> Aim For The Moon
>  by CalmAndInsane
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Where Outside Of Equestria Are We?
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

        “Two minutes to full charge of drive.”

        “Collectors are powered down. Power levels are steady. Batteries one through sixteen are green.”

        “Navigation matrix active. Calculating…”

        “One minute, thirty seconds to full charge.”

        “Landing selected. Navigation ready to go.”

        “Engaging levitation field.”

        “Levitation field active. One length and holding.”

        “One minute to full charge.”

        “Batteries at sixty percent.”

        “Engineering, double check your readings. Did you read a nine as six?”

        “Negative, batteries at fifty eight percent.”

        “We are draining power too fast. Abort.”

        “Aborting charge… Nutbunnies! The Sparkle Drive isn't responding!”

        “Re-engage collectors!”

        “This close to launch?”

        “We’re at one minute and can’t abort!”

        “Re-engaging collectors.”

        “Batteries at fifteen percent!”

        “How are we losing power this fast?!”

        “What was that!” “Crabapples!” “Mother!”

        “Levitation buffer four just blew!”

        “We’re going to stabilize us manually!”

        “With how heavy we are? Not even you can do that!”

        “We have to try or we’ll wind up lost in space!”

        “Batteries at five percent!”

        “Oh please, let Us make this.”

        “Charge complete! Launching!”





        I was awestruck that it had worked. I had expected to us to fry up in a star, but some miraculous event placed us in a large clearing. There wasn't much light besides what was given off by the controls, though without power they should not have been emitting light at all. Oh, wait, there was a moon in the sky, that would explain it. I picked myself up off the floor. Apparently I had fallen down while trying to keep our aim steady. 

        “Is everypony okay?” I called, looking to the rest of the crew. Three sounds that were half groan, half affirmatives greeted me. “Good. Status report?”

        The pony to my left was first to respond, “We've suffered a 100% increase in nausea…” Oh Double Take, always the humorous one. Double Take was the crew’s engineer. Surprisingly he was a pegasus, not as one would assume, a unicorn or an earth pony. I looked over at the yellowish orange pegasus. His wings were flared out, his head bent over, and his cheeks looking slightly greener than usual. 

        “Other than that, looks like we blew the collectors, and the batteries are shot,” Double Take managed to wheeze out, “I imagine most of the circuits are fired too.”

        “Well so long as there is edible plant life here, we should be able to sustain ourselves until it can be fixed,” I noted, looking around our crash site. In truth it was more of a landing than a true crash. We had landed on a shallow but large hill. Had it not been for the fact that our systems broke, I would say we had made a successful first jump. Though there seemed to be little plant life, and the soil was laid out in an odd pattern of alternating peaks and troughs laid out in straight lines. The plants even seemed to be evenly spaced apart. This was all much too neat. If I had not known better I would have guessed we were on a farm back in Equestria. 

        “What's our status? Let me just flip on the console and… Oh that’s right, without power the navigation systems don’t function. How about that?” The unicorn to my left quipped. Quick Wit was a rather obnoxious mare. As her name implied, her mind outpaced nearly all others. She became upset, however, whenever anypony could not keep up with her. This lead to some rather rude comments. I glared at the light green mare and she looked away.

        “The cargo is secure. All none of it,” muttered an off white earth pony stallion. Under his breath, I then heard him mention that he needed a drink. I was unsurprised that Hard Stuff was almost unphased by what had happened. Already he was the first up and about, checking our new surroundings. Hard Stuff was out quartermaster for the trip. The plan had been to make a quick test jump to the moon, grab a few things, and hop back to Equestria in about two hours. It now looked like out trip would be much longer.

“I think this planet is inhabited,” Hard Stuff noted, “Do you all see the light peeking over the tree line?”

        “Yes, I do. It’s called a sunrise,” Quick Wit exasperatedly explained.

        “If there is a sunrise, there must be somepony controlling it,” I pondered, “Hard Stuff, I going to assume your assessment is correct. This planet is inhabited. Now it is only a matter of if they are willing to aid us.”

        “Hey, as long as they don’t ‘aid’ us the way of the lemon, I’m good,” Double Take joked, chucking at his own dark humor. 

        “Let’s wait for more light before we asses the damage,” I recommend. I chorus of yes mam’s followed.





        A police car pulled into the driveway of the farm house. After a second the headlights went out and the engine was cut. An officer with a questionable mustache stepped out and walked up to the man sitting on the house’s front porch.

        “Alright Dale, where are these kids that were making crop circles,” sighed the officer.

        “Good ta see ya again, James. Though, uh... It's a bit more complicated that I said on the phone,” Dale explained, leading the way out to his field. The two crept quietly along until Dale stopped and pointed.

        “That doesn't look like kids making a crop circle, Dale,” James stated, “That looks like Stonehenge and The Washington Monument pooped a baby out into your field.”

        “Well if’n Ah had told ya that would ya ‘ave come?” Dale asked.

        “Okay, that’s a fair point,” James admitted, “But what do you want me to do about it?”

        “Call it in! Don’t y’all have codes for aliens and things?” Dale gestured to the structure that clearly had four quadrupedal forms moving around it.

        “Oh we have codes for aliens alright, but those codes actually mean false alarm. There is no code for this,” James shrugged.

        “Well then make one up,” Dale ordered.

        James picked up his radio, “Dispatch, this is officer Mandal, the situation at Dale’s is a little more complicated than he made it out to be. I’m requesting another car be sent out to help me handle it.”





        After what I guessed to be a half an hour of waiting the sun still had not crested the trees. It had in fact, not gotten any brighter.

        “So much for a sunrise,” Double Take sighed.

        “Wait, why can’t you just lift the sun, Princess?” Quick Wit asked.

        “If this planet is indeed inhabited by another race, I do not want to make a poor impression by taking control of the sun from them,” I stated, “After an amount of time I deem suitable has passed, if the sun still has not risen. I will raise it.”

        “I think that really you can’t,” Quick Wit challenged, “I mean you are princess of the night after all. The sun is much bigger than that hunk of rock you push around.”

        Fooling a pony that has been alive for several times your lifespan is not easy. No matter how smart Quick With thought her bait was, I was not going to rise to take it.

        “That 'hunk of rock’ is much bigger than you seem to think it is,” I said, unamused, “Perhaps on our way home I shall make a quick stop to drop you off so that you can become better acquainted with that fact.”

        “Can we save the arguing until after we get home?” Hard Stuff asked, “I kind of don’t want to listen to bickering for however long it take for us to make the repairs.”

        “Wise words,” I nodded, “Still, I will not be moving the sun until I feel it safe to do so.” And with those words I sat down and waited for the sun to crest the horizon.





        The driveway of the farmhouse was packed with cars, when yet another van drove up and had to park on the lawn. Counting the most recent addition, there were now seven cars in front of the house. The house’s owner’s pickup truck was blocked in the driveway by two police cars, and an ambulance. Pulled off to the side of the twisting gravel drive sat a firetruck, and a state trooper’s car. The new car pulled off behind the state trooper’s car and cut the engine. Two men in black suits stepped out of the van and made their way to the scene, another two pulled equipment out of the back of the vehicle. 

        A group of uniformed people milled around beneath a hill while the rest peeked over the hill at the alien craft. One of the black suited men shook his head at the disorganization and attempted to figure out who was in charge. By the time the rest of his team had brought their gear over he had decided there was no one in charge. 

        “If I could have everyone’s attention,” the man projected. And just like that he was in charge. With all eyes now on him, he continued, “We appreciate everyone’s concern with the situation, but your presence is no longer required. If everyone could return to their respective stations for debriefing it would be most appreciated.”

        “Who are you guys? The Men In Black?” a fireman joked.

        “No. We are the successors to Project Blue Book,” the man answered, his gaze passing the assembled crowd. 

        Almost ten seconds passed before a paramedic spoke up, “Well then. I think I’ll leave the situation in your capable hands. Not much we can do here anyway,” With a wave of her hand, the EMTs all began making their way back to the ambulance. That broke the spell that had kept everyone frozen in place, slowly the crowd dispersed, leaving just the four agents.

        “Set up a monitoring station at the top of the hill,” the lead agent ordered the two laden down with equipment, “We’ll see what intel we can gather and re-assess the situation when the sun rises.”





        There was a poke in my side. 

        “Princess, wake up,” Hard Stuff hissed.

        “Hmm?” I opened my eyes only to have to close them again. At some point I had fallen asleep, and apparently the sun had risen. 

        “The sun’s up Princess,” Hard Stuff poked me again. 

        “We can see that. Tis why We are sleeping,” I grumbled, then the events of last night hit me. I sprung up and held a hoof over my eyes to allow myself to adequately view the situation. Double Take and Quick Wit were both still asleep. I glanced above the treeline to where the light had been coming from during the night. Only the sun was not there. Instead it was just above hill on the opposite side of us. “The day, tis almost over? Why were We not awoken sooner?” 

        “Errr. About that,” Hard Stuff hoofed the ground, “I kind of just woke up myself.”

        “Double Take! Quick Wit! Awaken, we have nearly slept the day away. We must work quickly while we still have light!” I ordered.

        The two stirred, both looked like they had just reached the dream state. I scrambled to my hooves, moving to asses the battery that took up most of the central pillar. 

        “No need to rush. The sun’s rising, not setting.” 

        I quickly twirled around to face the new voice. What stood before me, meandering its way down the hill, was a creature the likes of which I had never seen before. It walked on two legs, protrusions on the front of its hooves helping to steady it. Most of it was black, save a while spot beneath what I assumed was its neck and its head. It had a flat face, its mouth set at the same depth as its eyes. Said eyes were small, the two together took up less space than its mouth. The top of its head was covered in a closely trimmed brown mane that seemed to sprout from all over rather than just in one vertical stripe. Affixed to the side of its head were two rounded ears, and by affixed, I do mean affixed, there was absolutely no way that they would be capable of any sort of movement.

        It was impossible to tell the creature’s height because it was still moving down an incline, but I hypothesized that it was roughly three lengths tall. Twice the height of the average pony. I remained silent, analyzing it as it continued its descent. I could see no external focus that would allow the creature to perform magic. Though there was always the possibility that, like dragons, it could breath fire. It worried me that this being had no visible means to defend itself, yet it seemed not to regard us as posing any danger. Whatever this thing was, it obviously was keeping its abilities under wraps.

        “I apologize if I startled you, but I didn’t want to wake you all up. Figured you’d be tired from your trip,” It stopped about twenty four lengths away from us, looking us over, gauging our reactions. And that’s when it grew a second pair of limbs. No not grew, they had already been there, the shadows had hid them. They folded out from behind its back before it clasped them together. The limbs ended not in hooves, but in hands, that much to my relief, lacked claws. Like its head, the creature’s hands were the same color as a shaven pony, an odd tannish pink. “Allow me to welcome you to Earth.”

        “We appreciate the greeting Earth creature,” I bowed my head, hoping the others were following my example, “Forgive Us for not parting in your greeting gesture, but we lack the necessary anatomy to perform such an act.”

        It looked down to its hands and smiled, “Oh, this isn't a greeting gesture. When we talk we simply move out hands about unless we have something better for them to do.” True to its words, the being’s hands seemed to flitter around as it spoke. I felt like I was missing half of the conversation not being able to derive the nuances of its movements. “If you don’t mind me asking, why make all the effort to traverse the vast emptiness of space to reach our little ball of dirt?”

        “In truth it was an error,” I answered, “We were aiming at our moon. Fate decided that We would be brought to your planet instead.”

        It nodded at this, “Well, if your presence here is an accident, how can we help you get where you want to be?”

        “We are currently assessing the damage and will leave as soon as everything is operational. Your offer is appreciated, but We would hate to inconvenience you,” I stated. One does not live thousands of years and engage in politics with multiple other species without learning to pick up the meaning behind the words. The meaning behind this creature’s words were obvious, ‘We will help you, but we won’t trust you.’ 

        “It wouldn't be an inconvenience at all. I am sure you all are eager to return home after all,” it gave a friendly smile. The same sort of friendly smile you give to a pony that had just apologized for waking you up from a wonderful nap.

        “If We do require anything, We shall inform you post haste,” I told the creature with a slight bow. It bowed its head in return. We remained staring at each other until it moved to sit down. 

