> The Shipping Bar
>  by Spirit Guide
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Let The Shipping Begin
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

The sun was shining brightly that day, a perfect time to be out and about. Better yet, out and about with a really good friend. Where would a pony go with his or her special somepony on a great day like this? What would they want to eat or drink together? These are the questions that led to Twilight Sparkle's opening the Shipping Bar.

The Shipping Bar was something the unicorn had put together after weeks of hard work. With permission from the Mayor and several letters to the Princesses, Twilight had opened the small but cozy establishment to the public. Celestia agreed that it would be helpful for Twilight to learn about romantic friendship and what better way to do so than serve couples a snack? And boy, was it a hit. Since then, Twilight opened the bar once a week, even when the weather was gloomy and ponies were still enjoying time together with friends. There always appeared to be some customers in the bar no matter what it was like outside.

Twilight turned the key in the lock on the double doors of the cafe and pushed them open. With a wave of her horn the curtains swung aside, allowing the bright sunlight to stream into the bar. Chairs were stacked on the tables which were scattered neatly around the room. The light fittings were shiny and elaborate as the day they were made. The multicolored walls were patterned with all manner of symbols and pictures. Twilight smiled. "It's time for another good day running the Shipping Bar," she announced happily.

A dark-blue unicorn poked his through the kitchen doorway. "Yes, it is."

Spirit Guide had been Twilight's special somepony for months now. After meeting him under strange circumstances, Twilight had taken a liking to the studious stallion, finding much in him that she could relate to. Despite his extraordinary, miraculous and sometimes far-fetched-sounding beliefs, Spirit had grown on Twilight and now she could hardly imagine life without him.

Twilight levitated the chairs down and slid them under the tables before heading for the kitchen. Spirit was arranging sets of cutlery and hovering them onto the tables. "Should we expect a larger-than-usual crowd today?" Twilight asked him.

"On Hearts and Hooves Day?" Spirit said incredulously. "Definitely."

Opening the fridge and the cupboards, Twilight began pulling out all kinds of things: fruit, drinks, baked goods, plates and cups. "Then we're going to need to restock."

"Don't worry. I already placed an order yesterday."

Twilight smiled. She loved how organized Spirit was. She pulled out a cutting board and zealously began slicing up apples. "Anypony coming yet?" she inquired.

"Hold on, I'll check." Spirit rushed out of the kitchen, through the bar and out the door. Looking down the road, he saw two ponies approaching, walking side-by-side in a way that could only be described as together. "Wave Ride!" he greeted cheerfully. "So good to see you again."

The arctic-blue earth pony smiled. "Good to see you too Spirit," Wave replied, giving the unicorn a hoof-bump. "Me and Paint were just on our way. Are you open for Hearts and Hooves Day or did we get the date wrong."

"It wouldn't be the first time," Paint Splash giggled.

"Nope, you got it right. Come on in." Spirit led the two ponies into the bar and seated them at a table in the center. He gave them each a menu and went back to the cafe entrance to wait for more couples.

Twilight trotted over to Wave and Paint's table. "May I take your order?" she asked professionally.

Paint smiled sweetly at Wave Ride. "Two apple ciders and a double Meadow Tart," he said, translating his marefriend's sign.

Jotting down the order, Twilight returned to the kitchen and began to prepare it. Meanwhile, Spirit reentered the Shipping Bar accompanied by two more couples. The minute she sat down, Pinkie Pie waved at Paint Splash and shouted a greeting, leaving Cheese Sandwich to reach over for a friendly hoof-shake with Wave. Spike and Rarity found themselves a secluded table in the corner of the cafe and sat down at it, enjoying each other's company and ignoring all else around them.

"First five minutes and already three ships," Spirit chuckled as he pulled out a stash of rubies reserved specially for dragons.

Twilight poured out the cider. "We've become popular. We'd best get ready in case we need to set up more places."

"Don't worry," Spirit reassured her. "I had a canopy installed so we can shade anypony who sits outside."

"You're so clever," Twilight complimented, nuzzling her coltfriend.

Spirit scrunched up his muzzle, not in disgust but rather in playful warning. "Hey hey, let's not us get excited before the customers. Wait till they've gotten into the mood, then we can have some quiet time."

Twilight blushed. "Alright, whatever you say." The two unicorns rushed out of the kitchen and served food and drink to their friends. Paint and Wave were gazing into each others eyes, already taken in by the Shipping Bar. Rarity had Spike in a soft embrace and Pinkie had scooted her chair next to Cheese so they wouldn't have to sit opposite each other.

"So Pinkie," Twilight began as she placed a stack of cupcakes in front of her and Cheese. "How's Party Hall?"

"It's great. Twilight!" Pinkie said, giving Cheese a chance to dive in first. "Me and Cheesie have been throwing parties all month. Ponies keep reserving like there's no tomorrow."

"Probably because we're the best party planners around," Cheese commented, taking the reins of the conversation so Pinkie could have a bite. "And nopony else has party cannons of varying size. But that's enough about of us, how about you Twilight? Learn anything important lately? Uncover a new spell?"

"Funny you should mention that," Twilight said. She looked over at Spirit, indicating that she wanted a break. Spirit winked back at her, informing her that he had it covered. And indeed, the other couples were already happily dining. "Spirit and I found a solution to the multi-special-somepony problem Equestria was facing."

"Really?" the two party ponies exclaimed together.

Twilight nodded. "It was in an old book-"

"It always is!" Pinkie whispered to Cheese.

"-where we found a very interesting spell. It was quite complicated, but me and Spirit? We just saw it as a challenge. We devoted several hours a day to work it out until we finally got it right. Turns out it was a spell made specifically for the Mirror Pool. Or rather, to make a Mirror Pool."

Pinkie frowned worriedly. "But didn't I - I mean, Pinkie - make a big mess when I... Urgh, this situation is sometimes so confusing."

"Honestly, I'm not so used to it myself," Spirit admitted quietly."

"Use whatever's easier for you, Pinkie," Twilight told her. "After all, you're about as close to another Pinkie as we'll see."

Pinkie beamed. "Great! So where was I? Oh yeah. Didn't I make a big mess when I used the Mirror Pool in the Everfree Forest and accidentally made hundreds of fun-loving clones of myself, each one with the same adorable mane, tail and hooves, who then went out and ruined Ponyville and you had to give us a test to see which one of us could watch paint dry for the longest and sent all the clones back to the pool and sealed it up so nopony would ever use it again?"

"You did make a big mess back then, it's true," Twilight said gently so as not to hurt Pinkie's feelings, "but this spell described the Mirror Pool that could be created with it as highly accurate. Meaning that whoever was cloned through it, the clone would be exactly like them. When you used the Everfree Mirror Pool, you were focused on being able to have fun whenever it was being done anywhere Ponyville, so your clones were only interested in that. If a pony were to enter through the Mirror Pool we created, the clones would be just like them, sharing thoughts, mannerisms, appearances, even feelings."

"Oooooh," Cheese and Pinkie uttered in unison.

A knock at the cafe door attracted their attention. "Twily!" Spirit called from the kitchen. "Can you get that? I've got my horn and hooves full of chocolate hayburgers!"

Somepony actually ordered that? Twilight thought in disbelief. That particular item had originally been placed on the menu as a joke, but grew surprisingly popular for some reason, mainly among foals. Twilight enjoyed seeing young pairs sitting in the cafe. She walked to the door, opened it and found two ponies waiting out front: a green pegasus stallion with a mane colored like a lollipop and.... Pinkie Pie.

"Welcome to the Shipping Bar," Twilight greeted, not batting an eyelid.

The pegasus bit his lip and grinned nervously. "Eh, hi. We um... we would like to...."

"Come on, Cotton Pop," the pink pony next to him said. "Let's grab a bite to eat."

"Whatever you say Pinkie," Cotton said, sounding a bit at ease.

Twilight led the new ship into the bar and seated them at a table near the party planners. The moment she saw herself, Pinkie leaned over the chair for a hug, which Pinkie happily returned. Cheese waved in a friendly manner at Cotton Pop, who's face split into a jolly smile.

Spirit, his hair matted with hay and his face splotched with chocolate, stepped out of the kitchen, bearing a tray of cocoa-brown hayburgers which he placed between Wave Ride and Paint Splash. "And I hope your happy," he grunted sarcastically.

"Yes, we are," Wave said, trying not to laugh.

"Right." Spirit welcomed Cotton and Pinkie. "Might I suggest our morning cupcakes? We have chocolate, strawberry, blueberry, apple, green apple, Zap apple, golden delici-"

"No we don't!" Twilight called from the kitchen.

"-oats, lemon surprise, banana, daisy, sugar, sugarcube, frosting, marzipan, ChimiCherryChanga, sapphire, confetti, rock, Poison Joke, spaghetti, wubs and fire," Spirit finished.

Cotton's mouth fell open like a loose drawer. "You told me they had good stuff but you didn't mention how much of it," he said, staring accusingly across the table at Pinkie.

"You won't like anything unless you try it," Pinkie told him. Then to Spirit, she said, "Three of each so that Cotton can taste everything, please!"

"TRIPLE CUPCAKE SEASON OVERRIDE!" Spirit roared across the bar.

Twilight wheeled an indoor catapult (which is like a normal catapult, except indoors) out of the kitchen and loaded the arm-bowl with variously-colored-and-decorated cupcakes. "ARMED AND READY!" Twilight reported.

"FIRE AT WILL!"

The catapult rolled backwards from the force of its swinging arm as it sent the cupcakes flying through the air towards the table. Cotton shielded his head with his wings, Pinkie leaned back with her mouth open and Spirit pulled out a huge tray, upon which every cupcake (except for one, which Pinkie caught) landed on it in a neat stack.

Spirit placed the towering order gently on the table. "Enjoy," he said politely, and headed back to the kitchen.

Cotton gaped at the mountain of baked goods now separating him and his marefriend. When he finally got over his shock, he waved towards her and Pinkie slid her chair across the floor to join him. "I told you that you'd like this place," she teased.

"And you were right again. Let's eat."

No further invitation was required. The two ponies dug in to their food, equally matched when it came to scarfing.

"New arrivals?" Twilight wondered.

"More like 'new ship'," Spirit corrected. "I've never seen these two around, considering it's the real Pinkie."

"Hearts and Hooves Day must have guided them to the Bar." Twilight tapped her chin thoughtfully. "Do you think he's from the-"

"Without a doubt. His mannerisms are different, enough so that you could judge by them."

Before Twilight could further address the briefly-mentioned topic, two very familiar ponies stepped into the cafe: Applejack and Rainbow Dash, walking so close to one another that they were like one pony. The two unicorns saw that both mares were clones of their friends.

"Hey guys!" Rainbow called across the room.

"Welcome girls," Spirit replied. A strange side effect to the new Mirror Pool clones was the unearthing of new feelings. Some clones would gravitate towards ponies in a way that the originals normally wouldn't. The results were often surprising but, just like the others, perfectly respectable and oddly satisfying. "Come on in and get a snack."

Applejack and Rainbow Dash took a seat next to Spike and Rarity's table, enabling them to exchange words without shouting. While Twilight went to take their order, Spirit went outside again. The Shipping Bar was already buzzing with activity and it had barely been open for half an hour. As he glanced up and down the street for more visitors, the sky grew dark as clouds rolled in front of the sun and blocked out the previously bright light. The shadows grew thicker further down the road and two ponies stepped out of the darkness. One was clearly Luna, the alicorn Princess of the Night, but the other pony was a bit surprising. And not just because he was an alicorn stallion.

Spirit watched the godlike couple canter down the road towards the cafe. They stopped in front of him and Luna said, "Greetings, Spirit Guide."

