> Heaven Awaits > by Ayla > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > Chapter 1 What do you mean I'm dead?! > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Heaven Awaits By Ayla Chapter 1 What Do You Mean I'm Dead?! I've always had a bad life. It was dull, painful, and depressing. What I had no idea was my afterlife would be much more interesting. I've always been one to just stay at home, and I was completely unprepared for the journey that I was about to have. I've always thought that if I didn't have bad luck I'd have none at all. I was born sickly, I grew up in an abusive family, a lot of my so called former friends either betrayed or abandoned me, the only stallion I ever truly loved died in a carriage accident, and then I got the mental illness of bipolar disorder to top it all off. I wound up living off of disability, barely getting enough to make ends meet once I moved out and got away from my family. Being around a lot of other ponies makes me anxious, so except when I need to go out to buy groceries, I mostly just stay home. Pinkie Pie is my only real friend, since she manages to be friends with everyone. I admit that her visits do tend to brighten my days, and at least once a week I manage to go out and spend time with her and her other friends at her insistence. I have my good days and my bad days. I have to take medication every day to keep my mental illness under control. Rarely I get a highly elevated mood which I think of as a happy high. I mostly have depression and anxiety. The meds help some but not enough. I'm in limbo. Well enough to stay out of a mental hospital, yet not well enough to be a functioning member of society. I also have plenty of physical problems. I have a weak immune system, irritable bowel syndrome, allergies, asthma, and I'd had to have several surgeries to get organs removed due to infections and other problems with them. My weak immune system means that I get sick easily. If I catch something I tend to have it longer than most ponies. Not to mention I'd not feel well for a week both before and afterwards. The irritable bowel syndrome keeps me from eating anything very spicy, or else it will make me sick. Some days when it flares up I can barely eat, and I need to take medicine to make things calm down and only eat bland foods. The allergies I have are just ridiculous. I'm allergic to grass and hay for pity's sake! Not to mention a few other fruits and vegetables. I can't even eat peanuts or regular nuts. The allergies just make my asthma worse. The asthma makes it hard to breathe some days. All in all I was almost always tired and I rarely had much energy. Caffeine was my friend some days, giving me the strength I need to get things done. My little house is usually a mess. I hate to clean, I tend to be disorganized, and I don't usually have the energy for it anyway. I had tried to get a job before, but nobody wanted to hire a pony that didn't have a high school diploma. I'd dropped out when my bipolar got so bad I just couldn't concentrate enough to pass things anymore. I'd tried to go back three times, but by now my memory was shot. It was hard for me to remember a lot of things and I'd always have to write things down to remind myself about them. If I couldn't remember the answers, I couldn't pass the tests. If I couldn't pass the tests, I couldn't graduate. If I couldn't graduate, I'd have a hard time finding a job. Though with all the anxiety I have when I'm around a lot of other ponies, maybe that wouldn't be a good idea for me anyway. Not to mention I might end up getting fired for taking too many sick days. I get angry sometimes. I feel like I've never gotten a true shot at life. If I'd just had a loving supportive family, if we hadn't been poor, If I hadn't been sick... If I'd just had ONE of those things my life could've been so much better. If I'd had money I wouldn't have to worry about making ends meet. If I'd have been healthy I'd have been able to finish high school, maybe even college, and get a good job. If I'd had a good family to help me I wouldn't have cared about either of those things. Such is life. Life is like a game, and some of us lose early on. Oh I know I could be much worse off. I could have cancer, or I could be starving, or homeless, etc. I know that, and I do try to appreciate what I do have. It's just hard to do with that depression regularly coming back to haunt me. This particular day I could hear a lot of a ruckus going on outside. Something about Matilda's wedding being today when it was supposed to be tomorrow. I'd been sent an invite, but I know it was only them being polite. I wasn't true friends with anyone in Ponyville but Pinkie Pie, and that suited me just fine. Thanks to everything I'd been through I tended to have trust issues. I also heard a monster attack going on, and I looked out the window seeing Pinkie and her friends fighting it. I just shrugged. Things like this happening around here was pretty common by now. I sat down in front of my mirror and brushed my brown and white mane and tail before braiding them so the hair wouldn't tangle when I lay down for my nap. I then grabbed my other brush, my coat brush, and brushed my yellow body, carefully smoothing it over my eighth note cutie mark. I had always loved to sing, and everypony had always told me that I had a good voice, so nobody was surprised when it turned out to be my talent. It was fitting, since my name is Meadowlark. My parents had been inspired to name me that since my colors had matched that particular song bird when I was born. Before I'd gotten this depression I'd considered becoming a professional singer. But now that I have all these anxiety and health problems I know that's just a passing dream. Professional singers have to travel a lot, and be around a lot of other ponies. I knew that my health and frayed nerves would never be able to take a life like that. Sometimes I hated myself for being so weak. Sometimes I felt if I just tried harder maybe I could get something accomplished, but I was always so afraid that I'd fail. I've failed so many times already. I shook my head as I thought about all these things. There was no point in dwelling on them. This was my life, such as it was, and parts of it I couldn't change no matter how much I wanted to. Thinking about it would only make me feel worse. That was why I always tried to keep myself distracted with something. I tended to read a lot. When I was reading the only thing in my mind was the story instead of my own morbid thoughts. I was tired. I hadn't slept well last night and I knew that a nap would do me good. I lay down and got under the covers, grabbing my stuffed rabbit and holding it. I know it's childish, but I can always sleep better when I'm holding a stuffed animal. All the noise outside soon started to annoy me so I grabbed my headphones and put them on, putting on soft music to use as a lullaby. It blocked out the noise outside and soon I drifted off to sleep... When I woke up I was confused. I seemed to be in a forest. It wasn't dark and creepy enough to be the Everfree, but it wasn't a bright and cheerful woods either. I looked up and saw that the sky was partly cloudy. My brow furrowed as I got up and I felt my wings ruffle. Wait a sec... wings?! I looked and sure enough, I had wings. I was an earth pony! What was I doing with wings?! I spotted a sort of glowing over