, perhaps she shouldn't have discarded such a small request from her princess. She should have followed her instructions more closely. Instead of disregarding Celestia's plan, thinking foolishly that it wasn't as important as her own. 

What good would 'Friends' do you now? You'd be better off dead. There's no fixing the mistake that you are!

But what about Spike? Twilight immediately shot back at the darkness embracing her mind. Ever dripping like toxic waste polluting a pond of once clear water. Hoping to have caught the problem where it had started. 

You really think Celestia will let you keep him? She'll come to take him to a pony better suited to care for him when she comes knocking on your door. No amount of walls or facades can hide the truth, you're merely living on borrowed time. What a selfish pony you truly are. Just end your suffering like the weak pathetic foal you really are. 

Twilight wanted nothing more than to not believe herself, but the harder she struggled, the clearer things became in her muddled mind. The truth cut deeply like razors, chilling Twilight as she sat, lost in a defining moment of decisiveness. But unable to find the strength to protect her hopeful delusions. 
Twilight's ears perked, following the sound of something dragging along the ground. She lifted her eyes, to be met with quite the spectacle. A tired Applejack slowly dragging a trophy down the road. Headed for the farmlands from the center of the town. Twilight noticed the baskets of apples still on the weary farm pony's back. Even when being presented with a town's appreciation, she never seemed to stop working. Twilight inwardly admired that character of the hard working stubborn pony. But she quickly looked back down, hiding her face as ponies started to filter from the gathering Twilight hadn't even noticed. Perhaps Spike had attended, she made a mental note to ask him about it later. 
As Twilight had begun to wander away from the bench, she noticed that Applejack had stopped dragging the trophy, and instead hoisted it on her back along with the baskets of apples. A small determination shone from her eyes, despite the bags weighing them down. Detrimentally determined to put on a facade of strength as the street filled once more with friendly faces. Twilight took the opportunity to make herself scarce, heading back in the direction of the Library's overhanging branches of its hollow treetop exterior. 

She entered the library, admitting the action felt repetitive by this point, another thing to add to the list of mundaneity. Twilight walked through the empty halls. Looking, but not finding what she sought. What she was searching for? She didn't know, the silence felt haunting as she found herself staring up the stairs to her temporary bedroom. Her mind was quiet. The demons left unspoken, as she stared through the graying light. The moment was perfect. 
Tears brimmed Twilight's eyes, as she found herself holding her breath. Waiting, despite the opportunity of solace presented in a singular thought. The moment seemed tragic, yet fitting. Perhaps it was time. 
Her hoof was shaking, as she mounted the first step. Twilight felt alive, the blood rushing through her ears. An unseen rhythm pounding the drums as she stepped higher. The abyss of nothingness watching greedily, as Twilight walked on in her daze. Her mind clear of the haze, focused on a single escape. Perhaps today was the day. 
Like the noose tightening around the last breath. Blood running across the floor, the scarlet halo against a wall from a destroyed mind. The danger of the threatening imaginations of one's thoughts, was enlightening. 
Yet Twilight's mind was vacant of all these. She opened the door to her bedroom, the hinges squealing in protest, as she passed through to the other side. Shutting it tightly behind her, as she approached the mirror. She knew not why, until she met her own eyes. 
Twilight stared at the shattered pony before her, eyes empty as death itself. Its sickening smile too wide for any sane pony. A twitch in the other's eye mimicking her own, as Twilight fidgeted restlessly, lost in the moment as she stared into the eyes of her terror. 

'Why do you resist?' The tainted glass asked. 

"I... I can't..." Twilight responded, seeing beyond her sanity. 

'Weak... You always were the weakest link...' 

"I don't deserve that fate!" Twilight glared at her reflection, the mirror laughed its hysteria into the air. Twilight waited, staring before finishing. 

"Celestia deserves her justice..." Twilight glanced ashamedly at the floor. The laughing continued, this time it was her own. It bubbled and burst from her chest, as tears stained her cheeks. Falling to the floor without obstruction. 

'Suite yourself, when Celestia comes, you'll find some fates are worse than death. Coward!'  

Twilight reeled, raising a hoof to smash the mirror with all her strength. Pausing as she found Spike's reflection peering from the doorway. Worry plastered across his face, visibly on display for her to see. Twilight lowered her hoof, gritting her teeth as she turned to raise up her walls. Attempting to hide her tragedy under a facade of fake smiles and premeditated reassurance, but Spike was gone. Twilight stood, staring at the slit in the door. The darkness beyond seeping through like the abyss insider her desolate stone cold heart.  

'You'll see... Mark my words... You'll see... Coward...'
> Chapter 5: Nothing Left
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


Nothing Left


Twilight spent the next few days in a repeating process of sleep, eating, and mindlessly reading. Taking in information, but not retaining anything of substance. On one occasion, her reading had been disrupted abruptly by a sky blue pegasus she'd met previously. The annoying weather pony with the familiarly obnoxious multi colored mane, just as begrudgingly irritating as the pegasi it belonged to. Rainbow 'Danger' Dash had come crashing through her balcony window, and completely obliterated several shelves, along with the glass of the fragile pane. In a bombshell cacophony that had made quite a devastating disaster within the now chaotic disorder of books. As the glass rained down from above, Twilight had ducked for cover, and only emerged once the dust had started to settle. 
Surprisingly, Rainbow Dash, had not been visibly hurt, and had sprung up within seconds. Giving only a parting apology before flying from the shattered window, like a bat out of hell. Leaving Twilight and Spike to clean up after her. Twilight cursed that rainbow maned pegasus, as she worked in cleaning up the war zone that had once been orderly ranks of knowledge and wisdom. 
The next day Pinkie had stopped by to offer some muffins she and Applejack had made. Twilight had accepted them as genuinely as she could, but it was just a ruse in order to appease the energetic party planner. Twilight had used the excuse of needing to study more, while gesturing to a pile of books she hadn't finished organizing from the prior day's disaster. Pinkie had nodded with understanding, and bounced out the door, enthusiastic to share more muffins with the townsfolk. Twilight had gone back to brooding, as she continued to waste her time away. The muffins completely forgotten. 
The day after that, Twilight woke late in the evening to find a horde of bunnies decimating the town's flowerbeds. Twilight had taken that as an excuse to stay indoors, and ignore the outside world. A few ponies visited, looking for books, but Twilight ignored them as best she could. Which proved successful against most the ponies she barely knew. 
Which brought Twilight to today. She sat listening to the ramblings of Pinkie Pie, the clueless mare who couldn't catch a hint if it slapped her across the face. As Twilight sat staring at a book she was supposedly reading, yet the page may as well have been blank for all the words she didn't comprehend. Her mind too distracted by the noisy disposition berating her ears.

"And so, I'm throwing Gilda; the gryphon, a genuine Ponyville Welcoming Party!" Pinkie exclaimed, brandishing an invitation from nowhere, and plopping it onto the page Twilight was halfheartedly staring at in mock concentration. 

"Will you come?" Pinkie asked, offering a super sincere smile. Twilight's own polite grin paled in comparison. 

"No... I still have to do some studying..." Twilight lied through her teeth, as she hoped Pinkie would just leave her in peace. The pink party pony, however, lingered just a little longer. 

"You sure?" Pinkie asked, "It won't be till this afternoon. So maybe you could finish studying in time to attend." 

Twilight wanted anything but to agree to go to a silly party. She really didn't want to go outside, especially after her meltdown earlier in the week. She couldn't bring herself to face the ponies of Ponyville yet. Nor ever again. 

"I'll see what I can do..." Twilight promised without conviction. 

"Oki doki!" Pinkie smiled knowingly. Bouncing towards the door in jubilation. "I'll be sure to save some cake! You won't regret it!"
"Now, I'd better go plan that party, otherwise it'll have to be a surprise party. With the surprise being no party at all!" Pinkie called, as she vanished out into the streets, heading for Sugarcube Corner. 
Twilight watched for a minute, making sure Pinkie was gone, before letting out a long heavy sigh. She wouldn't attend that stupid party, how could she? Twilight turned from the door, pulling her hood over her ears. Hiding from the world, hiding from Spike as he worked a few shelves away. Checking the books to make sure their reorganization efforts, after Rainbow Dash's crash landing of literacy, hadn't misplaced any. She stared, trapped in her mind as she watched herself turn another numberless page in a book. And read meaningless words recorded in its lengths of literature. 
How long had it been since she felt control over her own actions? How long had she been lost in her own mind, a mere observer to the world outside. A world she had once lived in, and taken for granted. 

It's better this way. At least, you can no longer feel the pain of living. Such a disgrace you have become. What's it been, a good two weeks now? Celestia just can't be bothered to punish a fool like you... Yet. 

And when was the last time you heard from you family? They don't even care... They probably don't even want to see you after hearing of your failure...

Twilight's darkness remarked, pouring another drop of despair into her heart, as she no longer felt its numb embrace. She just wanted to live again, wishing this nightmare would end, and leave her with rekindled conviction to make things right. But nothing seemed right anymore, it kept going in circles. Perhaps it would go on in its repeating track forever, an endless torment of waiting. Twilight closed her eyes, trapping herself inside the darkness. Somehow it coaxed her into comfort, alone in her solace as she ignored the world around her. 





Noon came and went, Twilight ate something for lunch. She didn't really care to remember exactly what it was, all she knew was she had eaten, thus didn't need to. Despite the idea of food blossoming in her head, dreaming of something sweet. Perhaps she would go to the party, if nothing more than to eat a piece of the cake. 
No, cake wasn't worth that much effort. Twilight sat reading the same page for the hundredth time that afternoon, still retaining none of its knowledge. She blinked, and a gust of wind flew past, sending the book into a whirl of disarray, a sea wave of turning pages crashing against the shore of its hardbound cover. 
Twilight glanced around for a cause to the disturbance, and spotted the window across the room. Carelessly left open to the wind, swinging on neglected hinges that whined their mournful complaints. Begrudgingly she got to her hooves, and walked from her desk to the window. Shutting it in irritation, as she turned back to her arrogant ignorance. She waltzed back to the desk, and proceeded to sit back on her seat that was suddenly no longer there. 
Twilight fell on her rump, hitting the bare floor hard, as stifled laughter crept into her ears. She glanced around to find the stool, just slightly farther than she'd left it. She levitated it in her magic, and sat again. This time, she felt the slight gust and the sound of wind tearing past, as the stool disappeared from beneath her. As she met the ground once more, this time falling on her back with the momentum. 
This time, the squawking laughter echoed from above her. Twilight looked up to find none other than the offender, Rainbow Dash, in hysterical laughter. A gryphon wasn't far behind, rolling across the floor in her fit of joy. Twilight felt the sparks of anger twinkling from her horn, as she lifted herself to her hooves. Her face blossoming in roses of embarrassment, as she shook with exasperation. 

"Rainbow Dash!" Twilight seethed through gritted teeth, eyes narrowed. 

"Twilight Sparkle." Rainbow mimicked. The colorful pegasus suddenly serious on all accounts, staring back with equal intensity. 

Before bursting into laughter once again, causing the consequential moment to evaporate, leaving Twilight confused. Twilight wanted nothing short of levitating every book in the library to beat over the two's heads as they mocked her. She could envision their fear, in a moment of panic as they'd try to flee. None would escape her righteous retribution. They'd see, she could feel her magic reaching out as she contemplated her justice. 

"Give me one good reason I shouldn't make you regret that?" Twilight snarled with animosity. 

"Relax, it's all in good fun," The gryphon spoke, her raspy voice grating to Twilight's ears. 

"It's just a harmless prank." Rainbow Dash justified, brushing off imaginary dust from the stool, before sliding it back towards Twilight. 

Harmless?... Harmless?! I'll show you harmless fun!

Twilight caught the stool in her magic, and contemplated throwing it across the room at the pair of pranksters. She took a deep, long heavy breath, before deciding not to. 

"Well, if you two are done making fools, please leave. I have a lot of studying to do." Twilight lied, turning the pages back to a page that looked familiar enough to it's alien writings. She sat successfully on the stool, but this time a gaseous explosive disruption echoed through the quiet walls. As the whoopee-cushion expelled its held flatulence. 
Laughter exploded from across the room, and Twilight looked to find even Spike trying to fight back his giggles. She levitated the deflated cushion in her magic and tossed it at her scornful audience to her rage. 

"Get Out!" Twilight commanded, pointing a hoof to the door. Trying to restrain what dignity she could into not murdering the two troublemakers on the spot. 

"Alright, enough is enough," Rainbow Dash submitted, "Hey, Gilda let's go..." 

"You're right Dash, it's about time we crashed that pink pony's welcoming party." 

"Oh, by the way, Twilight..." Rainbow paused at the door, glancing back at her book. "You were on page 65, not 47."

The pair departed, setting off in renewed laughter towards the bakery. Twilight watched them go, before glancing at Spike as he tried to keep his fit of laughter from reaching her ears. He failed miserably. Each chuckle adding another needle to her dying pride, as she turned back to the book. She was no longer interested in her 'homework.' Her mind fixating on the ridicule she'd received.  

Perhaps she DID need a break.

Just maybe, it wasn't such a bad idea to attend one of Pinkie Pie's parties for some cake, after all. 

With a smile, Twilight left the desk, walked to the door and pulled the hood of her jacket over her eyes once more. Determination was the symphony to her actions, her mind and body united under a common goal. A delicacy she had heard was best served cold, but today it would burn hotter than coal. Revenge. 





Twilight arrived at Sugarcube Corner, to find Pinkie waiting expectantly at the door, greeting her guests. When she spotted Twilight lingering at the door, Pinkie's eyes lit up with overwhelming happiness. She could barely contain her excitement, as she greeted Twilight to the party. Twilight indulged Pinkie's need for a smile, and exchanged greetings like playing cards. Twilight could see it in her gaze, Pinkie knew. Perhaps she had known all along, that Twilight would be coming to the party. She didn't know how, yet the mystery of Pinkie just kept intriguing her logical mind. Twilight just silently prayed that Pinkie didn't know why she'd come. Twilight didn't want any interference from any outliers she couldn't control. 

"So, what convinced you to come?" Pinkie prodded methodically, "I bet it was the cake, wasn't it?" 

"Yeah, I guess you could say that..." Twilight replied, staring at Rainbow Dash and Gilda, who were across the room. Rainbow had set a cylindrical present on a table laden with others of various sizes. As they continued chatting, the blue mare pegasus kept methodically looking around the room, taking in everything with practiced habit. Twilight's task wouldn't be easy. 

"Well then, I guess you'll have to wait until Gilda blows out the candles for cake. It's cooling in the back as we speak." Pinkie beamed, "So, feel free to enjoy some of the lemon drops, and punch while you wait." 

