A Microphelia driven story about Humanity in Equestria. After an anomoly on Earth, Human kind is transfered to the land of Equestria. Too small to be noticed, they are forced to survive a world literally too big for them.
Humans are gone from the Earth, and have found themselves in the unfortunate position of waking up in Equestria. No, not Equus the planet, but Equestria the country. How, might you ask, can a race that consists of billions of people all live in one country? Well, that my dear readers, is a very good question.
Disclaimer: This story contains Microphelia content, sex, and violence. It is not for the feint of heart and, in fact, if you aren't a fan of Vore, Giant Ponies, Clop, and some pretty gruesome scenes I highly recommend you find something else to read. This is not going to be a pleasant read for you.
Anyway, to those of you who stayed, I hope you enjoy.
It was a normal day when the world ended. People talked amicably amongst themselves, drove to work, did their chores--et cetera et cetera. When magic appeared on Earth, it was quick. A bright, shining blast that reached from one end of the globe to the next. It was as beautiful as it was damning. Within the span of a moment--without even having a chance to understand how or why--humanity was extinct. Every man, woman, and child all gone in the blink of an eye.
But, the fate of humankind did not end there. We human's are tenacious, and perhaps it was because of that tenacity--that determination, that we survived. In hindsight, that might not have been such a good thing...
Equestria, a place where Friendship and Love were power. Where Ponies of all walks, or trots, of life lived in relative Harmony with one another. Race, gender, species and culture rarely effected the communities. From the smallest of animals to the most regal of ponies, everyone had a role to play, and everyone was valued as part of the whole. It was, despite the occasional chocolate rain or bug pony invasion, a paradise. But for humanity, who had just recently been ripped from the very fabric of their reality, it was anything but.
At first, there was panic. "Where are we?!" cried some. "What happened?" cried others. We'll get to each of them in due time; Equestria, you see, is a very big place. And for one very confused group their questions would never be answered. This chapter, brief as it is, is their life as Humans in Equestria.
"What the fuck happened" Daniel wasn't a very interesting man on earth. Picture him as you would the most normal of people, a person so boring that you forget their face the moment you see it. "Where am I...? Chloe? Chloe, can you hear me?!"
She wasn't there, and thus she could not hear him. Pity.
"Shut up, damnit... I'm trying to sleep." Ah, Robert. He was a bum, plain and simple. By gambling, drinking, and simple poor life choices he wound up on the street. And he wasn't very nice, and he smelt bad and--well, suffice it to say he was unpleasant. The man's words were like fire in Daniel They were in a forest of some sort; tall, green, and thin trees reached into the skies like skyscrapers, while the ground seemed more mountainous; boulders were scattered everywhere, and there was hardly any light.
"Sleep?!" Daniel screamed. "You're trying to sleep?! We're in God knows where, my wife is missing, and you're telling me to shit up because you're trying to sleep?!"
That god Robert's attention. He opened his eyes, and with a gasp realized he wasn't in Kansas anymore--or wherever he was from, I don't actually know--.
"Where the fuck am I...?"
"Where the... Chloe! Where are you! Oh, please tell me you're alright..."
The two, oblivious to their current predicament, continued on like this for a few minutes more. They were so preoccupied with their problems that they failed to notice the biggest on; it started as a rumbling in the distance, then a subtle shift in the ground. In all fairness, even if Robert and Daniel did know what was happening, it would have already been too late to avoid it.
The rumbling quickly evolved into explosions, the ground shook so much that the humans were unable to keep their footing, and in one moment--one brief, yet unfathomably long moment, they saw their death. Above the canopy of the strange forest, a large dark grey hoof consumed their vision, and within that tortuously long second, it fell on the both of them, crushing them into the earth before once again lifting into the air and repeating this action, as the renowned pony Octavia Melody walked through her lawn to check the mail.
And those two were not the only humans to meet such an unfortunate fate; in Canterlot, a group of five found themselves in a hay-seat, where they were subsequently sat on and smooshed. In the Crystal Empire, a man, separated from his family, woke from his daze in a Flugalhorn, where he was given quite an abysmal musical end. It was awful, the music, but nopony wanted to say anything. Oh, and lets not forget the group of twenty who found themselves in a toilet--I don't believe I need to tell you what happened to them, poor souls.
You see in this world humanity existed in all different sizes. Some were so small that they hardly reached the knee of their peers, while others were only as tall as an ant. Divided, broken, and far too small to be noticed, humankind must forge a new life in a world much, much too big for them. Even when they, themselves, are a threat to each other.
Huh, I'm getting the strangest sense of Deja Vu here. Well, no matter; two days have passed since humankind arrived in Equestria, and so far they were having a tough go of it. Whether they were eaten, stepped on, sat on, or worse, it was as apparent to all but the most dimwitted among them that they were no longer on top. Still, human kind was nothing if not stubborn, and it was in the home of a certain mint colored mare by the name of Lyra Heartstrings that we'll see just how far that determination went.
Originally, there were ten in the group of humans living in that particular part of Lyra's home. But whether by hoof fall, the elements, or simply disappearing, that number was quickly reduced to two--a Boy, and a Girl. Their names really weren't all that important, so we'll just refer to them by their genders.
"We're almost there..." grunted the girl. For some reason, after seeing the hoof of Lyra looming above them the night before, the Girl had come up with an idea that intellectually amounted to running in front of a train with your arms flailing in the air while screaming "I am the Queen, and you shall not pass!"
This idea--still terrible, by the way-- was to climb the leg of the nearby table so that, when the Giant sat back in its chair, the two humans could get her attention. The Boy agreed, and without wasting any more time the two began to climb. Now just to put this into perspective, that table leg was larger than a skyscraper. I have no idea how they got as high up as they did, and personally I think it might be best to just not think about it, but heedless of probability our two protagonists have just about reached the top in... lets see, seventeen, eighteen hours?
It should come as no surprise that their muscles were screaming at them. Their bodies--dehydrated and sore from the exertion--felt as if they were going to give out at any second. It was all they could do to just keep going, to keep the determination to live alive.
"Do you really think It will notice us?" The Boy was skeptical of the plan the Girl had made--after all, what did they really know about the giant? They didn't know if it was kind or cruel, male or female, or even if it spoke the same language. They were acting purely on hope at this point.
"It has too." replied the Girl, "It just has too..." It wasn't a very strong argument. In fact, it was probably the worst from a logical, emotional, metaphorical, and other words ending with -al standpoint. Bah, it is so hard to be unbiased when you have to Narrate such stupidity. Lets cut to another perspective, shall we?
From the perspective of Ms. Heartstrings, this was actually a fairly routine day. The Unicorn trotted about her house, musical numbers and ideas buzzing through her mind with every step until she eventually began to hum them to herself. She put a kettle on the stove for her morning Tea, opened the windows to let the cool winter air flow through her house, and set a plate at the table for her breakfast, all while humming a happy little tune.
How many humans do you think she killed just going about her morning routine? Remember, the Boy and Girl weren't the only ones in Lyra's home, just the only ones in that particular area. Anyone know the answer? No? Well, I do--I also know that Lyra had no knowledge of the two people standing on top of her plate, waving their hands and screaming for her attention.
You see? Standing in front of a train with their arms flailing. Now that I see it its actually rather amusing, though. They're trying so hard, but going about it completely the wrong way.
"That was and amazing way to wake up. Thanks for that, Lyra." Oh yes, Bon Bon was there too. She appeared from the upstairs bedroom; her coat, mane, and tail still wet from her morning shower.
"Thanks for returning the favor." laughed Lyra as her horn glowed with the golden color of her magic, "I'm so glad we decided to become roommates. Hey, you hungry? I was just about to make breakfast. "
"I wish I could, but I have to get to work. Hey, I'll see you tonight?"
"Sure thing!"
It was sex, by the way. Both mares were currently in heat, and there was really only one way to deal with that. It was oral, if I'm not mistaken... Just thought I would take the mystique out of that for you.
Anyway, as Bon Bon left the house, Lyra went about making her breakfast. First was the bread, obviously, which she gently placed on her plate. Then she levitated over a few Daffodils and Daisies, some lettuce and tomatoes, and a jar of Mayonnaise; each ingredient being added after the other. She wasn't aware that somewhere in the porous, grain-based surface of her bread two alien creatures were currently struggling not to become an extra flavor.
To the Girl and Boy, the bread was a labyrinthine hellscape of canyons, craters, and fibers only visible because of the faint amount of light shining through the holes.. Each subtle movement of the bread, whether it was from the plate moving or a knife smearing mayonnaise over its top, subjected the humans to tremor after tremor in their dark, sweet smelling prison.
Finally, they realized how terrible their idea was. The Boy had suggested they climb onto her plate, so that when she looked down to fill it Lyra would see the two of them. Perhaps it was the fatigue, or perhaps he truly was an idiot, either way the plan failed miserably. They tried to escape, of course; they weren't able to squeeze under the bread, so instead they opted to climb towards the light in hopes that they could reach the top of the slice and escape from there.
A few seconds in, and said light was blocked by flowers, before being replaced by the magic of Lyra's horn.
"You, my friend, are going to just what I need." Licking her lips, sitting in a rather uncomfortable looking position in her chair, the mare didn't hesitate to take a healthy bite of her sandwich. The tastes melded perfectly on her tongue as she masticated the meal into an indistinguishable mush, and with a drink from her tea she sent it sliding down her pony gullet and into her waiting belly below.
The two Humans could hear and feel their world breaking apart. Each bite brought with it a deafening crunch, each piece of the sandwich that was torn free caused the bread to shift and warp, blocking any hopes of the two from escaping. Tomato juices began to seep into the bread, drenching the two in its delectable flavor.
The Girl was the first to go. Without any time to prepare, Lyra's mouth closed over her section of bread and tore it from the rest. The smell of her breath was the first thing the Girl noticed; a cloying mix of morning breath and mint toothpaste, combined with the peppermint tea and the bitter smell of chewed up daffodils and daisies--with a musky overtone that the Girl wouldn't have recognized even if she were in a state of mind where she could.
It was the smell of Bon Bon's marehood, by the way. Sorry, but I feel its best to just come out and say it.
The Girl's lungs actively rebelled against the miasma; every breath she took of the stale, humid air of Lyra's maw was immediately forced back out. It wasn't nearly as bad to those more adequately sized, and may have even been pleasant, but to those forced to endure it in the same manner the Girl had? It was anything but.
It didn't help that the large slimy muscle of Lyra's tongue lifted, threw, and smashed the Girl and sandwich around her mouth, her screams of fear and despair being drowned out by the wet sloshing and gnashing of her teeth. Honestly, it was only by sheer luck that she avoided being grinded into a bloody pulp by motions of the mare's jaw.
It didn't take long at all before she was coated head to toe in the pony's spit--but even worse than that, gallons of the thick, viscous fluid found their way down the Girl's throat and into her own belly. Even if she spit it up, it was only a matter of time before more of the foul tasting liquid forced its way back in.
For briefest of seconds the motions stopped, and the Girl, in her foolishness hoped that meant her suffering was at an end.
It wasn't. The tongue swept across Lyra's mouth, gathering up all mashed up bits of food--and human--to its center before sending it down to her stomach with an ear shattering 'gulp'.
The Girl could only scream as she was pulled into the mare's esophagus. The powerful muscles took charge and, within a few seconds, both Girl and food was send free falling into the chamber that was the pony's belly. The smell... it was incomprehensible. It was the smell of vomit, of peppermint and flowers mingled with the musky scent of Bon Bon, all amplified by a million. It was stuffy, humid, and the heat was like being trapped in an oven.
The Girl landed in a growing sea of acid, tea, and mush, the only sound she could hear being the gurgling and sloshing of the stomach as it digested its meal, accompanied by the thump-thump of Lyra's heartbeat. It was as if the musical pony's body was giving the Girl some sick orchestra for her demise.
Earth horses may not have been able to digest meat, but in Equestria ponies ate rocks. Rocks! Honestly, I don't even want to know how acidic their stomachs would be to be able to process that! Regardless, the Girl was quickly swallowed up in acid and digested alongside the rest of the meal, even as more and more fell into the chamber, while outside Lyra gave a satisfied sigh and finished her cup of tea.
With that out of the way, she grabbed her lyre and her saddlebags and, with a pep in her step, trotted outside to Ponyville proper.
Oh, I almost forgot about the Boy. Well, as Lyra made her way through town--once more humming the tune she was no certain she would be playing-- the Boy was actually trapped beneath her tongue. Though unable to escape then bread, the Boy had more time to prepare for the inevitable than the Girl had. When the Lyra took her next bite he wasted no time in jumping behind her teeth. He had hoped that by doing so, he would avoid being swallowed like his brief companion was, and that eventually he would have a chance to slip past her lips while she was talking.
He endured tidal waves of saliva, the battering of the tongue as it constantly hit him from above, and the blistering heat of the tea as it washed over him before vanishing down her throat. He was in rough shape, and between the chewing and humming his eardrums were close to bursting, but more importantly than that he was alive.
And not simply content with floating around in a pool of spit, the Boy decided it was time to make his move. He was weak, and his movement sluggish, but ever so slowly he pulled himself up to her gums and began to climb the back of her teeth. His lungs burned for proper air, not the reeking stench of this pony's breath.
Sadly, his plans for escape weren't meant to be. Before he could make it so much as half way through, a deafening explosion of sound roared through Lyra's mouth. His body was smashed mercilessly against the back of the mare's tooth, before falling back into the now much larger pool of liquid. The Boy couldn't even manage a breath of anything before once more being struck by the now flailing tongue.
"Thank you! I just thought of the song today. Come back tomorrow, I'm sure I'll have another one." Lyra offered her best grin to the other pony, who naturally returned it in kind, before once more going back to her lyre. Unfortunately, the Boy's attempt at escape had brought some awareness of his presence to the unaware mare, but not in the way he had hoped.
It was mostly subconscious, her tongue prodding and lifting the speck from beneath it before shifting it between her teeth. Lyra had thought the Boy a grain from her meal, and dealt with it as any pony would. As her teeth fell upon it, she correctly thought she tasted the coppery hint of blood, but it was soon overpowered by the natural flavors of her mouth.
The human's remains were swallowed, all the while Lyra continued to hum and play for the enjoyment of others.
Starlight Glimmer was a good pony. While she may have once enslaved a town of ponies with brainwashing, threats, and other unsavory means, as well as altering the timeline to the extent that many futures involved some unspeakable horror unleashed upon the land in a wave of misery and death, it turned out that she was simply misunderstood.