my head and tilted it, seeing a glowing golden ring floating above it. This has got to be a dream, there was no other reasonable explanation. It was strange though, ever since I started taking all that medication I rarely remembered dreaming. I especially rarely have a dream this vivid. I could smell and feel the grass under my hooves. This felt odd too. My allergies were so bad I tended to not be able to smell things very well, and with all this grass, normally I'd be sneezy and itchy if I stayed outdoors too long. Then again this WAS a dream. After a moment I started walking. Eventually I started hearing voices, and I quickly picked up my pace. I didn't try to use my wings yet, I didn't know anything about flying after all. I finally came upon two mares, a unicorn and pegasus talking to each other. As soon as they saw me they looked very surprised. "What are you doing here? We don't normally get angel ponies here," said the unicorn. "Um... where IS here exactly?" I asked. This wasn't any place I'd ever been to before, I knew that. "This is Limbo of course," said the pegasus. "Limbo? That's an odd name. Do you live in a village or something nearby?" I've definitely never heard of a place called Limbo! "Oh dear, you don't know do you?" The unicorn looked concerned. "Know what? Why are you two looking at me like that?" I was starting to get nervous. "If you're here, that means that you're dead." The pegasus said simply. "Wha...? No that can't be. This is just a dream!" I frowned. Was this dream turning into a nightmare? "A dream? So you last remember going to sleep?" Asked the unicorn and I nodded. "Well then I'm sorry to tell you that you must have died in your sleep somehow." "But how could I have... I was sickly I know, but I wasn't THAT sickly!" I protested. "Think," urged the unicorn. "Was anything unusual going on today?" "Not really. I mean there was a monster attack but Princess Twilight and her friends were fighting it." I remembered. "Maybe this monster killed you somehow?" The pegasus suggested. "But that's impossible! Nobody has ever gotten seriously hurt during a monster attack before!" But even as I tried to deny it I thought about the bad luck I've always had. I swear my cutie mark should've been something like a pony walking under a ladder! I face hoofed big time. "It just figures that I'd be the first. This is so typical!" The unicorn and pegasus exchanged glances. "So you just died and now you're here? That's odd." The unicorn sounded worried. "Why's that?" I sighed. "Because with those wings and halo you're supposed to go to pony Heaven. Someone should have showed up to take you there but well, you're here." The unicorn said. "Are you telling me that not only am I dead but I'm LOST?" I demanded. "It sure looks that way." The pegasus shrugged. "Oh... shiitake mushrooms." I grumbled. > Chapter 2 The Infinite Information Station. > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Chapter 2 The Infinite Information Station The pegasus laughed at my words and the unicorn gave her an annoyed look. "What? It was funny!" While I tried to get my scattered wits in order, I took a closer look at the two in front of me. The pegasus had a white coat, a sky blue mane and tail, sky blue eyes, and a sky blue silhouette of a laughing pony head for a cutie mark. The unicorn had a golden brown coat, amber eyes, an orange and red mane and tail, and an open book with an orange cover for a cutie mark. I closed my own chocolate brown eyes for a moment to steel myself against whatever lay ahead. "So... this is Limbo." How ironic, I thought. I'd always felt like my life was in limbo, and now in death that's the first place I ended up. "Yup! I'm Giggles, and this is my friend Autumn!" The pegasus grinned at me. "Nice to meet you, though I wish it was under better circumstances. I'm Meadowlark." They seemed like ordinary ponies to me. How had ponies like them ended up in Limbo? After a moment I decided to ask. After all, what else was there to do? "So how did you two end up in Limbo anyway?" "Well the way the afterlife works is like this," Autumn began to explain. "Ponies who are good and have done mostly good in their lives end up in Heaven. Ponies who are bad and who have done mostly bad in their lives end up in Tartarus. Ponies who are neither really bad or really good who have done an equal amount of good and bad things in their lives end up in Limbo." "So we're all stuck here forever?" I raised an eyebrow. "Not necessarily." Autumn pointed at a sign at a tree and I went to look it over. Welcome to Limbo. You are currently in The Wildland of Regrets. The only way for anyone in Limbo to be admitted into Heaven is to manage to do enough good deeds to earn your way in. But beware, doing enough bad deeds will be a one way ticket to Tartarus. Have a nice day! "Seriously?" I muttered. "Oh! Oh!" Giggles started bouncing up and down excitedly. "Maybe we can help you find your way to Heaven!" "Really? You'd do that for me?" I'd been afraid I'd either be stuck here or have to try to find my way there myself. "That does seem like a good course of action." Autumn said thoughtfully. "After all you don't really belong here. Besides in helping you, perhaps that can count as a good deed for us." I nodded. That made sense. In helping me they'd also be helping themselves. That way everypony might win. Hopefully anyway. "We can head for the nearest Infinite Information Station." Autumn said. "They should be able to help us. It'll take a few hours of traveling, but it should be worth it." "Okay great." I replied, though I mentally sighed. So far Giggles seemed to have a fun loving personality while Autumn seemed to be more smart and bookish. Swell, I had here a Pinkie Pie with wings and a Twilight 2.0 "And on the way maybe we can stop at Looking Glass Lake!" Giggles chimed in. "When you look into it you can see what's going on back in the world of the living. If you want you can find out for sure how you died and what's going on there now!" "Yeah that might be interesting." Who had named these places anyway? So far all of them sounded like a bad punch line. So we started to walk. There were the normal things you tended to find in the woods. A few animals, some insects, even some berry bushes here and there and the like. The longer I walked though the stranger I felt. I kept remembering things in my life that I regretted doing. The times that I'd hurt or angered other ponies. All the times I'd done things I shouldn't. I finally stopped with a shiver. "What is it?" Giggles asked, tilting her head to the side curiously. "I don't know why, but I keep thinking of things I wish I hadn't done." I told her. "That's why this place is called The Wildland of Regrets." Autumn told me. "It's for the ponies who had a lot of regret in their lives. You get used to it after awhile and you only think of it sometimes instead of all the time." I could only groan hearing that. As we started walking again we started telling each other about our past lives. There wasn't much else to do but talk to pass the time after all, and it helped divert me from getting lost in my own mind. "I lived in Manehatten. I ran a joke shop." Giggles told me. "Some of my jokes other ponies thought were really funny, but other jokes some pones thought were mean." She looked down at the ground, her brows furrowed and her ears laid back, sounding a little sad. "I guess that's