Seeing right through the clone's accurateness, Spirit bowed his head as he did when meeting friends. "Welcome, Princess Luna." He looked over at the alicorn beside her. He was quite the sight indeed. His coat was a fierce red and his mane was yellow streaked with dark stripes. His tail was a rare red-and-black and his right eye was nothing but brilliant amaranth. His regalia included a dark-blue chest plate with a blood-red moon on it and sinisterly-designed iron shoes. His appearance, while frightening, gave off a sense of slight confusion but also great talent that was missed by most, but not by Spirit's eyes. "Who's your friend?" he asked curiously.

The alicorn stallion lifted a hoof from its shoe and held it out. "I'm Crimson Shadow," he said in a surprisingly young voice. "Nice to meet you, Spirit."

Spirit accepted Crimson's hoof. "And you. I've never seen you around before, Crimson," Spirit went on. "I guess that means you're-"

"It certainly does." Crimson cut him off. "But enough about that. I heard you were one of the owners of a certain restaurant we've been hearing so much about. We came to see it for ourselves on this splendid day. Have you got reservations that would prevent that?"

"Pfft, reservations," Spirit scoffed. "Believe me, if we took reservations, we'd need a bigger cafe."

"Yes, I suppose that sounds right." Shadow looked up at the bright cafe and smiled. "So have you got room for a modest pair of alicorns?"

Spirit turned. "Yep. Come right on in. You made it in good time."

Crimson and Luna followed Spirit into the cafe and, after getting absolutely no strange looks from the other ships who were keeping to themselves, sat down at a table. Twilight came out with two menus. "You just choose what you like and we'll do our best," she told the alicorns.

Leaving them to decide on their meal, Spirit and Twilight returned to the door. "Well, that was unexpected," Spirit said casually, leaning against the door frame.

"What?" Twilight inquired. "A male alicorn with the most abnormal color scheme you ever saw?"

Spirit smiled. "No color scheme is too crazy," he replied. "Although I have yet to see another male alicorn in order to be as surprised as you."

A tremor shook the ground beneath them as a loud whirring sound filled their ears. Across the road a blue phone booth appeared out of thin air. The door opened and an earth pony stepped out of the booth, sporting a red fez on his head and a red bow-tie around his neck. "Eh nope, this is the right place," he said in a British accent. "I told you we'd be back in time for Hearts and Hooves Day."

Spirit and Twilight both knew this one. It was one of the Doctor Whooves Mirror Pool clones. Each one had appeared with their own TARDIS, the strange phone booth they used to travel through time with, and tended to have a different dressing style.

A pegasus poked her head out beside the Doctor. Her coat was a moderate gold and her mane was two-toned with blue and strong gold. She wore a watch on her left front hoof and a red fez of her own on her head, with two small antlers poking out of her mane on either side. Her cutie mark was three gears colored grey, green and pink.

"Yeah right," the pegasus scoffed, grinning while looking about. "You probably made the TARDIE so tired, she took us right to the place."

"Oh, ponyfeathers," the Doctor exclaimed. He climbed out of the TARDIE and gently patted the blue metal. "She doesn't mean that, sweetheart," he crooned to the machine. "She's just a little haywire from the trip."

"You'll be wired with hay when I'm through with you," the pegasus laughed. Then she saw Twilight and Spirit. "Well, what do you know? Hey Doctor, I think we're in the right place and the right time."

"Oh good, I'm looking forward to some buttered muffins." The Doctor stepped away from the TARDIE and trotted up alongside the pegasus. "Hallo!"

"Good morning, Doctor," Twilight said. "Had a nice flight?"

"Oh, well, flying through the dimensions is quite all right. Of course, it would be a lot easier to fly the TARDIS if Broken Gears here could control that stomach of hers."

"Hey!" Broken Gears yelled. "Yours wasn't exactly quiet as a mouse either!" As they spoke, both their stomachs growled.

"Okay you two, get inside," Spirit told them. Broken Gears and the Doctor exchanged grins and zoomed inside.

“Well, that was a nice twist on the last entrance,” he commented. But when Spirit turned to await Twilight’s response, he found her smiling gleefully. “What?”

Twilight waved a hoof at Broken Gears, who had seated herself with the Doctor next to Luna and Crimson. "Broke Gears," Twilight said quietly. "Wings, antlers, exceptional coloration, interesting taste in accessories..."

"She's not an alicorn!" Spirit objected. "And besides, we..." He stopped arguing when he saw the hopeful look on Twilight's face. "Horseshoes," he swore, giving in. "What do I owe you this time?"

Twilight wrapped her hooves around his neck. "A nice long cuddle when the day is over," she told him sweetly. The frown melted off Spirit's muzzle like chocolate on a fresh pie. "So that it's not a bad thing for you."

"Hmm, thank you." Spirit hugged Twilight back. When they separated, Spirit said, "I'll go park their TARDIS round the back. You'd better go take their order, and expect a cup of tea."

Twilight giggled. "Don't worry. I haven't forgotten the last time." Spirit went to take care of the large blue box and Twilight reentered the Bar. She took an order of tea, butter, eggs, hayfries and English muffins from the Doctor and Broken Gears, and went to the kitchen. While preparing the order, she looked out at the ponies(and the dragon) sitting in pairs, enjoying the food and each others company. It warmed her heart to see them all happy, just taking pleasure from being with the one they loved most. She and Spirit had worked together to make the Shipping Bar the perfect place for couples and they had done just that. Twilight wondered what other things they could do together.

BAM! The back door burst open, revealing Spirit levitating several crates precariously balanced one on top of the other. "Hey Twi," he called across the kitchen. "Could do with a little extra magic here."

Smiling, Twilight walked over to her coltfriend's side and added her own lavender magic aura under the crates. "What would you do without me, Spirit?" she asked.

"Locked up in my room with all my books, writing love letters to nopony," he replied promptly, gently dropping the crates on the floor. "And that's the last thing either of us wants to end up doing." He leaned in and stuck his head into the top crate, calling out as he tossed things out onto the counter. "More flour, more sweets, more eggs, more apples and, oh look, more everything else." He pulled his head out and smiled awkwardly. "Well, what a surprise. Exactly what we ordered."

"And it was a pleasure to bring it to you," came a voice from the doorway. Twilight and Spirit spun around to find two ponies framed in the back entrance: a light-grey pegasus mare with flowing dark hair and a grey unicorn stallion with a black mane.

"Sweet Blasphemy!" Twilight cried out happily, throwing herself at the pegasus.

Spirit greeted the stallion with a friendly hoof-bump and a quick hug. "Great to see you again, Dregon."

"Likewise," Dregon said.

Sweet Blasphemy and Twilight got up from their embrace. "Me and Dregon were wandering around town, browsing," Sweet Blasphemy informed. "You know, what with Hearts and Hooves Day happening and all, and we saw several ponies in the marketplace loading up some crates. Curious as we are, we asked them who it was for. When we heard it was due for the Shipping Bar, we offered to bring it over and drop in at the same time."

"Better than dropping in," Twilight said, "why don't you come sit down and have some food? Our menu has grown since the last time you came by."

Dregon and Sweet Blasphemy smiled warmly, as they always did when their thoughts were in sync. "You know what?" Dregon declared. "Why not?"

Spirit directed the lively pair into the dining room, where they were greeted by all the other couples. Once they'd sat down, Spirit returned to the kitchen. "That was nice of SB and Dregon," he said to Twilight. "Having friends is a blessing to us all."

Twilight laughed and nuzzled him. "Come on. Let's get this stuff organized. We've got a whole day of treating to do and I don't want to fall behind on orders anymore than I'd want to fall behind on my studies."

"Same here," Spirit agreed. "Let's tidy up."
> Shipmaker, Shipmaker, ship me with somepony
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

"The food's great, Spirit. As usual"

"Thanks, Sweet Treat. It was a combined effort."

The pink mare nodded. "What good things aren't?"

Spirit looked around. The heat of Hearts and Hooves Day had chased ponies out of their homes and led them to the Shipping Bar. Half of the interior was already filled with happily feasting couples. Spike and Rarity had gone back to the boutique, but promised Spirit and Twilight they would return later, as had Applejack and Rainbow Dash. Wave Ride and Paint Splash hadn’t moved an inch and were quite happy with that. Broken Gears and the Doctor had scooted over to a window seat. Cheese Sandwich, Cotton Pop and the two Pinkie Pies and taken tables outside to let the newcomers enjoy the indoor service first. Crimson Shadow had moved with Luna to the second floor, a balcony ringing the upper level of the Shipping Bar, accessible via a staircase in the corner. 

At that moment, Twilight was serving a garden salad to Applejack and Rarity, while hovering a large wobbling jelly up to Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash on the second floor. Scattered around the Bar were similarly surprising and unexpected pairings, but nobody was making a fuss. Everyone was accepted.

“Everything gets better when done together,” Spirit concluded.

“Sure does,” Sweet Treat agreed.

Leaf Turner, Sweet Treat’s marefriend, lifted her face from her helping of Zap apple fruit salad. “Everything going all right with Twilight?” she asked, her mouth stained from the multicolored apples.

“Leaf!” Sweet Treat scolded, but Spirit waved her down.

“It’s okay, Sweet,” he announced. “It’s Hearts and Hooves Day.” Turning to Leaf Turner, Spirit replied, “Just fine, Leaf. Our studies are coming along fine, even better since we combined our efforts. Especially for spellwork.”

On the next table, Sunset Love and Black Canvas had overheard. “I take it that some harder spells are easier to cast when you pool your magic?” Black Canvas guessed, fluttering her wings so that her rainbow-colored mane floated.

“Aboslutely.”

Leaf Turner looked around shyly. “I don’t suppose you would mind talking to us for a few minutes?”

“Well, I don’t know,” Spirit replied honestly. “I don’t want Twilight to be put-upon. That won’t end well.”

Sweet and Leaf exchanged glances with Black and Sunset. “Yeah, you’re right. Talk to you later then?”

“Maybe.”

“It’s just that we need, I mean, we’d like to know a bit more about….. that.”

Sunset Love’s eyes went wide. “It was so confusing,” she muttered dreamily, “yet the proof is all around us. Do you know more about it?”

Spirit stared at Sweet Treat, his mouth a straight line. He turned around and found Black Canvas holding Sunset’s hoof comfortingly. “Don’t worry, everypony. Soon enough, one way or another, you'll get your answers.”

The four mares sighed in relief. “Glad to know,” Sweet Treat said.

“I’m gonna enjoy hearing when you’re ready,” Black said eagerly. Sunset nodded in agreement

“We trust you, Spirit,” Leaf Turner added.

“Glad to hear. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’d better go take a share of the work.” Spirit left the table and hurried to the kitchen, where Sweet Blasphemy, despite Twilight and Spirit’s polite objections, was mixing punch in a large glass bowl. “So what did we miss?” Twilight asked when she saw him.

“Eh, some of the ponies wanted to talk about the event,” Spirit answered, picking up a tray of cupcakes and sliding them into the oven to bake. He then pulled out a tub of chocolate glaze and started spreading them on the donuts. “I told them we’d talk about it later.”

“You’re so dependable,” Twilight complimented. “We all know you keep your promises.”

“I just hope what we have is satisfactory for them,” the dark blue unicorn replied. He shook sprinkles onto the donuts. “There, that should satisfy some of our customers.”

Sweet Blasphemy looked over. “They’re lovely!”

Twilight sniffed. “And they smell brilliant too.”

“No doubt they taste amazing,” Spirit added. “Thanks to you.”

“Oh, stop it,” Twilight said, giving him a light push. She floated the donuts off their tray and onto a platter. “I’ve got several ships wanting donuts. I’ll go give them out. You can take care of the cupcakes and finish the punch. You might want to mix up more batter, though.”

“More?” Spirit repeated. Then he shrugged. “What the hay, let’s do this.”

Twilight couldn’t help but chuckle as she left the kitchen, bearing the donuts on her back. She weaved through the tables, dropping baked goods on the tables of those who ordered. When she reached the door, the tray was empty and half the couples were munching away.

