> Snapshots > by Nekiyha > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > Fun for the Author > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Twilight got the numbers from the sign-in desk near the starting line. Attaching hers to her flanks, Twilight trotted over to where Marjoram waited, and offered the signs with her magic. He took them in his, and attached them to his own flanks. Adjusting the harness strapped around his barrel, Marjoram double-checked the oxygen tank and tubing that would help him breathe during the Running of the Leaves. “Are you excited?” Twilight asked cautiously, “I’m nervous, even though I know so much about running-” “It’s your first race. It’s understandable,” Marjoram cut her off, “This is my first ‘official’ one. Carnation and I used to race quite a bit when we were younger.” Twilight helped Marjoram string the tubing over his back, and to his nose, making sure the lines were secure with an enchantment that would ensure the nubs would stay in his nostrils no matter what happened, “There. Now they won’t get tangled, and you can’t step on them.” Marjoram tested the weight on his back, and breathed deeply a few times, “I feel good about this. I’m aiming for halfway down the trail. Are you going to complete it?” “If I can,” Twilight replied, “You could make it too, you know. It’s been a very good year, and you barely look sick at all.” “Twilight, I’m attached to an oxygen tank. I look sick.” Twilight rolled her eyes, “Not compared to last year, you don’t. C’mon, let’s get going. I want to see if I can get at least fifth place again, I trained a little this year, and I know the trail.” “I’m sure you can make it. Just remember, Shores is at the finish line with cold drinks and baked goods.” “Croissants?” “And nanaimo bars. Shores knows how to tempt me. The thought of one of her nanaimo bars will get me through just about anything.” Twilight giggled, triple-checking to make sure Marjoram’s harness was on correctly, “You have the water?” “It’s strapped to the harness. Can’t you see the bottle?” “I know, I just-” “Get ready! Race starts in two minutes!” A voice called out from the sign-in desk. Twilight stepped closer to Marjoram as they took their places, keeping an eye on him as unfamiliar ponies pressed in close, getting ready to start. “Twilight?” “Marjoram?” Twilight looked to her left, and found Applejack and Rainbow Dash standing side-by-side, trying to hold back laughter. “Why are you two here?” “We’re going to run,” Marjoram stated dryly, “I thought it was obvious.” “You two, really?!” Rainbow laughed, leaning against Applejack, “have you ever done anything like this before?” “No,” Twilight replied, “I never have.” “I haven’t in a long time,” Marjoram replied stiffly, turning his attention to the trail in front of him. “I think this is a great thing you two are doin’!” Applejack said, hiding a giggle, “runnin’, I mean.” “Thank you!” Twilight replied cheerfully, ignoring their rudeness, “Good luck you two!” “Thanks,” Applejack smiled, “You too, you two!” Twilight focused her attention on the trail in front of her, trying desperately to ignore the giggling of her friends. Peering over at Marjoram, she saw the familiar look of shame, and slight humiliation. Her heart sank, knowing that Marjoram hated the fact he couldn’t be physically strong like the others. She offered a comforting smile just before the whistle to go went off. The vast majority of ponies took off in a dead sprint, including Rainbow and Applejack. This left Marjoram, Twilight, and a few stragglers behind. Taking off nice and steady, Marjoram and Twilight began at a trot. Soon enough, it became obvious the pair was the back of the pack, trotting slowly while everypony raced ahead, seeing who would win. “You can...go ahead,” Marjoram breathed, trying to save as much air for his body as possible, “Don’t worry...about me.” “I’ll stay with you,” Twilight smiled, “I don’t mind taking my time. The scenery is beautiful; we’ll have to see if we can bring Spike here before Autumn Wrap Up. I think he’d like it.” Marjoram nodded in agreement, breathing as best he could. Twilight kept a careful eye on Marjoram, though was pleased to note that Marjoram was holding up well. While he was breathing hard, he wasn’t coughing, and he didn’t look ill at all. This is good. Twilight told herself. Maybe he’ll be able to gallop a little near the end if this keeps up. After a few minutes, Twilight and Marjoram entered the forest, and Twilight slowed her pace a little, allowing Marjoram to do the same. The ponies ahead of them had done an excellent job shaking the leaves loose, leaving Twilight and Marjoram to trot through the last of the falling ones. Sunlight shone through the high branches of the many trees overhanging the trail, dappling the gold, brown, and red leaves on the ground with shafts of sunlight. The trees around them were barren, or mostly barren, of their leaves, making the trail feel a little creepy, despite the lovely scenery. “You okay?” Twilight asked. Marjoram nodded, “Yeah. Wanna go...a bit quicker?” “Sure,” Twilight increased their pace a little, and she was startled to notice that she could see the tail-end of the mob of ponies who had taken off at a sprint from the beginning, “Look!” Marjoram let out a strangled snort, “Creators...how angry will they...be if we...overtake?” “Probably pretty mad. Feel up to it?” Marjoram nodded once, blowing a loose strand of hair away from his face. He looked incredibly determined, and sped up before Twilight had a chance to. She matched his pace, and saw the glint in his eye. Usually it spelled doom to whomever had angered him, but Twilight knew that Marjoram was going to do as best as he could during this race. Probably out of spite rather than actual desire, but Twilight knew she