> Great power comes in Small packages
>  by Izalith
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Wake up and smell the gil!
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

	"Ul'Dah, the greatest city in all of Hydaelyn, this magnificent metropolis of sandstone and marble is the commercial hub of Eorzea and with good reason. Its reputation as the wealthiest city in all of Eorzea as it has pretty much anything that you can ask for! Walk among our stalls in the market district and you will see it all, beautiful gemstones, priceless silken garments, potent potables, and so much more. Our mighty stone walls boasts the best protection this city can offer, you can see the walls from malms away and that deters would-be raiders cause, honestly, would want to attack something that can't be scaled without being sent back down screaming to the hard dirt? Our precious city was built around the dome-shaped citadel that lies in the heart of Ul'Dah and each ring is divided by the towering walls and battlements that serves as our shield and armor against those that would try to remove us from our home."

"Everything that you can see in the market stalls all come from our hardworking disciplines of the hand, these people are the blood that helps pump life into the veins of Ul'Dah, these people of all races work hard to become the masters of science and nature of alchemy, or to be able to weave from fiber to thread and thread to cloth and so on and so forth as the weavers, or if your more into dealing with delicate metals and gemstones then our goldsmiths is where it all happens on their grindstones and specialized hammers. And I know you may be wondering where does our alchemists and goldsmiths get all of their respectable materials to even create such extravagant wares? Well from our discipline of the land, the miners! These hard working men and women of all races are responsible for finding, excavating and handling the mineral wealth here in Ul'Dah, be it precious stones, ores, fossils or something that has yet to be discovered! And how do our miners receive their training techniques? Why, by undertaking a large field of tasks ranging from constant prospecting of most minute elements to large-scale civil engineering!"

"If our crafters are the blood and bones of Ul'Dah then our Gladiators and Pugilists are its skin and muscles. Fighting on the front lines on the Thanalan desert or fighting for fame and glory in the arena who fight with sword and shield, an impressive feat when they are wearing metal armor all the time but when you need someone to take the hit for you from a barrage of arrows or from a beast's talons then you will know who to call upon. If fighting with a sword and shield is not your style then fighting with the metal, bone or leather on your fists is your thing then our Pugilist league! The arts of hand-to-hand combat is one riffled with incessant training of the body and mind, the ability to unleash flurry after flurry of blows is something that only they can master! As for what they wear to protect themselves, they don't even bother with the heavy stuff since their mobility is what makes them a dangerous threat when fighting, they need to be light on their toes to come in close to deliver the one-two knock punch to win the day!"

"And lastly we have our minds and spirits of Ul'Dah, the Thaumaturgists! These brave magic wielders use the very latent aether inside of them to cast spells and curses upon those that crosses their path! This school of magic is a force of terrifying destructive capabilities that one mustn't abuse for it can destroy yourself if you are too careless with it. To even mold the power that is thaumaturgy one must have a medium to turn the aether into sorcery such as a simple scepter or a big staff which must have a magical natural stone at its source to help control the flow of energy within you. Once you are armed with such magical apparatus you can send forth magical doom and destruction upon those that would dare harm you or your friends!

"So tell me buddy, is this everything you have come to expect of Ul'Dah or what?"

"Momodi....I am finally home!"

"Excellent! Now just follow me to the Quicksand Inn and I can get you all sorted out before you can start your life as an adventurer, just have to get your room and board set up and your name registered and before you know it your name will be remembered as someone of great importance!"


POOF!


"Tata! Tata wake up!" shouted an angry voice from outside my room, the knocking that was going on only grew louder as I maintained my will to sleep.

"Urg...five more minutes Momodi..." mumbled my sleepy voice, my body still tired and sore from yesterday's adventure.

"If you don't wake up right now Tata then I will get Barb in here and let her wake you up!" the voice on the other side of the door shouted again as I grumbled and moaned before rolling over on the bed, facing away from the door.

"Just...five more minutes of sleepy times..." I groaned out before falling back asleep, my pleasant dream of Ul'Dah interrupted by my caretaker/employer.

Once the sound of knocking was gone I let out a happy sigh of relief, my mind going back to the beautiful scene of the Quicksand Inn, the proprietress Momodi was busy writing my name, age and other important information in her ledger. Hopping onto a nearby bar stool and peering over the side to see what else she was writing but all I got was a quill to the face.

"If you don't get up now I'll give you a big kiss." and before I had a chance to back up the proprietress lunged forward and grabbed my face before forcing me into a kiss with her. It wasn't bad at all, sure it was sudden and forceful but her lips was so warm and that her tongue was long and...and...

Wait a minute.

Opening my eyes immediately I was face-to-face with my kisser, Barbara the Dragoness, or just Barb to her friends which somehow includes me. My reaction was to immediately push Barb back while myself was falling backwards, over the side of the bed, go head first onto the floor and give myself a bump and a headache all in one go. Pulling myself off the floor and with one hand cradling my head to rub away the pain I saw that Barb was sitting on my bed, a dopey blushing grin on her face as her tail waggled from side to side slowly like some cat found the bowl of cream.

"Barbara! What did I tell you about knocking! You must always knock when you enter my room! And also why did you kiss me while I was sleeping!" I shouted, my face red from both being angry at Barb for the surprise kiss and from the blush of me kissing a female dragon, something that no one back home or in the Free Company has ever done before.

"But Tatalito, Twilight told me to come wake you up since you weren't doing it yourself so I just improvised." Barb said in her innocent voice, her hands behind her back as she stood on my bed and was moving side to side slowly and in a playful manner.

"By kissing me!" I said back, my voice not as loud as before but still in the range of pissed off and raging. I stood up and started to look around for my staff, the one thing that Barb is afraid of is me turning her into a block of ice and since she is cold-blooded that is pretty much my only deterrent against the dragoness.

"Don't act like you didn't like it, I can see the blush on your face." she said with a grin, my eyes widening a bit before quickly putting my hand into my satchel, grasping around for something to toss at the amused small dragon.

"I am not blushing it is just...just...just the heat is all!" I said before finally grabbing something that is round and slightly rough, not entirely sure what it is I only mentally shrugged before slowly pulling it out to get it ready to throw at the bothersome lizard.

"It's only six in the morning." Barb said with a smirk on her face, crossing her arms in a triumphant pose only to duck out of the way of a thrown La Noscean Orange, said orange sailed through the air and hit the side of the wall, not exploding upon impact but instead just leaving an orange circle on the wall before falling to the floor with a soft thud.

"Just get out of my room!" I shouted before reaching back down into my satchel for another orange.

"Oh and one more thing, your in your underwear." was all that Barb said before I threw another La Noscean Orange at her, the second one entering the hallway and same as the first one did not break upon hitting the wall and the floor.

Sighing in relief that the little troublemaker is gone I let out my customary large yawn while stretching, the sounds of my bones popping and cracking filled my room and before long everything was silent except for the sounds of birds chirping outside and the occasional early morning pony trotting about.

'I swear that dragon is going to be the death of me...'

Going over to the door to my room I closed it gently and then locked it to prevent any future break-ins by one Barbara the Dragoness of House Sparkle, that little bugger caused me enough trouble, especially when she ate my grade five dark matter, that thing was hard to find out in the field and mining was even more troublesome with beasts roaming about. Sure she spat it out and said it tasted like dirt and feet, but its the principle that counts, you just don't go around eating other peoples things without their permission, especially if it is something as important and hard-to-acquire dark matter.

'What did I do to deserve such a punishment?'

As I thought that I started to put on my clothes that I first wore in Ul'Dah, my Lalafellin tunic, gaskins, wrist guards, and top boots, all in pristine condition and dyed black to match my black mage attire. Once I had my clothes on did my possible reason to being sent to this land dawn upon me like a meteor coming down onto a Sahagin camp.

'Oh...right...I ignored the invitation to the party in the palace at Ul'Dah...an invitation from the sultan no less...wow I am an idiot.'

Facepalming myself in failure to realize it sooner I let out a sigh of shame and defeat, my fellow Thaumaturgists and Black Mages are probably laughing at me and rolling in their graves for my tragic mistake. Reaching into my satchel I pulled out my first thaumaturgist scepter, the weathered old stick with a stone at the end has seen better days and so have I but we must make do with what we have, after all my Stardust Rod Zenith is nicely stored in my satchel which makes me wonder how an adventurers satchel is even able to carry so much crap and not burst from being overstuffed. I mean seriously, how can I managed to shovel in a couple hundred pounds of metal ore into something that weights only five pounds?

Putting the satchel around my shoulders and putting my top boots on till they are tight and snuggle and my scepter was hanging loosely on my belt and with that I opened my door and went out only to go face first into a sea of warm purple fur.

'Who turned out the lights?'

"Sorry about that Tata, umm breakfast is ready?" Twilight Sparkle said as she nervously laughed a bit and backed up before turning back and went down the stairs, my eyes transfixed on her 'cutie mark', a six edged star with five more near the central one, those so called marks are supposed to be ones life calling but to me I believe in that you can be anything you want as long as you have the time, patience and energy to do more then one job.

Rolling my eyes at the pony's cutie mark policy of 'one mark=one job' I went down the stairs, having no trouble since the stairs was perfect for a Lalafell of my size, and that the hand rail was also perfect. This tree house would be perfect for Lalafells everywhere since it fits perfect to our size, enough room for us to run about and the basement is perfect for me to do my research and botany. Once me and Twilight have reached the kitchen, the sweet smell of pancakes and toast filled the air and assaulted my nose, the oh so tasty smell was enough for me to start drooling but seeing how Twilight was giving me a grin and that Barb was grinning as well but was more along the lines of being seductive, which might have worked if she was Momodi and was wearing an apron that said 'Kiss the Chef' but sadly all I get are these two knuckleheads.

"So...Tata-" Twilight said but I cut her off, my teaching years finally being put to some use.

"My name is Tatalito, Tata, not Lito, and Nald'thal forbid that you use my last name again." I said, slightly irritated that Twilight has yet to use my actual name instead of these nicknames. I am an instructor on the art of thaumaturgy for Ramuh's sake not some lowly student that can't grasp the fundamentals of ice magic!

"Alright then, Tatalito, who do you plan on taking to the Gala this year?"

"The what? You know I have only been here for a week Twilight Sparkle, and you have yet to explain to me what this 'Gala' is along with the purpose of the two gold tickets that came to me in the mail yesterday." I said while eating my pancakes and toast, the latter being buttered a bit more then normal since dry toast isn't really my thing, need something on it since they don't have Rolanberry Jelly.

"Sorry, forgot that you weren't from around here. Well then the Grand Galloping Gala is an once a year event that takes place all the way in Canterlot and it is always held in the gardens of the royal palace and everypony that is anypony will be there."

"Sooo, basically it is one giant party and gathering with the most wealthy and influential beings of the country come to talk about boring nonsense and flash their money to see who is the big shot pony. Am I not correct?"

"Well...no, not exactly but still it is an honor to even receive a ticket let alone another for a date!"

"Ha ha, no, not going."

"What! But why not?"

"Because young Sparkle, I have been to many like this 'Gala' before back home, all of them were boring, all of them had rich people trying to bribe me to join their side, and a creepy sultan that tried to get into my pants when she had way to much Cooking Sherry." I said, remembering that one time the poor girl got so drunk that when she finally got me alone with her it well...it all went down hill from there. I was just lucky that one of her bodyguards found us before things got out of hand.

Shaking her head Twilight just sighs and goes back to eating, Barb finished washing the dishes that was used to cook our breakfast and was enjoying her own little pile of gems and pancakes. Something I did not know that dragons did was consume gemstones, I thought they only consumed meat and plants but when I saw Barb take a large bite out of a ruby that she found growing out of the ground and not break any of her teeth, that little bit surprised the hell out of me.