A loud noise caught Twilight’s attention and she looked up. Flying in the sky were nine pegasi, one she recognized as Spitfire, Captain of the Wonderbolts. What are the Wonderbolts doing here? Twilight wondered.

The answer came quickly as one pegasus did a loop-the-loop, high-hoofed Spitfire and streaked towards the ground, pulling up and landing firmly on his hooves. Twilight recognized Soarin, one of the male Wonderbolts and a big fan of pies.

“See you tomorrow, Soarin!” one of the flying pegasi called down at him. But Twilight was surprised that the speaking pony was Soarin. She looked down at the Pegasus who’d just landed. He must be a Mirror Pool clone, she deduced.

“Bye!” the Soarin on the ground shouted at his comrades. The eight pegasi veered and flew off towards Cloudsdale. Now that Twilight was paying attention, she saw clearly that this was the real Soarin. But what really bothered her was that the pegasus was alone. And he knew it. The minute the Wonderbolts were out of sight, Soarin circled a patch of grass under a tree and sat down, looking depressed.

Why did he leave his friends to be by himself on Hearts and Hooves Day? Twilight found herself wondering as she turned to go inside. While facing the road, she noticed four figures approaching the Shipping Bar:  Fluttershy, Discord, Sweetie Belle and Button Mash.

“Hello everyone,” she greeted.

“Good afternoon, Twilight,” Discord replied, flourishing his claw in a way that made Twilight uneasy. She heard a shout from the back of the café and turned to see Derpy Hooves hurrying away from the TARDIS parking. The Doctor, the real Doctor, followed shortly, galloping back and forth as his TARDIS zoomed up and down, slamming into the ground inches away from wherever the stallion was.

“Doctor, make it stop!” Derpy begged.

“I didn’t do this!” the Doctor declared as he dodged the wild TARDIS again.

Twilight turned. “Come on, Discord. I thought you were above this kind of thing.”

“Oh, do lighten up, Twilight Sparkle,” Discord insisted. “It won’t land on him…. Maybe.”

“Now, Discord,” Fluttershy said gently. Twilight was glad to see that it was the real Fluttershy. “You know better than to pick on the Doctor.”

Discord considered this for a moment, just long enough for Derpy to accidentally fly into him. With the wall-eyed mare perched on his head, he had to sigh. “You’re right, Fluttershy.” He snapped his tail and the TARDIS stopped in mid-air, shivered, and then floated back to the café.

The Doctor was on the Lord of Chaos immediately. “Do you have any idea what messing with my TARDIS’s systems could do?” he demanded.

“Create a black hole the size of Belgium?” Discord offered.

“Not exactly,” Derpy said, climbing off Discord’s head. “Sorry about that.”

“Have no fear, Doctor,” Twilight comforted the Time Lord. “Spirit’s studied Discord’s chaos magic. It can’t passively damage the TARDIS.”

The Doctor looked relived. “Well, that’s good to know. We’ve only just arrived for Hearts and Hooves Day and we hope to have a meal at the Shipping Bar. Do you think we could?”

“Sure.” Twilight waved towards the café interior. “Spirit should be there to take your order.”

The Doctor beamed. "Oh, this is just terrific. Allons-y, Derpy!"

“Yay, muffins!” Derpy cried happily.

“With butter! And tea, and eggs-“

“No pears!”

Twilight watched the two ponies enter the café and spun around to face the other newcomers. Fluttershy was patting Discord’s back and the draconequus was scratching his head unsurely. Button Mash had pulled out his joyboy and was mashing away at the buttons. Sweetie Belle just stood beside them, grinning uncertainly. "That was interesting," she noted. "Right, Button?"

Button looked up from his game. “Huh, wha?" 

“Okay, you two,” Twilight said, taking the hint that they wanted to move on. “Go in and get a milkshake; take the table by the kitchen.”

“Alright!” the school-age couple cheered, rushing past the purple unicorn.

Fluttershy smiled. “Young love. It’s as strong as any.”

“Quite so,” Discord said. “And now Twilight. Do you think there’ll be a problem with me and Fluttershy having a bite?”

Twilight looked up at the draconequus. If he wanted, she imagined he could hide the fact that he was a Mirror Pool clone, but Twilight was quite sure that it was the real Discord. Not that it made her feel any better or any worse. “No, it should be fine. Just… would you mind sitting on the second floor?”

“Hmm,” Discord mused, tapping his chin and both his knees while he thought. “What do you think, Fluttershy?”

“Oh, I really don’t mind, Discord,” the yellow pegasus admitted, beginning to blush.

“Alright then Twilight, we’ll seat ourselves upstairs.” Gently throwing an arm around Fluttershy, Discord snapped his claw and the two disappeared. At once, Twilight heard a shriek from the café and Discord calling out, “Barkeep!”

"Oh Discord," she laughed to herself. "You’ve changed so much." She looked back at Soarin, sitting under the tree. He really did look lonely. “Rainbow Dash would know what to do,” Twilight said aloud, knowing her friend's connections with the Wonderbolts. “She knows him as well as any of us.”

“NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWW!”

“Gah!” The sudden sweep of guitar strings frightened Twilight so much, she jumped and fired a beam from her horn, which exploded in the air like fireworks.

A white unicorn stallion on the side of the road chuckled lightly, tapping the soundboard of his guitar. “I didn’t think that would work, Muse,” he said to the red pegasus beside him.

“You really shouldn’t have done that, Riff,” the pegasus scolded him. “It’s not April Foals’ Day.” She bent down and helped Twilight up. “I hope you’re not hurt, Twilight.”

“No, I’m alright. Just a little startled.” Twilight recognized the ponies. They were both musically talented. Riff was an exceptional guitarist and Muse knew every musician, band and song in Equestria. They were a perfect match.

“Sorry, Twi,” Riff apologized. “It was a bit too tempting for me to resist, an inconspicuous pony right in front of me.” He peered unsurely at Twilight. “Maybe there’s something I can do to help?”

“No thanks, I’m good Riff. Really, I am.” Twilight’s gaze wandered again to Soarin. Sadness crept into her heart as she watched him paw at the ground. Nopony should be alone or sad on Hearts and Hooves Day, she thought to herself. “Actually Riff, there might be something you can do.”

“Oh, please tell me Twilight!” Riff requested, bouncing up and down beside Muse. “I want to help, I do!”

“I need you to go to the Crystal Empire and invite my brother Prince Shining Armor and my sister-in-law Princess Cadance to the Shipping Bar, and bring them here.”

Riff’s face fell. “The Crystal Empire? That’s kind of far away.”

“There must be a way we can get their quickly,” Muse speculated.

The ponies hear another whirring sound and a new TARDIS appeared beside them. This time, a Twilight Sparkle clone and a Doctor wearing a blue suit and red tie stepped out. “There must be a reason for the TARDIS bringing us here of all places, Doctor,” the other Twilight said, looking about.

The Doctor looked up at the Shipping Bar. “Oh, is it Hearts and Hooves Day?” he wondered. “Lovely.”

Twilight, Muse and Riff approached the new arrivals. Things escalated smoothly from there. They explained their predicament to the Twilight clone and the Doctor and the two time travelers agreed to take Muse and Riff to the Crystal Empire and back, including the Prince and Princess. After they’d whirred off in the TARDIS, Twilight glanced once more at Soarin before turning to go back inside.

Spirit was on her at once. “Thank Luna, you’re back. Discord’s being silly. He keeps ordering glasses of water and making it chocolate rain into them.”

“That doesn’t sound so bad,” Twilight commented.

“Yeah,” Spirit agreed. “Until he tips the glasses over the balcony onto the couples below. Good thing there were Pinkie Pies on the nearby tables.”

Twilight laughed so hard she had to put a hoof on Spirit’s shoulder for support. “Hey, it wasn’t that funny,” Spirit said defensively.

“Spirit, we need more cider over here!” Dregon called from the other side of the Bar. He too stubbornly insisted on helping serve the ships.

“I’ll take care of it,” Twilight said to Spirit. Then she told him about Soarin, Riff and Muse, the time travelers and her idea.

After she’d finished, Spirit nodded. “Good thinking. Cadance will probably know something that could help. And even if she doesn’t, it’ll be nice to see her and Shining again”

Twilight kissed Spirit on the cheek. “I hope it all works out.” And with that, she rushed off to the kitchen.

Spirit stepped outside and looked at Soarin from the doorway. He really did look sad and lonely, just like Twilight had said. The normally energetic pegasus just didn’t look right sitting by himself. While he waited for the TARDIS to return, Spirit sat down at one of the outdoor tables.

Presently, another couple came down the road. They were actually flying, both being pegasi, and were chasing after a knot of giggling colts, who were carrying what was probably stolen goodies between them. The older ponies looked angry.

“You bring that back right now!” the stallion shouted.

“We’ll tell your parents!” the mare yelled.

These two were Bulletproof Love and Vapour Wisp. A recently married couple from the event, they’d quickly found their place together in ultimate friendship. And now they were chasing after kids.

“Come and catch us, lovebirds!” one of the colts called pompously over his shoulder. The other foals laughed, looking back at the pursuing couple. They were so youthfully giddy with laughter they didn’t even notice Spirit pinch the load off their backs and top them with substantial illusions he created with his magic. The colts ran right past the Shipping Bar, around the corner and out of sight.

“You’d think that they’d expect something like that from a passer-by,” Spirit muttered.

Bulletproof and Vapour came to a stop at the Bar. “Oh man, thanks a bunch Spirit,” Bulletproof said gratefully. “We caught those boys raiding an open stall while the owner was talking to her friends.”

“We said we get them back for her and return them as soon as possible,” Vapour continued in between breaths. “Uh. Chasing after foals isn’t as fun as it sounds.”

“And now we need to go back with the goods.” Bulletproof extended his wings. “We’ll probably have to walk there.”

“Don’t leave yet,” Spirit asked of the exhausted pegasi. “It’s Hearts and Hooves Day. Stay for a snack.”

“We couldn’t,” Vapour apologized. “We need to get these things back to their owner before she starts to worry more.”

Dregon teleported into the empty seat next to Spirit. “Sounds like you’ve a job and I’m going to take it,” the grey unicorn said. “You two will stay here and enjoy Hearts and Hooves Day to its fullest.”

“Dregon, buddy, you really don’t-“ Bulletproof started to say.

“Nooooo,” Dregon uttered, giving the two pegasi a little push inside. "You go enjoy some donuts. Cupcakes, tarts, punch, whatever. And don’t you dare worry about the stuff getting back safely!” he added when they turned around to object.

Spirit grinned. “Nice work, Cupid,” he joked.

“It was too easy,” Dregon admitted, levitating the stolen goods onto his back. “See you soon.” In a flash of light, he teleported away.

Still smiling, Spirit turned his head to see how the outdoor couples were doing. Cotton Pop and Cheese had struck up a conversation with Trixie Lulamoon and Maud Pie over various types of entertainment, while the two Pinkie Pies with them had seen something far more engaging.

“Ooooh, look who’s coming!”

Being the calm and collected pony he was, Spirit gullibly glanced up the road.  He was astonished, however, to find two gryphons walking towards the establishment. Two gryphons that looked familiar. “Excuse me,” he said politely. “I don’t mean to intrude, but have I seen you before?”

The male gryphon looked surprised. “Don't you recognize us?”

“Hush, dear,” the female gryphon said peacefully. “It’s been a while and we haven’t exactly checked on him ourselves." Then she addressed Spirit. “We’re also here because of what happened.”

Spirit clopped his hooves together. “Oh, now I remember. Galileo and Auxesia. You two were very much missed during the first few gatherings.”

“We found our schedules rather full,” Galileo admitted. “We never found the time to visit.”

“Well, let’s remedy that,” Twilight declared, walking through the door with Sweet Blasphemy close behind. “SB, please take our friends inside and get them a nice meal.”