couldn’t change his mind without at least a week’s notice, a new book, and lots of stern lecturing. This wasn’t an option, and Twilight just had to make sure Marjoram didn’t die of suffocation in the middle of the trail. Shores could kill him once she saw how tired Marjoram had made himself just because of Rainbow and Applejack’s insensitivity. Keeping half an eye on him, Twilight kept up easily, breathing smoothly as her legs began to burn because of the extended use. After only a few more strides, Marjoram and Twilight had passed the ponies in front of them, revealing the pack of ponies ahead, running together in a cloud of dust. “Just through...here,” Twilight panted, “to...the right.” Marjoram nodded, his golden eyes alight with a swirl of emotion. They kept at this pace until the woods thinned, then disappeared, revealing the flat field that made up the home stretch. “Ready to...gallop?” Twilight asked. Marjoram nodded once more, clearly saving whatever air he had left for the sprint ahead. Marjoram’s strides lengthened, and he picked up speed. Twilight, though she had shorter legs, was more conditioned to sprint. She kept up with Marjoram with relative ease, and with a nod, surpassed him. After a few more seconds, Twilight noted with surprise that Marjoram was keeping up with her, and that they were surpassing many of the ponies who had worn themselves out in the earlier stages of the race. It seemed the ponies were just as surprised as Twilight felt, judging from the looks of shock that appeared as the unicorns passed them. Twilight hated to admit it, but this was more fun than the last years Running of the Leaves had been. She was running with a member of her family and, though the worry that he was going to make himself sick doing so, they seemed to be catching up to the leaders of the race, including Applejack and Rainbow. Marjoram seemed to ramp up his speed once he laid eyes on the pair, and full-out sprinted. He ran like something was chasing him for food, or like Twilight herself was in trouble. Twilight nearly lost her balance with the shock, but she urged her legs to keep up. She failed, and in her effort to try to keep up, Twilight lost sight of her mentor. When she went under the banner marking the finish line, Twilight was certain she was going to collapse from the build-up of lactic acid in her muscles. She stumbled and collapsed, panting for breath. After the burning in her legs had diminished a little, Twilight got to her hooves, and looked around. Mayor Mare, who handed out medals trotted over, a smile plastered onto her face, “Good job once again, Twilight! Fifth place again!” Twilight bowed her head so Mayor Mare could put the medal around her neck, “Have you seen Marjoram?” “Yes I did, dear. He’s over there, beside the caterer. He won third technically, but second officially.” “Applejack and Rainbow tied again?” Twilight felt incredulous, but the meaning of Mayor Mare’s words struck home, “He got second!?” “Yes he did,” Mayor Mare smiled, “It was rather surprising.” “I’m going to go find him,” Twilight mumbled, “Thanks.” Marjoram was sitting on a blanket, his air-tank and harness off of his back and resting beside him. A gleaming gold medal was around his neck, and as Twilight neared, that didn’t seem to stop Shores from lecturing Marjoram on his health. Despite his heaving chest, and flushed face, Marjoram seemed rather pleased with himself. Twilight trotted over, beaming, “Second, huh?” “You were...fifth?” “Yeah. You did really well,” Twilight laid down on the blanket beside him, “How are you feeling?” “He’ll be feeling this stupid stunt of his for weeks!” Shores called from the food table, handing a pony a packet of apple fries. Marjoram let out a rasping chuckle, “Most likely.” “Idiot stallion,” Shores scolded, “I swear, I’m taking you to the hospital once this is all done to make sure you haven’t done any damage.” “It’s not like...I’m coughing blood.” “That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t spend the night in a hyperbaric chamber!” Marjoram rolled his eyes, “I’ll be...okay.” Shores snorted, “That’s what you always say, and with winter almost here I’m not taking any chances!” “Really...Shores, I’m...fine.” > Marjoram Has Mental Health Issues > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Marjoram stared at the wall opposite to his bed, physically seeing the naturally shaped wood of the tree, but finding it hard to mentally get past the fog that slowed him down. “Breakfast is ready!” Spike’s voice echoed down the stairs. Marjoram wasn’t hungry. He wasn’t ever hungry nowadays. Twilight got him to eat once a day, most of the time. It showed, and even though Marjoram knew he should care, he couldn’t bring himself to waste the time or energy to do so. Curling into himself more, Marjoram shut his eyes. Once again, he hadn’t slept more than an hour or two. Burning eyes unwillingly filled with frustrated tears. Marjoram forced them away, trying to steady his breathing. “Marjoram!?” Spike was at the top of the stairs, judging from how close he sounded. Marjoram sighed, listlessly lifting his head off the pillows, “Coming.” He didn’t really care if he was heard. Roll over. Breathe. Sit up. Let the dizzy spell pass and try not to cough so hard you puke as your lungs settle. Plant hooves on ground, and push. Marjoram wanted to collapse on a heap in bed and he’d barely gotten out of it. The stairs were another challenge that left him feeling breathless and dizzy. Licking dry lips, he turned towards the kitchen. Twilight and Spike were at the island, already eating. Pouring himself a cup of coffee, Marjoram stared down at the lovingly prepared eggs, and knew he wasn’t hungry. Somehow, he choked down a few mouthfuls with his three cups of coffee. Muttering a thank you, and putting his