After so long I finally get to meet a human! But first I have to clear my search history...
Finally, after so long. Everyone said humans weren't real, that is until the day the princesses opened up a big portal right in the middle of Canterlot! I've been waiting for something like this to happen for ages! I wonder what he'll look like. What would he think of me? I knew humans were real!
A bit of a sequel to "Lyra's Dirty Little Secret". It's set later in the timeline as the rest of my stories, not past the point of where they'd end but definitely well into their respective stories. Eventually you'll start to see how things tie in. (Art belongs to John Joseco) Woo! Featured on 12/17/14 (somehow)
"Bon-Bon! Get up! Did you hear the news? Humans. Portal. Canterlot!." I shouted to my roommate in excitement. After reading the newspaper I ran home as fast as I could.
"Huh? Yeah, of course. I heard about it yesterday." she stated nonchalantly as she swung herself out of bed. My jaw dropped. How could she hear about something like that and not tell me right away!?
"AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME!?" I glared at her at her unflinchingly.
"You were at the club with Vinyl last night!"
"So? Humans have been in Equestria for like four months."
"Yeah but it was just a few of them and they aren't quite sure how they got here still." I sighed and crossed my hooves.
She sighed and rolled her eyes. "And I've seen it, there's mostly like diplomats and stuff right now. Ponies can't just walk up and take one like it's a pet store."
Damn. If only you could.
Before I could respond there was a knock at the front door. I followed Bon-Bon into the living room as she answered it. Hovering just outside was the mail-mare holding a package.
"Oh, hey Derpy."
"Hey Bon-Bon! Got a package for ya! Just need you to sign here and I'll be gone in a jiffy." She hoofed the box to Bon-Bon with a clipboard on top and pointed to the dotted line.
"Alright. Thank you. Have a nice day, Derpy." She signed with the pen that was attached to the clipboard and passed it back to Derpy.
"You too! Bye!" Bon-Bon closed the door after Derpy flew off.
She set it in the middle of the living room for us both to investigate, upon inspection we discovered that it was from none other than Princess Celestia.
"Holy shit! It's from the princess herself!" She exclaimed.
"Wow. Though it was probably just one of her assistants that sent it."
"True, true. But still!"
"Well what are you waiting for? Open it!" I said excitedly. As interested as I was it probably wasn't that action figure I ordered, which was odd because I ordered it weeks ago. Then I heard another knock on the door. I answered it and saw Derpy once more, she was holding another package although this one was much smaller than the other one.
"Hey again, sorry I forgot this one." She passed me the box and took off without another word. I used my magic to open it faster and found my action figure.
"Yes! Finally! Now I have the complete set!" He had a confident face and was well dressed, he'd fit in perfectly with the others. I set him next to the rest in a surprised pose and smiled as I backed away and looked at the whole scene.
"Don't you think..." Bon-Bon began as she struggled to open the tightly closed box from Celestia. "That it's a little creepy considering ponies know that humans are real now?"
"No...I mean maybe just a teensy-tiny bit but...okay shut up. What's in the box?"
As I asked she managed to pry open the hardest part and quickly unveiled its secrets. Inside was a wide variety of items, a number of books, a small pile of clothes as well as a pair of stunningly beautiful dresses for mares and a wide assortment of small items. On top all of it sat a pristine letter addressed to both of us. Bon-Bon was the first to reach for it, carefully opening the letter and reading what had been inside.
"Dear Lyra and Bon-Bon, as model citizens of Equestria you have been chosen to host a human within your home and care for him or her and introduce them to our way of life. If you do not wish to participate in this please send this letter and package back to the royal castle. In the case that you do, you will find books detailing human culture, anatomy, psychology, what we do know about them and much more. Please read these as thoroughly as you are able. In addition the dresses are in the event that you bring your human to a formal event such as The Grand Galloping Gala, as well as dress clothing for your human and four tickets to said event taking place in exactly two months on October 1st 1004 A.B. (On the human calendar it would fall on October 1st 2014). For the sake of time not all items shall be listed but it can be trusted that you will find all of them with ease. Be sure to read the personal file about the human you will be hosting so you can learn their background and miscellaneous information but it is encouraged to find out as much as you can by simply talking to and observing your guest. If there are any complications or issues please send a letter to us and you shall have a response as soon as possible. We wish you the best of luck and hope that things will work out well between your human. Your human shall arrive a week from now on Friday, August 8th 1004 A.B." Bon-Bon exhaled deeply after reading the entire letter.
I had to check to make sure my heart didn't stop beating. A human, in our house!? I was shaking from excitement. Was this a dream? As if that wasn't enough the dresses inside had to be the sexiest things I would have ever worn. I noticed Bon-Bon giving me a cautious look. I mustered my best dead serious look and stared her straight in the eyes.