        “Princess, could you come look at this please?” Double Take asked. Hesitantly, I removed my eyes from the creature and walked to the central pillar. Double Take made no move to show me what he was looking at, but the frown on his face told me it wasn't good. In place of the dark silver pillar that was our battery, we now had a hazy crystalline structure.

        “What happened?” I asked.

        “It oxidized. After we drew all available power from it, the battery tried to take the ambient magic from the air. It would have super-heated before pulling in everything it could to try to filter out the magic,” Double Take responded, “So it’s not just surface deep, it’s all the way through. With the refinery back in Baltimare it would take almost two years to remake. But here...”

        It looked like we might have to take the alien up on its offer. I glanced back at it. I hoped it was too far away to pick up on our conversation. Its small ears gave me reason to believe that it could not, but it still worried me. Then again, what were the chances that this species was advanced enough to even produce the equipment necessary for the refinement process. In fact, so far I had only seen this one, there might not even be others. This brought a frightening thought to my mind, what if this creature was the only one of its kind and was imprisoned here much like I had been on the moon. But what choice did we have? We would be stuck here for who knows how long unless it did have the capability to refine the needed material.

        With a sigh I walked to the edge of the platform and said, “We were never properly introduced.”

        “Jonathan Smith,” the creature informed me, “It’s a pleasure to meet you…?” Jonathan Smith. The name was not mentioned in any legends, that was a good sign.

        “Luna,” I stated, “Well Jonathan Smith, it seems there is something We could use help with. Do you have the capability to melt quartz?”

        “We do,” It nodded, “Though I must ask, Princess Luna, I hear correctly that you are a Princess?...  Princess Luna, what use do you have for melted quartz?”

        I paused to keep my surprise from showing. This creature had overheard one of the others calling me ‘Princess’, that meant that its hearing was much more acute than I had predicted. It also meant that it had heard everything else we had said. I determined that, most likely, it was somehow enhancing its hearing with magic.

        “It is not the quartz We are interested in, but rather one of the components of said quartz,” I answered. I saw nothing to indicate that Jonathan Smith had reacted to me staying calm after finding out that it had heard us.

        “Very well,” Jonathan Smith stood up, “We can help you refine quartz, but it will take some time. Would you mind moving to a safer location?”

        And there was the catch. It was worded eloquently, but it was there nonetheless. This Jonathan Smith had heard that our battery was fried, and knowing that we would be incapable of moving ourselves, we would be forced to hand ourselves over to it.

        “We are more than capable of looking after ourselves,” I informed Jonathan Smith, “your concern is appreciated though Jonathan Smith.”

        Jonathan Smith turned and began pacing, keeping his distance from the platform constant. 

        “Tell me Princess Luna, if advanced alien lifeforms landed on your planet, would you allow your populace free access to them? To allow them to interact with potentially dangerous creatures that you know nothing about?” Jonathan Smith asked, turning to look at me, “I thought so.” I noticed that my lips had formed a sliver of a frown. How was it that this being could read me so well? Our facial structures were vastly different. What powers was this Jonathan Smith keeping hidden?

        “We appear to be in the middle of nowhere. We have little concern that crowds of your kind will flock to marvel at Us strange beings. Besides you seem very confident. We assume you have some form of defense that gives you such confidence,” I noted. 

        “Princess Luna, with all due respect,” Jonathan Smith drew himself up, attempting to become more imposing, “You will be moved. And I think we all would prefer if the transition was peaceful.”





        Jonathan waited for a response from the alien standing about four meters in front of him. It was quadrupedal, built much like a small horse. The horn on its head and the wings on its back were the two big things that told him that it was not, in fact, just a painted horse with a speaker hidden nearby. The thing’s translucent, navy blue ‘mane’ bothered Jonathan. It acted as independent of the wind, constantly flowing in an undetectable current. The rest of the creature was midnight blue save for a black crown and chest piece, the later of which had a white, partially eclipsed circle adorning it. The creature came up to Jonathan’s chest. Though the others with it only rose to his hips.

“Oh, come on. she’s obviously female.”

 Jonathan’s right ear rang with the voices of his team. 

        “So it was called 'princess", that in no way means that it has to be female.”

        Two of them had been bickering over this and several other pointless things since they had set up the monitoring station.

        “Princess is a female title, so it has to be a girl.”

        Jonathan wished he could yell at the two of them to shut up, but they were behind the hill and he didn’t want the aliens to know he wasn't alone.

        “The translator might have mess up. For all we know we might not have a word for its title so it used princess as the closest thing.”

        Jonathan didn’t mean to issue an ultimatum like that. He was just so frustrated that his co-workers couldn't take things seriously without him there to watch over them. 

        “We will oversee the travel process,” Princess Luna declared, “And if anything happens, you will be answering for it.”

        Jonathan let out a mental sigh of relief. That could have gone much worse.

        “Wonderful, I’ll notify my associates. They should be here soon,” I smiled.
> Who Is This Six, And Why Were They Afraid of Seven?
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

        I was not looking forward to the prospect of handing our only way home over to anypony else, even if it was only for a short time. I was, however, unwilling to try to call the bluff of Jonathan Smith. If there were more of them, and it sounded like there were, I would have basically declared war on all of them. They would then have called upon the other species of the planet to aid them against the invading alien threat, and I most certainly did not want to have to do anything drastic. Like taking control of their sun and crashing it into the planet.  Admittedly it had been quite some time since I had not been in the seat of power during negotiations. Though I still believed I had handled the situation tactfully enough. 

        Jonathan Smith had made his way back over the hill, giving us the privacy to talk without it hearing. 

“Do not explain to these creatures any of how our technologies work,” I ordered the others, “And do not agree to anything without consulting me. That Jonathan Smith is crafty and it is obviously hiding something.”

        “Don’t worry. I know when to keep my mouth shut,” Quick Wit assured me, “And I don’t think you have to worry about the other two.”

        “Hey! I helped build this thing you know,” Double Take yelled at Quick Wit.

        “That is enough! The both of you be silent!” I only realized that I had slipped into The Royal Canterlot Voice by the fact that I had literally shouted the two off their hooves. I waited for the two to get back up before continuing, “The less information we give them the better. So far Jonathan Smith has been kind to us, but I expect that kindness has a price.”

        “Not to doubt your judgement princess, but that sounds really cynical,” Hard Stuff noted.

        I nodded and gave a sigh, “Yes, and it is unfortunate that I must reinstate that old habit of mine. The fact stands that one of Jonathan Smith’s first reactions was not to ensure we not hurt anypony, but to threaten us to make sure we did not. That means that it is no stranger to fighting, and quite possibly, war.”

        The others remained quiet, no doubt processing what I had just said. I noted the planet’s native birds chirping somewhere in the distance, as well as some other strange rumbling noise, comparable only to the sound of a distant waterfall, that would grow before fading out almost entirely, only to start again. In fact, after a moment’s observation it was clear that there was no real pattern to the frequency of the noise. Sometimes it would fade completely, other times it would remain almost constant. I supposed that I would figure out what made it in due time. 

        “Hello again!” I turned to see Jonathan Smith cresting the hill, one of his arms waving back and forth, with another three of his kind following him, “I return with friends!”

        “And how wonderful it is to be in the presence of friends!” I called back, walking to the edge of the platform.

        “Quite so,” Jonathan Smith gave a knowing smile as his group strode back to his previously occupied spot, “Allow me to introduce you all. The man to my immediate left is Thomas Franklin.” Thomas Franklin stood slightly taller than Jonathan Smith. Besides that and Thomas Franklin having a yellow mane the two appeared identical.

        “To his left is Jessica Miller.” This one was shorter than all the others and had a much longer mane done up in a ponytail. Jessica Miller also had two strange lumps on its chest.

        “And to my right is Rusty Bell.” Finally a name that sounded normal. Rusty Bell had a reddish brown mane that curved around its face. It took me a moment to realize that this was because it had a beard.

        “Uh, call me Russ please,” Rusty Bell requested.

        “Tom, Jessica, Russ, meet Princess Luna,” Jonathan Smith gestured to me with a open hand. The three accompanying him bowed their heads.

        “We suppose We should introduce our crew as well,” I turned to each of my companions in turn as I introduced them, “The unicorn is Quick Wit, the Pegasus is Double Take, and the Earth Pony is Hard Stuff.” As I said it, I realized how odd it was that they had named their planet a synonym for dirt. 

        “Hear that Rusty, you fit right in,” Thomas Franklin joked, elbowing Rusty Bell.

        “Eh, it probably has to do with the translator,” Rusty Bell shrugged, at least I assumed the action of lifting its shoulders was still called shrugging, “You know how some foreign languages use everyday words as names, it’s probably like that.” 

        “That reminds me!” Thomas Franklin lit up, moving its fingers in such a manner as to cause them to make a snapping noise, “Your female right? I mean, princess is still a female title where you’re from isn't it?”

        At first I thought the question very strange. Then I remembered that I had no clue what gender these creatures were, or indeed if they had genders at all. Despite their posture I could see no sign of reproductive organs on them. It did not seem too far fetched for them to be unable to tell our genders.

        “Yes, We are female, as is Quick Wit,” I nodded, watching Thomas Franklin smirk at Jessica Miller, “What of you all? We see no gender markings on any of you.”

        “H-hold on. That didn’t make any sense,” Jessica Miller put a hand to its head and held another out before it. It also had a higher pitched voice than the others. “We are female? Then you singled out Quick as also being female? Is she, like, twice as female as the rest of you?”

        “I think she’s using the royal we,” Jonathan Smith stated. The aliens all looked to me, seemingly for confirmation. I simply nodded.

        “And to answer your question, Jess is the only one of us that’s female. The rest of us are male,” Thomas Franklin jabbed a hand at Jessica Miller leaving only his outermost finger extended off to the side, “As for the reason you can’t tell our genders, we’re all wearing something called clothes.”

        “No clop Clover,” Quick Wit rolled her eyes, “Seriously, we have clothes too, we just don’t wear them all the time.”

        “To be fair, I didn’t know they were wearing clothes. I honestly thought their species just had a weird coat pattern,” Hard Stuff offered.

        “Yeah, come on. Admit it Wit, you didn’t know they were wearing clothes either,” Double Take used his wing to nudge the target of his teasings. Quick Wit returned the gesture with a glare.

        “You mentioned a translator?” I asked.

        “Yeah, I was wondering how that was still working if you all didn’t have a power supply,” Thomas Franklin put forth.

        I gave him a curious look and asked, “How does our power supply have anything to do with your translator?” 

        “We don’t have a translator, we assumed you were translating everything,” Jonathan Smith stated, trepidation leaking through his stoic facade.

        A moment of silence passed between us. Each group eyeing the other, everypony thinking the same thing, but no one breaking the silence.

        “Holy shit…” Rusty Bell muttered, “I mean, damn. Are we seriously speaking the same language? That… That’s ridiculous! Do you know how often words from languages that don't share a heritage lineup? I’ll tell you how often, virtually never. This is stupid! I mean it’s seriously stupid! It shouldn't be happening. It can’t happen, and yet it is! I never would have thought! Just… Damn.”

        Rusty Bell put a hand to his forehead and another to his lower back before proceeding to march back up the hill. 

        “So… what does this mean exactly?” Hard Stuff spoke up.

        “That we can talk to each other, duh,” Double Take helpfully supplied with a smirk plastered across his face.

        “Right, well… While our linguist ponders the mysteries of speech, would you all mind passing this to the other end of your ship so we can measure it?” Jessica Miller asked, holding out measuring tape.

        “Certainly,” I nodded, picking the object up in my telekinesis. Hooking one end onto the platform, I quickly slid it just above the floor, bringing it to rest on the other side. I brought my eyes away from my task and back to Jessica Miller, only to see her mouth hanging open.

        “Is something wrong?” I asked, trying to figure out what had elicited such a reaction from her.

        Jessica Miller blinked a few times and shook her head slightly before answering, “Ah, no. I, I just wasn't expecting that.” 

        Jessica eagerly went to grab the other end of the measuring tape. As I watched her, I internally grinned. They did not know that our horns were used to focus our magic. Of course, I still had no hints as to how they focused theirs either. That’s when Jessica Miller called out what I assumed was a measurement that I was unable to make heads or tails of.





