In these log entries is the life of a pony spy working for the Changelings.
Dillon Mane was an orphaned foal in the streets of Las Pegasus until he was adopted by top Changeling spy, Agent Cloud Haze. The Changelings moulded him to be the perfect mole in Celestia's magical land of Equestria. However, Dillon would soon discover the magic of friendship. Which side would he choose to take then? The dark creatures that feed off the love of others? Or the happy and kind citizens of the bright and magical Equestria? Here are the once secret report logs of Agent Dillon Mane.
lololol spy crab. Dillon likes spy crabbing in TF2. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Author's note: This story is written in the style of a diary, hence the rather short chapters. The first chapter is has been funnified! Hopefully the jokes actually work. They were meant to provide more infomation about Dillon Mane's personality and give a few laughs in the process. I promise there will be more jokes in the later entries :) .
The city of Las Pegasus has been mentioned by Rainbow Dash in an episode of MLP: FiM and I decided to make it a ponified gangster infested Las Vegas. Therefore, I cannot claim the name "Las Pegasus" as my creation.
Lol just thought a disclaimer would make the thing 20% cooler. Oh well, enjoy the story! /)(^3^)(
The custom images were created in General Zoi's Pony Creator.
The story is rated 'Teen' because of reference to gangs, casinos, mafia and police street fights. But personally I think that its a fact we have to face. These things exist. I think that the young ones should know that the place we live in is no Heaven. But what can we do about it? We have to face it. Its a fact.
All pony ages have are shown as their equivalents in human years Dates have also been translated from the Celestian calendar ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Agent Name: Dillon Mane Place of Origin: Las Pegasus Gender: Male Race: Pegasus Pony Age: Approximately 23 Role: Infiltration of Equestrian forces
Identification Details
Mane Colour: Black/Dark Brown Coat Colour: Coffee Brown Cutie Mark: Red rose Additional Features: Frequently wears dark sunglasses
Top agent, Cloud Haze, found a pony foal inside a garbage can in the streets of Las Pegasus. Cloud Haze took the foal back to HQ. The foal was named Dillon Mane. The Changeling army saw an opportunity to fight against Celestia with a true pony. A real pony would lack all the flaws of a transformed Changeling like green eyes and green magic. However, the pony was a Pegasus, meaning it lacked magic. Still, the CASF insisted that he be trained to be the perfect mole. Many Changeling leaders objected to this as it seemed to be a waste of time and effort. The reason for the continued execution of the operation is at this time, unknown.
-Report by: Head Agent Rail Gant ------------------------------------------------------------------------- March 14 2009
The CASF sent me on my first official mission in Las Pegasus 20 years after I was found by Agent Cloud Haze. My mission was to first infiltrate and gain the trust of the crime lord known as "Mr Pony". I visited a casino owned by him at around 11:30pm. The interior was very grand, just like all the other casinos found in this neon lighted city. I played a few games and won quite a pile of bits. Cloud Haze's "Know which risk to take" training really paid off. At 11:57, the target was sighted. I approached him and presented him with some papers about investing in Changeling businesses or something like that. I was lucky he was interested. After a bit of talking, I left for the hotel at 12:26am.
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane -------------------------------------------------------------------------
May 1 2009
The CASF told me that there was no need to write the exact times of everything I did. They told me to write reports like I was writing a diary. So I thought, "Hey! In diaries we write our emotions and opinions! Imma gonna troll this report".
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane ------------------------------------------------------------------------- May 3 2009
The CASF told me to not write stuff that are too personal in the reports. Why didn't you say so earlier?
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane ------------------------------------------------------------------------- May 18 2009
The CASF has decided that there was no more need for Mr Pony. We've got all we need from him. Head Agent Rail Gant praised me for being able to so quickly aquire the required infomation.
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane ------------------------------------------------------------------------- May 20 2009
Mr Pony has dissapeared from the scene completely. We released evidence of his illegal dealings with some other mafia leaders. This is Mr Pony's full log profile.