"You do realize that if you say no to this I will be force to kill you right?"
"Lyra, I'm not sure, what if this-"
"I will do it right here too. And then afterwards I'll kidnap one anyway. It's gonna happen."
"Okay. Fine, I suppose it's alright."
"OH HELL YEAH!!!" I roared in excitement. Nothing could possibly ruin this!
"But..." she began. "We have a week until he, or she is here and we are reading these books cover to cover AND you aren't going to molest them the moment they walk through the door."
"Fuuuuuck. There's like over a dozen books in there! And I wouldn't have done that...probably not at least..." I rubbed my hooves together awkwardly.
"By the way I know there's still enough human porn on the computer to last until the end of time. I'd hide that if I were you..." she echoed from the box as she fumbled through the collection of items inside.
"And the toys and what not." she added.
"Action-"
"Not up for discussion."
"Fiiine."
"And if I find another vibrator on the desk I swear to Celestia I will kick your ass from here to the moon." she said in an irritated tone.
It's not my fault we ran out of room in the drawers, where else would I put it?
"When you're done hiding the evidence get back here and start going through these books with me. We can each read half and share the important parts with each other. If we're going to finish these we're going to have to start now." Bon-Bon gestured me over and gave me one of the books she picked out.
"Human anatomy, psychology, and mating rituals?"
"I figured you'd want that one. I got one on cultural norms and history."
"Thanks, Bon-Bon."
"Anyway, better get to it, there's at least a dozen more books in there and only a week to read them."
He'd better be cute at least, especially if I was going to spend a week reading about humans. I never hated books and I went to the library once in a while but I never buried myself in them like Twilight did.
"FINALLY! I finished the last book! About damn time..." I slammed the book cover closed and threw my head back into the arm of the couch I was laying on. "Together that was not a dozen like we thought, noooo, of course there had to be another pile just as big under the dresses!"
"Good timing too. Whoever it is comes in about three hours. Can't believe we've spent the week doing nothing but reading those...my eyes still hurt." Bon-Bon held her head and rather than look for her own seat simply laid on top of me.
"Ahh, get your gigantic ass off of me!" I tried to shove her off but she didn't budge.
"You never told me that while we were in college." She stuck her tongue out and flashed a cheeky grin. I failed to hide my blushing to make matters worse.
"That was a while ago..."
"Barely a year, why did we stop anyway?"
"I don't know, actually I think it was because we were so busy with finals we didn't have time." I confessed.
"Well we have plenty now..." Just as she said that there was a knock at the door. She pulled herself off of me and let me answer the door. I tried my best to hide my excitement, but who could? It was probably our human coming early!
The door opened to reveal Fleetfoot standing in the doorway with a big tray of food and an equally large smile. "Sup bitches!" I had a few classes with Fleetfoot in college so we got to know each other pretty well, especially when we started visiting each other. After college we still kept in contact at least.
"Hey Fleetfoot! What's up? How are you and James?" I asked as I feasted my eyes on the food on the tray. It looked amazing to say the least.
"Oh we're doing great. Though at one point I asked if he wanted to try a three-way and for a second I thought he stopped breathing!" She laughed a little and passed the tray to me.
"Did you mention me???" I asked excitedly.
"Oh I forgot to tell him if it would be a mare or stallion...whoops." She said with an evil grin. "Could be Thunderlane...hehe."
"Actually...that would be hilarious. You have to take a picture of his reaction when he finds out."
"Oh I shall...even better I think Thunderlane might swing both ways..." Her grin widened even further.
"Oh you are evil...I love it!"
"Yep! Well anyway I cooked these up based on what I know James likes in case he doesn't have a taste for pony food, I heard about your human arriving today and I figured this would be great for all three of you."
"Wow, thanks!"
"Sure thing! Anyway I should get back. I gotta find Thunderlane...and maybe some lube. Catch y'all later! Tell Bon-Bon I said hi!"
"I will! See ya!" I waved as she flew off back towards Cloudsdale.
I turned around and as soon as Bon-Bon opened her mouth I told her. "It was Fleetfoot, she told me to say hi and she dropped off some food for us and the human coming later."
"Oh, great! Wait a minute though...I don't think we read the personal file on whoever is coming. I think we meant to but forgot."
I thought about it for a moment before realizing she was right. I set the tray on the coffee table in the living room and found the personal file still laying in the box. I opened it and looked inside.
"Let's see...his name is...Jacob?" Bon-Bon realized the look on my face right away.
"I'm sure it's not the same one you were...I heard that lots of humans end up with the same names. Pinkie told me that David told her he's met several Davids in his life."