        “Ten meters!” Jessica called to Jonathan, who noted the measurement in a pocket notebook. 

        “I’m sorry, what was that?” the amber winged horse, Jonathan thought its name was Double something-starting-with-a-T, asked.

        “Meters is one of our units of distance,” Jonathan stated as Jessica asked if Princess Luna could read out the measurement for the center pillar.

        “No, I mean the bit before that,” Double T clarified. Didn't it have something to do with a turn of phrase?

        “Ten?” Jonathan asked.

        “Yeah that word,” Double Tap, no that wasn't it, nodded, “What’s ten mean?”

        “It’s a number. You know, after nine but before eleven,” Jonathan answered.

        Double Trouble, not that either, tilted his head to the side, “Okay, nine I know, but what's eleven?”

        “Ok… So you guys only have nine numbers?" Jonathan asked.

        “No, we have one-zero numbers,” Double Take, that’s it, explained with a raised eyebrow.

        “One-zero? How do you count to one-zero?” Jonathan asked, wondering if he should call Russ back over.

        “One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, inta, neeb, one-zero, one-one, one-two and so on,” the unicorn rattled off.

        “Oh! You guys use base twelve!” exclaimed Tom, after seeing that everyone else was lost, Tom sighed and began to explain, “Ok, so you know how binary, just one and zero, is base two? Apparently not. It is though. Anyway, base twelve, or one-zero for you guys, uses twelve numbers: zero through nine, plus two more.”

        “So which of these bases do you use?” Princess Luna asked.

        “Base ten. So for the most part we'll understand each other's number system,” Tom continued, “Well, we have special cases like the first two numbers that have two digits and stuff, but that’s not important right now.”

        “So, care to try to read those numbers to me Princess?” Jessica asked.

        Princess Luna nodded and stretched out the measuring tape. Jonathan couldn't help but join Jessica and Tom in marveling at the fact that these creatures had developed mentally controllable mag-lev technology. Luna took a moment to look over the tape, searching for numbers she recognized before turning back to us.

        “We are unable to recognize any of these strange symbols.”






Project Gardener- Field report


Location: *REDACTED* Date:*REDACTED*


Report Number: *REDACTED*


Declassified


        At approximately 1:50 AM a farmer made a call to a local police station alerting them of a group of adolescents creating crop circles in their fields. This report quickly spiraled out of proportion, enough so that at 2:24 the NSA picked up on the inordinate amount of emergency calls from the one farm. A call to a State Trooper on the scene revealed that the situation was, despite the crowed gathered, nowhere near under control. He then requested back up in the form of, “whatever secret alien police thing ya got.”
        Project Gardener agents *REDACTED* were dispatched to the scene. After taking control and dismissing the other emergency response teams, a monitoring station was set up and reconnaissance began. A ship that appeared to be open-air was found resting peacefully on a slight slope. The ground and crops showed no signs of disturbance save where the ship had touched down. 
        The ship was five meters in diameter and had a central pillar, made of a material later identified as quartz, was roughly four meters high. There were four “stations” on the ship, each facing outwards across from each other around the central pillar. Each station was equipped with a chair that was roughly fifteen cm off the floor and a “computer”. The computers appeared to be the stations themselves. Each computer was roughly a meter high, a meter wide, and 50 cm deep. A roughly 40 cm by 40 cm square hole was centered in each, appearing to be where a “screen” was displayed into the air. Between each station was another set of boxes. The functions of these boxes was not determined as of the writing of this report. 
        The ship had eight “landing pads” of 25 cm radius spaced out evenly around its edges. It was assumed that these landing pads were also used as steps onto and off of the ship as the base was suspended thirty cm above the ground. The material used for the hull of the ship appeared to be, and was later confirmed as, wood. Specifically Oak wood.  The materials for the rest of the ship were stone or metal, the exact composition of which is unknown as of the writing of this report. 
        Four quadrupedal extraterrestrials were found on board the ship. Three of them rose roughly to the hip, the last to the chest. One of these appeared to be a white miniature horse save for the depiction of a barrel present upon its rear. Another of these E.T.s looked like the mythical unicorn, save much smaller. It was fern green with a darker green mane and tail. Again a strange image was found on its rear, this time of a gridded map. A Pegasus, for all intents and purposes, was the third occupant of the craft. It was amber with a dark blue mane and tail. An image of a soldering iron was present on this one. 
        The last being on the craft was a midnight blue winged unicorn. It’s mane and tail appeared to be filled with stars and constantly waved in the absence of, and sometimes against, any breeze. This one wore an onyx crown upon her head and a chest piece with the marking of a crescent moon on it. Silver colored boots were also worn upon its person.
        All of the occupants of the craft were alive and well at the time of the agents arrival.  It was observed that the subjects were speaking English, it was later learned that no translator was being used. Listening in to their conversation alerted us that their craft was broken, though the exact nature of the damage was not discussed. It is worth noting that during one of the subjects discussions they mentioned *REDACTED*. This sounds extremely unlikely, but they did demonstrate mentally controlled mag-lev abilities on a small scale. Caution is advised during further interactions. Agent *REDACTED* initiated first contact shortly after sunrise. They were non-hostile and reluctantly accepted help to fix their broken craft. 
        While taking measurements of the ship it was discovered that the creatures used base twelve, and that they did not recognize our numbers. It was then quickly determined that their writing system differed from ours, both in letters and numbers. Further examination into the phenomenon is recommended.

        It is recommended that we move them to *REDACTED*. Two *REDACTED* helicopters will work, though three are preferable. The team of agents can bring the specimens to the base in their van. Moving them under the cover of night and as soon as possible is highly preferable. Tomorrow at 2:30 AM would be preferable. 



> Sweet Dreams Are Made Of What?
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

        Jonathan looked over his report in the mid morning light. He shook his head as he thought about the stir it would cause when it was finally declassified. Jonathan looked across the table at Jessica and Tom who were keeping an eye and ear on the extraterrestrials that had ‘accidentally’ wound up on Earth. Russ had on a sleep blind and was lying on one of the cots they had brought. Apparently he had decided to sleep on the language ‘problem’. Jonathan didn’t see how it was a problem, but then again, he had enough on his plate to worry about.

        “Status report?” Jonathan asked.

        “Well our princess-in-exile is standing guard. The others all seem to be sleeping,” Jessica stated before turning to Tom, “But because someone won’t give up the headphones I don’t know for sure!”

        “It’s not my fault you don’t have the authorization to use them,” both Tom’s face and his voice failed to hide his amusement.

        “Oh, so that mumbling from Russ authorized you to use them?” Jessica quipped.

“Yes,” Tom stuck out his tongue.

“You are so immature,” Jessica grumbled.

        “Both of you shut up. I’m taking the headphones,” Jonathan snached the head mounted speakers off of Tom and fitted them around him own ears.

        “I was using those!” Tom made a grab for the aforementioned equipment that was quickly stopped when Jonathan held up a hand. Through the headphones Jonathan could hear light snoring, no doubt from one of their guests. But what caught his attention was that the princess was talking to herself.

        “Still thyself Luna. Thou art not at fault. Thou tryest thy best to remedy this predicament. Thy vessel shalt be repaired and thou will voyage home...”

        “What the hell? Is that archaic?” Jonathan asked, pulling the headphones off and handing them to Jessica.

        “As far as I can tell. What that means is beyond me,” Tom shrugged before adding with a snicker, “I’m sure Rusty will have another conniption over it though.”

        Jonathan rolled his eyes, “Right. Jessica, you have first watch. Wake Russ up when you’re done. Tom, stop bothering her and get to sleep, we’ve all had a long day and I need everyone alert for tonight when the helicopters come to pick up their ship.”

        “Alright, alright. Morning everybody,” Tom snickered at his joke. 

        “Yeah, well, night to you too asshole,” Jessica responded, slipping on the headphones. Her eyes widened and she quickly began jotting down notes on what she was hearing.





        “Thou shalt message thy sister. We are most certain that she is distressed over thy vanishment. It will sooth her greatly to learn of thy safety,” I was pacing around the platform. As foalish as it was, I still found talking to myself outloud to help me think through particularly difficult problems. Then of course, there was me slipping back into the dialect used before my imprisonment. Though I could talk using the modern slang and such, when I was alone or sufficiently stressed I still reverted my antiquated style of speech. 

        Though I did not want to leave the others unguarded, I figured a quick trip wouldn’t be an issue. Besides, our hostess seemed very hesitant to step onto our platform. Whatever the reason for their trepidation was, it suited my purposes. A brief dream walk to talk to Tia, then right back to keeping vigil. After casting a spell that would alert me if anything got close to the platform, I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

 I have been told that the process I use to enter dreams is very similar to that of meditation. I stilled my mind, focusing only on the image of the door I used to enter the dream state. Now I did not have to use a door. Often when entering ponies’ dreams I did not, but I found it helped them understand that a transition was happening, so I adopted it when guiding ponies around the dream state. Eventually it became habit. Plus it is easier to enter the dream state when one has an object to focus on, and with all the things that were clouding my mind at the time, I knew it would be necessary for this trip. 

        With some extra coxing however, I found myself before my dream door. It was black with silver edging and had, predictably, a raised relief of the moon adorning its face. It opened and I stepped into the starry void that was the space between dreams. I willed the door to Tia’s dreams before me. Celestia's dream door is white with gold trim and has a sun emblazoned onto it. Much to my surprise, no door appeared before me. Such had happened before when I had been distracted, but never had no door shown itself. Puzzled, I made a second attempt, but again my efforts went unanswered. 

        I decided to try a different approach. The doors of those physically close to me flew in, the walls to an invisible hallway keeping them lined up on either side of me. Immediately in front of me, were three normal doors. I knew those belonged to Double Take, Quick Wit, and Hard Stuff. Ignoring them, I turned around and looked at the door immediately to the left of my own. I do not know what I expected one of our host’s doors to look like, but what was before me caused me unease. It was big, much too big to be a pony's door, that was the main reason I knew it had to belong to one of our hosts. It had a sheen to it that I recognised as belonging to one of those plastic materials that had been discovered during my banishment. The door was colored a drab light gray with two strange symbols adorning it’s face. One was a horizontal line that had another line extending down from its middle. This second line went straight down before curving around and climbing halfway back up its length. The second symbol looked like a circle that been cut vertically in half and had one side flipped so that it was below the other.

        I had been in the dreams of other species before. On occasion visiting delegates would have nightmares that I would calm. But the dream of a creature from another world... I puzzled over what it might contain. At the very least it would give me a glimpse of their society and customs. I found myself unable to contain my curiosity. After all, just a quick peek would be harmless. If it had anything to do with us, I would simply leave. No damage done. With that foolproof plan in mind I opened the door. 

        “I, for one, welcome our new equine overlords. Ah your majesty! We were just talking about you,” Jonathan Smith and the other of his kind with him bowed as I stepped into the dream. We were in an ovaloid room, a rug with what looked like an eagle on it was laid before a rather impressive looking desk with a golden throne behind it.

        “Excuse me?” I asked. Why did it sound like he was expecting me? Did he know about my dream walking abilities?

        “It was all good things I assure you,” Jonathan Smith quickly added, “What can I do for you today, my queen?”

        “Queen? You are confused, we are a princess. Not a queen,” I corrected him.

“I know that the crowning is not for a few days your highness, but it is still unofficially your title,” Jonathan Smith explained. 

“Whatever are you talking about?” the mention of me being a queen brought memories of the Nightmare to the front of my mind, “We no longer have any intention of becoming queen.”

“Of course! Have you decided on the title of Empress then?” Jonathan Smith asked.

I opened my mouth but hesitated. Eventually I found my tongue, “Jonathan Smith, you are aware you are dreaming, yes?”

        “Of course!”Jonathan Smith responded with a bow. Before I could determine if horror or relief was the proper reaction he continued, “It is such a dream come true to be your advisor of human affairs.” 

        Then, as if I was not befuddled enough, Quick Wit marched into the room and threw a salute, “The fleet will be ready to launch soon Empress Luna! Your usurpers will never know what hit them!”

        I stared at Jonathan Smith’s mental representation of Quick Wit as I tried to fathom what was happening around me. 