'Note to self, keep all squishy bits of myself away from her teeth.'

"Well sorry to say this Tatalito but you are required to go to the Gala."

"Why am I required to leave the comfortableness of this tree home to go three malms into the distance, one-eighth a malm up a mountain and barely a tenth of a malm to a palace just to show to the country of Equestria 'Hey look at me, the new race that your princess's sister brought over on accident when she was still the biggest evil since the elder primals.'. In all seriousness though Twilight Sparkle, I am refusing to go because the one that brought me here is still not in chains nor is she rotting in a dungeon for almost killing all life on the planet by bringing an eternal night. That plan would have never worked without thinking of ways to keep the day and night balanced, a way to generate heat with the new lunar/solar phases and a way to prevent a rebellion from breaking out." I said as I took a bite out of my toast, enjoying the rich flavor of rye and wheat with butter, it is not the same as Rolanberry Jelly but still it comes close to it, maybe if I had some tart berries.

"Sorry Tatalito but Princess Celestia's word is final, your going and that's that." Twilight said and with a small triumphant grin she finished her breakfast before levitating her dishes to the sink, dropped it in and went off to her library to get started on whatever thing she has working on.

Rolling my eyes at Twilight's response, my end of the year plan seems to have been canceled for a party with the rich snobs of a city that only cares for the wealthy. My plan was to get drunk, get dizzy, and pass out with at least five bottles of Cooking Sherry and wake up somewhere in the quiet little town in my pants and boots. Grabbing today's newspaper from the counter-top I moved from my little spot in the kitchen, shuffled around the floating books in the library, and moved down the stairs into the basement and when I got to my workstation I found that my flower boxes were filled with tiny sprouts, plants from back home.

Walking over to workstation number one, the twelve six-by-three flower boxes held different samples of weaver's seeds, four of them were Moko Grass, both their normal conditions and in their high quality breed, next was four seed patches of Cotton Boll, both normal and high quality, Flax was next and with a small smile I gently watered the twelve batches of weaver's seeds, the more advanced seeds are being kept safe within a small wooden box underneath my bed for future storage. I know that my Moko Grass will be used for my future clothing samples, I heard that Rarity is a clothespony and that she is the best in her business so maybe I could trade some secrets that I learned from the Weaver's Guild for some tips and maybe supplies for my own small projects.

Writing down the progress of the first station I moved over to the second which held some of my culinary seeds, mostly Kukuru Bean and Cloves for half the box, the second half is filled with Faerie Apples and La Noscean Oranges, both of them being planted with high quality seeds since I want to enjoy the taste of juicy apples and oranges without having to pay for them.

The last box held something from the Gridanian forest of Black Shroud, I heard their nuts were good but when I tried their walnuts and chestnuts I knew that I had to have more, and so now their seeds rest within this last box, hoping to grow into fine trees.

Grow my pretties, grow big and strong for me, I want to be able to cook and eat you all one day. Hopefully before Twilight uproots any of you and earns a Flare to the face. Just like that one pony that I blasted when I first got here...what was her name again...Black Snooty?

Going back to all the stations I placed the fire cluster crystals above the plants, using them as improvised suns to give light and warmth to my little plants and after a few seconds of the light hitting my babies I saw the little leafy greens all twitch a bit before waving side to side happily. How did I know they were happy, well when your a botanist you learn these things.

I do hope they grow fast enough before the Gala cause I am not going if I have to miss my plants for a few hours cause of what one pony said.

Yawning to myself and checking the small clock that I had repaired I saw that it was already 3 PM I saw that I should give myself a small cat nap, seeing how that my botany work is tiring and since I wasn't interrupted by Barb or Twilight to come up for lunch I guess I can forgo to the outside world and use what bits I have earned by giving that apple farmer some seeds of the Faerie Apples and Mirror Apples, and here is hoping that the orange farm mare can make those trees grow fast so we can sell the new brands of apples to Equestrian markets here, forty percent of the profit sounds nice since its their lands my apples are growing on so that was ten percent which also covered keeping bugs and pests off of it and watering it.

Climbing back upstairs I opened the door to my room and locked the door and without even taking off my top boots I leap onto my bed, roll over and just start snoozing. Sadly my snoozing didn't last long as I heard the front door to the tree house get forced open and the mixed shouting and yelling voices soon found its way to my room, my left eye cracking open before turning to the door to my room. 

"Oh...oh no, those ponies better not be fighting over two stupid gold tickets to a stupid party. I did not escape one hell just to enter another." I nearly shouted as I hopped out of bed, put on my Black Mage uniform, placed my giant black cap on my head and pulled out my Stardust Rod from my satchel and with an angry thought the door to my room just burst into flames before being reduced into a pile of ashes, my arm slightly pointed to the door and my staff angled directly at it.

Crap...I owe Twilight a new door...

Growling at the sight of the ash pile I stormed downstairs and before I know it I saw the girls arguing with among themselves over who would get the other ticket and go with Twilight to the Gala, so I did the most sensible thing I could do at the moment. I silently and calmly walked over to Barb, pulled her aside, found a piece of paper, ink well and quill then quickly wrote to Celestia with the two golden tickets attached to the scroll. What I wrote was simple.

"Dear Princess Celestia"
"I am writing to you on such a short notice because your student is currently having a hard time trying to decide which of her five friends will go to the Gala with her this year, and because of her indecision to pick one of them to go they have taken it upon themselves to try and bribe their way to earn that ticket. I do not know how long this shenanigan has been going on but it must come to an end. I am sending back her two tickets in the hopes that if she can not come up with a viable pony to go with her to your rich party. I am also sending back my two tickets as well because plainly, I am not going for any reason whatsoever, secondly because if I even sense it being a trap you will have to deal with a hailfire storm and I rather not end up in a dungeon because I am going against my will."
"PS: If I see Nightmare Moon or Luna or whatever her name is, I will blast her again with Flare till she is nothing but ashes or she apologizes for insulting my people and myself."

Nodding at my letter I passed it over to Barb who gave a quick look over and with a great puff of green flame the letter turned into a cloud of green dust and flew out a nearby open window and went straight to Canterlot.

"My business here has been concluded. Now if any of you blockheads want to keep fighting over a damn ticket then do so outside, its my three o'cloak nap time and I need my rest. Good day to you girls." I said and with a happy grin I turned around and before I was even half way up the stairs before Barb let out an unladylike belch, blushing slightly before handing the letter to Twilight who didn't know anything about the letter I had sent.

As Twilight started to read the letter I saw that she was smiling quite widely, her smile only grew larger as her horn glowed brighter then before to reveal that instead of two tickets that came with the original letter this morning, she pulled out and into the view of everyone in the room to see six golden tickets, one for each of them. What I did not expect to happen next was that Twilight then pulled out two extra tickets and said aloud what else was on the letter for me to hear.

"And Twilight, these two tickets are for your sister Barb and for your friend Tatalito Yayalito, I know that he does not want to go to the Gala but it is mandatory that he shows up, the first reason is that Luna apologizes to him for insulting him and the Lalafell race, secondly for Tatalito to make himself known to the archmage and principal of the school for gifted unicorns as we have much to learn about his home and where he came from, lastly Tatalito must try to enjoy himself at the Gala."

"PS: Tatalito Yayalito must be in his black uniform that he arrived in since he said that is his symbol of his office."

God damn it...

Sighing out loud for all of them to hear I grab the ticket that Twilight held close to my head, the one eye that everyone can see is clearly glaring at Twilight, my mood now ruined because of the solar princess practically invoking her power over me to come to the Gala just to show me off.

I hate being shown off to other people. Just because a Lalafell managed to become great and powerful doesn't mean you need to parade us around, you just might get more then you bargained for.

Looking at my gil purse I saw that everything was still right where I left them and after hearing from Twilight that since our coins are practically made from the same thing and weigh the same so they are of equal worth. That and one gil is worth one bit and the same backwards, that and it a few ponies seem to want my gil since its a collectible. Not often that money from another dimension comes to your doorstep and wants to be spent on necessities and other items of value. 

Once I am back to my room I went over to the window and took off my hat and placed it on my bed, my eyes scanning the town as a pony or two look up to see me standing there, only able to see my head and the ones that are nice to me stopped and waved, the ones that still haven't warmed up to me just give a cautious stare before going back on their way.

Grabbing my hat from my bed one last time I went back down the stairs, the six mares talking to one another about what they are going to do at the Gala since they all got a ticket, Barb was busy giving me those big heart eyes and without even giving her a stare back I went out the front door, closed it behind me and with a sad sigh I went straight to the nearest coffee shop, my body needing the sweet blend of equestrian coffee before I set something on fire because of my short temper.

I wonder what Dizzy is up to right now...that yellow bird better not be getting himself into trouble again.
> Lazy Season
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	The Moonbucks Cafe was nicely placed next to Sugarcube Corner, the coffee shop is a nice place to get your coffee and small coffee snacks which was small cookies and whatever else goes great with such an excellent flavor. This establishment is nice, for being operated by ponies that is, at first I thought it was going to be slightly dirty but the sight of the two unicorns that run the place easily and efficiently cleaning it proved that they can both run their business and maintain it. That and they make one mean cup of black coffee, just one sip was enough to wake me up and another two was enough to keep me active for an hour or two, depending if I went for regular or extra strength.

Smiling smugly to myself I took a single sip from my small cup, the coffee sitting within was black as the darkest void and tasted bitter and yet it had the power to give me the strength to fully wake up or in this case in the late afternoon calm me down. Sitting down near the front of the coffee house I enjoyed my cheaply bought cup of joe, for three gil a cup, which here is the cheapest I have ever seen since back home it was fifty gil. Letting out a happy sigh I took another sip and stared out the front door of the establishment, my eyes skimming about the ponies walking outside, most of them waved at me and even more cooed at me and said I looked adorable. Now don't get me wrong I like the compliments but when they constantly have to say that I look adorable and hugs me and then asks me where my parents are, that just infuriates me. Just because Lalafells have a childlike appearance and that our height never leaves past three-four feet we are always the butt end of a few jokes and even more at the end of a few cruel and unusual puns for us being tiny lovers, then came these ponies. Ever since I showed up I have been hearing nothing but these ponies asking me if I am lost and need to find my parents, if I need a hug for always being grumpy or just plain laughing at me, saying that I did not blow up Nightmare Moon on the night of the Summer Sun Celebration.

My reaction varied from pony to pony in this town, a few mares that cooed at me for being adorable I can tolerate, the few ponies that asked me where my parents are I told them like the rest, they are resting comfortable in their home at Horizon in the western section of Thanalan. And then there are those that insult me for saying that I crippled Nightmare Moon for the Elements of Harmony to completely defeat her, those that make fun of me for that, I just give them a choice, to find out the hard way on how I defeated that black alicorn witch or to just accept the fact that I defeated her to the point where she can be permanently sealed away.

Most choose the hard way.

Staring down at my cup of coffee I take another sip, relishing in the rich flavor I sink into my cushion that I picked in the store, the soft silky fabric was nice and the gentle breeze of the afternoon reminded me of my many times at both the Quicksand Inn and The Walking Sands tavern, both times I sat upon a cushion just like this, sipping on grape juice that I made and listening to the stories of adventure my friends had accomplished while I was busy teaching the new thaumaturgists the fundamental lessons on how to properly channel the aether within their core and control it to the point where they can cast magic. Every day for three weeks a month I work under the guildmaster Cocobuki and his four brothers, and during those three weeks I would take the students out in the field to test their magical capabilities and luck would have it a few of them would catch on quickly to my teachings but fail in maintaining perfect concentration and nearly set me on fire, freeze me or give me a static charge before going back to the classroom to learn on how to do better next time.