“Absolutely,” Sweet Blasphemy complied. She led the two gryphons inside, asking them about their preferred beverages.

“Have they returned yet?” Twilight whispered to Spirit, sounding more concerned than before.

“Not yet,” Spirit replied morosely. The two unicorns watched Soarin from a distance, observing the lonely stallion’s actions. Soarin looked so somber that if he had a guitar, he could probably compose the most touching tune ever.

“This is really beginning to hurt,” Twilight mumbled, putting her head on her coltfriend’s shoulder.

Spirit picked up Twilight’s hoof and squeezed it reassuringly. “There’s nothing we can do but wait. They will come.”

And at that moment, the TARDIS reappeared in the exact same spot it arrived in. Riff and Muse poked their heads out and looked around. “We made it!” they cheered, stepping out of the TARDIS.

The suited Doctor was the next one out, closely followed by his assistant Twilight. “Well, we said we’d be back and I’d say we did just that,” the Doctor said, pushing the TARDIS door open.

Standing just inside the time-traveling vehicle, regal-looking as ever, were Prince Shining Armor and Princess Cadance. Both had gone without their regalia for the trip and looked just about as ordinary as two rulers could.

“Twily!” Shining Armor whooped, pulling his sister in for a hug. “I’ve missed you, little sis!”

“Me too, Shiny.”

Cadance approached Twilight and Shining stepped back. The two mares preformed their chant.

Sunshine, sunshine,
ladybugs awake!
Clap your hooves
and do a little shake!

Shining and Spirit beamed at their marefriends. “Riff and Muse told us what was going on,” Shining told him. “ We came here as fast as we could.”

“Your speed is appreciated.”

“I’ll say it is.” Dregon reappeared beside the motley group, speaking as though he’d been there the whole time. “Spirit, the goods were returned and the owner is happy.”

“Thanks, Dregon. You’re a great friend.”

“Hmm. Okay folks!” he shouted, his hooves connecting with a loud clop. “Riff, Muse, Twilight, Doctor. Everypony in!”

“YAY!” The four ponies rushed past the grey unicorn, almost trampling him. Both royalty and magic students chuckled as their friend dusted himself off. “Should’ve expected that,” Dregon admitted, rushing in after them to help his marefriend.

“If that’s what happens at work for you, I wanna get a job here,” Shining said eagerly.

“Maybe next time, Shining,” Spirit told the bigger stallion. “But right now, we’ve got a special-somepony crisis.”

“A pony all alone on Hearts and Hooves Day,” Cadance stated sorrowfully. “I never thought I’d come across such a situation.”

“Can you do anything about it, Cadance?” Twilight asked her old foalsitter.

Cadance looked at Shining Armor, who frowned unsurely. “That’s not really how my magic works, Twilight. It’s made for existing couples and ponies who are seeking love. Soarin is just alone. He’s not trying to look for a way out.”

This piece of information made Twilight and Spirit even sadder. If Soarin wasn’t interested in escaping his seclusion, Cadance wouldn’t be able to help him. The Shipping Bar aside, she and Shining Armor had come all this way for nothing.

“I’m so sorry, Twily,” Shining apologized. Cadance looked distraught

Twilight put her head on Spirit’s shoulder and sobbed earnestly. Spirit felt tears forming in his eyes too. In one moment, Hearts and Hooves Day had lost all its magic. After everything he and Twilight had done that day, after everyone they’d met and served, they still couldn’t save one pony from self-seclusion.

Suddenly, Cadance said, “Who’s that?”

Twilight and Spirit perked up and turned to see who she was talking about. Up in the sky, bucking a cloud into shape, was a bright-red pegasus mare with a dark-grey mane. Her cutie mark was a game controller.

“I know who that is!” Twilight said. “She’s Cutie Control, a game-playing master. She managed to knock out Button Mash in every game they’ve played in.”

“Strange,” Spirit murmured. “She’s on her own too.”

“Is it some sort of Ponyville tradition, being alone on Hearts and Hooves Day?” Shining wondered.

“Shining!” the other three ponies scolded him, although they knew he was kidding. Still, Shining Armor had a point.

“Ooh!” Twilight exclaimed. “Maybe Cutie can help us!”

Spirit looked at her. “Hmm?”

“If Cutie Control is by herself,” Twilight reasoned, lifting up a hoof, “and if Soarin is alone,” she lifted her other hoof and brought the two together, “then maybe-“

“We can’t force two ponies to fall in love,” Spirit said sternly. “I think some of us learned about this last Hearts and Hooves Day when a certain somepony loaned a history book to a trio of inquisitive fillies.”

Twilight flushed. “Oh right. Sorry, my bad.”

“That’s quite alright.” Spirit looked up at the pegasus mare, who’d started spinning the cloud and kicking it methodically. “Unless Cutie Control gave us some sort of sign to show that she is indeed interested in helping Soarin out of the gutter, then it might be okay.”

Up above, Cutie Control gripped the cloud and stopped its revolving. She smiled sadly and lifted the cloud over her head. It was in the shape of a heart. A big, fluffy heart.

Cadance smirked at Spirit. “Is that enough of a sign for you?”

The dark-blue pony nodded. “Let’s do this.”

“I’ll go invite her down.” Cadance spread her purple-tinged pink wings and flew up towards Cutie Control. Shining Armor leaned in. “Do you think we’re doing the right thing?” he whispered to the two smaller unicorns.

“We’re about to find out,” Twilight replied.

Cadance had returned with Cutie Control. The pegasus looked calm and happy, but her eyes were tinged with red. “Hey guys,” she said in a quiet voice. “Can I help you?”

Twilight was worried. She wasn’t used to seeing Cutie sounding so down. “We were just wondering…” Twilight began. “ If maybe, you know, if you could…”

“How’s life treating you?” Spirit put in.

Cutie brightened, just a bit but it was something. “I beat Button Mash at Mega Mare earlier. Man, did he whine afterwards. After that he challenged me to Super Smash Ponies with Sweetie Belle, but he lost that too.”

Spirit nodded and hummed in agreement, but he could tell that everything Cutie was saying with her smile was forced. Inside, she was crying from heartache. “Have you spent some time with anypony… around your own age?” he asked carefully so as not to upset her.

Cutie’s smiled faded slightly. “No. I’m not really good with older ponies. They just don’t have the same gaming soul that colts like Button have.” She turned away and looked up at Cloudsdale. “Besides, there’s only one pony I’d want to spend time with, and he’s probably off training with his friends.”

Spirit exchanged glances with the others. It was clear to them now that Cutie felt towards a Wonderbolt, but which one remained to be seen.

“What I wouldn’t do for a pie I could give him,” Cutie added wistfully.

She said this so unexpectedly, Spirit and Twilight almost burst out laughing. Now they were sure it would all be okay. “Actually, Cutie,” Twilight said, sidling up beside the pegasus and pointing to the tree, “the pony you’re talking about is right over there.”

Cutie followed Twilight’s hoof and her eyes went wide when she saw who was there. “Ohmygosh,  ohmygosh, ohmygosh, ohmygosh, ohmygosh!” she squealed. “It’s Soarin! Now there’s a stallion I could spend Hearts and Hooves Day with, and any other day for that matter.”

“He’s actually been waiting for somepony himself,” Cadance said. “You may very well be that somepony.”

“I’m gonna go for it!” Cutie declared. She cantered off towards the isolated Wonderbolt, all her gaming cheer returning to her face.

"Yes!" Twilight cheered, just loud enough so that Spirit, Shining and Cadance could hear. "Now Soarin can celebrate Hearts and Hooves Day properly. And he won't be sad anymore either!"

"It certainly is something worth celebrating," Spirit said. "Come on, Shining. You and Cadance need a cool refreshing drink."

"Hold on, Spirit," Cadance warned. "This isn't over yet."

"What?"

"What do you mean it's not over?" Twilight asked the pink alicorn. "Those two are perfe-" Then she looked out at the tree. "Oh."

Cutie Control was standing in front of Soarin, petrified. Twilight and the others could see her mouth move, but she must have been incoherent because Soarin was just looking at her with a puzzled expression.

"Oh, you have got to be kidding me!" Spirit ranted. "She's too shy to ask him to be her special somepony. Now I've seen everything."

"It's not that easy, you know," Twilight reminded him. "It took me a while before I plucked up the courage to ask you."

"Yeah, but we learned in the same library," Spirit pointed out.

"The question is: what do we do now?" Shining wondered.

"We need Cutie Control to show Soarin how she feels," Cadance concluded. "So that he can see how much Cutie wants to be with him."

"How do we do that?" Spirit inquired. "Cutie can barely move, let alone speak. How're we going to help her if she can't say a word or even mime?"

Twilight's gaze wandered skyward, where Cutie Control's heart-shaped cloud fluffed about in the breeze. "I've got it! That cloud that Cutie made.

"The one she cloud-busted into shape," Spirit remarked. "Only a truly passionate pegasus could create such a piece."

Twilight gripped Spirit and shook him enthusiastically. "Don't you see? It's perfect! If we can get it down to her, Soarin will see how she feels!"

"Okay, we'll do it," Spirit complied, making sure his words got through despite his marefriend's lovingly rocking him. "Just please stop shaking me and calm down."

"Oh, sorry."

Shining looked up at the crafted cloud. "So we just float it down to the tree?"

"It could work," Cadance said gingerly. "But we might want to hurry it up before their asking first date takes a turn for the worse."

Twilight pulled Spirit, Shining and Cadance into a semicircle. "Okay everypony. Lights!"

As one, the four ponies activated their magic, lighting their horns and surrounding Cutie Control's cloud in four colored auras. Then, like a party balloon, they slowly tugged the mass of vapor downward. Their minds focused and their best interest at heart, they brought the cloud down to Equestrian. When it reached the tree, they tugged it past the branches and floated it down towards the two pegasi.

When Soarin saw the enormous heart, his eyes grew wide as wagon wheels. "What's this?" he asked Cutie, fascinated by the cloud and curious of its origin.

Cutie was just as shocked as he was. "M-m-my, h-h-how did, it..." She glanced sideways at Twilight and the others, who were all beaming hopefully. Cutie smiled and winked at them. She'd regained her composure. "It's for you, Soarin."

The Wonderbolt walked around the cloud and looked at it from Cutie's side. "For me?" he repeated.

"Happy Hearts and Hooves Day."

The smile that appeared on Soarin's face, while not surpassing Pinkie's, was certainly a smile to remember. "Cutie Control..." he said quietly turning his head.

"Yes Soarin?"

Soarin reached down and picked up Cutie's hoof. "Will you be my special somepony?"

Cutie's smiled tugged at her cheeks as she leapt onto Soarin, knocking the both of them behind the cloud and out of sight of Twilight, Spirit, Shining and Cadance. "That went well," Spirit said optimistically, his less-expressive face becoming jubilant.

"It certainly did," Cadance agreed.

"Now we can all enjoy Hearts and Hooves Day," Shining said gladly, nuzzling his wife.

Twilight pointed. "Look, here they come."

Soarin and Cutie, with their heart cloud in tow, skipped towards the Shipping Bar, both pegasi radiating an aura of pure joy that the unicorns and the Princess felt. "Thanks guys," Cutie said appreciatively.

"Yeah, thanks," Soarin echoed. "If it wasn't for you, I'd be spending the rest of the holiday in solitude, dreaming away."

"You're both very welcome," Twilight said, feeling elated from their success.

"It was our pleasure," Spirit assured.

Soarin squinted at Spirit. "Hey, I know you," he said suddenly.

Spirit coked his head to the side. "What do you mean?"