Pinkie reached a hoof out to shake, which seemed odd, but Twilight didn't want the situation to become awkward. She accepted the gesture with hesitant reproach. A lightning pain enveloped Twilight's fore-hoof, as their hooves met, causing her to  jump back in shock. The unexpected spark of electricity catching her off guard, in a moment of vulnerability Twilight had allowed herself, as Pinkie giggled with laughter. Turning her pink hoof over to reveal some sort of buttoned contraption. 

"Sorry about that," Pinkie apologized with her laughter, "I've been getting ponies and gryphons with that one all day!" 

"Hilarious," Twilight replied, a bit annoyed at herself for falling for such an obvious deceit. She shouldn't have given trust so easily to somepony, just because they were nicer than the rest. She mentally scorned herself for being so foolish, before refocusing on the task at hoof. Revenge. 
However, Twilight found that she had stormed all the way through the streets of Ponyville, from the library to the bakery. Just to realize, she hadn't thought of a perfect way to exact such succulent retribution. She had faced her fear, by coming to a party where all the townsfolk would be gathered, to exact her much desired revenge. Yet, hadn't given any thought, or perceived notions on how to achieve her rightful ambition. 
Twilight decided to leave the pink pony to her greeting, as she no longer wanted any part of the party pony's trickery. Twilight had enough on her mind that she didn't want to be bothered by anypony, nor did she want anyone to bother her. She did however, happened to spot a familiar pegasi cowering off in a far corner. The gentle pale sunlight complexion only reminded Twilight of her failure earlier that week. Perhaps she should apologize to Fluttershy, and so Twilight headed off in her direction, as she began biding her time for the perfect opportunity for justice. Like a snake, hidden in plain sight, just waiting for the time to strike. 
Fluttershy's fleeting eyes met Twilight's when she was halfway to the corner table where the timid pegasi was seated. Twilight thought she saw worry in Fluttershy's gaze, but perhaps it was just accumulated fear from being surrounded by other ponies. The yellow pegasus did seem to shy away from social interactions, and it was surprising to Twilight that she'd even attended a party. Perhaps she'd been dragged here by a more persistent Pinkie Pie's efforts. Or perhaps Fluttershy was too kind to decline the insistent pink party pony's invitation, and thus had felt an inward obligation to attend. That seemed a more logical conclusion, as Twilight reached the table. Unsure of how to even begin the conversation, perhaps an apology about the carrots she'd failed to buy the sweet quiet pegasi. 

"Hey, Fluttershy, about the carrots..." 

"Oh... Hello," The shifty-eyed pegasus replied, a flurry of emotions dancing in her eyes, before settling on polite courtesy. "I was meaning to say 'thank you' for those. You and Spike really were helpful..."

"Oh, r-really?..." Twilight's mind was thrown for a loop as it tried to stop from spinning out of control. Just barely able to construct a hypothesis in time to catch up with reality. She felt dumb being caught off guard yet again, but luckily Fluttershy seemed none the wiser about Twilight's difficulty in reading the room, for all its irony.

"Oh yes, Spike stopped by to deliver them, he said you weren't feeling too well after casting a defensive spell to protect you both during the stampede." Fluttershy glanced around as if looking for the young dragon, but didn't see him. "It was really brave of you. I'm just glad you didn't get hurt over some silly carrots." 

"Oh, right..." Twilight cleared her throat, offering the kindest smile she could fake. "I'm glad Spike was able to deliver them, I wasn't sure he'd be able to find your house all on his own, since I was feeling... Light headed..." Twilight lied through her teeth, putting on the facade of the story already spun without her knowing. 

Spike bought and delivered the carrots? How sweet of him...  I'm glad Fluttershy got her carrots after all...

Just another tally to the points of how useless you really are... He lied about you buying the carrots, just to make you seem less pathetic. How thoughtful of him to give you partial credit, too bad you can't actually be that useful...


Twilight noticed tears were threatening the poor pegasus' eyes at the prospect of injury on her behalf. She tried her best to be reassuring to Fluttershy as best she could, but the conversation kept filling itself with awkward silence. Twilight decided to abandon the speedily sinking ship that was their conversation. Unable to stand the waters of cumbersome quiet pouring into it any longer. It was clear neither of them were very experienced in holding onto a conversation for very long. She did her best to salvage what remained to a natural conclusion, and wandered off again in search of something to eat. 
As Twilight approached the table laden with what remained of most of the morsels that had been prepared. Twilight noticed that for all the other mostly empty trays, the bowl of lemon drops had been mostly untouched. Perhaps they weren't a very popular entree, Twilight decided to try one to find out for herself. 
Twilight levitated one of the candies to her mouth, and flinched in the bitter sour of the lemon, before her tongue found the vanilla to quell the citrus flavor. They weren't bad, just particularly sour, perhaps they needed something extra to balance out the lemon. As Twilight's eyes lay on a tray of seasoning packets nearby, some of which were of spicy pepper. An idea started to bloom. It felt good to have inspiration strike her, as she scanned the room to make sure nopony was watching, as she levitated a generous amount of pepper packs from the dispenser. 
Twilight set to work methodically, pouring the pepper as best she could onto a napkin. The red grains would be too obvious to merely sprinkle on top of the bowl, in some vain attempt that they'd stick to the somewhat solid candies. No, Twilight knew exactly the spell she'd use. It would take some considerable concentration, but she knew she could do it. Twilight, glanced around again, locking eyes momentarily with the wary Rainbow Dash, ever vigilant in her awareness. Only once the pegasus' eyes had moved on, did Twilight turn back to her task at hoof. 
She closed her eyes, feeling with her magic for the small dusts of spice, until she could feel the grainy texture of every piece in her mind. She reached out to the bowl of sour sweets, and willed them to become one and the same. Agonizingly sour to inflaming spice, completely overriding the balance of the vanilla. Twilight focused, until she felt she could pinpoint every candy as well, mentally splitting the powder into organized bits, before unleashing her magic. With a small popping noise, the candies rattled slightly, as the pepper was transported into them. Burrowed deep within the hard crunchy exterior, undetectable from the naked eye. Twilight opened her eyes, to see her magic had worked, and not a moment too soon, as Pinkie materialized out of nowhere to stand at her side. 

"Some party we're having," Pinkie chirped cheerfully, as Twilight folded the empty napkin, and threw it away with the empty packets of peppered spice. Hurriedly leaving no trace as to what she'd just done. 

"Yeah..." Twilight agreed, a little nervous at the prospect of Pinkie finding out she'd spiced the lemon drops. 

"So, why does Sugarcube Corner even have packs of spice anyway?" Twilight asked, finding the first thing she could think of to distract Pinkie from touching the bowl of lemon drops. Anything to misdirect from her secret sabotage.

"Well, you know me. Always looking for new ways to spice up my life!" Pinkie winked, before digging a hoof into the lemon drops. Much to Twilight's dismay, and horror, as she felt despair grip her insides. Tying her stomach into a knot, as Twilight held her breath. Watching helplessly as Pinkie tossed the drop into the air, before catching it on her tongue. Prior to biting down and chewing. Pinkie's smile never melted, as if everything were completely fine. Twilight stammered a little in disbelief, questioning what had happened. Had her magic been off? Had Pinkie just gotten lucky and picked an untarnished piece from the middle? Why hadn't it worked?

"Wow! That one sure was something else!" Pinkie's voice complemented, as the pink mare became visibly fascinated by the candy bowl. She took another one, and another. As Twilight stared on, shocked by how unfazed the pink party pony was by the amount of spice. Surely for anypony else, they'd be running to quench an unquenchable thirst after just one. 

"Hey, Gilda!... Rainbow!" Pinkie shouted across the room, waving the two over. 

"Hey, you gotta try these, they're unexpectedly a blast!" Pinkie exclaimed offering them the bowl. Rainbow glanced skeptically from the bowl, to Twilight, to Pinkie. Saying nothing, but unmoved as she stood, not lifting a hoof to take even one. 

"Vanilla lemon drops," Gilda remarked, "Don't mind if I do..." 

Taking one, and plopping it into her beak. Not a second passed as the gryphon's eyes opened wide. Tears starting to redden them, as her tongue discovered the pepper spice. Visibly struggling against the heat berating her taste. Breathing heavily, as she looked urgently for relief. 

"Quick 'G', the punch!" Rainbow called, pointing off in the direction of neatly rowed drinks. 

As Gilda raced towards them, eager to douse the flames dancing across her tongue. All the while the room of congregated ponies had started to notice the disruption of Gilda making a beeline for the punch. The stage was setting itself perfectly, just waiting for a spark to ignite the lights that would illuminate the darkness of shame and discomfort karmically owed by the hearty fools. Who were now unknowingly participants to this charade. 
Twilight smiled in her secretive brilliance, as the gryphon rushed, raising the plastic cup to ease the burning sensation. Twilight faked a sneeze, turning her head away, just long enough to let a burst of magic bump the cup ever so slightly at its pinnacle of performance. Just a small act, that with its brilliant timing, received amazing results. Sending the liquid running from the bottom of the glass, to assault the greedy gryphon with a full frontal shower of ripened rain. 
Pinkie's laughter was the loudest over the crowd's, as she watched Gilda receive the punch to the face, in this one sided war of attrition. It dripped from Gilda's feathered features, emphasizing the disgrace, as the gryphon gawked in astonishment and surprise. She reached an eager claw for another cup in renewed desperation. 
Twilight merrily laughed, satisfied with her work, but surprisingly fate had further foolery in store for the unfortunate helpless gryphon. The punch of the second cup didn't find its rest in Gilda's beak, instead dripping through a previously unnoticed hole. Finding itself dispatched to soak the floor, instead of quell Gilda's desperate plea for relief. 

"Spiced lemon drops, and punch served in a dribble glass..." Pinkie remarked, like a ringleader announcing a circus. 

"Priceless... Priceless!" Rainbow Dash managed to squeak, from where she lay doubled over, clutching her stomach in laughter. 

"Hilarious..." Gilda brooded, after quenching her thirst with the third cup. Glaring back towards Twilight, or rather more accurately towards Pinkie who was smiling back as the crowd tried to stifle their laughter. 
Twilight was pleased with how well everything was going, now if only she could find a way to repay her dues to a certain rainbow maned mare. Rainbow Dash hadn't fallen for the lemon drops, perhaps slightly suspicious of Pinkie's interference. She'd have to find another opportunity to revel the pegasi, Twilight noted, as she relaxed in the blind-sight of the ponies around her. All of which were still recovering from their fits of contagious laughter. At the expense of a stranger to them all. 
Rainbow did her best to cool down the now visibly grumpy gryphon, suggesting she open some presents. Twilight was weary of any moment to get her revenge on Rainbow Dash, but none presented itself to her. However, one of the presents contained a cylinder of fake snakes, that clearly rustled Gilda's feathers the wrong way. Causing the room to explode with barrels of laughter once more. Gilda's unfortunate circumstances did manage to bring a satisfied smile to Twilight's face, regardless of her involvement. It was perfect, revenge given at the cost of merely being at a party with the entire populace of the town. Twilight cherished the moments, despite how fleeting the feelings of joy she attained from it were. 
However, Twilight would be lying if she said she wasn't becoming a tidbit impatient for cake. Pinkie eventually disappeared into the back, and emerged with Twilight's reward. The cake looked delicious, crafted to perfection. As soon as she saw it, she knew her patience had not been in vain. She would finally get what she came for. Aside from revenge, sweet frosting on top of a well spent cake of fateful justice. She managed just long enough for another idea to strike her when somepony suggested Gilda blow out the candles. Twilight faded into the back of the crowd, but within eye-shot of the cake. It would be perfect, a pinnacle climax to the evening. Despite not being able to exact revenge upon Rainbow Dash. Twilight was smiling, having the time of her life, as she waited for the moment to arrive. 
Gilda reared back, taking in a hefty breath of air. Before proceeding to blow out all the candles in one fell swoop. As ponies began to get excited, Twilight fought back a grin, as she lit her horn. Relighting the flames in an instant. Applause bled into laughter as Gilda tried several more times to extinguish the flames, each time Twilight merely sparked the hot wicks once more. This seemingly bothered the gryphon, and Gilda's irritation fueled Twilight's jubilation. As she smiled smugly, relishing in her victory. 
Gilda gave one final breath, before panting breathless before the cake. The room held its silence for a moment, as Twilight waited a few seconds before relighting the flames. Perhaps her eagerness created a different spark, for the candles began to sputter and sparkle like small fireworks. Melting the candles quickly. Pinkie glanced about a little nervously, meeting eyes with Twilight in helpless understanding, before shouting over the confusion. 

"Everyone hit the deck! It's gonna blow!" 

But it was already too late. As ponies ran for cover, the cake exploded. Plastering the ceiling and walls, anypony unlucky enough to be at the front, and an unfortunate gryphon with creamy colorful cake. Twilight had managed to duck behind the crowd, and was mostly unscathed save a few blots of frosting. A bit surprised at the outcome, she didn't think she'd done anything extra other than simply relight the normal candles. Perhaps something was off, nonetheless. She surveyed the scene, and felt a small flurry of triumph at the sight of a cream covered multi colored maned pegasus. Rainbow 'Danger' Dash, had received a significant majority of the blast. Equal to the amount Gilda was shaking from herself. The pegasus looked a bit shell shocked, but burst into laughter a few seconds later. Followed by the rest of the crowd as ponies shook cake from their fur. 

"Well, I've never seen relighting candles do THAT before!" She called between fitful chuckles. 

Pinkie licked the cakes remnant in one fell swoop, laughing at the outcome as well. Finding Twilight in the crowd, and Twilight could see it in the pink mare's eyes. But what did she see? It was hard to define fully, but Twilight felt unease crawling its way inside her skin. Causing her to shift uncomfortably, as she pulled herself away from the party pony's gripping gaze. 

"That was an unexpected BLAST!" Pinkie chimed from across the room. "Though, perhaps we can have some fun with a few party games!" 

"How about pin the tale on the pony?" Somepony else chimed in, and the crowd was once more lifted into whimsical merriment. 
Twilight didn't care to spend another second inside the bakery. She had come for the cake, and petty revenge. At least she would be leaving with one of those in tow. She took the opportunity of the distraction of party games, to take her leave. She did however, levitate the few bits of frosting from her mane that had nestled there from the blast. The sugar was sweet, but Twilight's rightfully earned revenge was sweeter. She left the townsfolk none the wiser of her actions, but Pinkie knew. Somehow Twilight understood that Pinkie ALWAYS knew. 
The walk back to the library was long, but Twilight wasn't in any hurry. Nightfall had crept upon the lonely town like a thief. Stealing away the daylight, as Twilight trudged onward towards the only place that had started to feel like home, as of late. And as she returned to the prison walls of familiarity, so too did the nagging ghosts that haunted her ceaselessly.  