I can still remember the day I arrived here to this landmass as if it was yesterday and everything that transpired that night is fresh as a summer rose. Sighing sadly to that thought I was taken away from my comfortable position as a thaumaturgist instructor all because one pony couldn't hold her own in a battle against six mares that were half her size, strength, and magic capabilities.

I bet I am going to have to retell that story at the Gala...maybe I could get lucky and have Nightmare Moon be there to take another Flare since she oh so obviously loved taking it to the chest the first time.

Snickering at the thought of that night I take another sip, my coffee already half gone and the coffee mare with the work uniform was coming around asking the few patrons that are here if they want another cup as for me, I might need another cup because I see four stallions and a mare coming right at me.

"So little one, did you really beat Nightmare Moon that night when Princess Celestia went missing?" the head stallion said, he was just a standard earth pony with a dark brown coat and beige mane and tail, his cutie mark was of a sailboat on the ocean with a net thrown over the side, a sea fishermen...fisherpony.

Putting down my cup of coffee I reached down to the side of my cushion and grabbed my Stardust Rod before resting it on my lap, hinting of what I might do to them if they dare laugh at me.

"Yes, I did, and before you laugh or even question me on how someone so small can beat somepony that is a great deal larger then myself. So choose wisely, fire, ice, water,or lightning if you are going to insult me." I said calmly, my left hand tapping lightly on the hard metal rod that was handle of the staff, the one eye that the ponies could see calmly staring back at them.

The stallion and his friends shuffled a bit on their hooves, looking uneasy at each other until the head stallion finally spoke up.

"Not saying I don't believe you and all..." he started out, his voice wavering a bit before he swallowed the lump in his throat and pressed on, "but there is no way a little guy like you could have beaten that alicorn all by yourself."

Staring at the head stallion I pulled out a single gil and placed it on the table, waiting for him to choose which element he wants to get hit with for insinuating that I am wrong in defeating Nightmare Moon a week ago.

"Oh...uhh....water?" he finally said and as soon he started to give the nervous laugh I got up from my cushion, finished the rest of my coffee, held my staff up and gave it a single twirl before the soft hum of magic surrounded me.

"Hey! No casting magic in this establishment!"

"Sorry about that sir." I said and with a tip of my hat I walked outside before talking back to the stallion, "You, follow me, time for me to prove you wrong." and with that statement he trotted out, his body shaking in terror, seeing how he was victim number fifteen to my proving ponies wrong tally.

Twirling my staff again and as soon as they heard the gentle hum of mana in the air and thrusting my right hand forward, the stallion only saw two small spheres of water opposite of each other spinning at the same speed and height downward until it hit the ground by his hooves, the last thing he heard clearly was the sound of water exploding beneath him and completely soaking him to the skin in freezing cold water.

"And that was the only non-harmful combat magic that I know of, besides using healing magic on the undead voidsent." shrugging at the sight of the only mare in the stallion's group of friends, she just gave me a confused stare, not knowing that there is such thing as the 'undead'. They are real, they are annoying, they never need to eat or sleep, never complain and that they are always easy to kill.

Once my demonstration is finished I let out a shrill whistle, everypony that was around me that heard that whistle lowered their ears down from the loudness of it but what then drew everyponies attention was the loud chirping noise that followed the whistle.

Coming down the street, still wearing the saddle, stirrup and Ul'Dahn flag was my faithful chocobo, Dizzy, still active and spry as the day I hatched him. At a young age Dizzy was very active and was always climbing, jumping and running all over the place in my parent's home, he always got into everything he could stick his beak in. As he grew up we started to bond, we went everywhere Horizon together, from the bottom of the partial mine shaft and up to the top of the ramp of the town and sometimes to the neighboring town that was past the small ponds and land fishes. When Dizzy finally reached full maturity I had a saddle and stirrup made just for him, and by the time I had reached my eighteenth birthday I left home to be an adventurer the two of us were inseparable and once we had our name out there we eventually joined the Immortal Flames and well, that's how he earned the flag attachment. That and he also earned himself a few pats and pets from a few Hyur's, Miqo'te's, and Elezen's.

As Dizzy came running down the street I saw that Rainbow Dash was flying beside him, easily keeping up and every few seconds ducking and diving around his head. The two of them became the best of friends ever since we showed up here, apparently Rainbow Dash has a need for speed and Dizzy, well he just like something that is able to keep up with him when he does his daily running, and sleeping. Watching the two race each other is sometimes funny to watch cause they always try to outdo the other, Dizzy would try to nip her tail and pull her back and for Dash, she would just confuse him and almost trip him up, the two can be amusing at times except for when they are asleep, then they are just boring.

When the two finally showed up, Dizzy being the loser and plopping down beside me, and Rainbow Dash being the winner and  landing on top of Dizzy's saddle before snoring almost instantaneously. One moment she was up and about, flapping her wings like a champ and the next, fast asleep and snoring like a Roegadyn logger after a hard days work, how one can fall asleep that fast without the help of a sleeping spell is beyond me.

Sighing in defeat that my chocobo was asleep, my plans to go to the Apple Family today had to be altered a bit, and since I was supposed to help Applebloom with her cutie mark hunting I had to be prepared for the unexpected, and that I needed to ask her if she needed any assistance with her math homework. Walking to the farm was nice and quiet, a few ponies waving at me and cooing at my adorableness and after a while I finally reached the field of apple trees, all of them perfectly aligned and not one apple was out of place.

"Horseapples!" a familiar southern accent shouted, the voice clearly female and that was coming to the west of me, somewhere deep within the orchard was my target, Miss Applejack. Every time I want to spend time with Applebloom to help her with her homework and to help her get her cutie mark I would have to check in with the nefarious apple farmer, of course when I first met Applebloom I was taken aback a bit because she reminded me of my younger sister, who at the time was training to be a weaver. Not sure why little Damimi Yayalito would want to be a weaver but her aspirations to become the very best weaver in the world proved itself when she passed the test on her first try, it took me five attempts before I finally got it right.

Walking toward the sounds of hooves stomping on dirt I bobbed and weaved through the rows of trees, my eye looking around for the orange farmpony and to no avail did I see but I kept hearing her voice, her shouts of pony profanity was my only indicator that I was getting closer.

I eventually found Applejack, she was busy kicking an apple tree, or well from where I am standing, she is missing the tree, her hooves keep hitting nothing but open and each miss made her spout some sort of profanity or an actual word taht is profanity, something I would never suspect the honest mare to be doing.

"Miss Applejack, are you alright?" I said while approaching the slightly tired mare from the left, and when I barely put down my hand on her back she reacted rather, violently.

"Ah buck!" Applejack shouted and before I knew what happened she turned her back to me and in a second I saw my life flash before my eyes, from my humble beginning as a tiny tot of cuteness, to a child waving a stick around trying to cast magic like the heroes of light, to me taking my first steps in the Quicksand Inn to become an adventurer, my first day as a thaumaturgist, taking my oath as a black mage, fighting in the Bowl of Embers against the Primal Ifirit, and before I could remember anything else I felt and saw both her rear hooves fly past my head, both of them coming into contact with my hat, the pointy cone of my hat bending backwards from the impact and in that scant second of her hooves over my head I saw something I rather not see causing both of my eyes but mainly the one that everyone sees to clamp shut, my body stiffen up then falling slowly backwards like a tree being brought down by a logger.

'Nald'Thal, please scrub what I had just seen from my eyes for I cannot do it alone.'

As I laid on the nice soft dirt floor, my eye staring up at the sky watching clouds move overhead and the trees swaying in the breeze, and as soon as I let myself recede to the fate of the startled farm mare, said fate deciding mare never said anything until after Twilight Sparkle came over to talk to her friend.

"Hey Applejack, are you alright you seem to be...what happened here?!"

Still laying on the ground and staring at the sky I just let out a small guttural groan of discomfort before waving my hand around over my head to show to the purple unicorn that I am still alive and in one piece.

"Tatalito, are you okay?"

"Yes Twilight Sparkle, I am...I am alright, just having my life flash before my eye after nearly having my head kicked off by a startled farm pony who is obviously sleep deprived. And I can't move out of fear of getting nearly kicked again." I said, not moving an inch as the farm pony somewhat stood over me and from here I can see that she is swaying back and forth a bit and that she was on the verge of falling asleep where she stood.

As Twilight started talking to Applejack I slowly shuffled my legs back and forth, inching my way out from underneath the sleep exhausted pony I dragged myself out and away from the line of fire.

"Good luck with your friend Twilight Sparkle, you will need it since she nearly kicked my hat all the way to that dark forest." and with that I got up, dusted myself off the best I could and jogged over to the tree house that Applebloom loves to hang out in.

The jog took a few minutes out of my day but I can bare with it knowing that my teaching skills will not go to waste in this land of talking mythical beings and foolish winged unicorn tyrants.

Arriving to the filly's clubhouse I went up to the finely made wooden door, straightened out my pointy hat and made sure that the eye-patch was tightly secured to my head and with that I knocked on the door three times, waiting for my friend to open the door. Only having to wait for a few seconds I heard the sounds of small hooves scrabbling on the wooden planks and the door was opened to reveal the little yellow ball of energy and excitement, Applebloom, and boy was she excited for no reason that I can guess besides she acquired her cutie mark but a quick look at her flank showed nothing but fur and more fur.

"Lito! Yer finally 'ere!" The little filly shouted as she grabbed me by the hand with her hooves and started to drag me in. I know that sometimes small things can contain hidden power but this filly, I bet she can buck one of these tree's in half if she gave it all she got.

Sitting down on the wooden floorboards I took off my hat and reached inside of it, pulling out a small roll of scrolls, the homework assignments that I have created off the top of my head that the little filly can easily finish on her own. Taking out a spare ink well and quill from my pocket I motioned for the farm filly to sit beside me, her practice work is ready for her and that by doing this simple multiplication and division homework Applebloom would be able to pass her math test that is coming up at the end of the week this month.

"So Applebloom, are you ready to begin today's assignment or do you still need some time to get your things together?" I asked the yellow filly with the authoritative tone of a teacher and yet I kept it down to the point where I came across as a father figure helping his daughter with her schoolwork.

"Ah'm ready Mr. Yayalito." her words muffled from the pencil in her mouth as she began to put her mind to the paper, slowly solving and handling the problems set before her.

Watching the little filly work on her practice work I pulled out my own parchment and quill, my thoughts leading to Ul'Dah and how it is faring, I know that I have only been gone from it for eight days but even I know that eight days is enough time for an attack to take place from either the beast tribes or from the empire. Shuttering at the thought of the empire making the first strike against Ul'Dah and her allies while we are still licking our wounds and reforging our tools of war for another skirmish against the imperialism that is the Garleans.

Pulling myself from my thoughts I went back to the parchment in front of me, dipping the tip of the quill into the ink I started to scribble down a short list of things I must do be it mainly owning my own home, modifying it to where it will have a large garden for my plants, an underground section for my forge and anvil, and lastly a master bedroom for myself, afterall I do love sleeping in giant beds since it makes me feel like I am living in the life of luxury.

Staring down at the scroll on the floor I rolled it up before putting it back inside my hat, my eyes moving over to Applebloom as I watched her write down a simple algebraic problem, a cute little concentration face was being worn and just seeing her actually put her heart into this was heartwarming to me seeing that my teaching skills won't be wasted and that I have a student actually apply themselves to do their practice work and their homework.

After an hour has passed along with five pages worth of practice assignments completed I told the young mare to pass me the scrolls to see how she well she did with something that should be a little more advanced with what she usually does at the school she goes to.