"I've heard about you," the pegasus stallion went on. He glanced at Cutie, who was looking a bit embarrassed. He looked over at the tables in front of the Bar, where Cotton Pop was laughing at one of Cheese's jokes. From the window, Soarin could see Auxesia and Riff chatting with Wave Ride and Broken Gears. In the second-storey window, Crimson Shadow was hunkering behind a wall of donuts as Bulletproof Love and Sweet Treat pelted him with cupcakes, to which he responded with a wave of cherries. "Aren't you one of the ponies from the Equestrian Exodus?"

The temperature seemed to drop several degrees and rise at the same time. The sky darkened and then brightened again. A sudden breeze blew a tumbleweed between the new couple, the students and the royals. Spirit turned towards Shining Armor and Cadance. "Go to the kitchen. Tell Dregon and Sweet Blasphemy it's time."

Shining Armor nodded, his expression serious. "Okay." He and Cadance turned and entered the Shipping Bar.

"You two should come in with us," Spirit said to the pegasi. "Twilight, round up any ships outside. They'll need to sit on the floor, but it's the only way."

Twilight looked uncomfortable. "Do we really have to do this now? Today?"

Spirit looked into Twilight eyes. "We've already been asked to share what we know. It really is time to tell."

Twilight turned away for a moment, but nodded. "Okay. If you say so."

"Mmm. Soarin, Cutie, let's go inside."

The unicorn stallion led the two special someponies into the Shipping Bar while his own marefriend rounded up the couples at the outdoor tables. It was time everyone knew the truth behind their own arrivals.
> The Waifu I Never Wanted
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

"May I have your attention please? Everyone, may I have your attention please?"

Spirit stood in front of the kitchen window with Twilight, waiting for silence. The tables in the center of the room had been cleared aside, and couples all squashed together around them. Everyone had moved about in such a way that all the duplicates of the same pony, dragon or draconequus would be together, seated around the original but still near their partners. Any couples who visited earlier and left had returned, finding two seats among the crowd. Cutie Control and Soarin were giving their eyes and ears to Spirit, but otherwise were focused on eating a Friendship Glacier - an ice cream enchanted so that any pony eating it would taste their partner's favorite food, which more often than not was something they too enjoyed.

"Okay, is everyone ready?" Spirit asked.

Crimson Shadow looked horrified. He ducked down behind the second-floor railing and resurfaced with a sturdy camouflage helmet on his head, an eye-patch over his normal eye and holding a serious-looking mallet with his magic. "I am now," he responded, floating the mallet over the couples below as he spun it around like a top.

Everyone laughed. Screams of mirth burst out of the Shipping Bar like air out of a popped balloon. Galileo and Auxesia laughed so hard they squawked. Spike ended up getting the hiccups and belched out a scroll from Celestia wishing everybody a happy Hearts and Hooves Day. In the corner, the three Doctors flipped their table as their partners tried to regain their own self-control. It was absolute chaos, and that was without Discord flinging sugared donuts everywhere.

Spirit could barely contain himself. Randomness was one of the few things he had no defenses against. Twilight too was doing her best to hold in her laughter, having to bury her face in Spirit's mane. "Alright, you had your fun, ha ha. Are you ready for this?"

"Yep, I'm good," Crimson promised. Several other ponies called out as well.

"We're all ready."

"I've been waiting to hear this."

"More cupcakes, please."

"More cider, please."

"Yay!"

"Come on, I wanna hear this!"

"Okay, everybody calm down!" Twilight waved her horn and a pale purple sphere of magic emitted from the tip, slowly growing outward and shushing the couples it passed over.

"Thanks you, Twilight," Spirit said once the sphere had dissipated. "Now, I'm sure you're all wondering why we've asked for your attention when you were busy."

"It was nice and peaceful until then too," one of the Rainbow Dashes snickered, causing the other cyan pegasi to giggles.

"I'm sure. Anyway, you're obviously happy with your present company, but does anyone remember how this company came into your life?"

Several couples started muttering among themselves, but it was Cutie Control who said what they were all thinking. "The Equestrian Exodus."

Spirit nodded. "Some of you will remember, but for others it'll have just been another world-shaking event, the kind of which you shake off every other week." He started walking around the room, giving everyone a chance to hear him clearly. "Several months ago, a strange thing happened. A terrible thing, and we all know what it was: a new evil had come to Equestria, its only intentions to wreck havoc and spread destruction."

"Not unlike everything else that's plagued us, eh Discord?" Galileo joked, not intending to offend the draconequus.

"That's quite alright," Discord promised, but he still tied a sound-grenade-balloon to the gryphon's tail.

"Actually Galileo, it was quite different from the past evils," Twilight corrected.

The gryphon's face scrunched up in confusion. He looked at his girlfriend and Auxesia whispered into his ear. Galileo ooh'd in understanding. "Oh yeah, my bad."

"Who did the Princesses ask for assistance in stopping the threat? None other than the Bearers of the Elements of Harmony." Spirit conjured images of the legendary artifacts over the heads of the six ponies who wield themed, wherever they were situated: Fluttershy with Discord, Rainbow Dash amidst her own doubles' ships, Applejack with some of her family members and their companions, Rarity cuddling with Spike, Pinkie beaming alongside Cotton and, of course, Twilight Sparkle at his side.

"They came together and activated the Elements, in hopes of defeating the monster. But instead of fighting using its offensive magic, the Elements pulled a different piece of magic. The magic that brought us all to Ponyville."

"I remember that!" Bulletproof called out. "Me and Vapour were out enjoying the sun when suddenly all we could see was a bright light, then we found ourselves near Ponyville."

"Sounds familiar," Muse commented. "Riff and I were cleaning up after a music session when we weren't in the room anymore."

"I'd just finished constructing my color bomb," Cotton recalled, receiving a blinding smile fro Pinkie, "but instead of lying in wait patiently listening out for the sound of a passing couple, outside my hiding place I heard a ground-shaking roar."

"We all found ourselves close to the commencing battle," Spirit continued, "but the six ponies who were given the task found their main weapon useless."

"It was frightening," Twilight recounted and the other five mares nodded in agreement. "To have used the Elements many times before, and then fail to activate them against that creature." She stopped and stared off into space as her mind replayed the unsettling memory. "I almost thought it was over right there."

"But then we all came in and helped you out!" Broken Gears declared.

"Indeed we did," Spirit confirmed, his voice becoming dramatic as he recounted the event. "Each of us came to the battle in a unique way, some of us with friends, others individually, but we all came together and combined our strength. It was on that day that our friendship was forged!"

Spirit's words were met by deafening applause, ranging from the light clip clop of the foals to the sharp clap of Discord and the gryphons. "But this wonderful feat was not achieved that very afternoon. It was slowly built over time as we adapted to our new situation, finding our place in a new location. We found that our new setting was comfortable and peaceful—"

"Aside from the dangers that are about as regular as clockwork," one of the Doctors pointed out.

"Yes, except for that." Spirit stopped as the Shipping Bar rang with laughter. "So we wrapped up loose ends and moved into our new life, some of us having familiar faces to work with while others..... well, we had to go for some time without somepony watching over us."

"Some of us even up until recently," Cutie reflected, nuzzling Soarin.

"Mm." Spirit tapped the floor, then looked up. "You've all had your share of experiences over these last few months. We've gathered here on this day to share what we've gained in that time. Hearts and Hooves Day is a time to bring you and your special somepony closer, and that leads us to the Shipping Bar. Twilight?"

The purple unicorn stepped forward. "When I first saw Spirit, when the Elements summoned him to the battlefield, I had no idea who he was or where he'd come from. But after the danger had passed, we took the matter home. There we developed a strong bond, one that we felt everypony and everybody should be allowed to feel. And so we built the Shipping Bar, a place where the very best and closest of friends can come together and strengthen their connections."

Spirit held Twilight's hoof in his own. "Our desire to share this happiness also brought something troubling to our attention," Spirit explained. "After checking things out, we found that some ponies felt affection towards the same pony. Or dragon or gryphon, as the case may be. At first we were saddened by this reality, but then we came across a most revolutionary finding."

"Many of you already know what we're talking about," Twilight said, "but now it's time you all see it with your own eyes." She turned to her coltfriend. "Ready?"

"Ready."

The two unicorn scholars crossed their horns and lowered their heads to the floor. Their magic auras combined and spread across the floor. Shining, Leaf and the tens of others were left pulling their hooves and legs out of the way of the magical wave, of whose properties they knew not. The entire Shipping Bar shuddered to its foundations, where the magic had leaked into. Two sections of the floor slid under the rest of the tiles, revealing a secret that only the Everfree Forest could match.

"Fillies and gentlecolts, gryphons and dragons and draconequui, I present to you the Mirror Pool."

Beneath the floor, a perfect circle was carved out of the ground, filled with fresh clear water. Anyone looking into the pool saw their reflection, but noticed how it seemed to twitch where they weren't. That aside, the images in the water were obedient and calm, just as reflections should be

Pinkie and Pinkie leapt out of their seats and neared the edge of the pool. "Sparkly!" Pinkie squealed as Pinkie touched the cool, clear water, the two Pinkies reflected in the pool reacting likewise.

Spirit used his magic to gently nudge the two pink ponies away. "This pool is the reason most of us are gathered here today. As Twilight and I had mentioned, following the defeat of the threat, we realized that some ponies had taken a liking to other ponies. Unfortunately, those 'other' ponies tended to be the same pony, resulting in loneliness falling upon one individual while guilt crept onto the other in their happiness. After much study and research, Twilight and I found a way to recreate a more powerful version of the Everfree Mirror Pool, one that would create perfect matches of the ponies who use them."

"And thus began the era of walking down the street and seeing yourself," Rainbow Dash joked, again receiving approval from her copies.

Twilight tapped the rim of the Pool. "Whenever somepony found that they liked somepony else's special somepony, they'd come tell us and the whole situation would be cleared up in a matter of minutes. Nopony feels cheated because all the clones are just like the original, sharing all past memories and readily making new ones. It was a bright change in the lives of many ponies and much conflict was averted."

"For those of us who weren't happy to begin with," Sweet Blasphemy commented, gaining consent from Muse, Vapour and Auxesia.

"Hearts and Hooves Day has always been a time for couples to form and bond," Spirit said. "Twilight and I created the Shipping Bar in hopes of further strengthening the bond that exists between the very best of friends. In the process, we have discovered more than what we had originally expected."

"Including things we had no knowledge of to begin with," Twilight added, nuzzling Spirit. The blue unicorn stared tenderly at the purple pony and returned the gesture, resulting in a loving hug between the two.

The feeling was unanimous. Every couple in the Shipping Bar had to agree.

"D'aaaaaw!"

The moment was short, but it was sweet. Spirit and Twilight stood straight and tall, staring into each other's eyes. Two bands of magic shot out of their horns, one purple and one blue, curling over their heads and around the cafe. Couples and ships chuckled and gasped as the magical ribbons spiraled about. Finally, they came to rest on the surface of the Mirror Pool, forming a sparkling heart on the surface. The whole Pool glowed and blinded everyone, except for Discord and Fluttershy as they were both equipped with sunglasses.

The light dimmed and everyone blinked the stars from their eyes. They all looked around and their gaze rested on the two unicorns who had cast the bedazzling piece of magic. Wave Ride turned to Princess Cadance. "Was that what I think it was, or am I dreaming?"

The alicorn princess shook her head. "You're not mistaken, Wave. The spell that we just witnessed was fueled by magic that was achieved through love. The same magic that Shining Armor and I used to stop the changeling invasion."

"Only less violent," Shining put in.

Twilight glanced up at Spirit's horn, Spirit doing the same for her's. Then they reinstated their gazing at each other, silently conversing about what had just happened. It was right then that they realized just how strong their bond had become over the months. The two unicorns leaned in, closed their eyes and—

BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

"Oooooh, moment ruined!" a Rainbow Dash called out, resulting in back-pats from her fellow cyan pegasi and thrown empty platters from several couples.