"Yeah, I suppose that would make sense. Anyway it looks like he's tall too, he'd be about six feet tall. From the eastern United States, wherever that is. It says he's only 19 years old, but that on Earth humans can live up to just over a hundred but most make it to their 70's or 80's. Wow...that stinks. Ponies can live to be like three hundred or more if they take care of themselves. They have no magic on Earth." I continued reading it and with the memory of all that I read about humanity it seemed like they'd had it pretty rough compared to ponies. Must explain why the ones already here were so eager to stay."
"No kidding. I read most of the stuff on their history and it reminds me a lot of gryphons and dragons, though they live a lot longer than humans too. Gryphons live almost as long as we do and I haven't heard of a dragon dying of old age."
We spent the next few hours mostly reading the rest of the file and speculating on what he was like in person and though we already talked about the books for a painfully long time we discussed anything else that might seem important for the other to know. Apparently humans were more shy when it came to things like sex. I learned from James and Anders that they have a serious thing about wearing clothes though since they'd been here they became more relaxed about it.
Eventually we looked at the clock and noticed it was almost 12:30. Damn...what if he never showed up? Did he get lost? Surely he could find his way here. My worry was broken as I heard a knock at the door, if it was anyone other than him I'm sure they'd understood if I wanted to strangle them. I raced to the door and pulled open the door. For just a moment, I'm pretty sure my heart skipped a beat.
"Hey, are you...Lyra Heartstrings?" He said, looking up from a note he held in his hand. The other was a suitcase on wheels that I guessed held his personal belongings. What really shocked me is how he looked. My eyes widened further as I realized he looked almost exactly like the Jacob Heller I found naked on the computer. A part of me wondered if he was still that big down there...His looks weren't quite as chiseled but he was still handsome and he seemed to have a bit of a tan now. When he wasn't looking I made a promise to myself to delete all damning evidence from the computer.
"H-hey...you must...be Jacob. Heller. House my welcome with Bon-Bon. I said awkwardly as I felt my heart beat rising. I listened to what I said and wanted to cover my mouth. Great, he's not even through the door and probably thinks I'm retarded! Bon-Bon came to the door and though I knew she was every bit as surprised as I was she hid it far better.
"Oh...why hello there...come on in dear..." She said with a slightly seductive look. Note to self, violently strangle Bon-Bon later.
"Thank you, you must be Bon-Bon. Pleased to meet you guys. Is there anywhere I can put these?" He shook the hand with the suitcase. I tried my best to not fantasize about what else he'd do with those.
"Right in my bedroom, here let me get that for you!" She scooped up his suitcase and carried it into her room, where he followed her. He walked in and looked around at the room while Bon-bon leaned against the doorway with a winning grin.
"What the hell? You can't just do that!" I told her, careful to make sure it wasn't loud enough for him to hear.
"Do what my dear Lyra? I'm simply treating our handsome guest how he deserves..." She flashed a wink at me. Oh now it's personal.
"This isn't over, you know he'd fall for me."
"Not if you play the same cards you did when he opened that door."
"I was surprised! It's not fair, I've always had an interest in humans and then you're already strutting your stuff as soon as you see him!" I peeked over into the room to notice Jacob still looking around the room curiously and feeling how soft the bed was. Looking at his reaction it was apparent he thought it was very soft.
"Fine, let's see who can win the boy over, I have more experience."
"Cougar." I told her, she was in fact two years older than me at least.
"Chicken." She responded. "How about this, let's see who can win the boy's heart. You get him to ask you out on a date, you win. I get him to ask me out, I win. Sound fair?"
"Deal." I narrowed my eyes at her.
"Then may the best mare win!" She declared.
"Oh I shall." I smiled back. We shook hooves and shared a look at Jacob as he prepared to exit the room.
"Why you can lay in my bed tonight if you like..." Bon-Bon attacked the opportunity like the cougar she was.
"Slut." I huffed to myself as she guided him back into the room and began to introduce herself further.
You win this round, Bon-bon...now it's my turn. I thought to myself as I began to plan how I would turn this around.
"So...Jacob...tell me about yourself." Bon-Bon whispered as she made circles on the table with her hoof. We had just finished dinner and here she was trying to steal my ma- I mean Jacob. We ate the lasagna that Fleetfoot provided as well as some brownies and the moment we finished she was already trying to get in bed with him. I tried to resist starting into those cool emerald pools he had in place of eyes. The only thing that could distract me was his short, but silky looking black hair.
"Not much to say, played some football in high school. When I wasn't practicing I was often trying to paint or learn to play piano in my spare time." He said with a shrug of his shoulders.
"Oh my...such a strong stallion, I bet you did amazingly at it and an appreciation for the arts too...a rare combo. You must have a dozen mar- girlfriends back home..."
"I...thanks, and no not really. Haven't had a date in at least three months." As soon as he said that I saw Bon-Bon's eyes gleam as if she just found diamonds and she pounced on the opportunity.
