> Should I Stay (or Should I Go?) > by fallen starr > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > Chapter One > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- The corridors in the castle were completely empty. Not a single guard was on post. Her hooves echoed loudly as she trotted, looking for any sign of movement, any sign that she was not totally and utterly alone. She looked up ahead, at the heavy door. Guards should have been at the ready. Two on either side of the door. One making rounds patrolling the halls. The maids keeping the place clean. Schools being shown around on strict guided tours, filling the courtyard outside the windows with gleeful shouts. Staff ensuring visiting dignitaries had every level of comfort. Bureaucrats doing whatever it was they did. Sunset had ever cared for that, instead keeping her eye on the main prize. Again, even during the day, the lack of guards by the door was worrying. She wasn’t a threat anymore, but at one time she had been. With a sigh she reached out with her magic… She reached out with her magic… Stomping her front hooves on the ground, she closed her eyes and focused. She could do this. She was a unicorn. One of the most gifted unicorns in Equestria. She had enough magical power to do nearly anything she wanted. It would not come. Her magic wasn’t responding to the call. There was nothing there. She tried harder, searching deep within herself for that solid thread. She had used it last time she was here. Her breaths were becoming shorter, her eyes wide as she looked around for anyone. Someone had to be there to help her. She ran forward, pushing with all her might against the door, but it wouldn’t budge. Tears were soaking into the fur on her cheeks and dripping onto the floor. There was no one. All the doors in the hall were closed She was utterly alone. Sunset Shimmer sat up in her bed, looking around wildly. She caught her breath as she took in her surroundings. A dresser full of clothing, and a closet with the same. A desk littered with papers and books and electronics. Her blankets laid piled on the floor. Slowly, she laid back, relief flooding through her. It was a dream. Nothing but a dream. The door to her room creaked open and the familiar face of Celestia peered in. Sunset sat up, looking at the woman who had taken her in. Celestia’s eyebrows raised in worry as she stepped into the room. She bent down and retrieved the tangle of sheets and blankets off the ground. “Is everything okay?” Sunset watched as she separated the coverings. “Just a bad dream.” She pulled her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. “I couldn’t reach my magic. It was terrifying. There was no one at the castle, and I was…I was alone.” The blankets were separated and lying on the floor again. Celestia sat on the bed next to Sunset and wrapped an arm around her. She used her free hand to gently bring Sunset’s face up around to look into her eyes. “I won’t leave you alone, Sunset. Neither will your friends. We all care about you.” Unable to hold Celestia’s gaze, Sunset looked at her toes. “I know. I just.” She sighed. “I miss my home. The feel of magic running through my body. The cobblestones under my hooves. Everything.” Celestia rubbed Sunsets back. “Why don’t you go back?” she asked. “The portal is always open now, isn’t it? You can always go and visit.” Sunset nodded. “It’s open. At least, to anyone with magic. So myself and the girls.” They sat in silence for a moment, until Sunset yawned. Standing, Celestia sighed. “Why don’t you get some rest, and we can talk about this more in the morning.” “Yeah, that sounds good.” Sunset flopped back, her head bouncing once on her pillow. “We both have school, anyway.” She started at the feeling of a sheet falling over her. She looked over and saw Celestia smiling as she covered her charge with a blanket as well. “Sweet dreams.” “Yeah, goodnight.” Her door closed with a click. She listened as Celestia walked back down the hallway to her own room and that door shut. When the school had been totally destroyed when she had turned into a she-demon, her foster parents had kicked her out. That had been her final strike, and she was going to be put into a group home, out of district, and sent to another school. Celestia had stepped in. It had been strange at first, living with Principal Celestia. There had been rules and structure Sunset didn’t think she needed, that had reminded her of a time before she came to the human world, when she had spurned every good thing offered to her because she felt she deserved better. Sunset rolled onto her side, facing the wall. This Celestia was different. She wasn’t thousands of years old. Only decades. She lost her temper. She wasn’t Princess Celestia, she was just Celestia. She was just a person. This world was so different than home, and yet so much like home it made the homesickness worse. She squeezed her eyes tight together. Tomorrow would be a better day. Her friends would be at school and she could talk to them. Celestia was right. They would always be there with her. A loud slam of a tray onto the lunch table captured everyone’s attention. Twilight dropped into her chair, righting the chug of milk that had fallen over. She took a deep breath in and closed her eyes before releasing it slowly. “Well now, what’s got you so worked up?” Applejack asked. Her cheeks were still red, but she seemed to have calmed some. “Everfree rejected my application. My references said I wasn’t to be trusted.” She took another deep breath. “I could just scream. Everyone here will know Cinch is just angry but there isn’t a way to prove it. She blocked me from my dream school.” A pale yellow hand patted Twilight’s shoulder. Rarity scoffed, putting her sandwich on the tray. “You could fight it.” Twilight shook her head. “No, by the time anything actually was accomplished, it would be too late. I’ve already been accepted by two of my back-ups. I’m just waiting to hear from the rest before I make my decision.” Finally, she relaxed back into her chair and picked up her sandwich. “Which schools did you girls apply to?” Sunset sat her milk down, her stomach tightening. Colleges. “Oh, I’ve applied to one school that specializes in fashion design, it’s very small. I’ve also applied to several schools with a fashion design major, as most don’t seem to offer it.” Of course Rarity would want to go to some school across the country to study fashion. Probably some exclusive place a famous fashion designed graduated from. “Ah, I was accepted at U of C, so I’m just going there.” With two sports scholarships, she would be crazy not to, and it would be returning home for Dash. “Me, too. They have a nice pre-vet program.” Fluttershy was following Dash, of course. Not that it really mattered. Pre-vet was standard and could be done nearly anywhere. “Oh, the Cakes want me to go to this really great culinary school, but my parents aren’t so sure I should. I applied anyway, but I also applied other places.” Pinkie was always the wild card. Sunset half expected her to just take over The Sweet Shoppe once she graduated. “I’m thinking I might just go to the local