It was a Sunday, and Wilson was... most likely blackout drunk or in a coma due to Ace's birthday party on Saturday. "Wilson, are you alive?" Fluttershy asked opening his bedroom door.
"...I think so," Wilson said with his head slammed into a pillow.
"Wilson I'm a little concerned for you," Fluttershy said walking up to him.
"Oh no... what now?" Wilson asked still talking into his pillow.
"Well it's just that I was reading your diary..."
"I'm going to stop you right there," Wilson said springing to life. "You were reading... my diary..."
"...Yes," Fluttershy said opening Wilson's diary. "And just look at how aweful your spelling is."
Deer Dairy
Today, me and Ender decaded to go screw around in the Everfee fortress. We found some pokerdoted mushroms and they were some good shit. Anyways... when I went home, Flutershy was all concernd about my helth because I was all green and throwing up. She worrys to much you no. So after a trip to the hospitle, and getting my stomach pumpd, I was crying on my couch for the ress of the day. Flutershy then boght me a sqeeke toy and I felt like I was nothing more then a dog. A dog laying on a couch and crying... it was kindof awesum I guess. Awesum like Flutershy. If it wasnt for her... I might of ben dead for a long time. Other ponis say that were dating butt I think thats just to anoy me. We are cleerly just two frends who live in the same house, hang out alot, protect eachother, hug alot, and on ocasion say that we love eachother. What the hell does that have to do with dating? Maybe there just high... oh wells. I guess I will end the entree here, see you later.
Sinsirly: Wilson
P.S. I also had this wierd dream that I walked in on Flutershy deeptroutin a dildo. She screemed and threw something at me, it hit me in the head an I woke up. I told Flutershy about the dream and she told me not to mention it to anyone or ever bring it up again... EVER. I guess having a dream like that could be embearassing if you told someone and left out the "so i had a dream that" part of the story. Oh wells... bye.
Studying the diary, Wilson then said, "I don't see anything wrong with it."
Fluttershy facehoofed and said, "This is why I signed you up for school."
"You did what?" Wilson shouted. "Why the hell would you do that?"
"Because your spelling sucks."
"I'm not going," Wilson said going back to bed.
"Well that's to bad, because it starts tomorrow."
In shock, Wilson screamed, "Nooooo! How could this happen to me? I've made my mistakes. Got nowhere to run..."
"Please stop singing."
"This is going to suck so much ass," Wilson said in complete depression.
"Are you sure you have everything?" Fluttershy asked.
"Yes..."
"Are you sure you don't want me to show you the way?"
"I'm a grown colt, I know the way," Wilson said in a whiny five-year-old voice. He then stomped his was out of the house. Realizing he had no clue where the hell he was going... he headed back and said, "Ugh... which way am I going?"
*One walking scene I was to lazy to write later*
"Okay, we are here," Fluttershy said as the two stopped walking.
"Fluttershy I can't go to school," Wilson said.
"Why not?"
"I... have diabetese."
"Not an excuse."
"I have a store to watch."
"Not an excuse."
"Damn it."
"Have a great first day," Fluttershy said kissing his cheek.
"Fluttershy, your embarrassing me in front of everyone!" Wilson yelled sounding like a five-year-old.
"Quit screwing around, or you will miss your first day," Fluttershy said walking away.
"Miss it like your period," Wilson wispered to himself as he walked to the school.
When Wilson entered the building and saw who the teacher was, he had a huge smile. Ms. Cheerilee turned around, noticed Wilson and screamed, "Noooo!"
"Cheerilee!" Wilson shouted walking in. "I thought I was never going to be in your class again."
"When I saw the name Wilson appear on the sheet," Ms. Cheerilee said with a tear down her eye. "All night I prayed that it wasn't going to be you. You made my job a nightmare."
"Yeah you can blame Fluttershy for signing me up."
Hitting her face against her desk, Ms. Cheerilee said, "Just... take a seat."
"Okay..."
Ms. Cheerilee stood up and said, "I want everypony to sign the attendance sheet, and say a little bit about your family."
One by one the young ponies signed the sheet, stood up, and said something. Then it came to Wilson, he stood up and said, "Hi my name is Wilson. There isn't much I can say about my family other then my dad was killed and my mom is a whore."
"Wilson!" Cheerilee shouted.
"What?"
"Language."
"Sorry... My dad died and my mom is a whore," Wilson said
"I was talking about the mom part."
"Whats wrong with the mom part?"
"The W-word."
"Whore?"
"Yes that."
"Whats wrong with the word whore?"
"Just sit down," Cheerilee said facehoofing herself as hard as possible.
"Whore," Wilson wispered to himself as he sat down.
"What did you say?" Cheerilee shouted.
"I said school is a chore," Wilson quickly came up with.
The rest of the class signed the sheet and said something. Cheerilee then said, "Okay now I would like for all of you to pair up into groups of four, we are going to do a project.
"It's only the first day!" Wilson shouted.
"Shut up..."
Wilson went into a group with the CMC. The three were a little confused about Wilson, so Scootaloo asked, "Why are you here?"
"What do you mean," Wilson asked.