"Such a shame...you know you don't have to be alone like that..."
Shit! Move aside bitch!
"Yeah! I mean it's been so long since I've been on a good date myself and Bon-Bon here is sadly into mares. She actually has a crush on the one you see walking around outside!"
"Really?" He said, glancing out the window. When he was distracted I quietly cast a quick mute spell on Bon-Bon, shutting her up while I went in for the kill.
"I didn't see anyone."
"Oh must of just missed her." I said, Bon-Bon practically glaring daggers at me while pointing to her mouth. Her lips were moving but nothing meaningful came out, kinda reminded me of high school teachers.
"What's wrong with Bon-Bon?"
"Oh nothing, she just gets a little nervous sometimes and gets quiet all of a sudden." I smiled, I was doing all I could to not burst out laughing at this point and she looked ready to kill me.
"Ah, that's gotta suck. Well anyway, how are you doing lately?"
"Oh it's been better...some nights just feel so cold and lonely..."
"What about Bon-Bon? You have her to keep you company don't you?"
He can't possibly be this dense...
"Sure...but the house lacks a masculine touch..."
"Oh...well I'm here."
I couldn't help but giggle. "Yes you are. Say, why don't we do something to commemorate your first day here. Let's go to the park!"
"Alright, sure. Lead the way." He answered with a neutral expression.
"Great!" I subtly removed the mute spell from Bon-Bon and seized my lyre from my room. "Let's go!"
If I was lucky, perhaps music would get across the point that words had failed to. On the way to the park I saw a number of ponies out and about with humans accompanying them as well and as could be expected most of the conversations I could hear involved the arrival of humans and everyone's thoughts about them. Not that I really cared with my own sexy human right beside me...
Bon-Bon and I found our usual bench in a relatively secluded area of the park, though today even this section had dozens of folks milling about. As we approached I realized a problem. The bench only ever had enough room for the two of us. Where would my sexy h-I mean Jacob sit? An idea struck me like Bon-Bon's hoof the time she caught my eating all the cookies.
I let Jacob and Bon-Bon share the bench as I stood in front of them with my lyre at the ready.
"Oh cool, how long have you played a harp?" Jacob asked.
"It's a lyre." I said, trying not to sound frustrated. "Actually...I don't even remember when I started. When I was little my mother found that I really loved music. So one birthday she came home with a beautiful new lyre that one of her relatives made just for me...I was just a filly so I didn't quite appreciate it as much as I should have. I did try to play it but it tried to hard to force music. I got frustrated and gave up..."
"But you gave it another try." He said with a soft smile.
"I did." I returned his smile. "It wasn't for a few years but I was cleaning the attic when I found it again. I brushed the dust off and took it out to the park that night when I was feeling really down after a terrible week and I tried my luck at it one more time."
"And you played it beautifully." Bon-Bon commented.
"I didn't know it at the time but she was just around the tree you guys are in front of now." I added.
"It was after a bad break-up and I went to the park to relax for a while...I cried for a little while before falling asleep. As soon as I woke up it was already dark outside and the first thing I heard was someone starting to play an instrument." Bon-Bon recalled.
"I started with a few notes and it became more complex and flowed better."
"That's what you called it?" Bon-Bon grinned. "You poured your soul into that thing! It nearly made me start crying again it was so wonderful."
I blushed and looked away from her and Jacob for a moment. "Thanks Bon-Bon." I looked at Jacob now. "That's actually the story of how I met Bon-Bon as well. When I was finished she came out and complimented the performance and we started hanging out shortly after. It all happened right where you're sitting too. That's why this is our favorite spot."
"Wow...that's amazing." Jacob said in an impressed tone. "Do you think you could play the same song now that you played then?"
I paused for a moment to consider. "Yes. It's been a while though so I might be rusty on this one."
I took a deep breath and started with the first few notes slowly. The song never quite fit into any genre but if any it fit closest to blues. Other than that it was something all its own and the best part was that it was mine, and only mine.
The few gentle notes soon became a one-mare symphony that flowed forth like a river. I didn't focus as hard as I could on my playing, and yet it came perfectly on its own. I closed my eyes and just played away. The minutes slowly rolled along, and before I knew it I had been playing for at least ten minutes. When I opened my eyes a small crowd was gathering around. A moment later the song finally concluded.
My audience applauded for a few long moments before dispersing and going on about their business. Bon-Bon was smiling and Jacob seemed thoroughly awe-struck.
"That's really impressive. Wish I could learn to play like that."
"Thank you. I'm sure you have plenty of talents though."
"Not really." He shrugged. "I do have a few talents but nothing big. I can show you later if you're still interested."
"Alright."