community college. Stay on the farm and help out. It’s what Mac did.” Apple Jack, ever practical and focused on her family and the farm. A silence fell over the group and Sunset looked up to see everyone looking at her. She looked at each of them before realizing they were waiting on her. “Oh. I’m not going anywhere. I wouldn’t even know where to start.” She could follow any of them somewhere, but college was different than high school. She would have to make new friends, because her current friends were going to separate, and even the ones that would be near each other wouldn’t talk as much, because they found other people who are interested in the same things and— Someone was forcedly pulling on her arm, causing her to nearly fall out of her chair. She glared over. “What the hay, Twilight?” “We’ve got to get you to the guidance office pronto. It isn’t too late to apply, but it is almost.” She looked panicked. “You can’t not go to college.” Sunset freed her wrist from Twilight’s grasp, placing her hands on Twilight’s shoulders. “Listen, it’s okay. I just don’t think school, here, if for me. I can’t study magic or anything. I’m just going to…” Twilight waited. Wrinkling her brow in concern, Twilight stepped closer. “Going to do what, Sunset?” Sunset shook her head, shrugging. “Figure things out. I’ll be fine.” Dinner was quiet that night. Since moving in, Celestia had been careful to only serve vegetarian meals, though that had clashed with her own eating habits from before. Tonight was Portobello burgers and sweet potato fries. Sunset sighed, poking at one of the fries. She wanted to talk to Celestia about it, to look into those warm eyes, so full of care and trust, and explain everything, starting again with the dream. She looked up to see Celestia watching her. She sighed again, straightening up in her seat. “I’m sorry. I was thinking.” She waited a beat before continuing, looking back down at her half-eaten burger. “Everyone is leaving. They’ve all applied to colleges and have all these plans.” She swallowed, looking up. “High school doesn’t last forever, and I knew that. I didn’t care at this time last year.” She pushed her plate away, shaking her head. “I have nothing here, and home holds nothing. A disappointed princess, and a reflection of what I could have been. I don’t…” she the burning as the tears began to build. “I don’t know what I’m going to do.” She buried her face in her hands, taking deep breaths to try to stop the tears. She flinched slightly at the surprise of Celestia rubbing her back. The chair scooted closer to her and they sat like that for a moment, in silence while Sunset collected herself and Celestia comforted her. After she was certain tears wouldn’t stream down her face, she looked up at Celestia, sniffling. Celestia smiled at her, holding one of her hands. “This is a scary part of growing up. There is a lot of pressure to make these next few years be the focus on which you hang your future, and as a principal I understand the pressure that are put onto your shoulders.” Celestia pushed Sunset’s hair behind her ears. “It’s okay if you don’t have everything planned out. I don’t think anyone ever really does. I didn’t set out to become a principal, it’s just the way it worked out. As your,” she hesitated for a half second, just long enough for Sunset to notice “guardian, I know that you can do whatever it is you want. Even if it takes a while, or a path you never knew it would take.” Sunset swallowed and took another deep breath. “I just want to go home.” > Chapter Two > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- The phone on the nightstand was buzzing. Sunset forced her eyes open, squinting at the bright light coming from her phone screen. She grabbed the phone and blinked several times as her eyes adjusted to the light, all the while her phone buzzing intermittently. text after text coming in about graduation preparation. With a groan, she sat the phone face down and sat up. Her room was still perfectly dark, though a slit of light could be seen under her door, letting her know Celestia was awake. She blinked a couple more times before picking her phone back up. Someone had started a new group message, and everyone was talking as they got dressed for graduation. Rarity had sent pictures, asking for help with her entire wardrobe, and ultimately choosing something different entirely. Twilight was having a melt down over giving a speech to the entire class. While everyone knew she was the top of their year, switching in the middle of senior year like she had, no one expected her to actually get valedictorian. Rarity was reassuring Fluttershy, who was afraid she would fall and everyone would laugh. Pinkie was talking about how great it would be after the ceremony, when everyone’s families was going to get together and celebrate at the Sweet Shoppe, which had closed especially for the day. It seemed Rainbow Dash wasn’t awake yet. At least, she hadn’t been active in the chat. A knock came on the bedroom door. “Sunset, are you awake? We’ll have to be there early.” “I’m awake. Thank you.” She stared down at her phone for a moment, but she wasn’t sure what to say. In the two weeks since the dream, she had been trying her hardest to spend as much time as she could with her friends, and to cherish the time they had left. Today was the marking day for everyone, they would be free of high school, and Sunset couldn’t help but feel they would be parted from each other. She sat her phone back on the night stand and went to the bathroom to shower. Once she felt sufficiently cleaned, she got out and cleared the fog off the mirror. Her reflection stared at her, biting its bottom lip. She readjusted the towel she had wrapped around her and, with a sigh, quickly applied some make up. Then she looked at her hair. Rarity would no doubt be doing something just marvelous and want everyone else to do so as well. After a moments consideration, she shrugged, going about her everyday routine. It would be under the cap anyway. Once she finished in the bathroom, she walked back across the hall to her room. The dress Celestia had bought her lay draped over her desk chair. She ran her fingers over the sleek material. It was red, and strapless, falling just above her knees. She had loved it the instant she had laid eyes on it in the store. The price tag, however, had made her rethink her love. She had returned home from school one day to see it lying on her bed. She had picked it up, open mouthed, before turning to see Celestia in the doorway. “If you truly don’t like it, I’ll take it back, but you seemed enamored with it,” Celestia had said. Sunset had sat the dress back down, carefully, and walked over to Celestia, wrapping her in a hug. “Thank you,” she had whispered as Celestia returned the hug. “I love it.” Now Sunset smiled at the memory. She sat about getting dressed and finding the shoes that she was going to wear today. Looking herself over in her mirror, she nodded. Then she walked out of her room and down the hallway to get breakfast. She was met with a plate of pancakes, topped with whipped cream and freshly cute peaches. Behind the plate