        “Empress Luna, perhaps it would be best for you to get some rest before the invasion. Allow me to escort you to your quarters,” Jonathan Smith offered. I dumbly nodded and walked through the door than he had opened for me. I found it most peculiar how there was no hallway between what I assumed was the throne room and this bedroom. I also found some of the furnishings rather disturbing; such as the throne made of a combination of swords and skulls or the fact that the miniscule lighting present was provided by an open fire pit. The shark tank seemed quite out of place and I had not even the foggiest notion about the strange contraptions that were attached to the sharks’ heads. 

        The sleeping arrangements looked wonderful however. The bed itself was heart shaped and red, not something I was used to, but who was I to judge their culture? Several pillows of varying shades of pink and purple were piled onto the bed's head. The set was encompassed by a canopy that I was unable to determine the color of, but I assumed to be either blue or black. 

        “Enjoy your highness,” Jonathan Smith flourished with a bow, “If there is anything you require, simply ask and I will personally see to your comfort.”

        “Yes, well, there is one thing,” I hesitated. I could tell Jonathan Smith knew I was struggling to word my request.

        “Anything, Empress Luna. Just name it,” Jonathan Smith seemed much too enthused by the current situation.

        I turned to look Jonathan Smith in the eyes, “I want you to answer honestly.”

        Jonathan Smith nodded, keeping his gaze locked with mine.

        “Are you actually enjoying this? Do you not find this situation a nightmare?” I asked.

        “I can honestly say it is anything but,” Jonathan Smith smiled, “And do you want to know why?”

        I nodded. Jonathan Smith knelt beside the bed and reached down for something. 

        “Because by the power invested in me by the United States government, I’m placing you under arrest,” Jonathan Smith’s hand pulled back up to reveal a small black device that he then pointed at my head. I suddenly found my hooves bound together. Looking down I discovered that a blue glow surrounded my legs.

        “Surprised?” Jonathan asked, “You know how we said that in order to rule the Earth we’d need a blood sample? We lied. We used that to reverse engineer the nanobots that allow you to levitate things. We also created a type of nanobots that would prevent you from using yours. So don’t bother trying.”

        I had no idea what he was going on about. Something about my blood being used to levitate things I think. Did this mean that their blood was a magical focus? This would make no sense though, since Jonathan Smith stated they needed mine. 

        “Yes, this whole thing has been carefully orchestrated since I originally learned of your plans. You thought you were keeping them hidden, but it was always quite clear what you were after,” Jonathan Smith bragged, “You don’t actually rule anywhere, all of those people you’ve seen were just acting. Everything has been staged. Agents run ahead to set things up, then after you’ve passed through, everything goes back to normal. We’ve been in control this entire time.”

 This of course was completely false. He still had no idea this was a dream which meant I had total control over what happened. Still, I decided to play along to discover they type of things to expect should our relations sour.

“You’ll never get away with this! My servants will rescue me!” I warned him. 

“Oh? You mean those other three that we’ve already captured? I don’t think they’ll be helping you any time soon,” Jonathan Smith grinned, “Come along now, there are places you need to be.”

        Suddenly the feeling of the floor disappeared from beneath my hooves. Jonathan Smith floated me through the same door we entered, but instead of the throne room from before we were greeted by pristine white walls. Another one of Jonathan Smith’s kind sat behind a metal desk. This one had a pointy patch of hair growing on his chin. He stood when we entered the room. 

        “Agent Smith. Wonderful job,” the stallion praised, a small smile gleamed on his face, “I thought everything that could have gone wrong did. If we had known that it wasn’t a hoax, I think the Earth would be under the foot of our friend here. But as it was, we were lucky that another team wasn’t sent. That was a beautiful plan you came up with Smith, simply beautiful.”

        “Thank you sir,” Jonathan Smith saluted.

        “Please call me by my name, we are equals now,” the stallion reached his hand towards Jonathan Smith.

        “Really? Thank you, sir!” Jonathan Smith took the other stallion’s hand in his and the two shook their hands up and down in a hoofshake. A handshake, if you will.

        “Yes, now come. There are things I must show you,” the stallion lead Jonathan Smith off. I floated in the room, apparently forgotten. I was very surprised that anyone would simply leave a prisoner alone in the office of somepony that was obviously quite high up in a government job. But the curiosites had yet to stop. Less than a second after Jonathan Smith had left the room it started to fade. I quickly unbound myself and flew over to the desk. 

There were only four items on it. One was a flat black box set to rest so that it was pointing up in the air. I ignored that. The next was a horizontal black board with multiple studs on it. Besides the confusing symbols in it, the board lacked anything of note. Next there was a small black object that was entirely curves besides the bottom. As I could find no obvious function for it, I decided that I would come back to it. The last item appeared to be a name plate. Once again, I found my inability to read their script to be quite the hindrance. I quickly focused on the lettering, keeping it from fading any further. Then I tried to reach into Jonathan Smith’s mind, searching for the meaning out of the words to display before me. Much to my surprise, it worked. Before me floated a cane, a belt of black fabric knotted together halfway between the ends and the middle, and a penis.

        I decided that my efforts were unsuccessful and let the objects fade. Shaking my head in bafflement, I summoned the door back to the hall of dreams to contact my sister.





        “For why do the fates conspire against me this eve!?” I shouted, grinding my hoof into the nonexistent floor. Celestia’s door was nowhere to be found. In fact, besides the doors of my companions, all of the doors were the large doors of our hosts. And there seemed to be an endless number of them. I had lined all of the doors up and made them to fly single file in front of me. Any door that was too large in size was to be passed over, allowing me to focus only on the doors of my little ponies. I had started slowly, allowing myself to glimpse each door, but had quickly lost interest. Now they were tearing past me at such a breakneck speed they all blurred into one solid wall, and there was still no end in sight.

I was unable to fathom how many beings must live on this planet to present such an overwhelming number of dreams. I most certainly did not envy their dream guardian. I was barely able to cover one of every few hundred nightmares a night. I imagined they might never visit certain ponies during the entirety of their lives. 

With a growl of frustration, followed by a sigh of defeat, the wall of doors vanished and was replaced with my own door. I had wasted enough time attempting to contact Celestia. I would simply have to try again another time. After all, I sensed dusk approaching and wanted to be there to see the manner in which the moon was raised.





        Jonathan Smith grunted as a hand shoved him awake. 

        “Jonathan, time to get up,” Russ informed him.

        “Yeah it’s bedtime, dude! What are you doing sleeping?” Tom teased.

        “I swear to god if my dream winds up happening I’m going to let her kill you,” Jonathan muttered.

        “What was that?” Tom asked.

        “Nothing to worry about,” Jonathan assured Tom before mentally adding a single word:

Hopefully.


> But If You Are In Here, How Are We Moving?
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Explain this plan of yours to Us again,” I requested.

        Jonathan Smith let out a sigh before taking a deep breath, “The plan is to fly your ship to our base. While that is happening, my team and I will drive you all to our base.”

        “By ‘your ship’ do you mean the platform?” I asked glancing down at the wood flooring of our platform. Jonathan nodded, “And how do you propose to do that? Without power our levitation field will not work and it is most certainly too heavy for anypony to lift.”

        “We won’t be carrying it. We might not have faster than light travel, but we are advanced enough to accomplish heavier-than-air flight,” for some reason Jonathan glared at me as though I had offended him. I raised an eyebrow. Heavier-than-air flight was extremely basic, pegasi proved that everyday. And what did he mean by ‘faster than light travel’? At a little over 11,000,000 lengths per second, nothing moves faster than light. Well, except teleportation, but that may or may not be ‘actual’ movement. 

See, there is an age old question about whether teleportation is movement or not. Even with the increase in precision of timing implements, scientists still are unable to determine the amount of time that it takes to teleport from point A to point B. Several ponies say that, as time always averages out to be statistically insignificant from zero, time must be zero. And as time is zero, and speed is a measure of distance over time, you have no speed when you teleport, thus you’re not technically exceeding the speed of light. Other ponies say that we just don’t have sufficiently precise instruments yet. Long ago I learned to avoid the topic as no solid proof can be put forth either way.

        Jonathan Smith suddenly tensed up before hesitantly asking, “Can you breathe our atmosphere?”

         I took a deep breath and held it for a second before exhaling. When Jonathan Smith’s look of anticipation did not disappear from my demonstration, I answered him, “Your planet’s atmosphere is perfectly breathable.”

        “Phew. For a second I was concerned we would have to bring in some crazy gear so that you all could breath during the ride,” Jonathan Smith let out a relieved chuckle.

        “Yes, that would have been… bad,” I was seeing Jonathan Smith in a new light after his dream, and I was not quite sure how to proceed, “We are sure you have preparations for the trip to work on. We will inform Our crew of the plan.”

        “Sounds good,” Jonathan Smith nodded. I turned and walked to the middle of the platform where the others were still sleeping. After glancing back to make sure Jonathan Smith was indeed walking away, I awoke my comrades.

        “Quick Wit, Double Take, awaken,” I commanded, “Hard Stuff, stop pretending to be asleep.”

        “Oh come on! I was doing such a good job too.” Hard Stuff grumbled.

        “Next time, do not try to fool the Princess of Dreams,” I grinned at his antics. 

        “Morning already?” Double Take yawned.

        “In a sense,” I told him, “Soon we are to leave for a more comfortable location, or so I’ve been told. We shall get ready for our departure.”

        “Sounds good, let me just pack all this stuff I brought,” Quick Wit rubbed some sleep from her eyes before blinking twice, “Oh look, I’m done.”

        “Very well then,” I nodded, “Let us be off.”

        I hopped down onto the ground of the planet for the first time. It truly was eerie how one could forget they were not still on Equestria. The soil under my hooves felt the same, gravity held the same pull, the chirping of birds and the rustling of the wind was no different. When I focused on the air however, I did notice that something was off about it. It was somehow heavier, almost like after one had brushed a layer of dust off an old object, but even that did not seem right; as at the same time the air felt empty. I was unable to figure out what, if anything, was missing or added. 

        The others followed my lead. Hard Stuff and Quick Wit used one of the levitation buffers as a step down. Double Take jumped off the platform but failed to achieve flight. After hitting the ground Double Take made a ‘you didn’t see that’ face and proceeded to walk. Together the four of us climbed the hill over which Jonathan Smith and his crew presumably awaited. I must admit, when we crested the hill the sight was underwhelming. Our four hosts were stuffing the last of what must have been their camp into black boxes. I briefly wondered why they seemed to love the color black so much.

 Behind them and off to the right was an odd building. The architectural style was unlike anything from Equestria. The walls loosely resembled those of a wooden cabin, save the planks were white and the bottom of each plastic looking plank overlapped the top of the one blow it. The reddish-gray roof was tiled with what looked like extremely thick sandpaper. The windows and door looked normal enough, considering that like the rest of the house they had been scaled up to allow for comfortable habitation by the natives.

        Next to the house on a gravel path were two things best described as metal carriages. Both had four wheels and an enclosed cabin for the passengers. The one closest to the house was red with two chairs inside with a wagon bed protruding to form the back two thirds. The other had two front seats, but the rest of it was enclosed by black metal. The rear of the second carriage was swung open by Thomas Franklin. They four natives then proceed to load all of the boxes in to the back.

        “Are we all ready to go?” asked Jonathan Smith, turning to face my team. 

        “We are,” I nodded.

        “Great,” Jonathan Smith smiled, “Russ, you drive. Tom, you get shotgun.”

        With that command, Rusty Bell and Thomas Franklin climbed in through the front doors. Jonathan Smith gestured for us to enter the back of the carriage. Inside the back of the carriage was surprisingly cramped for how big it looked. This was due to all of the black boxes stacked on shelves along the left wall. The other wall had four seats backed up against it. I hopped into the furthest seat. I fit surprisingly well in it for something made for another species. We did not leave any of the four seats for our hosts as we assumed they would be pulling the carriage, but when they stepped inside and closed the door I made to stand.

        “You should sit,” Jonathan Smith held up a hand with his palm facing towards me. Then he grabbed hold of the shelf, “Without hands it’s kind of hard to hold onto things.”