After that our time at the park consisted mostly of Bon-Bon and I sharing stories of things that happened when we were in college or the kind of things we liked to do in our spare time.
Eventually night began to roll around and we returned home. I was left alone with Jacob while Bon-Bon attempted to cook a dish she hoped he would like as well. As we talked I noticed Bon-Bon constantly poking her head out to make sure I wasn't making a move on our guest.
Thankfully it didn't take her long to finish and we were able to eat. The meal consisted of simply potatoes, bread and steamed broccoli, best to start with simple meals to gauge what he likes.
Shortly after we started eating Jacob was the first to start a conversation.
"So what do you guys do for a living exactly?
"I make and sell baked goods and treats." Bon-Bon said.
"I want to make music professionally one day but for now I make money doing art commissions." I said before taking a sip of water.
"Oh cool. I was a famous porn star back home."
Caught completely off-guard, I may or may not have accidentally spit the water out at Bon-Bon. Thankfully for her she had quick reflexes and ducked out of the way. "What!?" I shouted in a high pitched tone.
"Could you provide a demonstration?" Bon-Bon asked with a sneaky grin.
Slut. I was gonna ask that!
While he said it Jacob had maintained a perfectly calm expression, but now I could see just how hard he was trying not to laugh.
"Just kidding!" He burst out laughing. "I worked as a carpenter's assistant for about a year though."
"Heh...sorry. Dinner was amazing by the way." He said as he stretched out his joints. Despite it feeling like we only just sat down I couldn't believe he had completely cleaned his plate.
"You eat fast." Bon-Bon noted.
"I don't usually wolf it down like that, guess I was hungrier than I thought."
Bon-Bon smiled. "Well you ate it. At least someone likes my cooking!" She glared at me.
"Hey! That was only when you tried cooking spicy food!"
"Wuss."
"Sorry if I don't like food that'll burn my mouth."
"And make you cry like a filly." She shot back.
"Ahem...girls? Hey so if you don't mind is it alright if I took a shower? I'm kinda sweaty and you two wouldn't want me to smell up the place."
Can I watch? I thought wishfully.
"No problem. You can strip down and throw your clothes in the hamper. There should be some towels right next to it."
"Oh um...alright." He found his way to the laundry room and made sure to close the door before disrobing. He came out a moment later with a towel that was barely long enough to wrap around his waist, but damn was it still a show when he walked out. Bon-Bon let out a low whistle as he came out. Oh he works out alright.
"Take your time in there, we got plenty of hot water." Bon-Bon added.
I know humans weren't allowed to bring firearms into Equestria but damn was that boy packing heat.
A few long moments later Jacob had shuffled his way into the bathroom, closing the door behind him and starting the water.
"I would ride that fine ass all night long..."
"Pffft, sorry Bons, this one's mine."
"As if. I know this game better than you do."
"Age before beauty is still a thing I suppose." I grinned.
"Good thing I have both."
"Just don't be mad when I win." I crossed my hooves in my lap.
"Oh come on, it's not like we can both have h...him...wait..." She put a hoof to her chin and her eyes widened. "Well...we could..."
"Wait, what are you saying..." My own eyes widened as I caught onto her idea. It was a long-shot but a chance nonetheless. Most of the books we had read suggested that humans were as a rule of thumb, usually monogamous. Equestrians are usually monogamous too but it's not considered strange for more than two to be in a relationship together and is far more accepted in pony society than human society.
"I think we have a game plan in mind..." Bon-Bon cooed, grinning ear to ear.
"But what if one of us got pregnant or something?"
"I don't think he'd be able to...because they're from a whole different world their genes are much different, we might be mammals but we wouldn't be compatible. Also if he had an STD we wouldn't be able to catch it. It would die because it basically wouldn't recognize us as possible hosts."
"Well there's a flip side to it. It'd make treating them with pony medicine a challenge all on its own, though doctors think that over time their bodies will start to adapt to living in Equestria."
"So enjoy it while it lasts?"
"Hell yeah!" She cheered, but not too loudly.
"Alright we need to calm down and think or we could blow it. How are we gonna do this? Just like go up and-"
"Oh no, no. Subtlety my dear Lyra, will take us a long way. We gotta drop hints and tease him a little. We can't be too easy."
"Yeah except like nine out of ten guys never notice any of the "hints" and the ones that do are usually gay."
"Good point...well we can try to be a little more clear then if he's not getting the message.
"Wait! What if he is gay?"
"Buy a strap-on? Invite a stallion?"
"Realistically."
I could only shrug. "I dunno. He might swing both ways. Never know unless we try."
A moment later we heard the water stop and it wasn't long before Jacob stepped out, his towel once again struggling to hold on.
"Well all you gals had to do was ask." He smirked.