"Alright Ms. Applebloom, that is all for today, remember to always pay attention to what symbol is on the paper and to follow the rules that are for it. And also please tell your sister to go get some sleep, she is sleep bucking and nearly took my head off when I told her to go rest." and with that I tipped my hat to the little mare, bid her a fond farewell and left her clubhouse to go straight to Sugarcube Corner for my mid-afternoon snack of two chocolate muffins and a small shake, how Eorzea doesn't even know on how to produce such a simple and yet tasty delicacy is beyond me.

As I was walking down the dirt road that led back to Ponyville I saw a cyan blur shoot across the sky, my ears slightly catching the sounds of her voice screaming loudly in the air. I merely shrugged it off as Rainbow Dash being crazy with her tricks, and speaking of tricks I do believe my eyes are having illusions placed upon them or I am actually seeing Applejack trying to corral a bunch of woodland critters by force instead of being gentle with them.

Slowly shaking myself from what I had just seen I push myself to keep going to snack central for Ponyville, the grumbling emptiness that is my stomach demanding for the pastry confectionaries of the pink party pony is too damn high and my gil needs to be offloaded somewhere reliable, that and I think Bon-Bon doesn't like me for constantly distracting her sister cause I have 'hands'. Now that I think about it, seeing Miss Lyra together with Miss Bon-Bon practically all the time is making me think that they are not sisters but the best of friends, or significant others, or do I dare even say it out loud but due to me loving the fact that I want to live so I will just say it in my head, 'fuck buddies?'.

Somewhere out in Ponyville, a cream colored mare sitting on the bench beside a lime green unicorn sitting upright and sipping on a slushie shivered involuntary as somepony was talking about herself and Lyra being together in an intimate fashion.

Walking down the streets of Ponyville I came to realize that I had no general idea of where Sugarcube Corner is located, at the time I just followed Twilight and Barb to it since they lived here and that I didn't really need to know where everything is located but as of now, I am standing in front of a spa and the nice mares inside told me that the establishment I am looking for is across town. They didn't exactly paint me a picture of where it is but just a general direction so that is a start but when I get back to my place of residence I am going to have to look for a map and study it, memorize it, and lastly remember where my chocobo is currently resting at since Fluttershy didn't exactly tell me where she is staying.

Thinking about what my precious big yellow bird is up to the tall tell sign of somepony shouting at the top of their lungs and it was getting louder as the source of the disturbance got closer. It wasn't before long that the source of the yelling landed in front of me, the dust cloud it made upon impact, waving my hands in front of me I pushed away the cloud of debris until I came face to muzzle with a disorientated and very dazed Rainbow Dash.

'Damn, this girl got some distance from that launch...I wonder if I can get my chocobo to get on that and see how far we can fly.'

Helping the dazed pegasus up I inquired as to what happened to her and her response was fairly humorous from my perspective.

"Applejack was half asleep and leapt off the platform without telling me and launched me practically above Cloudsdale!" her nasally voice somewhat irritating but her tale of being launched almost into the dark void of the sky was something of an achievement.

Looking at where she came from I saw a thin cloud trail of where she sailed through, bits of clouds moving downward told me that she went through one before crash landing before me.

"Well Dashie, I went over to help Applebloom with her math homework and when I tried talking to her I nearly got my head bucked off and saw something that can't be unseen. At least I helped Applebloom overcome her fear of geometry." helping her brush the dust and dirt out of her mane and wings I saw that each time I brushed against one of the feathered appendages that they would twitch and flutter almost erratically to the point of it being funny.

"Quit it!" she nearly shouted, pulling her wings away from me while trying what seems to be her best at keeping them under her control and back by her sides instead of being fully exposed in a threatening manner.

Raising both my hands in a defensive manner, stepping back a few feet away from the obviously fuming mare, not wanting to get my head bitten off since she is acting like any other female I have met here or back home that when they get irritated that they will lash out at the cause of annoyance, mainly me since I can be fairly blunt when it comes to certain matters.

After waiting a minute or two for the cyan mare to cool down I came back to her to ask what she was hoping to accomplish by getting launched into the atmosphere by a catapult, her answer was to do a really cool trick with the extra speed that the catapult would have provided for her. The extra thrust she said, would have allowed her to do tricks easier since she didn't have to build much speed to do them, sort of amazing that she thought of that but what she didn't think of was what could of happened if she was wrong about having a pony toss themselves over the side to fall onto a piece of wood with a target on it and that if she went past her target speed and injured or worse, killed herself.

"Rainbow Dash, I would say that what you were planning wasn't the most brilliant of things you could have done..." I said as Rainbow Dash got up close to my face to the point where her forehead was pressing against mine but I continued on knowing that it might result in getting my butt kicked, "but at least you managed to reach the proper speed you were striving to achieve, good for you. Now all you really need is someone reliable enough to launch you when you are ready."

As soon as the conversation was over I stepped back, turned on my heel, and wandered off long enough to turn the corner before quickly running as fast my stubby little legs could take me, turning another corner before slowing down to catch my breath, running really isn't my forte.

Turning my head back and seeing that the cyan pegasus wasn't following me at the moment I let out a short sigh of relief before bumping into Twilight, apparently she heard the sound of her friend falling from the sky before plowing into the ground in a spectacular fashion and was on her way to see if she is alright and when she inquired me on what I was doing I told her that I was on my way to Sugarcube corner for my mid-afternoon snack.

With a wave of goodbye from the both of us we went our separate ways, my destination somewhere in this area and that was when it hit me, I should have asked Twilight for directions since she is bound to know every single route throughout this village like the back of her hand--er--hoof. Looking back to see if she was still within earshot but sadly she was already gone around the corner and that my endeavor to find the bakery within time for me to get my discount for happy hour, but from the look of things I wasn't going to make it in time.

Jogging around the next bend, my mind and stomach hoping that I can still make it in time before happy hour is over but seeing how the sun is already past midday and that I just saw Applejack gallop on by and when I saw where she was going I was finally happy to see that it was into Sugarcube Corner, my salvation close at hand.

Walking into the confectionery producing establishment I took in a deep sniff, smelling the overwhelmingly sweet aroma of baked goods, cakes and most importantly, cookies, sweet delicious cookies.

And from what I can hear in the background of clattering pots and pans, something is going on back there but my suspicions that they were being robbed was put to rest when a happy looking Pinkie Pie skipped into view, holding a tray of cupcakes on her back before placing them on the counter, apparently those are the free ones. Upon them being placed down the tray was immediately assaulted by a mob of hungry ponies, the cupcakes didn't last long and I could feel a single sad tear slide down the inside of my eye-patch before it sizzled into purple smoke and dispersed into the air.

Staring at the empty tray covered in crumbs and saliva, the blown out tray was slightly rattling in place before it stopped moving, my eye glued to the tray as I moved over to it, my hands reaching for it and once I lifted it up I found nothing but bits and drool.

"I am never going to get the good stuff..." I muttered, dropping the tray on the floor before slowly dragging my feet out of the building but I was stopped when I heard someone shout within the kitchens.

Turning around I saw Pinkie Pie hopping over to me, and between her teeth was a brown paper bag.

As she stopped in front of me I looked at her then she looked at me then I looked back at her before her eyes went from me to the bag and I took the hint. Reaching out slowly I found my hands grabbing the paper bag and looked at Pinkie, the bubbly pink mare was smiling widely at me before she motioned for me to open the brown sack up, and with a loud swallow of spittle I bent my head downward, slowly pulled the bag open, then with a holy glow, saw three delicious looking cupcakes.

"P...Pinkie....this...thank you." I said while holding open my cupcake bag, tears of happiness threatening to slip out but with my strong mental will and that I do not want to waste tears of cupcakes that will keep me going till dinner time.

"Don't thank me, I just don't want to see you all mopey and sad cause you couldn't get a cupcake from the happy hour special!"

With a warm smile, something I hardly ever do unless it is earned or warranted but this girl always seems to find a way to worm one out of me.

Thinking about pulling one out and eating one here I shook that thought off and decided to eat them at home, maybe even show it off to Twilight and Barb before eating it in front of their faces, maybe that will get Barb to at least stop pestering me. With a short hop, skip and a near trip-to-faceplant I made my way back home, the sounds of ponies soon reached my ear as they all slowly made their way away from me, they all looked like they came down with some sort of sickness.

Straying from my path back to the tree library I continue to see more and more ponies looking slightly green, acting woozy and looking like they just ate the worst food imaginable and their stomachs are trying to pump themselves free of the vile contents...that or some pony managed to organize all of them to behave like this around me so I would be worried that a disease is running rampant through the village. Either way I am not giving up these cupcakes, they belong to me and I will freeze any of these ponies solid if they try to remove my cupcakes from my plump little hands.

The light sounds of pitter-patter coming from each step I take can be easily heard in the streets as they have been hastily emptied, why they were empty I do not know but what I do know is this, it makes me feel smaller then normal when there is no one around to help compare sizes with. That and if there was ponies out here then I could easily be lost amongst them since the only way to find me is by looking for a tall purple pointy hat in a crowd of pastel colors that are always moving.

Good luck with that one endeavor.

Smiling to myself I waddled on back home, my eyes on the paper bag in my hands, my thoughts filled with a jaunty tune I once heard in the Quicksand Inn and the small clicking of nails on stone told me that my favorite little ball of yellow feathers was right behind me, following me closely as I saw my bundle of joy eyeing my cupcakes like he was going to get one.

"No Dizzy, my cupcakes." I said as he slowly moved his beak close to my paper bag, slightly nipping at it, trying to rip it open so one of the tasty delicacies would fall on the ground but I easily moved the bag away from his inquisitive beak. Huffing in slight annoyance Dizzy tried again but this time brought his head lower so he can try to rub his neck against me which would hopefully distract me long enough so he can nip the bag open to get at my cupcakes, it earned a swat to the beak with two fingers and a stern "No.".

I think he got the message this time cause he stopped trying to bite my bag but as soon as we made it to the tree library my Lalafell senses were tingling, my senses telling me that behind door number one was six ponies and a little hatchling were waiting just for me. Slowly placing my left hand on the doorknob I gently twisted it to the left, pushed the wooden door forward and to my 'surprise' there was no ponies there waiting for me.

"Huh....I wonder where those mares went...usually they would be waiting right here for me to talk about friendship or some sort of lesson or even if I found someone to take to the 'Gala', as if I would take anyone to a snob party." talking to myself in an empty library is a common thing for me, why is it common is simple. No one can bother me when I am face deep in a book that has earned my undivided attention.

Sneaking into the kitchen I placed my paper bag on the table and to be sure that no one finds the cupcakes I unbuttoned my hat from my eye-patch and collar, re-buttoned the eye-patch to my collar then lastly placed my hat over the bag to conceal the sugary treats beneath it.

Hearing the sounds of hooves tapping against the carpeted floor I turned around to see that Twilight was carrying Barb on her back, Applejack looks like she has some sleep, Pinkie Pie is slightly green, Rarity and Fluttershy talking softly to their sick friend and Rainbow Dash was flying by her side, my guess discussing on who could have pranked her like that.

"Oh, Tatalito, glad that we have found you." Twilight said as they made their way into the kitchen, Barb climbed off Twilight's back and lifted herself up onto the table and looked at my hat.

"And what is the reason as to why you were searching for me Miss Sparkle?" I muttered loud enough for them to hear as I placed my staff on the table pointed at Barb, a silent warning to stay away from the hat of power.

"Well...we were wondering if you know of any cures for food poisoning." Twilight spoke again but this time it caught me somewhat by surprise, my hand stopping itself from lifting up my hat to go for the bag.