A lonely wagon rolled into the town of Ponyville. The weary traveler pulling it was alone, as night soothed the minds of many. Yet many more were filing from the last lit building. A solitary bakery, at the curtain close of a party. A lively performance now coming to an end. The traveler didn't bother stopping in for any sweets. Money had been rather scarce lately. So she merely passed on, parking her caravan of one, near the town's center. Tomorrow would come early. So once the wheels had been fastened by some hefty rocks, the blue moonlit traveler retired for the night. Without a supper, but a dream. Repeating the lie that she told herself; that one day she would be revered as Great and Powerful once more.
> Chapter 6: A Restitution of Pride
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


A Restitution of Pride


Sunday came with an early dawning, cutting through the curtains, to meet Twilight's sleepless gaze. She couldn't recall when she'd dozed into a dreamless dark, or if she had at all. Perhaps she hadn't slept a wink, but the sunbeams assaulted her vision all the same. Twilight turned away, as her tear-less eyes fixated on the darkness of the library's confining comfort. Inwardly cursing the sun, hoping it would flee back beyond the horizon. Leaving her to wallow in misery for her eternity. Everything was exhausting. 
Twilight withheld a heavy sigh, as she heard Spike stirring from his bedside basket nearby. She waited, listening as he groggily greeted a new day, opening the bedroom window to let a frigid gust of gentle morning dew into the hollow halls of the library. Before he wandered off to fix a breakfast for two, but only one would enjoy that meal today. Twilight was tired beyond anything she'd ever felt. The world felt crushing around her, as she lay under the blankets that seemed to bind her to the bed with her body's sleepless exhaustion. The effort just wasn't worth the fight, today. 
Her bed had become a sanctuary, the last thread holding her salvation, but now. Even that felt taxing. At least the darkness couldn't rule her actions, when she had none to take. The voices sedated and quiet, yet just beyond the threshold of becoming truly awake. Twilight found comfort in the darkness of her closed eyes, as nothing existed in her sight. The misery acceptable to the taste, in the passing moments of mourning. The clock on the wall, the only indication of passing time, as Twilight lay bundled in her own calamity. Wishing that perhaps today would be the day. 
The designation of her suffering, at the hooves of a benevolent ruler. Perhaps the time was nigh, Twilight wished the day would come. Hopefully sooner, than never at all. The waiting was a punishment all to itself. A torturous twinge to Twilight's soul, every passing morning. Only relieved by the short passing of nightfall.

The clock's ticking away, isn't it... Will you regret all this wasted time once you're finished? Or will you cherish the few days you have left, like a fool? It's almost been a whole week... How much longer do you think you have to squander?

The darkness laughed, mocking as it ever did. Ceaselessly untiring of its tormenting, as Twilight ignored it. Today she would sleep. Who cared if Celestia herself wished her to rise? Twilight was going to make a stand, by lying down. Fully content in drifting back into sleep. Despite how little she had found herself capable of, as of late. She was completely intent on defiantly staying put.

"Come one, Come All!" The words sudden, and abrasive, cut through the quiet morning to pester Twilight's ears. 

"Come and witness the amazing spectacle that is, the Great and Powerful Trrrrrrixie!"

Twilight rolled back to the open window, finding the pretentious tone of this 'Trixie' beyond tiresome. With a menial effort, Twilight summoned the magic needed to swing the window shut. Latching it closed, in a vain attempt to banish the pandemonium from the walls of her haven. The noise only grew as Twilight sat up enough to watch a crowd beginning to form in the streets. Twilight wanted to scream, but all that escaped her debilitated voice was an angered growling sigh. 

Couldn't the town stop being so... So... obnoxious? 

Twilight levitated one of her pillows and squeezed it to her face, clamping hooves over her ears, trying to block out the braggart. Only managing to muffle the words, but the jeering crowd's applause and laughter remained. Morphing into a constant note of blaspheme bass treble, to the pounding drums inside Twilight's head. She didn't know how long she lay there, hoping for a release from the torturous drabble, but it felt like a short moment of eternity passing on in vanity.
As Trixie did her bit, telling tales of her own great heroic deeds. Whether or not those claims were true. Twilight's patience was waning, as she found herself being forced from her rest. And the comfort of expired confetti, glittered bedding. As Twilight fell lethargically from the bed, every movement an agony to her lazed lassitude. Slothing from the room, as she escaped deeper into the library, from the hubbub outside the walls of her sanctified silence. Seeking the quietest corner, as she mindlessly picked a book to disregard. 
She sat on the cold floor, wrapped in a comfort of her own resentment, as her mind boiled in her anger. Nothing seemed to go right for her anymore. Everything was an annoyance, the world hated her, and Twilight was willingly hating the world right back. This 'Trixie' was just another cruel foil of fate, tempting her to act, but Twilight would not act in this curtained stage of destiny's grand performance. No, she would simply wait, until she could fall back into restless sleep. Whether this 'Trixie' happened to remain or not. 

But what if this Trixie never leaves? Perhaps you could remove her from the proximity yourself?

The thought did seem tempting, and Twilight found her tired mind fixating upon the inclination. Perhaps something could be done to deal with Trixie's disruption.
It took a bit of searching, but Twilight found a spell she'd rarely remembered, buried deep inside one of the many countless tomes of the library. It was simple. She could've cast it in her sleep; and saved herself the effort of being awoken by such a thoughtless, self-centered careless, egotistic Trixie. It was Twilight's last salvation. A spell of forced silence within any designated area she dare choose. It would be simple enough to simply cast it on her bedroom. This was going to be a breeze. 
Twilight rose triumphantly, book in hoof, as she hastily made her way back into the cacophony of her bedroom, locking the door behind her as she wanted no disruption in her act of secrecy.  Making her way to the window, and glaring down at the offenders below. Glaring maliciously a few seconds, before raising the book and turning to the empty room before her. The spell would last a good 24 hours it said, and that was only a small amount of time compared to however long Twilight wished it would last. She closed her eyes. Tracing the pattern of the spell in her mind, repeating the words as they were mumbled into the quieting air. She felt her horn gathering the required energy to bend the ethereal magic around her. Twisting it to be her own, to follow her command, waiting until she felt its writhing resistance fade away. Obedience attained to her will and pleasure, as the magic was released like water flowing through the room, and beyond. 
The silence was deafening, instant, and dizzying. Twilight stood swaying for a few seconds as she adapted to its effectiveness. Pure silence, not even her own breathing, or heartbeat disrupting her ears. She might as well have been deaf for all the good it was. Joyous silence, bubbled within her glee, as she excitedly leapt to her bed. Perhaps she would do the same tomorrow, and the day after. On and on for eternity! The thought of Celestia barging into the room to demand for Twilight's atonement, only to find herself unheard by any, was comical to the dreary unicorn. As she relinquished herself once more in her sanctuary of fortitude silence. 





Something was wrong. Trixie was surrounded by adoration, her prized joy that filled her with ecstatic life. As the crowd swelled, and cheered to her powerful stories of greatness. As she did small acts of prestidigitation between her boastful claims. The cheers were deafening, praising, as she basked in its glory. Until all was quiet. 
Trixie opened her eyes, to find the crowd quickly coming to the same confusion. Their clear cheers and hollering of jubilations and worship, unheard by any. As Trixie stammered for silenced words. Was she even talking?

What was going on?

Something was very wrong...

Panic was beginning to spread through the crowd, like a silent wildfire. Trixie could see it in their eyes, terror and confusion. Madness. All was ascending into madness. Something had to be done, someone had to calm their quiet cacophonous panic. 
Trixie ignited her horn, sending several spectral dancing lights that imitated fireworks at her command. Taking a moment to seize their attention, as she wrote words into the very air. Sending a message to ease their worry. Seeing the simple act keeping the crowd from falling into a mindless mob of uncontrollable chaos. 

Remain calm, this is nothing to be alarmed about...

All is going to be fine. 

I, the great and powerful Trixie, will do what I can to get to the bottom of this mysterious silence. 

Trixie promised, setting a plan in motion, that she hoped wouldn't completely backfire. Perhaps there was a range to this mystery's limits. Trixie asked for several volunteers, as she commanded the rest of the ponies to remain calm, and return home to wait until a solution could be found. 
As the crowd slowly dispersed, some more hastily than others. Trixie turned to her few voluntary helpers, two of which were rather younger unicorns. One a pale turquoise with bright firecracker hair. The other a rather zoned out copper furred unicorn with a greenish mane and tail, who regarded her with a lackadaisical look that gazed beyond her. Trixie didn't really care, perhaps they'd get the job done. She set about explaining her plan, directing them to take a direction and travel until they could hear again. She suggested they could hum, sing, or something as they went. The test was a simple one, perhaps they'd find it was a smaller area of effect, at least that's what she wished to find out. As she silently hoped she'd only have to merely mover her wagon and stage a little ways. She'd received a few bits for her morning performance, but not as much as she'd hoped. 
She left them with a final rule, directing them to only go to the town's limits, and no farther. For their own 'safety.' She didn't want any foolish foals getting lost in the nearby forest just because she'd asked them to find a limit to a mysterious silence. Before not even knowing if a limit could be found. Besides, it would be useless to set up her stage outside of the bustling small town. 
She paired the two younger unicorns together in a group, they seemed more capable together than alone. Sending them in the direction of whatever direction seemed farthest away from the aforementioned forest. 
Trixie returned to her wagon, packing up her stage, she would have to see about getting some sort of breakfast, and then. With a little luck, she'd be back in business before the day was through. 
She had little intention on worrying about fixing the odd silence, perhaps it was some magic cast by another strong unicorn. The thought of such a unicorn in close proximity bothered her. Perhaps this was a heckler's roundabout way of showing her up. Perhaps it was a test. Trixie admittedly knew she didn't know a lot about complex magic, but she was the best in the business. At least she affirmed herself of such a lie once more. 
Avoiding the truth she wouldn't believe, she didn't want to be reminded of her failing past mistakes. Years of magic school, being laughed at and mocked for her incapabilities. Being shamed for her unique way of using her unicorn magic. These nightmares were still haunting, but eased by the pain of her pride. Those ponies had just been unappreciative of her greatness. At least these ponies of Ponyville had good taste, able to recognize the true talent of her power. Trixie silently vowed it would NEVER happen to her again, never again would she make a mistake or be ostracized for her great and superior power. After all, she was Trixie the Great and Powerful, she reminded herself. As she set off in search of a cheap meal to call breakfast.





Twilight awoke to the sound of silence. It was deafeningly quiet, as her tired bones ached of sleep. Her stomach was screaming for food, yet Twilight had no appetite for such things. She was a fat, greedy, undeserving slob of a pony. She wanted nothing more than to wither and die in her unending sleep. Yet the light from her sheltered windows was blinding to her gaze. Slipping mercilessly through the curtain's cracks, to stab her corneas with unwelcome warmth. Twilight found herself staring up at the ceiling, perhaps she needed to get up. Perhaps there were things that needed tending to. 

I don't care. 

They could all rot in Tartarus for all I care. 

Twilight groaned, as she heard fate calling, keeping her mind busy. Unable to relinquish to her rest. Punishing her for her laziness, but Twilight didn't care. She simply rolled over, for the hundredth time, and fought with her emotions for control. Wrangling her sadness and depression into a messy ball of feelings. 

Ugh, feelings, what useless trash... 

She agreed with the dark, as she threw them away. Neglecting to feed them with her heart, like the parasites they were. They didn't serve her, rather latched onto her suffering. Depleting her strength, but she was stronger than them. The darkness was right, emotions were weakness, and a slave driver. Thus, the sooner she overpowered them, and threw them out the better. They were weeds, not the promised roses that fools mistook them for. No, her mind was a garden, and emotions the weeds. Her heart the fruit of her labors, as she did what she pleased. 
Twilight wanted to be awake, that's all there was to it. She wasn't being kept awake by some stupid sunlight, or noise. No, she wanted to find solace in her sleepless suffering. And in her misery, she found her company. 
The darkness was her friend, and she would cultivate it. It numbed the pain, it made her feel nothing. And in the cruel world in which Twilight lived. Nothing, felt better than the agony of her sins. 





Trixie returned to her wagon, having bought a cheap hayburger and fries. She had found the restaurants and cafes mostly deserted, thanks to the afflicted silence. Some had even closed down for the day. Anyone who had been open had found their own ways of getting around the need for communication. From post it notes written hastily, to simple pointing at menus. It was nice to see the surprise from the pony behind the counter, as Trixie placed her order with glittery pale blue writing, written in the air. 
It was admittedly a bit of a splurge from the morning's earnings to order some fast food. But if her treasured score was anything to judge by, perhaps she'd stay a while in this backwater town. It wasn't anything like Canterlot, and their high societal expectations. But rather a laid-back town with a lethargic peace that was easy to stir up into the excitement of her grandeur. Malleable to her whims, and generous in its supportive offerings. 
Trixie loved the feeling it brought, easily obtained with the least effort. She had been practicing her performance for moons, since her travels began, and it felt good to find her reward so readily given. It was refreshing the admiration the ponies could give, from such a small populace. Trixie wanted more of it, neigh she NEEDED more of it! 
It wasn't long, as Trixie lost herself in her own thoughts, before the first volunteers reported back. The pegasi submitting to her a written report of being unable to find a limit within the town. The more eager scouts, had found its barrier ending several gallops away from the outermost Ponyville homes. The unicorns imitated her own strategy of using magic to write their messages in the air. Easily understood, at least from one perspective. Trixie had found they weren't very adept at mirroring their writing, like herself. This small detail boosted her confidence ever so slightly, as she found it amusing. 
Much to Trixie's reluctance, it seemed she wouldn't be moving her wagon a few blocks away to avoid the overcast quiet. The magical mystery had overshadowed the entire town in its relentless injustice. Much like unwanted weather, Trixie would have to either deal with it, or wait it out. Neither of which, she wanted. 
The pair of foals had yet to return, but Trixie figured their report wouldn't be any different. Perhaps they'd gotten distracted from their task, they were young children after all. Regardless she'd gained the knowledge she needed. Now, to decide what needed to be done. It was most certainly a spell, perhaps another could undo it. Trixie reluctantly knew she probably wouldn't find such a thing in the few books she carried in her wagon. Most of which were of stage magic, and visual effects. Trixie didn't like reading, at least not a lot of it. But perhaps, today she'd have to accept the help from searching through a library. 
It didn't take long, as she found to her surprise, that she'd been near it all along. It had been a little embarrassing, having asked one of her scouts about a library. To have them, simply point to the fancy structure that had been built inside a hollowed out tree. Trixie had thought nothing of the mysterious structure, sure it stuck out like a sore hoof. Among all the other cookie cutter homes of the town, but she'd thought perhaps it was just the architect's unique taste in design. 
Regardless, Trixie approached the quiet abode, knocked a few times. Before realizing that the knocking probably wouldn't be heard. However, the door flew open, as a scaly blur crashed full speed into her. Trixie brushed some dust from her cloak, and adjusted her hat with her magic. Before regarding the young dragon who was hastily picking up an old dusty book, flipping back to a predetermined page, until he fully took in Trixie's splendor. 
The dragon's eyes grew wide, at the realization of her greatness, and he wasted no time in opening the book and holding it up for her to see. Gesturing frantically to a page that contained archaic runes and words. Trixie inspected it quizzically, skeptic of the magic before determining it could possibly work. This was going to be a cakewalk, Trixie readjusted some of the order of the magic in her mind, as she set about twisting the magic to what she felt was right. A few words of the incantation mumbled in the silence, perhaps a bit out of order. But all was fine, Trixie could feel it, this was going to work! She could feel her power gathering, she could feel it writhing its chaotic whims. Like an untamed beast, and she felt its living energy inside her. She loved the feeling, cherished her greatness, and superiority. As she released the wild magic into the town of Ponyville. 