Name: Al Kapony aka "Mr Pony" Age: 45 Race: Pegasus Pony Location: Unknown Occupation: Crime boss, Casino Owner Mane Colour: White Coat Colour: Dark Gray
The streets of Las Pegasus are in chaos as there is now a war between the local police and the gangs. Pies are flying everywhere. Those crime bosses are getting desperate. Mission accomplished. Time to leave this crumbling city.
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane ------------------------------------------------------------------------- May 21 2009
If only you could read this, Al Kapony. YOU HAD IT COMING TO YOU GANGSTA!!!
-Unnaccessary Comment by: Agent Dillon Mane -------------------------------------------------------------------------
Changeling Army Secret Forces Log "Stranger in Ponyville"
Sentences written in between ** are added by the Royal Canterlot Library Sentences written in brackets are the personal opinions of Dillon Mane ------------------------------------------------------------------------- October 5 2010
We have recieved word that Princess Celestia has sent her personal student, Twilight Sparkle, to a small town called Ponyville. I have been tasked to find out more infomation about Celestia through Ms Twilight. I will arrive in Ponyville on October 10 2010, the same day as Twilight Sparkle.
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane ------------------------------------------------------------------------- October 10 2010
*Part of this entry could not be recovered. Only the last few sentences remain in the file. Some words have been damaged.*
t se ms that Ms T lig t Sp rkle is also new here. I won't be talking to or befriending her. I'll just observe from afar. I don't want to get too close to a personal student of Celestia. What does Celestia even teach her? How to be a power hungry tyrant who would not hesitate to banish her own sister to the moon?
Name: Twilight Sparkle Age: Unknown Race: Unicorn Pony Mane Colour: Black with a stripe of purple Coat Colour: Purple (Weird if you ask me) -Report by: Agent Dillon Mane ------------------------------------------------------------------------- October 11 2010
Today was very strange. I was At the Summer Sun Celebration hoping to actually see Princess Celestia herself. Instead, her sister appeared in a rather strange costume and calling herself "Nightmare Moon".
Name: Nightmare Moon Age: 1000+ Race: Alicorn Pony Mane Colour: Shiny deep blue Coat Colour: Black Guards started chasing her so I decided to leave the party and track down Twilight Sparkle.
I overheard Twilight's conversation with her friends about something called "The Elements of Harmony". They may pose a threat to the Changeling Empire. It appears that there are 6 Elements of Harmony. Twilight and her friends left the library to retrieve the Elements in the Everfree Forest.
-Report by: Dillon Mane ------------------------------------------------------------------------- October 12 2010
That was the date on my hoofphone at the time. However, the night sky looked pretty strange. It looked like as if it was going to be night forever. I followed the 6 mares into the Everfree Forest. They had to overcome a few challenges. It felt as if somepony had set up obstacles deliberately. There were scary trees, cheap Wonderbolts wannabes and a serpent obsessed with his moustache. I knew this was a strange day.
Eventually the Mane Six (cool name right?) found Nightmare Moon and the Elements of Harmony. The power those Elements held... it was amazing. Each of the Elements contained the power of a moral value that each of the Mane Six possesed. They are Loyalty, Honesty, Laughter, Kindness, Generousity and... Magic? I am unable to understand the "Magic" Element at this moment. However, I will submit a full report on these Elements Of Harmony to Queen Chrysalis herself when I figure out what "Magic" is supposed to mean.
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane -------------------------------------------------------------------------
--End of Log 4-- Logs 2 and 3 have been omitted due to irrelevance to Equestrian History Logs 1 and 4 can be found in the Royal Canterlot Library Mobile phones were illegal in Equestria
Changeling Army Secret Forces Log "To build a Pony"
------------------------------------------------------------------------- October 13 2010
There are many preparations I have to make. The CASF has given me a ticket to the Grand Galloping Gala. Due to the Nightmare Moon incident, I haven't set up a cover up profile for myself yet.
As for the events of today, Twilight Sparkle has recieved two Gala tickets. Her friends were pestering her for the extra ticket. Fortunately, they all got a ticket in the end. Why couldn't Celestia just send 7 tickets in the first place? Here are the profiles of the 7 owners of the tickets.