plate in the sink after scraping the eggs into the compost bin, Marjoram fetched his cloak and stepped out of the library. The cool, early morning breeze made him shiver, despite the warmth of his cloak. Ducking his head, Marjoram shuffled to his mortuary. There was an autopsy he had to finish, for another town far away from Ponyville. For family members who didn’t care what he did so long as the deceased’s past digressions stay hidden. Marjoram stopped caring about the ‘who’ a long time ago. He just needed to know the why and how. Hanging his cloak up, he changed into his scrubs and lab coat. Tying his mane back while he levitated the corpse onto the table, Marjoram set to work. Another corpse, another accidental death. More paperwork. Nothing new, nothing gained. What was the point. Marjoram sat in his too quiet office, staring at the completed paperwork with unfocused, burning eyes. He hesitantly reached out a hoof, and pushed his inkpot onto the completed paperwork. Black ink spread over the papers like a plague spreads through a populace. He righted the inkpot, still staring at the disaster in front of his very eyes. Another sigh. He threw the papers out, and started again. Another hour wasted. These pages were more ink-splattered than usual, since he hadn’t bothered to clean the little bit that had gotten onto his desk proper. No one would notice, so it was fine. Marjoram sealed them, staring at the almost empty inkpot. He’d need to order more. He wrote himself a note, and hopefully he’d remember again before he ran out completely. Marjoram locked the door, and was surprised to see the sun was setting. It hadn’t seemed like that long of a day, only eternity. Yet another sigh. Marjoram made his way to the library. He shut the door, but didn’t block the cold from following him inside. “How was your day!?” Spike asked from the kitchen, where he poured over a recipe book of some kind, the oven preheating. “Fine.” “Twilight and I reshelved!” Was Spike trying to be...too cheerful? Marjoram blinked, did it matter if Spike was trying to be too cheerful? Probably not. “That’s...good.” “I thought so.” Marjoram nodded, hanging the cloak up, “I’m...gonna go lie down. I’m not hungry.” “But-” “No thank you, Spike. If I want anything, you’ll be the first dragon I tell,” Marjoram tried to smile, but he knew it was likely just a poor grimace. Spike looked upset, and seemed helpless, “I..but…” “No. Thank. You,” That was harsher than Marjoram intended. Another grimace. “Okay.” Marjoram heads downstairs, and with practiced ease, collapses onto the bed. For a second, unbidden tears rise again. Marjoram swallows them before drowning them out with a cough. Marjoram squeezes his eyes shut, and holds his breath when he hears the front door open, and hears Twilight’s careful hoofsteps. A muffled conversation, Twilight sounding disappointed, and Spike sounding near tears. The fog deepens, and Marjoram only wishes a shadow would reach up and swallow him whole. He doesn’t wish for death, just not-existence. He’s hurting them, he thinks. And despite the ache in his chest, he still finds himself not caring. Not about himself, his work, his wellbeing, and not even Twilight or Spike. When was the last time he’d written Shores, or Celestia? Or even Luna? Marjoram squeezed his eyes shut tighter, sobs tearing at his body for several seconds before the sea of anguish diminishes as quickly as it came. The entire time, not a sound escaped him. He was as quiet as death, and he couldn’t help but catch a whiff of formaldehyde from his mane. Leveraging himself out of bed, trying not to stumble when the inevitable dizzy spell besets him, he gathers a towel, and makes his way back upstairs again. A conversation in the kitchen stops as soon as his hooves hit the main floor. He doesn’t even look at them. Moving into the main living quarters, where the private bathroom is tucked away, he can shower in relative peace. He starts the water as he hangs his towel up. It doesn’t take long for the water to warm. It seems Spike hasn’t taken one of his famously long baths recently. Marjoram climbs into the shower first, washing his mane and tail, and getting the worst of the who-knows-how-long-it’s-been grime off his coat. He turns the shower part off, plugging the drain, and fills himself a warm bath. Just because he can, he puts in a capful of Twilight’s bubble bath in the hot water as well. Some distant part of him hoped it would lighten his mood, maybe thin the fog. It doesn’t. That part of him, the part of him that seems to always be on the edge of weeping, cries. Marjoram can’t care. He rests in hot, clean water, trying to ease his sore muscles and joints. There’s limited success. When his muzzle touches the water without him realizing it, Marjoram reluctantly climbs to his hooves. He dries himself off as quickly as he can, unplugs the tub, and throws the towel in the hamper. When he makes his way back downstairs, his eyes can’t help but pass over the kitchen as they focus in on his destination. Spike seems near tears, furiously mixing something in a bowl. Twilight seems focused on her current book of choice, though she looks up at him. For just a fraction of a millisecond, their eyes meet. Then, he continues to the basement. Out of his peripheral vision, he sees Twilight staring after him like a frightened filly. Marjoram makes himself comfortable on the bed again, and sighs. Staring at the wall his bed lays flush against, he can only hope he’ll sleep. > Marjoram is Chronically Ill > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Marjoram is somepony who deals with illness. It was fact, like how Celestia controlled the sun. How Pegasi controlled the weather. Some knew the intricacies of how and why and how it hadn’t always been that way, but everypony knew