She was a horrible pony, but now she's not. I find it best to just accept that and move on.
Currently, the reformed mare was walking into the Castle library along with Twilight and Spike to hear the story: A Hearth's Warming Tail. To those of you wondering about the order of things-how long humanity has been in Equestria and all that--I'd highly suggest you not try and overthink things. Perhaps Humans arrived in Equestria at different times, perhaps it was close to Hearth's Warming to begin with, or perhaps I just don't know the proper progression of storytelling and am narrating whatever the hell I feel like.
The second one is right, if you must know. It's only been a week or two since humanity arrived, with casualties already in the thousands. I could give you a rough estimate, but right now there are about thirty people in the unfortunate position of being where Starlight's pink gigantic rump is about to land, and quite frankly I'm more interested in that story than pie charts detailing the steady decline of the human population. Ahem~
To call the collection of humans a group would have been so inaccurate that it would border on a lie. Before the group of thirty found themselves on the cushion of a chair, they had made a rather decent home for themselves on the nearby coffee table. Its a well-known fact that Princess Twilight, when hungry, is a slob of surprising proportions. The group survived by eating the crumbs of her meals and collecting the water from the glasses that were left on the table. Specifically those little rings that are left behind when you don't use a coaster, the ones that you've probably been yelled at for at some point in your life for leaving.
All that changed earlier in the day. Spike, at the behest of Twilight, had placed a collection of books at the center of the table. The displacement of air was so great, that it sent the group flying into the aforementioned chair, but more importantly leaft them scattered.
A few hours later, and they didn't even have so much as a warning that Starlight Glimmer was about to sit down. Collectively, there wasn't a one that was even as tall as an ant, and one of the unfortunate side effects to being so small was that their eyes didn't work like one would expect. To them, the chair cushion was a limitless expanse of rolling fibers, stretching out endlessly into the horizon. The fatal downside to this new sight was that they didn't see Starlight's rump until it was already on top of them.
Not a single person found themselves in a favorable position as the mare settled in for her Hearth's Warming tale, and that went doubly so for the unfortunate many who found themselves at ground zero of butt-fall. The majority of the group--let’s say, sixteen or so people-- were simply crushed by the massive wall of fur and flesh that made up Starlight's flank. One or two wound up in tangled in her tail, three people were in the absolute wrong place at the wrong time, both literally and figuratively, and were embarrassingly crushed beneath her tail hole. Unbeknownst to Starlight Glimmer, the force of her weight hitting the chair cushion caused it to... poof, for lack of a better word.
It caused the cushion to shift, to conform to the shape of her rear. For her, this meant she would be more comfortable. For the little humans that survived beneath her, however, it made for a trampoline of G-Forces that sent them flying into some very embarrassing places.
The survivors soon found themselves lost in--and around--the vast, country sized expanse of Starlight's Marehood. Honestly, there isn't much to say regarding those clinging to the outskirts of the giant mare's lips that couldn't be better explained by describing the unlucky few were were sent into its opening instead out outside of it.
To them, the idea of Hell was made all too real. The smell that pervaded the air was a pungent, musky odor that seemed to stick to their walls of their lungs. Each gasp of breath brought with it Starlight's unique flavor; it coated their tongues and their throats, men and woman were both forced to endure the indescribably taste as a blistering, muggy heat radiated from every surface.
"Is... is there anyone else in here?" A woman, just an inch or so beneath the pony's heart shaped clit called out. She thought she heard someone call back from deeper in, and whether by stupidity or braver she slowly began to climb further into the mare. She had made friends with these people, bonded with them, if she could save even one from that horrible place than it would be enough. She was one of the smaller humans there, but was probably one of the kindest. I wouldn't hold out hope for that one, if I were you.
If we were to look further down, closer to Starlight's plot, we'd find a man stuck to the walls of the giant mare's sex by a slimy substance he really didn't want to think about. For those of you unfamiliar with the anatomy of the vagina, there was a thin layer of mucus that coats the walls to keep it damp. It was perfectly normal for the same to be said about Starlight's--it was healthy, even. Unfortunately for the man, he was incredibly tiny, and like a bug caught in a web he was left at the mercy of simple biology.
It is worth noting in this scenario that Starlight Glimmer was a very animated talker, and in her mentioning to Twilight that she was doing her Pinkie Pie voice, her hips moved in just the right way that the small opening the man had slipped through closed, tragically smothering him in the moist, hot depths.
There were only two or three other people left within Starlight's loins, either stuck to the moisture of the mare's depths or desperately trying to crawl out. Those outside were much safer; the smell and heat were still there, but it was muted and bearably. They had fur they could grab a hold of and use to climb or hold steady while the giant mare moved. A few of them had even managed to reach the cushion, and without wasting any time proceeded to run as fast as they could as far from the pony as possible.
There was one depraved soul, however, that chose to venture deeper into her depths, regardless of the fact that it was a death wish. If I may speak freely here, I find that last one particularly disturbing, and hope beyond hope that when they were a community he was never given any position of power. Take this to heart; even when the odds are stacked against you, when teamwork is essential and your entire culture and race is shattered beyond repair, there will always be that one person who thinks, for some insane reason or another, that climbing inside of a giant pony's vagina is a good idea.
Eventually, the Hearth's Warming story ended. Starlight took the Tale's message to heart, and without wasting any more of the holiday she hopped from her seat and trotted out to the party proper. For her, it was as if a weight had been lifted from her shoulders. But for those trapped under her tail, the Hell they were struggling to survive in only got worse. It was as if the world itself shifted; Gravity reasserted itself and those who were climbing down, such as the girl, soon found themselves falling into the fleshy walls beneath them. On the plus side, they didn't need to climb anymore. The new position granted them the ever taken for granted ability to walk again.
The downside was the motion of Starlight's swagger made it very hard for them to keep their footing. The Girl who went back was the most unfortunate victim of this; it was still very dark between Starlight's hind legs, and while trying to keep her balance the girl, not able to see where she was going, accidentally fell. She wasn't lucky enough to fall outside of the mare's body though, but down a certain... hole that rested just short ways away from the clitoris. I'll take the suspense and guesswork out of it and just go ahead and tell you that she fell into Starlight's Urethra. She survived the fall, landing only with a wet "thud" somewhere down below and a dazed state to show for her misfortune.
Up above, those who were stuck had no chance of escape, and were in fact worse off with the shift of Starlight's body. If you want a taste of how they feel, go be upside down somewhere for a while. Not exactly the same thing, but its the closest you'll probably get. The last ones either recognized they wouldn't be able to escape while Starlight was moving--and so tried to find someplace safe to stay put--or in desperation threw themselves from her lips to the world below. The outside of her marehood hardly faired any better; those who were unable to reach the cushion before Starlight got up now clung to her fur for dear life. Some of them even wished they were inside of her, if only to find some rest for their burning muscles.
Regardless of where they were though, only those who were trapped would survive what happened next.
It was a simple thing to Starlight; a hop, skip, and a jump down a few stairs. But for her involuntary passengers, it was an act tantamount to pushing the eject button on a secret spy car--you know, the kind that launches the passenger out of the roof? The people both inside and outside of her, for the briefest of moment's, were freed from gravity's embrace, and within the span of a second all but the Girl trapped in her Urethra--who was only tossed around in the tunnel--and those glued to her walls found themselves free falling to the floor below.
Oh, and that weirdo who decided to try and reach her cervix was still inside her too, but due to the little known fact that the female genitalia isn't known for its ability to produce oxygen, I highly doubt he's going to last long.
An hour passed, than another, and finally the Hearth's Warming party started to wind to a close. It was the first time Starlight Glimmer had actually celebrated the holiday since she was a full grown Mare, and after all the singing, dancing, and socializing the mare could honestly say she had more fun tonight than she had in a very long time.
"Thank you for talking me into staying, Twilight." said Starlight as the duo walked down the castle halls to their respective rooms. "I didn't realize I was missing out on so much."
"You're very welcome, Starlight." Twilight, upon reaching the door to her bedroom, turned to Starlight and smiled. "Happy Hearth's Warming Eve."
"Happy Hearth's Warming Eve, Twilight."
On that night, Starlight Glimmer learned a valuable lesson. Its probably a good thing that she didn't know that she inadvertently caused the deaths of dozens of people, as I imagine that would have overshadowed any lesson, ruined the holiday spirit, and sent the mare spiraling into depression that would have caused thousands of bits in therapy costs to overcome.
Oh, and before I end this little Hearth's Warming chapter, I should probably tell you what happened to the survivors of this ordeal.. The ones who escaped during Twilight's story were still, unfortunately, lost on the chair, while the few tangled in her tail eventually found their way out as she slept. I imagine it will be tough to eke out a life on a mare's bed, but I'm sure they'll be fine...
Nobody made it out of the mare's honey pot, I'm afraid. The closest one to succeeding was the Girl who fell into her urethra, and that's only a technicality as she only escaped because Starlight used the bathroom before bed. Unfortunately, at her size, the 'water' pressure was fatal.
You know, I've found that almost every story as a moral, especially in the world of Equestria where even the simplest thing can be made into a lesson of some sort. The moral of this story, I think, is to stay away from chairs... or something like that.
The group had decided it was Tuesday today. Not because they had any idea of what day it actually was, but because they wanted to have something--anything--that brought some semblance of normalcy to their otherwise chaotic lives. When they arrived in Equestria at twenty strong, they did so in the home of a certain Carrot Top, a goldenrod orange mare who, and this is no surprise to anyone, was a carrot farmer.
This particular group of humans, after weeks of surviving the unaware pony's home, had so far only lost five of their own. This is due to two things; the first being that they found themselves in the favorable position of appearing in Carrot Top's kitchen, and the second being that they actually had relatively good teamwork. All our lives we're told we need to work together, but its only when a few of us are stepped on by giant, golden hooves that it really hits us that it wasn't just the mad ramblings of someone who wanted something but was too lazy to just go out and get it himself.
"Alright, everybody know what they're doing?" asked Bob. I know I said I wasn't going to name them anymore, but much like how Animal Planet insists on naming the animals who are just going to die, sometimes it just makes it easier to distinguish the one from the many.
"Are we sure its gone?" That one was Claire. "Yesterday Jane almost got stepped on because the giant decided it was going to stay inside all day. We don't need that happening again, Bob."
"Its not like we have anything to go on besides what its down these last couple weeks. If the ground ends up shaking, than you hightail your ass back here as fast as those legs can carry you. Only thing we can do if we want to survive."
There was some muttering going on amongst the humans, but after a minute or two was sufficiently wasted they each went out to do their own job. Five of them would go find crumbs to break apart and bring back, ten would go out in search of any droplets of water, while the remaining five split up to watch for any bugs that might threaten their scavenging.
The few responsible for food usually found their bounty before the others, finding bits of stale bread, crackers, cookies, and occasionally lettuce and bits of fruit. The hard part wasn't finding the crumbs though, it was breaking them down into pieces that could be carried. Of the twenty people that made up the scavengers, not a one was bigger than an ant.
In fact, there weren't many ant-sized humans left in Equestria at all. Whether they were stepped on, eaten, or simply found themselves in a flower garden and couldn't find the way out, their number fell at a staggering rate that for some reason didn't affect their smaller counterparts.
A small bit of that will be touched upon later in the chapter, I promise. Now, where was I? Oh yes, foraging for food. Ahem...
The process it took to scour the kitchen and find the essentials was often a long, tedious affair, which was why it was so important that Carrot Top either be out of the house or sleeping when it happened. Claire was leading the food scavengers--herself, Lily, Robert, Dan, and George--along the bottom of the counters lip.
If you've ever actually been inside a kitchen, you'll notice that no matter how hard you try, food will always find a way to fall beneath the counter, and that was no different for the ponies.
"I think I see a crumb, up ahead!" exclaimed Lily.
"Where is it?" Hard as she squinted, Claire couldn't see the aforementioned crumb. The reason being that it wasn't beneath the counter, but was actually a good few miles--to them--away from it. "Oh, fuck that." Claire muttered. "It'll take hours to go there, get the food, and get back. I'm not going to risk being stepped on for a few night's worth of stale cracker."
"We're not having any luck looking around here, are we? The food stores are low--for gods sake Claire, we might not even find anything else! We need this."
"She's right." George, without waiting for any affirmative from Claire, began to venture out into the open. "We can't afford to be careful right now. What we have will only last use a night or two--I'm not gonna wait till we start to starve before deciding the risk is necessary."
The other people waited on Claire's word whether or not to stay or go, and after a few seconds of thinking it over sighed to herself and followed after George.
Carrot Top sighed as she trotted along the dirt path leading to her home. For the past few weeks, she's been getting ready for Winter Wrap up; solidifying spring contracts, buying and repairing equipment, and on the nice winter days she was outside tending to her fields in whatever small capacity that may be, usually involving removing any debris that may have wound up on her property. Just because it was winter didn't mean there wasn't still many important things that needed to be done around the farm.
It was that last task that had kept the mare outside for the last few hours, and after trotting around in the snow making repairs to the farm and ensuring everything was in order, she felt a well-deserved mug of cocoa was exactly what was needed. Did you know that the smell of chocolate helps with relaxation? I read that once in a book. I don't know if its true, but its a nice thought all the same.
So when Carrot top finally entered her house, she wasted no time in removing her winter attire. Her coat, scarf, hat and boots were all tossed to the side to be dealt with later--when a mare wants cocoa, everything else can wait after all. In quick order she trotted into the kitchen, set the stove, pulled out a packet or two of some cocoa mix, and waited patiently for the water to boil.
"How much do we have?" Dan rubbed the sweat from her forehead as he looked to the others for an answer. "We've been chipping away at this crumb for a while, and I'm kinda running out of courage here. Feels like we're tempting fate, ya know?"
Robert tossed another fragment of crumb into his little sack--which, to avoid any confusing on your part, was made from the shirts they wore when they arrived--and gave it lift. "A few pounds on my part, give or take."
The rest did the same, making sure they had enough food to last them at least a few days, before unanimously agreeing to return back to their little home. A few minutes later though, and the ground began to rumble. Each and every person's blood ran cold; they knew that that meant Carrot Top was back, and that if they didn't hurry there was a very real chance one of them might die.
They started running--sprinting as fast as their legs could go. They ran until their blood pumped battery acid and their lungs burned from exertion, but no matter how fast they moved, they could never go fast enough to outpace the giant pony. Twice the mare had passed over them, each step causing the quintuple to stagger and fall. It was the last one that caught Claire, however. As she was rising back to her feet, Carrot Top's island sized hoof came crashing down on her from above.