how I ended up here." "I was the secretary of Fancy Pants. I didn't do much with my life but read books and do my job. I suppose that's how I ended up in this place." Autumn added matter of factly. That got me to thinking. I had ended up here, but I wasn't supposed to be here. Or was I? After all I'd been an average pony with an average life, and I had never really done anything especially good or bad. Why hadn't I ended up here permanently? Maybe I WAS supposed to be here and the mistake wasn't that I'd ended up here, but that I'd ended up with the wings and a halo. I told them about my own life and they looked appalled at the things that I've been though. Giggles immediately started telling me jokes after that. I think she was trying to cheer me up. "Knock knock!" "Who's there?" I rolled my eyes a little. I'd long outgrown these types of jokes, but I knew that she was trying to be nice, so I decided to humor her for now. "A herd." "A herd who?" "A herd you were home, so I came over!" Giggles burst into well... giggles. Her name definitely suited her, that was for sure. "Why did the radish kiss the banana?" "I don't know Giggles, why?" "Because he had appeal! Get it?!" I tried to force a laugh to satisfy her, but she wasn't fooled. "Aw... don't you like my jokes?" "They're very nice Giggles, I guess I don't really feel like laughing right now." Not that I'd tell her, but I was more into dark humor most of the time. Eventually we finally reached Looking Glass Lake. Looking into the water I wasn't surprised that it was called that. It was so still and clear I could easily see myself in vivid detail. "So how does this work exactly?" "You look into the water and say something like I want to see a place in a city in Equestria or wherever it is you want to see." Autumn explained. I nodded. That sounded simple enough. "I want to see my house in Ponyville in Equestria please." A ripple went through the lake and after a moment I could see my old home... or what was left of it. Half of it had been smashed to bits. No wonder I'd been killed! Pinkie Pie was sitting there crying surrounded by her friends as a couple of paramedic ponies carried out a stretcher covered with a sheet. It was pretty obvious that there was a body... MY body, underneath that sheet. "I just talked to her yesterday!" Pinkie sobbed, her mane and tail flat as Fluttershy hugged her, tears going down her own face. I noticed that there were other ponies around, some of who were crying, had teary eyes, or sad looks on their faces with their ears drooping and I was surprised. Other than Pinkie I didn't think that anyone would shed tears for me after I was gone. I didn't think that anyone else would really care. "It's so awful." Rainbow Dash was staring at my house. "If we'd only been more careful to try to keep that monster away from other pony's houses." "Most ponies were either busy with the wedding or ran off when the bug bear got close." Applejack sighed. "Meadowlark was asleep with headphones on. She couldn't hear it coming her way." "We should have kept the creature to one area and made sure that area was evacuated." Twilight had an incredibly guilty expression. "I shall donate money to help pay for her funeral. I feel that it's the least that I can do." Rarity dabbed at her eyes daintily with a fancy looking handkerchief. "There there Pinkie." Fluttershy tried to console her. "I'm sure that Meadowlark is in a better place now." "I just hope that wherever she is... that she's happy." Pinkie Pie whimpered. I had seen enough so I backed away. The lake, as if sensing that I was done, turned clear once more. "Don't you want to see how your family is taking the news?" Giggles asked me. "I doubt that they even care, and even if they do, it serves them right. They were horrible to me." "But don't you think you should try to forgive them?" Giggles asked anxiously. "No. They helped ruin my life and they don't deserve my forgiveness." I said firmly. "Lets keep going." We fell silent after that and just walked, my somber mood seeming to infect the others. I don't know how long we walked, but when we finally reached the edge of the woods it was just starting to get dark. Off in the distance we saw the station, but it looked more like a large office. We opened the door and went in and I went up to the window where a bored looking green earth pony stallion was looking through some papers. "Excuse me. I hope you can help me." The stallion looked up and put on a professional smile. "Well if you're looking for information I can. Here at the Infinite Information Station we have all the information about the afterlife that you could ever need." "Well I think I might have ended up in the wrong place. I have wings and a halo and yet I woke up in Limbo in The Wildland of Regrets." "Name, date of death, and place of death?" "Meadowlark, today, and Ponyville." The stallion opened a drawer and started looking through files. After a minute he pulled one out and started looking through the papers in it. "Oh yes here's the problem. It looks like there was a mistake made. A dot was moved over in the wrong direction of how many good deeds you'd actually done, so even though you're marked as a good pony, you woke up in the wrong place." "Are you telling me I ended up in the wrong place due to a FILING ERROR?" I demanded. "It sure looks that way." The stallion shrugged, unknowingly mimicking Giggles from earlier. "Buck my life..." I groaned. "Language!" Autumn gasped sounding scandalized. "Isn't this the afterlife?" Giggles pointed out helpfully. "Whatever." I sighed. > Chapter 3 Through The Wildland of Regrets > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Chapter 3 Through The Wildland of Regrets Seeing how upset I was, Autumn took over the situation and started talking to the stallion to find out more. She seemed to know the right kind of questions to ask. I guess since she was talking one secretary to another that only made sense. Giggles started exploring the office, not that there was much to explore, and I went over to a mirror on the wall that I'd spotted. I always considered myself to be a rather plain mare, but my looks seemed to have improved since I've been here. I looked almost... pretty. The wings especially made me look more graceful and almost delicate. The wings looked a little different than normal pegasus wings I noticed. It was a subtle change, but it made them look more beautiful. They were a little bigger, the feathers more fluffed out and exotic looking. Autumn finally called us back over. Giggles trotted over with a bright smile. Nothing seemed to get that mare down. Seriously how had she of all ponies ended up living in Limbo? It was definitely a mystery. "Well Wordsmith here told me we have a choice. He said we can wait for a new pony to show up to take you to Heaven, or he can give us a map and we can make our way there ourselves." Autumn told us. "How long would we have to wait for a new pony to show up?" I asked. "Oh not too long, just a century or two, three at most." Wordsmith said cheerfully. "In the meantime if you wanted to wait here, you could help me organize and file papers. Wouldn't that be fun?" By now my right eye was starting to twitch. "Give us that map." A few minutes later we walked out of the Infinite Information Station, all of us now wearing saddle bags that Wordsmith had given us. Mine had canteens in them, just in case