Name: Twilight Sparkle Age: 18-22 (Updated) Element: Magic Other details found in previous log
Name: Rainbow Dash Age: 18-22 Mane Colour: Rainbow (So intense!) Coat colour: Cyan Race: Pegasus Pony (as if anypony here isn't a pony) Element: Loyalty
Name: Pinkamena Diane Pie Age: 18-22 Mane Colour: Pink Coat Colour: Pink AGAIN?! Race: Earth Pony Element: Laughter (I bet she goes "lololololol" everytime she plays Halo)
Name: Spike Age: Unknown Gender: Male Race: Baby Dragon Primary Colour: Purple Secondary Colour: Green ( I think I've seen his dad somewhere before.) Occupation: Twilight Sparkle's assistant
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane -------------------------------------------------------------------------
October 14 2010
Miss Applejack has been helping ponies all over town while going through Applebuck Season all by herself because her brother is injured. There would not be much to report on the Mane 6 today. Everypony is just going about their daily activities.
I have decided to set a small private detective agency to earn some side money. This is my fake profile.
Name: Dillon Mane Age: 21 Occupation: Private Detective Hobbies: Playing TF2
My appearance would be more or less the same. I'll be wearing a brown jacket and black shades. Head Agent Rail Gant has given me a disguise kit just in case. The real mission would begin soon.
Disguise kit would come in handy for detective work. I feel like a spy in TF2. "May I borrow your earpiece? This is Scout! Rainbows make me cry!" Scout would not like Rainbow Dash.
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane -------------------------------------------------------------------------
--End of Log 5--
Halo and Team Fortress 2 are banned in Equestria
Fortunately, Dillon was not discovered playing these or he may have ended up on the moon
Log 5 has been kept safely in the Royal Canterlot Library
The missing piece of Log 4 has been found along with Dillon's letter to Queen Chrysalis
Changeling Army Secret Forces Log "The Lost Entry"
------------------------------------------------------------------------- 10 October 2010
I have arrived in Ponyville. It was a long flight from Las Pegasus. My wings are very tired. I saw royal guards escorting Twilight Sparkle on a chariot. I wish I had a chariot. Today I stationed a radio and transmitter in the Everfree Forest. Queen Chrysalis gave me direct orders to do so. The reason is unknown to me at the moment. It seems to be quite important. This is why I decided to take note of it in this entry.
It seems that Ms Twilight Sparkle is also new here. I won't be talking to or befriending her. I'll just observe from afar. I don't want to get too close to a personal student of Celestia. What does Celestia even teach her? How to be a power hungry tyrant who would not hesitate to banish her own sister to the moon?
Name: Twilight Sparkle Age: Unknown Race: Unicorn Pony Mane Colour: Black with a stripe of purple Coat Colour: Purple (Weird if you ask me)
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane -------------------------------------------------------------------------
Letter to Queen Chrysalis
Your Majesty,
I have done some research on the Elements of Harmony. These Elements have proven to be threatening to all Changeling kind. The power of harmony and friendship is extraordinary. These Elements may be able to destroy the darkness of a Changeling's heart. Here is a detailed report of each Element of Harmony.
(Description of the first five Elements of Harmony has been omitted due to the fact that everypony already knows what they were after the defeat of Nightmare Moon.)
The most powerful of the six Elements seems to be Magic. I still do not understand this Element fully but I think the answer will reveal itself in the future. Perhaps some crazy Draconequus will show up and turn everything upside down, revealing what the Element of Magic truly means.
Your Faithful Agent, Dillon Mane
------------------------------------------------------------------------- --End of Document--
These two documents were recovered from the bedroom Queen Chrysalis slept in as Princess Cadance
The documents are kept along with the CASF Logs in the Royal Canterlot Library
Changeling Army Secret Forces "Room for Rent" -----------------------------------------------------------------------
October 16 2010
I spent the whole of yesterday making my new detective office-home nice and neat. It's situated just next to the library. There's a nice soft bed here too. The landlady, Mrs Smith, was very sweet to offer me a jar of zap apple jam. She is the sister of Granny Smith.