        “Wait. If we’re all in here, who’s going to pull the carriage?” Double Take asked.

        “Pull the carriage?” Jessica Miller asked. 

        Suddenly there was a continuous roar from the front of the carriage. I instinctively flared my wings and charged my horn. Nothing seemed to have changed though, save all of the natives giving me concerned looks. 

        “Have you guys never heard an engine before?” Rusty Bell asked.

        “That was an engine!?” Quick Wit asked in disbelief. I was having similar thoughts myself. 

        “I’ve never heard trains make this much noise outside of breaking,” Hard Stuff stated. I nodded in agreement.

        “Wait, train? As in, a steam engine?” Rusty Bell asked, “This is a combustion engine.”

        “Combustion…?” Double Take asked.

        “You mean the engine is exploding!?” Quick Wit yelled jumping off her seat and making for the door.

        “NO! Of course not! The engine isn’t exploding. A combustion engine is powered by explosions, like a steam engine is powered by steam,” Rusty Bell explained.

        “Is that what is creating the growling noise?” I asked.

        “Interesting way to describe it,” Rusty Bell nodded, “And yes, the rumbling is caused by the controlled explosions.”

        As I pondered how such a system might work, my balance shifted, indicating the carriage had begun moving.

        “Would it not be simpler to power such a system with magic?” I asked, thinking of the rare self propelled carriages from back home.

        I was practically thrown from my seat as the carriage ground to a halt. Quick Wit, in fact, was thrown from her seat into me, and Double Take had grabbed Hard Stuff in an embrace to remain on his seat. All of the others were staring at me.

        “I can’t tell if you’re making fun of us or you’re serious,” Thomas Franklin stated.

        “You all have the capacity to melt quartz, surely you can power an engine with less energy than that,” I stated. A silence descended upon us, broken only by the growling of the engine.

        Rusty Bell finally broke the silence, “You know, this supports my theory that a third party of aliens modified our languages as a cosmic joke.”

        “I still say that sounds ridiculous,” Jessica Miller rolled her eyes.

        “And I say that the eldritch god of chaos, The Ittever, decided that there was not enough randomness in our worlds. Thus he modified our languages, instated quantum mechanics, and invented windchimes, Legos, and Youtube comments. All hail the Ittever!” declared Thomas Franklin, throwing his hands into the air.

        For a brief second I feared that Thomas Franklin was serious.

        “Okay then… Third party aliens it is,” Jessica Miller cautiously announced.

        “Why? What’s wrong with magic” Quick Wit asked.

        “Oh, nothing. Ya know, besides the fact that it doesn’t exist,” Jessica explained, “So obviously our definition of ‘magic’ and your definition of ‘magic’ are two separate things.”

        “So magic is not the use of will to shape energies into selected actions?” I asked.

        “Nooooo,” Jonathan Smith stated, “Magic is something from fairy tales that children believe in.”

        “Are you telling me you all have never discovered magic?” Quick Wit asked.

        “If it was there to discover we would have. But as things are, it’s not there to be discovered,” Jessica Miller stated.

        “Are you trying to claim that magic doesn’t exist!” Quick Wit yelled, “You saw Princess Luna pick up a tape measure with her levitation!”

        “Yes, yes we get it,” Jonathan Smith grumbled, his glare shifting over all of us, “‘Sufficiently advanced Technology is indistinguishable from magic,’ Arthur Clarke’s third law. This wasn’t funny to begin with, now stop it.”

        “Perhaps more proof would convince you?” I mused, charging up my horn. I briefly considered lifting the carriage, but decided that if lifting one thing doesn’t convince them, lifting a bigger object would not change anything. Teleportation was out as I had no idea where it would be safe to teleport to. 

        “No,” Quick Wit stuck a hoof in front of my face before pointing at our hosts, “We don’t need to prove magic. You need to disprove it.”

        “Most metal objects, such as the tape measure, can be lifted through magnetism. A mental link with a computer, such as your ships, would allow for seemingly spontaneous levitation,” Jessica Miller leaned back and crossed her arms in front of her body.

        “Our ship’s battery oxidized, we have no power,” Double Take shot back.

        “When compressed quartz generates electric currents,” Tomas Franklin countered.

        “Why in Equestria would we use electricity to power the platform?” Quick Wit asked.

        “What else would you use?” shouted Jessica Miller.

        “Magic!” Quick Wit shot back.

        “Magic doesn’t exist!” Jessica Miller yelled.

        “HEY!” the deep voice of Hard Stuff boomed in the metal confines of the carriage, “I think I have a solution; we will keep thinking it’s magic, but not say anything, and you all will keep thinking it’s whatever you think it is and not say anything.” 

        “Only until we can examine your ship. Then we’ll see what powers it,” Jessica Miller declared.

        A relative silence filled the carriage. I found myself examining all the instruments, or more specifically, their black cases.

        “Why do you have such fascination with the color black?” I asked, “I have noticed a the trend and I can see no reason for it.”

        “Everything’s black because…” Jonathan Smith started, “Well… Um, you see… I actually have no idea on this one.”

        “It’s cheaper to produce things in one color rather than many, and as black and white go with everything, you wind up seeing them a lot,” Thomas Franklin explained.

        Again we found ourselves in a conversational lull. I watched Rusty Bell steer the carriage down the deserted road.

        “So what are you guys exactly? I mean, you look like the lower half of a minotaur with the top half of a centaur,” Double Take joked. I saw Quick Wit roll her eyes at Double Take’s attempt to insert a lighthearted feeling into his words.

        “We call ourselves Humans. Though Earthlings works too,” Thomas Franklin cracked a smile at his words.

        “Interesting observation there,” Jonathan Smith put a hand to his chin, “As centaurs and minotaurs are based of a human combined with the defining trait of another animal, it’s more accurate to say that they are half human.”

        “Hold on a second,” Rusty Bell interjected, “You mean you guys have myths with minotaurs and centaurs too?”

        “Of course, every race has myths they tell about themselves,” I nodded, “It is best not be believe their bragging though. Time distorts the truth as I was loathe to discover.”

        “So you guys live on a planet with not only unicorns and pegasuses,” Jonathan Smith began a smile creeping onto his face.

        “Pegasi,” Double Take interjected.

        “Unicorns and Pegasi. But also Minotaurs and centaurs?” Jonathan Smith finished.

        I nodded, “Yes, we also have griffins, deerfolk, zebras, buffalo, and yaks to name a few. Tell me, with what other creatures share your planet?”

        “Haha! This is great!” Jonathan Smith broke into a fit of giggles.

        “We have deer, zebras, buffalo, and yaks too, but griffins are just myths,” Thomas Franklin stated, “Or rather; here, griffins are just myths .”

        “More fuel for my third alien hypothesis,” Rusty Bell proclaimed.

        “Well I would very much still like to meet with those that are here if I may,” I was never one to turn down a chance for diplomacy, even if I did sometimes hope that it was a miserable failure.

        “Sure, we can probably work it out for you to see some of them,” Jonathan Smith shrugged, “I doubt they’ll be much different than those back on your planet. That is, if Russ is correct.”

        “Wonderful! I look forward to meeting with them,” I inwardly cheered. Perhaps this planet was not as outlandish as it appeared. Perhaps my initial assessment was right, perhaps this world was very much like Equestria. Save the humans that we now found ourselves traveling with. And then a thought struck me, the humans that we are relying upon. The same humans that now have control of our platform. After all, Jessica Miller stated that they too could use levitation. Could they not also have blinking? Though advanced technologically, our platform used those two spells for almost all of its major functions. Could the humans then reverse engineer our craft, like in Jonathan Smith’s dream? If relations sour, could they not invade while Equestria was still unaware of their very existence? We would need to tread carefully.

        Perhaps… perhaps not arguing the point of magic's existence would be for the best. 

        “Russ what’s our ETA?” Jonathan Smith asked.

        “About fifteen minutes,” Rusty Bell stated.

        “Wonderful,” Jonathan Smith smiled. My mind immediately went back to his dream. And to the unfortunate events that had transpired there. A tingle ran down my spine and despite my best efforts to, I was sure that my wings shifted. We would need to tread very, very carefully.
> When Will Dinner be Served?
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

        The rest of the ride I spent watching the world go by out of the carriage's front window. Not that there was much to see. First, it was very dark. Normally this would not be a problem for me, but the carriage had two bright lights shining in front of it that kept my night vision from activating. Second, the only windows were in the front of the carriage, severely limiting my range of vision. Lastly, we spent almost the entirety of the ride on a large paved road with walls running along the sides. Why the walls were there I had not the foggiest idea. Nor was I sure of why the road was so wide or why a second, just as wide road, ran alongside it. 

        We soon turned off onto a smaller road that was still much too wide for the carriage. This road had brick and concrete buildings placed along it every so often. I should state that these were not small buildings, though they had only one story, each contained multiple of what I could only assume were stores. After two of these, I decided to look at the next one from the side to determine how deep they were, but instead a black iron fence took up the side of the road. 

        “Here we are, government facility, sweet government facility,” Rusty Bell muttered as we turned onto a road that lead through the fencing. I had found the need to lean into the turns to keep from being knocked over. I still didn’t have it quite right though, so my wings flared out trying to catch the air and my face gracefully met the seat to my right. I heard Thomas Franklin snicker at my inability to remain upright when gravity teamed up with inertia to pull me in a way that was not straight down. It made me feel better about my blunder to feel that Quick Wit had once again found her face pressed into my side. Thankfully she had managed to turn her head so as not to spear me with her horn. 

        I looked out the front window again. In front of us were several more brick buildings, roads, some grass, and paved walkways in the areas in between. We followed a road around the cluster of buildings and found ourselves in an illuminated paved field with a bizarre pattern of white lines covering it. A few other carriages were scattered around the field, most of them being at the far end in front of a massive glass structure. The building looked extremely out of place, it was as if somepony had taken one of the skyscrapers from Manehattan and placed it in the middle of nowhere. 

That’s when I realized that this facility was missing one very important thing.

“Where are all the guards?” I asked.

        “Inside,” Jonathan Smith explained, “Everyone knows that outsourced government work is done here, and having armed guards patrolling would make it look like it had something worth guarding. So we use the cover of a known facility to hide a secret facility. No one suspects it.” 

        “Mainly because it’s so stupid,” Jessica Miller pointed out.

        “Yes, but it works,” Jonathan Smith shrugged, “Anyway, we’ll be entering using the loading dock around back. Then we’ll show your your lodgings.”





        We walked down a beige, sterile hallway lined with doors labeled in their strange alphabet. Jonathan Smith quickly turned us into a corridor away from the windows. If it was not for the fact that we were walking with aliens while stranded on another planet, it would have been the dullest walk of my life.

        “Our wing is just up ahead,” Jonathan Smith explained, “It’s mostly offices, but we also have a lounge and some holding cel-. I mean bedrooms! Bedrooms that we sometimes take naps in… But only on the slow days!”

        “So everyday is a slow day?” Thomas Franklin asked with a smirk.

        “Hush you. We’ll keep out of the ones you all are using though,” promised Jonathan Smith, “So do you all want the girls in one room and they guys another?”

        “Oh, no! I wouldn’t dream of forcing a princess to room with me. I can... room with the guys,” Quick Wit reluctantly offered, her enthusiasm quickly tapering off. Actually she could dream of such, and she had on at least two occasions. Both were with Twilight Sparkle. Now I know what you’re thinking, and no; both times they pulled all nighters researching and studying.

        “Err… we do have six rooms. You all can each get a room to yourself,” Jessica Miller noted.

        “Oh thank Celestia,” Quick Wit sighed. I glared disapprovingly at her, but otherwise ignored her inappropriate use of my sister’s name. Now was not a good time to go into the problems with that statement.

        “Here we are, the Project Gardener wing. Now for everyone’s safety, we’re going to have to ask that you remain inside of these doors,” Jonathan Smith explained, swiping a card through a slot in the wall. The double doors taking up the end of the hallway swung open, revealing a hallway exactly like the one we were already in. Another set of doors was at the end of this hallway, and Jonathan Smith once again swiped a card to get the doors to open. That’s when I realized that something was wrong, though I couldn’t yet place my hoof on it. 