"Hello, Luna. How do you think Equestria's new guests are faring?" Celestia welcomed her sister.
"Quite well, Tia. Though tell me, why does it seem like it seems like the vast majority of them are single, young adults?" Luna asked. Celestia couldn't help but smile.
"Oh no reason...but if there is one way to help foster friendly relations..."
"Oh my-Tia! That's just..." Luna began to blush.
"Effective, as far as I can see. I also made sure to have a surplus of ponies trained to marry those that do fall in love."
"That's...one way to do it I suppose...are humans and ponies...compatible?"
"The doctors aren't sure... Well we should know before long." Celestia grinned mischievously.
"I'll give you ten bits to drop the towel!" I blurted out.
"Deal." And despite what I expected, Jacob's towel dropped.
I'm almost certain my brain blew a fuse right then because I could not formulate words for the life of me.
"Well shit!" Bon-Bon said in surprise. I walked closer for a better look after my mind started working again
"Ah ah! You can look but not touch." He grinned and spun in a slow circle, showing off the goods.
I would bite into that ass like an apple...
"Now that's just cruel." I huffed in mock frustration. Though in reality I was more than a little shocked that he actually did it.
"I'm not that easy you know." He put the towel back on.
"Just cheap then." Bon-Bon raised an eyebrow.
"Nope. Just a tease."
"Oh, yeah because we're totally interested in you." She said in a sarcastic voice.
"You're still looking down so..."
"Ah! Was not! Lyra?"
"Huh? Yeah, sure. What she said." I snapped out of my daydream fantasy.
"So...what now?" Bon-Bon scratched idly at the floor.
"We could try a nice dinner date." I suggested
"But aren't most humans monogamous?" Bon-Bon looked to Jacob.
"If you two are fine with it I have no issues." He shrugged.
"Well we just ate but what about breakfast tomorrow?" Bon-Bon suggested.
"Sounds good...maybe we should get some sleep...first day in an entirely new universe is kind of a lot to soak in..." Jacob added with a muffled yawn.
After a "calm and reasonable" argument about which room Jacob was more welcome to sleep in, Jacob himself decided to sleep on the couch to avoid "a potentially apocalyptic" feud. Bon-Bon and I instead agreed to sleep in her room and let Jacob sleep in mine so I could make sure she would keep her grubby hooves off Jacob...though she said it was the other way around. Just to be sure though I may have tied one of her hooves to the bed post...
"When you want it the most there's no easy way out-" I woke up to hear someone singing. I glanced over to Bon-Bon whom was still napping. Nope, not her. I slipped quietly from bed and followed the sound to my room. It sounded like there was music being played with it. I cracked open the door and peeked inside. The first thing I saw was Jacob sitting on the edge of the bed with a device in hand listening to music from it. It didn't take long for him to notice me as well.
"Oh! Hey Lyra! Sorry, I didn't realize how well sound carried in here. Hope I didn't wake you guys up." He shut the device off and shrugged.
I put a hoof to my mouth and yawned. "It's alright. Bon-Bon could sleep through a hurricane anyway...she has actually. Who were you listening to anyway? I've only heard a bit of Earth music thus far. It's a bit different, but pretty incredible. I know Vinyl damn near had a heart attack when she saw some of Earth's music libraries."
"Oh um...Celine Dion. Yeah...anyway it is pretty cool to see the cultural exchange going on."
"It is. It's just so much to take in for either side. I can't even begin to imagine what it'll look like ten years from now." I sat down on the bed beside him and wondered aloud. "I know you're still new here but where do you think you'll be in ten years?"
"Heh, if I try to take this all in at once my head might explode. Well I'll have to earn my keep at some point but Equestria has nothing but job opportunities. It's ridiculous. And with both our worlds able to open a portal to other worlds and universes and stuff? Whew! That'll kick off the biggest economic and cultural boom in history easily. I am really excited to see what the future holds for humanity, as well as Equestria and everywhere else near it."
"Yeah, though you gotta wonder what else that could bring. It could cause problems in ways we might not see right now. But what I wanted to ask was more specifically tailored to you. What does Jacob Heller picture himself doing ten years from now if he is still in Equestria?"
"I'm not quite sure...I sure hope I'm still on good terms with you and Bon-Bon. Maybe I could get an interesting job here. Kinda wanna work with some gryphons at some point. I always thought black-smithing would be something I'd like to learn but if that doesn't work I have a bit of carpentry experience too."
"Oh wow. That's kinda cool. Hell maybe I could go with you if you visit the Gryphon Kingdoms. Believe it or not I've always had a thing for archery. Not just that I mean I would like if I could create a bow and some arrows from scratch and use them."
"Nice. Well who says we'd have to wait ten years? After breakfast we could try to find out more about it for the future. It would be good to at least know where to go." He suggested.