of food was a small gift bag. Celestia also sat at the table, just adding whipped cream to her own plate of pancakes. “Good morning!” Sunset looked between the gift and Celestia. “For me?” She sat in front of the plate and picked up her fork, her eyes never leaving the tiny bag. She cut into the pancakes, relishing in their sweet flavor. “Of course. You’re graduating. I’m not sure what that means in Equestria, but here it’s very important and a huge reason to celebrate. I’m proud of you.” Sunset suddenly found it hard to swallow her breakfast. Celestia was proud of her. While Sunset didn’t think she had done anything spectacular, it still caused a lump in her throat to hear those words. She looked up and smiled at Celestia, but said nothing. They finished their meal in silence, though Celestia kept looking at Sunset, as if she wanted to say something, but wasn’t sure that now was the right time. After another of the looks, Celestia smiled. “Well, go ahead, open the bag.” The bag was in Sunset’s grasp in a flash. She looked at Celestia, who seemed just as eager for Sunset to opened it as she was. She pulled it open and carefully removed the decorative papers to find a single key. She picked it up, holding it in her hand. “A key? I don’t get it.” Celestia seemed to deflate some, but she stood and led Sunset to the garage. Sunset nearly dropped the key. Her eyes wide, she looked over at Celestia. “A motorcycle? Seriously? You got me a motorcycle?” She moved slowly, fearful that a wrong step could activate something and she would discover this was all a dream. “I mean, a motorcycle.” She giggled as she looked it over. “It’s amazing. I…I don’t even know how to say thank you.” “I do. Be careful on it.” Celestia raised her eyebrows in an attempt to look serious, but her huge smile defeated the look. “Now come on, you’ll have time to ride it later. We’re going to be late.” Sunset ran back inside to grab what she needed to take with her, still giggling. They weren’t late, of course. Sunset didn’t think Celestia had ever been late for anything. They arrived promptly two minutes before they were due, which gave them more than enough time to walk to the gym. Despite only the faculty and staff having to arrive this early, some parents and family were already parked and waiting outside the gym doors. Celestia greeted the parents as they walked through the doors, explaining when guests would be allowed in and the procedures. Sunset walked in behind her, looking down at the rows of foldable chairs set out on the gym floor. She took a seat on the bleachers as Celestia walked to the stage and talked with the technicians. They ran through the same gambit they had the day before, making sure no wires were crossed and everything would go off without a hitch. She sighed, checking her messages again. The chat had flooded with both words and pictures as everyone was finishing and doing things with their family. Rainbow Dash had even woken up and was active. Everyone was so excited. Their last day in this building together, and they were all ready to leave it behind. If it weren’t for this school, these halls, none of them would be friends. How could they be so willing to just leave it behind? Did they even really care about her? Were they just her friends so she would ‘stay reformed?” Sunset shook her head. Those weren’t good thoughts. They weren’t true, either. Her friends loved her. She looked at her phone again and turned it on silent. It was graduation day, which meant a lot more than just leaving behind high school. Her friends could go and do what they were meant to be doing. That’s what their excitement was about, and she knew that. It just hurt to be left behind. She looked up at the stage, where Celestia and Luna were doing last minute note comparisons. They had been going over who should say what for the last two weeks. She looked around, realizing other graduating students were filling into the gym. She felt someone stomping down the bleachers and then jump, landing hard next to her. “Heya, Sunset.” She looked up to see Flash Sentry. “How are you?” She shrugged, looking back out over the empty rows of seats. “I’m fine, I guess. It’s graduation.” She put on a falsely cheery smile and spun her fingers around in mock celebration before rolling her eyes. “I’m so over it already.” Flash nodded. “I’m pretty excited. My whole family are waiting outside the gym doors to watch.” He smiled at her. “You know, I don’t think we’ve really talked since that Fall Formal.” “We haven’t.” Sunset looked over at him. “It’s been crazy, but we’re here now.” “Yeah.” Flash rubbed the back of his neck. “I wanted to say I’m sorry. I know you had other reasons for everything, but if I could have done something…” Sunset shifted on the hard bleachers. “No, there wasn’t anything. I was dead set on total world domination.” She chuckled. “You were a good friend.” Flash smiled. “Okay. Umm, I guess this is probably it, then, huh? You’ll go off to do amazing things. I’ll be at Canterlot Community.” He winked and laughed. “Be good, Sunset. And you know, you were alright, too, when you weren’t trying to drive everyone apart.” “Thanks, Flash.” He nodded and walked away, toward two other boys who were talking on the other side of the gym. She stayed seated, watching him go. The first goodbye in what was promising to be a long string of heartbreak. She looked back to the main stage, where everyone was finding their spots. Celestia stood at the podium. “Okay, graduates, if you could all follow Vice Principal Luna to the starting point, we’ll begin letting your families in.” Sunset stood and walked with the rest of the crowd through the doors side doors. She sighed, looking at her phone again. The chat was still going strong, it seemed. She opened it up to see where everyone was. She could have expected Rarity or Dash to be late, but that all of the girls were late surprised her. In fact, she was certain Twilight was supposed to have been here when she and Celestia had arrived. She opened the chat, eyes skimming the messages, looking for the smiling picture of Twilight. Near the bottom she saw where Twilight had replied again. >> Of course, my brother’s car would break down. >> Were u at twi ill come get u guys Sunset sighed. Knowing Twilight, she was near panic mode. She looked at the time stamps and nodded. They should be arriving at the school any moment. She looked around, seeing the door open and five of her six friends walking through. Rarity spotted Sunset, giving a little wave and leading the rest to her. “There you are, darling. We’ve been looking for you. You didn’t meet us out front.” “What are you talking about?” Sunset pulled out her phone, scrolling through her phone. She reached a section that was nothing but people posting her name. “Oh, sorry. I wasn’t looking.” “It’s okay. You were just unusually quiet.” Rarity reached up and adjusted the cap on Sunset’s head. “There now, perfect.” Sunset looked over the group, realizing one person still hadn’t arrived. “Where’s Twilight?” Dash laughed. “Freaking out. Vice Principal Luna cornered her the instant we walked through the doors.” At that moment, Principal