Twilight was minding her own business when it happened. The unwelcome intrusion to her peace. The silence evaporated in the blink of an eye. Flooding her ears like the roaring of a thunderclap. The fallout of an explosion, as sound was restored once more to the world around her. 

No, this wasn't right! What happened to my magic?...

My silence?... my freedom... 

Twilight felt the agony of the chaos, as she bit back the urge to scream in her agony. As the sound assaulted her unsuspecting ears. Like a flooded dam bursting, and washing away her sanctuary in one swell swoop. Twilight lay in her bed, adjusting to the harsh return of chaos. Seething through the tolerable pain, until the oncoming headache was all that remained to her suffering. 
She stumbled out of bed, shaking off the daze in her mind, as she exhaled a groan. Except it sounded a lot like the revving of a motor. Twilight gasped, the sound belonging to the intake of air replaced by the squeaking of a rusty hinge. 

What is going on? 

Twilight quickened her pace, her hoof-steps echoing with interchanging sound effects, like some kind of laughable comedic cartoon. Twilight unlocked and threw open the door, as it clattered with a generic sound of impact and whistling air. Before storming downstairs to find out what in Tartarus was going on.
Her tirade only lasted to the front door, as she found Spike in the doorway losing his laughter. As he found his speech replaced by random sounds, testing it over in his hilarity of the circumstance. The intruder she found on the other hand, made Twilight's hatred boil to the surface from its deep pit it had been hidden in. Procuring an intense glare at the pale blue of the street magician, Twilight recognized immediately. 

Trixie!... Of course, it would be HER!... 

Twilight could feel her horn sparking with the intent of use, as she imagined relinquishing justice for self-righteous retribution. An eye for an eye, as they say. She could do so many things, make this Trixie suffer for her actions, cast upon her mortal frame so much pain. Twilight wanted to see fear in her eyes, as she so easily could have forced the desperate emotion into that foolish unicorn. But she didn't, because she didn't care. Or at least that's what she told herself, as she resigned to speaking her dismays to the intrusive meddler. 
Twilight made to tell the unicorn off, and was greeted once more by random pandemonium escaping her lips. Instead of the intended words. This didn't make Twilight's message any clearer as it was loud, but rather did alert Trixie to her presence. As the blue mare snapped out of her surprise at the chaos she'd caused. A few bits of laughter tugged at Trixie's lips, as it was replaced with the sound of a gurgling stream. Which shut the stupid magician up quite nicely, as Trixie raised a hoof to her lips in surprise. Twilight merely smiled venomously back. Trying to burn a hole through Trixie with her pinpointed stare, to no avail. 
Twilight then noticed the dropped spell book on the front step, and levitated it effortlessly to her, as she read the spell she assumed had backfired. She didn't waste a second casting it on herself, fixing her own voice, as Spike continued to fail to keep his bursting laughter in check. Its sounds echoing with various honks and disruptive clamorous noises. 
Twilight cleared her throat, before testing to see if her magic had worked on herself, and herself alone. Before delivering a dry welcome to the 'guest' of hers. 

"Hello, can I help you?" Twilight asked. 

Levitating the book back to a random shelf. She didn't care if it was in order or not, as she sought to do the same for several others carelessly strewn about the floor. Probably in a panicked search for a cure to Twilight's sweet silence. 
Trixie went to speak, and more chaotic clamor escaped her lips. As she quickly shoved a hoof in her mouth to stop the nonsense. Twilight merely smiled back in her silent triumphant victory.
Trixie nodded a yes to Twilight's question. Gesturing from the bookshelfs to Twilight, and then herself and the rest of the town. As her ignited horn wrote frantic words into the air. A nifty trick, but Twilight wasn't fooled into the awe of Trixie's trickery. 

Can you fix this? I tried to fix the silence cast on the town, but I might have accidentally cast the spell wrong... 

"So, you want me to fix the problem YOU caused now?" Twilight asked definitively. 

Yes! 

"No," Twilight refused, using her magic to drag Spike by his tail back into the library, in order to slam the door on Trixie with her magic. But Trixie kept the door from shutting with her own magic. Her eyes meeting Twilight's with a determination to succeed. 

Would you at least fix the town? I was trying to help by taking away the unfortunate silence it was put under, by something or somepony... Please, help me, help them?

Silence selfishly cast on the town by somepony, eh? 

The darkness coed, letting Twilight's mind work to a logical conclusion. Had she accidentally cast her spell on the entire town, instead of only her room? The idea of causing such inconvenience on the unsuspecting populace made Twilight determined to bury the cause deep in her closet of secrets. She would never claim responsibility of something so careless, surely there would be some punishment if she owned up to such a mistake. She had been so careful in casting the spell too, she was certain. But now Twilight was second guessing her own judgement. 

Will you please help them? Trixie asked, her gaze almost begging like a forlorn puppy. 

"Sure, I'll help them..." Twilight smirked, realizing a loophole in Trixie's request. Relishing in her genius, as she summoned the magic, taking care to control it with precision as best she could. Borrowing its power as it manifested in her glowing aura of violet splendorous hue. Before releasing it to wash over like a tsunami wave crashing through the streets of Ponyville. However, Twilight redirected its flow from enveloping Trixie, curing every-pony else, except the prideful magician. As the magic faded, and Twilight's head exploded in fresh throbbing pain from her mental strain. She regarded Trixie with interest, waiting for the unicorn mare to realize the truth. 

"Happy now?" She pried, baiting Trixie into a response. 

Trixie opened her mouth, as if to give some parting words, but was cursed by her prior personal failing of an attempt at restoring the sound Twilight had banished from the town. The confusion was written in her expression of shock, as she coughed several times and tried again. Yet to no avail. Staring back at Twilight, dumbfounded. 

"I helped you, help them," Twilight explained smiling smugly. Helping to catalyst the enlightenment dawning on the dunce unicorn, as to what Twilight had done, while the realization washed over Trixie. 
Twilight levitated the book, with the spell she'd used, from where she'd put it. Thrusting it forcefully into Trixie's chest. Waiting for the magician's magic to accept the book's load, before releasing it. 

"You might need to borrow this," Twilight remarked in the best condescending tone she could muster. "It was page 132 to be precise. You're welcome!"

Good ridance!

And with that, Twilight turned from the door, slamming it in Trixie's face once and for all. Satisfied with her own job well done. 
> Chapter 7: Confrontations and Fears
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


Confrontations and Fears


Twilight awoke to a snowfall of smoldered ash, that blanketed the entire landscape outside the window. Its white fragility drifting in the wind, intoxicating the air with polluted reverie. As Twilight watched on, entranced by the display before her. The eerie ethereal haze, as smoke loomed overhead. Blotting out the sun's harshest rays. On what was supposed to be a sunny day. 
Twilight continued on to the kitchen, finding warmth in the jacket wrapped around her fragile form, and the comfort of the grey tones filtering through the window glass. Complementing her loneliness. Dancing in shadowed particles as the soot fell ever thicker. Coating the cruel cold world outside in its warmth. As Twilight set about preparing something to feed her sickly starvation. Her self imposed fast a last ditch effort to atone for her salvation. As Twilight sat at the table with little more than an unseasoned bowl of oatmeal, and a cup of sour tea. Its warmth exhaled, defying gravity, as it sat steaming.  Twilight watched it with equal reverie, before staring lifelessly out the window. Losing herself to the moment, as nothing really mattered, anymore. It would all be over, eventually.
Perhaps something should have been done days ago, but Twilight didn't care. She reveled in the suffering as the smell of hellfire ebbed deeper throughout the land of Equestria. The dark clouds covering the vast horizon, as Twilight took another sip of tea. The air was sickening with the lingering scent of flaming ruin, only growing stronger every time somepony dared slip in and out of the library. Perhaps by now the odor would never fully be gone from the place. Even if Twilight did what she had been ordered. 
The letters lay piled on the table. The sight of them sending chills down her spine every time Twilight dared to look at their crumpled parchment. They kept coming, each one more desperate and stern than the last. The first of which had been written, and received on the day the ash had first started to fall. Spike had opened it, before Twilight could confiscate and dispose of the Celestia damned paper. The instructions were clear, and concise in their demands. 

Scale the mountain.

Confront the Dragon.

Stop the source of the smoke... By ANY means necessary...

Twilight lethargically gazed out at the compiling mounds of dust outside. Taking another sip from her cup, as she found its unsugared taste bitter. Fitting for her treacherous disregard of her goddess' command. A call to arms, that Twilight would not obey. 

Why bother? I'd only manage to buck it up worse, and suffer further humiliation and demotion... 

Twilight was interrupted by the door to the library flying open, demanding her attention as somepony intruded upon her abode. But Twilight merely ignored the commotion. 

Spike will deal with whoever it is...

"Where is She?!" The disruptive voice demanded, as it clattered through the miserable silence. 

Twilight didn't bother to move, just continued to watch the peaceful fall of destructive brilliance, as it danced across the air. Even as the hoofsteps echoed with the sound of decompressing, deflated party balloons. The sound of the most depressing confetti cannon blast ever, lived and died in the silence. As Twilight was showered in a pitiful display of shredded paper. 

"If that's your attempt at bringing some cheer, it didn't work." Twilight sneered. 

"That isn't why I'm here, Twilight." The response was flatter than the kitchen table, and bluntly cutting. Eerily off-putting coming from the pink mare, that Twilight had never seen even a hint of sadness from. Twilight shifted her gaze ever so slightly, so she could see Pinkie's reflection in the window pane's glass. 
Pinkie's hair had surprisingly been combed, for once. Leaving the chaotic tangle, nothing more than a flat river reminiscent of expired fruitpunch. 

"Then why are you here, Pinkie?" Twilight asked, not caring in the least bit.

"It's Pinkamena Diane Pie to you," The words were hissed sharply into Twilight's ears, "and I'm here to make things right..." 

"Oh? What's the point?" Twilight's hollow response was all that reached through the divide between the two mares. 

"I'm HERE to make things RIGHT..." Pinkamena insisted through gritted teeth. As she brought out a party horn from her saddlebag, and proceeded to blow it. Her frown only causing the horn to sound like a dying duck, as it faded and died in it's pathetic squeal. 
She proceeded to discard the horn onto the floor, in careless disregard. Twilight had several questions, but they went unsaid, as Pinkamena interrupted her refusals. 

"What does 'making things right' have to do with me?" Twilight questioned skeptically. 

"I'm sure you already know, Twilight. I'm here to make sure you do your job." Pinkamena replied to her cynical doubts all the same. 

"And what 'job' is that, exactly?" 

"I'm here, to make sure you get out there, and fix THIS mess!" Pinkamena gestured to the slowly dying world outside. 

"And I'm here to do it, by any means necessary." Her frown thickened, as her brow furrowed. Determination that started to scare Twilight, as she found her eyes beginning to dart. Anywhere and everywhere except to meet Pinkie's reflected gaze. 

"Why me?" Twilight asked, interrupting Pinkie's monologue, "The world doesn't revolve around Me! Somepony else can do it, somepony else can fix THIS... The fate of Equestria doesn't depend on me doing shit! And it most certainly DOESN'T rely on me making FRIENDS!..." Twilight burst, all her rage, anger, and malice thrown into her denials. Berating Pinkie with the harsh stinging words.
Pinkamena merely waved the argumentative confrontation aside. There was no time for this. 

"I'm only going to ask this once; Will you come help me deal with the dragon, Twilight Sparkle?" Pinkamena's glare was steadfast and unmoving. If glass could shatter at a mere glance, Pinkamena Diane Pie's could have shattered steel in that moment. 

"No," Twilight declined Pinkie's invitation. Her resilience had been set, her determination in watching the world suffer everlasting. As she continued to stare outside the window. Emotionless, and uncaring, as she resigned to watching the world burn. So she could fan the flames, that would inevitably engulf her misery and tormented soul as well. 
Pinkie's gaze fell to the floor in defeat, she hadn't wanted to do this. 

Not this soon... 

But desperate times called for desperate measures, and Pinkamena Diane Pie would not allow her home to burn. The Equestria she loved, slowly dying around her, as the smiles faded fast before the plague. No one was smiling now. 

Not even Pinkie Pie... 

She knew she couldn't do a lot, but she could fix this. Pinkamena HAD to make things RIGHT, and so she did what she'd promised herself never to do again. She erased what had been written, in order to change fate, but more importantly the script, for the 'Betterment of All'. At least that's what she told herself, as she began to rewrite the script. 


"Of course I'll help, Pinkamena." Twilight looked back to the pink mare, confusion on her face slightly. As the words spilled from her purple lips without hesitation. Her bewilderment at accepting the proposterous proposition, befuddled her confused mind. 

She had just refused, hadn't she? Twilight was positive of it... Something felt VERY wrong...

"NO! NO I WON'T! Why did I agree to th

"Come on then, we shouldn't waste anymore time." Pinkamena Diane Pie replied, giving Twilight an already packed saddlebag of her own. Never once bothering to crack the smile Twilight had come to expect from the Ponyville party pony. Twilight accepted the saddlebag, and used her own magic to place it on her back. Slightly struggling under the new burden as she stood. 

"NO! This isn't right! You can't MAKE

Pinkamena Diane Pie led the way, as Twilight paused, digging her heels as Twilight followed her lead. Willingly participating in the journey ahead. Twilight noticed drops of water along the floor, and realized that Pinkie Pie was.... Crying? but didn't care as to how they'd gotten there. She met Pinkamena at the door, the deflated pony somber as she spoke. 

"I'm sorry... I have to do this..." Pinkamena wouldn't meet Twilight's gaze, just simply marched on in their funeral parade. Leaving hoofprints to follow in the previously untarnished snowing ash. 

"Sorry about what?" Twilight asked as she quickened her own pace to catch up to the pink mare. The streets around them completely empty, as they marched on through the hibernating town of Ponyville. 

"Oh, nothing to worry your little head about..." Pinkamena replied, offering a dwindling smile that only mocked the true thing she was capable of.
Twilight followed her as they began to reach the outskirts of the town, where a nervously twitching Fluttershy was waiting. An equally heavy looking saddlebag hefted by the shaking frightened yellow pegasi. Twilight glanced over to Pinkamena quizzically as they approached. 