The only way you can understand how the rest of the group felt after seeing that, was if you were in a similar situation yourself. Not with a giant pony, obviously, but there are plenty dangerous things in this world. If you have, I'm sorry you went through that. If not, then you couldn't possibly understand the pain of watching it happen like the rest did.
Heh, but there is a silver lining here. Claire, as you know, was small. So small was the woman, that when Carrot Top's hoof fell on her, she survived on account that there was enough space in the hoof's frog that she remained alive. The impact from the mare's step ensured that Claire's eardrums had burst, and for several minutes each breath she took absolutely reeked of hoof sweat and dirt, and much to her disgust the she even felt the salty fluid seeping into her clothes, coating her skin.
But then, with just a single step from the giant mare, Claire was once again free. She tried to stand, to start running again, but it was as though someone put her in a swivel chair and spun her around for good long hour. Friendship, though, is a wondrous thing. Perhaps it was because of the shock, or perhaps they felt they needed to see Claire's remains for themselves, but regardless of their reasons the four people were still there, and with a little help they were once more on their way back to their home.
Carrot Top walked out to the living room, cocoa in hoof, and took a seat in front of the fire. She couldn't wait until winter was over; while there was still plenty to do, the work was more boring than planting and harvesting, and if one were to put any stock on the images lovingly branded upon their flanks, that was where Carrot Top's true passion lied.
In the kitchen, Bob and the rest of the scavengers saw that Claire was walked back into their home--a tiny crack set into the wall that lead to a space just big enough to live in some semblance of comfort. She would be out of commission for a few months, but the trip was a success on all fronts, and it was better to be bedridden than dead.
No matter how dismal things may seem, there is always a light shining in the darkness. With a little effort, luck, and a teaspoon of help, humans can survive just about anything. Kind of like cockroaches, only without the wave of disgust and intense desire to kill them before they get into your food and lay eggs everywhere. Ugh, I hate those little butt-breathing bastards...
The Pie family were a peculiar bunch. Igneous Rock and Cloudy Quartz were... antiquated. They spoke in "Ye Old Equestriane", and would probably have fit right in a thousand years ago. They sounded ridiculous in modern society, but I suppose that is to be expected with this particular family.
Before you start thinking I'm going to blather on about those two, let’s move onto the next Pie member--in no particular order--Marble Pie.
Ah, Marble. A Mare so shy she makes Fluttershy look like her pink, bouncy sister. Between you and me, she's one of my favorite Ponies in Equestria. Her color scheme is bland, her personality is obscured by her inability to communicate with others, and I'm sure she's a very sweet mare. Or, she's a raving psycho ready to snap and bake everypony into rocks or... something. Beautiful.
Her sister Limestone Pie is the exact opposite, however, and in this context what I'm saying is that she's a complete and total bitch. In fact, I have it on good authority that she throws rocks--what is it with Ponies and their obsession with things? Apples. Rocks. Books. Cakes--at birds. Why, you may ask? Because they sat on Holders Boulder; an immense rock that has some importance or another, I don't really care. Horrible pony.
Next up, we have Pinkie Pie. Ah, Pinkie; to try and quantify this mysteriously hyperactive party pony is a task no person is truly ready for. I once heard that this particular mare threw a party that was so superty-duper fun that she had to throw a party to celebrate the success of that party called "The Last Party Was A Success So Lets Party" party which was hailed to be the greatest party in all party history and was in fact such an amazing party it eclipsed the "The Last Party Wasn't So Great But This One Will Totally Make Up For It I Promise" party that Equestria but really just Ponyville raved was ten out of ten would party again party... party...
Um... I'm sorry; I seem to have forgotten what I was talking about. Let me just backtrack here...
.... .... ....
Ah! Right, Maud Pie--a name that's a creative way of saying Mud Pie, for those who didn't know--. This mare of a most stoic disposition is like a closed book that's been locked, chained, and hidden away beneath the darkest of beds. Believe it or not, she's actually a very emotional pony, but for some strange reason she isn't able to show any of them externally, baring the odd moment or two. It was this mare, in fact, that our next human--yes, singular--would have the misfortune of meeting...
Milly was a survivor. I'm actually being serious here--in a group of sixteen people, Milly was the last one left alive. You see, when Humanity came to Equestria Milly and gang found themselves on the floor of the Friendship Express--a train with a ridiculous name that traveled the whole of Equestria. Naturally, such a thing would bring with it ponies from all trots of life--fat ones, thin ones, mares and stallions, red ones, blue ones, old ones, and even new ones.
Due to this traffic, it was only a matter of time before the humans started to die. I have an idea; instead of telling you how they died, I'm just going to skip over it and let you use your imagination, because if I can be completely honest with you--and I feel like I can--I don't really care enough to go into it.
Milly--wait, where was Milly? She's so damn small she--oh! She's under one of the train's seats. I knew that.
Ahem.
Milly was underneath one of the train's seats as the monstrous machine clickity-clacked its way toward Tall Tale. If someone were to find and ask how she was doing, she would probably reply "Lonely", which was natural considering everyone else died in incredibly horrible, brutal ways. She was still determined to live, however, clinging onto the hope that perhaps she wasn't the only one left on the train.
She wasn't, but the others were stories for another day.
Today, she was simply trying to find something to eat, but so far had little luck. The train car had been cleaned out just earlier that day--somehow leaving her whole and unswept--, and the pony sitting in the seat above her was not particularly hungry.
"Come on... there's got to be something..." She muttered to herself. She had no idea that, just above her, a meteor was falling with enough speed to leave her a tiny red splotch on the train floor. I'm not going to lie, I kind of want it to end like that--it would be such a stupid way to die that its tempting to say that's what happened and move onto the next person, but that's not really why I'm here, is it? I'm here to tell you what really happened, to document the survival of... hell, you know why I'm here.
The rock missed, naturally, but that doesn't mean it didn't mark her for something worse. She was so shocked at almost being crushed, that she failed to notice the giant, bluish gray hoof reaching down before it was already on top of her. With an indescribable amount of G-Forces, she and the rock were both scooped up.
"What have I told you about trying to sneak off, Boulder?" Asked Maud in a perfectly monotone voice. To those who didn't know the mare, it would seem as if she was the model of apathy in how she spoke, but inside she was crying out in fear and worry at the potential loss of her beloved pet. She was infinitely more complicated than others gave her credit for, and as she tucked Boulder and out current protagonist Milly into the pocket of her drab colored smock, she continued, "I promise we'll explore the next train."
Milly, having some semblance of an idea of where she was, was wise enough to stay put on top of Boulder instead of trying to escape. If she did, than she would probably fall deeper into the pocket, maybe even get lost in the fabric if she were small enough. As it were she simply waited as the train reached its destination.
The rest of the ride was far from easy, however. Almost every step Maud took made Boulder shift in the pocket, but to the tiny human it was as if the earth itself was upset with her and was trying to dump her into an pocket-sized abyss. It took all her strength just to hold on, but as all things do her trial eventually came to an end.
Maud was staying in a hotel for the night. There was a geological dig site in Tall Tale, and she was excited for the chance to learn about any new type of rocks that might have been discovered. Yes, that's actually a thing in Equestria. Look it up.
Maud pulled her pet rock--and Milly--from her pocket and set them on a bedside table before heading into the bathroom to wash her hooves. Milly took this time to get a look at her surroundings, only to realize her eyes were too small to see much beyond Boulder himself. She could try to escape, but she had no idea where she was. It was a conundrum that would be unfair to force upon any creature; stay and risk being killed, or leave and risk dying? Much like a doctor taking the 'wait and see' approach, Milly chose the former.
But I'm sure you just want to shut up and get to the part you are undoubtedly waiting for, so because I'm a nice person I'm going to stop blathering about the minute and get on with the good part.
Maud walked out of the bathroom, smock removed, hooves cleaned, and a towel held in one leg, and crawled onto the hotel bed. Her face, as expressionless as ever, bore the faintest tint of red along its muzzle and cheeks. Her heart pump-pump-pumped in her barrel, and the private area usually hidden beneath her smock and tail tingled with anticipation as the mare's hind-legs spread open. She placed the towel to her side for later use, and without wasting another moment lowered her freshly cleaned hoof between her thighs.
A small, barely noticeably moan radiated from her throat as a hoof powerful enough to shatter stone gently traced the lips of her most delicate region--a little self-foreplay, as it were, to get the juices flowing. She did this for a few seconds, before shifting her focus on the little upside-down heart shaped organ that was her clitoris, pressing against it with her hoof before slowly, ever so slowly, moving it down towards her plot.
She alternated between these two methods as her sex slowly swelled and opened with arousal, before coming to a sudden stop. Her cheeks burned not only from ecstasy, but embarrassment.
"Boulder..." the mare said evenly, "Don't watch."
She removed her hoof--a word I'm going to be using a lot, I'm afraid-- from between her legs and pushed the little rock away from her, as if she was averting his eyes. A ridiculous sentiment; Boulder, being a rock, was incapable of seeing what she was doing, and even if he could see he was still very much a rock, and as such would feel nothing at the sight of his master pleasuring herself.
What Maud didn't know, was that in pushing Boulder away, the little human on top of him lost her balance, and in quick order tumbled down into the thin, sticky layer of fluid that coated Maud's gigantic hoof. The smell was horrible, but as Maud moved to resume her lewd act with Milly in tow, that smell was only going to grow much, much worse.
As far as Milly was concerned, the cavernous depths of the mare's vagina might as well have been the very gates of hell. With each movement the hoof made, Milly was slammed by a mass of G-Forces before, literally, being grinded into the fleshy walls of Maud's privates. What started off as a little fluid became a tidal wave that coated her entire being; the musky stench of arousal was all she could smell, and the flavor--a bitter, earthy taste quickly became a constant companion to her tongue, and whether it was seconds or minutes Milly soon found the grinding feeling wasn't from her body hitting the soft flesh of the labia, but the hoof hitting her over and over and over again.
With her sex fully inflated and her body now producing a healthy amount of lubricant, Maud decided it was time to get a bit more rough with herself. Her hoof flicked against her clit rhythmically, grinded into her lips, and dipped deeper into her pony body. She gasped and moaned, eyes closed and face a mask of serenity--which in this particular scene meant her expression was still just as unreadable as ever.
Milly was lost in an oceanic torrent of boiling hot pony cum, her body being dragged up and down along the walls, lips, hoof, and depths of Maud Pie, her every attempt at moving herself thwarted not only by the constant barrage of the giant mare, but also by the overwhelmingly thick fluids that she was floating it. Cum, as you are likely aware, is much more thick than water. Trying to swim through it was the same as trying to swim through an ocean of glue, if you can imagine that.
It was inevitable that, eventually, Maud would reach an orgasm. The walls tightened and spasmed around Milly, Maud's hind-legs kicked into the air as he hips bucked in primal pleasure. Within seconds, the area between the mare's legs became drenched in cum, and if one were to look into her depths they would even see a few slimy strands stretching between her walls. By some unfortunate miracle that I'm sure I had nothing to do with, It was in spill of fluids that our diminutive protagonist, Milly, had currently found herself.
I say unfortunate miracle, because even though Milly had survived the vigorous masturbation session, she was still trapped in the murky liquid that came from it--a liquid, I feel I should mention, that now glazed the giant mare's ponut, tiny human and all. An hour passed before Maud was completely finished pleasuring herself, and with limbs that shook from ecstasy the mare reached for the towel and wiped her hooves clean.
She opted to save the rest of her cleaning until morning; an orgasm or three leaves a mare somewhat unmotivated, you understand, and all Maud really wanted to do now was sleep. She pulled the covers over her body, wished her beloved pet Boulder a somewhat embarrassed sounding—to her own ears-- goodnight and soon drifted off into Luna's realm of dreams, unaware that an alien being from another dimension was glued to the burning furnace of her tailhole like a bug caught in amber, as she should be.
Because really, that just sounds ridiculous.
The Mane Escape (Request, Mane Forest, Sweat Threat, Adventure)
The Crystal Empire was a place you would expect to find in a fairytale--well, that went for most of Equestria but it was apt description regardless. A kingdom once ruled by an oppressive dictator who was only interesting when you read about him in alternative source materials, it was now ruled by the fair and kind Princess Mi Amore Cadenza--Or Princess Cadence, as she liked to be called. It was a perfect mix of regality and humility; by shortening her name, she appears more approachable, but by leaving Princess you are constantly reminded that, yes, this mare could have you executed for eating the last of her tarts.
Naturally, not being an being of pure evil and/or madness, the chances of that happening were so insubstantial that I wouldn't even know where to start just to have an idea of the probability. But I fear I may have gone a bit off topic here. Princess Celestia had just started to raise the sun, and regardless of whether or not she wanted to deal with the hum-drum day to day that meant Princess Cadence had to get up as well.
"Gmmmmahhm." Truly, a sentence that defies convention for royalty. Take a moment, would you, and imagine a pony princess making that noise upon waking up. Majestic, isn't it? Not-surprisingly, Princess Cadence did not want to get out of her bed. It took an extra ten minutes before her husband, Prince Shining Armor, managed to rouse his own personal sleeping beauty from her slumber.
"Look," Shining Armor started. "You've got a lot to take care of today. Why not let me take care of Flurry Heart? You just go get ready, alright?"
Princess Cadence smiled an adghsvcnvfkdshv
Oh, um... huh... Honestly, I have no idea how that happened. Did I have a spasm? Oh well, I'll summarize; Cadence thanks Shining Armor, kisses him, and goes about her marry way.
Hm... I wish I could have told you the entirety of the scene. Oh, that kiss was beautiful; it was something you would have told your friends about, something that would have made you rethink the meaning of true love and change you in the best way imaginable. Its shame you missed out on it. It was quite touching.
Anyway, as this was happening, something quite peculiar was taking place in the tangled mess that made up the Princesses mane. You see, by some strange occurrence that I highly advise you don't dwell on, a small... hm, I keep saying 'group' in these situations, don't I? Hold on, I'm going to look for a synonym to freshen things up a bit....
Ah, band! That sounds adventurous, doesn't it? A small band--oh, I love it-- of humans had found themselves, for the second time, displaced--which in this instance means that instead of being transported to another world, they were instead placed within the violet, gold, and rose colored mane of the Princess of Love.