it. Sometimes, someone would forget. Not for long, but they would. Then reality would crash back. Marjoram never forgot. His body wouldn’t let him. Fever, night sweats, chest pain, congestion, weakness, general malaise. Add in the symptoms of mild oxygen deprivation, his coughing fits, and everything else that had decided not to work properly, Marjoram was often miserable. Pain was constant, be it a low ache deep in his chest or the sharp pain of a migraine. Different things hurt at different times but pain was always there. Sometimes it drove him to be stronger. Usually, the pain just sapped at what little strength he had. It grated against frayed nerves, and on bad days Twilight and Spike had learned to develop thick skin. So, one morning in the coldest part of winter, Twilight wasn’t surprised when Marjoram didn’t come upstairs. She hoped against hope he would be asleep, but somewhere in her heart she knew he wasn’t. Twilight set her book down, and went to Marjoram’s stairs. Descending them, and opening it just a crack revealed Marjoram. He wasn’t sleeping, but it looked like he hadn’t bothered to get up yet either. “You getting up?” A breathy moan. Twilight smiled, though she wasn’t sure Marjoram could see it, “Okay. I’ll be upstairs if you need me.” Nothing, no reply. Twilight eased the door shut, and went back upstairs. She sighed, making a mental note to bring some food down for him by lunchtime. Even if he didn’t eat, it wouldn’t hurt to get a good look at him. She sat back with her book, and continued to read the newest Daring Do book. She and Rainbow would need to discuss this one: it was emotionally charged and packed full with plot twists and hoof-biting action. Marjoram, downstairs, listened as Twilight settled herself back upstairs. He wanted desperately to get out of bed: he wanted to read the new Daring Do book, wanted to chat with Spike about growing gems, wanted to go for a walk to Sugarcube Corner… Marjoram wanted to do a lot of things, but his body had other ideas. He knew that getting out of bed would be a lengthy process, and Marjoram simply didn’t care. He didn’t have the energy to waste simply getting out of bed. Not today. Frustrated tears welled, and Marjoram had to bite them back. He buried his head into his pillow, squeezing his eyes shut in an attempt to ignore the sounds of life commencing from the sounds of Spike’s feet crossing above him. Marjoram was sick, and he could never forget it. > A Solemn Pinkie Promise > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Twilight tucked Spike into his basket with a sad smile, “There you are. You can read a comic before you fall asleep. Don’t wait up for me, this shouldn’t take very long.” “Promise?” “Yeah. I’m just going to go chat with the girls for a little. If...if you hear anything from Marjoram’s room, write Princess Celestia.” “Suspicious?” “He’s...he’s not doing very well. Princess Celestia will know what to do. I’ll be at Sugarcube Corner. Just the one comic, okay?” “Okay,” Spike whispered. Twilight nuzzled him, “Goodnight. Hopefully tomorrow will be better.” Spike nodded, picking up a new comic and settling in to read under the little lamp beside his basket. Twilight offered another reassuring smile before she entered the public part of the library. She sighed, casting a forlorn look at Marjoram’s door as she passed. The cold, night air invigorated her somewhat. In the darkness, Luna’s sky provided ample illumination. Twilight made her way through the too quiet streets of Ponyville, towards the closed Sugarcube Corner. Ignoring the locked front doors, Twilight went to the back of the building, climbing a staircase that served two purposes: a fire escape, and a separate entrance to Pinkie’s apartment. Pinkie’s lights were on, which was good. Twilight was worried she was running late. “There you are, darling,” the door opened before Twilight even knocked, “We were getting worried.” “I’m late?” “By nearly forty-five minutes,” Even Pinkie seemed more subdued than usual. “Sorry girls. Marjoram...wasn’t himself today and Spike took the brunt of it. I had to calm him down enough to go to bed.” “Nothing...physical?” “No, no of course not!” Twilight looked disgusted at the idea, “Marjoram was just a little verbally harsher than usual.” “I saw him earlier today. He’s not...looking his best is he?” “I saw him too, he looks like shit,” Rainbow stated bluntly, examining a chip in her hoof. “Rainbow!” Rarity looked surprised at the vulgarity. “It’s the truth,” Applejack defended, “sadly,” she added hastily. “I-I know. He looks...better now. He took a shower.” Rainbow snorted, “That won’t be enough. Even his eyes aren’t right. He looks like he died!” There was silence at that, for several heartbeats. “Too harsh Rainbow,” Fluttershy gently chides. Rainbow snorts, rolling her eyes. Suddenly, Twilight felt herself break down. The stress, and worry, and everything of the last weeks came to the forefront of her mind. She was surrounded by friends who could mentally help, and she felt like she could let go of her problems out without burdening anyone who couldn’t handle it. “Oh, oh Twilight-” “What’s wrong-” “I didn’t mean to hurt you-” “Girls! One at a time!” Applejack interrupted. Silence, except for Twilight’s sobs. Twilight looked around at her friends, hiccuping, “I’m sorry...I’ve just been so worried lately.” “It’s okay, sugarcube,” Applejack reassured, “We understand. How can we help?” Twilight looked down at her hooves, sniffling, “I just don’t understand what’s going on.” “You...weren’t in a class with uh, mental illness as a main topic?” Twilight blinked, “It’s super rare-” “It’s very common. That’s why we learn about different ones. It doesn’t always help, not with how hush-hush it all is, but that’s why we’re taught.” “Really? The teacher made it seem