"We're bringing Fluttershy?" Twilight asked questioningly. "Instead of, oh I don't know, Spike? Another dragon!" 

"Yes," Pinkamena responded flatly, deadpan as the rocks beneath their hooves, as they walked. Nearing the rendezvous in the road, closest to the mountain. It's highest heights hidden in the ever growing smog. Another disruption echoed from it, as fresh plumes of intoxication billowed from the unseen mountain top. 
Twilight gulped in the bitter air, she no longer wanted to be outside. She wished to flee back to her sanctity of the library. Ignore the stench of the dying world around her, and sip that sweet Celestia damned unstomachable tea. The problem had grown so much worse in the last week, than she could have ever imagined. 
Gathering her magic, Twilight made a break for it, teleporting away in a vain attempt to escape. Running for the library's safety and comfort.

"I can't do thi

Twilight swallowed her courage with the lump in her throat, forced to confront the reality before her. As she followed Pinkamena and Fluttershy onward. Ever farther from her precious library, and books. Onward, ever onward to certain death and destruction. Twilight couldn't run, no matter how many times she tried. It was hopeless, unable to escape her insurmountable responsibility. Pinkamena and Fluttershy had stopped up ahead, waiting for Twilight to catch up, as she dragged her hooves. Prolonging the unavoidable outcome of confrontation. 
Fluttershy kept looking in all directions, nervously twitching as they grew ever nearer to the mountain. Ever more a flight risk on their operation, as the air grew ever heavier with the sulfuric suffering. 

"How could this have gotten this bad?" Twilight asked, coughing in the rugged air. As they paused to catch what little breath they could. 

"You're the one who kept neglecting to do anything about it..." Pinkamena shot back, the accusation sharp and cutting, as Twilight's heart twinged in the small pain of guilt. 
They continued on in silence, stopping every so often to catch their labored breath. --The-smoke-suffocating-as-they-trudged-on,-nowhere-else-to-go-but-forward.--Their-steps-growing-heavier,-as-they-each-struggled-against-the-dizzying-intoxication-poisoning-their-lungs.--It-wasn't-surprising-to-Twilight-when-Fluttershy-was-the-first-to-collapse-from-exhaustion.--The-smoke-had-become-so-thick,-she-could-barely-make-out-the-crumpled-form,-as-Twilight-tripped-over-the-fallen-pegasus.--A-small-exhaled-squeak-the-only-sign-Fluttershy-was-capable-of-feeling-pain.--Still-alive.--

"NO!"

Good for her...

--Twilight-lay,-wondering-if-this-was-how-she-would-die.--Choking-on-smoke,-as-her-lungs-filled-with-laziness.--Giving-way-to-death's-embrace.--The-haze-was-being-swallowed-in-the-blackness,-as-Twilight-welcomed-the-cold-fangs-of-demise.--Unwilling-to-rise,-and-give-any-more-fight.--As-all-faded-to-black,-Twilight-found-her-smile.--  

"STOP!" Pinkamena cried trying to erase the story again, and again. Desperation-

Pinkamena rushed to her friend's side, dropping her bag as she reached inside. Bringing out a tank of compressed air, to hel- She knelt next to Twilight, checking for any signs of life. Still a pulse, still ALIVE! She quickly checked Fluttershy's status as well. Finding them both passed out, struggling to breath. They wouldn't last long, perhaps she could get them farther down the mountain, to a safer place. But she could feel the hazy exhaustion already in her own blood. As she felt the air around her hard to move through, like water. Weighing her down, as she struggled against the depressive haze.


"Please, don't do this..." Pinkamena begged the nothingness. Tears stinging her eyes, as hope was swiftly snuffed out within her. As she reached into her bag once more, wishing for what she needed. Praying that her empty bag would bestow her a merciful gift, written into existence by her will. Finding the superest-duperest author, kind and merciful, giving her the gift to save their lif- But it didn't come. 

"PLEASE! I'm sorry I broke my promise! Just help me once more!..." Pinkamena collapsed into a fit of sobs, as she continued to search her bag. "PLEASE! I"M SO, SO SORRY!"

Everything was fading, as Pinkamena tried desperately to fix things. Desperate to live, to hold on. But the sedative of lacking air to clearly breath was slowly weighing her down. As she resorted to trying to carry her friends back down the mountain. Hoping beyond hope that she would make it. 

But she couldn't... 

"You've already taken my smile, my joy! What more do you want? Please, whatever it is, I'll do it! I'll-" Pinkamena promised, coughing contagiously, as she fell to the earth beneath her unsteady hooves. The blood rushing through her ears, echoing in her mind's silence. Usually the answer would come, but now... All was left unspoken in the deathly silence. 





Pinkamena heard the sound of hurried feet. A nose sniffing along the ground, as the quiet was dispelled by the sound of approaching hoofsteps. A wet tongue licked her face, as Pinkamena groaned her dismal desperate cry for help. Followed by another fit of coughs. 
This set off a cacophony of loud barking jubilation, that made Pinkamena feel hope's merciful embrace once more. Smiling to herself, as she knew. All would be fine in the end, despite the temporary painful strife. The barking continued as the hoofsteps drew even nearer. 

"Woah, neillie!" The familiar voice called out, as the hooves quickened their pace. Running to the collapsed trio, Pinkamena tried to rise, trying to speak through her dry throat. Unable of words as she tried to get up, but felt a sturdy hoof lay her gently back against the rocky terrain. 

"Woah now, It's gonna be okay, I ain't a doctor, but..." Applejack's words came out in a tired tone, yet reassuring, comforting in Pinkamena's distress. "...I can do the best I can to get you the help you need." 

Pinkamena felt a hoof cradle her head, as water met her dry cracked lips. She drank thankfully, before finding the strength to push the bottle away. Twilight and Fluttershy needed it more, she told herself. As she opened her eyes to meet Applejack's. Finding the farmpony had tied a bandanna around her nose and mouth, to aid against the ashen air. Clearly more prepared for this treacherous hike than Pinkamena had been. She had been so, so foolish. She tried to speak, but only coughed a bit more. Clearing her throat before finally speaking. 

"Thank you..." Pinkamena croaked. "Can you reach my bag for me?"

"Uh? Sure..." Applejack looked a little quizzically, but followed Pinkamena's instructions all the same. Reaching a hoof inside Pinkie's bag. Searching. "What am I looking for, exactl-"

"I coulda sworn..." Applejack looked surprised, before pulling out a small tank of compressed oxygen. 

Pinkamena smiled slightly, as Applejack recovered from her confusion, to realize what needed to be done. Administering some to Pinkamena, as she accepted the help reluctantly. She wanted to help the others first, but was patient enough to wait, as the fresh air breathed life back into her weary bones. Clearing the haze from her mind as she breathed deeply, before turning it off, and offering it to Applejack. Who offered a bandanna in return. 
Before moving on to Twilight. Moving quickly, every action confident as she checked for a pulse. Pinkamena admired her surety as Applejack resuscitated the unconscious unicorn. Splashing Twilight's face with a small wave of water, and pressing a hoof into her diaphragm. While forcing the compressed oxygen in once the dying smoke had been expelled a little from her lungs. 
Twilight coughed several times, feeling pain as she was ripped from death's merciful clutches. She wanted to scream, but only found a dying moan escape her, as fresh air intruded upon her dying peace. Her lungs betraying her desires, as they greedily hungered after the clean intake of her breaths. Darkness fading from her mind, as she felt life enter, unwelcome, once more into her body. She ached, but she would live. 

Why can't I just die? This would all be over then... Just let me sleep... Forever. 

Life was pain, and Twilight wished to bury her hurt along with her mind. She felt like screaming, crying, breaking down once and for all. Purposefully shatter her self-image into dust, and find rest only upon death's forgiveness. She opened her eyes to find her savior had already moved on to Fluttershy. Pinkamena gave her a bandanna, which she reluctantly used her magic to fasten to her muzzle. She wanted nothing more than to die up here. Be a forgotten sacrifice for the greater good, and all that Celestia forsaken fake facade entailed. Perhaps be remembered a hero, rather than the tragedy she truly had become. 
Applejack was taking unusually long to help Fluttershy, Twilight noted. Her attention perked in sudden attentiveness. Watching as the farmpony's hoof remained under Fluttershy's jaw. Searching, but not finding what she was looking for. Applejack had given a hesitant glance towards Twilight, and Pinkamena. It lasted less than a second, but it held so much in it's worried gaze. It felt haunting, and forced a shivering chill to slide up her spine. As Applejack hurriedly rolled the pegasi onto her back, and began the chest compressions. 
Pinkamena didn't waste a beat, taking the oxygen tank from Twilight's unaware hoof. Placing the mask over Fluttershy's muzzle, and adjusting her neck to allow the air to pass more easily to the lungs. Before beginning to adjust the oxygen in rhythmic intervals. Forcing a pattern of artificial breathing, as Applejack kept fighting to bring back a dormant pulse. Death had apparently chosen its favored soul.
Twilight found herself helplessly staring on. Wishing it could have been her dying, instead of the fragile kind pegasi. But life wasn't fair, Twilight was sure of it. She couldn't handle this, it wasn't fair for Fluttershy to die, and not her. 

How dare you! How dare you give her what I want, and not ME!... 

Twilight couldn't hear anything, the world had gone silent in her mind. As she fought the emotions inside her. Long dormant desires, clawing their way to the surface all at once. She was angry, above all else. She felt her emotions charge her magic, as she glared jealously bitter at Fluttershy's lifeless corpse. 

This is so UNFAIR!... 

"What are yo-?" Pinkamena tried to ask, but it was already to late. 

"CLEAR!" Twilight screamed as she shoved Applejack aside, and pressed her horn to Fluttershy's broken chest. Releasing the magical shock into Fluttershy's heart. 
Twilight waited, charging another blast, when she realized nothing had happened. She tried again and again, forcing more power into the shocks, as she continued to fail. She screamed in desperate frustration, readying another blast, as Fluttershy coughed and sputtered. Curling into a ball, as Pinkamena immediately administered more clean oxygen from the tank. To feed her gasping lungs.
Twilight managed to realize Fluttershy had responded, just moments before releasing the final charge. Lifting her head upwards and away from harming Fluttershy further, as she redirected the magic into the sky. Avoiding the weakened cowering pegasi, and the other ponies. As they watched the ignited sparks of violet tendrils strike through the ashen air. Dancing in their brief brilliance, as Twilight calmed the storm raging inside herself. Taking in deep breaths of filtered air through the cloth around her mouth. Seething, as she soothed her beating heart.  

Damn right! If I can't die, neither can you!... Fluttershy.....

Celestia damn it all....

Twilight thought to herself. Pleased in the outcome of their hard work. She continued to stare up, tears slowly sliding down her cheeks, as she glared into the sunless smoke filled sky. The euphoria filling her sadness, as she sobbed uncontrollably. Before being ripped away from her by the disrupted silence. 

"There, there..." A firm, yet gentle hoof embraced her, giving support to Twilight's swaying dizziness. 

So weak... pathetic... 

"You did good, Sugarcube... You did good..." Applejack affirmed her, as she lowered her gaze to Fluttershy who was being cared for by the sad, equally teary eyed, Pinkamena Diane Pie. They stayed there, letting the silence wash over them. Winona whined as she snuggled into the thoroughly shaken Fluttershy. No one wanted to shatter the grasp of silence, until Pinkamena found the confidence to break it. 

"We should turn back..." 

"I wasn't gonna say it, but you're probably right..." Applejack agreed with Pinkamena. "We should fall back, regroup. Make an actual plan, and then do it right..." 

"Mmhmm" Pinkamena agreed, defeated. As Fluttershy simply continued to cower. A mess of fear, and uncertainty. Twitching and yet rooted to where she lay, hugging Winona. Finding comfort in the loyal canine's playful panting.

"No!" Twilight burst, a bit shocked at her own opposing stance on the almost seemingly unanimous decision. The two mares looked surprised. 

"Why not?" 

"Beg your pardon?"

"Because..." Twilight didn't entirely know. She felt like falling back, perhaps getting somepony else to solve the problem. But she liked the odds of dying. It made her feel alive. "Because we're here, we can't wait another minute. Equestria is suffering, and... and..." 

"Twilight, I know you're not thinking clearly, but we should at least take Fluttershy to the hospital, make sure she's really fine. And get her back home..." Pinkamena argued, a sound reasoning to impose over Twilight's desperation.

"But... but-" Twilight tried to find a better argument. 

"Err, 'Twilight,' we should just head back. It would be careless to go on without being properly prepared." Applejack said her name as if it were foreign to her. Unfamiliar on her tongue, as she proposed her and Pinkie's decision further. It all seemed so final. Even if they were right, in the end. 

"Ugh! Fffffffiiine.... Fine..." Twilight stomped her hoof in agitation. "Why don't we have you, or Pinkie, take Fluttershy back. Make sure she's taken care of, and then you can meet me and whoever stays at the top of the mountain. How about tha-?"

A loud echoeous roar berated their ears, as flames flashed like thunder, through the clouds of smoke. The sound raged on, accompanied by several more flashes of fire. A crack of lightning ensued, blinding as the light cut through the smoke, silhouetting the eruption. As the battle cry ensued. The mountain started to shake under their hooves, as the band of doomed adventurers found themselves transfixed by the chaos. 

"What in tarnation?..." Applejack muttered, as an explosion erupted through the air. Followed swiftly by a harsh outcry as a streak of blue pallor separated the smokey haze. Hurtling through the air, as the pegasi tried to correct her flight. But failed spectacularly, finding herself planted in an explosion of rock and dust mere yards from the group. 
A dismal groan escaping Rainbow Dash's lips the only sign she wasn't completely killed on impact. Not that Twilight had any doubt, the dense hard head of hers was probably more protection than any helmet she could've had. Nothing could kill that stupid daredevil, Twilight smiled as she thought such. 
Only proven further, as the rainbow maned pegasi stood abruptly, shaking off the pain. Stretching a few limbs, finding what still worked, and inspecting herself for damages. Before finally noticing the miserable company she had. 

"RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!" A cry echoed off the rocks, as the sound of thundering panicked hooves drew near. Several dancing lights, and colorful magical explosions bombarding the mountainside. Flames chasing the fleeing unicorn, as Trixie burst through the smoke. Her hat and singed cape burning as she fled. Twilight almost burst into laughter, but another raging column of flame burst between Rainbow Dash and her companions. A little too close for comfort. 

"Rainbow, fly Fluttershy to the hospital. You're the fastest one here!" Twilight commanded, and Rainbow didn't argue. Understanding enough, to put differences aside, and simply obey. Zipping to Fluttershy's side, and picking her off the ground. Winona and all, before disappearing into the horizon. As everypony else, joined in following Trixie's chaotic lead. Disregarding any form of orderly procession, as they ran. Twilight slightly slower than the others, it was a good day to die, after all.