There were only six this time, and not a one of them was familiar with the others. More importantly, they had no idea where they were! The soft, pale ground radiated a rather pleasant warmth from its surface, and while the smell was a strange mix of strawberry and...sweat, perhaps? It wasn't unpleasant. A bit overpowering, sure, but as far as odors go Cadence's mane was nothing to be offended over.
That didn't stop the various peoples from panicking. Truly, it only takes being teleported to an alien planet and watching as those around you are killed in ways ranging from violent, to obscene, to downright stupid before you grow wary of such anomalous circumstances. Some broke down and cried, others yelled at each other as if somehow the other person made it happen, and one---wait, what is that one doing? Is he just walking away? That's not right! He's supposed to be mediating between the arguing people, being the voice of reason, not bloody walking away!
...Why is he walking away? Well now I have to follow him, he could be doing something interesting! Onward, to the unknown!
Calvin--we're going to call him Calvin--wasn't going to have any of what was going on in that band of idiots. People crying, screaming at each other, asking stupid questions--he's seen it before, seen what traveling with people like that could lead too. So he left, while they were distracted, and made his way deeper into the 'forest'.
Still, some questions burned at the mind. Where exactly was he? Why was he teleported again? Questions that were unfortunately interrupted as Cadence moved her head to talk to her husband. What amounted to a simple, automatic motion to the mare was tantamount to a geological nightmare. The movement was too much for poor Calvin to handle, and without so much as a "Look out, the world's moving" the man found himself being thrown into the firm, soft, somewhat oily skin of Cadence's scalp. He rolled, cursed, and finally came to a stop when he crashed into a purple strand of hair.
He had just as much warning when Cadence turned and started walking, and just like the last time the man was tossed from his spot. By the time he was able to grab onto a hair and keep himself from being thrown around like the people he left behind--who, by the way, were having a very bad time right now--he was very upset to discover the natural oils of the mare's head had coated his body in a light film. Naturally, he had no idea what the oil actually was, but even so one does not often find themselves in such a situation without thinking "Ew, I'm covered in something grease-like, what a revolting circumstance this turned out to be."
He was a quick learner, though. Even as the G-Forces tried to force him back, Calvin had decided to swim with the tide, as it were, than against it. He waited, patiently, for Cadences movement to pull his weight in the direction he wanted before letting go of the strand to grab the next. Over and over he did this, slowly heading towards the back of her neck as she got ready for the day.
When she stopped completely, he would take the chance to sprint through her mane as fast as his microscopic legs could carry him--which, by the way, was not very fast at all.
All of this was lost on the Alicorn, however, as she spit the toothpaste-filled fluids of her mouth out into the sink. She had at least an hour or two before she had to deal with Princess stuff, and Shining Armor had more a less given her the go ahead to do whatever the hell she wanted until than, and while it may sound strange to the more sedentary of you, the Princess of love only wanted one thing.
She wanted to run, to fly, to get her blood pumping through her veins and feel alive! Okay, that was technically three things, but you get what I meant. She wanted to exercise; you see, the thing about being a Princess was that you spent a lot of time sitting. You sit during court, you sit when going over laws, you sit when being presented with gifts--honestly, if the job was something you could apply for sitting for long periods of time would probably be pretty high on the requirement list.
It was for this reason that Cadence had walked out to the balcony of her room and, with a flap of her wings, soared into the sky. This was not a good thing for our Band of former protagonists, but for Calvin the Competent it was just another trial to overcome. As Cadences mane billowed in the breeze, it was all he could do to keep himself from flying off to his death. Each strand was like a tentacle writhing and flailing around as if to cast him away, and each one was one was a risk he felt he needed to take.
It was clear to Calvin now that he was in the hair of one of the giants; it was the only logical conclusion, though how he got there was a mystery he feared would never be answered. Right now though, he had something more important on his mind--he had to keep moving.
"But Mr. Narrator." You may be saying "How is Calvin supposed to keep going when Cadence is flying too fast for him to move?"
Well, that's easy; he had to let go. As the cool winter air of the Crystal Empire blew through the Princess's mane, Calivin--ever the darer--would let go of the strand he was holding onto, either grabbing onto another as it passed or simply taking hold of the one he was on once more when he was further down.
It was a harrowing trial, one that couldn't afford even the slightest mistake. He did this only for a few moments, however, before he saw one of his fellows whipping past him, screaming, into the open sky. That was all the convincing he needed to cease his attempts, and simply try and hold onto the hair he was on until his host calmed down.
Ten minutes of this passed, then twenty. Cadence, not feeling like she was pushing herself hard enough, had took to playing with the clouds, or casting harmless spells into the air as she flew. Once she felt her heart beat-beat-beating in her barrel, and her wings begin to slow from exhaustion, she decided it was time to give her legs a workout.
She landed in the track that Shining Armor trained the ponies for the Equestria games and sighed. She knew this little session wasn't going to do much for her in the long run, but it felt nice to be out doing something when things were peaceful, instead of when Equestria was being beset by some monster or another.
She pawed at the ground with her hoof for a moment--by the way, she was naked. Not wearing any Regalia at all, so if you were picturing her adorned with golden shoes and crown I'm here to set you straight--before setting off at a full gallop.
Calvin, however, was very distraught. He had reached the back of Cadence's neck, but the impact of her landing had forced him to let go of her hair. When he hit the skin, not only was his breath knocked out of him, but he was horrified to discover her skin had grown wet. Now I'm not sure if you've ever had the breath knocked out of you, but in case you haven't imagine yourself unable to take anything but short, gasping breaths. No matter how hard you try, its as though your lungs cut off each attempt you make at breathing; you can't move, can hardly speak--in short, it sucks. Now, imagine that, only with handfuls of salt water--in this case, pony sweat--flooding your mouth with each breath.
Then, with all that going on, imagine the world is constantly jerking back and forth. Cadence was running after all, which meant a lot of her muscles were being used. Honestly, it's a miracle that Calvin didn't drown with all that going on. Cadence ran for a good half hour, yet even though Calvin was incapacitated, what seemed to be an unfortunate situation turned out to be a blessing. Cadence, despite the winter air, was sweating. For those still on her scalp this was a nightmare; some were sweat up in tsunami-like floods and washed away, while others were simply drowned.
Calvin, being on the back of the mare's neck, was ultimately taken by the former. The hot droplets of sweat pumping from Cadence's pores ran down her neck, converging and diverging seemingly at random. Calvin, like a leaf in a stream, was swept up by this salty current and lead further down the pony's body. Time and time again the droplets he was caught in would run through the mare's pink fur, depositing him by the strands only for him to be grabbed by the next one as it passed.
Calvin was tired, as anyone would be in his situation, and had no strength to fight anymore. Thirty minutes passed before Cadence's royal butt hit the ground in exhaustion. It is hard to truly describe the smell of pony sweat; some say its sweet smelling, others say its pungent, but perhaps it was a bit of both? Regardless, I hope it's not a bad smell, because Calvin would likely smell like and exhausted Cadence for some time.
Cadence sitting down was the last step in Calvin's escape; he was carried down the Princess's back, down to her flanks, and with a barely noticeable drip both he and the last drop of sweat that grabbed him fell from Cadence's body and hit the ground beneath her rump with a wet splash.
It took until the mare stood up and walked away before our hero realized he was free. Yes, he smelled like sweaty horse, yes he was soaked to the bone, and yes he was very hot. But more importantly than that, he was alive, and it is this Narrator's hopes that out defiant little protagonist finds someplace where he can live, instead of... you know... being stepped on by a Crystal Pony or something.
"Wow Cadence, you look like you ran the entirety of the Empire. I'm not gonna lie, its a good look for you."
As Cadence walked into the room, she couldn't help but smile at seeing her husband holding their child. While I personally detest the little monster, the two ponies couldn't be happier with their little bundle.
"I feel like I ran the entirety of the Empire." she replied. "Get a good look, because I'm going to go take a shower. I feel disgusting... How much time is left before the Crystal Court?"
"You've still got an hour."
Cadence nodded and, after giving Flurry Heart a sweaty nuzzle, walked into the bathroom to make herself presentable for her little ponies. Only two people were still alive in Cadence's mane. It was a good thing Calvin took the route he did, because even if he survived Cadence exercising, he would have perished along with the other two during her shower.
Five more dead. How many humans is that...? Well, I guess it doesn't really matter; the stories must go on, after all.
You know, I've been trying to find a story to tell you that felt new. One that was unique, that wouldn't be like any of the others. Then, while I was thinking that, I thought something else; does it truly matter? There are going to be stories that are like the others, so why try and space them out and ignore the ones already happening around me?
And it was with that thought that I decided, unequivocally, that I was going to throw my former plans out the window like an Exes laundry and just go with it! So, without further ado, let’s go into the Ponyville... what the devil was the name of that restaurant Twilight went with the Crusaders? Oh, who cares--the point is, Rainbow Dash and the rest of the Wonderbolts were currently waiting for their order of Hayburgers to be delivered to their table.
"I'm telling you guys, this place is awesome!" Explained Rainbow Dash, newest member of the Wonderbolts and my personal favorite. "Best burgers in town, you'll see."
"That's the third time you've told us that, Crash." Spitfire replied. "I think we get it."
Rainbow, laughing an awkward laugh, looked behind her to see if their food was ready. She knew she was repeating herself, but even though she was now a member of the aerial squad of pegasi, she still had a serious case of hero worship going on. If you've ever had a hero I'm sure you can imagine yourself in her shoes, if not... well, I suppose we're the unlucky ones, aren't we?
"Yeah, don't worry so much Crash. It can't be any worse than last month when Fleetfoot took us to that bland restaurant in Canterlot." Ah Soarin. He had a heart the size of his appetite, but that didn't change the fact that he was kind of a loser. I'm not saying that to be mean, personally I kind of like the stallion, but when your team lies to you and tries to replace you with a prismatic maned speed-addict during trials how else are we supposed to view him?
"It had a three hoof rating!" Defended Fleetfoot, "How was I supposed to know it wasn't going to taste like anything?" Fun fact; Fleetfoot has a thing for Big McIntosh. Not relevant to the story, but something to think about all the same.
What was relevant, however, was what was going on in the kitchen. While the Wonderbolts chatted amicably in the restaurant proper, events of a much more traumatic nature were taking place behind closed doors. It was of no fault to the cooks; how were they supposed to know the buns they grabbed happened to be the ones with tiny, hungry people on them?
There were twenty-eight in all, and despite living in a kitchen this collection of people had no way of easily obtaining food. There was never a time when the kitchen wasn't busy, meaning the humans had to take chances--had to do things many would view as completely insane just to survive.
There were more here, you know, back when Humanity had arrived in Equestria. Some were washed away when the ponies cleaned, some were stepped on, but most of them ended up in the same position as our current cast; in the food. It was one of those insane risks for survival I mentioned; risking being eaten so they themselves could eat--a tragic state of affairs really, but let’s look on the bright side! Their lives, as we can all agree on, pretty much suck--okay, you know what? What I was going to say isn't going to make things sound better, so let’s just move on, shall we?
Peanuts! I forgot to pause the story for the exposition--we've missed... oh, the plates were just placed on the table. We haven't really missed anything.
Wonderful.
The quadruple pegasi wasted no time in enjoying their meals; especially Soarin, who might as well have shoved the entire burger into his mouth and swallowed it whole for all the chewing he did. Rainbow Dash, not used to the stallion's voracious appetite, was a strange mix of amazed and disgusted at the display. The humans on his food, however, lacked the chance to feel anything but horror as one minute they were on a rather amazing smelling hayburger, screaming in terror at what they knew was coming, and the next they were tossed inside the humid, salivating maw of Soarin as he viciously and mercilessly masticated the meal and sent it down his gullet into the empty belly below.
Hm... I don't know, I feel like there should be more depth to that description. It's not every day you get eaten by a celebrity, and an alien one at that! Let’s see things from the human's perspective, shall we? Starting with this batch right here...
They didn't know what was going on--okay, that was a lie, but they didn't want to believe it. The Stallion's mouth was as relentless as it was merciless; waves of saliva slammed into the humans, absolutely drenching them before the giant slug-like tongue tossed the freshly bitten chunk--people and all--to the side of his mouth to chew. Those who managed to either avoid or escape the hayburger, if they had the light to see what was happening, would have screamed in righteous horror. They were already screaming, mind you, but it would have intensified immensely.
Even if it did intensify, though, the sounds of Soarin eating would have drowned it out completely. Wet, sloshing, slapping sounds overwhelmed every other noise besides the unintelligibly explosive "nom nom nom" noises the stallion made as he chewed. Many, if not all, of the people still alive in his mouth made a brief effort to move, but between the movement of his jaw and the constant flailing of his tongue, and the mass quantities of spit that filled his mouth like an ocean all they could do was swim, and even that was borderline impossible.
And to think, all this happened in the span of three chews. As I said before, Soarin might as well have swallowed the burger whole; the mushy clump of hay, bread, tomato, and various other condiments were swiftly pulled to the back of Soarin's throat, and with an audible 'gulp' he sent it, a wash of saliva, and the majority of the humans that weren't chewed up down his esophagus to be processed for whatever minuscule amount of nutrients they could provide.
The other people weren't fairing much better with the Mares; for instance, Spitfire was much more deliberate as she ate. Is that the right word? Well, in this particular scenario, the word meant she savored her meal more than Soarin--which for the humans, meant it was a slower process. One bite after another, the humans were forced to watch as the giant, yellow wall of her muzzle chomped down on their landscape--taking it, and their friends, into the hungry mouth beyond.
Spitfire's mouth was not a deluge of spit like Soarin's, but that didn't mean it was any safer. As I had mentioned, she savored her meal, and her tongue proved much more dexterous than the former's did. With each bite, the people caught in her mouth were swished back and forth by the thrashing pink organ, and as a result fewer managed to avoid the gruesome fate of her molars. Those that did would find themselves and pressed into the roof of her mouth by the muscle as the mare's saliva forced its way into the mushy mass--and all those alive within it--before being quickly sucked out to gather all the flavors. Did you know at that size humans didn't have much of a flavor? That's right; even though they were forced to suffer through this process, Spitfire gained nothing from their unfortunate addition as seasoning. It was as if they weren't even there at all.
Like before, the mashed up hayburger and all those within it were collected on the center of the pony's tongue, and just like before it was sent down into the depths of her belly to be digested. Those that managed to avoid being swallowed only had a few seconds to celebrate as light flooded into Spitfire's mouth, briefly illuminating the glistening pink surroundings and stands of saliva that stretched from tongue to roof, before she took another bite of her hayburger and once more repeated the process.