like it wasn’t important.” “Well, then, Your teacher was wrong,” Applejack looked to the others, almost begging for help with her eyes. The others refused to meet her gaze. “I just want things back to normal,” Twilight whispered brokenly, “I keep thinking I’ll wake up and he’ll-he’ll-” Twilight broke down into tears again, sobbing harder. Applejack left her chair, and wrapped Twilight in a hug. The others followed suite, all whispering reassurances. “I’m so scared,” Twilight muttered into Applejack’s neck, “He’s not himself, and he’s wasting away and-” “It’s okay, Twilight-” “It isn’t!” Twilight pulled away so Applejack could see her eyes. They were red and bloodshot, dark circles rimming them. Tears matted the fur of her face, and her nose was beginning to run, “It isn’t okay, Applejack! He’s sick, and this isn’t like his cough! I can’t fix this!” “In the morning, you write to the princess and tell her what’s going on. She’ll know what to do.” “I don’t want to waste-” “This isn’t a waste of time Twilight. Not for her, not for you, and certainly not for Spike or Marjoram. You want Marjoram around as long as he can, right?” “Yes.” “Then, write to Princess Celestia first thing. Have Spike deliver it. If you can get Marjoram to eat and drink, do it. Whatever he wants, so long as he’s eating something. That’ll help.” Twilight snuffled again. Pinkie Pie handed her a box of tissues. Twilight took the box gratefully, leaning away from everyone else. The girls settled themselves back in their chairs as Twilight wiped at her still leaking eyes and nose. “Then what?” “Try to talk to him. If he shuts you out, just let him know you’re there. Remind him that you love him, and that you always will.” “That’s it?” “Sometimes that’s all you can do, Twi. Until the princess writes back. Write Shores while you’re at it, too. She’ll want to be informed.” “What do I tell them?” Twilight’s eyes shone with unshed tears and fear. “The truth. That’s all you can do.” Twilight nodded, eyes catching sight of Pinkie’s clock, “Oh! I should go home! I told Spike not to wait up, but he probably still is-” “Twilight,” Applejack interrupted, “Sit down for just one more minute.” Twilight sat back, curiosity overshadowing her grief for a moment. “What will you do if something happens?” “Like what?” “Like if he tries...if he tries to kill himself.” Twilight’s eyes widened, and she started crying with renewed vigour. Rarity glared in Applejack’s direction, “Tact!” Applejack shrugged helplessly, “I’m sorry, but it needed to be said-” “That was so much harsher than what I said-” “Girls!” Fluttershy’s normally whispery voice was sharp and clear. All attention landed on the pegasus, even Twilight’s unfocused eyes landing on the source of the sudden noise. Fluttershy cleared her throat, “I uh. I um...it’s good to get it in the open, right?” Twilight shook her head, “I’ve been trying not to think about it. I don’t know what I’d do.” “It’s hard, but you need to have a plan. Put Ponyville’s emergency numbers on your fridge-” “Already have them.” “Oh...um…” “What else, then? What can I do?” “Just call who you have to, I suppose. Acting quickly might help, if it ever comes to that.” Twilight nodded, swallowing thickly. She blew her nose, and wiped at her eyes again. She tried to hand the tissues back to Pinkie, but Pinkie shook her head. Twilight tried to smile, but she just sobbed again. Pinkie hugged Twilight, rubbing soothing circles into her back, “It’s okay, Twilight. We’ll get him smiling again soon!” “I hope you’re right, Pinkie,” Twilight whispered, “I-I don’t know if I can watch him go on like this for much longer.” “You won’t have to, not if you write to the princess.” Twilight nodded, sniffling, “Thank you, girls. I’ll write to her first thing in the morning. I really can’t thank you enough.” Twilight extracted herself from Pinkie, only to be swallowed up by a group hug. Still sniffling, and crying as silently as possible, Twilight let herself out of Pinkie’s apartment. The door swung shut, leaving five mares to their thoughts. “Do you think he’d do it?” Pinkie asked suddenly, her voice hoarse and low. She’d been trying hard to stay cheerful for Twilight’s sake, but it was hard to lie to herself. “He’s sick,” Fluttershy intoned, almost unheard, “Lots of animals have a...plan, in case they get worse.” “You mean, he could have a plan to take his own life? And he could have had one for a long time?” Fluttershy shrugged, shrinking under the attention, “I-I don’t know. We’re more complex, but-” “Whatever,” Rainbow tossed her head to the side, flipping her forelock, “He shouldn’t be this selfish.” “Rainbow!” Applejack snapped, “You know that’s not how it works!” “What are you? A psychologist?” “You’re not either, y’know! I did some research before Apple Bloom took that class, so I could answer any questions she had. I’m not nobody in this field of medicine, but I’m smart enough to recognize the signs! Damned stallion is depressed, and he might be suicidal if we don’t do something about it soon!” Silence. Even Applejack shocked herself at her blunt delivery. Though, it felt good to speak frankly and clearly. No more sidestepping the issue. Rainbow had the decency to look a little ashamed, “We’ll help him, AJ. You know that.” “I know. Promise me girls, we’ll help them however we can.” “Pinkie Promise!” So, sitting in Pinkie’s living room at almost one in the morning, five mares made a solemn Pinkie Promise. They wouldn’t let Twilight, or her family, down. Not if they had the power to help. > Living with Depression is Hard > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Marjoram slept for nearly sixteen hours, and he felt like he’d gotten maybe five. Staring into the mirror, at his exhausted face, Marjoram looked like death warmed over. His eyes were sunken into