Celestia and Vice Principal Luna walked in. Principal Celestia stepped forward, smiling at them. “You’re parents are all seated and it’s nearly time. Your class has been one we won’t shortly forget, but—“ Vice Principal Luna cleared her throat. With a sign, Principal Celestia nodded. “But I’ll save the speech for when you’re in your seats. For now, it’s time to go out, but first, we need you to line up.” Groans were heard as everyone shuffled to be in the right place, next to the right people. Sunset found Sandalwood and stood behind him, avoiding looking at Celestia and Luna. The students quickly called off their names so they would know they were in place. Then the doors opened and they were led out, all following Principal Celestia and Vice Principal Luna as the music began. Sunset swallowed. Several of her classmates were giving small waves and smiles, finding their families in the crowd. She was let out a breath of relief when everyone was seated. Principal Celestia was on the stage behind the podium. She started her speech, talking about how special the class seated before her was. Sunset had heard it gone over several times at home, so much so that she mouthed the words along with Celestia to the parts she knew. Vice Principal Luna gave her, thankfully shorter, speech afterwards. Then Twilight was called up. She visibly took a deep breath and stood, walking to the podium with what Sunset assumed was a practiced pace. She sat her notes down, straightened them, looked up, and smiled. “Hello, my fellow graduates. I did a lot of research on how to write the best valedictorian speech. It all said the same thing. Talk about the shared experiences you’ve had and how the four years you spent together meant a great deal and how close you’ve became and variations on that. I can’t do that” She paused for just a second. “I didn’t spend four years at Canterlot High. It feels like I only just arrived. What I do know, however, is that this school is special and especially the students graduating today.” She released her tense grip on the podium, relaxing some. “I can say that and believe it with every fiber of my being. I came and was welcomed with open arms, smiles, and laughs. When I did something excellent, I was celebrated with. When I failed, I was supported.” Trixie leaned over to Sunset and whispered, “She failed something? Did I miss it?” Sunset just smiled and shook her head, listening to her friend. “The point is, fellow graduates, I know you all have the best of humanity in you. I might be up here, giving a speech because I had the highest grade point average, but that would mean nothing if I didn’t have a whole class of friends to share it with. It would be a cold. What it comes down to is this. You’ve all faced challenges the likes of which most others haven’t, and you’ve came out on top because you band together and fight for your friends. Life is about to get really scary for all of us, so remember. Be there. Celebrate the highs, support the lows, and always, always, remember the magic of friendship.” Then Vice Principal Luna was behind the podium as Twilight scurried to take her seat next to Trixie. As the names started to be called, Twilight leaned forward and tapped Sunset on the knee. “Oh my goddess, that was stressful. Was it okay?” She looked truly worried. Sunset nodded. “It was perfect, Twilight.” Twilight beamed. “Thanks! I’m glad you’re here. We were worried.” The students in the row in front of them began to return to their seats, so their row stood, cutting off their conversation. Sunset turned and faced Sandalwood’s back. She listened and soon enough, her name was called. She walked forward, the silence deafening after the roar the families had been making for the other students. She was halfway to the stage when she heard what was unmistakably Spike’s voice. “Yeah, go Sunset!” followed by a cheer from Twilight’s family, her other friend’s families soon joining in. She grinned as she climbed the stairs to the stage, her eyes starting to tear up. She walked toward Principal Celestia, who was looking at her with a huge smile. She was handed her diploma and when she reached out to shake Principal Celestia’s hand, as they had been instructed during practice, it was bypassed for a gripping hug. “I’m so proud of you,” she whispered again, as the camera flashed, and then she was ushered off stage. She walked back to her seat as the room exploded in noise and air horns for Trixie Lulamoon. Her friend’s families had cheered. Celestia had, again, said she was proud. With all the emotion floating in the room, it was all she could do to not cry. It would all be gone in a few short weeks. Her friends would be gone, graduation a long forgotten moment, and her left with nothing. > Chapter Three > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sunset stared at the ceiling of her room, tossing a tennis ball into the air and catching it before it hit her face. It had been two weeks since graduation. Sunset had made mental list after mental list of the reasons she should stay or go, but so many different aspects kept getting in her way. She was appreciative of Celestia for letting her say while she was in high school, but she knew the custom was to move out after high school, and Sunset did not know the first thing about life on her own She had no doubt that Celestia was ready for her to leave, after giving her free room and board, and even extra money so she could do things with her friends, it was time to stand on her own. Then there was the matter of her friends. Dash and Fluttershy had already received their dorm assignments from the University of Cloudsdale, and her other friends were waiting to hear back from their first picks. None of them were going to stay in Canterlot. Sure, maybe one or two would stay together, but everyone was leaving. She threw the ball hard enough to hit the ceiling, causing it to bounce off at an angle and hit the door. With a groan, she sat up and buried her face in her hands. It wasn’t fair. Why was she left alone to deal with this? Was this her penance for tearing her friends apart when she was still mad for power? She had to watch them slowly crumble from within? She took a deep breath and stood. Her friends were leaving, going all over the country to further their education and set up their futures. This wasn’t Equestria. They didn’t start apprenticeships when they found their cutie marks. They had to work hard and forge their own path with no reassurance the path they were on was the right one. This wasn’t Equestria, and Sunset wanted it to be. She wanted to go home. She had already arranged to visit Princess Twilight for an undetermined amount of time, and the only thing to do was wait. Celestia had agreed to drive her to the portal, though it seemed to be something of an inconviencance for her. “You’re going to Equestria tomorrow?” Celestia asked. She sat down her fork. “For how long?” Sunset shrugged, pushing the salad around on her plate. “I don’t know. A while, I guess.” She looked up, meeting Celestia’s eyes. “I can walk if you don’t want to drive me. It’s no big deal. I just didn’t want to leave