Fleetfoot's eating habits hardly differed from Spitfire's, but much to my own personal disgust she was a pony who chewed with her mouth open, something she shared with Soarin, though for some reason I forgot to mention it. Ugh... its a revolting habit, really, one I recommend anyone reading this to break. Its loud, gross, and ruins an otherwise pleasant meal for others. if you don't chew with your mouth open, than don't worry about it; you're already a master of dining etiquette, so go ahead and give yourself a pat on the back--I'll wait.
Done? Well, Fleetfoot wasn't; one bite after the next she sent people into the watery cavern of teeth and muscle, oblivious of the absolute hell that her and her companions were causing just by doing something as crucial to their own survival as eating lunch. Those in the arctic colored mare's mouth were, in a way, safer from her molars than the others for the simple fact that the pegasus kept her food on the left side of her mouth, leaving those who avoided being stuck in the hayburger relatively safe from the terrifying chomping of her teeth.
The most nightmarish aspect could be found a few sentences back; Fleetfoot chewed with her mouth open, which meant the people inside were constantly subjected to the sights within said mouth by the flashes of light that funneled through with each movement of her jaw. They saw the moving mass that was her tongue as it swept up loose bits of food and brought them back to the clump for further crushing. They were able to scream at the approaching tsunamis of saliva that rushed towards them, instead of being caught off-guard in the dark, and were actually able to watch in abject horror as their friends were caught in floods of spit and bits of food. The ones that were sent into the chewed mass, well... its a good thing they wouldn't suffer the trauma of seeing what happened, I suppose.
Those in Fleetfoot's food were swallowed in a different matter than those with the other ponies, however, in that they were caught in a flood of soda as she opted to wash her meal down with a drink as opposed to swallowing it by itself. By the time she got to her next bite, anyone who wasn't crushed by her teeth had been washed away into her waiting stomach.
Finally, that leaves us with Rainbow Dash. Phew, you have no idea how difficult it is to detail so many different ponies’ mouths in one sitting, while still trying to describe how different each one is from the last! The humans were too small to notice the subtle things like how Spitfire's tongue was more curved than Fleetfoot's, or how Soarin had two more teeth than both of them, and a filling from when he was a colt. I think I managed relatively well given what I was working with.
Now, Rainbow was still a bit shocked at seeing Soarin absolutely devour his meal, and as such the people on her burger had a bit more time to try and escape. They ran past sesame seeds the size of hills, over a landscape that was not only uneven, but bore canyons in them that swallowed up more than a few people. Those canyons were just wrinkles, naturally, but they were unavoidable obstacles when you're smaller than a gnat. Gnat--what an ugly word.
Those lucky enough to be near an edge jumped, but it was a short fall before they landed on either the outskirts of the hay-patty--which for many lead between the hay--or in the thick, viscous surface of the condiments. Might as well have tried to jump into tar, for all the good landing in ketchup did them.
By the time she wrapped her hooves around her food, just about all the people on top of it somehow managed to find themselves in a worse position than they were when they started. The prismatic maned mare took her first bite of her burger, and immediately "mmmmed" in contentment before telling everypony at the table that she 'told them so'--all while still chewing her meal. By the way, talking with your mouth full is also a bad habit, so you should stop that too.
What amounted to an unintelligible noise of delight and a few words to Rainbow was so much worse for the poor souls in her cavernous maw. Her raspy voice boomed and echoed all around them; her tongue flicked, flailed, and pulsated beneath them, scattering them inside her mouth as if they were loaded into a living catapult. Her mouth, without a doubt, was the most chaotic; a few people were sent flying from the humid depths of her muzzle as she spoke, some landing back on the burger to undergo the horror once more, while others simply kept falling.
Some humans fell back into the growing sea of spit that was collecting in her mouth, some were stuck in a waterfall of drool that dribbled from her maw as she spoke. They were promptly crushed, smeared, and mixed with the liquid as a cerulean fetlock wiped the offending fluid from her jaw.
For the rest who remained in her mouth unchewed, they would soon be pulled to the back of Rainbow's throat and sent on a one way trick down her gullet. Much like Soarin, Rainbow didn't chew much of her food, and so the vast majority of people in her mouth would get to experience her belly first hand.
This process repeated itself for about ten more minutes, with the only difference being that everyone else, regardless of how full their mouths were, joined in on the conversations.
Now, inside their stomachs was a completely different kind of experience, one that I'm afraid I simply won't be able detail via each individual pony like I did while they ate.
Regardless of whose gut you looked into, there was nothing really to distinguish who was who. Each one was a pit of gastric acids absolutely flooded with carbonated beverages and mashed up hayburger. To those who survived the trip down, the sphincter leading from the esophagus to the stomach deposited them into this growing foulness. Those who were smashed into the gooey mess of food when swallowed had no chance to avoid the acids as they began their intended function of digestion, while those who weren't caught were subjected not only to the erosive fluids, but the environment as well.
The hellacious depths of each ponies stomach was something no person could truly explain. The stuffy, acrid fumes that impregnated the air was an assault to the lungs; it was like vomit, burps, hay, and ketchup swirled into one, grim odor. The only noises were the gurgling and churning of the organ accompanies by the hissing of soda and the beating of their hearts in some mock soundtrack to the humans' demise.
This was all combined with the boiling, humid heat that pumped from every surface like the acid that flooded the chamber, and even for the few who managed to find purchase on the digesting clumps floating in the bog like islands, the contractions and movements of the muscle surrounding them and the waves of acid caused by falling food quickly sent them back into the seething oceans to be processed like any other meal.
In short, being swallowed alive--even by a herbivore--is a horrible experience. Luckily, it wasn't one that needed to be endured for long.
The Wonderbolts, meals digesting away in their bellies, talked amicably about this subject and that. Soarin patted his stuffed belly in content, while Spitfire and Fleetfoot finished their drinks. Rainbow Dash suppressed a silent burp that actually managed to send a few people stuck in her throat back up to her tongue, for what little good it did them, and for a few minutes the pegasi just relaxed.
Not a single one of them could even imagine the scope of what that meal just did. I mean sure, in a universal scale what transpired was so insignificant that it wouldn't even be a blip on the "things to care about" scale, but I'm sure the ponies would be horrified regardless. In fact, even as I tell you this there are at least six people stuck in the Rainbow's and Soarin's throats alongside any bits of food that didn't quite make it all the way down, including the people Rainbow burped up.
"Well, I better get going." Said Rainbow. "i promised I'd help a friend with something, so I'll see you guys later."
As she exchanged farewells, Rainbow noticed she still had a bit of ketchup on her hoof. Not one to waste, she promptly lapped it--and the terrified people stuck in it--up and trotted out the door. Those who were still alive inside of her had the most indescribable experience as they were sent hurtling into whatever slimy surface happened to catch them as Rainbow Dash flew off into the horizon at speeds that--let’s face it--they probably weren't going to survive.
And I think the lesson here, dear readers, is... what is the lesson? Don't eat out with friends? Always wait an hour after eating before flying? Oh, I got it!
The lesson here, is that sometimes you don't always know what's in your food, so its best you don't think about it. Heh, 'don't think about it'. Appropriate.
Alright, take two. What? You want to know what I mean by take two? Don't worry about it, it isn't important. Do you know what is important, though? Magic. It's everywhere in Equus; it's in the beings that live there, it's in the air they breathe, the ground they walk on--basically, if it exists, its at least a little magic.
Except humans. As you already know, humans weren't from Equus; they came from a world that lacked any real magic--at least, before a wave of it sent each and every one of them to Equestria--and thus, overtime, the effects of being exposed to it were... well, lets just say they weren't pleasant.
I'm not going to lie to you, I honestly have no idea how to explain this situation in a structured, coherent way. One day humanity was living their lives--with a few exceptions--and the next... well, lets just try and find someone going through it, shall we? Shouldn't be hard; its hitting everyone at just about the same time.
Lets see... ah, Canterlot; a wonderful city, it has spires, purples, a structural design that would cause any and all people with even the slightest knowledge of physics and/or gravity to scream in abject horror--I mean honestly, who builds an entire city on the side of a mountain? I read a book once with a similar design choice in it; house build with the majority of it hanging over the edge of a cliff, suspended by support beams and whatnot that dug into the cliff face below to keep it aloft.
It fell into the ocean during a storm. But then, they didn't have magical ponies building it, did they? Anyway, this particular city was home to a certain Minuette; a borderline creepy pony with an maya blue coat and a perwinkle mane that had a pigment blue streak running through it. Or, in normal person colors, she was light blue, with a darker blue mane, that had a greyish blue streak.
Currently, Minuette was walking to the post office to pick up a delivery; she missed the delivery pony all three times, for various reasons bordering on understandable--such as not being home--to completely idiotic, like singing too loud in the shower to hear the delivery pony banging on her door.
What Minuette didn't know, however, was that she could have avoided this whole situation if she just signed the back of the little slip of paper the delivery pony left on her door every time. That's how they work, you know; the delivery pony leaves the paper saying "I was here. and you weren't" on the door, and the recipient just needs to sign the back and take it back up and next time the pony arrives, they'll accept it as a signature and leave the package.
Knowing if half the battle, as they say. Speaking of, I have no idea where our protagonist is for this chapter. Let me see... Ah! He's... he's... oh, oh that's embarrassing. It seems our hero was currently trapped in Minuette's plot. How the devil did he end up there?
I'm joking, of course. I know full well how he got there, but it was just so mundane that it's hardly worth mentioning. Still, I suppose you're interested all the same. You wouldn't be here if you didn't want to see, after all...
Todd's day started, as most days do, with the simple act of waking up. That, unfortunately, was the end of the normalcy; you see--that's a pun, wait for it--the moment he opened his eyes, he discovered that seemingly overnight, they had become incredibly sensitive to light. The sunlight--normally a pleasant thing to wake too, even for the Humans stuck in Equestria--was more like a flash bang had gone off right in his face. With a scream he clenched his eyes shut and buried his head into--oh hey, a chair! Remember my lesson from the Starlight Chapter? In case you missed it, it was to avoid chairs.
More importantly, did you get the pun? Todd couldn't see, and I said "you see", so... hm, now that I say it out loud I sound like an idiot. That's not even a pun, is it? Now, if I said his eyes became incredibly see-nsitive-- oh dear, okay okay, we're doing this over, hold on!
The moment he opened his eyes, he discovered that seemingly overnight, they had become incredibly see-nsitive to light. The sunlight--normally a pleasant thing to wake too, even for the Humans stuck in Equestria--was more like a flash bang had gone off right in his face.
Damnit, I ruined it. Lets just get back to the matter at hand, shall we? Todd was on a chair in Minuette's home--a place, if the cobwebs on the wall and copious amount of dust were any indication of, that drastically needed some TLC. I wish I could tell you that his sense of vision was the only thing affected, but if I'm nothing if I'm not honest; the scream was a bad idea, the sound echoing and pounding in his ears as though someone shot a pistol right outside them. As his ears rang and eyes watered, his muscles screamed with every move he made--cramping and throbbing, making it impossible to so much as stand let alone avoid what was about to happen.
In the distance, probably only a few feet away really, Todd heard what sounded like a series of explosions going off, each one closer than the last. Little did he know, that these explosions were nothing of the sort, but were simply the hoofsteps of Minuette--our antagonist, I guess?-- walking into her living room, a cup of coffee floating beside her in the shimmering azure glow of her magic.
Just like Todd, Minuette had only just woken up, and was looking forward to just sitting down, sipping her coffee, and going about her hum=drum day to day. I'm sure she would be horrified--and a bit embarrassed--if she knew that as she plopped her cornflower blue ass down on her chair, that a sentient, currently blinded created was slammed into her tail hole in what was probably one of the most painful experiences in its life.
Luckily for Todd, his smell was no affected like his other senses were, so while the smell was an overwhelmingly noxious aroma of horseapples--that's the G rated word for horse-shit, in case you didn't know--mixed with the almost sweet, yet still pungent stench of pony sweat and... do I detect a hint of lavender? Yes, and a greatly faded scent of lavender body wash--by the way, have you ever wondered how clean an Equestria Pony's rear is? Its a strange question, I know, but they don't wear underwear, and whenever they sit down their backdoor exit is bound to touch the upholstery.
Kind of gross to think about, really; what if they didn't wipe, and they sat down on your brand new white couch. Personally, I'd be furious with them, but luckily for Todd Minuette was--as I would expect--diligent in her cleanings. Sure, an asshole was still an asshole, but at least it wasn't a dirty one, right?
Todd, being unable to appreciate the silver lining in this otherwise dreary situation, only wanted to get away. The air wafting from Minuette's ponut had already entered his lungs, and try as he might he could only hold his breath for so long before his treacherous body demanded he take yet another gulp of the foul smelling substance, grimacing as his taste buds picked up a bit of her flavor each time.
He desperately wanted to move, to find some way to get out of the tragic situation he found himself in, but it was no use. His body, which was in pain before he was sat on by a four hundred plus pound mare, was no screaming in every way imaginable; not only that, but he would have to climb down from her anus back to the cushion.
Did I forget to mention that? Yes, Todd was actually stuck to the walls of Minuette's plot, not just beneath it. Every now and then the thick muscle of the pony's sphincter would twitch, sending a wave of both pain and revulsion through the tiny human's body. He knew, even without his eyes, where he was; the stench, the somewhat slimy, rubbery surface, the fire like heat that radiated all around him--and if that wasn't enough to tell him, he could hear the distant rumbling above him, the sounds of Minuette's bowels as they slowly processed something he definitely didn't want to be around for when it came out.
He didn't know he was under a mare, nor a pony. He just knew one of those giants had sat down on him, and he was now stuck to one of the most disgusting parts of their body as they--unknown to him--simply drank their morning coffee.
Several minutes past before Minuette finished her coffee. With a simple sigh the mare finally stood up from her seat--not only saving the tiny man beneath her from his very near suffocation, but also taking him with her--and trotted to the kitchen to deal with her mug before heading out for the day.
I'm sure she had all kinds of wondrous things to do; perhaps she was going to meet up with Lemon Hearts or Moondancer, maybe she was going to get a good book, or maybe... hell, I don't really care what she was planning for the day, because all of that changed when the little slip of paper fell from her door saying "hey, remember that thing you ordered? You have to come get it now!"
