Cupcake?
My dear Frodo :
You had once asked me if I had told you everything there was to know about my past adventures….
And while I can honestly say that I've told you the truth, I might not have told you all of it. I am old now, Frodo, very old indeed. I am not the same Hobbit I once was.
It's time i told you everything that happened. It began long ago...in a land far to the east, the likes of which you will not find in this world.
It was in the city of Dale. It's markets known and wide, streets of vine and vale. Peaceful and Prosperous; for this city stood before the greatest kingdom of middle earth...Erebor.
King Thror, Mightiest of dwarves, king under the mountain and the leader of many. Thror ruled with the greatest surety...knowing that his kingdom would endure...ruling with his son and grandson at his side.
Ah, Frodo. Erebor.
Built deep within the mountain itself, as strong as it's legend. It birthed precious gems hewn from rock, and great seams of gold that ran rivers through stone. The skill of the dwarves was unequaled, crafting things of great beauty. Things of diamond, bronze, jade and Rubies!
Then they struck it. The heart of the mountain...The Arkenstone. King Thror took the stone as a sign of his power, to prove that his right to rule was divine. And all would pay homage to the dwarf ruler, even the great elven king Frandil.
But these times were not to last...The days quickly grew sour, and the watchful nights closed in on Erebor. Thror's love of gold had grown too fierce. A sickness took root in his mind and spread like a fire… and where sickness thrives…
Bad things will follow.
"We're apples forever, Apples together...Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmmmmmm-Hmm!" A certain yellow coated pony half whispered and half sang on her simple journey alongside her best friends. "No matter what comes, mmm mmm mmm hmm! We're Appllles to the coooore!"
Scootaloo smirked a bit. "Applebloom, you sure you don't wanna sing in any talent show?"
"Yeah!" Sweetie Belle offered encouragingly. "I can see it all now! 'Equestria's got talent'!"
"I don't think anypony's gonna name a show that." Applebloom shrugged. "An' I'd like ta leave the singin' to th' professionals anyhow!"
The unicorn frowned sourly, only to perk up a few seconds later. "What is that song anyways? Where'd you learn it?"
"Oh, Ah jes' learned it from mah family when Ah went on a trip! Ironically, Pinkie wuz with us!"
The reason for it being ironic was simple: The Cutie Mark Crusaders were on the way to Sugarcube Corner for their weekly visit and volunteer help, in which they'd deliver or help pack things or simply help cook cakes. Such was a part of their self-given duties.
"Huh. So it's a song about your family?" Scootaloo received a few nods. "Oh...I wish we had a song like that."
"...The ooother place that Ah'd rather be, is being with Scoots and Sweeeeeetie!" Applebloom randomly made up and did a little dance to go with it. Her friends giggled at such a sight. "Ah don't know what else to say in this song, Ah''ll end it all right heeeeeeeere!"
Sweetie Belle was the first to calm down from her laughing fit. "Gee Applebloom, you have the voice of an Angel!"
"Maybe the voice of Angel BUNNY." Scootaloo snickered, making her red maned friend roll her eyes. "Oh come on! That was a good pun!"
"Funny! We're about to talk with the Queen of puns! "
Applebloom politely opened the door for her friends before they all trotted inside to catch Pinkie rummaging behind the counter. The pink pony abruptly looked up and over the counter, staring worriedly at the CMC. "Uh, Hi girls! Have you seen Gummy?! I've been looking everywhere for him!"
The fillies all looked to their right, where the small alligator was sitting obviously in the middle of the floor. He blinked both eyes at them, mouth closed as usual. Pinkie gasped dramatically and zipped over to scoop up her pet. "GUMMY?! What I did I say about scaring Mommy like that?!"
Gummy bit her on the nose.
"...Aw, you're right! I can't stay pouty at you!" She giggled and turned around towards her volunteer workers, alligator still attached to her nose. "Hi girls! I see you three are ready to attack the day!"
"Yes, Ma'am!" The three of them said in unison.