my bike at the school.” Celestia did not break eye contact as she looked at Sunset. It seemed a full minute passed before Celestia nodded, her shoulders falling. “I’ll drive you. Two, you said? That’s so early. Are you sure you want to go tomorrow?” “Yeah, we agreed on tomorrow, she’s expecting me.” “Very well then. Tomorrow it is. A glance at the clock showed it was nearly one. Sunset got out of bed, straightening the bedding, and looked around the room. There wasn’t much to take with her, really. She wouldn’t need any of her clothes, or her wallet, or any of the things in the room. She would leave the pictures and come for them once she had found her own place in Equestria, so she would have something to remember her friends by. The only thing that could be useful was the journal, so she picked it up, putting it into the saddle bags she had worn the first time she crossed into this world, and walked out of her bedroom and into the kitchen. Celestia sat at the table, holding a mug of tea in both hands. She looked up when Sunset walked in, a strained smile on her face. “Did you eat lunch yet?” “No. That’s the first thing Twilight put on the plan, so I was just waiting until I got home.” Sunset sat in the chair opposite her. “It’s so weird. I’m finally going home.” Celestia winced at the word, but Sunset didn’t notice. “It’s going to be so different. So much better. I’m not the same bitter person I was, grabbing for power. Maybe I can appreciate what I have now. Maybe the Princess will even forgive me, welcome me with open wings.” Sunset grinned, expecting her expression to be mirrored on Celestia’s face. Instead, she got a frown. “Well, it’s nearly time to go. Wouldn’t want to be late for your meeting with the Princess. Do you need help with your things?” Sunset furrowed her brown. “No. I won’t really need to take anything, I mean. I’ll be in Princess Twilight’s castle, and ponies don’t really wear clothes. Well, not like humans do.” “I see. So you aren’t going to take anything with you?” Celestia wasn’t looking at her now. Sunset wasn’t sure what to make of the woman. While she had studied under Princess Celestia, she had never seen the mare angry or sad or any emotion that wasn’t positive. The woman before her, however, had been through the gambit of emotions, and Sunset had witnessed them all. It had come as a shock the first time she had ever heard Celestia cry, and after that, she realized that the pony and the person were two very different people. Sunset shrugged. “I’ve got my saddle bags and the useless Equestrian bits I brought with me the first time, just stuff that I originally brought over.” “Oh.” Celestia stood, picking her keys up and walking toward the door. “It’s time.” They got into the car and Celestia pulled out, going a little faster than normal. The ride to the school was silent. Celestia kept a firm grip on the steering wheel and never looked over at Sunset once. This wasn’t the way Sunset was used to riding in the car to be. Normally it was full of talk and, often times, laughter. Maybe Celestia was ready to be rid of Sunset. It wouldn’t have surprised her any. They pulled to the side of the curb of the school, Celestia turning the car off. She took a deep breath and looked over to Sunset. “You’re sure this is what you want? To go back?” “Of course it is. Equestria is my home. Why wouldn’t I?” She looked at Celestia for a moment, and when no answer came, she got out of the car and started walking toward the portal. Just as she reached the statue, a car door slammed behind her. She turned and faced the portal, seeing Celestia walking toward her. She reached out with a hand and razed the portal, a smile tugging at her lips. She looked over to Celestia, who had caught up, and the smiled broke out. “I’m going home. Why am I so nervous?” It took a moment for Celestia to answer. “It’s been a long time since you were in Equestria for more than a few moments. Maybe things have changed. Maybe you’ve changed.” Sunset scowled. “I have changed. I’m a better person now.” She tore her eyes away from Celestia and focused on the portal. “I guess the most important thing to do is just take that first step. Thanks for taking care of me. I really do appreciate it and I do want to pay you back, eventually.” She looked back over to Celestia, whose expression she couldn’t read. “I’ll be out of your hair now, though, so it’s a win-win. Bye.” With that, she walked through the portal. She blinked as she looked around at the sparkling blues and purples. She took a step forward, and another, relishing in the sound her hooves made against the crystal floor. She heard giggling and looked around, spotting the purple alicorn watching her. “Having fun?” Sunset looked back to the mirror, but saw nothing but her own reflection. “Yeah, I’m great. I’m a pony again.” She shot a zap of blue magic toward her saddlebags, which had fallen when she walked through the mirror, and levitated them onto her back. “My magic works,” she breathed to herself. She turned to face the other mare, a grin splitting her face. “I have to say, Princess Twilight, it is good to be home.” Princess Twilight wrinkled her nose. “I know we haven’t really had a chance to discuss this, but could you maybe not call me princess? I just don’t like my friends being so formal.” Sunset nodded. “Oh, of course. In the human world, when we talk about you, we call you Princess Twilight so we don’t confuse you with the other Twilight.” “I see.” Twilight shuffled her wings. “Well, the gang is all upstairs ready for you. I did what you asked and I haven’t mentioned this to Celestia yet, but you know she is going to want to see you.” Twilight turned and led the way up the stairs. Sunset gulped but followed. Stepping through the door was a surreal experience. She saw what was clearly the pony version of all her friends, one pony that she didn’t know, and…a dragon? Everyone was staring at her expectantly. “Hi everybody. I’m Sunset Shimmer.” “Oh boy, I’ve heard so much about you!” Pinkie Pie squealed. “See, this is your welcome back party, but I also have planned a welcome to Ponyville party because I don’t think you’ve ever been to Ponyville before, and—“ “Pinkie, let her catch her breath. I’m sure it’s a big adjustment.” Rarity gave her a smile. “Perhaps you would prefer to sit and talk.” Sunset looked around at the ponies that surrounded her, unsure how she was supposed to feel. She felt like she knew these ponies, but she doubted this Rainbow Dash played soccer, or that this Fluttershy helped in animal shelters. With a smile, she nodded. “Talking sounds great.” She levitated her saddle bags off her back and sat, looking at everyone. She found the one pony she didn’t recognize, a light purple unicorn with a dark purple and bright blue mane. “How about introductions. What’s your name?” The unicorn looked at the others before looking back to Sunset. “Me?” she asked, raisnng a hoof to her chest. “I’m Starlight Glimmer.” “I don’t think we’ve met. I’m Sunset Shimmer.” Pinkie giggled. “Your names rhyme.” “And not to be rude, Sunset, but you ain’t met any of us before.” One glance at the orange earth pony and Sunset knew