"That's kind of a bummer..." expressed Minuette. Oh, the things she had planned, ruined by a missed delivery. Anyway, that's more a less how we got to where we were when we started. With a bounce to her step, the mare hummed along her way with a sickeningly positive outlook on things, while the tiny man stuck in her back door did everything in how power to... well, not die.
Each step Minuette took was a nightmare for our blind hero; the sway of her hips, the constant motion of her hind legs moving back and forth in rhythm, the unconscious clenching of the pony's plot seemingly at random--It was all Todd could do to keep himself not only safe within the fetid rectum he had the misfortune of finding himself in, but also keep himself from going deeper.
He already made that mistake once; in his desperation to... honestly, I don't know what--escape? Just see where he was with his own eyes? Regardless of his reason, he tried to open his... hm, I just used eyes, I don't want to use the word again so soon...
Shortcut; the light wasn't any kinder to him outside than it was in. Blinded and in pain, Todd shied away from the light, but in doing so he accidentally sent himself tumbling backwards into the hole. Gone was the barely present scent of lavender soap, replaced completely and utterly by the musky, pungent stench of the mare's rear.
But there was a bright side to his new position, and in these sorts of dilemma's you really need to find the positive where you can--he no longer was constantly assaulted by a mix of the cold, winter air and the sweltering, humid heat of Minuette's body. Now, he was only subjected to one temperature; hot.
If I might be honest with you here, I'm legitimately impressed he hasn't thrown up. The smells I've described would be bad on a normal day, but imagine it at that size, while feeling the flesh of a giant, unknown being's anus constantly shifting and clenching around your body, the taste of it whenever you breath in or open your mouth.
And just look at him! He's coated in a greasy film--and it isn't from his sweat, no that was all natural mare covering him--and it only got dirtier the deeper in he went. He couldn't move, couldn't see--he quite literally was in the hands of fate right now, and if previous adventures with humans and giant ponies were any indication, that was a very fatal position to be in.
Luckily for Todd, he wasn't going any deeper than he already was, which was good since it took a few more minutes of walking before Minuette made it to the post office.
"Hey, I'm here to pick up a package?" Said Minuette to the incredibly bored pony sitting behind the counter. A few minutes went by before Minuette was able to take the package, but as her magical aura wrapped around the box it was all she could do--you know, I never understood that saying, I mean I get what it means but it just sounds so weird. It was all he could do not to sneeze, all he could do not to become a turtle, all he could do to--
It was all I could do to keep on topic, it seemed. What did we miss? Oh, Minuette was jumping up and down in joy. Heh, I bet Todd is just loving that--I bet it feels like some nightmarish carnival ride to him.
"You have no idea how long I've been waiting for this!" Exclaimed Minuette, levitating the box to her forelegs and embracing it like a long lost child. "This is probably the best. Day. Ever. HEE~"
Thanking the pony for their help, Minuette--heh--skipped back outside. Oh goodness, the agony this must be causing our tiny protagonist in his current condition must be excruciating. I'm not going to pretend you don't know how this isn't going to end, so I'll just come out and say it; Todd probably isn't going to make it out of this situation alive. There you go, ending spoiled, the door is right over there.
For those of you who believe its the journey and not the destination that matters, you'll soon discover that the last part is truly an embarrassing way to go. That rumbling Todd heard within Minuette earlier was acting up again, only this time it was getting closer--like an earthquake was heading straight for him. Not only could Todd hear it, he could also feel it; the constantly twitching flesh surrounding him seemed to vibrate as the sound grew closer.
Todd wasn't an idiot, he knew exactly what was about to happen. Perhaps it was due to this knowledge that he was able to find the strength not only to stand up, but to wal--walking? Seriously, he can't manage something a little more desperate than a casual shamble? Well, it should come as no surprise that he wasn't able to escape, than.
It happened too fast for the man to even register; the mare's plot puckered as the hole expanded to a size more fitting for the explosion of gas that erupted from her depths. A reeking wall of heat and moisture slammed into the man with the force of a freight train--not literally, if it did than he would have been turned into soup from it--and within the span of a second Todd was sent flying from the Mare's rear where he gravity would bring him to a quick and merciful end.
At least, that's what you would expect, but the sickness that was infecting humanity wasn't all grit and no shine. As soon as the putrid gasses hit him, Todd's eyes shot open to allow all the world's unrelentingly bright light to burn into his skull. He saw something, an outline in the distance, and as if he expected to be able to reach it, he held his hand out, and vanished.
Well, teleported would be a better term; it wasn't the same as a Unicorn's magic, there wasn't any flash to indicate what happened or burst of magic to dump him out on the other side covered in soot--seriously, where does that even come from?--but instead it as though he phased from one spot to another.
Unfortunately, due to him being mostly blind and all, he was unable to tell that the outline he saw was not salvation, but was in fact the very same place he was just shot out of like some sort of human canon ball. Even better, all of this happened in such a short amount of time that Minuette's back door hadn't finished closing back up yet, and by some cosmic joke he found himself inside of her.
No, he didn't wind up in her colon if that's what you're thinking, but if we were to use a regular system of measurement for regular sized equines, he wasn't even a centimeter away from the horrors that lie within the pony's intestinal tract. Not that it mattered--Todd was too deep inside of her to escape again, and the act of teleporting had left him completely and utterly drained of energy.
He didn't even have time to notice just how filthy it was this deep within the giant pony before the muscles of her sphincter closed around him, trapping him in the middle of all that slime and muck without leaving enough room to so much as twitch. He tried to scream, to move; his insides--finally--lurched at the feeling of bile and sludge smearing into his body. Ugh, I'm actually feeling a bit noxious myself.
Was this it for Todd? Was he destined to suffocate inside the very end of a pony's plot, trapped among the waste that was too deep to be cleaned as she went about her day completely unaware of what had transpired? The answer, surprisingly, was no. While that very well could of happened to him, all it took was one more clench on the mare's part to crush our hero into paste, and within minutes he was no more distinguishable than the rest of the filth that surrounded him.
Minuette continued trotting home, at one point even breaking into an uplifting musical number that was aided by almost every random pony she passed on the street. I don't think I need to mention the fact that she was completely oblivious to what just happened, but I feel it necessary when wrapping up a story like this.
Now, if you're the sort of person that wants more, close your eyes... picture Minuette on the toilet... and do the rest yourself--because that is a chapter for another day.
Oh! Almost forget the lesson of the story! Lets see... I had one when I started, what was it? Was it to always look before you sit? Don't get sick, and if you do make sure it leads to magical powers...? You know what; I'll leave you with those two choices and let you decide for yourself which one to take to heart.
Ah, smell that winter air... Winter Wrap Up is just around the corner, I can feel it! You know, its a shame Humanity couldn't be brought to Equestria in the Summer. Ponies running about left and right, the oppressive heat of their Princess's sun bearing down on them, making them all sweaty--not to mention all the summer activities that would be going on. And the bugs! Ugh, the bugs... revolting little things. I guess what I'm trying to say is that there would be so much more going on, you know? Oh well, you didn't come here to hear me prattle on about the seasons--you came here to hear a story.
And this one, is quite... well, its actually kind of gross.
It's only been a few days since humanity had been granted magic, and like children who have yet to touch the top of a burning stove they still haven't learned when to use it, and when to leave it be. For example, using their new powers to form tiny splinters from the floorboards to use as spears, or transmuting the fibers of a carpet or from hair that had fallen from the ponies into clothes and packs. These were all very good examples of when magic should be used.
And that wasn't all; remember in our last chapter, when the main character's body and senses were all overly sensitive? Well, I'm going to skip the exposition--because honestly, who has the time for that?-- and just tell you what's happened there. They could see much further distances, could hear things that were much further away, and they're bodies were stronger, faster, and more durable. I mean, they weren't going to survive being stepped on or chewed, but it was better than being squishy and fragile, right?
There, now that that's out of the way I can finally get to the crux of things. This story is going to take place in Ponyville--or, to be more specific, in the home of Vinyl Scratch and Octavia Philhar--wait a minute, when did her last name become"Melody". I have nothing against the name, in fact I rather like it by itself, but I much prefer Philharmonica as a last name than that.
You know what, I'm just going to make this easier for everyone involved and stick to a first name basis. Really need to double check these things before I start a story... Lets see, Vinyl's and Octavia's house, bedroom, argument between... ah! Okay, that's the only issue.
As Vinyl and Octavia slept, two humans were currently in a heated debate on a shelf that held a rather impressive array of vinyl records.
"That's fucking stupid, Jim, and you know it!" Johnny and Jimmy; they were two of the lucky ones, brothers back on earth when they wound up in Equestria they were actually together. As of right now, they were separated from the rest of their group due to Jimmy's rather... well, it wasn't a bad idea per se, but--oh, Jimmy's going to explain it in a second so I'll just let him tell you.
"We need to get their attention!" replied Jimmy, "Before now we couldn't do it, but we have powers John! We ca--"
"I'm not going to let you teleport into their ear, man! You'll be too tired to get back out--and what if they don't hear you? What if they already know we exist, but just don't care? What then?"
"So you think we should just keep surviving like insects without even trying to get their help?!" Jimmy walked up to his brother and gave him an anger fueled shove with his meaty, disgusting hands. Well, they were just regular hands but... ugh, you have no idea how boring it is to just Narrate! Sometimes I make fun of them, you know, but they never respond... Anyway, back to the argument.
"Yes!" Johnny yelled, shoving his idiotic, fat brother back. That was a lie, he wasn't fat, I just don't like him. Hear that Jimmy? You suck!
...
See? Nothing. Oh, darn--I'm distracting from the story, aren't I? Well, I'll summarize for you; Jimmy and Johnny went back and forth like this for a few more minutes, but eventually Jimmy got tired of it and, without so much as a warning, vanished from his brother's view.
"Ji--god damn it, Jim... I hope this plan of yours works."
Johnny gave one last glance towards the sleeping ponies--by the way, actually relevant here, this was the first time humanity was actually able to make out the entire pony. Needless to say, they weren't too happy to find out the giants were adorable, colorful ponies--and walked back to the group.
Several miles away, Jimmy reappeared in a vast, white forest somewhere on Vinyl's ear. His brother was right; teleporting, no matter the distance, always left humans weak. It took everything out of them, so it should come to no surprise that instead of trying to find the entrance to Vinyl's ear, Jimmy simply lay there like a bottom who refuses to do anything while you bust your ass trying to give them the night of their life.
A few minutes passed, and Jimmy was out like a light. Fun fact; pony ears were not only adorable, but at the proper size they made for lovely beds; they were warm, soft... well, that was it really but do you need anything else from a bed? The man slept for several hours before finally waking up, and though he couldn't see it through the forest of fur the sun was just starting to rise. Octavia was actually already awake, but Vinyl... well, does she really strike you as the type of pony to wake up at the crack of dawn?
"Fuck, how long was I out?" The human muttered as he rose to his feet. He was till tired, but this close to his goal he easily overlooked it and started towards... well, he was going towards the ear's opening, but for the life of me I have no idea how he knew which direction it was in.
Several minutes passed, than an hour, then two. The experience of walking through a ponies fur was a surreal one; each strand of hair stretched from the rubbery, pink skin into the sky like it were some strange kind of tree. The smell was strong, but not so strong that it was sickening. It was actually impossible to put into words--seriously, I have idea how to do it. You'll just have to imagine what a pony's ear might smell like if it were an entire landscape on your own.
Eventually, Jimmy reached the cave that made up the mare's inner ear. While he was initially prepared to go inside it, when he came face to face with it he began to have second thoughts. This wasn't just some hole he could crawl into, it was a chasm; a vast abyss that was long enough that he could easily imagine it were a lake devoid of water.
Not only that, but this close to the source he was able to smell it as well; it was a thick, bitter-sweet odor that would undoubtedly grow worse the further in he went. Still, he came this far, so with a gulp he leaned over the hole, took a deep breath, and yelled as though he were being chased by a Lion.
Whether by coincidence or because she actually heard it, Vinyl's ear twitched. While this was a victory for Jimmy, the violent shift of his landscape carried with it a heavy price. The man, not suspecting the ear to actually move, was sent falling into the sleeping mare's skull. His screams for attention became screams of fear, only interrupted by his grunts of pain as he hit, stuck too, and proceeded to fall from several buildups of wax before finally landing against the wall of Vinyl's ear drum.
This noise wasn't lost on the mare, either. With an annoyed grumble Vinyl sat up from her bed, rubbed the sleep from her eyes, and looked at the clock.
"Ugh, 10AM? I'm going back to sleep..."
She would not be going back to sleep, however, as by some chance of fate her charcoal maned roommate had walked by just in time to see the mare sitting up.
"Vinyl! You're up early. There's breakfast in the fridge if you’re hungry, and since you're up you can help with some of the chores." Octavia gave the other mare a 'you aren't getting out of it now' smile before continuing to wherever she was going beforehand. Groaning, Vinyl crawled out of bed and grabbed her headphones from the table. There was an annoying... squeal? Ring? Well, whatever noise a tiny person makes when in an ear, it wasn't one Vinyl was enjoying, and the sooner she could drown it out the better.
I'm not even going to get into how those headphones even work; they aren't connected to anything, and I doubt Equestria has invented WiFi. A puzzle for a wiser man than I, I think.
Jimmy, unaware that he was about to be bombarded with probably the worst genre of music in recent history besides country, continued to scream and shout for the giant mare's attention. I'm not going to lie to you, he wasn't having a very good time right now; he was sore from his landing, and before he could get his barrings Vinyl sat up, and in the process made him once more fall--only this time he landed face first in a mound of earwax that was likely twenty times larger than he was.
He made the mistake of screaming while falling too... his mouth was full of the stuff; ugh, the bitter taste of the yellow substance was ungodly. I don't know if you've ever tasted earwax, but it's not something you really want. And at the quantities that he was tasting? I doubt you'd be surprised to hear he vomited up whatever he could.
Just made things worse, though. Earwax and vomit--maybe its just me, but I'd take the plot of a pony over the ear. Something about earwax just makes me wretch--and the fact that he was not only covered in the thick, sticky substance, but was forced to taste it too! That's not a fate I'd wish on anyone.
For a few moments he desperately tried to get the mare's attention. He called, he screamed, he cried--but while the pony was indeed able to hear him, what she heard was so unintelligible that she mistook it for just noise, noise in which was soon drowned out by the aforementioned dubstep she was so fond off.