we ever needed water. Giggles had matches in hers, in case we needed fire. Autumn was carrying the map, a few booklets, ink, and a few quills and some blank pieces of paper, in case we needed to write things down. Our bags were mostly empty which meant they were light weight and easy to carry. "I haven't felt hungry or thirsty since I've been here, why do we need canteens?" I asked. "Because in some parts of the Afterlife we'll feel hungry and thirsty according to Wordsmith." Autumn answered absently, busy looking at the map that she held stretched out in front of her with her magic. "Here you don't usually get hungry or thirsty unless you want to be." Giggles told me. "Why would anyone want to be hungry or thirsty?" My brow furrowed. "Because some things taste super duper yummy! Mmm mmm!" Giggles licked her lips. "Oh... right." It was true that some things were a pleasure to partake in. In life I'd always been overweight, but ever since I got here I'd become slender. It was a nice change. I wondered if I started eating again if that weight would come back. "Why do you walk everywhere? You have wings!" Giggles pointed out. "I know but in life I was an earth pony. I don't have any idea how to use them." "I could teach ya!" Giggles flapped her wings a few times, hovering off the ground a few moments before landing again. "Uh... no thanks. I'm actually kind of scared of heights." I admitted. Actually I was more scared of falling. "Aw okay. Just let me know if you change your mind." Giggles looked disappointed. "Will do." I so wouldn't. "Okay so according to this map to reach Heaven we're going to have to travel through all of Limbo. It'll take days to get to the end of it, but at least then we can finally get you to where you need to be." Autumn looked up. "Better days than potentially hundreds of years. All right lets do this." I nodded. "Woo hoo! Road trip!" Giggles cheered. So we walked back into the Wildland of Regrets. Once again the thoughts of my regrets filled my mind, and after awhile they were driving me crazy! "It wasn't this bad before, what's going on? Why can't I stop thinking of the things I wish I hadn't done?" I asked them. "The deeper into the forest we go, the stronger the thoughts and feelings get." Autumn sighed. "We feel it too. That's why we were staying closer to the edge. It's not as bad there." "Yeah." Giggles nodded. "And as bad as it can feel here sometimes, there are other parts of the Wildland of Regrets that are even worse!" "People who live in Limbo tend to stay in the parts of it that resemble the way they feel the most." Autumn told me. "So you two have a lot of regrets then?" I looked at Giggles. "You always seem to be so happy. What things did you do in life that made you end up here? I'd have thought a pony like you would go straight to Heaven." Giggles' ears folded back and she looked at the ground. "Remember how I told you some ponies thought my jokes and pranks were mean? Well sometimes they caused a lot of trouble. Sometimes the things ponies bought from my shop, or the things that I did with them, made really bad things happen." "Like what?" I tilted my head. "Like it broke up relationships of all kinds. Friendships, coltfriends and marefriends, things like that. I didn't mean for things like that to happen! I guess some ponies are just really sensitive about things like that." "That wasn't entirely your fault." I pointed out. "I mean, none of your jokes ever really hurt anyone right?" "Not physically, but emotionally yes I suspect." Autumn spoke up. Giggles nodded in agreement. "Some ponies feelings were really hurt." "Well you didn't mean for it to happen right?" I asked. "Of course not! I want to make ponies smile and laugh. I never meant to make anypony sad, honest!" Giggles kicked a small rock away looking dejected. "Well, how many ponies were upset by the jokes and pranks? Most of them?" Giggles shook her head. "Half of them?" Giggles shook her head again. "Well then how many?" "Five." "Five? That's all? Five over sensitive ponies? And how long was your joke shop in business?" I asked. "Five years." "Five ponies out of five years, but all the other ponies found your products fun right?" Giggles nodded. "That's not too bad. What was it like one upset pony a year out of everypony else? Why do you have so much regret that you ended up HERE?" "Because five ponies is five too many! Besides... I didn't just hurt ponies with my jokes from the joke shop. Sometimes I accidentally scared ponies too much or upset them when I was growing up too." Giggles said sadly. "Some ponies just can't take a joke, but that's not your fault. You can't please everypony all the time. It's just impossible." I pointed out. "Really?" Giggles asked in a small voice. "Really." I nodded. "I concur." Autumn agreed. "Look! Strawberry bushes!" Giggles squealed suddenly. So we stopped to pick some for our packs. "So Autumn, how did YOU end up here?" I asked her as we worked. It was only fair, since I'd asked Giggles. Besides talking helped distract me from all my increasingly disturbing thoughts. Autumn sighed deeply and her ears flattened as a look of shame came over her face. "Remember how I told you that I was a secretary for Fancy Pants? Well... sometimes I... I took bribes from clients to do forgeries to the paperwork so that they looked more important than they really were. So that it would be more likely for Fancy Pants to work with them. I found out later that doing that cost other ponies jobs and oppurtunities that they might have had if it wasn't for me." "Why did you do that? Just for the money?" I asked. "I used that extra money for things like fancy clothes so I could look more like a high class lady instead of just some lowly secretary. I had dreams of attracting and marrying a rich stallion and being able to quit my job and live the good life. It was so very selfish of me." "And you? What things do you regret?" Giggles asked me. "I regret a lot of things." I admitted. "I regret not making more friends. I regret that I pushed ponies away and didn't let them in. I regret having so much sadness in my life and feeling bitter about my misfortunes. I regret not trying to do more. I regret hurting ponies feelings from being so sarcastic and rude at times. I'd probably need a whole book if I were to write down all my regrets." "Wow, that's a lot." Giggles blinked. "Honestly I don't know why I'm not supposed to be here." I shook my head. "Maybe the paperwork they have is wrong." "Wordsmith was positive that the only error was in the number of your good deeds." Autumn reassured me. "What good deeds? I stayed away from other ponies. I was a loner." I frowned, not able to figure it out. "Maybe you did a lot of good things and didn't even realize it." Giggles pointed out. "Maybe." I sighed. Soon we were on our way again. We stopped at Looking Glass Lake to fill our canteens when we reached it. When night fell we didn't stop. Apparently in the afterlife you don't need to sleep, and we never seemed to get tired. Autumn just lit up her horn to light the way and we kept going. It got a little chilly but not too bad. All the walking we were doing kept us from really getting cold. Once in awhile I'd look up at the sky. It was full of stars and I wondered if this was the same sky that the living saw. As we walked we did various things to try to keep our minds off our thoughts. We sang, told