that was Applejack. She nodded. “Yes, I’m sorry. My friends back…in the other world. They’re strikingly similar.” “I’m not among them?” Starlight asked. The dragon rolled his eyes. “I doubt that Starlight tried to destroy Equestria by making sure the elements of harmony never met.” “Spike,” Twilight reprimanded. He gave a sheepish smile. “Heh, sorry.” “Oh, I am terribly sorry,” Rarity said, standing up. “I wanted to stay longer, Sunset, but I have a pony coming from Manehattan, so I must get to my shop. Perhaps we can do brunch some time.” With a quick smile, Rarity was out the door. “Her shop?” Sunset asked. Twilight nodded. “Yes. She’s really branching out and opening stores in all the major cities.” Sunset shifted. Opening stores? Maybe these ponies weren’t exactly like her friends after all. > Chapter Four > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Life in Equestria was exactly like Sunset had remembered it. Ponies were friendly, everything was fresher, and life moved at an absolutely abysmal pace. She had forgotten many more things than she remembered. This town even had a special hill for cloud watching. She sighed as she looked up at the balls of fluff. One floated by shaped like a duck. There was no imagination to cloud watching in Equestria either. This cloud literally looked like a baby duck, because the pegasi that were putting on the show had shaped it that way. With another sigh, she sat up. It had been nearly three weeks since she had come home, but the longer she stayed, the more dissatisfied she was. Of course, she had always been a city pony, but going to the city also meant seeing Princess Celestia, and that was something she had been attempting to put off. Until last night when Twilight had announced she was going to Canterlot. It had taken a split second remark of ‘maybe I should go with you’ and Twilight had a letter off to Celestia faster than a text message, and the deed had been done. So she was due to board a train in an hour to go meet the one mare she was terrified of meeting again. She slowly made her way to the train station. Slowly, not for lack of trying to be fast, but slowly because everyone in Ponyville seemed intent on stopping and having a conversation with her. At least in Canterlot she knew she would from point a to point b without so much hassle. She finally arrived at the train station, where Twilight was looking around anxiously, while Spike and Starlight looked bored. When Twilight saw Sunset, her ears perked up and she smiled. “There, I thought you were going to miss the train.” Sunset shook her head. “I had considered it, but it’s probably best if I talk to her.” She swallowed and looked around. “So, how long do we have to wait on the train?” As if on cue, the rattling of the rails and distant sounds of a train could be heard. “Not long.” Starlight stood, closing the book she had been reading and putting it in her saddlebags. The train pulled into the station, the metal squealing. Sunset folded her ears down. That was one noise she hadn’t missed while away from Equestria. A few ponies filed off the train, going to retrieve luggage and finding the ponies they were meeting. Then it was clear for the passengers to board. Spike sat on Twilight’s back as she led the way to a compartment. “This should do,” she said as she walked in, taking a seat next to a window. Spike walked over and took the seat opposite Twilight and next to the door, opening the first of a small stack of comics Twilight levitated to him. Sunset followed her in, taking the other window seat, leaving Starlight to sit next to Twilight. The compartment was silent. Twilight had pulled out a book to read, as had Starlight, and Sunset hadn’t thought to bring one. She sighed, looking out the window. The train lurched forward, and the scenery finally began changing. It opened from the station to the surrounding town, to the undeveloped open fields, to farm land, and then they started going up. Twilight put her book down and sighed. “So, you’re due to meet both Princess Celestia and Princess Luna at four, which gives us just enough time to put our saddlebags in our rooms.” She looked at Sunset. “Do you remember how to get to the audience chambers?” The audience chambers. They were supposed to be near the throne room, but it also depended on what level of guest Princess Celestia considered Sunset. “Maybe. You aren’t going to be there?” Twilight shook her head. “No, Celestia asked that she meet with you alone, first.” “Oh.” Sunset swallowed and looked out the window, unable to decide if meeting alone was good or bad. The castle was more imposing that Sunset remembered. All gold and white, it practically radiated. Her companions didn’t give it a second glance, trotting up the steps and to the doors. Sunset felt awestruck. She had once been just as oblivious to the grandeur of the building, but now, after being away for years, she saw what she had given up. She kept up, barely, taking everything in. They passed guards who smiled and nodded to Twilight and Spike. It seemed like not much had changed since she had left, but the atmosphere was different. She took a deep breath. Perhaps it wasn’t the castle atmosphere that had changed, but the change Sunset had undergone that allowed her to see the palace with a new perspective. She was so lost in thought that she hadn’t realized Twilight had stopped walking. She bumped into her, smiling sheepishly when Twilight glanced back. “Sorry.” “It’s okay.” Twilight pointed to a door. “Your meeting awaits.” Sunset stepped forward, resting a hoof on the door. She took a deep breath and looked over at the other two mares. “It’ll be okay. She is really looking forward to seeing you.” Sunset nodded, looking forward at the door again. “Okay, I can do this.” With one last glance at the reassuring smiles of her friends, she opened the door and walked in. The door closed quietly behind her. She stopped just over the threshold, her heart beating fast. Before her sat Princess Celestia, her mane flowing and a warm smile on her face. “Sunset Shimmer,” she began. “Princess,” Sunset said, bowing quickly before looking back up. She had practiced what she would say, but now her words left her. She took a tentative step forward, and another, until she was close to the monarch. They looked at each other for a few moments, Sunset only hearing her own breaths. Why wasn’t Celestia saying anything? Was she at as much of a loss for words as Sunset was? Was she trying to find the best way to express her anger and disappointment? Sunset took a deep breath, lowering her front half into a full bow, prostrating herself before Princess Celestia. “I’m so sorry. I messed up. I wanted nothing but power and influence, and I wasn’t going to stop until I got it.” She stopped when she felt feathers brushing her back. “Rise, Sunset.” Slowly, Sunset got to her hooves and looked up into Princess Celestia’s face. “You were forgiven long ago. I’m am glad to see you’re alright.” The wings that had stroked her back now pulled her closer to the Princess. “I worried about you and how you were doing.” “I did alright. I’ve been better recently than ever