It was as though Jimmy was trapped in a tunnel as a staccato of explosions blasted into him with all the shock waves and pain you would expect. His own eardrums were quick to burst, but even worse was the vibrations; each note, each beat of the song now only shook him to his very bones, but also shook the walls of Vinyl’s own ear. The mount of wax he found himself in shifted in rhythm with the music; his screams of pain and fear were drowned out not only from the noise, but from the tomb of wax that was slowly pulling him into it. Eventually, the tiny human's screams were snuffed out completely, as he was completely buried in Vinyl’s earwax before suffocating within the disgusting substance.
Outside, Vinyl simply bobbed her head in time with the song, eating a cold omelet while brooding over the fact that she had to help Octavia do whatever chores there were, oblivious to the fact that her ear was now the burial site of one Jimmy the Human. At least, it would be until she eventually cleaned them out.
Jimmy's group had abandoned their hope of seeing him after the mare had woken up, as well as any hope of getting help from the giants. Perhaps, in the future, they'd meet a similar fate. But that's a chapter for later, right?
And what might the lesson of this story be, you might ask? The lesson is that sometimes you are beneath another's notice, and that by trying to get it you might end up buried alive inside their ear while they listen to terrible music, no more closer to getting it than you were before. You might want to write that down.
I'm going to try something new; I'm feeling a bit rushed today--being a Narrator is very busy work, you understand--so I'm going to just give you the story and go do... I don't know, Narrator stuff; enjoy.
Eighteen people were currently trapped in Shining Harmer's roller skates. They didn't know how they got there, they didn't know why they were there, and they certainly didn't know how much worse it was going to get. The earthy smell of hoof mingled with the pungent stench of sweat, and while it was oppressive the air wasn't anything they couldn't get used too.
In case you didn't know who Shining Harmer was she--well, she looked like Princess Cadence, and she was a derby pony.
The people weren't stupid, they'd been in this world long enough to know never to trust an uncertain situation, and despite the language barrier that separated the humans from understanding each other one thing was ingrained in their beings, and that thing was survival; whether a pony was walking towards them, making something to eat, using the bathroom, or anything else that qualified for Slice of Life, each one of these things and more promised death to anyone who wasn't constantly aware of their surroundings.
Those with magic tried to teleport to the opening, those without attempted to climb. All of these acts were met with the same result; failure. The magic gathered to teleport exploded as soon as it reached a usable level, not only wounding those attempting to do it but also maiming them; their flesh boiled and burned, bones fractured and broke, and those who managed to teleport never reappeared.
Magic wasn't going to work, but what about those climbing? They weren't going to make it out in time--they were slow, their movements clumsier than they should be, and eventually they too gave up. Magic didn't work, and they couldn't seem to be able to rely on their bodies to get them out, so they did what any reasonable person would do; they began to discuss any and all ways they could escape, while at the same time trying to calm and assist those who had harmed themselves with magic.
But any attempt at deliberation was broken as the skate began to move. People screamed in terror and pain as their world lurched from one point to another, the light funneling into the cavernous interior of the skate was blotted out by a giant mass of flesh and fur, and with a sound that rivaled a rock slide pouring down from a mountain the giant hoof slipped into the snug confines, heedless of the screams below.
Shining Harmer had a game to get too, and one by one she slipped her hooves into her shoes before she glided out into the ring. She lived for this; the cheers of the fan ponies, the beating of her heart at the prospect of her match--it was times like these that made her proud to have her Cutie Mark be what it was.
What she didn't expect, however, was that beneath her hind leg was a bedlam of screams ranging from fear, to pain, to abject horror--each of which grew as that hoof hit the ground to propel her movements. Over and over again, the people within her skates hope for survival slipped further and further from their brains, and in its place despair set it; when Shining Harmer's hoof hit the bottom of its skate, several things happened.
The first was that people died. Everyone watched the skies, even as the light was consumed and their world was cast into darkness, their heads pounded from the noise and bodies vibrated from the feeling of the hoof scraping against the walls. These things were negligible, though--they all happened too fast for anyone to really notice. What they did notice was the landing; even to their tiny ears they heard the brief screams of pain and the crunch of bone and muscle as the mare's weight fell on the few unlucky enough to be under her frog.
Those close enough even felt the sticky warmth of blood beneath them, spraying their faces and drenching their clothes as the pressure made those beneath it pop like zits.
The second thing that happened was the G-Forces hitting them. As Shining Harmer pushed herself forward, those in her skate were violently thrown back, flung against the roof of her frog, slammed back into the ground, then tossed towards the front of her hoof. It was a cycle with precious little in the way of reprieve, and only those with magic were able to hold their ground. While they couldn't gather enough to teleport, they could use it as an adhesive to bind them to the skate's floor.
Those unlucky enough for that only had their newfound resilience to keep them safe, but even that had its limits when your brain was being rattled around in your head like a hacky-sack, and boulders that were undoubtedly only tiny pebbles to the mare rained from her hoof like tiny meteors, pelting--but not killing--the unlucky few beneath them.
The third thing that happened was the attack on their senses; each time the Mare's hoof hit the floor the clack of the wheels brought with it a continuous eruption of noise for those trapped above. The air reeked with the smell of dirt, mud, and hoof as the heat that poured from the surface of the pony's skin continuously amplified each and every scent. Each thing, each breath the people made and impact they felt, each time they were tossed around or struck by stones, and each explosion of sound that threatened to tear open their ears repeated upon itself over and over and over again.
By the end of the first lap, there were only five people still alive. To make matters of survival even more bleak, Shining Harmer's acts had started to make her sweat; the air grew humid, each breath the survivors took of the pungent effluvium clung to their tongue, throat, and lungs-- it only took a few more moments before drowning began a genuine concern.
The atmosphere was becoming unlivable. The moisture from Shining Harmer's hoof soaked into the bottom of the skate, the oxygen the humans were using to breath had been completely replaced with the stale, cloying fumes as the heat grew more and more unbearable. The few who had survived as long as they had were running out of strength, and as the salty liquid began to pool at their feet, drench their bodies, and invade their mouths it was only a matter of time before something gave.
The first one's magic failed, and she soon felt her body fly back and break the concentration of another, where both slammed into the slick bottom of Shining Harmer's frog and found themselves glued to the boiling mass. Two down, three left.
Another simple collapsed from exhaustion, though unlike the previous two his magic gave out long ago. He only remained where he was because he had used his last bit of magic to partially sink himself into swamp-like sole of the skate, holding him in place even as his consciousness gave way to oblivion. Two left.
Those two... they held on the longest, but for their reward was no less fatal than those who fell before. Drowning was not a way anyone would truly want to go; the bitter fluids that pumped from the mare's pores flooded the two completely, and as their bodies automatically tried to take in the toxic air in some vain attempt to breath, they're lungs filled with the sweat and within a few seconds they two faded from their world.
Shining Harmer's team managed to win, and she never did realize the sole of one of her skates had become a graveyard for the humans she inadvertently murdered.
Hm... that seemed to lack some flair, in my opinion. I think the lesson of this story is... always check before you put your shoes on? Eh, I'm sure that's good advice for someone.
When Did They Wrap Up Winter? (First Person, Adventure, Insect Vore, Nasal Vore)
Hm... what? What happened? I just closed my eyes for a second wh--oh dear god, is it already Spring?! I skipped an entire season?!? Well... that's just embarrassing. Did anything good happen while I was away? Let me just check the story and I'll, uh, I'll...
Well, I'm going to be completely honest here, I don't remember the story at all. Something about... tiny people, I think? I remember it was Winter, lots of death--magic happened, somehow, and... where the devil did the last chapter go? Oh, this won't do at all--no, not at all. Tell you what, since I've completely forgotten the majority of this story, I'll leave you in the capable hands of a temporary Narrator! I hear first person is all the rage these days, so I'm sure it will be to your liking. Now let’s see, the story started with an unexplained explosion of magic...
We weren't prepared for the Spring. While winter was cruel and unforgiving, at least it limited the threats we had to endure; the giants, the weather, the search for food... it was so much simpler back there. My name isn't important, In fact I doubt anyone will be alive to remember it besides me--for now, just call me Anon.
When the giants--or gods, as they seem now--forced Winter to shift into spring, we originally thought it a blessing. No longer were we shackled to the chains of our titanic tormentors, but were free to escape and maybe--just maybe--find a place to be safe.
Then they appeared. The burst from the earth, the walls, even from the skies; Chittering, armored horrors--foul smelling monstrosities sent from hell itself! They looked like the bugs from our world, only they were bigger, more expressive. They're eyes held a sick intelligence as they regarded us and... and...
There was so much blood! My friends, the family I have come to know and love, all of them were just.. globs of meat to them. When they attacked, I was one of the first to try and defend my home from their invasion--I used my magic to form spears from the minerals of the earth, even as my brothers and sisters attempted to use their own spells to tear the beasts apart piece by chitinous piece. We eve managed to take down a few, but there were just... so many of them.
The man I thought of as a father was the first to go. The insect didn't even chew him, just sucked him down it's gullet like air before moving onto the next, then the next... not all of them made it down in one piece. The thought of my friends being eaten alive was bad enough, but the image of those swallowed whole being digested by a bug alongside the bloody slurry of those who were grinded up first was...
I threw up, and I wasn't the only one.
"Retreat!" I heard someone yell through the chaos. We had lost just about everyone; It had only been a few minutes, and we took some of those bastards with us, but more and more kept coming. A few took the advice and popped from existence--hopefully somewhere safe--while others, myself included, magicked themselves a pair of wings and flew off into the sky.
A few minutes passed before we finally started to let our fight-or-flight instincts die down. Those things were probably ants, but I'll never know for certain. Hell, they may have been something completely alien to the insects from our own world--one thing was certain though, while the giants were likely unaware of our presence, and as such were probably killing us by accident, those things knew full well what they were doing. I could see it in their eyes when they looked at us, they knew full well what they were doing.
A blast of wind slammed into me, knocking my controlled flying into an uncontrollable tailspin that lead to a rather painful impact against... something. Despite the pain, whatever it was I landed on was actually quite soft, if not a bit porous and bumpy. It was a vibrant red color, and stretched off a good ways in the distances before meeting up with another plateau, that even further looked as though it met with another.
The air surrounding it also smelt amazing--if I had to guess, I'd say I landed on some sort of flower. Unfortunately, I couldn't enjoy it; in the distance, where I was flying, a massive flying insect was making dives at the survivors of my colony. While I couldn't see it happening, I knew that with each pass the massive bug--a dragonfly, from the looks of it--was devouring the people I cared for more than anything.
Weak, helpless, and alone I did what any sane person would do. I curled into a ball and cried.
I don't know how long I lay there--minutes, hours--but eventually I found the strength to get back up. I felt... drained, numb. I briefly wondered if those who teleported away were safe, and if I could maybe find them. I gazed into the sky, determined to find any survivor's that may ha--
My world was suddenly thrown into a chaotic pull as my body violently flew from the flower's petal; I only had a moment to see the vast cavern above me, a forest of white surrounding its dark depths before I vanished within the warm depths of the gaping hole. I thought I would never stop ascending, and in hindsight I wish I didn't; my travel was abruptly stopped as I felt my body fly into a thick, viscous substance as the warm floral scented air continued to blast past me into depths unknown.
A few seconds later, the air rushed out in bursts the same way it went in, a deep, bassy sound echoing from both deeper within and from outside what I guess was one of the giant's nostrils.
This wasn't right! I was going to find my people, find some semblance of life in this horrible shitty world! Not... not end up in a giant creature's snot! I struggled, tried to move my arms and legs, but to my growing horror I found that not only was I too weak to move in the pool of mucous, it was also oozing over my body! My scream was one of horror, fear, and disgust all mixed into one--it only intensified as the world suddenly shifted, and my body was slammed by a mass of G-Forces before once more growing still.
Alone, I remained within the nostrils of the giant being, lamenting the fact that I would never know if anyone else survived the day even as the slime the walls began to consume my body, both drying and burning my skin before hardening over my body and encasing me as though I were an insect trapped in amber.
A cream coated mare by the name of Roseluck finished inhaling the scent of one of her namesakes and smiled at the mare that grew them, Daisy.
"You did really good this year, Daisy." The raspberry maned mare said. "They smell absolutely delicious! What did you do differently?"
Daisy, a pink green maned mare, grinned in response before answering with a wink. "That's my own secret, Rose--you're gonna have to step up your game if you wanna beat me this year!"
The two mares laughed, as they often did, before their jubilation was cut off by an approaching dragonfly. At first the two mares simply stared at the passing bug, before Daisy--as she was often known to do--completely overreacted.
"AHHH! Is it coming to get me? I think it's coming to get me!"
And Rose, always the faithful friend, quickly followed suit with:
"Oh, the horror! The horrrror!"
The two mares, terrified of the approaching dragonfly for reasons I'm sure only they knew, collapsed on the ground, either feigning unconsciousness, or legitimately out for the count--I'm not sure, nor do I really care. The dragonfly, after casting the two a befuddled glance, continued on its way to find more prey to fill its hungry belly.
Ah... it's good to be Narrating again. I stopped paying attention to the other guy as soon as he said his name was Anon--I mean, really? Anon? Do people just not put any thought into their names anymore? Oh well, he's probably gonna wind up in a tissue somewhere and thrown away, or swallowed, or whatever happens to things that get sucked up our noses.
Anyway, the moral of this story is... hm... I suppose the moral is that sometimes its better to just stay inside, because when you go outside, you and your loved ones will be devoured by insects. Well now, that's good advice for anyone I'd say.
Ah, the Rodeo. I wish I could say I had fond memories of them, but the only one I do have involves me being incredibly bored. I don't even remember the Rodeo itself, just that I wanted to be literally--and by literally I mean figuratively--anywhere else. That level of apathy, it seemed, was absent the day Buffalo Bull's Wild West Show rolled into Appleloosa.
Ponies and Buffalo of all ages wanted to see the show. Perhaps it was the thrill of seeing ponies perform, perhaps there was a colt or mare who had a thing for one of the Troupe members--regardless of the reason, the show was booked well before the ponies had finished setting up.
You would think such a scenario would be on the humans' list of "top ten places to avoid", but to the three humans currently hidden away within the light brown coat of a mare named Apple Cherry, this was exactly the sort of event they lived for
I mean, they didn't know a rodeo was going on, obviously. While one may think psychic powers would be the next step to magic, let us remember that a certain purple dragon believed he could use his mind to set fire to things before briefly coming to the conclusion that mind-reading was right around the corner.