"... AND!... " Twilight outburst, catching an idea out of the crowded air. "Something should be done before all this ash causes a fire... Equestria is a ticking time bomb!" 

Twilight tried to put as much urgency into her argument, trying desperately to convince them. Or at least plant a seed of possible doubt, before being dragged back down the mountain. 

"Just imagine what that sort of wildfire would do to your orchard!" Twilight insisted, doubling down on trying to convince Applejack. Knowing that if she could, Pinkamena would most likely agree with whatever plan they'd negotiate.

"But we can't just bring Fluttershy nearer to the source of all this smoke... She nearly died for Celestia's sake!" The farmpony argued, pointing a hoof at the fragile pegasi. Who was still relishing in the fresh air provided by the slowly depleting tank. Twilight had to admit, Applejack had a point. 

"We need to turn back, going on would just be reckless." 

"But... But..." Twilight whined, grasping at anything. "Your orchard..." 

"The orchard has already gotten a weeks worth of ash dumped on it.. The apples unharvested are ruined... It'll take moons to recuperate regardless." Applejack rebutted bluntly. Trying to stifle a yawn at the mention of the destroyed crops, weary and exhausted.
It was then that Twilight realized how dazed Applejack seemed, the sleepless bags under the farmpony's eyes further proving Twilight's suspicions. Applejack was as much a hindrance as Fluttershy. 

"Fine...." Twilight exhaled defeat. "Fine! Let's go, I don't care! Applejack, you can carry Fluttershy for all I care!" 

Twilight didn't wait for a response, marching back through the ever piling ash. Back to the buried town. Not taking another second to look back, perhaps she'd come back alone tomorrow. Or simply bar the windows and doors, and hope the world ended in peace. 

I don't care. 

Twilight rehearsed the line for the hundredth time. Determined to meet Celestia's wrath with compliant defiance. She returned to awaiting. Yet the draining time was soul crushing, when accompanied by the burdens of crippling self deprecation. Perhaps she could whittle away, at the stone that was her own. Enough to sustain the hollowing grave, growing ever deeper inside her soul. Intoxicating her mind, the pain of slowly dying had been exhilarating. Twilight didn't want to feel the pain, but she did want to feel alive. 

Regardless of the cost of mild discomfort. 

Pain was just weakness after all...

Twilight found herself staring at the kitchen drawer, fixating upon it's intricate details. She was back in the library, not remembering how she'd gotten there. But she didn't care. Perhaps she'd walked the entire way, perhaps she'd just teleported and saved herself the grueling tedium of returning. 
Regardless, Twilight's heart sped up at the thoughts racing through her mind. The rush was livening. Maddeningly exhilarating in it's forbidden tabooed nature. Yet it pleased her, and brought a satisfying smile to her face. Twilight opened the drawer ever so quietly. As to not alert Spike or anypony else of her self treachery. She levitated the knife from its resting place, examining the long sharp blade. 
Expecting it with scrutiny, before determining it would suffice. Twilight retreated to the bathroom, to find solace in pain. To draw a bath, to wash away her sins. Twilight felt happy.
> Chapter 8: The Darkest Hour
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


The Darkest Hour



Twilight was filled with joy. 

She had found happiness once more...


The warmth of the bath was soothing, as she lay there releasing her anguish. Washing the blood on her hooves from past sins down the drain. As she watched the inky black tendrils slither from her open flesh. She had been careful enough to not inflict severe damage upon herself, but the pain burned. Filling her cold heart with strength once more. It was pleasing to the sting, as she let the darkness drain from her. How silly she had been when she'd started, timid and shy to the knife's gentle edge. Testing the cool blade with hesitation at first. Before relishing in it's forsaken freedom. 


What had she been afraid of? 



This was liberation to her dying soul, to assure herself that she was still alive.
 

Despite the darkness ebbing through her veins. She would let the warmth drain from her until the darkness was all gone. Or until it was all that remained. Twilight leaned against the frigid basin's walls, as she gazed lifeless up at the ceiling for what felt like an eternity. It felt so good, to live on the edge. Mere thoughts away from death's door, yet clinging to life like the insolent foal she was. Perhaps fate was a cruelty to tempt, but in this moment of hollow exaltation Twilight enjoyed her dominion. She was now in control, in this moment, free to the whims of her desires. 


Too bad this moment couldn't last forever...

Or maybe it could?.....



No....... 

No, this was enough... 







For now...








Twilight closed her eyes, she could feel the sting warring off, the numbness was returning. And she embraced it welcomingly. Slowly rising from the water, pulling the blockage from the drain. Watching as the murky mirth washed away. Leaving only the sting of numb cold regrets, as the frozen air wove itself around her body. 
Twilight swayed slightly, as she climbed from the tub. She felt tired, but managed to stave off the exhaustion eating at her insides, as she dried herself. Taking care to be gentle with the cuts on her forehooves, careful to not cause further bleeding. Twilight felt light headed, as she left the room, to find the night had come upon the town outside. She tiptoed her way drunkenly elated up the stairs to the bedroom. Leaning to the wall for support whenever her mind started to spin too quickly. Keeping to the shadows, to hide her secret transgression from being discovered. 
She lit her horn with a small glow, as she crept as quietly as she could to the closet. Finding a fresh sweater to wear, a dark grey, perhaps brown or black. She couldn't tell in the dim light. All she cared for was whether or not it would hide her pain from everypony else. Especially Spike. 


How hurt he would be, to uncover our secret misdemeanor... 

Oh, yes... What would Spike say if he uncovered our newfound hobby of carving our flesh?...

How disappointed he would be, indeed...


The thought taunted her mind, as she wished the voices could have been drained with her blood. Too bad the pain was all but a sedative to their incessant whining. Twilight knew it was wrong. In her logical mind hurting herself made no sense, but it had felt good. For the first time, something she did felt right. Even if it was so very, very wrong.
Twilight felt the nervous giddy wrapped around her at the thought of the cutting joy she'd experienced. Perhaps she would relish its liberation tomorrow, and the next day. On and on forever, until she died at the hands of Celestia's mercy. 


But that day won't come soon enough...


Twilight turned, relinquishing to the arms of sleep. As she stepped towards the bed in dizzy euphoria. Readily collapsing into it's-Twilight turned from the closet to find Pinkie Pie standing between her and the respite of her bed. The shadows of the moonlight cast upon her downcast emotions. Her hair flowing downwards in a chaotic mess of tangled deflation. That met the stained wooden floor with confetti teardrops that glittered in the moonlight. Yet Pinkamena's gaze was steadfast and steeled with determination. Sharply popping Twilight's languid calm like a party balloon of sudden surprise. 
Twilight visibly jumped out of her skin, flailing as she fell backwards over herself, at the unexpected intervention. Twilight winced with the delightful fresh pain, hugging her forehooves closer, as she lay curled on the floor. Soothing the fresh stings under cotton sleeves, as Pinkamena loomed over her. 

"Twilight, can we talk?" Her voice inquired in a low confrontational fringed frown. Commanding and direct. Nonnegotiable. 

"No," Twilight hissed, turning away from the faded pink party pony. 

"Leave me alone, it's late. And I don't want you to wake Spike..." Twilight made up an excuse on the fly, briefly dropping her gaze to the woven basket bed that lay beyond Pinkie. It was empty. The blanket torn away, gone with no telling of where the little dragon was. 

"What? Where?... Where's Spike?!" Twilight's voice was growing in volume, as her heart quickened, threatening to throw her mind into a panicked frenzy. 

"He's fine," Pinkie responded calmly, "I convinced him to go help Fluttershy with her scared animals. Since the doctor said she should take it easy for a few days... He'll be sleeping over there for tonight, and possibly for longer." 

"WHAT?! Why?!" Twilight exclaimed, pushing herself from the ground. To challenge Pinkamena's stature with her own. 

"Because, he doesn't deserve to see you like this..." Pinkie replied somberly, hitting Twilight's guard with a blunt collision of sound logic. It pained her heart, and made Twilight almost wish she hadn't left the knife so carelessly in the bathroom. So she could drive it into her aching heart, instead. Pinkie placed a hoof on her shoulder, trying to comfort her, but Twilight pushed it away in abstinent annoyance. 

"You need help, Twi-"

"No! No, I DON'T!" Twilight insisted threateningly. "I'm.... FINE."

"Twi-"

"Don't touch me," Twilight seethed, pushing Pinkie's embrace away, once more. She couldn't stand the tone in Pinkie's voice. She didn't want to be babied, she didn't want Pinkie's empathy. Twilight just wanted to be alone. She wanted to sleep, and sleep forever. Forget the world, and the world would forget her. Why couldn't she ever have what she wanted?

Who did Pinkie think she was, how could she possibly know anything? 

"Twi-" Pinkie tried to interject. With that pitiful remorse that Twilight wouldn't accept.

"GO AWAY!" Twilight finally screamed, letting every ounce of anger flow. Her gaze turning to a glare as Pinkamena lingered like an unwanted ghost. 

"I don't need HELP, especially not from YOU, I need SLEEP! It's LATE, and you're intruding on MY house, in MY room..." Twilight ranted, barring the fangs of hatred as she continued her tirade. Pinkie opened her mouth as if to say something, but Twilight wouldn't hear it. She had had enough of this Pinkamena's pity party. 

"I'm going to SLEEP, and you can't stop ME! I've had enough of YOU, and your silly stupid shenanigans. You've already dragged ME halfway up a BUCKING MOUNTAIN and back from CELESTIA knows where today! I JUST WANT A DAMN BREAK FROM YOU! Your BUCKING FANTASTIC failing attempts at 'Making things Right!' Just LEAVE ME ALONE, GET OUT OF MY HOUSE, AND LET ME HAVE MY TARTARUS FORSAKEN SLEEP!!!!!" Twilight seethed, glaring maniacally at Pinkie, who for her credit, stood her ground. Somehow managing not to cower and quake in fear. Yet flinched ever so slightly at every spatten word. Refusing to meet Twilight's fierce gaze. 

Twilight was going to get her to leave, even if she had to remove her by force. Twilight lit her horn, and saw immediate fear in Pinkie's eyes, but only for an instant. Twilight entrapped the pink mare in her grasp before Pinkie could escape, beginning to drag her towards the door, but the magic blinked from existence in an instant. Twilight was dumbfounded, before trying again. To equivalent amounts of success. 

"What?... Why... Why isn't my magic working?" Twilight stammered, fumbled over her words, as Pinkamena stood her ground. 

"Twilight," Pinkie's soft sugar was quickly melting, running like heated frosting dripping off an ice cream cone. Growing with increased sternness, and strength. Gritting through sugar coated teeth, the question managed to crawl its way once more from the horrid mare's mouth. "Can we talk?"

Twilight tried once more to cast her magic, but found it had eluded her before her thoughts had even formed. Heaving the deepest sigh she could resist, Twilight flung herself onto her bed. Picking up a pillow in her hooves, and screaming into it's bowels all manners of atrocities, that made her happy Spike weren't here to hear them. Hoping by the time she was done, the party pony would have left, and been long gone. Leaving her to her precious dreamless sleep. 
Twilight screamed, for as long as she could, until her voice cracked like glass. The silence that followed was welcoming, to Pinkie's gentle hoof that lifted the darkness of the pillow from Twilight's gaze. 

"You done?" Pinkie asked. 

"No..." Twilight managed to croak, and found her face kissed once more by the pillow's fluffy mass, as Pinkie dropped it into her face. Which managed to coax a coughed up laugh from the dreary pink pony. Despite Twilight's muffled surprise of indignation, having received a pillow to her face. 

"Well, whenever you are, I'll be waiting here..." Pinkie's voice chirped awkwardly, mixed like cake batter between the deadpan drawl and bouncing balloons of her past happiness. As the humorous bundle of joy from the past started to drip into Pinkie's depressive facade. As small giggles started to bubble like a brook beginning to flow after years of drought. 
Twilight lingered for a little while longer, taking in another breathe before rolling over, and allowing gravity to claim the pillow from her gaze. Lulling in her indolence before finally meeting Pinkie Pie's gaze. Defeated, she lay. Waiting for Pinkie to break the silence, first. 
Pinkie's silence sprouted in mixed emotions, perhaps anger at Twilight. Which she felt was justly deserved, perhaps speechless anguish at another pony's loss of a long dead smile. Brutally murdered by selfish desires. Or perhaps the optimistic dreamer, Pinkie Pie herself, was lost as to what to possibly say. 
Twilight could feel her patience growing thin at the crowded quiet looming between them like an awful gloom. She kept her anger at hoofs length with every additive weighty sigh she managed to summon from the bowels of her lungs. The constant reminder that she was still alive. 

Why couldn't I have just died on the mountain? Would've saved everyone the heartache...

Especially ME...

Twilight caught Pinkie's eyes starting to gather collective precipitation once more, and it stung her to know she was causing Pinkie pain. Even without doing anything, simply be living, no... Just existing, or having existed, was causing pain. Twilight wished for the hundredth time she had never existed, never been born. Perhaps then the world could go on. Perhaps then the world would be happier... Even if it were just one pony more, than the rest, that could have found their happy smile. 

"Twilight?" Pinkie's voice finally broke the silence, raw emotion simmering in the cracks of the word, as Twilight heaved another despairing sigh. 

"What, Pinkie?..." 

"Do you...?" Pinkie took a long pause, seeming to rethink the question. Or perhaps she felt she were walking on eggshells. Carefully calculating the best way to approach what a damnable lost cause of a pony Twilight had become. A mine field that with one wrong step, would send everything spiraling in a blast of futile destruction. Regardless, Pinkie seemed to be having an equivalently hard time finding the words to fill the darkness of the room as well. 
Twilight's gaze shifted to the window, finding the light of the spotless moon aggressive to the darkness. As it filtered through the ash stained window pane. That scattered shadows in the dimmed luster of it's undeserved beauty. Twilight felt the bed sway, as Pinkie climbed carefully onto the end of it. Before nestling beside Twilight, forehooves snaking slowly around her to form a tight embrace. As Twilight continued to stare off into space, lost completely in the moment. 
Until the warmth from Pinkie's squeezing hold, pounced upon her all at once. Having crept upon Twilight as she'd absentmindedly lay there. Actions spoke louder than any words Pinkie Pie could possibly have attempted to arrange, as Twilight felt her chest lurch. Sudden tears brimming her eyes, as she began to cry. Stiffing sobs, and pain. As Pinkie continued to listen to the unspoken words of Twilight's aching heart. 
Pinkie held on, until long after Twilight's remorse had bubbled it's way to the surface. Tear stained cheeks leading to a chilling calm in the nightly darkness. Twilight felt like she needed to speak her mind, yet she found her efforts futile. As she lay, embraced in the warmth of her unrelenting friend. Whose voice struck a chord in the hallow moonlight, that surprised Twilight as it resonated gently through the library. 