Two young mares live in the room next door. Their names are Vinyl Scratch and Octavia. Vinyl is a DJ at the local club. Her stage name is DJ Pon-3. Octavia is a cello player whose ensemble will be playing at the Gala.
The location of my room allows me to easily track Twilight Sparkle's movements. As for my detective agency, I've put some adverts in the local paper.
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane -----------------------------------------------------------------------
October 17 2010
There is thick black smoke coming from the mountain just outside town. The Mane 6 has set off to confront what they suspect is a dragon. I'm not going to follow this time. I've decided to take the next few days off. I need some rest. There's still groceries I need to buy too.
After the past few days of observation, I noticed that Ms Twilight frequently writes letters to Celestia. The subject of these letters are currently unknown to me. But I'm sure to find out just what Celestia is up to. The fate of the Changeling race depends on me!
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane -----------------------------------------------------------------------
Changeling Army Secret Forces "Gamer Luna" -----------------------------------------------------------------------
October 18 2010
Today I had my first client! BEST DAY EVER! All I have to do is follow somepony I don't even know, take some pictures and make my client go "Shut up and take my money!". Oh, and I will gladly take that money. Muahahaha!!!
-Irrelevant Entry by: Agent Dillon Mane -----------------------------------------------------------------------
October 19 2010
Team Fortress 2 day is today! I pwned ponies across the servers. I am really glad Celestia actually decided to lift the ban on first person shooters in Equestria. The servers used to be pretty empty. Maybe she isn't a bad pony after all. Well, but what I was told by the CASF made it seem like Celestia ruled over Equestria with an iron fist. Her words were breathed to be obeyed. Either you love and tolerate or BAM! On the MOOOONNNAA!! I'm having some doubts about the CASF now. What is the true Celestia like?
Back to Team Fortress 2. I made a new friend online today. Her username was "Gamer_Luna". She says she is the co-ruler of Equestria and loves first person shooters. I didn't believe that she was Princess Luna at first but then I thought "Could it be? Could Princess Luna be the one to lift that cursed ban?". Wow. I just met a Princess.
-Irrelevant Entry by: Agent Dillon Mane -----------------------------------------------------------------------
October 19 2010 (Yes, its the same day.)
So, Princess Luna made FPS games legal. The two Princesses are of equal rank. This means that both of them would have to agree on it before passing the proposal. And this would mean that Celestia agreed. However there is a high chance that she did so only for her sister. More investigation is required about Princess Celestia's true personality.
Well, I guess that I won't be having to play in Offline Practice mode in TF2 anymore. Ponies are flooding the servers. BEST DAY EVER!
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane ----------------------------------------------------------------------- --End of Unsubmitted Log--
Changeling Army Secret Forces "Don't Feed The Parasprites" -----------------------------------------------------------------------
October 20 2010
Princess Celestia was scheduled to make a royal visit to Ponyville today. The CASF has recently sent over an experimental new tranquilizer serum and I have been tasked to test it. Why can't they do it themselves in a lab or something?
I was busy in the park... um... looking for something. Nnnnope! Totally not hitting on mares. And then I saw it. The cutest little creature I ever saw. And it's not a mare. It was (according to that encyclopedia on Equestrian animals) a Parasprite. The encyclopedia said to refrain from keeping them as pets. But it was sooooo cute! I took it home anyway. And besides, it looked like the Princess was going to be late.