        Inside these doors was a lounge looking room. The side walls were mostly lined with desks  separated from each other by fuzzy walls. These desks reminded me much of the one I saw in Jonathan Smith’s dream. A flat box upright against the wall, a studded board and a curvy rock-like thing before it. All black of course. Though four of the desks had different things hanging to the fuzzy walls; pictures, what I assumed to be calenders, and sheets of paper with their writing on it.

        The middle of the room was outfitted with a couch and some chairs forming a semicircle around a, surprise, surprise, black box hanging on the wall. Everything being colored black was one thing, but none of these boxes had any visible use! They were too thin to contain anything substantial. A picture maybe, but why keep a picture covered? Especially if it is the focal point of the room! There were no buttons or switches on most of these useless things. Why in Equestria did humans have so many of them?

        “It’s a nice TV isn’t it?” Thomas Franklin asked. He had noticed me staring at this teavee box. luckily my hatred and confusion about the object were easily masked by years of practice during diplomatic relations. 

        “Yes, it is very… Black,” I stated.

        “It’s big,” Hard Stuff noted with a slight nod.

        “I really like its… ability to hang on a wall?” Double Take just barely kept himself from sounding totally confused, and instead sounded only mostly confused.

        Quick Wit, was not afraid to ask what the rest of us were thinking though, “Annnd what does it do exactly?”

        The humans all looked at each other, Quick Wit, and then the teavee. 

        “We need to show them Men In Black,” Jonathan Smith declared in a tone that was a mix of excitement and anger.

        “How about no,” Jessica Miller responded with fake cheer.

        “E.T. then,” Jonathan Smith’s conviction about showing us this device’s use was very clear.

        “Let’s not forever ruin human-alien relations with a possibly offensive move,” Jessica Miller stated.

        “I’m going to have to go with Jess on this,” Thomas Franklin cut in, “I don’t think showing them any of the movies we have is a good idea. At least not until they have a firm grasp of our actual culture.”

        Jonathan Smith didn’t seem upset by this, in fact he looked even more excited.

        “So we can show them later?” He grinned. I did not like how he grinned. 

        “Just go do your paperwork while we get them settled,” Jessica Miller sighed, pushing Jonathan Smith to one of the desks.

        “While Jessica distracts him, we’ll show you to your rooms,” Rusty Bell gestured with an arm towards the hallway on the left of the room. As I followed our host, I briefly wondered where the hallway on the right went, but I assumed I would find out later. Like the doors to the foyer, the doors to our rooms also locked from the outside. What had necessitated this building being constructed like a prison? I hopped there was some unknown aspect of their culture that explained it, but in the front of my head I worried that we really were their prisoners.

        I made my way to the second room on the left. The inside was spacious but plain. Besides the bed, there was a large mirror that took up most of one of the walls. That was it, a bed and a mirror. It was far from what I was used to, but it wouldn’t hurt me to have to do without some of the finer things in life. 

        “This bed is huge!” Double Take yelled from the next room over. I looked back at the bed and realized that, while my bed back home was a little wider and shorter, for most ponies this bed would be twice to three times the size they needed. Sometimes I forget how spoiled I am.

I walked back into the hallway and saw Jonathan Smith talking with another human. I recognised this human though. It was the human from his dream the day before. Jonathan Smith was clearly nodding and fidgeting more during his conversation with this human. Despite this his eyes remained firmly locked on the black sunglasses this other human wore… inside… at night. I started to doubt that I would ever understand human culture.

One instance of Cadance’s breathing exercise later, I walked out for an introduction. The human from the dream nodded once more to Jonathan Smith before turning to me. Jonathan Smith turned to see what had captured his partners attention and noticed me. He tensed up for a moment, before sliding forward so that he was between the two of us without blocking our view of each other. 

        Jonathan Smith pointed towards me with his hand and began the introduction.“Sir, this is Princess Luna, the leader of the aliens that crashed here,” Jonathan Smith then turned to me, pointing to the human from his dream, “Princess Luna, this is my boss, Director Cainn Males.”

        “It is a pleasure to meet you Mr. Cainn Males,” I gave a slight bow.

        “It’s Males or Director,” Cainn Males instructed, “please.”

        His cold nature did not particularly bother me, there were plenty of rulers that displayed such an attitude. Celestia would recommend showing a compassionate side to try to warm them up.  “We appreciate your hospitality and help with the repairs,” I stated.

        “Yes, well we all are very interested in seeing this ship of yours when it is delivered,” Cainn Males responded.

        I of course prefered to meet them on even footing. “Agreed. The sooner our platform is delivered safely back to our hooves the better for everyone involved.”

        “So long as the sun remains in orbit, your platform will be returned,” Cainn Males promised. I thought that a strange turn of phrase, but who was I to question odd sayings?

        “I am starving!” I turned to look at a complaining Double Take as he exited his room, “Whatever that farm was growing was nowhere near ripe.”

        Of all the times for such a comment, this was the worst. I turned back to Cainn Males to explain that we would happily repay the farmer for the food only to find him gone.

        “How… did he just teleport?” I asked looking around. He wasn’t at any of the desks. None of the doors had opened. How did I not feel him teleport out?

        “He might as well have,” Jessica Miller shrugged and sighed, “As for how, he won’t tell us.”

        “Hey! He has told us,” interrupted Thomas Franklin.

        “Yeah. ‘Magic’... right. Why can’t he just say ‘it’s classified’ like everyone else?” Jessica sighed, before sitting down at one of the desks and muttering to herself.

        “Hey! So who wants food?” Jonathan Smith grinned just a bit too wide, “We have lots of fine Earth cuisine right in our kitchen!” 

        Apparently the hallway across from the rooms was a kitchen. Jonathan Smith lead us there as I continued to ponder how Cainn Males could teleport without me noticing it. The kitchen was a small plain room. White walls, white cabinets, and a countertop that was white under all the stains. Two tables were pushed together to make a table that could comfortably sit eight. A fancy stove combined with an oven that I assumed worked off electricity was set into the counter as well as another mechanical marvel that I was unable to identify. 

        “Umm… I probably should have asked this earlier, but what kind of stuff do you guys eat?” Jonathan Smith stole a glance at a large white box that I recognised as a refrigerator. 

        “Fruits, vegetables, and grains mostly. Anything like that will do,” I stated.

        “Alrighty then,” Jonathan Smith maneuvered around the front of the refrigerator, reaching to open it, but never actually pulling on the door, “Um… You guys may want to look away while I get your food out.”

My companions looked puzzled. I, however, had seen the teeth on the humans when they smiled. Quite honestly I was a little surprised they had anything that we would eat readily available. 

        “Why?” Hard Stuff asked. Sometimes I wondered if that stallion had any socal grace whatsoever.





        Jonathan had to stop to think that through. Why couldn’t he show the most likely herbivorous aliens meat? For starters there was the potential for them to freak out. He did not want to have to explain to Director Males why there were four aliens running rampant through the facility. Second was trust. Jonathan knew he wouldn’t trust anything that could eat him, weather it said it would help him or not. The last reason actually had nothing to do with dead animal flesh. Jonathan wasn’t sure if they had gotten around to throwing out those moldy strawberries yet.

        “Well…” Jonathan paused, “We are aliens… our foods may not look terribly appetizing…”

        “Aren’t we going to need to get used to it though?” Quick… Smart? No. Quick Wit inquired.

        As Jonathan tried to figure out how to tactfully explain that there was meat in the refrigerator, the Princess spoke up.

        “We are guests on this planet, if their customs dictate that we do not look at their stored foods, than we shall not,” Princess Luna declared. 

        Though there was no audible grumbling, Jonathan could tell that the aliens were not thrilled to have to follow that command from their ruler. But he silently gave thanks that they were still listening to her as he double checked that they were all still turned around and looking away. Now it was just a matter of deciding between apples and carrots. With a shrug Jonathan just grabbed a bag of both. Jonathan figured that horses ate them so ponies probably could too. He just hoped the look of the food didn’t put his guests off of it before they tried it.

        Turning back around Jonathan closed the door to the fridge and upon hearing the resulting thwump the four creatures turned towards him, worry clearly visible on the unicorn’s face. Until she saw what he was holding anyway.

        “Oh, thank the sun you guys have apples too,” she sighed.

        From the other room Jonathan hear Russ call out something that he was sure would become annoying within two days, “Third Party Aliens!”
> Was This an Accident?
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

        I struggled to find a suitable complement for the provided food. It was not that the food was bad, just lacking. One possible reason was that, as a princess, I was used to eating only the highest quality foods. 

        “These definitely taste different than apples from back home,” Hard Stuff remarked between bites.

        It wasn’t just me that found the taste off then. The next most likely reason was simply that our hosts were carnivores. They wouldn’t know the quality of a food they never ate after all. 

        “Well these are probably quite a bit different from the apples on your planet,” Jonathan Smith shrugged, “I mean, different environments and all that.”

Taking another bite of apple, I pondered this. Different environments producing different types of apples. It seemed strange. Sure there were the zap-apples that grew near the Everfree Forest, but other than that, ponies had to make each of the apple types through magic and selective breeding. Afterall it wasn’t as though apples would change on their own… Though as I kept thinking I realized that apples were rarely grown outside of Equestria. Most other species didn’t have magic and thus could never get apples to grow like an earth pony could. Maybe a part of that was the environment. There was one Zebrican apple orchard that produced a unique tasting cider. This was something I would need to look into after I returned home… On the other hoof perhaps it would be best not to wait.

“Are you saying that apples here change depending on where they are grown?” I asked.

Jonathan Smith looked at me with confusion for a moment, then some realization seemed to set in as he explained, “Well yeah. Everything will slowly change so that it can better survive. If it’s cold the apples that survive best in cold will be able to… well survive and make more seeds than apples that aren’t suited for cold. I know you wouldn’t have spent much time in the fields, but its basic evolution.”

        I nodded. Evolution, I had forgotten about that word. Evolution was the process of random mutations in offspring, a form of chaos. And like all forms of chaos it was dangerous and unpredictable. Luckily thanks to Tia and my guidance nearly every force of chaos had been suppressed or completely stopped and evolution was no longer a threat. Here however, it seemed that such a level of control had not been reached to allow for the removal of such threats. The entire planet now had my sympathy.

        “Ah yes, I apologize. I had assumed that your nation, like ours, was beyond such troubles. You have my condolences,” I picked up a carrot in my magic and looked at it in reverence before eating it. The carrots were bizarrely small. Practically bite sized. It truly was sad what evolution could do to such a wonderful food. 

        “Speaking of your nation, there are some things that I need to ask you about it,” Jonathan Smith stated in a manner that was somber and uncomfortable, “I know that some of this may be uncomfortable for you to answer, but it concerns the safety of this country…No, not just this country, this entire planet. If you would feel more comfortable talking in private we can do so.”

        Jonathan Smith looked over to my companions. I raised an eyebrow. I could not think of anything about Equestria, a land so very far away from this one, that could possibly impact the safety of this planet. The closest thing to a threat to them, besides me, was Discord. Though I doubted he would have any reason to try to find me. I was certain that my absence was causing much more of what he termed ‘fun’ than returning me could possibly produce. Plus it was not like anypony else could prove if he was actually looking or not. 

        “If you truly believe that the contents of my answers should be kept private, I will gladly move to another room,” I conceded before looking across the faces of my companions.

        “It is about the situation leading to your arrival here,” Jonathan Smith explained, “are you sure that you are alright talking about that with them here?”

        “If anything they could provide insights into what happened that I cannot,” I explained.

        Jonathan Smith let out a sigh and nodded, “Very well. First question: what are the chances of your being followed?”

        “None,” I admitted. If another craft was built, a two year project at minimum, then our little ponies would still need to figure out where we were sent. So unless Discord decided it would be fun to have me back or measurements of our pitch were taken just before our teleport, it was safe to say that we would never be followed.

        “If you return to your planet, what response can we expect?”

        “We would be welcomed back, undoubtedly a celebration would be held as ponies would have expected to never see us again,” I stated, “As for your planet, we see trade becoming possible once the flaws in our platform have been addressed... Unless you wish to remain anonymous. I can pretend that I do not know where your planet is located.”

        “Do you truly believe that this was an accident?”