"Food poisoning?" I said in mock surprise, knowing that these mares are probably gonna ask me something more secretive about me or ask if they can have a piece or one of my spare cupcakes when my guard is down.

Lifting up my hat I revealed to them the brown paper bag and in that instant they all looked at me as if I was holding a powder keg with a lit torch hovering above it. Plunging my right hand into the bag I pulled out one of the cupcakes, my eye looking at the tasty looking confectionary snack with a gluttonous glazed stare and before they could speak up I bit down on the cupcake, humming in approval of its exquisite taste before taking another bite, then another, and another, and before long I ate the whole thing, and to show that it was gone I let out a loud, but rather short belch of approval.

"Yes, apparently a sleep deprived Applejack was helping-" as Twilight was talking I pulled out the second cupcake and took a large bite out of it. At this point all seven of them were just staring at me in shock and slightly in disgust but when I was finishing off the second cupcake Twilight decided to drop a major schism on my head, "and maybe Applejack made a large mistake and put in things that shouldn't be mixed into the cupcake mixture and has practically poisoned half of Ponyville."

I stopped in mid-bite and stared at the cupcake in my hand then to Applejack who was looking mighty sheepish as my eye looked back at the cupcake before I shrugged and finished it off.

"It doesn't taste that bad Twilight. Sure it has a grainy texture to it and that its a lot squishier then normal but it still has that great taste." I said as I began to eat the third one but it was when I began to eat it did my stomach let out a loud grumble.

"Woah, that cupcake has one hell of a kick." I said as I took another bite, finishing the last one off as my stomach grumbled again but this time it was louder then the last one.

"Oh...I think there is something wrong with that last cupcake..." my vision started to get a bit woozy as I felt green in the gills and my guts was rumbling rather badly.

"Ohhhhh.......ohh gods....my tummy doesn't feel so good." I felt my stomach do a complete flip on itself, the contents of my gut was now on the march but in the wrong direction.

"I...I think I am going to...to....urp." I muttered the last part before I covered my mouth and ran up the stairs with all possible haste to the bathroom.

As soon as I arrived to the bathroom I slammed the door shut, not locking it, and as soon as I unbuttoned the upper part of my coat I shoved my head over the toilet and let loose my guts upon the porcelain throne.

"HURK!" was the only sound I could make that the ponies and dragoness could hear outside the door besides the sounds of partial solids and liquids hitting the toilet water and bowel.

"Umm....ma' bad gals."
> Griffon Mire
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

	"I think I am good now....no wait...here it come again....HORK!" I threw up one last time, my stomach now using its new found knowledge of repelling the accursed 'Baked Bads' and by repelling I mean puking my guts out into a toilet with full force and full brutality.

Once the last of my stomach contents have been removed I promptly brushed my teeth, used the extra-strength mouth wash, brushed my teeth again with a thoroughly cleaned toothbrush then took a hot shower and once all that was done I went straight to bed. As soon as my back hit the softness that was once the guest bed I let out a long-winded sigh of relief, my body aching and tired and is in dire need of sleep, and this soft, plush bed is going to give it to me, even if there is a Barb staring at me with little hearts in her eyes looking at me with a cute warming smile on her fa-....

"Barb....what are you doing in my room?" my voice is hoarse from all the discharging I had done earlier but I was in no condition to deal with Barb at this point in time.

"I was told to help you if you ever needed my assistance in reaching the bathroom." Barb's voice sounded honest and truthful, but the way she was looking at me told me a different story but as I had mentioned earlier, I was in no condition to fight this lovey dovey dragoness off.

"Fine, fine Barb, you win this time. And I am guessing you want to sleep under the blankets with me to make sure that I am getting better huh?" I asked, raising an eyebrow as I laid on my bed without my coat, the black materia-laced garb was being washed very thoroughly by Rarity even though she was grumbling about it still being hideous to look at and was an affront to fashion everywhere.

I didn't care if it was ugly or unsightly, as long as it keeps all my blood inside my body and my limbs attached to me it can be ugly and rainbow colored for all I care.

What I failed to realize at the time was that I had allowed Barb to sleep next to me in bed, not just allowed to sleep in the same room as me, not even just allowed to sleep on my bed, but to sleep in my room, on my bed, and under the covers. I know what it is like to feel scales coming into contact with my skin but this might actually be the first time that I will feel warm, living scales coming into contact with my body. This thought is both thrilling and scary at the same time for a couple of reasons, first off that Barb is still trying to get me to love her even though she is still too young for that kind of thing to happen, second thing is that she hasn't even tried to ask me out on a date, something that I might accept if she asked and was close to my age or was even part of the legal system. Lastly, she didn't even try to cook me anything cause probably the fastest way to my heart is my stomach.

"If you do anything to me in my sleep you will regret it...just get your scaly butt in here already." I said as I crawled under the sheets, my body wailing at me to not move.

With a happy squeal from Barb she crawled under the sheets, snuggled up to me and wrapped her arms around my chubby body into a hug.

'Woah...she really is warm...maybe a little too warm.'

Next Day

"Mmmmm, that feels nice Momodi...I never knew your tongue was that rough...feels like sanding paper...hehe...stop it Momo I'm ticklish." I muttered in my sleep, I was holding onto something warm and it was resting on top of me, whatever it is it surely likes to lick my neck. Whatever or whoever is on top of me sure does feel nice and warm, hell its nice and its licking me, weighs almost the same as Momodi except it feels like scales instead of that soft silky smooth creamy skin.

Wait what? Scales? What?

My one good eye snapped open as I looked down to see Barb licking my neck, she was holding me tightly as I saw small beads of sweat covered me from head to toe and that she was licking those beads off with her long freaky tongue. In my defense my response from being licked like that was perfectly reasonable.

"What the actual fuck Barb! What the fuck did I tell you before you got in my bed!" I shouted before kicking Barb and somehow myself out of the bed, the large quilted blanket staying in place as the two of us fall out the sides and onto our heads with a echoing clunk sound.

Picking myself off the ground I started to rub the spot of my head that I fell on, the pain was lingering and it was a dozy, my vision was swimming from the disorientation of having ones head collide with solid carpet and wood. Shaking my head a few times I felt my brain rattle around inside my cranium for a second before it resumed its place, my eyes now glued to the source of my ire and dismay, Barbara the Dragoness of House Sparkle, and she was busy on the floor holding her head while whimpering slightly.

"Barb, I specifically told you to do nothing to me while I was asleep and what do I wake up to? You, licking my neck as if it was a lollipop! Not only did do exactly what I told you to not do but it also felt really weird." I said the last word with a shudder, I know I have been licked before by well....a few past friends and girlfriends but this really went over the top.

Sighing to myself I walked around the bed and up to Barb who was sniffling a bit, her clawed hands still holding her head as she rocked back and forth and with a roll of the eye I sat down beside the crying hatchling and gave her a hug, silently muttering that if Barb doesn't quiet down then Twilight will burst into my room and demand to know why her younger sister is on the floor crying.

"Its alright Barb, I didn't mean to snap at you or push you off the bed, it is just that I have a lot of things currently going on in my head right now and everything is just putting too much pressure on me. Can you forgive me?" I said with a half-heart felt apology, I was somewhat telling the truth afterall about things going on inside my head at the moment.

"Really?" Barb said with a quiet sniffle, her eyes partially red as a few tears stream ran down her face.

"Yes, really. But I do want to know why you were licking my neck earlier." a stern tone in my voice as I asked the now slightly blushing dragoness the question as to why I felt her tongue slivering all over my neck earlier this morning.

Blushing while I was hugging her I felt her tail slowly wrap itself around my right leg, the warmth emanating from it wasn't uncomfortable as it was soothing but it made me slightly worried that she would try something on me while my guard was down. When she finally worked up the courage to speak I swear to the gods that her cheeks were smoldering and that she was stuttering her words before she finally got the guts to speak clearly.

"I was licking you because you smelled nice and you tasted good!" and when she shouted that I had to clamp her mouth shut with both of my hands and my face was now just as red as hers and that I thought I heard the sound of hooves coming from outside the room. Her tail had tightened up around my leg when she shouted out, it felt constricting and at the same time very hot and also I thought my pants was going to catch fire from the heat alone.

As the sound of hooves clip-clopped over to the door we both panicked, mainly me because I was already old enough to do the deed but I think the same can not be said for Barb, and when the sound of the doorknob being twisted with an ominous purple glow she reacted by hugging my harder forcing me to straighten up in surprise and because the weight balance was off we fell backwards with Barb being on top of me and our arms being wrapped around each other as if we were embracing one another.

Once the door was opened it revealed at first a concerned Twilight Sparkle but as she saw the two of us, mainly me being below Barb with a serious case of blushing syndrome along with Barb who was sporting the very same case of blush. That concerned look on her face rapidly turned into a smirk with a hint of flustered red as she tried to hold it together.

"This isn't what it looks like Twilight!" both me and Barb shouted at the exact same time as I tried to force Barb off of me but sadly my body is still reeling from my vomit marathon yesterday and was still not in the mood for heavy lifting.

Giggling to herself Twilight said a few choice words that only made the situation appear much more worse then it really is but what she said was enough to make me just give up and lie there on the ground and just accept the hug.

"If you two are going to be doing such activities at least warn me a day in advance." the purple unicorn started to chuckle as she started to close the door on our 'activities'.

My response was to throw one of my boots at her head, the thick-soled projectile missing her head completely but it told her otherwise to go away.

Looking up at Barb I signaled her with my one good eye and that piercing stare that I gave her was her one chance to get off of me before things got ugly real fast for her. I do not know what dragons tastes like but if she kept this up then she would know first hand what it feels like to be scaled, skinned, flayed and cooked all in the same day.

"Barb....we will never speak of this ever again." I said as the blush was still remaining on my face, my heart rate starting to lower itself down back to normal standards.

"But Tatalito-" Barb started to speak but I covered her mouth gently with a hand.

"Never speak of this again." calmly speaking I told her to never mention this morning's events to any pony as long as we lived.

"Bu-" I clamped her mouth shut with both hands as I brought my face close to hers enough to almost make it look like we were kissing. Something I would never do to a minor....if she could be declared one since she is somewhat the same age as Twilight.

"NEVER!!!" our faces were pretty much making contact with the others, my good eye staring into hers as she was looking into mine, and just when I think it was over I see Barb give me a devious smirk before her tongue slowly slivered out of her mouth and licked my neck one last time before I had enough strength to launch her off of me and onto the bed.

That morning all of Ponyville heard the sound a young dragoness screaming out in terror followed by several loud explosions and for those that are already outside of their homes, a smoke trail leading from the library going into the sky and ending in the fountain/statue of Princess Celestia standing on her rear hooves.

Sugarcube Corner, 9:30am

"Pinkie Pie, your cup cakes yesterday may have given me a bad case of stomach flu but I already got over it, so how much would it be for a milkshake?" I asked the pink mare as she bounced from place to place, Mr. and Mrs. Cake were too busy with the other customers or working in the kitchens do deal with me at the moment so that left me at the mercy of the chronic talker.

"Erm....I think the milkshakes are eight bits hold on." she said and after a second she came back with my order, a vanilla milkshake and it looked soooooooooo good.

Passing her eight gil I took the milkshake from her back and started to take small sips from it, savoring its rich vanilla taste but there was something off about it, it had a more....I don't know what it is but it tastes so familiar.

"Pinkie, can you run down to the market and buy some more milk, we ran out." Mrs. Cake said from the kitchen, her tone seemed a bit off, as if something was amiss and she couldn't quite put her hoof on what it could be.

"Okie dokie lokie!" and with that Pinkie was gone, leaving behind an after-image of her along with an outline before that too left after the bubbly bouncy mare.