jokes, riddles, stories, and played simple games like I Spy and Twenty Questions. "So how many ponies end up in Limbo anyway?" I asked at one point. "Not many. Ponies are usually good by nature. We see other creatures here more often." Autumn replied as she jumped over a log. I jumped over it too, surprised that I didn't trip. In life I'd been pretty clumsy. Giggles just flew over it. Once in awhile Giggles would take to the air and flutter a few feet above us. I think she missed flying. It probably sucked for her that she had to travel with two ground dwellers but she never complained. "What kind of creatures?" I asked. "Gryphons, horses, donkeys, diamond dogs, dragons, etc." Autumn replied. We fell silent, but only for a few minutes. Too much silence promoted too much thinking. Soon Giggles started to sing and since it was a common song that many ponies knew, we both joined in. "You have a lovely voice." Autumn complimented me. "Yeah it's really pretty!" Giggles said enthusiastically. "Thanks." I managed to smile a little. Just as the sun was starting to rise, Autumn abruptly started trotting faster. "What is it?" I asked as Giggles and I hurried to catch up with her. "We'll be in the next part of the Wildland soon." Autumn explained. "Thank goodness." Giggles looked relieved. At my questioning look she explained. "In every different part of Limbo you get different feelings." "So what feelings will be up ahead?" I asked, feeling a little uneasy. Was it going to be just as bad or even worse than regret? "You're about to find out!" Giggles pointed with her right hoof and I looked to see the end of the woods and a place full of hills and valleys start. I sprang into a gallop and the other mares raced along beside me until we reached the top of the first hill and paused. Normally I probably would have stopped to admire the view, but I suddenly felt very impatient. "Come on lets go!" I began trotting down the hill quickly. "Onward!" Giggles cheered. "Foward!" Autumn said in determination. I sped up again and leaped over a small bush in my way. I landed on something, or should I say SOMEONE, because whatever I landed on screeched so loudly and shrilly I quickly put my hooves over my ears, losing my balance and tumbling down to the ground. "Oh dear!" I heard Autumn exclaim as she and Giggles rushed over. As I turned to see just what it was I'd landed on, the creature grabbed me and yanked me close with a loud growl. This close all I could see was a pair of extremely annoyed yellow eyes. "Hiya!" Giggles waved. "Oh I just love making new friends." "Not now Giggles." Autumn groaned. All I could do was gulp. > Chapter 4 The Ghost Gateway > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Chapter 4 The Ghost Gateway "Why don't you watch where you're going?!" The temperamental person screeched in my face before dropping me. As the creature moved away I could see that it was a gryphon. A female by the sound of the voice. I rubbed my ringing ears. "Sorry." I was glad that all she'd done was yell at me and not tried to rip me apart with her talons and beak. Sure I was dead, but that wouldn't have been pleasant, and considering how my ears felt, it seemed that it was still possible for me to feel pain. Autumn came over to help me up while Giggles bounded over to the gryphon. "Hi! I haven't seen you around here before! What's your name?" "Germaine." She answered sounding irritated. "Nice to meet you Germaine! I'm Giggles and this is Autumn and Meadowlark!" "Yeah that's great now if you don't mind I'd like to go back to my nap." Germaine rolled her eyes. "Wait... I thought we don't need to sleep anymore." I said in confusion. After all we'd traveled all day and night without having to once stop for rest, and I still didn't feel tired at all. "We can sleep and even dream if we want to." Autumn told me. "I was dreaming of hunting." Germaine gave herself a shake. Autumn looked nauseated at that and even Giggles looked a bit green at the thought of eating another living creature. I didn't see what the big deal was though. It isn't their fault that they are mainly carnivorous. They can eat other things of course, but they need to have meat as a main part of their diet. "Can you hunt for real in the afterlife?" I asked curiously. "Only non sentient creatures unless I want to end up in Tartarus." Germaine shrugged, though she looked a little impressed that I wasn't put off by her eating habits. "Wait a second!" Giggles rubbed her head with her right hoof. "How can you eat them if they're already dead?" "As soon as I finish eating them whatever is left disappears and the animal pops into existence again." Germaine answered casually. Autumn blinked at that. "I didn't know that. It sounds... strange." Germaine suddenly took a hard look at me. "What are you doing here anyway? With that halo floating over your head shouldn't you be in Heaven somewhere?" I sighed and told Germaine my story. By the time I was finished she was rolling around on the ground in laughter. "You... ended up... here... because... of... paperwork?!" It was my turn to roll my eyes. "Yeah yeah laugh it up." I was starting to get a little irritated myself, and I wanted to get moving. I noticed that the others were starting to fidget too. "Can we get going already?!" Giggles suddenly burst out. I blinked at her. "Whoa, you're usually so mellow. Are you okay?" "I'm fine, sorry. It's just this place." Giggles pointed at a sign stuck in the ground that I had missed until now. The Inland of Impatience. "So being here makes us feel impatient I take it." I raised an eyebrow and Giggles nodded vigorously. "Weird. Okay I guess we might as well get going then." We left the still laughing Germaine behind and went on our way. I think the others were relieved to be free of the meat eater. We made good time because since we all felt impatient we soon moved from a walk to a trot, and from a trot to an all out gallop. It wasn't until I saw a large strange tree that I slid to a stop. There seemed to be a glowing door on it, and there was a sign over it. Ghost Gateway. "What's this?" I asked the others curiously. "It's a portal of sorts." Autumn told me. "It lets you go back down into the living world as a ghost so you can see what's going on there if you wish." "That would be even better than Looking Glass Lake." I said thoughtfully. "Are you thinking of going through?" Giggles asked me. "Maybe. It'd be a break from constantly feeling impatient anyway. That's starting to drive me crazy." I said crossly. "Me too. I could use a break." Giggles nodded. "Well I suppose it couldn't hurt, but are you sure?" Autumn asked hesitantly. "What's the worst that could happen?" I asked as I reached out a hoof and pulled open the door. "How does this work? Like Looking Glass Lake did?" "That's right." Autumn nodded. "Equestria, Ponyville, my house." I stepped through the creepy looking glowing space and when I stepped out it was from the side of one of the walls of my house that was still standing. The others came out too after a moment. "We'll need to come back here to get back through, so remember where to go." Autumn told us and we nodded. Ponyville seemed almost deserted as we walked around. Why was everything so quiet at this time of day? It wasn't until we reached the cemetery that we saw that was where everyone seemed to be. It took me a few moments to realize that they were holding a funeral. MY