"Yeah, you're right. But anyway I wanted to bring it up while I had the chance."
"Alright, bring what up?"
"I know things here have gone kinda fast, I mean you haven't even been here a full twenty-four hours. I hope Bon-Bon and I aren't being too forward or seem y'know... "easy". I don't want you to feel uncomfortable and I wanted to establish now that if you do start to feel that way it's alright and we'll give you some breathing room. You shouldn't feel pressured about anything. We're from two different worlds after all so some things might appear different." I confessed. "And if the three of us don't work out I just hope we can all still live together.
He seemed to pause for a moment before smiling and looking back at me. "Thanks. I appreciate it. And you two are good don't worry. It is going faster than how this kind of thing would go on Earth but at least you guys know what you want and make that known. Back on Earth, holy crap you would not believe how many mind games some girls back home like to play. It's maddening and really this is a nice change of pace."
I couldn't help but laugh a little. "Well that's a relief. And I understand your pain. Guys here can be frustrating because they can be so damn oblivious! Stallions are so dense!"
"I'll have to take your word for it. Not much into stallions." He smirked.
"So anyway what are you-" I began until a great monstrous roar echoed from Bon-Bon's room.
"Ow! Damn it! LYRA!"
"Oh shit. Hide me. Hide me now" I frantically searched for a place to hide from the wrath of Bon-bon.
"Quick. Behind the pillows. I'll lean against them to make in convincing." He suggested. I slipped behind the pillows and he laid against them. Only a moment later did Bon-Bon charge with a wild, angry look on her face. I carefully tucked a pillow to cover the spot over my face.
"Where is she!?"
"I think she's in the kitchen. What'd she do anyway?"
"She tied me to the bucking bedpost! That led to me smacking headfirst into the floor!" I had to bite my tongue to stop from laughing at that image. I could practically hear the scowl she threw his way before tearing through the rest of the room like a hurricane.
"You're in on this I know it." She said, probably scolding Jacob.. "Lyra!" She stomped on the floor and carefully looked around again.
Then I accidentally shook the pillows I was hiding behind with a prodigiously loud sneeze. "Shit" Before Bon-Bon could react I leaped out and bolted through the door with the crazed mare in tow. Jacob waited patiently before following us out to make sure there wouldn't be any murders today.
Somehow within the span of about three seconds the couch had been over-turned, as had the table. Bon-Bon was in the center of the room covered in some kind of strange goo while trying to jab me with a broom while I hanged from what appeared to be a remarkably strong ceiling fan.
"Does this kind of thing happen often?" He asked incredulously
"Usually a couple times a month." Bon-Bon answered without looking away.
A moment later there was a knock at the door. Everyone stopped and looked towards the door. "Just a minute!" Bon-Bon answered.
"Alright! This the home of Lyra and Bon-Bon?" The feminine voice called. Jacob's eyes seemed to widen in recognition.
"Wait a minute..." He whispered cautiously.
"Yes it is! Here, let me open the door." A moment later Bon-Bon turned the handle and the door swung inwards to reveal a young woman standing in the door way with a single, large red suitcase in tow. Immediately her eyes darted towards Jacob. She looked at him in much the same way a lion might look at a gazelle.
"Oh fuck."
"JACOB!" In an incredible burst of speed and agility she appeared to dive clear across the living room and tackled him in a hug. The wind was knocked out of him and they both tumbled to the floor. Her long, dark hair could only barely conceal her bright green eyes and wide smile.
"Hey Jacob." From out the corner of his eye he must have noticed me giving him the death glare as I slowly spun around, clinging to the ceiling fan. Until I started slipping at least.
"Oh no." A thud followed immediately after, followed by me ever-so graciously attempting to regain balance. A few shaky steps later and I was starting beside Jacob and his "friend" on top of him. "Jacob...do you know her?" I whispered to him.
"Yeah. This is Samantha...Samantha Heller..." I explained. She stood up off of him and waved to me.
"You have a WIFE!?" I yelled in surprise. In the blink of an eye she flashed a grin at Jacob.
"Oh yes...come on honey...surely there's somewhere we can be alone..." She said with a smirk. He groaned as I stared at the two of them in disbelief. How could he have not told us he was already with someone!?" Behind me I could faintly pick up the sound of Bon-Bon laughing.
"Not quite...she's my older sister..." He said in a flat tone.
"Buzzkill." Samantha pouted.
Oh...yeah I can see how they might look similar...I thought to myself. "What are you doing here anyway?" I asked suspiciously.
She smiled and swept the hair from in front of her eyes. "I'm gonna stay here with y'all!" She cheered. "Well...if you'll agree to have me anyway..." She coughed awkwardly into her fist.
Lyra and I exchanged awkward glance.