Taking another sip from the milkshake I found that it tasted sweeter then normal, the other two times it was pretty awesome but today it was sweeter and it had more of a smoother texture to it. Staring at my milkshake I swiveled the straw around a bit, mixing it up to see if it is just the mixture used in its creation but I found nothing but sweet vanilla goodness.

"Mr. Yayalito, did Pinkie tell you where she got the milk for that shake?" Mrs. Cake asked me as I took another sip, the sweet tasty goodness was half way gone when she asked me that, my eyebrow going up in stark confusion.

"No, she did not Mrs. Cake, why, was this the last of the milk you had for the day or something?"

"No no, sweetie, we ran out before you got here but it makes me wonder how exactly did she make that without any milk."

"Maybe she found enough in the jug to use for me I don't know but this tastes sweeter then it normally does."

"Uh....could I have a taste, I think I might know where it came from." the bubblegum blue earth mare asked me, her cheeks look a bit flustered for some reason as she trotted over to me, her question for a sip almost went over my head but I caught it in time to comprehend those words.

Turning the straw around so it was pointing at her I gently pushed the glass to the female proprietor who thanked me quietly as she took a small sip and at first her face showed no change or signs of disgust with the milk that was used for my milkshake, but when she took a second but slightly longer sip her face changed to one of at first confusion then horror.

"Mr. Yayalito, that isn't milk in that milkshake!"

"What do you mean? What else could it be, powdered milk?"

"No its....its....please don't be mad at Pinkie for accidentally mixing it up in your drink."

"Mrs. Cake, whatever it is that Pinkamena Diane Pie has done to my drink I am sure it can be easily solved with medical magic. Now please, tell me what she put into my milkshake."

"Okay....she put....she put my..."

"Go on, she put your...what, your secret flour mix in my milkshake?"

"No, its...please don't be mad when I say this but...she used my b-breast milk for your milkshake...."

At first I thought she was just joking but when I saw the faint evidence of blush now forming on her cheeks and that she is fidgeting in place as if she broke someones window with a ball, that was when I knew that she was speaking the truth.

First I looked at my milkshake now back in my hands, looked at the somewhat chubby pastel blue motherly mare, then to her breasts that I could barely see from where I am seeing and what I saw only made Mrs. Cake's words more true, I saw right at the tip of said teat a single drop of alabaster cream before it fell from its home and splattered onto the tile in a tiny splash. Looking back to my drink I thought for a long time on how I should proceed with this situation, I could stop drinking this milkshake immediately but I would lose my tasty drink and probably offend Mrs. Cake in some fashion or I could just suck it up and keep drinking as if nothing happened.

Staring at Mrs. Cake I grabbed my drink and this time I started to take a long and slow sips and not once letting my eyes off of the now furiously blushing mare was shuffling from hoof to hoof while not trying to look at me as I finished the apparently breast milkshake that tasted way better then a normal one...and now I am not sure if I want a normal one ever again because of this mix-up.

Once the deed was done we stared at each other, well I did most of the staring since I have a high tolerance of embarrassment and that I couldn't be mad at a mare that didn't know what was wrong.

"Mrs. Cake, we will never speak of this to anyone." I said and as expected Mrs. Cake nodded at me before quickly retreating into the kitchens in time for Pinkie Pie to trot through the front doors of the Sugarcube Corner with four jugs of milk on her back in a metal basket with a rolled up newspaper in her mouth, humming a cheery tune and just in time to because I was just about to leave.

Nodding a bit at Pinkie I waddled my way out the store just in time to avoid hearing Pinkie let out an over-exaggerated gasp and was able to avoid the wild mare and from her motormouth.

Waddling in the streets of Ponyville I was feeling good and with a deep breath of fresh morning air I can feel that today was going to be a good day. The sun was bright, the birds was chirping happily and even the little fillies and colts are playing in the park nearby with their little games. It was during my waddling in the streets did something out of the ordinary nine days I have been here that something new has been thrown into the mix of routine motions.

"Watch where your going dweeb." a fairly female, if not slightly masculine voice said as I was bumped away from a large figure with brown fur. Turning to look at which pony I bumped into that would dare call me a 'dweeb' and just walk away without facing a waterga to the face for being rude to me.

I had expected to see a large pony walking away from me without a care in the world for their own safety and health but what I saw was clearly not a pony, hell it doesn't even look like a pony in the first place. Staring at the imposing figure of the stranger I saw that instead of a pony body it was a fairly large lion central frame with the except of a pair of large wings on it/her/his back, the front paws have been replaced with a pair of claws, and instead of a lion head it was an eagle's and it had light purple eye shadow, amber eyes and has light purple feathers in her plumage on her chest and head.

Not sure what exactly I was looking at but what I am sure is that this...female has just called me a 'dweeb' and I am clearly not one. What is this girl in, elementary school.

"No, you should watch where your going featherball." I said with a hint of malice in my voice, I do not know whoever, or whatever this girl is but you do not show disrespect to a Master Thaumaturgist and expect to walk away not covered in burns, frozen flesh or electrical injures or for that matter in one piece.

As soon as I said that insult to the bird lion creature thing, she immediately stopped in her tracks, snapped her head back to partially face me, her left eye shrinking a bit as she looks at me, and before I could blink she was upon me and was staring down at me as if I was an inconsiderate little worm. And on an unrelated note, the term 'Featherball' is considered one of many insults to pegasi everywhere, another insult would be featherbrain, walking feather duster, or if your a carnivore, dinner, mainly cause of the wings might be like chicken wings.

"What did you just call me chump?" the eagle lion shouted at me point blank in the face as her wings has spread out in a threatening manner, and normally I would be scared of such a display if I hadn't already been accustomed to feathery fiends in my time spent in Eorzea, after all Garuda was a bitch to deal with since the Ixals were constantly interfering with us trying to seal her away back to wherever it is in the void that she belongs to.

Clearing my throat and standing ramrod straight I looked into her eyes and said again, "Featherball. You need to learn to watch where you are going unless you want to get your ass handed to you on a silver platter by something half your size and weight." my voice still carrying the hint of malice in it but now with a considerably heavier amount thrown into it.

Rearing back on her hind legs she rose up before slamming down on her talons to let out an ear-piercing eagle shriek, it was loud enough to make me step back a bit but I refused to cover my ears, they could handle the loudness and the resulting ringing effect they would later go through but for now this girl is about to take a lesson in Thaumaturgy 101: Don't. Fuck. With. Me.

As the she-devil screeched at me I grabbed my staff and started channeling my mana into it, surrounding the head of the staff was at first just a small stream of liquid fire, but as it continued its merry dance around the catalyst it began to grow larger in width and ferocity. By the time her screech came to an end the head of my staff was a veritable ball of liquid flames and they were none to pleased with the way this female beast was treating its creator so they have one purpose in mind with their concentrated mana flames.

To burn the she-demon to the ground and leave nothing ashes in its wake.

Once she has opened her eyes she saw me standing there, staring at her with vindication in my eye and a staff with her death in my hands, and before she has a chance to pounce on top of me to prevent my magic from blasting her away into nothingness, a cyan blur knocked me away along with my staff but it pre-maturely went off, forcibly shooting the fireball past the demon, out of Ponyville, over the Everfree Forest, and exploded on the side of the mountain leaving a fairly noticeable smoking crater of molten glass for all to see.

Smacking Rainbow Dash over the head with my still burning staff I pull myself off the ground and stare at the mountain side to see what the product of a fourth of my mana reserves has accomplished and I was proud to know that being somewhat lazy hasn't resulted in my magical powers to dwindle and weaken, hell I think it has even improved in this land since I first arrived.

"Now, whoever you are, since your little friend over there saved your life from meeting an early end you have been given a second chance, do not squander it by insulting me. Now, good day." I said with a growl before dusting myself off, used my staff to straighten my hat and with that I walked off to Fluttershy's place to see how Dizzy is doing, and maybe to check on the shy mare to see if she needs any assistance with her botany-related plants.

Walking from her to Fluttershy's place was relatively easy since it was just a straight path to her lovely cottage on the edge of an evil forest, but what made the journey slightly hard was the fact that I now had a few ponies whispering behind my back and even a few unicorns wanting to learn my magic from me. Apparently even unicorns want to know how to fight back against intruding beasts from the cursed woods and I have been thinking on giving them lessons on the lowest levels of thaumaturgy, for a price that is cause after all this type of magic is no joke and messing around with it can lead to death to the caster or those around the caster.

Seeing how my walk was now not interrupted this time I started a jaunty tune and hummed it along the way to Fluttershy's lovely abode, the tune was one that I heard while on a boat to Limsa Lominsa, those friendly pirates sure knew how to be upbeat when they know they were carrying a volatile magister in their cargo hold.

It was a little later in my walk did I find myself in front of the humble home of one Fluttershy of Cloudsdale but when I knocked on the door all I heard was a muffled whimper and an even quieter "Go away, please.", something I would never suspect the timid mare to ever say let alone use it at all.

I knocked on the door again but this time she said louder for me to go away but when I finally spoke up that it was me she quickly opened the door, pulled me in and slammed the door shut and from the way her eyes were rapidly moving, it was in fear.

Spending hours with Fluttershy was nice, apparently this girl loves to talk about her forest critters and pets, loves taking care of them, and most importantly she loves it when I pet and comb her mane and tail. That last one confused me cause I thought she would love her pets more then her mane but I guess she is just like those noble and rich girls back home...that or she is like all girls who care more about their hair then many other things but hey, I got to touch something softer then a chocobo's downy feathers.

"So Fluttershy, these chickens of yours, they all are well behaved and that they never try to run away even if they have a chance to?" I said while I was combing Fluttershy's soft pink mane, with each passing stroke I heard the buttercream mare sigh happily as she moved slightly closer to me to get the combing down faster.

"Mmhmm yes, all of them love it here especially Elizabeak." when she said that I snickered quietly which earned a gentle flick of her tail to my nose which resulted in my sneezing away from the shy mare.

"Well, whenever you want to know more about the wild critters from my home just ask me, I bet you would love to hear about a few of the more 'wild' carbuncles that roam all of Eorzea and beyond." I said softly before finishing one last stroke and placing the comb down on the table, pulling myself up along with Fluttershy as she wanted to see me out, thanking me for helping her feed her pets along with the gentle brushing. I should be thanking my brushing skills to the cat girls back home since they always come up to me for their approval of their stealth operations against the beast tribes outside of Ul'Dah except for the one that has taught me the true power past thaumaturgy.

I wonder what it would be like to teach these unicorns how to cast water for the first time...probably start a water balloon fight but without the balloons and every single one of them will be soaked to the bone. Too bad I couldn't trust them with a standard issue iron long sword created by a blacksmith let alone a magical spell that can be used to injure, maim or kill another being.

Patting the rim of my hat with a hand I padded off some dust that has gathered in Fluttershy's abode, my thoughts now focusing on the beast that had disrupted my good afternoon earlier but from what Fluttershy has told me that that 'beast' was actually Rainbow Dash's old flying buddy from school, was something called a griffon, a race that hailed outside of Equestria's borders and have on occasion fought over territories that they think is theirs. Apparently griffons are war-like and aren't very peaceful, they are separated into clans and very rarely would a kingdom rise up from the clans if they can managed to stay together for more then a generation or two before crumbling back into warring clans. That and when it comes to mating season then it would be best to avoid them, their females love to fight and if you can best one then that is technically asking for their 'talon' in marriage. I just hope that when I nearly melted that bitch of a griffon wasn't in her season cause I would take the eight-fifteen train out of here, no way I would marry her.