their sockets, red-rimmed and surrounded by dark circles. On top of the fact his eyes looked like they belonged on a corpse, no wonder nopony wanted to meet his gaze recently. The light, the life, behind them was gone. His eyes were flat and hollow, lifeless. A knock on the bathroom door, “Um? I have to go!” Spike’s voice broke, speaking volumes of his urgency. Jolting to his feet, nearly toppling over into the sink, Marjoram found his way to the door while the room was still spinning, “Sorry.” Spike darted in, shutting the door, “It’s okay!” Marjoram stood on the landing on uncertain, shaky legs. Thankfully, the world had decided to stop rotating around him, so he could see. Getting downstairs was painstaking, but well-worth it. Twilight waited for something in the oven, humming a tune under her breath. She looked tired as well, but not terminally so like Marjoram. She half turned, and spotted Marjoram, and a strained smile bloomed. “Hello, Sleeping Beauty! What have I done to earn your appearance?” Marjoram snorted, an echo of amusement, “Something smells good.” The words felt strange on his tongue, as nothing had appealed to him in weeks. Twilight’s smile blossomed into something closer to the real thing, “Spike and I are making some garlic bread to go with the soup Spike made last night. Would you like some? I know it’s not exactly breakfast material-” “It sounds perfect,” Marjoram interrupted, seating himself on a stool. As he did, joints in his back cracked. He was stiff all over from sleeping for so long. “I’m glad!” Twilight beamed at him. Is she purposefully trying to be cheerful? Remembering the harsh tone he’d used with Spike the day before, Marjoram decided he could probably learn from Twilight. The timer dinged and Twilight used her magic to levitate a tray of steaming, cheesey garlic buns out of the oven. Marjoram raised an eyebrow; they looked like Shores’s. “She gave me the recipe when we moved here,” Twilight explained, “and this is the first time I thought to make them! Spike helped, speaking of,” Twilight went to the bottom of the stairs, “Dinner’s ready!” “They smell amazing, they really do.” “Here you are, I know you use the soup more like a sauce anyway. I’ve got plenty here, so if you want more, you can have some more!” Marjoram stared at the little bowl of soup accompanied by the three buns. His mouth watered, and he couldn’t help but start to eat. For what seemed like the first time in a long time, Marjoram felt hungry. Marjoram ate everything, finishing before everypony else. Even with a headstart, that was a rarity. “Thank you both,” Marjoram got to his hooves slowly, wincing at the uncomfortable fullness in his stomach. “No’ a pr’blm!” Spike said around a mouthful of food. Twilight shot him a glare, but nodded in agreement. Marjoram offered a small smile, and wandered into the living room. Yawning, he slumped onto the couch. All he’d done was sleep, have a shower, and eat. He felt like he’d been doing things all day; tired and sore. Shutting his burning eyes, Marjoram tried to bring his thoughts into some semblance of order. A dim hope that someday soon would be somewhat productive. His thoughts were muddled and tangled, and trying to find a single one that would lead to something productive was beyond difficult. Sighing, and trying again, Marjoram managed to shift through some of the fog in his brain. Fragments, half-thoughts floated idly by. No autopsies needed to be done, and Marjoram had really stopped his research the second he’d set hoof in Ponyville. Marjoram hated to admit it, but even after sixteen hours he’d be willing to go back to bed in a heartbeat. Something, though, was holding him back. He knew it wasn’t right to feel that way, and he felt determined to do something else before going back to bed. He lacked the focus for reading or drawing or even planning Spike’s lessons. A gentle hoof touched his shoulder, and Marjoram started violently, nearly making himself sick at the hard coughs that shook his frame. Twilight tentatively rubbed a few circles along his back, waiting and ready to fetch his tea. Shakily, Marjoram caught his breath again. “I was wondering if you would like to come grocery shopping with Spike and I. I understand if you don’t want to-” “I’ll come,” Marjoram rasped, “I should do something productive today.” Twilight offered a reassuring smile, “You chatted with us and ate something. Both productive things, even if they’re small.” Marjoram blinked slowly, “I...suppose so.” “Now, c’mon. Let’s go, Spike wants to try making lasagna this week so we might need to get more garlic than usual.” “Maker help us all,” Marjoram returned wryly. Twilight smiled brightly, almost too brightly, but Marjoram felt himself returning a genuine smile. For a moment, the fog lifted. Before they left, the fog had returned in all it’s passivity. > Shores Arrives, Finally > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Marjoram looked horrible. His coat wasn’t as shiny as it should’ve been. His mane and tail looked scraggly and uncared for. His hooves were chipped and uneven. Most worryingly of all, Shores noted, was that he’d lost almost all of the weight he’d worked so hard to put on. She could see most of his bones, and he just looked so skeletal. Above everything, Marjoram looked tired. Exhaustion was evident in how he held himself. Bloodshot eyes were ringed red and purple from fatigue, and his voice was even heavy with lack of sleep. It’s a good thing Twilight wrote us. Shores noted. He looks almost as bad as he did after Carnation. Trotting over to where Marjoram was standing listlessly beside Twilight, who seemed to be buying groceries, Shores flung her bags down and nearly tackled him in a crushing hug. Marjoram’s legs almost buckled, but somehow he managed to keep himself