"That's um...pretty abrupt to be honest." Bon-Bon said uncomfortably.
"Yeah. I have to agree with Bon-Bon. We're easy-going but a heads up would have been nice." I rubbed the back of my neck and avoided eye contact. "I thought it was only supposed to be one human per host. Isn't it?"
"There's nothing against it but it's usually like that. The family I got assigned to had just had a kid-er foal and I felt like a stranger there at the same time might just cause tension...plus I would really like to be near someone I know until I get situated, like my brother." The excitement and energy Samantha had displayed initially really seemed to wane and show a slightly more reserved side of her although underneath she just seemed to hum with life. "You have no real reason to say yes but I would appreciate it greatly and of course I'd carry my own weight.
"Well..." Bon-Bon began. "It's not so much that we mind you staying, but there's only 3 bedrooms. You could certainly split it with Jacob if he doesn't mind."
She cracked a smile and glanced at Jacob. "What do ya' say? Come on, it'll be just like when we were kids...minus the cat though."
"Man, I miss Gollum right about now." He sighed and looked at the ceiling. "But yeah, if they're fine with it I can't argue."
"Yay!" She cheered and hugged him. "I'll give you a chance to change into something while I chat with our hosts." Jacob chuckled and hugged her in return before wandering back into the room they would be sharing.
"Gollum?" I asked, glancing expectantly at both Jacob and Sam.
"Huh? Oh he's just the cat we had when we were kids. Named after a character in a movie. Jacob picked it because the cat didn't chew his food too much before he swallowed so he'd cough it back up sometimes and it sounded like the character Gollum coughing. And thus the name."
"Oh. Okay. So um what happened to him?"
"He um...had to be put to sleep. He made it to a nice old age for cats at least. He made it to like fourteen before he started getting sick all the time. He was a bit quirky but Jacob especially loved him." She glanced towards the room he was in. "I missed him sure be it seemed to hit Jacob pretty hard. That was a few years ago.
"We're sorry to hear that." Bon-Bon chimed in. I remember the cat my family had when I was small. Timber always found ways to cause mischief but he never bothered me. He was my little partner is crime when it caused to making trouble." She said with a soft laugh."
"My dad used to have a falcon." I raised a hoof. They flashed me an odd look.
"Why a falcon?" Samantha asked with a tilt of her head.
"Well thing is he was going on a hike with his friend once and they found this injured falcon. He decided to take it home and nurse it back to health. While he did he said he began to really bond with it. Has always had a thing for falcons since. One he has now is named Varren." I thought back to the time the bird tried to land on my horn. He was friendly sure, though a bit clingy. "My dad always got a little lonely while writing."
"Oh yeah...I remember now!" Bon-Bon said with wide eyed look. "Wasn't that around when your mom was taking those cooking classes?"
"Hm" I nodded. "Though that's not the reason. He said that he couldn't focus while my mom was in the room with him writing, that they'd always spend the whole time talking instead whereas he could ramble off all day to the falcon and stay focused."
"Cool! So what kind of stories does he write?" Samantha perked up.
"Adventure and romance novels at first. Though lately he's drifted a bit more towards mystery." My mom proof-reads too and helps with editing.
"That's awesome! Think I might be able to read one of his books?." Samantha tilted her head.
"Oh sure! In fact I've got copies of most of his books tucked away somewhere. I'll show you sometime later tonight."
Just as Samantha opened her mouth to speak Jacob walked out of his room with a new set of clothes.
"I can't believe at least half of your shirts are still collared." Samantha burst out laughing.
"I look good in collared shirts..." He protested.
"Yeah. Cuz that's why you started wearing them."
"What's so odd about collared shirts?" I asked Samantha.
"Nothing really. He started wearing them years ago so our mom wouldn't see all the hickeys his girlfriends used to leave on him. Jacob Heller! The breaker of hearts! The desire of all women! The- Bahahaha! I can't do it!" She bent over laughing. After several minutes of the back and forth mocking that seemed iconic of all siblings Samantha eventually broke it off and drifted into the room she'd be sharing with her brother to unpack and settle in a bit.
"Well...I don't know about y'all but I'm going to bed." Bon-Bon yawned. "Behave you two. Remember we're going out for breakfast tomorrow morning so don't stay up too late." She waved before going to her own room.
With the others two taking care of their own business Jacob and I sat around in the living room discussing anything that came to mind. We bounced between a myriad of topics such as his first thoughts when he met a pony and my first thoughts upon seeing a human. Although there was a vast amount of differences, there were a striking number of similarities once boiled down to roots.
I can't be sure all what we discussed because before I knew it we both started to doze off. My last memory of the night was talking to him about science fiction movies from his world before drifting off to sleep, curled up beside him on the couch.