Even if I was threatened with death, I would still avoid the old ball and chain unless it was related to royalty or if it was by the slimmest of chances that if I don't marry then war would be declared.

Those are the worst to deal with. That and if they have a busted face, rather deal with a pretty bitch then a butterface.

But enough about my impending thoughts of self-devastation, I am thinking on why there is a large party over there at the Sugarcube Corner, and I wasn't even given an invitation to it! I mean sure when I had my first party here I was being competitive against Pinkie Pie for the snacks and sugary drinks but come on! A Lalafell's main weaknesses is something bigger then it that can easily crush then beneath a foot, and sweets, sweet, tasty, mouthwatering sweets.

My weakness to sweets is quite a condition really, I can't go a day without having at least one sugary snack inside my system and if I don't acquire any sugar within the day I go through something called 'The Rage' which basically is me knocking things over, punching people, biting people, setting unsuspecting people on fire, freezing unsuspecting people and lastly raiding the pantry of any guild hall I am currently in until my sweet tooth has been satisfied. Does get annoying sometimes but hey, if you don't want to see a crazed Lalafell chasing you with a staff while firing off bolts of magic left and right then just surrender the muffin or cupcake you are holding over to me so you get to live to see another day.

Knocking on the door to the party house I was met with the grinning face of one Pinkamena Diane Pie, and she was wearing a party hat along with a party blower and a slice of cake in her hooves. It still makes me wonder how these ponies are capable of holding things in their hooves when they don't have fingers or magnetic bits or...well...fingers really.

After being dragged into the party I slinked my way through the dancing and partying ponies, I somehow made my way to the snack table and once I was there I set my eyes on what was bestowed upon me and I smiled with glee under my coat as I saw the bowls of chips, cupcakes, candy, chips, muffins, punch, chips and more chips. Once I was at the table I grabbed a plate and just started stacking it with everything I could get my hands on without toppling my plate, bumping into a pony or drooling all over my food, and lastly not letting Pinkie know how much of my snacks I have on my plate.

"And now....om nom nom nom nom nom" I just started to stuff my face with whatever I had on my plate, the taste of a thousand sweets that hit my taste buds was beyond euphoric and I can feel my brain turning to mush.

It was about an hour into the party did I stop gorging myself on food, and it was mostly out of respect because a certain white unicorn mare was shaking her head at me in shame and it was that same mare that was going to be sewing me some new clothes even though I could easily make my own if my plants can grow fast enough in time. During my time at the party I heard a commotion going on, said commotion was quiet at first so I ignored it and went back to trying to pin the tail on the pony. It was when the commotion from the other side of the room got louder did I investigate who and what was the cause of the scuffle, but never did I suspect it to involve that strange beast and my friends, namely Fluttershy being screeched at and immediately cowering into a ball.

You could be mean to me, you could yell at me, you could attack me, but if you hurt my friends, especially the weak ones that did nothing to deserve the pain or wrath, then your about to find out how quickly a hell storm can be brewed.

Walking through the gathered ponies, trudging along a few and even having to crawl under many more who all either shrieked in surprise or are blushing furiously for me being so close to their bits and bobs, not like I have been anywhere close to a pair of them anyways.

"Gilda, please, just apologize to Fluttershy before things get out of hoof."

Being stealthy while collecting roots and flowers while giant beasts are nearby has given me glimpses of things I would rather forget.

"Why should I apologize to your marefriend for being a coward? We had a thing going Dash and you just throw it away for a bunch of soft-hearted pansy's, you used to be cool."

Anyways, back to what is happening currently, I kept moving through the crowd of ponies until I was at the front of the crowd and when I saw that all six of my main pony friends were there and they were giving the beast an earful of words and when I saw the beast look to Rainbow Dash for some sort of help or sympathy she got none, only a down casted frown followed by turning around and looking away from her. By the time the commotion was over I was now standing directly behind the she-devil and was about to say something when I felt her tail slap me across the face really hard, hard enough to actually turn my head to the right with my good eye looking at the crowds of ponies, almost all of them have their jaws open and even a few were whispering that they might need to call in the royal guards before things get out of hoof.

"Gilda, just...just get out of here, I can see that you can't change even if its for me. Just leave now, you've done enough damage today, and for that matter for the rest of your life. Your not my friend anymore."

Too late for that nonsense.

"Fine, if that's how its going to be then I don't need you anymore either Rainbow Dash. You can keep your band of dweeb friends and stay here in Loserville for all I care but I am out of here!" and with that little rant out of the way she turned around for her tail to slap me again across the face but this time in the other direction with my good eye staring at the bitch responsible for ruining this party, slapping me twice with her tail and now scaring my friends.

Standing there in confusion she just stood there and looked at me with a scrutinizing stare as I slowly turned my head back as I brought a hand to my cheek, feeling the bruise she left behind before looking at my hand then to the beast, she opened her beak before I could clench my fist in anger.

"And what do you want small fry, come to use your fancy magic to try and roast me like a plucked bird ready for the oven. Well not this time shrimp cause we are going to settle this like griffons, with our fists." and with that she grabbed me by the hat, lifted me off the ground a good two or three feet, then reached back with her arm before delivering upon me a good hay-maker to my gut and the strength behind the punch shot me through the front door and out into the streets.

What I didn't expect to happen was that the power behind that punch was strong enough to tear my hat off from the buttons on my coat tearing it off cleanly while at the same time, ripping the eye-patch from my face along with bits of flesh and hair from my eyebrows and my head. Pulling myself off the cobblestone road I felt around for my eye-patch, both of my eyes open with my left one being barely open and covered in blood from the sudden tear. Looking around on the ground I looked for my eye-patch but when I finally found it the small strand of raptor leather that was between my fingers was yanked away from me, my head staring up to see the smug grin of that beak of hers staring down at me.

That smug look of hers slowly turns into a frown as I start growling at her, my left hand covering my eye slowly gets wet as blood seeps between my fingers and land onto the floor, my right eye glaring at her as I bared my teeth at her, my hand body shaking in anger as I was starting to shake and seethe in rage.

"Oh did I make the little kid cry, oh boo oho, grow up and take your hits your little cry baby. And why do you even need an eye-patch to begin with, your not a pirate and its not that stupid pony holiday either so what do we have underneath this paw of yours." Gilda says with a sadistic glimmer in her eyes as she easily lifts me off the ground and tries to yank my hand away from my face, her claws scratching my chin and cheek in the process.

Keeping my eye shut as I slowly felt my hand get pulled away from my face, I can feel the cold afternoon air caress my face as the blood continues to drip down as I felt every single set of eyes settle on my face, seeing the closed left eye and the blood dripping around it.

"Looks like the little baby has a scar, I wonder if there is an eye underneath that flap of skin." Gilda coos at me and right when I saw her talons slowly come close to my left eye I clench my right hand and let loose, my fist soaring upwards as it connects with her bottom half of her beak, forcing it shut with an loud click and forcing the apparent griffon to let me go, both her talons gripping her beak in pain as I fall to the floor landing on my feet and stumbling backwards a bit, my left hand still covering my eye.

Staring up at Gilda I clench my fist again but this time I get into a fighting posture, my right arm raised at an angle to deflect blows that would come from my right side as my left arm was at an awkward position to somewhat protect my weaker side, my face scrunched up into one befitting someone holding pent-up rage along with a few stray tears mixing with the blood on my face making my face an absolute mess.

"You....you will pay for this griffon...I did not survive through fire and brimstone and the wrath of gods to be spoken down and beaten by a walking talking chicken. You will know what it feels like to feel the wrath of the Immortal Flames, and I will not relent in your punishment." I snarled out as the dazed griffon gets her bearings straight and sees me in my combat stance, shuffling from foot to foot with my arms raised, all of my training as a pugilist is about to pay off against a cruel beast instead of drunken soldiers and pirates.

Nobody moved an inch as all the ponies around us, plus one young dragoness who was sitting on top of Twilight's haunches watching me stand off against Gilda.

The first move was from Gilda who let out another of her eagle shrieks before getting on all fours and pounces forward, her talons outstretched with her wings extended, adding speed to her movements but her attack was predictable. Leaning back her claws missed by a hairsbreadth and her attack was followed with another claw which resulted in me rolling backs only to roll under the griffon and with lightning reflexes I reached out with my bloodied hand and grabbed her by the tail and yanked hard on it resulting in the girl letting out a strange chicken noise but I yanked hard enough to stop her in her flight path as she fell to the floor. Before Gilda can even retaliate for me grabbing her tail and yanking on it, I yanked harder which turned that chicken sound into a pained roar as I pulled with both hands, using my strength I gained from my times at the quarry gathering iron ore but this time it will have a better use, my strength was used to propel the griffon back into the air, over me and back onto the ground on the opposite side of me.

The sound of something snapping could be clearly heard as Gilda shouted in pain, her wings breaking from the impact as she rolled off of her crippled appendages, her amber eyes glaring menacingly at me but I ignored that stare as I rolled my shoulders and started my assault on the despicable griffon.

"Your wings may be stronger then that of a birds but they are still wings, they must be light enough to give you lift, and your body must be even lighter to get off the ground. Without your wings your nothing more then prey to me, and the predator says to the prey to run, fast, unless you want to be beaten to a bloody pulp." I snarled again, my eye glaring at the griffon as she gets back onto her paws and talons, her wings sagging to the sides but her breathing was what caught my attention, it was ragged, labored, and from the way those eyes of hers were half closed...lusty? That last one isn't right in the slightest, I got one non-Eorzean trying to court me I don't need another trying their hand...claw....talons...whatever the hell she has at trying to garner for my attention.

I do not know what makes these mares, dragoness, griffon and the ever so slightly two stallions be attracted to me but I really wish it would stop, I get enough attention at home with the princess of Ul'Dah trying to breach my trousers and my lovely Momodi probably worried sick about my sudden disappearance, hell I bet even that one Miqo'te in Gridania is still trying to get me to marry her, sure she can make a real mean cherry pie but come on, I want a girl that loves me for me not for my position or the large ass amount of gil I have stored in the bank.

"Seems like this baby has claws, but how well can you use them without rolling around like a little dog." the beaten griffon breaths out, but this time instead she ran to me and got on her hind legs, her claws raking downward as I raised my right arm to take the heat, her talons digging deep into my flesh as I let out a yell of pain but I still my tongue and growl out the rest, my anger serving as a pain killer but when I see her tail swing around to wrap around my leg I stepped back to feel the soft end brush against my leg.

Shaking my head at the griffon I lunged forward myself and let loose a flurry of punches, the very first thing my mentor taught me, my flurry of blows hitting the griffon in her unprotected chest, I can feel the muscles on that chest of hers before they got bruised from the impact along with the bones underneath them creaking.

That flurry of blows was followed by another but in a different style to Raptor Form, the ponies watching in awe and terror as they watched a little rotund person beat the stuffing out of something larger and stronger then them. 	One after another I changed stances and delivered a beat down of a life time to Gilda, who was dealing barely as much as I was giving, my uniform being damaged with long claw marks and a few beak holes where she bit me but even while me and Gilda fought each other, the other ponies didn't bother to step in for a number of reasons but the main one was that it was me fighting and they did not want to risk getting hit or set on fire.

Dodging one more talon swipe I reel back and punch Gilda right in the beak, my fist coming into contact and breaking it, a large crack running along the tip all the way to her head, it was the last thing she could take as she promptly wobbles in place, her legs giving out beneath her as she falls over in a heap of bloody fear and feathers, her breathing was weak and she had only one eye open, that amber color looking up at me as I stood over her, my own breathing was weak but I still had the strength to stand.