When I go back to my... ahem, office, I suddenly got two parasprites in my pocket. And then I was like "What?" and I was like "Huh?" and then... I was like "Woah! Woah woah woah! Stop eating my Mac&Cheese! OMG the tomatoes! Arrrgh!!!". And what happens next? I bring out the big guns. Ok, it was only one gun. A tranquilizer gun. Hehe. And I shot both parasprites like a pro sniper. Like a boss! I locked both parasprites inside a little cage I quickly bought while they were asleep. One was blue and the other yellow. I named the blue one "Leslie" and the yellow one as "Kirk". I'm a pro at giving names. I then closed my windows. That's one hell of an infestation out there. Parasprites, parasprites everywhere. But I couldn't sit back and watch parasprites destroy everything. I grabbed my tranquilizer gun and started shooting down as many as I could. Eventually the parasprites left, following polka music played by... Pinkie Pie. I was like "WTH?!" and then I was like "Now what do I do with all these sleeping parasprites?". The only solution I had was: Well, time to buy more cages. Scumbag brain.
Oh, and Celestia couldn't hold her visit because of an infestation of some sort in Fillydelphia. I bet I know just what kind of infestation it is. Poor Fillydelphians.
OMG I hope those parasprites don't start breeding. And, umm... I used up all the tranquilizing serum. Kthxbai!
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane ----------------------------------------------------------------------- --End of Log 7--
Events described in Log 8 are likely to have taken place in an alternate timeline (Adventure time!)
Changeling Army Secret Forces logs "Winter's Messed Up" -----------------------------------------------------------------------
October 20 2010 (Just before midnight, according to watch)
Okay, I seriously didn't notice it was winter. Did I travel in time or something? Just yesterday it was summer. Then again, I did feel a little dizzy this morning. And why am I lying on a bench in the park? And why have I suddenly gotten this craving for chocolate milk? Mother of Celestia, this is just like that "Ponies In Black 3" movie!
In this alternate timeline (I watch too many movies don't I?), the first pony I met was a light brown stallion with spiked down hair and a green tie. "Just call me The Doctor." he said with a British accent. I was told that he had brought me to this other reality in his "TARDIS" which to me, looked just like a phone booth to me. "Um... no offense but Doc Brown had a much cooler and more reliable time machine than yours don't you think?" I asked. And then The Doctor was all like "My time machine is way cooler than somepony's frozen Delorean!" and "I definitely use less than 1.21 gigawatts. See? I'm saving electricity!". "Kay, chill dude. Why have you brought me here?" and then I knocked him out. Well, I had to stop him! Who knew he would so readily jump to the defense of his time machine? Sweet Celestia.
Name: Doctor Whooves (cool nickname?) Mane Colour: Dark Brown Coat Colour: Light Brown Gender: Male Kind: Earth Pony (or was he a Pegasus?)
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane ----------------------------------------------------------------------- October 21 2010 (dawn)
"These creatures, called 'Daleks', are coming to invade Equestria today during Winter Wrap Up!" was what Doctor Whooves told me. Daleks are alien mutants inside robotic shells that believe that all other beings are inferior to them. That's specist! So, I'm told that only I have the necessary skill to eliminate the Dalek threat. And how? Oh sweet Celestia, the Doc wants me to pose as a Dalek and take them out from within their ranks. I thought that it would be an easy job. Except the fact that I have have to destroy them with no knowledge of how to operate a Dalek shell and that I have to do it in five hours!!! This is going to give me a headache.
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane ----------------------------------------------------------------------- --End of Log 8-- This log was not submitted to CASF
If a Pegasus wearing the Flux Capacitor were to fly at 88 mph, BACK TO THE FUTURE she goes!
Changeling Army Secret Forces logs "INFILTRATE!" -----------------------------------------------------------------------
October 21 2010 (morning)
Ouch. I just saw a Dalek evaporate a tree. I hope that wasn't Fluttershy.
The Dalek seemed to be easy to impersonate. All I have to do is shout "EXTERMINATE!" and I'll join the herd.
I flushed the Dalek out of its shell with a really super high voltage stun gun from the future. That Dalek armour sure is tough stuff. But it seems the stun gun the Doctor gave me was even tougher! Dalek amour is strong, but it could withstand good ol' future pony engineering!
And so, I tranquilized the exposed Dalek. Yeah, I found one more dart in my pocket. The Dalek looked just like a cross between chewing gum and a squid. Eww. It may have looked harmless, but that thing just obliterated a tree from existance! You can never be too safe. Alright, all that's left is to get into this freaking ugly piece of scrap metal. Oooh! I see the rest of the Daleks! I'll continue writing later.