"Great! But it's going to take an eeny meeny second!" Pinkie explained, dashing behind the counter before slowing to a halt and walking into the kitchen. She returned, balancing a very big cupcake on her nose until she managed to set it on the counter. "I got this cupcake from a friend of mine, but If I'm being completely honest, I'm not exactly in the mood for a cupcake today."
"You," Scootaloo gasped as loudly as possible. "Not in the mood for a CUPCAKE?!"
"I know." Pinkie shook her head, Gummy swaying dangerously. "I'm so disappointed in myself. But when your tummy says no, you do too! Unless you really want to...Anyways, I'm gonna find someone to give that cake to in a sec."
The Crusaders gazed upon the cupcake again; eyeing the odd blue color and the purple hue of the icing. It wasn't unusual to see a pastry this color of course, so they weren't at all suspicious of the colors. But none of them seemed more interested than Applebloom herself: the cupcake looked as if it had been magically changed by a zap apple! And zap apple cupcakes would undoubtedly be the best. "That's sounds nice of you, Pinkie!"
Pinkie smiled widely as she stepped into the kitchen. "It does! I'm going to do a little remodeling because an accident that may or not have happened recently! No big deal!"
"That's okay! We'll just...watch this cupcake!" Applebloom turned to Sweetie Belle. "Okay! Get the cupcake!"
Scootaloo raised an eyebrow. "Are you crazy? She said she was going to give it someone else!"
"Noooo, she said she hadn't decided who to give it to." The earth pony pointed out with a mischevious air about herself. "Which means that we kin still take it! Besides, this is Pinkie Pie! She won't get mad, right?"
"No, but...Whatever."
When Sweetie Belle reluctantly levitated the cupcake down to their level, the fillies gathered around the pastry eagerly and each one took a small bite out of the cupcake. They chewed on it thoughtfully, but their expressions proved what they thought of it.
"...Tastes... Kinda funny..." Applebloom coughed and swallowed.
Scootaloo swallowed soon after. "Yeah...it's a little...sour?"
"Yeah!" Sweetie smacked her lips. "It's like some kind of...pickled cupcake."
A slight crackling sound began to them began to sound, and for some reason the lighting within the room grew a bit darker. The Crusaders looked up in confusion and found that s series of flickering lightning bolts were forming an oval on the ceiling. The three of them squealed in surprise, immediately hugging each other as a reflex. The oval of lightning surged around itself quickly and began to suck in huge amounts of air into a dark hole at the center.
"HEY!" Sweeitie Belle flailed helplessly; her body was being sucked upwards by the force of the electric whirlwind. Applebloom grabbed onto her forelegs, but soon they both were being drawn into the oval. Even as Scootaloo grabbed Applebloom and tried flapping her wings as hard as she could, the strength of the sucking air proved too great.
They gave out a series of screams as their bodies entered darkness.
Bruce grunted when the vehicle abruptly hit the gas station, back end first. He immediately heard the alarm bells ringing from his monitor and rushed turn them all off individually. The vehicle shook abruptly when something landed on the hood, causing him to look up from the screens to the doors of his car. They were abruptly ripped off by the strongest hands known to the world and tossed away on either side of the colorful figure.
Batman slowly stood to his feet, facing Superman with a glare worthy to be feared.
The alien grimly frowned at him, before speaking. "Next time they shine your light in the sky...Don't go to it. The Bat is dead: Bury it...Consider this Mercy."
Superman left his statement at that and turned around, about to leave.
"Tell Me...
He stopped his advance down from the car with those words, and looked back at the Dark Knight. Batman's eyes were angry slits focused upon him and him alone. "...Do you Blee--"
The sound of electricity slicing open the air was heard from his right, and soon Batman was rumbling backwards in an effort to avoid being hit by three colorful,screaming bodies. The strangely cartoonist bodies flew far out beyond them and suddenly disappeared in another flash of electricity. The heroes blankly stared at the space for quite some time, before Batman turned back to Superman.
"What was I talking about...?"
The four minutes of passing through worlds finally ended with them plopping down in the middle of a forest.