Twilight sighed. She reached into her mane and pulled out a vibrating metal scale. She looked up at Spirit. "I knew somepony was missing."

"Mm. You'd best go meet them halfway. I'm sure they'd love a snack."

"I'll do that," Twilight said, tucking the scale back into her mane. "And you will—"

"Wrap up in here," Spirit replied, putting a hoof to his marefriend's chest. "You go bring in the happy couple. Things will have calmed down once Rainbow apologizes."

"He he. Yeah, that'll take a while." Twilight began making her way towards the door, but stopped halfway. She darted back, gave Spirit a quick peck on the cheek, then hurried around the Mirror Pool and out the door, her gleeful giggling still perceptible.

Spirit shook his head, but smiled all the same. I hope Stormie and Caleb are doing okay. I'll have to ask them when they get here. In the meantime... "All right, everyone!" he announced to all those present. "Hearts and Hooves Day is drawing to a close, but me and Twilight have something special planned for the end."

"Candy?" Sweetie Belle guessed.

"Lectures?" Rainbow Dash presumed.

"Hugs?" Leaf Turner offered.

Chaos?" Discord acclaimed

"Everyone being quiet so Spirit can finish?" Paint Splash hinted. That shut them all up, although the guilty ponies did swap smirks and the draconequus conjured a cream pie, which was promptly claimed by Black Canvas.

"Thank you, Paint," Spirit said. "As I was saying, we've got a surprise in store for you with this lovely day ending. A shipment of fireworks is being brought here, but these are unlike any fireworks you've seen before; they are marvels containing a mixture of magics that will form shapes that any designated individual can control and you will all be given such command over these pyrotechnic wonders."

The Shipping Bar erupted into cheers and applause. The fillies and colts jumped about excitedly. The older ponies nodded and began chatting about past light displays. And everyone in between was a mixture of dancing, conversing, ignoring, ordering and eating. Dregon walked over to Spirit. "Astral and Midnight should be here within the hour," he whispered to the unicorn.

"Also," Sweet Blasphemy added, craning her neck on Spirit's other side, "we should probably close up the Mirror Pool before somepony falls in."

"Thank you both for your input. I'll see to it at once." The couple stepped back and Spirit walked forwards, his horn shooting sparks that trailed along the side of the pool. When the body of water was ringed with magic, attracting the attention of several ponies, Spirit lifted his head and—

BAM!

A blast of heavily condensed magic knocked the bar's doors open and threw Spirit up against the wall. Dregon was knocked into the kitchen counter and SB got her wings tangled up in the catapult. Everybody else had received leftover gusts from the blast, but were shocked by what they saw in the entrance. Spirit blinked away the six-pointed stars, his eyes growing wider as he contemplated what he saw standing in the doorway.

"Sorry about that," Twilight said as she sauntered into the Shipping Bar. "That door needed repairing anyway." The purple unicorn ambled across the cafe, stroking ponies as she passed them by, leaving them shaking disgustedly. "I must say, this is a nice setup. 'Specially this water hole right here." She dipped a hoof in the water.

"Don't move!" Crimson warned, his horn and his eye glowing menacingly.

"HALT, TWILIGHT SPARKLE!" Luna rumbled in the Royal Canterlot Voice.

Twilight looked up at the two ponies, her expression bored. "Chill, 'icorns," she said casually. "Sit your overpowered plots down."

Luna did so, mostly out of habit and partly in shock. Crimson remained standing, glaring down from the second floor. Twilight ignored them and continued her walk. "Hearts and Hooves Day," she declared. "Ponies use it to help forget the rough times they've been through. And what a time it was! Magical explosions, hacking claws, battle cries. That last battle really took its toll on Ponyville. Way I heard it, foals stayed awake in their beds for a week after the monster was vanquished. Too bad you didn't do such a great job cleaning up, eh Spirit?"

Twilight now stood in front of the blue unicorn. Spirit stared down his muzzle at her, his brow furrowed. "Oh, but what a simple pony you are!" Twilight exclaimed, slowly circling him. "Studious, faithful, everything a bookworm could ever want. Especially one as nerdy as Twilight Sparkle."

"Where is she?"

The question dropped from Spirit's mouth like a hefted brick, shattering the silent spell. The purple unicorn giggled. "You figured it out, you clever colt! Indeed, I'm not the one you're so head-over-hooves for." This statement was met by much muttering from the crowd, which 'Twilight' largely ignored. "Care to take a guess at what I really am?"

"A changeling!" Button Mash called out, rearing up at his table and drawing a squarish sword.

Twilight laughed, but it was a creepy spine-tingling sound, not the joyful mirth her friends knew. "What a foalish thing to suggest! Then again, I wouldn't expect anything less from a colt who spends his time playing video games and carrying foam cosplay weapons."

Button's sword dropped from his mouth, bouncing on the table top as the gamer gaped.

"Hmm, looks like I was right." Twilight turned to the crowd. "Since you're all clearly too dumb to figure it out, I'll give you a hint."

The purple unicorn reared up, her eyes and horn flashing with lavender light. The Shipping Bar doors slammed open and a pulsating cloud hovered inside. As it entered, crooked branches shot out of the cloud and grabbed at the air, startling the watching couples before slowly retracting.

"Isn't it beautiful?" Twilight stroked the cloud fondly. "This is all that's left of the great threat to Equestria, after you all 'defeated' it. You really are dumb to think you'd gotten rid of it so easily."

"Beating that thing was not a piece of cake!" Bulletproof objected. Several of the other stallions muttered in agreement.

Twilight laughed again. "Ha! Still in denial over your failure. Then again, the plan wouldn't be very good if it didn't fool you all."

"Enough!" Spirit thundered, stomping with a hoof. Very few present could remember seeing the unicorn this mad before. "Where is Twilight?"

"Oh, you mean the one I'm based on? She's off picking up your friends, stupid. But I'll probably remedy that, soon after we're through here." She looked to the dark cloud, now floating over the Mirror Pool, and waved a hoof at it. "And now..."

Spirit, Discord, Dregon and the Doctors realized what was about to happen just before it did, but they were too slow to stop it. Even as the unicorns started up their magic and the Time Lords pulled out their sonic screwdrivers, the fluctuating cloud dropped into the Mirror Pool like a rock with barely a ripple

Everyone in the Shipping Bar stared at the almost-still waters, afraid to blink. Then the waters of the Mirror Pool changed color, from the pale blue of the basin to a dreary storm-grey. A cloud of steam erupted from the Pool and dissipated as bubbles rose to the surface and popped. Then a bright pink hoof poked out of the pool, followed by an equally pink pony with poofy hair.

The clone grinned. "Hi."

More ponies began to climb out of the Mirror Pool: Pinkies, Rainbow Dashes, Twilights, a few Doctors with magically dry ties and hats and many others beside. They emerged from the water and ringed the pool, grinning at the couples who stared back in confusion and horror.

"This isn't how the Mirror Pool works," Pinkie commented, Pinkie nodding in agreement.

Spirit looked about at the over-friendly-looking duplicates, then returned his attention to 'Twilight'. "I can't imagine what you'll do with clones," he said indifferently. "Your main power source is gone."

"Not anymore." 'Twilight' pointed at the Mirror Pool. "Now the magic waters of your Mirror Pool are our life source. With it, we shall multiple endlessly and overtake Ponyville, then Canterlot, then all of Equestria. It shall be a chaotic age, far more disastrous then Discord's."

"Hey!" the draconequus shouted indignantly, stretching over the crowd until he was face-to-face with the purple unicorn. "I won't have some magical-illusion copycat pony mock my old habits!"

The phony Twilight swung her horn and in a flash of magic, Discord was sent flying into the wall. Fluttershy rushed over to help him up; the Chaos spirit was a bit disoriented from the attack, if his rolling eyes were anything to judge by.

"See?" 'Twilight' said. "Even Discord can't stand up to our power." A Rainbow Dash and a Flash Sentry came over to her, both draping a wing over the purple unicorn's back. Dark-purple magic spilled out of Twilight's horn and encircled the three ponies. "The magic is inside all of us. The more of us there are, the stronger it gets. And it's not limited to the unicorns between us either."

To prove Twilight's point, the two pegasi clones beside her leapt into the air and raised their hooves over their heads. Swirling orbs of energy materialized and Rainbow and Flash released them, sending the pulsing accumulations of magic into the floor directly in front of Sweet Treat and Sunset Love.

Spirit took a step back. He'd guessed the new clones would be different, but not like this. He was confident that he, Shining, Dregon and the others could handle malfunctioning Mirror Pool clones, but this herd was full of malicious motivation, brought into being through the doorway he and Twilight had created.

SLAP! No, not this Twilight. This Twilight is a spawn of the Equestrian threat, taking an appeasing form to get under my guard. Spirit looked out the window, but he couldn't see his marefriend anywhere through the limited view it offered. Guess I'll have to deal with these mutations solo.

"Shining, Discord, now!"

The prince of the Crystal Empire and the spirit of Chaos charged up their magic on both sides of the room, Spirit doing the same by the kitchen. When their power had peaked, the three magic users released their pent-up energy and spread it over the crowd, creating enchanted barriers between the new clones and the couples.

Spirit, Sweet Blasphemy and Dregon looked down the tunnel of shimmering magic; one side light cerulean, the other a mix of transparent hues. On both sides, Discord and Shining Armor held up the barriers, keeping the threatening clones away from the citizens. The eyes of the Twilight clone rolled back and forth between the magic walls separating them from the visitors. "So, you really want to face us. We won't be holding back."

The clones started to move slowly toward the three ponies by the kitchen. Dregon grimaced and lowered his head, aiming his horn at the approaching duplicates. SB gave them a defiant stare as she whipped her wings about. Spirit continued to gaze at the clones, his mind racing in search of a means to keep their attention away from his friends.

> Reflections of Friendship
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Your existence. What is it?"

The modified clones stopped in their places. 'Twilight' scrutinized the blue unicorn who had aimed the question at herself and the other new copies. "What do you mean?" she inquired.

Guess she copied at least one of Twilight's attributes right. "Why do you exist?" Spirit pressed. "What are you supposed to with your.... I guess we'll call it life?"

At first, a bleak silence. Then—

"Ha! Ha ha! AHA HA HA HA HA!!!" The purple unicorn began to laugh maniacally. One of the Rainbow Dash clones started laughing too, then a Pinkie clone joined in. All the other new duplicates following suite until the Shipping Bar was filled with the sound of insane mirth.

"You jest!" the Twilight clone insisted. "Our objectives are the same as ever: crush and conquer."

"But why?" Sweet Blasphemy asked. "Why would you want to keep your old macabre motives? Does your pony form not give you another option?"

"No, of course no—

"Surely the Mirror Pool grants you freedom of choice," Dregon said. "All the other clones choose to be with somepony else, even though they can do whatever they want."

"We can?" Pinkie exclaimed in shock, beaming gleefully.

"Of course we can!" Pinkie smiled back. "But why would we look for something else when we're happy where we are?" She turned and snuggled Cotton, who offered her a cupcake in reply.

"We ain't got no reason to get up and leave ourselves," Applejack declared, Rarity happily leaning her head against the earth pony's shoulder. "We're livin' real lives here."

"The fabrication of time and space has never been more stable," one of the Doctor's reported. "After your master was eradicated, the boiling rift it had caused in between the universes suddenly disappeared. Even the time stream is calm. You have no reason to continue whatever it had planned."

"What we're all trying to say is," Spirit continued, "why choose to be evil when there's no one to tell you to be evil? Why act on the path that makes others hate, fear and despise you? Why be shady and untrustworthy when you can become a great friend?"

The Twilight clone's sneer slowly vanished from her face and a thoughtful expression appeared in its place. The ponies all looked on, hopeful looks all around. Even Discord managed to stay silent and look enthusiastic about the possible outcome.