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane -----------------------------------------------------------------------
October 21 2010 (around noon)
The ponies have already started Winter Wrap Up. The Daleks are mobilising. Fortunately, the ponies have shove snow from the rooftops on the ground. And I lolled at the Daleks' reaction to this. "Well, this certainly buggers our plan to conquer Equestria." they said. The this guy starts saying "Real Daleks don't climb stairs. They level the building. Real Daleks don't move on snow. They fly over it. Seriously guys. What's wrong with you?"
ELEVATE! It seems the Dalek shell responds to voice commands. Just say "ELEVATE" and you hover. Say "EXTERMINATE!" and BOOM! Freaking lasers.
Most ponies are in the town outskirts doing... wrapping up winter. Back in Changeling country, winter wraps up on its own. But here, everypony is like "One does not simply let the sun do it." I mean, seriously, what the hay? There's a reason why the sun is a big fireball in space. Or maybe in this timeline, Celestia is really lazy. That must be it. Too lazy to wrap up winter with solar power. Where am I? I want to go home!
The Daleks are moving fast. Faster than expected, considering the ridiculous metal shells. How am I supposed to stop so many Daleks? There's like, 7 of them! I can't "EXTERMINATE" or stun gun them without being exterminated. Need a plan. Why am I still writing this?
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane ----------------------------------------------------------------------- --End of Log 9--
Author's Note: I have no idea what I'm writing. I've never watched Doctor Who. To all Whovians reading this. Please don't eat me. :(
Changeling Army Secret Forces logs "Focus and Distract!" -----------------------------------------------------------------------
October 21 2010 (a little later since the last entry)
Even though it's only been five minutes since that last entry, the ponies in already in the Dalek group's sight. And even though it's only been five minutes since that last entry, I've already got an I-DEE-AH! (Am I starting to talk like those ponies?)
I've been thinking about it the wrong way. There isn't enough time to take them all at once. Then I'll make time. Ok, time to focus and distract. How do I distract? No time to explain that now. I'll write about it when there's time. ;)
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane -----------------------------------------------------------------------
October 21 2010
Uhh. That was close. Guess what I just did? I EXTERMINATED one of the Daleks and jumped out of my shell before the others could react. Cloud Haze's "Energizing Breakfast for Ponies" recipe sure works wonders. Shoot, they've spotted me! Gotta run!
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane -----------------------------------------------------------------------
October 21 2010 (still)
Thank Celestia (I'm not really thanking Celestia. I'm working for a Changeling. I just say it because everypony else does.) I had Cloud Haze's "Energizing Breakfast for Ponies" in the morning.
I am now flying at high speed above the rooftops of the southern side of Ponyville. While dodging lasers and being chased by Daleks. They aren't very fast but their lasers are a different story. cjfosc!)$fnzsaxzw*djiz !@sd sorry! That was a close shave. I'm still flying. In a very big circle. A very very big circle. I'm now turning around and seeing that the Daleks are still chasing me like the n00bs they are. Lololol. Too bad I can't shoot back at them or anything. I'll just distract them from interrupting Winter Wrap Up. They'll be so-- oh Celestia! They've stop chasing me. Dammit! They are moving towards the park! Well, I still have this stun gun. The Doctor said it was from the future. HEY! Where is Doctor Whooves anyway? I'll find him later. Time to pwn Daleks and show them CASF skills!
-Report by: Agent Dillon Mane ----------------------------------------------------------------------- --End of Log 10--
The Author Speaks: Well, this chapter took some time. And it's not the best chapter one could read. Sigh. Where is this story going?! *looks down* I'm a n00b. I hope to end this whole Dr. Whooves thing by the next chapter. I thought that having Winter Wrap Up one day after the parasprite chapter would be weird. It's like winter overnight. In this Dillon Mane story, the episodes of MLP: FiM take place one day after another. It seemed legit... until Winter Wrap Up. Sigh.