So, the point I'm trying to make is psychic powers are--damn, I forgot to pause the story again! Let's just get on with this before we miss something important.
I want you to do something; I'm going to paint you a picture, and I want you to visualize it exactly as I say. Ready? Okay. Imagine you're standing in a massive forest; no matter which direction you face, or which way you go, the only thing you'll see are strange, limbless trees. There is no bark, no leaves, in fact the only thing tree-like about it is that they're growing from large indents in ground--which, in this particular scenario, is a pale, rubbery terrain cloaked in shadows.
The reason for the lack of light is that these trees are so numerous, so close together, that only the faintest rays of light can shine through to illuminate the landscape.
Now in your mind, I want you to touch these trees; they have no bark, but they're porous--rough, yet surprisingly smooth to the touch. But there's something else, besides the trees; you're feeling hot--why is that, you may wonder? The reason being is that the landscape is constantly radiating heat--as though the summer sun is somehow rising from the ground instead of beating against it. Each step you take is uneven, bumpy, and it feels as though the ground beneath your feet is beating--as though it were alive.
Every so often, a large sphere of water--roughly the size of your midsection, I'd guess--will be pushed from this... bumpy surface, before trailing off towards a subtle, downhill slope. Can you see it? Are you there, right now?
I hope the answer is yes, because I'm going to want you to keep hold of that image for a while yet. You see, sitting beneath one of those giant trees were three humans--two of them boys, and the last a girl. Their hands were submerged in one of those spheres of water, a faint glow of magic lighting the thing up like a lamp as one after another they lift their hands to their mouths and send however much of the fluid they held down into their waiting bellies.
These humans, unlike those before them, were parasites. They had discovered ways to use their magic to live off other living things--a desperate act that, while safer in some regards to living in hiding, holds many other dangers that would make it impossible for a large group.
One of the humans ,Sara, made a face of utter disgust as she downed her handful of magically purified water before looking to her companions.
"We really need to find some way to change the taste, "she complained, "even if we can drink it, does it have to still taste like sweat?"
One of the other humans, Mike, finished his own mouthful before replying. "It's not so bad. It kind of has a sweet undertone to it, one that I think goes hand and hand with the salty, earthy fla--"
"Dude, you don't have to make it sound like a fine wine. It tastes like ass, and you know it." That one was Vince. I'd say he was the leader, but this particular triage was surprisingly independent. They traveled together, slept together, but none of them held any sway or power over the other. In a strange display of irony--given where they lived now--that it was almost the perfect picture of harmony.
Even as the ground beneath them began to tilt at a dangerous level, not a single shout could be heard--a groan of annoyance, yet, but no motion of sound of fear Their 'host' had sat down, and instead of letting themselves fall to deeper into the forest, the trio sort of hung there, their hands glued to the firm ground by a magic adhesion spell which, not surprisingly, was becoming quite popular among human populace.
"Think something's going on out there?" Asked Mike.
Sara let out a sigh of defeat as her head lifted to look up the endless forest above her. "The horse probably just sat down to eat or something." Idly, her eyes wandered back to where the sweat drop had been--then proceeded to follow the trail of moisture it left as it ran deeper into the coat. "Looks like our drink's gone. Wanna go see if something’s happening just in case?"
"Might as well." muttered Vince. "If nothing else, at least we won't just be hanging around, yeah?"
With a mutual agreement, the trio of humans gathered up their magic within their tiny bodies, condensing it within their backs, before letting it burst out to form beautiful, translucent wings. To avoid the danger of the newly awoken insects , the diminutive people remained close to the mare's body as they flew along the vast expanse of her back, dodging the various strands of fur and droplets of sweat as they flew higher and higher up, hoping that there'd be some event, some.... something, to keep them amused.
I think I already gave away what that was, but I've heard that sometimes the journey is just as important as the destination, and I'd like to think that this was one of those times. .
Apple Cherry, along the crowd of equine and bovine, stomped her hooves and whooped as the Rodeo got underway. Calamity Mane--a mare with a yellow coat and a mane sporting two shades of blue--was currently performing a series of impressive acts ranging from twirling through shrinking lasso hoops, to dodging bales of hay, to getting in a hogtying match with a background pony and, to nobody’s surprise, winning hooves down.
While the crowd was entranced with the show, the three humans living within Apple Cherries coat had flown up onto the dark brown Stetson hat resting atop her head. It was true that their current position may not have been the safest--after all, they were more or less completely out in the open--but humankind had a myriad of shortcomings, occasional bouts of reckless endangerment being one of them.
"Holy crap, did you see that? “Asked Sara. The tiny woman was practically bouncing where she stood, her two compatriots watching in amusement as their friend acted like an overjoyed child. "She threw that bale of hay at least... I don't even know! Ohhhh, I wish I could actually be one of those horses. They're lives seem so much better than humans." A beat. "Well, before we came here anyway."
"Speak for yourself" Expressed Vince, "Back on Earth, I had a nice job, was refurbishing my Grandpa's old Plymouth, and was thiiiis close to getting the girl of my dreams. " Vince held his figures just a few centimeters apart, before letting his hand drop with a sigh. "And now I'm living off dead-skin flakes, horse sweat, and the occasional crumb and drop of water."
Appropriately, Sara had no remark for this reminder of their miserable situation, and Mike simply watched the show and let the two sort out their own problems. It was truly a terrible life--they were living simply for the sake of living, though one could argue that moments like these, moments where they could simply sit and enjoy something, almost made it worth it.
Those moments, some might remind us, were fleeting and fragile things. Before the trio could enjoy any more of the show, a strong gust of wind blew across the town. This wind--while not necessarily strong to the ponies and bison enjoying the show--was strong enough to make the small humans lives take a terrifying turn. The hat which had been so snugly places on Apple Cherry's head was lifted from the mare and sent flying into the Rodeo's... stage, arena? I honestly don't know what the area the performers worked in was called.
Apple Cherry gave a startled shout and reached for the hat as it flew away, missing it just by a hair. The humans had it even worse; Mike and Vince, despite their best efforts, fell from the head wear even as Sara clung to the material with all the magical strength she could muster. The fall was... uneventful. The two men simply caught themselves with a flight spell and, while the fall was incredibly turbulent, Sara had managed to hang onto the hat until it's inevitable 'thud' against the dirt.
The trio, while separated, all laughed at the absurdity of it. No matter how simple a thing may be, at the size Humanity was reduced too everything was a threat; the fact that they were just blasted into the air, sent tumbling, and landed without a scratch was.. .well, as stressed as they were they found it rather hilarious.
As Vince and Mike descended towards the hat, and Sara let go of her spell and shakily stood up, the trio heard a noise that humans had learned to fear almost as soon as they arrived. Mike and Vince noticed it first--the thunderous, rhythmic beat of the pony's hooves crashing into the ground. One-two-three-four one-two-three-four--the sound of an approaching Equine meant one of two things; either you were somewhere potentially lethal, or you should be somewhere their hooves couldn't reach you. Mike and Vince were safe, Sara though...?
Well, she was about to have a really bad time.
The sight of the approaching mare left the poor girl frozen in terror, and as the yellow, unimaginably long legs of the Rodeo mare came to a stop in front of the hat. While that alone would be justifiable in rendering a tiny, helpless person paralyzed it was not actually the thing that caused her heart to pummel at her ribcage, or her veins to pump acid throughout her body. Oh no, what cause that feeling was the rapidly approaching muzzle, its mouth opening to allow the women to see the glistening cavern that lay beyond.
Calamity Mane's mouth was absolutely cloaked in shadows; the sunlight, bright as it was, was not enough to illuminate her maw. Every single detail Sara could see--from the strands of saliva stretching from the roof of her mouth, to the writhing, terrifying tongue that flattened itself to the mouth's floor as it grew ever closer to its target--was made all the more dismal by the pure blackness that consumed the cave. She felt her body dampen as the humidity of the pony's breath washed over her, blowing away all signs of fresh air and replacing it with the carbon dioxide filled stench of peas, carrots, radishes, and and assortment of other vegetables combined together to make something foul.
And then the source of that smell, the very opening leading into the pony's depths, clamped around both the rim of the hat and Sara, and before the girl could so much as scream--though she did manage as it happened--the platform of material she was sitting on catapulted her into the roof of the mare's mouth and gravity shifted the piece of apparel downwards.
I'm not sure if you know this, but Saliva is actually somewhat sticky. It's a thing with mucus I think, the body is.. .well, gross like that. Sara, though she may have known this herself, was experiencing it firsthand as the pony's bodily fluids glued her to the roof of the massive equine's mouth.
As Calamity Mane opened her mouth, allowing the hat to fall in her waiting hoof outside, Sara knew that this was it. The scant light that was afforded the tiny girl shined past the mare's lips, illuminating the glistening, organic walls of her maw; she saw the light pass over the bumpy, slick surface of the mare's tongue, the pools of spit that... well, pooled beneath it. As time seemed to slow, and the terrifying muscle lifted from its place and began to rise towards her, she knew this was it. The game was over, the screen was marching down from ten, and she had no more change to keep playing.
She thrashed, she screamed, and she cried, but no amount of struggling could prevent the mare's tongue from slamming into her, breaking her free from her saliva-induced prison as a blast of hot, humid air washed over her, the booming unintelligible sound of the pony's speech pounding mercilessly into her body as the organ beneath her tossed her around like a tic-tac.
Saliva filled her mouth, forced its way down her throat and into her belly even as she gagged and wretched in a futile attempt to purge the thick, viscous liquid from her own depths. The taste... that smell that clung to every surface in this cursed place, to the girls very body, was very reminiscent of the Vegetable Soup her mother used to make her when she was a kid.
And then, body sore from her very literal tongue lashing, the worst thing that could happen happened. The continuously growing pool of saliva--now a lake to the poor girl nearly drowning in it--began to be pulled further back into Calamity's mouth. By some convenient stroke of misfortune, Sara's mind refused to grasp any of the spells it knew even as she grew closer and closer to the mare's esophagus.
Remember now, there was no light in Calamity's mouth, no luminescence to allow Sara to see where she was going. Imagine being trapped in pure darkness, the hot, muggy air tainted by the reeking stench of pre-eaten vegetables as a current of thick waters pulls you closer and closer to a fall you can't even see. Then, when gravity takes hold of your body and the current carries you down into the depths you feel the slimy, mucus lined walls of your prison clenching around you with enough pressure to make your bones creak as it forces you down through slime and clumps of food bigger than you are in what would no doubt be the worst seven seconds of your life thus far.
That was Sara. That was what our heroine was forced to endure before being suddenly and violently ejected through the bottom of the esophagus into one of the most hostile environments you could find ever find yourself in. Every one of her senses was bombarded by the atmosphere of the pony's stomach; the heat--which was already unbearable in the mouth--was a constant barrages slamming into her pores, roasting her as the source of it produced more and more with every step it took.
The sound of churning, gurping, sloshing and bubbling mixed with the rapid-fire beat of the mare's massive heart from somewhere deeper within her body while the soupy, digested remains of numerous vegetables were constantly pushed and squeezed around in the fleshy blackness of Calamity's gut, producing a reeking, vomitus odor of gastric fumes and homemade soup that forced Sara to finally purge her stomach of the saliva it was forced to ingest just moments earlier.
The acid was the only thing the small girl was spared from; as soon as she was expelled from the mare's esophagus, Sara finally managed to cast a spell--that spell, it seemed, was one for flight. Wings that would only serve to hold off the inevitable held Sara aloft within the digesting organ, the acidic mess below sloshing dangerously close as not only did the stomach constantly keep it moving, but the pony's movements outside made it slosh from one part of the stomach to the other.
She would die here, she knew, but she didn't truly accept it as a fact. She had survived for so much longer than everyone else she knew, suffered indignities that even now flashed through her mind like a slideshow of shame, all for it to end inside of one of those monsters that were slowly bringing her race into extinction?
A burbling, more distinct and louder than the others, sounded from beneath her and before she could so much as question it, a rush of hot gas surged up from below, catching the tiny human and sending her flying back up the way she fell. A burp, a simple expelling of air from the stomach, sent the tiny girl once more sprawling against the wet, bumpy surface of the pony's tongue. Sunlight shone through into the cavern as the gas blew out from the pony's muzzle into the fresh daylight beyond.
Sara lay there, her body coated in saliva, mucus, and bits of food--her mouth tainted with the taste of vomit and the scent of digesting flora bleached into her nostrils. The light danced across her slime covered body, teasing her with its natural warmth and inviting radiance... and then once again the mare closed her mouth, and tossed her tiny prisoner back down her waiting gullet
Again she felt the muscles shove her through filth, again she felt her bones creak and body ache, and once again she fell into the mare's roiling depths. She didn't catch herself this time; despite having avoided the acids on her first visit, this time Sara was unable to stop herself from falling into the turbulent sludge. Almost immediate the churning of the pony's stomach pulled the girl under, and while she didn't feel anything at first beyond the squelching muck of liquefied vegetation enveloping her body from all sides as the forces of gravity once more took hold and began pulling her down. That feeling was soon joined by a tingling, and then a burning.
Sara spent her last few moments in unimaginable agony, her body being digested away within Calamity Mane's small intestine even as acids that were so ruthlessly breaking down her body were slowly being neutralized by the bile being produced within the mare's bowels. The only exit from Calamity's body for Sara, it seemed, would be the rear.
As the female member of the trio was undergoing all of that torture, the other two could only watch in silence as the giant equine picked up their platform and carried it back to its owner.
"We have to go after her..." Muttered Mike. "She... she could still be in the horse’s mouth, right? We just gotta pull her out..."
Even as he said this, Calamity Mane resumed the show, galloping further and further away from the two flying humans as she began performing another one of her tricks.
"You know we can't do that." Vince placed his hand on Mike's shoulder, watching the Equine use her tail to do some trick with her lasso. "It’s just the two of us left, now. We try to go in after her and we'd just end up the same way."
They didn't really care about the show anymore, but with the mare's tail twirling above her she was unwittingly reminding the two that eventually their friend would be unceremoniously purged from her body, along with anything else that she may have eaten beforehand.
Broken, and with a friend less, the two humans reluctantly flew to safety, leaving the various equines and bovines to enjoy the rest of the show without them.
Phew... that was actually rather exhausting. Believe it or not, I had actually planned on all three humans to survive this one but, heh, fate decided to take a different path. The lesson here is a very important one, I think: Always be careful what you wish for, and never wish to be something or someone you aren't, because that something or someone could eat you and make it much more literal than you actually intended it to be.