ZAP

A jet of purple magic seared the floor directly in front of Spirit. The Twilight doppelganger blew the smoke from her horn. "Please. Don't try to play your friendship games with us. There's nothing to appeal to. Nothing to befriend. We are darkness, molded into familiar shapes. We were made to be evil. That's all we are."

"Besides," the Pinkie next to her said, "there's no point trying. We'll never be as good as the originals. The ponies we're based off of will always be the alpha, and we will always be the underdogs. We will never amount to anything other than the bad guys."

"That's not true!"

Pinkie Pie stood up, her expression stern. "We may be copies, but we still have our own personalities. Sure, we're based off of somepony else, but the things we do and the choices that we make change us into different ponies completely. We don't have to be limited to who we started as."

"She's right," the Doctor added, standing as well. "When we came into being, all we had were the basic behaviors of the pony we were built in the shape of. After that, anything we did was completely our own. But we made our own choices."

"We acted differently than the original," a Rainbow Dash declared, rising up from among her duplicates. "That shaped who we became. None of us was exactly like the original, but we all turned out awesome."

"It was all up to them," Dregon said, gesturing at the seated clones. "They made decisions that made them who they are, but even thought they all had the same roots, they turned out different. Surely you can do the same."

The threat clones all looked about in confusion, indecision making them wary and shy. The Twilight clone at their head looked down at the floor intensely, trying to gather her thoughts when she caught sight of the daylight reflecting off the surface of the cafe's Mirror Pool. She brought her gaze up until she was looking at Spirit, Sweet Blasphemy and Dregon. Her grim frown split into a wicked grin.

"You poor, simpleminded fools." She spread her legs out and lowered her head. "We're not so easily changed as those worthless good two-horseshoes. We are manifestations of true power, and we have only one goal. Choices are not only not available to us, we wouldn't care for them anyway. It's just not us."

"We prefer the path of destruction," the Pinkie behind her put in, the other threat clones making violent motions. "Tearing things down, putting an end to peaceful existence. That's what we exist for."

Spirit kept a straight face, but inside his feelings were all in turmoil. It may not have been the real Twilight and Pinkie who were speaking, but just the image of his friends talking like that was painful. He knew he had to end it before his friends got hurt, and end it fast. Looking at the force fields Discord and Shining armor were sustaining, a plan began to form in his head.

"You're making your choice, then. To remain as you are, to never improve, to never change to good from evil." Spirit's words rang out through the Shipping Bar, earning him everyone's attention. "As a resident of Equestria, it is my duty to eliminate threats to the citizens. And you are ALL threats."

The blue unicorn spread his legs and prepared himself. His horn spewed magic, wrapping around it and gathering into a thicker and larger mass. SB and Dregon knowingly stepped back to the safety of the kitchen. The ponies, dragons and gryphons watched in awe as their host increased the strength of his spell with each passing moment. The threat clones watched too, their cocky evil grins one by one disappearing, until only Twilight's teeth showed.

"You FOOL!" She leaped towards Spirit, summoning her own magic, and brought her horn down slashing through the air. A loud crack sounded as the purple unicorn clone was thrown back into the crowd of corrupt duplicates. Looking back, the crowd found a barely-visible aura forming around Spirit, a barrier fueled by the still-charging spell.

"The only fool here," Spirit said, his voice magnified with power, "is the one who can't see the right way. Once you lose sight of it, you feel as though nothing can bring you back. Then again, you can't miss what you never had."

"Got that right," 'Twilight' spat. "We never had compassion, nor the need for it. That is how it is, and that is how it shall be when we're through with you."

NO

A magical twister spun out of Spirit's horn. It whirled around, sending wild winds throughout the Bar. Ponies grabbed their partners and hung on as cutlery and food went everywhere. The clones began to rise off the ground as the tornado grew bigger and bigger, filling the space between the force fields. 

I will not allow you to harm any friend of mine. If you're going to try to hurt any of them, then I will stop you.

The tornado increased in size. When it spun against Shining Armor and Discord's force fields, it squashed up against the barriers, offering an amazing spectacle for the visitors. The threat clones were all flung into the air, swirling aorund and around as Spirit walked the twister towards the door, his face a mask of controlled rage.

This is the end of you, he thundered in a voice that was layered with inner might. His eyes blazed with magic. This is the end of the threat.

"AH!"

In a single instant, the light in Spirit's eyes dimmed and his face morphed into concern. He galloped the rest of the way out of the Shipping Bar, the magical tornado-full of evil clones in front of him like a dragon on a leash, and looked around. Standing on the trail was a black-maned brown pegasus stallion and an unusual mare who sported one normal wing, one bat wing and her whole right side was covered with metallic scales complete with a red eye.

But when Spirit's turned to the sound of the noise, his eyes widened in horror. Spinning at the very top of his dust devil, making bigger circuits than any of his victims and screaming like a filly, was Twilight.

Dregon and Sweet Blasphemy appeared in the doorway, while the other couples watched from the safety of the windows. Spirit watched Twilight fly around and around high above him. She must have been about to welcome Stormie Reeds and Caleb Becker, he realized, glimpsing briefly at the pegasus and the half-metal mare. The tornado slunk out the door and picked her up.

Looking up, Spirit locked eyes with Twilight. The stallion realized he would not be able to do away with the threat clones as he originally intended to, not without hurting his marefriend through the Mirror Pool. An old acquaintance's words flashed through his mind: One day, you will be faced with a choice where you will have to choose whether to save your friends or save the world. The question is, Spirit Guide, when the time comes, what will your choice be?

Spirit knew that, in order to save Twilight, he would have to cancel out his magic twister, which would release the threat clones, unleashing them upon Equestria. But if he proceeded with his original plan, Twilight would be—

I guess I have no choice.

Spirit closed his eyes and reared up, the tornado rising with his movement and panicking the clones trapped inside it. Twilight just watched him as she swirled around endlessly, her eyes sad as she tried to figure out his plan.

Then, with a full-body flourish, Spirit brought his horn crashing against the earth.

Like a felled tree, the twister slammed down onto the soil, spraying dirt and sod everywhere. The magical column of wind dispersed in seconds, leaving a long pile of dazed, groaning clones. At the tip of the heap, Twilight sat up and shook her head, surveying the general chaos. She turned towards the Shipping Bar, where tens of pairs of eyes watched her hopefully.

"Spirit?"

Her coltfriend leapt on her and embraced Twilight in a fierce hug. Spirit gripped the lavender mare as the couples began to stir inside the restaurant. Shining and Discord lowered their barriers and the ships streamed out of the establishment. Twilight was silent for a moment. "Spirit," she whispered.

"I know I may have doomed Equestria to the evil clones, but even if I hadn't, I couldn't go on without you, Twilight. Your presence in the room allows me to study at ease, the experience becoming more than research whenever you partake in it. If I had to fend off another attack, I would not be able to knowing that I had willingly chosen to take you out just to defeat a foe."

Spirit poured out in front of the crowd, his eyes becoming wet as his words washed over them all. A sense of faith spread throughout the mass and each individual turned to their partner, silently strengthening their own bonds just as Spirit declared his own devotion to Twilight.

"I know you'd make the right decision, Spirit," Twilight said, gently squeezing his hooves. "Whatever it would be."

The blue unicorn relaxed at her words. "Your trust in me is comforting," he said with a wry smile. "Just try not to get into situations that would lead to me having to make a world-ending choice."

Twilight giggled. "I'll try." The she hugged him.

"D'aaaaaw!" the couples cheered again, never tiring of a loving sight.

The newcomers, Stormie and Caleb, trotted over to the owners of the bar. "It really was our fault," Stormie said, blinking her mismatched eyes. "If we hadn't come so late, none of this would have happened."

Caleb nodded in agreement. "Mm hmm. We absolutely should have come earlier like everypony else."

"But," Stormie added quickly, "I'm sure you'll be happy to hear the reason for our lateness."

"I hope we will be, too," Twilight said.

"Hey!"

A shout issued from the heap of messed-up Mirror Pool clones. The leading Twilight poked out from beneath her sore herdmates and stood atop them all. "You think.... you can just.... suck us all up and... get away with it?" she demanded, in a bossy but exhausted voice, the kind the real Twilight would speak in after a full night of studying.

Spirit and Twilight looked up at their worn-out foe as she stumbled and slipped to the bottom of the pile. The other threat clones started to untangle themselves until they were all upstanding, some facing the visitors and some facing the owners. "No matter," 'Twilight' conditioned, swaying a bit. "We'll... take you out.... now."

She almost collapsed right there, but the evil core of her existence kept her upright. The real Twilight looked over at the Shipping Bar and the crowd assembled before it, and then turned to Spirit. "What was that about not going into battle without me?" she asked.

The stallion grinned. "You know what I'm like when it comes to promises, Twi."

"Mmhmm."

The two friends turned to face the threat, swung their lit horns through the air and, with a loud cry, leapt at them. The clones were so taken aback by the retaliation, they all stumbled over each other. When the couples saw what their hosts were up to, they caught on immediately.

And from there, it was chaos.

The ships with the most area-effect were possibly Cotton Pop, Cheese and the two Pinkies, who loaded up their party cannons with cake, confetti and Cotton's homemade color bombs, the resulting explosions spraying over the fray. Vapour was hovering in a misty cocoon, more-than gaseous clouds forming around her, which Bulletproof would send sailing through the air to take out their foes. Stormie captured the clones' attention with a show of rapid shape-shifting, while Caleb disappeared and snuck around back to clop them over the head. Galileo and Auxesia tore through the enemy with wing and talon, leaving any attacker bruised and out for the count. Crimson and Luna made a terrifying alicorn duo, the latter taking on the form of Nightmare Moon, paralyzing the clones with absolute terror, leaving them incapable of preventing Crimson from quickly slamming them with his sword.

Wave Ride was a big battlefield nuisance, zipping around the enemy and muttering about various attack strategies, while Paint Splash flew to his captured audience and knocked them out. Dregon, Sweet Blasphemy, Cutie Control and Soarin managed to work out a game of Hot Potato between earth and sky: Dregon with musical shockwaves, Cutie with her Big Honking Sword of Clone Whupping, and, in the air, SB and Soarin with a turn system of slaps that, in no time at all, knocked the clones unconscious. Muse zoomed to and for, sucker-punching every foe she came near, causing the clones to scatter, and all those who drew near Riff were beaten over the head with his guitar.

The coupled clones were everywhere. The Rainbow Dashes moved like a flock of giant technicolor birds, swarming foes and leaving them frozen in shock. TARDISes appeared at random, slamming into the evil duplicates while the Doctor inside shouted out his catchphrase. As each enemy clone dropped, Black Canvas and Sunset Love would strut over and drag the prone pony back into the Shipping Bar, where Sweet Treat and Leaf Turner would heave them back into the Mirror Pool, where they would disappear and not resurface. Thus the battle raged on, ships protecting each other's backs so as not to gain a single casualty on the Hearts and Hooves side.

At last, the only remaining threat clone was the fake Twilight. She stood her ground, completely surrounded by cocky couples and primed pairs. Together, they made a circle of affection and commitment around the clone.

'Twilight' clopped the ground and snarled. "This is not the end!"

"It certainly is." Spirit and the real Twilight walked into the circle and began to pace around the tarnished clone. "We have thrown each of your hateful duplicates into the Pool," Spirit went on. "Their essence shall disperse and the evil infusing them will vanish. The threat shall be removed entirely."

"You hope too much!" the clone cackled in an unsettling manner. "You assume too much."

"Hearts and Hooves Day is as much about hope as it is of about finding a match and bonding," Twilight declared, glaring at her evil copy. "We assume because we trust each other's judgements and thoughts. Otherwise, being an item would be meaningless."

The Twilight clone's face fell. "What's the point, though," she shouted desperately, "if the monsters and problems just keep coming back?"