The unknown forest was very large given the only viewpoint they were in. All manner of creature could have been found out in this area:wolves, bears, cougars and other animals; predators to cancel out a few of the deer and rabbits they'd spotted. And along with these animals were things of great scenery: such as trees glittered with droplets of dew and mist, making them appear almost as if they were golden in the dying rays of sunlight. Blends of purple walked into the scene under the sun, chatting busily with hue of red that blended with the giant ball of it seemed on this particular sunset that there were three other hues...three particular young fillies trekking through the land, each one partially covered in mud leaves and their own personal feelings.
Applebloom glanced over at one of her best friends, Scootaloo, with a guilty grin, even if she was trying her hardest not to look at her. She, as well as Sweetie Belle, noticed their pegasus pal had been eerily silent for the past half hour or so. They hated silence from her; she was the more talkative and energetic filly most of the time. "...So, Scootaloo..."
Scootaloo didn't even glance over at her. The despondent girl may have narrowed her eyes even more, but nothing beyond that. Sweetie Belle frowned deeper and Applebloom shrugged at this.
"Wanna hear a joke?" She waited for the silence, her big orange eyes sparkling with amusement and a huge smile stretching her lips. There was still no official response, but she took that as a yes anyways. "...okay...so, two stallions walked into mah family's barn..."
"And th' third one ducked! Ha! Get it?"
"It's funny cuz th' other two ran into the side of the barn- the' wall...Y'know...th' bark kind…" Sweetie was making small gestures that begged her to stop, but she merely continued. "How about another joke, eh? I knew a pony with a wooden leg named Smith!"
Scootaloo's eyelid twitched spastically.
"...But he never would tell me the name of his other leg!"
"Woah!" Scootaloo tripped over a large tree root and landed flat on her face. The other crusaders yelped and quickly pulled their member gently to her hooves. The earth filly's face filled with determination not to laugh. "Are you okay?"
The Pegasus merely glared at her again."...Just so you know, I blame you for this."
"...I beg yer pardon?!"
"Girls..." Sweetie Belle tried pitifully.
"That's right!" Scootaloo gestured around them. "It was your idea to eat that stupid cupcake-PINKIE'S cupcake by the way! Now we're lost out here in the middle of nowhere! And my face is ruined! It's all muddy!"
"Geez. Applejack never gave me this kind of trouble...One! Yer face isn't completely covered in mud! Two! Yer the' one who agreed to eat it! I never made you do anything!" Applebloom muttered as she continued to glare at her violet haired companion. " Three! We're not lost! At least I'm not. I know where I'm going."
The unicorn of the group frowned deeper. "Girls..."
"No you don't."
"Yes I do."
"No you don't."
"Yes I do."
"No you don't."
"Yes I do."
"No you don't."
"Yes I do."
"No you don't."
"Yes I do."
"Applebloom, we've been walking for an hour" Scootaloo deadpanned. "...and in circles. Even Sweetie Belle can agree with me."
"Don't bring me into this now!"
Applebloom snorted and rolled her eyes. "You're just jealous of my navigation skills."
"Oh!" Scootaloo struggled to not laugh, her face svrewing a bit from such an effort. "Your navigation skills, hmm?"
"That's right! I am a complete expert at stuff lahk this!" She declared proudly." Or have you not seen my perfect grades in school?"
"...riiiight...Perfect." Scootaloo sat and crossed her arms with a huge look of doubt on her face. "So let me get this straight...You think you know your way out of here?"
"Noooo,I don't think I know! I know I Know!" Applebloom cutely declared and began walking off quickly. "Heres how this'll work: The first of us back gets to boss the other around and the last one has to do what they say...for two months! So prepare to make me whatever I want for...Idunno-yadda yadda days!"
"What? Wait! Applebloom! We shouldn't split up...not now..." Sweetie Belle called after her, but no reply as she disappeared from sight. She rounded on Scootaloo. "Great! If she gets killed, I'm gonna let you tell it to Applejack."