        “Of course it was an accident. What else could it have possibly been? A joke? Not even Discord would try something like this!” I struggled to keep my voice under control. It would not do to shout my host across the room.

        “Well…” Jonathan Smith started, “You were royalty… Wouldn’t it be possible that someone wanted you out of the way? A heir perhaps?” 

        “Are you suggesting that somepony tried to kill Us?” I couldn’t decide if such an idea was laughable or disturbing. Quite possibly it was both. 

        “It might not have been that they were trying to kill you necessarily. But if you’re trapped off planet on a world that no one knows exists…” Jonathan Smith trailed off.

        “There has not been an attempted coup in Our kingdom for over one thousand years,” I argued.

        “Then it sounds like you were overdue,” Jonathan Smith stated.

        “There is no pony that would have the motivation or the ability to plan such a thing!” I rebuked, slamming my hooves into the tiled floor.

        “Look, Luna, Princess, I’m not saying that that’s what happened,” Jonathan Smith, began backing out of the room, “But keep in mind, it is a possibility. Maybe you’re right and it really was an accident. But history tells me that when something goes wrong and the ruler of a country is involved, it usually isn’t. I promise I won’t bring it up again, but please, keep that in mind if you decide to return.”

        With that Jonathan Smith backed out into the main hall. What he had suggested could not be true. The only beings that had any desire to remove me from power were safely locked away in Tartarus. There was that group that had wanted to send ‘Nightmare Moon’ back to the moon, but they steadily declined in membership the longer I continued my dream watching duties and eventually they disbanded. Besides, none of them were allowed to work on the platform and I would have felt magical interference. There were only a hoofful of ponies that worked on the platform; those currently here with me, Celestia, Twilight, those that gathered the necessary resources, and those that helped refine the silicone for the battery. Basically that meant that the only ponies that would have the knowledge of the systems required to sabotage them were Double Take, Quick Wit, Hard Stuff, Celestia, Twilight, and me. 

        I certainly did not do it, leaving me with five suspects. Celestia was so very joyous after I returned from the moon. Additionally this was not her style. If she did have any problems she would want to talk them out, not scheme in secrecy to do away with the troublemaker. 

Twilight rarely did any physical work on the platform. Her major contribution was twofold. First this whole project was sparked by an idle comment of hers. She asked what the moon was like. I told her and somewhere in my explanation I mentioned how I had left some journals and artwork there that I would never see again. “Well theoretically, it is possible to teleport to the moon,” had been her response. From there on most of her work had been computational, outside of the Sparkle Drive. But other than that she never touched any part of the craft. She simply delivered the completed Sparkle Drive to us.

Double Take, Quick Wit, and Hard Stuff were all in the same boat with me. That is to say, they were stuck on this planet too. As such I highly doubted that any of them were responsible. As I looked over them they all seemed as stunned at Jonathan Smith’s suggestion as me, if not more so. I had worked with these ponies for just under two years. I knew none of them were decent actors. Say nothing of the required skill to fool me perfectly. 

        “If I am needed I will be in my room contacting my sister,” I announced. There was an easy way to clear this up, I would simply talk to Tia. She would be able to calm me down. She would explain that understanding was key here. That Jonathan Smith meant well with his suggestion and he was trying to cover all possibilities, no matter how outlandish. And how outlandish that idea was! Celestia and Twilight lacked motive, and anyone with motive lacked the means. That was all there was too it.

        My magic flared as I shut the door behind me. It must have been heavier than I had guessed as it took more power than I thought it would to close it. As such it was not moving at a sufficient speed to produce a satisfying slamming noise. But I was above such petty things as opening a door a second time just to slam it shut. Instead I did what any mature alicorn would do, I cast a quick soundproof spell and started yelling. 

        “The nerve of that stallion! To suggest Tia or Twilight would do such a thing! Kill Us?! What in Tartarus?! Here are two of mine closest friends, one family, the other nearly so, and he thinks that they would try to kill Us!” I shouted. 

        The room was silent after my outburst as the magic soundproofing removed all echo from the room. I was practically panting as I closed my eyes and hopped up onto the bed. I needed to calm down to. Dreamwalking was not terribly hard, but it did require focus, especially at the start. 

        I focused on my breathing. The steady in and out of my breath. That was all there was. In and out. In and out. I pictured each exhale removing my rage and stress. Then, when there was nothing but unfocused calm, I pictured my dream door and stepped through it. The star filled nexus of dreams awaited me, and with a thought I summoned up Tia’s door. At least I tried to. For the second time in two days, I was unable to call upon her dreams.

        The first failure I chalked up to a lack of power. After all, the platform had sucked in all available magic from the surrounding air, it had undoubtedly affected those on board. But a day had passed and I had scarcely used any magic. Even after complete magical burnout my dream walking should have still worked, and indeed it did as my presence in the dream nexus demonstrated. Yet Tia’s door was lost to me. Could it be possible that she wasn’t sleeping? 

        Of course it was. She had watched her sister get shot off into space the previous night, combine that with her royal duties and alicorn stamina and it was no wonder she would not have slept since the incident. If I contacted somepony that could get a message to her quickly I’m sure she could relax enough to finally sleep allowing us to talk. Twilight would be the perfect choice as she had a direct line of communication with Tia through Spike. 

        A brief moment of focus to call upon Twilight’s dream, and… still nothing. 

        “Not to worry,” I told myself, my voice wavering slightly, “She is undoubtedly pouring over the data from the platform’s launch to try to find what went wrong and how to get Us back home.”

        Who would be close enough to Tia that they could alert her, but not loose sleep over my disappearance? Before I could finish asking the question I already had an answer. Blueblood. A quick thought and I would have my least favorite nephew’s dream before me. Except once again, no door appeared. 

        I pondered potential reasons for this problem. Perhaps I had misjudged how long I had been on this planet and it was the middle of the day back in Equestria. I called upon the dreams of our ambassador to the Zebrican homeland with no success. Out of desperation I tried for an old dragon acquaintance of mine that should have still had a few dozen years left before he woke up.  For a moment I feared I would loose my connection to the dreamscape as panic set in. 

        Suddenly it no longer mattered who it was I contacted, just so long as I found a dream from home. I ran through all the servants at the castle, all the guards Lunar and Solar, shopkeepers, those pesky nobles that kept court from ever ending on time, any and all foreign leaders, ponies that I had never met but still knew their names, names that I thought I may have heard mentioned once, and finally I just started adding common names together and hoping for a result. 

        At some point during my mad search I broke down and started crying. I was lost here. I had gotten Quick Wit, Double Take, and Hard Stuff killed on an alien planet. I would wind up living the rest of my life under surveillance from the natives until I simply faded into the background. I would be a living cautionary tale. No one would trust me after I got my crew lost and killed in space.

        Now back in my new bedroom, I looked at myself in the mirror and whispered, “Perhaps We shall remake the Tantabus.” 

        That was when I realized I had gotten into one of my moods and was being irrational. There had to be a reason I could not reach the dreams of my little ponies. Somepony was most certainly blocking me. It probably was not anypony… anyhuman from this planet. After all, I could still access their dreams. If they were going to restrict my dream walking ability, why give me access to their populace but not my own? No, somepony from back home was blocking me. 

        This had the unfortunate implication that somepony back home knew I was off planet and wanted to make sure I did not tell anypony about my survival. Perhaps Jonathan Smith was right. Perhaps somepony had tried to get rid of me. But who? I now knew that they would need to know at least the theory behind dream walking. That narrowed it down to maybe a thousand ponies. A constant casting would be impractical and no pony could do such a thing, not even Tia. An enchantment would be needed. As such a thing had never been done on such a large scale before, the caster would need to either modify an existing enchantment or make their own. This did not narrow it down very much; most ponies that researched dream walking were high level magic users.

        But if I took into account my list from earlier, that left Celestia and Twilight. While neither had a motive to do so, I now knew that it had to be one of them. Celestia had not advanced too far past the basics of dream walking. She could have if she had wanted to, but she prefered talking to a conscious pony to sneaking around in their head. Twilight on the other hoof did not seem to have the natural talent needed for dream walking. She had tried, oh had she tried, but she simply did not have the patience for it. None the less she had rushed ahead and learned all the advanced theory before mastering so much as manipulating her own dreams. Now I understood why.

Now I understood so many things. Like why the Sparkle Drive was not responding. Or why she suggested the trip to the moon in the first place. But it also raised one question that I could not answer.

Why do any of this?
> And What of Everyone Else?
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

For once, Johnathan Smith was smiling while filling out his report. Usually his paperwork was a total bore. At best it was recording what people had thought they’d seen and giving it an inconclusive status. At worst it was reporting a prank call and putting a number on the ‘Do Not Answer’ list. But this time there had been real aliens. Honest to goodness aliens that had crashed on Earth and needed help fixing their ship to return home. One of them was even royalty! Or ex-royalty if they had indeed been banished as he speculated.

John pushed back his chair and ran his hand through his hair as he tried to suppress a smile but instead found it growing wider. After all, this was just like an anime. Colorful and crazy hair? Check; three of the four were pastel colored, and the last one’s hair never stayed still. Bizarre personalities? Check; there was the comedic relief, the one that didn’t care, the banished princess, and the straight man. Superhuman abilities? Check; two of them had wings and they all had access to their advanced, magic-like technology. Non-human characters? Check; one was a pony, one was a unicorn, one was a pegasus, and the last was a thing call an Alicorn. It was incredible! … As long as their fleet didn’t come looking for them and blow up the Earth.







“So you guys actually believe that Luna is a literal god?” Jessica stared across the break room table at Quick Wit, “Not a descendant of a god, not chosen by a god, but an honest to goodness divine being?” 

“Why do you think she isn’t?” Quick Wit asked swallowing the core of the apple she was eating, “She has power over the moon and dreams. Not to mention she’s been alive for well over a thousand years.  I don’t know about you, but that’s enough proof for me.”

“So what? She has a chart for the moon’s phases and locations. Maybe she can predict lunar eclipses. I wouldn’t call that ‘power over the moon’. And dreams? Really? Does that mean she can tell me what my dreams mean? Because anyone that tells you that they can is trying to scam you,” Jessica lectured. 

“No. It means that she can enter and manipulate dreams. Her main job is to stop nightmares,” Quick Wit countered, “And by power over the moon, I mean that she can move it. I mean come on. Don’t tell me your moon just moves on it’s own. Or maybe you all move it with electricity.” 

With a look of concentration she picked up another apple in her telekinesis and made it circle Jessica’s head. With a growl, Jessica snatched the apple out of its orbit.

“And how the hell are you doing that?” Jessica yelled glaring at the offending fruit, “There is no metal in an apple!”

On the other side of the room Double Take and Thomas had gotten fed up with the the argument and stood up to leave.

“Is she always like that?” Double Take asked Thomas.

“Only when I talk to her,” Thomas replied, “Usually she’s pretty quiet.” 

“Yeah same for Witty,” Double Take said with a nod.

The two of them made their way to the semicircle of chairs in the main room. Thomas noted how, much like a dog or cat, Double Take did a little preparatory bend down to jump onto the chair. He found himself trying not to smile at how cute it was. He wound up failing miserably when Double Take spun around twice before laying down.

Double Take tilted his head to the side upon seeing Thomas’s smile and asked, “What?”

“Hm?” Thomas was shaken out of his thoughts, “Oh, um. I just find it fascinating how you’re able to use things designed for much larger creatures.”

“A couch is a couch. As long as it fits my butt, I can sit on it,” Double Take shrugged.

“Yes. Well, of course,” Thomas said, trying to find something else in the room that could capture his attention. He noticed that Russ and Hard Stuff were talking at Russ’s desk. And was Hard Stuff trying to eat a pencil? He wondered exactly what that conversation was about. He couldn’t hear them over Wit and Jessica arguing though. 

Meanwhile Jonathan was still at his desk, back to typing away at the report he had to fill out.

“Heh, real aliens,” He muttered to himself, “This is so awesome.” 







“Luna is gone!?” Gasped Rainbow Dash, “That is so not awesome!”

“We’re doing everything we can to find her,” Twilight assured the other elements of harmony. They had all gathered around the map table in the castle of friendship, with Celestia, Starlight, and Starswirl The Bearded. The last two had books of equations and spell theory laid out across most of the table. Twilight projected an image of the platform angled away to the side of the moon with lines and angles drawn on it  “I recorded the launch and the playback shows us the last observable angel of the platform before they blinked.”