upright. Tired eyes stared at her uncomprehending for a moment, before they lit up with joy. “What are you doing here!?” “I decided to drop by for a surprise visit! I do get a vacation, after all, and what better way to spend it than to come here and spend it with you!?” Truthfully, this was one of the few times Shores had ever asked for extended leave, and knowing the circumstances, Celestia had practically helped Shores pack her bags. “Seriously? You don’t take vacations!” “Usually I see you everyday, you crazy stallion! So, here I am!” Marjoram looked at Shores, then slowly turned to Twilight, “Did you know?” Twilight looked happier than Shores had thought she would. Twilight looked worse for wear too, like she’d been studying for tests for a week straight. A strained giggle escaped Twilight before she nodded, “Yes I did! I didn’t want to ruin the surprise.” “That’s why you bought so much garlic at the store,” Spike muttered suddenly. “I could have bought my own ingredients, Twilight, you know that!” “Yeah, but I thought it would be nice to have some things on standby!” Twilight protested, “You know, so we could all spend some time together before you started to cook!” Shores smirked, “You know cooking isn’t all I do.” “You’ve seen me,” Marjoram said dryly, “You’ll be cooking for however long you’re staying.” Shores had to bite her tongue from making a remark about Marjoram’s current weight. Somehow, she managed, “Yes well, it’s not as if you cook often.” “I cook lots now!” Spike beamed, “Could you teach me some things while you’re here!?” “Of course, Spike!” Shores smiled back, “Now, do you mind taking me back to the library, Marjoram? I should drop my bags off. We can catch up a little while Twilight and Spike finish shopping.” “Sure,” Marjoram used his magic to lift up Shores’s discarded saddlebags. Shores smiled, “C’mon, you. Let’s go.” Marjoram seemed ready to fall over if a harsh breeze picked up, but he kept up with her gait without hesitation. His breathing was audible, but it usually was. “So, where will I be sleeping?” “With me, potentially. Or on one of the couches or something. I’m fairly certain one of them folds out into a bed.” Shores nodded, “That’s good. I hope you don’t mind, but I’m going to go wash up in the bathroom. It was a long flight, and I want to be nice and fresh for the first day.” “There’s towels in the cupboard beside the bathroom if you want a shower,” Marjoram said, “Same with spare washcloths. I’ll set your things in the kitchen, if you don’t need them now.” “A shower does sound nice, and the kitchen is fine. I’ll be quick.” Marjoram smiled, and Shores could see it was a genuine smile, “Take your time. I don’t have anything to do today.” Shores smiled brightly, “Alright! Just don’t go do anything too stupid while I’m in there! I want to hear about what’s been going on in Ponyville!” “It’s Ponyville. Nothing important has been going on,” Marjoram retorted. “I don’t live here. Share idle gossip with me like the petty ponies we really are. I want to know all the details!” “It’s me.” “Don’t give me that, I know you enjoy knowing too much about ponies.” Marjoram’s lips twisted into a grim smile, “True enough. Off with you now! Shower first, then gossip!” > Parasprite Conundrum > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- “What in the hell is that?” Marjoram asked flatly, tired eyes staring at the little insect nestling in Twilight’s mane.   “Fluttershy found it! Isn’t it cute!?” “That doesn’t answer the question, does it?”   “Look at it! It’s got the cutest, round eyes, and look at it’s wings! They’re so oddly shaped, same with the body. This little guy shouldn’t really fly like it does, and it clearly tucks its wings somewhere when it curls up like this!”   Marjoram stared, taking a long pull from his coffee pot, “I don’t suppose you’ll let me examine one?”   “Not while it’s alive! It’s a pet, no matter how weird!”   “I give it maybe a day before you try to figure this thing out.”   “Hey!”   “It’s too weird a mystery. Did you girls ask anypony what this was?”   “Pinkie acted weird but she usually does. She said something about...paraspit? Parasprite? Something like that. She was just being Pinkie.”   “Are you certain? You know Pinkie has more to her than what she seems. Have you noticed anything odd?”   “Well, they’re multiplying at an extraordinary rate. Fluttershy said she found one, and when she saw Pinkie and I she had  three.”   Marjoram set his coffee mug down and sighed, “That’s not good. Why, why did you take one?”   “They’re so cute! How can you say no to this cute little face!”   The insect in question let out a petite chirp, nestling deeper into Twilight’s mane.   “What does it eat?”   “Fluttershy didn’t say.”   “Did she mention where she found it?” Marjoram rubbed at his head like he was trying to ease a mounting headache.   “Near the forest while she was gathering flowers for the Princess’s get together.”   “Edge of the Everfree, then. Probably from there then. Not good.”   “Why!?”   “Don’t you mares know anything about unsettled zones!?”   Twilight blinked, then glared, “I’m from Canterlot.”   “So am I! And this is the edge of the settled zone! There are signs all along the edge of the forest warning ponies away from dangerous creatures!”   “How can something so cute be dangerous!”   “Ponies used to think Timberwolves were cute! Want to know how many died because of stupid accidents!?”   “These aren’t Timberwolves!”   “How do you know this won’t become the next thing that kills the next bunch of foolish ponies!?”   “Hey!”   “You’re the genius who took the damned thing! Here, give it to me. I’ll take it to Zecora. If Fluttershy didn’t know what it is, and if I haven’t read about it in the guide to the Everfree, she’s our next best bet.”   