"Relax! I'm not gonna let her run off by herself!"Scootaloo grimaced at her friend's attitude. "Geez. You're not the slightest bit mad at her?"
Sweetie hesitantly shook her head. "Now's not the time to be mad at each other. We have to stick together."
Scootaloo inhaled and exhaled loudly. "Easy for you to say! You're not the one who's pretending like this never happened."
"Ergh, That Scootaloo! Thinks she's sooo much smarter than me! UGH! As if!" Applesbloom told herself as she stomped away. "Since when has she ever led us out of a forest, huh?! Exactly! Never."
She sighed suddenly and sat down on a very big log, her hooves sore from walking over a mile or two.
"Since when did she become a master navigator anyways? She's never even seen a carto...cat-o...uh...a map maker before…*sigh*...But she's been right before...maybe I was too rough on her...It wasn't her fault she came out here with me...*sigh*..." The filly grumped, bringing her knees to her chest with ease. She buried the bottom half of her face in her knees while her arms wrapped around her calves. "Some day this turned out to be."
That was when a small object took a slow tumble through some shrubs and ended up rolling to an abrupt stop by hitting the log. Applebloom yelped in surprise, but calmed down when she didn't see it move again.
"eh?" She curiously picked up the small object and frowned when she made it out in the dim light. It was a glass bowl, one with some rather detailed markings on it and a few dirt smudges. She wiped off the object of her leg and was just about to look at it again when she heard someone coming near her.
"A good napsack! Hah! This one is just fine. I didn't pack things down well enough is all. I should think to do better next time, if there is a next time…"
Finally, a figure crashed through the shrubs and promptly fell flat on his face. The figure stood up, revealing that he was impossibly short for his size, possibly only able to stand at the height of her bosom. He was dressed in a reddish coat, had a stern expression his face, had the largest backpack in humanity, pointed ears and to top it all off..incredibly large naked feet. The figure stared at her curiously, and Applebloom guessed that the weird creature was at least in his mid thirties.
He suddenly took notice of the bowl.
"OH NOW SEE HERE!" He abruptly ambled forward, and before she could move the bowl was snatched from her mouth. "That is MINE! It costed me a good sum of money."
"Ah...uh….Ah wasn't tryna steal it. It just rolled down to mah hoof." She explained, perplexed by his short size. Heck, she was 2/3 of his height for crying out loud. "Ah'm...Applebloom. Who exactly are...you?"
At the mention of her name, the figure looked a bit confused and looked her over up and down. He gave her an awkward curtsy, below raising an eyebrow. "...I'm Bilbo Baggins. One of the Hobbits that lives in the Shire?"
"Shire?" Applebloom repeated, perplexed. "What's a Shire?"
Bilbo shrugged half heartedly. "A town, you might call it. A Hobbit town...with Hobbits in it."
"...Hobbit?"
"You don't know what a Hobbit is?!" Bilbo asked incredulously, and the way he said it made her feel a bit dumb. It must've been obvious what a Hobbit was...some kind of two legged creature with weird hooves. "Sure, we're not the most well known people in Middle Earth, but some people have decent knowledge of us at least! Your parents haven't taught you about anyone here?"
"...Ah don't think my parents would know anything about this place." Applebloom explained. By this point she was on her hooves. "Ah...It's hard to explain...My friends and Ah came here after eating this weird cupcake."
Bilbo nodded in understanding, but was interrupted by said friends when they stepped out of a wall of shrubs. Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle stared at the Hobbit with same confusion Applebloom did, which caused him to roll his eyes. "I know, I know... You've never seen a Hobbit before."
"This is Bilbo. Ah just met him a few seconds ago!"
"Do you know which way is out of this stupid forest?" Scootaloo glared at her. "Because she obviously doesn't!"
Applebloom scowled right back. "Ah wuz close to findin' out!"
"Why don't we just let the nice Hobbit TALK?!" Sweetie yelped at the top of her lungs. Her friends quieted themselves, but didn't look at each other in the slightest. The unicorn focused on Bilbo, who was awkwardly shifting in place. "So, DO you know the way out of here?"