“Darling, I don’t understand. If you have that then don’t you know where they are?” Rarity asked, “Why not just have somepony teleport out to them?”

“Blink, not teleport. And the short answer is distance,” Starlight begin, looking up from the pages scattered about her, “If we had an exact distance and a direction teleportation would theoretically be possible…” Starlight paused to yawn.

“But even then it would be too far away,” Starswirl continued, “Why do you think nopony has tried to teleport to the moon before?”

Pinkie Pie raised a hoof and chimed in, “I thought it was because there was a Nightmare stuck in it.”

“Though I suppose that would be a deterrent, the main reason is that it takes too much magic for anypony to handle to get to the moon,” Starswirl sighed, “The battery on their platform stored more magic in it than any being alive could hope to safely use.”

“Really?” Asked Discord prying himself out of the crystal wall across from Starswirl, “Last I checked I was still alive.” With that he put two fingers of his lion paw to his talon wrist. “Hmm… I appear to be keeping time with Money today...”

“Discord, I’m glad you were able to join us. I assume the explanation as to why you are late is beyond our comprehension?” Celestia inquired, her smile not faltering, her chipper tone unwavering, “After all my Sister only disappeared last night and I am certain it is well within your powers to get her back.”

“Don’t give me that do goody good bullshit, I’m in the high-fidelity first class traveling set,” Discord waved Celestia off as he floated into the air and began to circle the map table, “Besides, Luna is outside my jurisdiction.” 

“Discord” Celestia growled, her horn now alight, “If you are implying that you can not rescue her because she has a title higher than yours…”

“And again you misunderstand me,” Discord sighed, setting his back down on the table, and reaching upwards “I mean that Luna is somewhere I can not reach. There are few places my powers do not work. But she’s in one of the rare gaps that I can’t quite find purchase in.” As he said this his hands slid around and invisible sphere, trying to grab it. “After the fiasco with the changeling hive having an artifact that stopped even my magic, I’ve had to acknowledge that there are things that even I can not affect.” Discord twisted himself upright and met Celestia’s gaze. “I’m late because I traveled as close to where she should be, and while I do not think Luna is dead, I could not feel her magic.”







Quick wit sat alone in the break room, watching an apple that she had placed in the middle of the table. Something was wrong with it. Jessica had left a few minutes ago, tired having different things float around her. It had been a relief for Quick Wit. Towards the end it has been hard to keep things in the air. Everything felt normal when she started, but the longer she levitated anything the heavier it had felt. 

Laughter caused Quick Wit’s ears to twitch. Those in the main room were having fun. Quick Wit was not having fun. Something was wrong. It may have been the apples, it may have been Jessica’s mantra of “magic doesn’t exist”. It may have been that she was stranded on an alien world. Quick Wit wasn’t sure. And that in an of itself bothered her. It felt like she couldn’t put together the pieces. She could always put together the pieces. So why couldn't she do so now? 

It had to be that she didn’t have all the pieces yet.







Johnathan Smith grabbed his report from the printer and slipped it into a manila folder. He may have submitted an electronic copy, but this felt like too big a moment not to hand a physical copy in too. He walked past Thomas and Double Take quoting song lyrics at each other laughing to themselves. John  was glad they were enjoying themselves too. As he swiped his card to exit the Project Gardener wing, he looked over to see Rusty and Hard Stuff comparing alphabets. As the door beeped and opened for him John shook his head at how Hard Stuff was writing with his mouth. It was so unbelievable. All of it was unbelievable. He grinned and shook his head again as he unlocked the second set of doors to their wing. 

Passing through them, John tensed up and gave a little jump. Director Males was in front of him. John figured the Director must have been waiting outside the doors for his report. 

John steadied himself and held out the folder, “My report for you Director Males.”

“Yes. Thank you,” Cainn Males tucked the folder under his arm, “I was hoping to speak to Princess Luna. Is she available?”

“She went into her room a while ago. I suspect she’s sleeping,” John answered, “I’ll tell her you were hoping to speak to her when she wakes up.”

“See that you do,” Cainn Males nodded.

“Yes Sir,” John said, before turning and going back to talk with the real live aliens. 

Cainn Males stroked his goatee while he watched the door to the Project Gardener wing close. “Magic,” he whispered to himself. And when no eyes were upon him, he disappeared.
> Who's Asking The Questions?
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

At some point while pondering why Twilight would exile me from Equestira, I had dozed off. After waking I was informed by Johnathan Smith that Director Males wanted to speak with me. As I do not do my best diplomacy on an empty stomach, I grabbed a sandwich before being lead to a mostly empty room. Inside was a table, two metal chairs, and sitting in one of the chairs Director Cainn Males. I entered and Johnathan Smith closed the door behind me.

The Director stood up and bent his top half in a bow upon seeing me enter, “Princess Luna. I apologize for my earlier rudeness. Your arrival has put a lot on my mind. Feel free to sit if that’s what’s comfortable... Sorry for the uncomfortable chair; couldn’t bring any nicer ones in here without drawing attention.” 

I looked at the chair offered to me. It was almost entirely gray metal. All of the structural support was made out of cylinders. I scooted it out from the table with my magic and found it to be much lighter than I expected. So the legs were hollow then. That would make it cheaper to produce too. On the seat was some manner of puffed up plastic cushion. Hopping into it I confirmed that it was just as comfortable as it looked.

“T’will do fine for our purposes,” I replied, wiggling to try to make the non-existent cushion comfortable. At least the back was angled away from me so my wings were not squished. “I admit. Our introduction did not go the best. I too have been on edge since arriving on your planet.”

“And that is entirely understandable,” Director Males acknowledged, pushing his open hands away from himself, “Let me ensure you, I have every intent of helping you make your platform usable once again. From the information I’ve gathered I highly doubt you all would try to invade Earth. So, on to why I wanted to speak with you; you all need a large amount of pure silicone, correct?”

“Indeed. It must be at least ninety seven percent pure. But the fewer impurities the better,” I replied. I was not thrilled to share secrets of the platform with the humans, but if it got me back to Equestira before Twilight did whatever it was she was planning it would be worth it.

“Purity will not be an issue then,” Director Males assured me, “However We are not sure how to make a four meter tall cylinder of silicon. We’ve never needed to. Have you all developed a technique to meld chunks of pure silicon together?” 

“Hard Stuff understands it far better than I do. You’ll have to get him to help you, but once he has the proper amount of silicon we shall be able to repair our platform.”

“It would be quite helpful to learn such a technique. What with pure silicon’s tendency to flake apart,” Director Males hinted, weaving his fingers together.

Was there harm in showing the Humans the earth pony magic Hard Stuff used to fuse things together? Perhaps. I still had no idea as to how human magic worked. The only one so far that had cast any spells in my presnce was the stallion sitting in front of me, and even he managed to hide his casting. But Hard Stuff’s magic did not have many offensive applications. In addition Hard Stuff would be nearby to undo anything negative the humans did. And if they did try anything I would get a better grasp of how their magic worked. Plus this would be a good small step towards knowledge sharing.

“I doubt Hardstuff would refuse help if it was offered,” I shrugged watching my own reflection in Cainn Males sunglasses.

“Wonderful. This will be a boon for our scientists,” Director Males said with a grin, before his expression soured, “Though if it’s more of your magic I’m not sure we’ll be able to duplicate it.”

“Why would that be?” I doubted he would be foolish enough to give away the answer, but if he brought it up I saw no reason to to ask.

“Well here on Earth there is no magic to speak of. Or at the very least, if there is humans have never learned to harness it.” I noticed my eyes widen slightly in the reflection of his sunglasses. I quickly brought them back under control.

Magic is everywhere, and any creature that did not have any access to it would be at such a disadvantage I doubt they would be able to build a civilization such as yours… Is what I wanted to say. But I held my tongue. There was some trickery to that statement. I could not place my hoof on what it was though. I squirreled the thought away to ruminate on later. 

“Now Equestira, the very name sounds magical. Surely you all have floating castles and armies of knights to protect you from dragons,” Director Males continued.

“Sorry to disappoint, but the logistics of floating castles make them too much of a hassle to maintain. And while dragons do occasionally visit our cities, a recent peace between them and us has meant dragon attacks are almost unheard of now,” I bragged.

“You made peace… with the dragons… You Made Peace… With the Dragons?” Cainn Males repeated.

“Yes we even have a budding alliance in the making thanks to our newest princess,” I confirmed. It was quite the accomplishment of Twilight Sparkle. Though now I had to question if that accomplishment may have had an ulterior motive.
Cainn Males was rubbing his face with his hands. It looked rather awkward to do so around the sunglasses he was still wearing...

“Director Males, would you allow me to indulge my curiosity?”

“Ask away,” he offered, brushing his hair back into place.

“Why do you wear sunglasses where there is no sun?”

Cainn Males took a breath in before replying, “It’s an issue with my eyes. I take no offence to the question. But I’d rather not discuss it.”

“I apologize anyway,” I said with a bow of my head.

There was a faint buzzing noise. Swiveling my ears revealed it to be coming from Director Males. Indeed, he pulled out a small silver device, looked at it for a moment, then put it back into his pants.

“Your platform should be arriving soon. Johnathan will take you back to the others and lead you all to the hanger,” Director Males gestured to the door, and on cue it opened. Johnathan Smith smiling on the other side. As the door shut I did hear one last whisper form Cainn Males.

“Dragons. That changes things,” And then the door shut.







Starswirl the Bearded pushed open the door to Princess Twilight’s lab. There was a slam and a surge of magic. A puff of air rushed into the room throwing the door open and banging it into the wall.

“Starswirl!” Twilight, exclaimed, her ears perked and eyes wide, “Didn’t anypony ever teach you to knock?” Where had Starswirl heard that phrase before?

Starswirl looked around the lab. Other than a surprised alicorn, everything looked normal. Though it didn’t look like Twilight had been doing anything. She was in the middle of the room, no table or chalkboard pulled out from the wall. 

“And why, pray tell, would I need to knock?” Starswirl asked, strolling into the room, “I can’t imagine you of all ponies doing anything illicit in a lab.”

Twilight did not blush or shrink, but rather her coat bristled. “What I do in which rooms of my own castle are none of your business.”

Starswirl chuckled. The way she was acting was like that time through the mirror portal where he’d walked in on a human changing clothes. “You’re right. It isn’t. But that’s not an issue as that’s not why I’m here,” Starswirl said walking past a blank chalkboard and glancing at the notes laid out over a desk next to a brown book with a blue and green sphere on it, “I’ve caught up on all the magical theory that has been written while I was away in hopes of finally looking over your math regarding the sparkle drive.”

Twilight hurried over and pulled the papers on the desk into a pile on top of the book, “You’ve caught up on all of it? Harmony theory? The Message in a Bottle theorem? The Eighteen Arrows Paradox? All of Merlos the Mad’s…”

“Yes. Yes. Yes. And Yes, all of them,” Starswirl interrupted, his eyes leaving the strange bunch of weaving lines on the page Twilight had left on top of the pile, “I understand the nervousness of not wanting anypony to see a spell that may not be working right. As I recall one of them was how you got the way you are…”

Twilight took a deep breath, held it for a moment, then let it out. “You’re right. They’re over here.” Twilight walked over to a stack of papers nearly as tall as her and brushed the dust off of them before levitating them to Starswirl. “I hope this doesn’t keep you busy too long.”

“Oh don’t worry about that. All I seem to have these days is time,” Starswirl assured her, turning to leave. On the way out he felt something crush beneath his rear left hoof. Lifting it and looking back Starswirl saw a piece of chalk, half crushed, that he had stepped on.

“Don’t worry! I’ll clean it up,” Twilight offered with a smile ,“You have lots of reading to get to after all!” 

“Yes. Thanks. Sorry about that,” Starswirl apologized. 

When he was through the door Twilight quickly shut it and there was a rush of magic. Her muffled voice carried through the door saying something about “a line to earth”. Starswirl shook his head. Dirt seemed like a strange thing to study during the current crisis. But if it helped Twilight cope, he wouldn’t hold it against her.