When You Were Never Really Here
It's so calm here, in the silent white world where Celestia and Luna don't exist. Where the clouds and empty space has no colour. And where I no longer see you. It's so calm here that it feels good. Not the strange good, but the good good.
Remember the time where we walked...and then the time where we spoke...and the time where we sworn to...and the tragedy behind us was simply a calamity of an melancholic mess in front of us. However, we usually walked around it and keep on our way. Oh how easy it was for us to do that, so easy it still feels good thinking about it. But none of that matters anymore. You are no longer here...and I'm all alone.
Strange enough...that feels good.
If there was a place you would like to go, where would it be? If there was a second you had a chance to change, what would you be? If you were granted the passage to the clarity of vivid serenity, could you tell me how...and could you tell me why you've swallowed in reality.
We're all alone here after all. But I'm here without you, so that contradicts us. If there was a moment in time you wish to change, what would it be? And what would it make you try to say? I think I understand how the universe works in its mysterious ways...yeah I think I do.
I always do...and it's good.
Remember how you smiled at me and said...do you remember how you held me close and whispered that...and do you remember how the world ended in our eyes and that mare of the sun next to the one of the moon failed to...only an entropy could have understood that mess. Only an entropy like you.
Somehow...it still feels good.
The holes are building up and this downward spiral is in reverse. The double helix is something I'm not used to seeing so much before me...well...so much before you. You were here before me weren't you? Free, my conflict, free from this painful symphony? We'll never be together soon...and I'm not afraid. My mind's no more but a flu for you to handle and me too. I guess we have our differences, either they'd be light or dark.
I guess you forgot what was going on just now...as the holes begin to widen out. It'll come to you soon, for me, and for you. It's been so much for me to handle lightly, but I guess that doesn't answer things about you.
Do you remember when we saw...and as it reached down to the ground, we cried because all we saw...and do you remember the heart-aches and the pain that we felt and saw that...I guess it'll come down soon enough for you. It all fades after all. And that's why I'm here...
I'm fading away...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O4bsEgZrw-Y
"Discord...I..."
"I already...know."
Wait…maybe…it does not have to be this way. Maybe I don’t have to be alone. Maybe I don’t have to push you away. Maybe I don’t have to create some sort of fake world where I could actually fade away. Yes…that’ll do me good.
Hey, do you remember when…and why we actually…and when it…and all that could have been. Made it possible into an satisfying ending. You done this for me…you made me happy. And so I want to return the favour. I want to make you happy. I want to make you whole. I want to make you safe. I want to make you satisfied. I want to make you complete. And all that could have been…would finally be what it should have been.
Maybe now it would be suitable, you know? To actually change the pace; where time no longer has its say. Finally, I can rest…but not alone. No, I can finally be...
Do you you feel the gentle touches of the rain, slowly landing upon us? I feel it. The rain is so smooth, moist, and relaxing; almost as relaxing to the frail snow during the winter. It fills you up until you're full, and soon washes you away to wherever it seeks to take you. It's like that rain is alive and simply interacting with us.
Look at me...such a mess...sounding like an old fool.
How could you even love an old fool like me? One who has only one meaning that opposes to yours. How could you still love me? I do enjoy my work, but how could I enjoy it...anymore...when I have descended further into this abysmal layers that laminates piece upon piece. Truly, I should disappear...but your presence speaks differently. So veracious and unvarnished. You make life's mendacious endeavors seem so easy to spot out. Dear...thank you.
But sadly, I must say something that will surely disappoint you, but with no intentions to apply such harm. My dear, it's a shame that knowing you're alive is the greatest pain of them all. Even if you push on through with the thought of accomplishing something in the end, you will not gain it back once you're dead. You may be my entropy, my beauty, and my everything, but sadly I am your opposite. I destroy but in meanings to recreate as for you destroy and seek it be nothing. We are opposites indeed, and we do not attract, which is why I am dying...dying for this is a fact.
Perhaps it is not at best great to be here alone, but it must be so if I wish to have you by my side as I fade away smooth and slow. For if you can remember the words I said, that...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yppksBz-JuI
~fin~