Twilight frowned, but nodded. Using her magic gently, she transferred the insect to Marjoram’s mane, where it burrowed in comfortably. Marjoram shuddered at the sensation.   “I’ll keep cleaning the library, then,” Twilight smiled.   Marjoram nodded, forgoing his cloak, and left the library. Walking briskly in the pleasant breeze wasn’t too taxing, though if this sort of thing happened too often...Marjoram did not savour the thought of trying to get to Zecora’s in the middle of winter, though he wouldn’t hesitate if it were needed.   Trying to keep his breathing steady, Marjoram made good time. Knocking on the door, he waited for Zecora to answer. Moments later, Zecora appeared, a smile appearing on her face when she realized who her visitor was.   “I did not expect a friend this day, tell me, is everything okay?”   “Not really, Zecora. Fluttershy found this,” Marjoram pulled the insect from his mane to show her, “Near the edge of the Everfree. Now it seems like everypony has one, though no one knows what they are. I hoped you’d know.”   At the sight of the insect, Zecora’s eyes widened and her ears flew back, “Oh no, a monster of little size. This is a parasprite before my eyes!”   “Are they dangerous? Should I be worried?”   “Tales of crops and harvests consumed. If these are in Ponyville...you’re doomed.”   “There’s nothing we can do!?”   Zecora shook her head sadly, “Nothing to my knowledge, my friend. They may even bring Ponyville’s end.”   “I don’t believe this. Thank you for telling me, Zecora. I’ve got to head back to warn everypony!” Turning on the spot, Marjoram grasped the parasprite with his magic before galloping away. He got several meters away from Zecora’s still open door before she heard the sound of him coughing.   Zecora sighed, and shut the door. Looking about her cabin, she began to pack. Perhaps, getting out of Ponyville with her own foodstuffs intact would be good. Especially before desperate ponies came. She’d give them a day before things devolved seriously. She’d check on the village before leaving, just in case, but otherwise it was best to be prepared.     Galloping into Ponyville, sweat pouring off of him, and barely breathing, Marjoram didn’t even register the looks of panic on the residents as he passed them. A small part of his brain registered that it probably looked like he was running from a dangerous animal. The same part of him also laughed internally.   Throwing the door of the library open revealed a curious scene. Dozens of parasprite were covering every available surface, even clinging to the ceiling and bookshelves. Twilight and Spike were desperately trying to get the parasprites out of the open window, but were having limited success.   Trembling, out of breath, and not sure if he should laugh or cry, Marjoram crumpled to the wooden floor, heaving with laughter and coughing. Twilight and Spike froze mid-motion, sharing confused looks that quickly turned to concern.   “What did Zecora say!?”   “We’re...doomed,” Marjoram managed to wheeze, still choking back laughter.   “Why are you laughing!?” Twilight squeaked.   “It’s either that or cry!” Spike interjected, “What do we do!?”   Marjoram nearly jumped out of his skin when Pinkie materialized beside him.   “We need a triangle!”   “A what?” Twilight, Spike, and Marjoram said in unison.   “A triangle! You know, the thing you play!” Pinkie mimed hitting a triangle.   Twilight and Marjoram shared a look, and Twilight looked sheepish, “Do you know how to stop them?”   “I need to get as many instruments as possible. If we play them, we can lead them right out of town!”   “How do you know this? This isn’t in any of the books!”   “Zecora didn’t...know either.”   “I lived in a really isolated rock farm! What food we could get, we needed. It was passed down through the generations of the Pie family!”   “Huh,” Spike nodded appreciatively, “That’s kinda cool.”   “Granny Pie was the best!” Pinkie agreed, “Now, can somepony help me-”   “What do you have?”   “Just about everything I need! I just need something with pizzaz!”   Marjoram, who still hadn’t picked himself off of the ground, shook with renewed laughter, “Where in the hell...are we supposed to find an instrument...that has enough pizazz...for Pinkie!?”   Twilight blinked, then saw the problem, “I really don’t know.”   Spike, in spite of himself, giggled too. After a second, Twilight’s resolve crumbled as well. Pinkie blinked at the three of them, “Why are you laughing!?”   Marjoram opened his mouth to reply, but his laughing triggered a coughing fit. Spike was in stitches, leaning against a bookshelf, and Twilight had tears streaming down her cheeks. All of them were unable to answer.   Letting out a short, frustrated squeak, Pinkie ran off. That led to Twilight, Spike, and Marjoram lead into even worse laughter.   Marjoram’s lungs cut the laughter short, forcing Twilight to dose him with the spell that Celestia had taught her.   Wheezing and still chuckling, Marjoram had to force himself to breathe.   “We’re terrible,” Spike managed in between giggles.   “Shock is one...heck of a drug,” Twilight replied, vainly wiping at her eyes.   “We probably...should help,” Marjoram gasped.   “No kidding,” Spike straightened, still chuckling weakly.   “Okay, so I’ll track her down to see if we can’t find the final instrument, can you two try to do damage control?”   Spike and Marjoram shared a look. Marjoram climbed slowly to his feet, moving so Twilight could see the damage, “Little late now.”   “Ah, well can you tell ponies we’re looking for instruments, and for ponies who can play to meet beside the fountain in Town Square?”   “Got it,” Spike mock saluted.   Lips still twitching, Marjoram nodded in agreement.   Assured, Twilight galloped off. Spike and Marjoram shared one last giggle before venturing out into the chaos of the street.