funeral. Wow, that was fast. I'd only died what, yesterday? I looked around. There sure were a lot of ponies here! That was a surprise! Pinkie Pie was currently making a speech. "Meadowlark was sad sometimes. She was lonely, I think, but she wasn't sure how to make friends, so I became her friend. After we became friends and I introduced her to my other friends I saw her smile and laugh more often. She was a really great pony and a really great friend. She didn't like to go out much, but she always welcomed me into her home and we'd have fun together. Sometimes she even helped me plan some parties, though she didn't always come to them. But when she did, we all had fun. SHE was fun. I'll miss her, a lot." Pinkie sniffled and sat down. "Sometimes she came by and helped me with my animals, or she'd bring me an animal she found that needed help. She'd also pet sit. She was good with animals. She was so... kind." Fluttershy said in her soft voice. "She loved to read and we'd talk about books and sometimes she'd help me organize the library. She even donated books to the library a few times. She was so helpful and smart." Twilight told everyone. "She always cheered when she saw my tricks. She was a great fan." Rainbow Dash smiled sadly. "She helped babysit the girls when they needed someone to look after them when the rest of us were busy. She was great with kids. She was a real nice mare." Applejack sighed. "She loved my outfits." Rarity said wistfully. "She liked to wear them and her telling other ponies where she got them helped increase my business. She was such a supportive dear." "She was a fun babysitter." Apple Bloom said. All of the crusaders had tears rolling down their faces. I hated seeing them so sad! "She'd give us candy sometimes." Scootaloo sniffled as she wiped at her eyes. "She always had great ideas for us." Sweetie Belle was barely able to choke out. I stood there and watched in amazement as pony after pony came up to talk about me. Some of them I couldn't even remember their names, but all of them remembered me. "She gave me a spare train ticket she had when I needed one but couldn't afford to buy one." "She bought me food when I was hungry but I'd run out of money." "She told me she noticed signs of bipolar disorder in me and told me I needed to go to a doctor so I did. My life is so much better now because of her!" "I was so depressed I wanted to kill myself. She convinced me that it would be a horrible mistake and told me I needed to get help. She saved my life!" As pony after pony praised me and talked about things I'd done for them and I listened in shock, I suddenly felt a hoof on my shoulder. It was Autumn's, and when I turned to look at her and Giggles both of them smiled at me with watery eyes. "And you thought that you didn't do anything good and that you didn't deserve to go to Heaven." Autumn shook her head. "You helped so many ponies Meadowlark! So many! Some of those ponies look like they came all the way from Canterlot!" Giggles told me. "I did live in Canterlot for a few years at one time." I nodded. "You are loved, and you are missed." Autumn said softly. "Yeah..." I turned to look back at the funeral, feeling a glow of sudden warmth in my chest. "I guess so." "Autumn look! She's smiling! I think that's the first real smile I've seen from her!" I heard Giggles say in a hushed voice. "Indeed." Autumn agreed. I was more than just smiling, I was grinning so hard that if I'd still been alive, I think I would have strained something. > Chapter 5 Meet The Parents > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Chapter 5 Meet The Parents I started to look around slowly, taking everything in. The color theme seemed to be sky blue and white. Two of my most favorite colors. Even though I had a fear of heights, I've always loved the sky. It represented the thought of Heaven to me if I could ever get there. It represented peace even while I was alive. There were also plenty of roses, lavender, and daffodils, three of my favorite flowers. As I was taking everything in, I spotted a couple of late arrivals to the funeral and immediately bristled when I realized who they were. My parents, Rain Drops, a pegasus and Corn Field, an earth pony. To my surprise, Pinkie Pie interrupted the speech one of the ponies was giving as soon as she'd noticed them as well. "YOU! You two are NOT welcome here! Leave!" Pinkie shouted at them angrily. I'd never seen her so angry before. In fact, I don't think I've ever seen her angry at all, but right now she looked furious. "Excuse me?" My mother said indignantly. "We have the right to attend our own daughter's funeral!" All eyes were on Pinkie as she jumped down from the stage and stomped up to my parents. "Considering the fact that she disowned you both for ABUSING her I don't think you do!" Her announcement made everypony gasp. "I have no idea what you're talking about." My mother scoffed, though my father looked slightly worried. "I asked her once. Why didn't she ever go see her family? Why didn't they ever visit her? She told me EVERYTHING! I asked her why she didn't press charges and she said because you were too good at lying and she wasn't sure she had enough proof. Also she said going through a trial and trying to testify against you would stress her out way too much! So instead she just moved out and cut you out of her life!" Pinkie Pie pawed the ground with her right front hoof aggressively. "Oh please. We loved our daughter but she was such a drama queen. Always exaggerating everything." My mother tossed her head. Pinkie's eyes narrowed. "Oh? So what she told me about bringing a newborn kitten home that she'd found that it's mother had abandoned, and your husband yelled at her for trying to help it wasn't true? Then when you got home later you told her it smelled bad and made her put it outside in the cold when night fell and by morning it was dead? Despite the fact that she kept getting up all night and going outside to try to keep caring for it?" My mother was excellent at lying, but my father blanched. I jumped as Fluttershy's cry of fury and anguish echoed through the whole cemetery. "YOU WHAT?!" Fluttershy rarely got angry, but when she did, ponies tended to take cover. Even my mother backed up nervously when Fluttershy raced over and glared at them. "How could you DO such a horrible thing?! To both of them! If you didn't want the kitten you could have taken it to someone else to take care of it! Instead you deliberately let it die! Performing both animal cruelty and psychological torment on your own foal! You two should be ASHAMED!" "I... we... um..." My father stammered. "Oh please. It was dying anyway, which is why it smelled like that." My mother humphed. "What about all the times you hit her?" Pinkie growled. "I never-" My mother started to say but Pinkie interrupted her. "Don't LIE to me! You HIT her! You'd slap her face! You would also grab her leg hard enough to leave bruises! You'd punish her when she didn't deserve it and if she tried to stand up for herself you'd just punish her even more!" This time it was Applejack who joined them and got in my parents face. "No good parents would EVER treat their little filly like that! You two should be locked up!" "And you!" Pinkie switched her glare to my father. "Every time you went shopping for clothes you said that everything she liked didn't look good on her or made her look fat! So