Was that a.... Lullaby? 

Twilight tried to protest such a childish thing, but Pinkie simply hushed her before continuing. Twilight did feel awfully tired, her eyes grew heavy with the calm. As Pinkie Pie ran a hoof through Twilight's mane, with a tender care that took her back to foalhood memories. A time of childish giddies, and motherly mercies. Happier times, in which she had once had ambitious dreams, a purpose in life, and a smile. Twilight stole a final breathe from the nighttime, before relinquishing herself to the jaws of sleep. Carried away by the soft fading tones of Pinkie's lofting smile. 


"Do you consider Us, friends?"















Deep in the woods of Everfree, trudged a stripe adorned, masked pony. 
Words she spoke but very few, as she prepared for what she would do. 
She had concocted a special brew, one in which she had seldom used. 
A potion of dragon sneeze tree leaf stew, 
upon which she knew, the smallest sniff would make the smoking beast return from whence it flew. 
Once the mare had crept into view, she aimed for the dragon before she threw. 
The flask of potion that splattered and spewed, as the zebra found her aim was true. 
Ducking for cover as the flames blew, changing in their agitated hue. 
As the dragon sneezed a hefty dew. 
The smoke was snuffed as the strong scent grew, and the dragon stumbled blindly into the foggy night as it took bumbling flight. With teary eyes it bothered not to say goodbye, as it flew far away from view. 
Back from whence no pony knew. 

> Lunar Epilogue 8
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


Lunar Epilogue 8:



She was not alone. 
She could feel It's presence, and for once It had come to Her. 
She had seized It from the shifting void, clung to It as It had resisted her grasp. 
The tendrils of darkness clinging to Her struggling to keep them apart. 
She would not let It go, screaming in excitement, despite the joyful agony. 
It burned, as the void was struck with a singular light.
The inklike tendrils retreating in the sudden luster of brilliance. 
It pained Her to gaze upon the light, as the tendrils slowly drained away, like inky water falling away. 
As She was pulled from the darkness.  
It lurched forward, It's orb like polish almost slipping from Her hooves, yet she managed to hug it tighter. 
As it dragged her closer to the light. 
The darkness fading away, until all was consumed by the incandescence. 





Even Her...
But She didn't care. 
She was finally free.





The first breath of life was the hardest, it caused pain. As She began to acclimate to her newfound existence. The noise was deafening in it's silence, as she lay on the cold smooth platform beneath her. She ran a hoof curiously over it's rough polish, and then discovered that she in fact had hooves. She screamed with terrified jubilation, as She had struggled to stand, to cower or run. To simply do anything, as she flailed about like a newborn calf. Before collapsing exhausted to the hard smooth floor. Staring up into a sky full of lights, mixed with the brighter darkness. A mockery of her abyssal home, but at least comforting to her weary gaze. As she fixed her eyes upon the largest orb that hung in the night sky. Of which shone it's pure white hue mercilessly in return. It was a curiosity to her, and despite the pain in her gaze, she found it's glow soothing. Perhaps even, beautiful. 
She tried to stand again, struggling to fully rise, before suddenly feeling weightless. As gravity vanished altogether. Confusion struck Her, as she began to float away like an untethered balloon. She flailed her forehooves reaching for something, anything. Before being rocketed into the sky. Rolling in all manner of directions, spiraling in chaotic control, as she cried out in newfound terror. Another brilliant flash, and She was gone. 





She opened her eyes, to find herself seated at a large round table. Finely set with cups with slowly steaming contents. She stared down to find a cup set before her own seat, and she studied it curiously. Delicately nudging it with her hoof, trying to figure out how to pick up such a strangely shaped object. 

"More tea Angel bunny?" The voice surprised, Her as she cast her eyes around the table of stuffed animals. Before finding Her hostess. A merry pale yellow pegasi, who proceeded to pour more liquid from a pot into a cup settled in front of a bunny doll. One of it's black button eyes popped out of place comically, and the pegasi hastily set down the teapot to catch the button. 

"Oh my..." The pony muttered, before placing the eye back to the bunny's face. Where it magically stuck. Satisfied the pegasi cheerily went back to serving tea to any other empty cups. 

"More tea?-" A loud gasping scream caught in the pony's throat, as she turned to find her recently added guest. Hooves clutching the teapot tightly, as the pegasi's mouth opened and closed in soundless gapes. Like a fish out of water, finding it hard to breath. Finally managing to stutter, 
"N-n-nightm-m-mare... M-moon?...." 

The silence to follow was breathtaking, as She glanced nervously about, wondering what could possibly have struck fear into the poor pegasus. She clasped her cup in both hooves, and lifted it to her lips. Taking an awkward slurp from it, before meeting the stone faced shock of the pony. Wide eyed like a deer caught in headlights, her gaze had never left Her. 
Realization dawned on Her, as She fumbled to lower the teacup. Bumbling desperately as it bounced aloft for a moment, before clattering to the plate and spilling across the table. 
The pegasi jumped away, like being struck by lightning, as she cowered away from Her. She glanced about at the stuffed animals, nervously curious as to why She had caused such a visceral reaction. Despite being lost in the foreign world around Her. She should've been the one cowering, not this pegasus pony. 
She was about to apologize for spilling the tea, when an uproar exploded from her right. She jumped in fear, as the teddy-bear warped and bubbled, growing larger in size. Before swiping a paw at Her. She ducked in exclamation, as She fell backwards in her chair. Rolling across the floor away from the immediate danger. Retreating to the wall, as the hulking form of plushie pudge continued it's approach. The pegasi was cowering behind the table at this point, eyes closed in fear. As the bear defended it's mistress. 
She glanced around Her looking for any path to flee, as the stuffed animal came bearing down. She ran for what looked like a door, screaming all the way. Fumbling for a way to open it, but nothing She tried worked. This seemed to have caught the yellow pegasus by surprise, as she was cautiously watching from her hiding spot. As the bear wrapped Her in it's arms, despite Her outcries of dismay, and flailing attempts to free herself. Before finally submitting to Her defeat, weighed down by the massive bulk of a crushing cushion of fluff.
Her screams for help muffled under it's overbearing mass. Until it lifted Her in it's clutches, and carried Her back to the table, to a now. Slightly curiously inquisitive caring pegasi. She was sat back in Her seat, while the pegasi righted the teacup in front of Her. From where She'd spilled it, and proceeded to fill it halfway with freshly steaming contents. 

"More tea, miss *ahem*.... Nightmare Moon?" The uncertainty in the question implied more than just asking if She wanted more than half the cup filled. 

"Uuuuh, s-sure..." She replied hesitantly, shifting in Her seat. As the pegasi filled the cup completely, with slightly wavering hooves. The question started to boil in Her mind, however. As She watched the tea being poured. 

"W-who is 'Nightmare Moon?" As She spoke Her mind, the pouring stopped, as the pegasi studied Her for any sign of fake ignorance. Yet seemed to find genuine innocence in Her inquiry. 

"Uhhhhmmm," The pegasus seemed as if she wasn't sure how to respond. Glancing about awkwardly, but eventually settled for answering with her own inquiry. "Are you not her?"

She didn't know how to respond. She didn't know whether or not She was this 'Nightmare Moon.' What if She was? Judging by the panicked reaction from the Pegasus earlier, perhaps it wouldn't be a good thing. Concern wrote itself in Her face, as She stared downward at the cup of tea. Searching for answers that didn't come. 

"Well, if you're not Nightmare Moon, then... W-who are you?" The pegasi eventually asked.

"Uh..." Her mind was trying to think of anything to answer, moving at a hundred miles a minute. Deciding to try to make an answer, if She couldn't remember it. "S-s-spang..."

"Spang?" The pegasus' eyebrow rose in curiosity. 

She wanted to facehoof herself for Her stupidity, for blurting out random nonsense. What had She been thinking? But She didn't want to correct herself and look stupid. Or worse, suspicious for not having a name. So, She doubled down, and went along with it. 

"Yeah, Spang..... Shortened for 'Spang...-le Bright'.... I'm just a little nervous, sorry...." She apologized, running a blackened hoof through Her wavy blue mane. 

"Right...... Spangle Bright..." Her hostess replied, a bit uncertain it seemed, over the authenticity of the name. But shrugged it off, and proceeded to pick up her own cup and saucer to enjoy the tea. 

"Well, my name is Fluttershy, and it's nice to meet you Spang" Fluttershy replied cheerful once more. Taking a sip of the still steaming tea. 

"Uh, yeah.... Nice of you to... uhm.... the tea?" Spang replied trying to pick up her own cup with clumsy mimicry of Fluttershy's effortless motions. Glancing about nervously to have found the teddy-bear had returned to it's original size. Seated at her right, as if nothing had ever happened. No longer a nightmare. Everything was peaceful as it should be. 
Lost in the world of Dreams.
> Chapter 9: Darkness
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


Darkness


Twilight awoke to the sudden realization of danger, her heart began to pound forewarning. As she found herself in a dimly lit room, no windows or doors. Or perhaps she was just facing away from any entrance. She lifted her head, as a mild epiphany of pain pulsed through her skull. Aching as she came to the understanding that she was sitting in a chair. Twilight tried to stand, but found herself restrained beyond her recollection. 
Immediate laughter rang through the walls, a mockery of joy. As Twilight turned her gaze to find the source of the uncanny mirth. The spotlight casting a perfect circle of light around her making it hard to see very far into the darkness. The laughter echoed off the shadows, and seemed to bounce around like popped party balloons. Twilight's eyes adjusted to find streamers hanging from the unfinished ceiling above. Dripping with entrails and blackened blood that dripped from far above. Staining the stone foundation with their scarlet teardrops. The single light hanging like a cadaver, was assaulting and bright to her gaze. As she felt the frantic alarms pulsing through her heartbeat, as she felt the pain settle in once more. 
Metal clanged abrasively against the stone floor, the sound accompanied by the harsh squishy crackle of bones, as Twilight's gaze immediately found what she feared. In the darkness, the hunched form of a pony slowly crept into view, as Pinkamena stared with lifeless eyes. Witness to the murder scene hiding in the deep, as the smell hit Twilight with a sickening brunt. More and more body parts of disassembled ponies haunted her vision. As Twilight's eyes adjusted to the dark. Pinkamena stood, mouth agape, in a facade of jubilee. As the disembodied laughter echoed all around. Growing in volume, as it attacked Twilight's ears with its mockery. Before being cut into a single whisper. 

"Are we not, Friends?"

Twilight was terrified, but managed to find her voice. "W-what?"

"Are We Not, Friends?"

The question repeated, and Twilight's mind was racing for an answer. This couldn't possibly be real, right? Twilight wanted nothing more than to assure herself of such, but her struggling for truth was wasted. Fruitless in any amount of mental endeavor, as she struggled against steadfast chains. The thing stared, wearing the decaying skin of the party pony, yet it could not hide it's perversion of happiness from Twilight's terror. The slack jaw swung on broken hinges, as if trying to speak. Its aimless tongue writhing in uncoordinated degradation, as inky black tendrils started to seep from those lifeless eyes. Those haunting eyes, that saw without seeing, captivating Twilight's gaze in their prison. As she could not escape. 

"Are We Not, Friends?"

The inky blackness melted to the floor, before slowly creeping closer to Twilight. Frantically she tried to push the chair away, but to no avail. As the tendrils reached out, wrapping themselves around Twilight. As she stammered, to speak her dismay. Until all that she could do more was scream. All the while the question repeated, caught on an endless loop of torment. 

"Are We Not, Friends?"

Twilight lurched, arching her back in strain. Trying to free herself, as she screamed louder. Longer than she'd ever screamed, determined to continue until her lungs burst if necessary. Tears of desperation streamed down to meet the darkness, as it slowly engulfed her. Choking her voice, as they wrapped around her throat. Twilight jerked, struggling to break free. As the tendrils began to crawl into her open mouth, caught in frozen terror, choking her in frigid fear while slithering down her throat. As all faded once more to black. 


Are... We... Not... Friends?






Twilight awoke in spastic pain, as she gasped for air. Frantically casting her eyes around, as beads of sweat dripped from her exhausted fur. She took a few rapid breaths in the silence. Before coming to realize she was back in her own bed. She glanced around to the comfort of her books, and the sunlight shining through the open window. Warding off whatever darkness her mind had conjured with its warming glow. As the realization washed over her tense body. Aiding to give it slivers of relief. 

It was just a dream...

Just a... Dream. 

Her mind laughed, with a haunting chill that forced a shiver from her shoulders. As Twilight glanced about in the hopes of finding Spike, or somepony to share the freezing solace with. But found the room vacant of any living souls. She raised a hoof to nurse a growing pain in her head, to find her forehooves were thickly bandaged. Snugly wrapped with caring white swathes, beneath the sleeves of her dark blue sweater. The gesture made a smile tug at her frown, as she rolled her eyes at what Pinkie had done. 

I guess there ain't no hiding secrets from that one...

She mused with her thoughts, finding it a blessed curse to her ill mind. She let out a sigh, rolling to the other side of the bed. Finding it's fresh frigid sheets welcoming to her slightly steaming cheeks. As she wondered as to where the pink pony had vanished. Had it all been a dream? Twilight silently hoped not, she wished to have somepony care for her. When she couldn't even find it in herself to do so. 
She lost herself in thoughts of the unexplained mystery that was Pinkie Pie, and how it tempted her with its mercy. Even as the smell of seasoned pumpkin and spice tingled her nose. As she tried to dream of a happier future, rather than the dark halls of a dungeon, or wasted land of an outcast's exile. 
A gentle knock at the door made Twilight rise with startled excitement. As she turned to find the pink mare wheeling in a trolley laden high with pumpkin pancakes, and ice cream cupcakes. Twilight momentarily wondered how the once again bubbling party pony had wheeled it up the curving flight of stairs. And more over how she hadn't heard it coming. Yet another piece of mystery to the puzzle of Pinkie Pie. For now she was willing to accept the good misfortune of getting her wish. She was not completely alone.
Twilight felt a sickening giddy in her stomach, at the sight of the haphazardly happy party pony. An ethereal aching that made her want nothing more than to drive an edge into herself. Dissecting the illness from her body by force, and expel all manner of rich ruby jubilation all across the bedding and floor of her room. And yet, the pain that caused her to shake, and eyes to fill with raindrops. Made the euphoria rushing through her cheeks, burn with passion. 

I'm just reacting to the embarrassment of crying...

Twilight lied to herself. Pushing the ember of unwanted possibility from her mind. Suddenly flinching at the reminder of her dream. The haunting smile and vacant eyes, that haunted the mirrors of Twilight's reality. Making it hard for her to search them for any sign of herself. She couldn't face it. Instead focusing on the plate of generous pancakes that Pinkie offered her with a gruesome gleeful smile. 