before. Even if I do still have a lot to make up for.” She took a deep breath. “I’m surprised you haven’t thrown me in the dungeon or something. I stole a crown and tried to topple your reign.” Celestia smiled. “Perhaps, but I believe you’ve shown that you aren’t that pony anymore.” Sunset scuffed her hoof along floor. “No, I’m not. But I can’t forget what I’ve done.” “Sunset,” Celesia said, her wing under Sunset’s chin forcing their eyes to meet. “Did I ever tell you the story of my sister?” Her horn lit up and she sent a tendril of magic to pull on a rope causing a bell to chime. Sunset shook her head. “Luna? No, but I met her in the other world. I was so surprised. Twilight has told me a little.” The door to the chamber opened, catching both Celestia and Sunset’s attention. In walked a dark blue alicorn who’s flowing mane twinkled like the stars. Wordlessly she made her way over and sat next to Sunset. Sunset bowed to her as well. “Princess Luna.” “Hello, Sunset. I have heard much about you.” Luna smiled. “It seems we share a past that is not dissimilar.” Sunset raised her eyebrows, looking at Luna. “You wanted to tear down Equesria piece by piece with zombified human teenagers because you couldn’t become an all-powerful princess at twelve years old?” “No, I wanted to topple Celestia and rule, never letting the sun rise above the horizon again.” She looked down. “I did many terrible things then, worse that what you could ever dream.” With a sigh, Princess Luna looked up. “I have learned, however, that I need to remember that is not the goal of me today.” Sunset laid a hoof on Princess Luna’s shoulder. “I’ve learned to forgive myself. I don’t need this speech or for either of us to relive unpleasant memories.” She looked between Princess Luna and Princess Celestia. “I know I’m not who I used to be.” “Oh.” Princess Luna looked at Princess Celestia for a moment. “In that case, perhaps I should make certain Twilight Sparkle and Starlight Glimmer are settling in.” She stood and walked out the door, leaving an awkward silence between Sunset and Princess Celestia. After a moment, Sunset sighed. “Thank you for trying.” “You have grown, more than I had expected. It seems the other world was very good for you.” Princess Celestia looked down, her serene smile on her face. “Perhaps you would like to again take up your studies?” Take up her studies? Go back to being a student, and learning under the Princess? It made since. Her friends were all going to further their educations, and this was the best way for Sunset to do so as well. Why didn’t the offer fill her with the happiness she thought it should. Instead, she found herself shaking her head. “I don’t think so, Princess. I—I just graduated. And there isn’t…I love magic, and I still love studying magic, but I wouldn’t even know where to begin. I was about to start my own personal research when I ran away. I could do that at college.” Princess Celestia blinked. “College?” Sunset nodded. “The other world…the other world is not dissimilar to Equestria, much in the same way that I’m not dissimilar to Princess Luna. That is, it isn’t all that much alike, other than superficial facts.” Sunset smiled. “There the weather isn’t controlled. There are ways to talk to people on the other side of the world. You can travel in a motorized carriage and travel further quicker than even the Equestrian train system can get you. It’s…” She looked up at the Princess, her smile fading. “It’s really wonderful.” Princess Celestia smiled, looking down at Sunset. “Tell me more.” The train ride home the next day was quiet again, but Sunset didn’t mind. She was lost in her thoughts. Equestria really hadn’t changed all that much from when she had left, but Sunset had had changed. She had changed a lot. More than that, talking with Princess Celestia, she realized this wasn’t where she really wanted to be. “Two bits for your thoughts?” Twilight asked, causing her to jump. She looked at her and shrugged. “I’ve been thinking about my future. Celestia asked me to be her student again.” Twilight grinned and leaned forward. “She did? That’s great!” Holding up a hoof, Sunset shook her head. “No, it isn’t. I don’t want to be her student again. I want to do something that means something. I want to help people. Ponies. Whatever. And there isn’t really a lot of that to do in Equestria. It’s such an amazing world.” Sunset shuffled her hooves, looking down. “I was dying to come back here after graduation. And now…” Starlight laid a hoof on Sunset’s shoulder. “Now you don’t want to be?” Looking between Twilight and Starlight, Sunset sighed. “I…I was a kid. It isn’t the same. I guess I grew up. This isn’t home. Not anymore.” She sighed again, chuckling. “All I want to do is be with the people I care about most. I’m just running away because I think it’s hard. And I should stop.” She looked up, a confident smile on her face. “I’m going back. I’m going home.” > Chapter Five > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sunset sat before the mirror. Twilight sat beside her, holding three new journals in her magic. “You’re sure about this?” Sunset nodded, reaching out for the books. “Okay then.” Twilight placed the books in Sunset’s outstretched hoof. Sunset walked forward, looking back to Twilight. “Thanks for letting me stay. It really helped.” “Come back anytime you want, Sunset.” With a deep breath, Sunset turned back toward the mirror and stepped through. It was late evening, the sun falling behind the horizon. The books clattered to the ground as Sunset fell to her knees. With a groan, she stood and looked around. There weren’t any people on the streets outside, and but there were a few cars in the school parking lot. One she recognized as belonging to Celestia. She turned and made her way into the school. If the teachers were there, it meant it was already late July. The school was quiet, Sunset’s footsteps resounding off the walls. It didn’t take her long to find the main office and walk through, the secretary nodding to her as she walked past the desk and back toward where Celestia’s office was. Sunset stopped at the door, her heart thudding. Celestia had been free from her for over a month. She had her life back, without a teenager to take care of. Would she even want to see Sunset again? The decision was made for her when the door opened. Celestia’s mouth dropped open, her eyes wide. “Sunset?” she whispered, reaching out slowly and cupping the girl’s cheek with her hand. The stack of papers Celestia had been holding fell freely as Sunset was pulled into the tightest hug she ever remembered being in. She wrapped her arms around Celestia as well. Then she heard a sniff. “Are you crying?” Sunset whispered. Celestia pulled away from the hug, leaving her hands on Sunset’s shoulders. There were tears in her eyes and smudged mascara on her cheeks. “You came back,” she said. A grin broke across her face and she shook her head in disbelief. “I thought I’d never see you again.” She pulled her in for another hug, this one just as bone-crushingly tight. Sunset let herself relax into the hug. After another few moments, Celestia pulled away, wiping under her