she'd finally give up and let YOU choose all her clothes! Not to mention all the clothes you chose for her were plain, old fashioned, and out of date! She hated those clothes!" Now Rarity joined the group. "How could you say such mean things to your daughter and force her to wear such atrocities! It was a crime against her and against fashion!" "You both rarely let her go over to other foals houses, and you discouraged her from bringing anyone to your home. You kept her isolated! It's no wonder she didn't know much about how to interact with other ponies!" Pinkie Pie continued her accusations. "You acted like most fun things were wrong and being an only foal it meant her only entertainment was playing with toys by herself and reading books!" It was Rainbow Dash's turn as she jumped to the air and flew over. "You two sound like the worst parents ever!" She grabbed a rain cloud and kicked it to make it start raining over them. "You have no proof of any of this!" My mother sputtered as she moved her wet mane out of her face. "Well I plan on looking for proof." Twilight Sparkle leaped off the stage and came over, scowling deeply. "Now that your daughter is no longer alive to have to worry about being stressed out by the inquiry." "Check with the bank and the places they shopped at first." Pinkie Pie told her. "Rain Drops kept stealing her disability money and used almost all of it for herself until Meadowlark moved out on her own." Twilight nodded to Pinkie before looking back to my parents. "I Twilight Sparkle, as your Princess, order you to remain in Ponyville until we get all of this sorted out. Due to the nature of this crime I shall be writing to Princess Celestia about it as soon as the funeral is over. Now I believe that Pinkie Pie told you that you aren't welcome here, so please leave." My mother started to cry. "Please! We tried to be good parents! We did the best we could!" "Stop it." Pinkie said firmly. "Meadowlark told me all about how you two know how to fake tears and crying to get everypony to feel sorry for you or to make them believe that Meadowlark was a liar. You fake cry, yet she told me that when she cried when she was a filly you'd yell at her so she learned to cry too quietly to be heard or to just hold it in. Your fake tears won't help you now!" My mother glared at Pinkie and opened her mouth but before she could say anything she was bombarded by shouts from other ponies at the funeral. "Foal abusers!" "Animal murderers!" "Thieves!" "Liars!" "Scum!" Some of the ponies grabbed food off of a table that was probably being saved for the reception after the funeral and started throwing it at them. My mother let out a cry of frustration and she and my father beat a hasty retreat. Rainbow Dash followed them, keeping the rain cloud over them the whole way. Twilight looked at Pinkie. "We can talk later. I want you to tell me everything that Meadowlark told you. No foal abuser is going to get away with it if I can possibly help it." Pinkie Pie nodded and my breath whooshed out as I abruptly sat down. After a moment the smile returned to my face. Even if my parents didn't get found guilty, they were outcasts in this town now. I wouldn't be surprised if they were forced to have to move elsewhere, and if this story got out to enough newspapers in Equestria they'd have a hard time finding themselves welcomed anywhere. Finally... after all these years, justice was being served. It felt so, so, good. I heard a sniffle and looked at Giggles to see tears rolling down her face. "Did your parents really do all those horrible things to you?" I'd only given them a vague idea about how I was treated, not wanting to go into details at the time. "That and more." I nodded. "They sometimes broke or threw away my things when they were mad at me. Half the time when they punished me I didn't even know if I'd done anything wrong or not. I think sometimes they just did it because they were mad about something else so they took it out on me." "That's awful. I'm glad that they're finally getting what they deserve." Autumn looked highly indignant. "Me too. I'm glad Pinkie waited to tell anyone though. I meant what I said about not wanting to go through all that stress. I knew I wouldn't be able to handle it." I sighed. "You are an amazing pony Meadowlark, even if you don't know it." Autumn said softly. "Despite the terrible way you were treated by your parents, and despite the bad examples they set for you and the bad influences they had to have been on you, somehow you overcame it. Despite all of that, you became a GOOD pony. Many ponies would have grown up and become just as cruel as they are, because that's what they saw growing up and that's how they were taught to be." "I learned what NOT to do from watching them. They made me feel so badly... I never wanted to make other ponies feel like that. I knew how they treated me was wrong. My mother was far worse than my father though. My father has a lot of health issues so he'd be the one to stay home and take care of me while my mother worked. So at least I got a break when she wasn't home." I told them. "Nopony should ever have to look forward to getting a break from their mother so they can avoid her abuse." Autumn shook her head angrily. "I hope Rainbow Dash puts that rain cloud over their house and keeps it there!" I shrugged. "My mother's special talent is with rain clouds so even if she does I doubt it'll stay there. At least when my mother is home anyway. Though I do like that idea." Giggles hugged me. "We will do everything we can to get you to Heaven. You've been through so much, yet you're such a nice pony. You deserve to get there." I hugged her back. "Thank you. I just wish that there was some way for me to get a message to Pinkie. To let her know that I'm all right and that I appreciate everything that she's done for me." Autumn looked thoughtful at that. "Well... there IS one way, but it's not fool proof." I looked at her hopefully. "What?" "You can enter her dream when she's asleep when you're here in ghost form. You'd be able to talk to her. But it'll be a dream, and she might not remember it when she wakes up. Even if she does remember, she might think it was just a dream and nothing more." Autumn explained to me looking serious. "I still want to try. I guess we'll just have to wait around until Pinkie goes to bed tonight." I said thoughtfully before looking back to the funeral. Ponies had started making speeches again. Not just about me, but about life and death in general. I liked how they'd done this. The colors were peaceful and I appreciated how they treated my situation with respect. Nothing was too flashy or over dramatic. Some ponies were crying yes, but even Rarity, who tended to wail and grab her couch for situations like this, was staying calm. I realized then that me being at my own funeral after I died was a cliché, but I was still glad I got to be here. Honestly the circumstances of my whole life and death have been so ridiculous sometimes I feel like someone is just messing around with me for their own amusement. > Chapter 6 Dream Walking > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Chapter 6 Dream Walking After the funeral ponies miled around, eating and talking quietly. They talked about memories of me and how sudden and unexpected death could be. Eventually ponies started leaving until only Pinkie and her friends were left. "I'm