"I'll tell you the point," Sweet Blasphemy announced, striding forwards and towering over most of the crowd. "One of the joys of having somepony close to your heart is knowing that said pony—or dragon or griffon—will stay by your side whatever you may face."

"That's right." Dregon stood by his mare's side. "The problems keep coming, but so do the loving ponies who vow to counter the threat to their homes."

"But right now," Spirit said, he and Twilight standing together before the clone, "the only loving ponies you should focus on are the ones present."

'Twilight' snarled and slashed her horn through the air. Some of the couples stepped back, but the clone's horn merely produced a pale glow and a dull whine. She looked up and her expression transformed into disbelief. "No. No, this is impossible."

The real Twilight leisurely drew nearer. "It would appear you need greater numbers to work your magic," she exclaimed, regarding her evil duplicate studiously. "Even the darkest of creatures require friendship."

"That seems to be the case," Spirit agreed.

The Twilight clone whipped her head back and forth, finding herself flanked. Spirit and Twilight lifted her into the air in their levitation auras and carried her kicking and screaming back to the Shipping Bar, the crowd of couples following behind in a huge procession of devotion. The caretakers of the Bar walked to the front and stood at the edge of their Mirror Pool, the cause of that day's monthly threat to Equestria, the last of the evil clones hovering above their heads.

"You are not going to -"

Ker-SPLASH

Spirit and Twilight dropped the purple copy mare into the Mirror Pool. The duplicate disappeared into the water with a final cry, fading from sight as she slipped beneath the surface. A cheer went through the two-storey establishment, the ponies, dragons and gryphons all shouting with joy. At last, the threat had been abolished.

With a sweep of his horn, Spirit closed the stone floor over the Mirror Pool. He then turned to the assembled lovers. "I'm sorry, everyone, that this day of bonding was tarnished by the outbreak of evil clones. Instead of spending Hearts and Hooves in peace, we had to take up arms and fight off danger."

"Pffft, oh, who are you kidding?" Cotton scoffed. "The original Hearts and Hooves day was way messier than today's."

Black Canvas nodded. "Yeah. Think of it as 'reliving history'."

"It wasn't that bad," Wave Ride remarked. "Like SB said, we got to face the threat with the ones we love." He nuzzled Paint Splash.

The others all began to exclaim in agreement. Hearts and Hooves day this year may not have been what they'd all expected, but they were unanimous on one thing: it was not spent in vain.

Princess Luna stepped forward. "I, for one, am proud to be who I am. I may not be the original Princess Luna, yet it is that very feature that makes me special. I am able to travel the land, make friends-" She looked at Crimson Shadow and smiled "-even love."

"We're not two-dimensional!" Pinkie shouted, gleefully, leaping onto Pinkie's back to tower over everyone except Discord. "We know what's worth it in life and what isn't. Being with the one who loves us, cares about us, our special somepony: we could go through anything with them!"

Hooves and claws were thrust into the air as more cheers rang out.  The sound-grenade-balloon Discord had tied to Galileo's tail popped suddenly, along with whatever control the ships were exerting over themselves. Earth ponies ran towards and headbutted one another. Pegasi pirouetted around each other in mid-air. Unicorns fired colorful sparks from their horns. The whole Shipping Bar descended into a chaotic joy, all of them partying in agreement over the simple fact of their being together.

It wasn't until the chairs were being raised that Twilight and Spirit decided things were getting out of hoof. "All right, everyone. Please calm down," Twilight requested. Needless to say, she wasn't heard over the noise.

Spirit pulled Discord to the front, interrupting the draconequues' careful stacking of cider mugs on Riff and Soarin's heads. "Think you can weave a little magic for us?" he asked, ducking as a mashed cupcake sailed overhead.

The Lord of Chaos cracked his lion fingers on his eagle claw. "With pleasure."

Discord reached around, over and under the kitchen counter, where Dregon and Sweet Blasphemy were staying away from the madness. He reeled himself back, his arms loaded with the stickiest of spreads and syrup. Twisting his body, Discord spun himself into a whirlwind and tumbled around the bar, sending ponies, dragons and gryphons alike into their seats while slapping them silly with sticky foodstuff.

"There we go!" Discord announced, gesturing to the general chaos. "One silent Shipping Bar, just as you ordered."

Twilight made a lopsided face as she looked around the restaurant. "Discord, that was really unnecessary," she told him. "Could you please clean up the mess you made?"

"Moi?" Discord grinned at the mucked-up ships, most of which were giving the draconequus dirty glares. "Oh, all right." With a snap of his rooster claw, the sticky flood disappeared. A couple of the males started staring daggers at Discord.

Spirit quickly jumped in. "Now that we have your attention, it's time we brought something to it. While we were having a grand old time repelling the forces of evil and reminding ourselves of the joy love brings, we got some last-minute visitors."

He stepped aside, clearing the view of the back door. Standing in the hallway was a grey pegasus mare with black spangled highlights on her wings and hooves, and a stallion with a coat like a space nebula. Between them sat a pile of crates with fuses, rockets fins and multicolored flower-looking objects poking out.

"Somepony here order the Flameless Fireworks of Friendship, Holiday Fun-For-All Pack?" the stallion asked, tapping one of the crates.

Twilight grinned and turned back to the crowd. "Fillies and gentlcolts, friends and families, the fireworks have arrived!"

The couples once more burst into applause. Twilight and Spirit lead the new arrivals, Astral Dusk and Midnight Flight, around the bar, where they got hugs and hoofbumps from the ship partners. At a signal from Spirit, the crowd got up and began to empty out of the Shipping Bar, assembling on the grass across the path where just moments ago broke out a battle between love and hate.

Luna and Crimson walked to the hilltop as the couples spread out over the expanse of soft grass. The sun lowered in the sky, responding to Celestia's magic and sinking behind the hill. The two alicorns raised their horns to the sky and crossed them, infusing their magic together. The moon rose and took its place in the sky, glowing with a soft mixed aura of blue and and red that somehow fit perfectly together in the night sky.

"Thank you, Luna and Crimson," Twilight said gratefully.

Crimson inclined his head. "Always welcome."

As the alicorns stepped down onto the field, Spirit and Twilight took the hill. Astral and Midnight flew their cargo to the hilltop and set it down between the two unicorns. "There we are," Midnight said as she removed the harness. "You know what to do, I take it?"

"Fireworks as special as these?" Spirit chuckled. "One would have to be a fool to use them irresponsibly."

"They really are something special," Twilight breathed, holding up one rocket and examining it in the moonlight. "A perfect piece of magical pyrotechnic engineering, complete with an assigning mechanism."

Astral rubbed the back of his head. "Yeah. How does that work again exactly?"

"Magic."

"Science."

"Magiscience," the Doctor declared, popping out of the crate of fireworks. "Lovely box, by the way. Reminds me a lot of the old girl."

Midnight smiled. "Right answer is best answer."

The five ponies each grabbed a load of fireworks, then hiked down to the field and started handing them out to the couples. As soon as an individual got hold of a skyrocket, the foot-long flower-capped rainbow-colored cylinder glowed as it registered the pony, dragon, draconequus or gryphon's touch. Everyone felt a strange vibration running along the length of their rockets.

"Each of you have a firm mental control over your firework," Spirit explained, having finished giving out the skyrockets. "This way, you can will it to shoot through the air, leaving a trail of sparks in its wake so you can practically draw in the sky." Paint, Leaf and Canvas squeed with joy at this.

"They won't burn out for a whole hour and if you choose to rest, it will remain hovering in the sky until you reinstate control," Twilight continued. "Just a few things we ask f you: don't try to crash into other rockets, don't bring them low down and don't cross the streams."

"Cross the streams?" Sweetie Belle repeated from beside Spike.

"What do you mean by that?" Sweetie Belle continued, Button Mash poking his firework at her side.

"Probably some grownup magic thing," Scootaloo remarked, looking back and forth between Rainbow Dash and her own rocket. "Nothing we need to worry about."

Spirit chuckled to himself. The innocence of youth. Still, she is right. He and Twilight walked past the couples and stood at the entrance to the Shipping Bar. They signaled to their friends, each one lowering their firework to the ground and tightened their grip on it.  All at once, the fuses began to spit sparks and the brightly colored flowers above began to vibrate.

"The ignition key has been inserted," Twilight whispered to Spirit. They looked out onto the field. Each and every pony, dragon, gryphon and draconequus was sitting beside their partner, watching the fireworks' display before it had even started. Even though not a soul among them could see it, an invisible force was at work, originating right in between the happy couples and slipping into the flamesless fireworks, giving it the final touch.

The Time Lords couldn't resist, and the look they shared sealed their unanimous thoughts. "Love is in the air!"

That was the last part needed. As one, the Flameless Fireworks of Friendship shot into the air like a prismatic updraft. The sight was so shocking that most of the ships forgot the controlling power they had over their rockets. But the moment they imposed their will, the most amazing sight ever began to literally flash above them.

Sparks in every color and hue, from red to violet, erupted in the wake of the ever-spiraling rockets. Even more closely-bonded couples had their fireworks weave and arc across the sky side-by-side, creating a beautiful dual image. Black Canvas, Paint Splash, Leaf Turner and the other more artistically-inclined had their rockets trace a mental course above their heads, creating glittery sketches and glowing drawings.

The fireworks were a huge and captivating success. So much in fact that Twilight and Spirit found it to be the perfect moment to take a break from their duties as Shipping Bar owners. The two unicorns crept back into the now-empty restaurant, closed the doors and went upstairs to the second floor. Twilight opened a hatch on the ceiling and she and Spirit climbed out onto the roof. From there, they had a grand view of Ponyville, their coupled friends and the rocket-filled sky.

"Another Hearts and Hooves day came and went," Twilight said, her eyes reflecting the colorful explosions.

Spirit nodded. "And quite the large part we had in it this year too."

"Hey, don't leave us out!"

The unicorn pair turned to see Dregon helping Sweet Blasphemy onto the roof. "We love-labored just as much as you two did today," Dregon reminded.

"As such," SB continued for him, "we thought it would only be fair to join you in your reprieve."

Twilight sighed, but smiled all the same. "I guess it would be okay."

The four ponies shifted on the roof, admiring the artwork in the sky and enjoying their sweetheart's company. They descended into appreciative silence, watching the fireworks even as some of the ponies orchestrating them began to tire and take their leave. The rooftop couples continued watching the spectacle quietly until somepony decided to break the spell.

"What are your resolutions for the rest and start of this and next year until next Hearts and Hooves day?"

The others groaned quietly. Trust Spirit Guide to construct an unnecessary and unnecessarily long question. But, as friends, they found themselves obliged to answer.

Sweet Blasphemy shrugged her silvery shoulders. "Not much new. What about you, Dregon?"

"To be there and to love my mare till the end of time," declared he, brushing aside a lock of her dark shimmering mane, "for she is my one true love."

Twilight simpered, shuffling right up against Spirit. "For me, it's the mysteries in life that make living so worth it. And solving those mysteries as well."

"Tonight's mystery: diving deeper into love with your special somepony."

"That would be nice," Twilight agreed. She turned and gave a humored stink eye at their roofmates. "If two certain someponies weren't nearby."

"Not our fault you kids don't know sharing."

"Hush, Dregon. You're killing the moment," Sweet Blasphemy insisted, turning his head toward her. "Come, give me some."

No more words came from the older couple, just floating mumbles and a lot of fur ruffling. Twilight rolled her eyes. "Loveducks."

"Shall we?"

Twilight leaned closer in reply and the two unicorns connected. Magical sparks, the likes of which only come from those in the deepest and strongest of intimacy, shot off the roof and into the sky, where they mingled almost lovingly with the still-crackling fireworks. Along with the heart sparks came an aura of assurance, assurance that another year of love and friendship lay ahead, another year to be with the ones we all care for.

And thus ended the tale of the Shipping Bar. Until next year, that is.