"You are like twenty years older then everypony else in this class, why are you here?" Scootaloo said in confusion.
"Because Fluttershy hates me," Wilson said. "But to be honest, there is nothing in school that I could learn, that I couldn't from watching TV."
"You could learn how to spell," Cheerilee said.
"My spelling is just fine."
"You spelled your name wrong."
"No I didn't."
"It says Willsun insted of Wilson."
"...Okay so maybe I do need to go to school," Wilson said. He could hear two fillies to the right of him giggling, who turned out to be Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon.
"This colt is an idiot," Silver Spoon said. "Being his age, still in school, he will never make it in life."
"I know," Diamond said. "I'm suprised he isn't a blank flank." The two then continued to laugh.
"I can tell you two are going to be a problem, so..." Wilson said. He gave them The Stare and in a demonic vioce, he said, "Make another insult at me, and I will find you. You can run, but I will find you. You can hide, but I... will find you."
Scotaloo wispered to Sweetie Bell and Applebloom saying, "That was awesome."
"Okay class," Cheerilee said. "Now the project I want you to work on is a functioning catapult. It can be made out of any material, can be any size, any color, just as long as it works. This project will take a week to finish, and will take up all of your class time. You can work together outside of class if you want to, but a week should be more then enough time to finish."
"Done," Wilson said having a catapult next to him.
"But... how?" Cheerilee said in complete shock.
"It was easy," Wilson said. "I had a screwdriver in my pocket that I forgot about, took apart an empty desk, rearranged and bended someone the metal, and made it into a catapult."
"But... you made that in a minute."
"Yeah I procrastinated a bit."
"Does it work?" Cheerilee asked.
"Yeah," Wilson said putting a book on the catapult, tilting in back, and letting the book fly across the room.
"Okay... your group gets an A+"
"Awesome!" The CMC said.
"We have to have him around for projects," Sweetie Bell said.
"Deffinitely," The other two said.
"So the only reason I'm going to be in your group for now on, is so you fillies get A's?" Wilson asked.
"...Pretty much," Applebloom said.
"Fair enough," Wilson replied.
The class was over and recess began, all the ponies were outside having fun. "Can I go home now?" Wilson asked Cheerilee.
"No."
"Can't you write me..."
"You're not sick, you're not getting a pass to leave."
"But..."
"Diabetese doesn't count.
"But..."
"Schizophrenia doesn't count either."
"Can I..."
"You are not sleeping in class during recess."
"But..."
"Just do something phsyical!" Cheerilee angerly shouted.
"Fine... Who wants to make some money?" Wilson shouted holding up a deck of cards. The Fillies all cheered and Wilson ran over to them. As Cheerilee walked over to the group of ponies, Wilson said, "Okay so this game is called Black Mac. To win, your cards must equal up to 21, and if it goes past that, you lose."
"Wilson!" Cheerilee shouted.
"What?"
"Gambling is not allowed in schools."
"But we are outside."
Facehoofing herself to the point that she thought her skull broke, Cheerilee said, "Just... go to your desk... and take a nap."
Recess ended and it was back to class. Every group was working on the catapult, except Wilson's group, who were bored out of there minds. "Well I have nothing else for class other then this for the rest of the week," Cheerilee said. "So you four do not have to show up to school until next monday."
"Hurray!" the four shouted.
"Thats not fair!" Diamond Tiara yelled.
"Sit down... now," Wilson said giving her The Stare.
"...Anyways, when school ends in twenty minutes, you are free to go for the rest of the week." Cheerilee said.
The bell rang and class was over, all of the ponies left but Cheerilee stopped Wilson and said, "I want to talk to you."
A lot of the students started chanting, "Wilson is in trouble." When the last student left, Cheerilee closed the door and took a seat behind her desk.
"I saw what you did to DIamond Tiara and Silver Spoon," Cheerilee said. "And I have to say..."
"Oh come on!" Wilson shouted. "I don't deserve to get expelled, those two were pissing me off."
"Just stay quiet," Cheerilee said covering his mouth. "When I was teaching the kindergarten class last year, those two have pissed me off, and every other student almost everyday. I was afraid of losing my job if I yelled at them, and every other student was afraid that their family would get kicked out of Ponyville. I just wanted to say, thank you."
"...Okay."
"So I have a deal. You can stay in class and I'll put up with your crap as long as you can keep those two assholes quiet."
"Sounds like a good enough of a deal."
"Just please, I'm begging you. Please don't make my job a living hell."
"...Okay."
"But I do have a question. Your spelling ability is worse then a three-year-old, and yet you can build a nuclear factory in a day. How?"
"I'm not fully sure myself. I just like to build stuff and find it very easy."
"Okay then, your free to go."
"Great, see you next week," Wilson said opening the door. As he slowly closed it, Wilson gave out a laugh so distrubing that Cheerilee froze still in her seat.
"How could this happen to me? I haven't made any mistakes while teaching. It's not like I could just get another teaching job in Ponyville. How am I supose to carry on? I can slowly feel my sanity fading away, and I'm sick of this nonsense. I just want to scream and give up... how could this happen to me?"