going to go get started on that investigation of Meadowlark's parents." Twilight told the others. "Go on ahead sugar cube. We'll clean up here." Applejack nodded. "Didn't Meadowlark have a cat?" Rainbow Dash remembered. "I didn't see it anywhere." "Oh I already took Whiskers back to my place." Fluttershy told her. "I didn't know you had a cat." Giggles told me. "I wasn't worried. I didn't see her in the wreckage and I knew that Fluttershy would take her. I know she'll take good care of her." I replied. I thought about all the pets I've had in my life then. "Do animals go to Heaven?" "Some do, and some end up in Limbo." Autumn told me. "Though usually only pest type of creatures end up there and the rest go to Heaven." "So I'll be able to see my pets that have passed on again?" I asked hopefully. "Most likely yes." Autumn nodded. I smiled at that. It would be nice to see them all again. "I wonder what Heaven is like." "I don't know, but I bet whatever it's like that it's wonderful." Giggles said wistfully. "I'll do whatever I can to make sure that both of you are allowed in." I told her seriously. I had only been with them a little while, but I already considered Giggles and Autumn friends. It was strange, usually I wasn't able to make friends so easily. Giggles gave me a big hug. "You're such a nice pony!" I hugged her back, feeling myself blush a little. "Yeah, yeah. Don't be getting all mushy on me Giggles." I wandered over to my coffin. The funeral had been closed casket and I wondered how badly my body had been damaged to make them decide it was better this way. I decided it was probably better that I didn't know. Seeing my own mutiliated body would've given me the shivers. Autumn stepped up beside me. "Are you going to miss being alive?" "To be honest... no. I mean I'll miss Pinkie and her friends and some of the nice ponies in this town, but being alive wasn't the greatest for me. I had a lot of health problems that I'm free of now. Not to menton I never have to worry about my family bothering me again." I told her. "I know that all of the good ponies here will join me sooner or later so for me death doesn't seem bad at all. Though this is much more of an adventure than I expected." "I can imagine so. I don't think they usually make too many mistakes like this." Autumn nodded. "I don't mind it so much. It meant getting to meet you and Giggles." I smiled. "That's sweet. I do hope we get to join you in Heaven after all this is over." Autumn smiled back. After everything was cleaned up and my coffin was lowered into the ground and buried, I trotted over to look at my tombstone, curious about what might be on it. Besides my name and the date of my birth and death were the words: A dear friend. She sings with the angels now. I teared up a little at that. I had sung with the Pony Tones a few times just for fun. I was my own worst critic, but others seemed to enjoy my singing. After the others left we had time to kill before nightfall so we spied on the others a bit. Twilight was investigating my parents but the work she was doing was boring to be honest, so instead we headed over to Rarity's place. Rarity was busy making a fashion line dedicated to me. She was using my mane and coat colors. I had to admit the dresses were lovely. After Rarity's we took a peek at Pinkie and she'd named a new kind of cupcake after me. I was touched and a little embarrassed at all the attention my death was getting, though I guessed part of the reason is it was rare for ponies to die young in this town. Ponies probably thought it was a tragedy for that reason alone. We also spied on the others but for them things seemed to be business as usual, except that they seemed sad and more solemn than usual. Fluttershy was giving Whiskers extra attention, which I appreciated. Whiskers had stopped eating and was laying there listlessly. She'd done the same thing for awhile when I'd had to leave her in Fluttershy's care before while I was in the hospital once. I hoped that like last time she'd start eating again in a few days. Applejack was bucking apples as usual, but I noticed a slight frown on her face as she did so, as if she was thinking deep thoughts. Knowing how Applejack felt about family ties, I figured that hearing about how awful my parents were had probably upset her a great deal. I doubted my parents would ever be able to buy apples from her or her family again. We discovered Rainbow Dash had made a huge storm over my parents house. My mother yelled at her from the window once but quickly retreated when Rainbow sent a lightning bolt in her direction. Good old Rainbow. After checking on them we just wandered through the town and I told them as much as I could remember about the ponies and places in it. It was a nice way to pass the time until it finally started to get dark and we headed back to Pinkie's. We walked through the wall which was effortless for we ghosts and went up the stairs and passed through the door into her room. Pinkie was laying on the bed, cuddling Gummy and crying a little. I hated to see her so upset. I hoped that this would work and that I'd be able to comfort her. After about about twenty minutes Pinkie's eyes finally started to droop, and ten minutes after that she was asleep. Autumn cautioned me to wait long enough for her to be deeply asleep enough to dream, and then she coached me on how to enter the dream. "It's not difficult. Just put your hoof on her head, close your eyes, and will yourself in." She advised. "Well here goes." I put my hoof on Pinkie's forehead carefully so I didn't just pass through her completely and closed my eyes. Let me in Pinkie, please let me in... When I opened my eyes again, I was in town, but things looked different. It reminded me of when Discord had taken over the town. There were cotton candy clouds raining chocolate milk, a few buildings were floating, and things like that. Pinkie was sitting under a cloud with her head up and her mouth open, drinking the chocolate milk. "Hey Pinkie." I waved, trying to get her attention. Pinkie looked at me and blinked. She got up and walked up to me. "Hey Meadowlark. What are you doing in my dream? Wow, you have wings and a shiny circle over your head!" I smiled at that. Typical Pinkie. "I just wanted to tell you that I know you'll miss me, and that you'll grieve for a little while. That's normal and natural. But please, don't grieve too long. I'm happy Pinkie. I'm not sick anymore and I'm making new friends. When you die, which won't be for a long time I hope, we'll be together again, and this time forever." Pinkie hugged me. "I'm happy if you're happy Meadowlark. I love you. You're a great friend." I hugged her back. "You're a great friend too Pinkie. I'll never forget you. I hope you remember this and feel better when you wake up." "I always remember my dreams. I'll remember this. This isn't just a dream is it? You're really here?" Pinkie pulled back to look at me anxiously. "I'm really here Pinkie. I came to check on you all and when I saw how sad you were I wanted to do something about it." I smiled. Pinkie smiled back. "Still looking out for me even after death. But you don't need to do that anymore Meadowlark. Go to where you're supposed to be. Be happy. Spend time with your new friends. Some day, I'll come be with you, and you can introduce me to all of them. We can have a big party." "The biggest party ever." I agreed.