eyes. “I’m sorry.” Sunset just looked at her. This reaction was more than she had even dared hoped for. Celestia sniffed again, letting out a small giggle. She bent to pick up the papers she had dropped and the door to Luna’s office opened. “Did I actually hear a... giggle? Sunset Shimmer?” Luna stepped forward, her eyebrows raised. Sunset looked between the two women, Celestia still kneeling down and picking up papers, but looking happier than Sunset ever recalled seeing her, and Luna, looking a mixture of cross and happy. “Um, would it be okay if I stayed with you again?” Sunset asked. This entire interaction had thrown her off her planned apology for having to ask again. “I know it’s a hassle…” “No.” Celestia stood, shaking her head. Sunset felt her heart fall to the pit of her stomach, but then Celestia was hugging her again. “You aren’t a hassle, Sunset. I don’t know why you say that. Of course you can come back home.” She pulled away again, holding Sunset’s hands. “You were never in my hair. You don’t have to pay me back. I’m just happy you’re here.” A warmth spread through Sunset’s chest. She looked up at Celestia, thinking of everything that had happened since coming to stay with the woman. “I just thought you…were taking pity on me.” Luna scoffed. “Pity, Sunset, does not look like that. You’re our family.” Luna laid a hand on Sunset’s shoulder. “You are back and not just here to say goodbye, right?” Sunset grinned. “Yes. Equestria…that isn’t where I belong. I wanted to come home. I…I can, can’t I?” She bit her lip, looking back to Celestia. Celestia’s laughter echoed around the hall. “You can always come home.” She reached a hand out and smoothed Sunset’s hair down again. “Come on, we’ll get dinner and talk. Luna?” Luna shook her head, looking between the two. “No, I think you two should go alone.” Celestia nodded, a grin still plastered to her face. She wrapped an arm around Sunset’s shoulders as they walked out of the office. The car ride was so unlike any car ride Sunset had ever taken with Celestia. The woman kept looking at her and smiling. “Where would you like to eat?” “How about Water’s Edge?” Sunset suggested. Celestia nodded. The car was silent again, but not uncomfortably so, like the last time. After a moment, she looked at Celestia. “You haven’t gotten rid of my clothes yet, have you? I’d hate have to spend more money on them. Honestly, this nudity taboo is senseless.” “Oh, Sunset.” Celestia sighed, pulling over to the side of the rode and shutting off the car. She turned and looked at Sunset. “What can I do to make you see you are important to me? I have all of your things still. Do you think I wanted you to go to Equestria?” She reached out and held Sunset’s hand. “No, I didn’t. I wanted you to stay here, for us to be a family. I love you, and to let you walk away like that killed me.” Sunset blinked. “I...then…why didn’t you say something?” She looked down at their hands. “I knew you were being really nice to me, and I really felt, you know, safe and taken care of and stuff, but I thought that was just you, being nice.” Sunset swallowed and took a breath, looking up at Celestia. “I would have still gone, but…I know you’re different than Princess Celestia. I guess I just thought you handled poor little orphans the same way she did. Give them a place to stay and a good education and send them on their way to be model citizens. I…” She shook her head. “I don’t know what to say.” “I didn’t want to hold you back.” Celestia met Sunset’s eyes with a sad smile. “You aren’t the typical teenager. You don’t even really know if you’re a teenager or not, right? I didn’t want to stop you from doing what you really wanted. If that was going to Equestria, then I wasn’t going to get in your way.” She took a deep breath. “I just wanted you to be happy.” They sat there for a moment in silence. Then Celestia smiled at Sunset. “I will always want you around, Sunset. Don’t ever thing otherwise.” She turned back to the wheel and started the car, pulling onto the road. Pinkie had, as predicted, thrown a party. Her friends were ecstatic upon her return. The music was still going strong, but the punch and cookies were nearly gone. She looked around her kitchen, since the party was hosted at Celestia’s house. She sat at the table, watching Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie dancing together. Everyone was in their pajamas and the clock said it was nearly one in the morning. Someone yawned close to her, and Sunset turned to see Twilight leaning against the table beside her. “If you’re sleepy, you can go on to bed. Fluttershy, Applejack, and Rarity already have.” Twilight shook her head, her eyes on Rainbow Dash and Pinkie. “No. I wanted to talk to you.” “Ah, well, grab a chair.” Sunset pointed to the seat across from her, but Twilight pulled a chair over to sit next to Sunset. She didn’t say anything for a few minutes, still watching the pair of friends dancing. “I don’t know how they have so much energy.” “Me either,” Sunset said, shaking her head. Twilight yawned again. “I’m not going to bed,” she said preemptively. “I want to talk about college.” Sunset groaned. “Twilight. It’s late July. No school is going to accept my application.” Twilight have a nervous giggle. “About that. I might have applied to Cloudsdale for you.” Twilight held her hand up. “I know, I know, but I really wanted you to go. I felt a little bad afterward. You were accepted, but your letter didn’t come until after you left. It had Celestia really excited until I told her.” She bit her lip, looking over at Sunset. “Anyway, we’re roommates, if you’d like to go.” “Wait.” Sunset furrowed her brow, confused. “Roommates? You’re going to Cloudsdale, too?” Twilight shrugged. “Everyone is? It’s an undergrad degree. Sure, we could all go to separate schools, but we could all go to this one and stay together for a while. Most of us are going go further than a bachelor’s degree anyway, so really, why not have fun with this first one?” Sunset sat for a moment before nodding. “Okay. I’ll go.” Twilight beamed. “Great. Now—“ Suddenly the music shut off, much to the disappointment of Dash and Pinkie. Celestia stood by the record player, looking at the girls. “As much as I’d love for this party to continue, some of us have to be awake early in the morning. Why don’t you girls go on to bed. You’ll have all day tomorrow to have another party.” Both sporting huge yawns, Dash and Pinkie nodded and ran up the stairs. Sunset was about to follow when Twilight spoke. “Um, Prin—I mean, Celestia?” “Yes, Twilight?” Twilight shoved Sunlight forward. “I think Sunset has some news she wants to share.” Celestia perked up, eyebrows raised. “Oh?” Rubbing the back of her neck, Sunset shrugged. “Twilight and I were talking and I think it would be a good idea for me to go to the University of Cloudsdale?” “Oh, that’s wonderful, Sunset.” Celestia smiled, walking over and giving her a hug. “I think that’s a great idea.” Twilight yawned again, and Sunset laughed. “I think we’d better get to sleep, though. Goodnight.” “Goodnight, Sunset. I love you.” Sunset looked over to Celestia, smiling. “I love you, too.”