"Rough dream?" Pinkie asked, carefully. Causing Twilight to merely grumble an acknowledgement, as she rubbed her tired eyes. No longer enjoying the brilliant sun shining through the window. 

Sunshine?.... 

Twilight turned to the window. Staring out into the clear brilliance, until her eyes adjusted. Finding the azure sky shining with faded tragedy. At dark clouds drifting lazily away with the wind. Thinning beyond the lands of Equestria. Twilight stammered for words, for inquiry, for an explanation. Trying to organize her thoughts of what possibly could have caused such salvation. 

"Sunshine...." She managed, staring out into the gathering daylight. 

"Oh, right..." Pinkie sadly smiled at the remark. As understanding filled the quiet. "The smoke is gone, and from what I can tell... So is the dragon." 

"What, really?" Twilight asked in disbelief. "How?" 

"I dunno...." Pinkie shrugged, devouring a cupcake in mild dissatisfaction. 

"So, our entire efforts were worthless? A complete waste of time and effort?..." Twilight demanded, a bit exasperated and annoyed at the thought.

"Well, I wouldn't say they were worthless..." Pinkie flinched at the bitter words on her tongue. 

"It's more like it was, unnecessary... I tried to do what I thought was best, but..." Pinkie's eyes wavered in their watery gaze, as water welled in them. "I just made things worse... For the story, for the solution I thought I could control... But when it came down to it, I... I couldn't..."
Pinkie's bubbling burst, and she quickly shoved another cupcake into her mouth to stifle the sobs. As Twilight watched her with uncertainty. Hesitantly patting Pinkie in return, before being squeezed in yet another impossibly tight embrace. 

"Alright.... That's -enough..." Twilight gasped, prying Pinkie's hold loose enough to push free. "Thanks for the pancakes."
She said gratefully, as the moment between them passed. The tension falling back to an equilibrium within the quiet of the library. As Twilight began to nibble away at her portion of breakfast. The rest of the meal passed, uninterrupted as Pinkie sedated her own sorrows with more sugar. Twilight found her own hunger pained, as her thoughts drifted to darker depths. 

"So... Don't you have to go to work at the bakery soon?.. Or something..." Twilight asked with forbidden hope, finally breaking the silence. Pinkie didn't respond, she didn't bounce from the bed, or rush for the door. She simply lay there, taking a long breath in before letting it out slowly. 

"No..."

"No?!"

"I called today in, and said I needed a day off..." Pinkie slouched, looking at the far wall in her glum. "The Cake's were pretty understanding..." 

"Oh..." Twilight said nonchalantly, finding a few choice words she let bounce around insider her mind. "So, you're going to stay here and babysit me then?" Twilight asked, not caring to mention the reason for such. 

"Nope!" Pinkie giggled, as she lazily put a hoof to Twilight's nose. Causing Twilight to blink in disdained surprise, only causing the pink party pony to laugh harder in response. Until she was snorting, which coaxed a few polite giggles from Twilight as well. As she joined in such a prospect of joy. Pinkie eventually calmed down enough to stammer her suggestion as she hugged her stomach in pain. 

"I was gonna take you to visit Fluttershy, and see how Spike's doing with her animals. Get some fresh air, and maybe help out if it's needed." 

"I'd rather die..." Twilight rolled her eyes in dismay. Blunt, honest, and to the point with her short lived contempt. 

"Oh, you lovable lamenting loaf, you." Pinkie booped Twilight once more, playfully. Before bouncing off the bed, and gathering up the leftovers of breakfast in a hurry. Before jumping on the trolley, and rolling towards the stairs. Disappearing in a chaotic hailstorm, as she tumbled out of sight. In a swirling blur of dishes and pancakes collapsing to the floor... 
Multiple times... 
Before hitting the bottom...

"Be ready in 5 minutes!" Pinkie's voice called, as the cacophony quieted. And Twilight let out a sigh she had been holding. As she raised a hoof to her face. She didn't want to, but did she even have a choice? 

No..... No, of course not...





Twilight trudged along, dragging her hooves through the ash, as she followed Pinkie's bouncing steps, reluctantly. The streets were mostly deserted, no doubt thanks to the still bountiful ash heaps. Lining the pathway like unwelcome lingering snow on a fine sunny day. No pony seemed to be out. The doors shut, and curtains drawn, as the two passed on seemingly unnoticed through the town. If it weren't for the ash in need of removal, it would've felt like a ghost town, but Twilight understood the townsfolk's reluctance to deal with such a task. Twilight watched the ground, following the empty hoofprints Pinkie's bouncing glee left in the sandy soot. As Twilight allowed her mind to drift, letting the sound of crunching crackling under their hooves to carry her thoughts elsewhere. 
Twilight was pretty sure they weren't taking the most direct route, from the library to Fluttershy's cottage. But she figured if she asked, Pinkie would say something generically optimistic. Like telling her to stop and smell the roses. When there clearly were none in sight for miles, and all Twilight could smell was the fresh aftertaste of bitter smog. Despite the fresh chill in the breeze. 
Twilight merely trudged on in the grainy sand, as Pinkie bounced about with more energy than she should have been capable of. Smiling with such selfless cheer, it made Twilight grimace in envy of such capacities of happiness. It made Twilight wonder if she were to slice her open, if joy itself would come pouring out to quench her soul's drought of it. The thought was utterly ridiculous, Twilight knew for a fact, but it gave her enough courage to meet Pinkie's sickening smile with her own. 
The winding path through backstreets, finally wound themselves arriving at Fluttershy's cluttered home. To find a familiar Rainbow Dash, grumbling as she was in the bouts of shoveling piles of ash. Clearing the paths and walkways, as well as the burrows of various grumpy snakes and critters. As Fluttershy tried to help, despite Rainbow's insistence on not needing her assistance.

"I can't do this..." Twilight heard Pinkie mutter under her breath. She lifted her gaze, to inspect the solemn party pony's hesitancy next to her. Feeling a twinge of annoyance at the failing fortitude. She wanted to lash out in the sudden flow of anger, but settled for itching her scarred flesh. Biting back her unpleasant short fuse, with the fresh stings of warmth. 

Are you kidding me?!...

"Hey..." Twilight tried, to find any sliver of empathy to offer. Unable to find it in herself to cheer the party pooper, but rather decided to take karma's generous offer, in the irony of twisting fate. "You dragged me across Ponyville, you're not getting out of this that easily." 

"But, I-" Pinkie tried to protest, but Twilight was already dragging her with her magic. Despite Pinkie's hooves digging into the ground in dismay. Her reluctance melting to acceptance as Twilight dragged her along. Until they finally crossed the wooden arched bridge overlooking the dismally polluted pond's brook. 

"Hey, Fluttershy..." Twilight broke the scene, waltzing the pathway, before plopping the gutless Pinkie Pie beside her. "... Rainbow Dash. Nice day we're having." 

"Speak for yourself..." Rainbow Dash grunted in annoyance of Twilight's cheerful veneer. 

"Oh, hello Twilight... Pinkie Pie." Fluttershy greeted them welcoming to the two interlopers. 

"Hiya, we came to help out, and I can see you could use a lot of help. I'll go start clearing some of the ash in the back... Catch up with you later!" Pinkie was bursting with nerves, as she sped past Fluttershy in a whirlwind of action. Suddenly leaving Twilight to carry on any semblance of conversation of explanation. 

"Sorry, about Pinkie..." Twilight sighed, "I -um... Could I help you back inside? Maybe help you with anything you need done in the kitchen?" 

"Oh, I... I don't really want to be a burden..." Fluttershy tried to lie. Stifling a cough, as wind swept some ash from the heaps back into the air. 

"You, really don't have to be out here..." Twilight tried bumbling through her thoughts, trying to play the part of caring.

"That's what I've been trying to tell her!" Rainbow Dash interrupted, moving on to brushing ash off the birdhouses. Aggravated and clearly frustrated by Fluttershy's stubborn hospitality. "But she won't listen!"

"I see..." Twilight fought a habitual eye roll, at Fluttershy's lack of self care. It brought a smile of perverse understanding. "Why don't we go inside, and make Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie Pie..... Some lunch?" 

"Lunch?" Fluttershy seemed surprised, looking about suddenly wayward and lost. "Is it really almost that time of day?"

"Probably not... But we should get it ready for when it is." Twilight prompted, giving the overbearingly kind pegasi enough of a motivation to be helpful.

"Oh, well.... If Rainbow and Pinkie don't mind me not helping them..." 

"Just go already! I can handle this." Rainbow Dash insisted. 

"And Pinkie Pie?...." Fluttershy began.

"I'm sure she'll be super extra hungry.... After doing whatever she's doing..." Twilight reassured her. Beginning to walk towards the cottage door. Fluttershy seemed hesitant, but decided to follow.

"So....." Twilight began, as they entered the cottage and made their way through the packed living room of refuged creatures, towards the kitchen. "Any preference as to what to make for lunch? Sandwiches, salad, soup?..." 

"Oh, I don't know...." Fluttershy began, continuing her unobtrusive neutrality. Too afraid to even suggest what she would want, lest Celestia forbid, it offend any of her 'friends.' Twilight's annoyance was caught in the sight of a set of knives. So well kept, and glistening in their hold. The sight was sharply enticing, as Twilight reached out with her magic to draw the beautiful blade for inspection. It brought a selfish smile to her face.

"Uhm... Twilight?" Fluttershy's voice came in hesitation. Twilight caught her tainted reflection in the blade's edge, and whirled on Fluttershy. Perhaps a bit too quick, as Fluttershy flinched like the coward she was. The pegasi gulping down her unnerve filled frightened inquiry, . "Is anything... wrong?...."

"Oh, nothing's wrong...." Twilight was swift to respond, slightly embarrassed at the threatening demeanor she had scared Fluttershy with, in a moment of weakness. 

"I've just decided on what we'll make. How does vegetable and noodle soup sound?" Twilight said, as cheerfully as she could. Faking her best smile and bubbly personality, as she impaled the knife upon a cutting board. 

"J-just, lovely..." Was all Fluttershy managed to say. As Twilight directed her to fill the pot with water. While she began levitating some fresh vegetables to the counter, in preparation of cutting. The rest of the meal's preparation went on in silence. Save for the noise of the flawless blade, slicing its perfect edge through the crunching of potatoes, and various other veggies. Twilight did her best, to hide the eager smile, at the sedative thought of the repetitive task being used to bring her forbidden joy. 

All it would take.... A simple slip up... A moment of distraction.... That's all it would take....

Twilight almost felt she had the lungs for laughter at the thought. As she drove the knife deep into a rich juicy tomato. It's faint scarlet juice spilling across the wooden cutting board, as Twilight willed her imagination to almost believe it were blood. 

Just a simple.... slip of the blade.... 

Twilight drove the knife deeper still. Her hunger for pain, the only thing rushing through her bloody ears. 

Just a simple...

"Ow!"

The breathless exclamation snapped Twilight out of her silence, as red velvet ran across yellow fur. Twilight dropped the knife, as resentment boiled her insides. Not at Fluttershy, who's blood now painted droplets across the cutting board, but at herself for being so selfishly unaware, of Fluttershy's reaching for the diced vegetables. 

"No... No, no, no, no, no...." Twilight whined, breathless, at the sight. Her body shaken with the realization of how carelessly cursed she truly was. It made her want to drive that knife down her throat, and tear out every last pit in her stomach. As Fluttershy gingerly retracted her hoof protectively, while applying pressure to the wound gingerly. 

"I am so, so, so sorry...." Twilight pleaded, guiding Fluttershy to the sink, to wash and dress the wound properly. As she searched the cupboards with her magic for some bandages.

No you're not... You don't really care...

"Yes, I do..." Twilight breathed, barely above a whisper.

"What?"

"Nothing... I found some bandaids, let's clean the cut first." Twilight directed, as she turned on some cool water. Helping Fluttershy's shaking form, rinse the sin away. As Twilight sanitized the scratch, Fluttershy flinched in pain, but relinquished her desire to hide from its discomfort. Twilight smiled, perhaps reassuringly, but inwardly. It was just a bandaid to cover and hide her inner glee, at the small inklings of infection purged from the pure pegasus pony. 

As it should be... pure, and free from my taint.... 

From me.... 

Twilight used a kitchen towel hanging nearby, to dry the cleaned cut, and proceeded to bandage the small cut. It wasn't very deep, thankfully, but it had bled a ton for it's small slit of a slip. Twilight dug the torment into herself further, at her laps in control. As she helped Fluttershy, with misshapen steps, to her couch. Gently laying her to rest, despite the kind pegasi's resistance. 

"I.... I can still help!"

"Don't worry, we were just gonna throw in the last bit of carrots, and then wait for it to cook anyway..." Twilight comforted the stressed Fluttershy, from worrying further. Practically doing the rest of the tasks with her magic while she spoke. 

"See, nothing to worry about." 

"Oh, but I..... Ok...." Fluttershy conceded. Taking her rest on the couch, as concerned animals gently gathered closer to provide their caretaker with deserved comfort. Twilight left her there, as she returned to the kitchen to rinse the blood from the cutting board, and knife. Pausing as she found herself alone, once more. 

It's almost perfect..... 

Too perfect.... 

Twilight stared at her reflection as her gaze fixated upon the knife's blade. Reflecting her sinful desires, and pleasure in it's faulty facade. As it cut through her mask, revealing the truth broken and scattered beneath. Twilight let the shredded swaths fall away, revealing scarred flesh beneath. The knife levitated above her skin, as she stood over the kitchen sink. Mere moments away from satisfying the craving inside her. Of self hate, and stored away resentments. Time seemed to still, the world holding its breath, as Twilight hesitated. 
A gasp of shock cut its way into Twilight's ears. It rang sharply in the solace as water began to boil in the room's climbing tension. Twilight turned to find Fluttershy had been creeping back to the kitchen, no doubt to offer further help, only to discover Twilight's taboo. 

"I.... I.... I...." Fluttershy began to stammer, unsure of what to do. Uncertain of what she had become witness to.

A familiar voice echoed from deeper in the home, possibly from upstairs. Calling for Fluttershy's attention, no doubt to offer further help. As Spike's footsteps approached. Falling down stair steps rapidly, as his clawed footfalls matched the rhythm of Twilight's beating fragile heart.
Twilight was frozen with absolute putrid revolt at Fluttershy's discovery, and the possibility of Spike finding her in her lies. It was bad enough that Pinkie had found her like this, and to burden such a pure mind as Fluttershy's, or even Spike's, inflicted lacerations to Twilight's crumbling crippled heart. Magic gleamed, bursting to life, as Twilight did the only thing she could think to do. Run away from confrontation. As Spike began to round the corner of the kitchen, Twilight blinked out of existence. Leaving a gaping Fluttershy in her confusion, and her dragon helper to turn off the rushing water of her kitchen's sink. Fluttershy's finest knife, however, was gone.