An Assortment of Short Poems

by Fernin

First published

A series of short, moderately humorous pony poems

Herein is recorded the pony-themed portion the ongoing war between the writer, Fernin, and his vile nemesis, the People's Army of the Democratic Republic of Writer's Block.

I sometimes write short poems to try to motivate myself to write actual stories. I find the structure of poems help order my mind. And as long as I'm writing, and it's pony-themed, why not put it here? What do you call those anyway? Pony Poems? Pony-ems? Eh.

If you're looking for a complicated story (or indeed any actual plot at all) this isn't what you seek... but hopefully it's enjoyable enough.

(cover image borrowed from a comic by the artist Kerijiano )

Poems 01-02: Thoughts by the Author on the Best Pony & Rarity's Haikus

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Poem 01: Thoughts by the Author on the Best Pony

Some Bronies like Gilda, and yes, I do too,
While some like Zecora's weird rhyming and brews;
Not a few Pony fans like the rock that's called Tom
And we all love ol' Dash with her "Sonic Rainbomb."

But I think there's a favorite that gets overlooked
Who's the coolest of cool-- well, at least in my book.
Yes he's awkward, and silly, and has room to grow.
Still, the dragon called Spike steals the whole buckin' show.

Now, Spike may not rise with the fleeing of night,
But he slaves through the day for his dear pal Twilight
He cleans and he straightens; he's Twi's Number One--
When she says 'Make It So,' Spike will get that stuff done.

Sure, Spike sometimes whines at long lists of "To Do's,"
But he's faithful and loyal and pushes on through.
The purple-green dragon tries hard for his friends,
Though he's-- what, eight or ten?-- he comes through in the end.

It's not clear if Spike is indentured or what,
But one thing's for sure-- he kicks serious butt!
As Twilight's Assistant he's her One and Only,
So I think you'll agree with me: SPIKE IS BEST PONY.

02: Haikus by Rarity, on her sister

Okay, yes, obviously I'm doing haiku wrong stringing them together like this. Just assume she's doing them from time to time through the episode

Vexing little one,
Misdirected energy
Ruins my breakfast.

Little Sweetie Belle,
With curly mane aflutter--
Horrid mess-maker!

Even when helping,
Destroys designer sweaters.
What crosses I bear.

Sapphire-stealing thief
With crayons, craft paper, and paste...
What a disaster!

Alone, finally!
Peaceful quiet in the shop.
But have I been wrong?

Love for my sister
Hidden by put-on manners
I can't help but feel

Soft, flaky pastry,
Sweet apples and cinnamon.
Together, a pie.