"Now then...what shall I do with you now..." I said, my breathing was a bit ragged and my left eye was now squinting a bit, a few ponies that were in front of me were leaning a bit closer to try to see what color it is but it isn't the color they should be looking for. Moving a bit closer I plop down beside the injured griffon, her eye still looking at me with both curiosity and fear. 

Sighing a bit I felt my right hand tingle a bit, a minty green glow coming from it and when I pressed my hand on her belly, which was soft for some reason, I channeled a piece of my mana into Gilda, my healing magic now repairing all the damage I have done to her during the brawl.

"What are you-" Gilda started to talk but I hushed her by placing my left hand on her cheek, not sure why I did that but I didn't care at the moment, I had an injured fighter in front of me and my training with the Immortal Flames told me to tend to them.

It was during my healing session with Gilda did I hear the sounds of hoof steps come from behind me and without even turning my head I motioned for them to come close with my left hand before I quickly placed it back on her cheek.

"Just relax griffon...just because I beat you to the point of death doesn't mean I would leave you to your fate...after all its been a while since I had a good brawl with someone that didn't know what they were getting into." I said before laughing a bit, my laughing was cut short when I started to cough, some blood coming out and landing on Gilda's fur, the dark red blotch staining it before it was burned away from my healing magic.

The silence between us, the ponies, the girls, and the Gilda was there but nothing was said, just me moving my hands over the injured griffon's body, fixing the broken bones, bruised muscles and the chipped beak was all healed with the power of my healing, my arcanist mentor would be proud to know that I did it right the first time instead of screwing up several times on a training dummy.

"And....done...test your wings girl before you high-tail it out of here." I said while wiping my hands on my pants, a few tears are here and there but I didn't care, as long as my 'patient' was able to walk, run and fly away I don't give a damn.

And just as I have asked Gilda to do she tested her self out, she walked around a bit but soon found that she has a slight limp in her step but it was barely noticeable unless you were actively looking for it. When she tried her wings she found that she couldn't fly at all, her wings were more injured then I led myself to believe but within time she would be able to fly again but for now she was grounded, and from what I heard from Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash, being grounded is a fate worse and/or equal to death.

That and walking around everywhere sucks major ass.

Golden Oak's Library, Night Time

"So she can't stay with Rainbow Dash because she can't fly and those two are at odds, can't stay with Fluttershy cause she screamed at her and is afraid of Gilda...Applejack would just buck her out and I highly doubt that even Rarity would let her stay with her and her sister...Pinkie Pie would probably lead to someone dying so that leaves us Twilight." I said as I hefted Gilda to my bed before plopping her down on it before turning to Twilight and Barb.

"But why is she staying in your bed?" Barb asks me with a hint of a jealous glare at the snoozing griffon.

"Because Barb she can't fit in your basket, I highly doubt Twilight wants to be anywhere near her, and I rather her in my bed up here then in the botany room down stairs." I said crossing my arms as I give Barb a raised eye-brow, my left eye once again covered with the raptor skin eye-patch and the bleeding has been stopped for now.

"I don't trust her in your bed Tatalito." Barb says while I tuck the sleeping griffon in, petting the soft plumage on her head before hopping down from the stool and started walking to the door.

"I know, that look your giving her is clearly one of jealousy or hate." I said with a smug grin as Barb sputters at my response, she manages to recover quickly before hitting upside the head with her tail.

"I am not jealous of a griffon!" Barb growls under her breath loud enough for only me to hear. I grin a bit as I headed towards the bathroom, a need to clean my wounds and remove the dried blood was strong with this lonely Lalafell.

"Yeah...sure you aren't jealous of a girl bigger and older then you." I shouted from within the bathroom as I turned on the shower as I started to strip myself of my torn clothes. Looks like I would be wasting some Grade 5 Dark Matter to mend the rips and tears.

As the sounds of the shower can be heard from outside the bathroom I can make out from the shadow on the floor that Barb was pacing back and forth, waiting patiently for me to emerge all squeaky clean.

I did not disappoint the youngling but I did disappoint her when I was wearing my pajamas that Rarity made for me.

I really hate that mare for making me a onepiece pajama with gloves and shoes.

Returning to my bed room I jumped back into bed, crawled under the sheets, made sure I was a fair distance away from Gilda so she doesn't accidentally flatten my ass if she rolls over, and drifted off to sleep land, hopefully to avoid anything stupid that might happen in the dreamscape.

Next Morning

"This is bullshit..." I mumbled as I was sandwiched between a sleeping female griffon and a sleeping female dragon.
> Boast This
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

	Staring up at the ceiling in my room I let out a semi-content sigh of relaxation and dismay as I am pressed on both sides by two females who I dislike at the current moment. On one side I had a griffon holding onto my left side, her beak was resting above my head as half of my face was buried in her chest fluff, and those feathers are tickling my nose and I am deeply afraid that if I sneeze now I will run the risk of getting clawed severely. Shuffling a bit in place I unknowingly nuzzled into her chest tuft and earned myself a pair of talons wrapping around me and pulled deeper into her chest to the point where my head has made contact with her soft fur and I could feel the warmth she is radiating and hear her heart beating.

When I was pressed into Gilda's chest I felt Barb from my right cling on tighter to me and was dragged along with me, the warmth being made by the two girls was enough to forget about the blankets but when I felt Gilda's tail slowly wrap around my waist and tugged at me even closer to her before I felt Barb's tail do the exact same thing but with one of my legs.

'Great, the one time I get two girls to be in the same bed with me are from another realm, different species and their both jealous of the other trying to claim me...'

Turning my head to Barb I saw that she was drooling on my shoulder and hugging my arm, she looked cute while she is sleeping like this but it puts me on edge that she was actually jealous of someone I just beat the living shit out of in front of not just her but pretty much all of Ponyville.

'I wonder if they are going to have me arrested for not only having a fight in the streets but also for nearly killing another being in front of both adults and children...'

Shuffling again I sigh again before reaching around with both my hands for a means of getting both of them to let me go so I could go to the bathroom and use it but at this rate I might just soil the bed.

Reaching around again I moved my right hand to grab Barb's tail which earned a quiet yelp from her and when my left hand grabbed something wide, a bit plump and warm and that when I gave it a squeeze I felt Gilda latch harder onto me and let out a bird-like chirp but when I turned my head up to face her I saw that there was a fairly faint blushing followed by a light piercing glare coming from her. I had no idea what I was grabbing but when I gave it another soft squeeze and earned yet another chip and another body squeeze from Gilda, and when she glared even harder at me I realized that my hand was touching something I shouldn't touching unless I don't value my life.

"I uh....sorry..."I whispered out since I rather not have a fire breathing dragon awake to roast the two of us, and Gilda seemed like she wouldn't be able to do much harm to me but things have been to known to not exactly go exactly as planned.

What I didn't expect Gilda to do was to grab the hand that was grabbing her haunch, and placed it back where it was and held it firmly there. When I felt that it was back where it was and that Gilda was still blushing faintly but it was steadily increasing in color and that there was a steady odor of something else forming underneath the sheets that I can't exactly put my finger on.

"If you t-try to move your hand again....I-I'll break it off...you understand twerp." Gilda whispered back but some of it was stuttered out, she had averted her gaze away from me as I felt her talon ease up on my hand just a tad bit but it was still there so if I tried to move it away it would be there in an instance to crack the bones.

Right before I had a chance to try and formulate a plan to get out of this situation, Barb has decided to make herself known my mumbling a few words before yawning, waking herself up in the process and tilting her head to see mine underneath Gilda's and the both of our cheeks a tint of red from blush.

Lets just say things started to escalate rather quickly for a misunderstanding.

"Tatalito...Gilda...why are your faces red?"

"Well Barb...you see its rather hot under the sheets and well...since your a dragon your used to the heat and can't feel it so...yeah....lets go with that."

"Y-yeah dweeb, just listen to the little chump for once."

"Hey!"

"Don't call my friend a dweeb your rat with wings."

'Oh shit...'

"What did you just call me you lizard!"

"You heard me you featherbrained fool!"

"Oh you are so going to get punched you little-" Gilda shouted but that was when I grabbed her by the beak, although I healed it up so that it wasn't broken it still hurt her when I grabbed it, and I knew it caused her pain cause she whimpered out and before Barb could laugh at her I grabbed her by the snout and squeezed it a bit to make her whimper out in pain also.

"Alright that is enough you two, it seems that neither of you are willing to stay in the same bed with me so I am going to have to leave this bed and sleep on the sofa in the lobby, until both of you can get along then I will resume sleeping their. If I find that either of you tried to move me back in my bed then I will move to my botany chamber. Do I make myself clear."  I said as I let go of both of them and crawled out of bed, grabbed my patched up robes, pants, gloves, boots and hat before leaving the room, closing it behind me as I ventured down into the lobby and found the sofa, now moved to a different spot on the wall that left me wondering who is moving all of our furniture around while we sleep.

Crawling on top of the sofa I laid down before placing my clothes beneath me, my hat resting above the lampshade as I placed my head on a sofa cushion and closed my eyes again, the sun was just barely coming up over the horizon which gave me at least two hours before I am required to wake up.

Morning

"Okay Twilight....remind me again why you are trying to make a spell that creates facial hair again?" I said with an eye brow raised as I munched on a piece of buttered toast, Gilda and Barb were glaring menacingly at each other while eating their breakfast, Gilda had cold cereal while Barb had some gems.

"Well Tatalito, this spell is just one of many I have been practicing on and well, I heard that the mares do love a stallion with some facial hair, just look at Big Macintosh, even though his beard is short at the moment a few of the girls in town turn their heads to ogle at him."

"So that is why whenever I walk with Big Mac that they were looking at him instead of talking about me behind my back." I mumbled as I finished off my toast bit, my eyes downcast slightly before I perk right back up at the thought of finally being able to keep my facial hair instead of having to cut it short due to Immortal Flames regulations on being able to see your face if your wearing a mask or a helmet.

Without further ado Twilight clapped her hooves together when I told her that I would allow her to use her new spell on me to grow facial hair on my face, and hopefully it creates a good moustache and beard combo.

With a flash of her horn and the look of utter concentration on her face, her horn glowed a magnificent purple before it erupted into a bright flash, blinding everyone in the room but her. When the sparkling lights in my eye were gone I felt something brush against my nose and as soon as I could open my eye without seeing stars or blue dots I looked down to see the upper half of my new moustache.

Moving my hands to my face I felt a moustache and as I moved my hands down my face I felt it go around my lips before ending slightly above my chin, and just below the center of my bottom lip was a patch of fuzz, a combo was created from that spell.

Reaching for the small mirror that Twilight had waiting for me I grabbed it and brought to my face, my eye widened with glee as I leapt in the air in joy as I started to rub and mess with my new moustache and beard, I was acting like a child again but I couldn't give two shits on what other ponies thought of me at the moment.

"You really outdone yourself this time Twilight, I am here barely for nine days and you have already taken a few of my ideas on thaumaturgy and arcana into practice and made a few new spells. You make this teacher so proud." I said with a fake sniffle, all of my miniaturized lessons on the basic fundamentals of thaumaturgy and the arcane have finally sunken into that thick skull of hers and she put them to actual use.

As I felt up my new facial additions I saw Gilda eyeing me a bit, a grin forming as I saw her wings ruffle a bit before that grin turned into a slight wince of pain but she managed to hide it to resume eyeing me up as if I was some sort of pastry. Wait, that is the same look I give to candy and muffins.

Fuck.

"Well Twilight, lets go show off your new spell to your friends but I can safely bet that Pinkie and Rainbow Dash will find a way to get you to make it into a liquid form to be used as water balloons to be tossed at unsuspecting ponies. But back to the topic at hand, lets go show this bad boy off and see the reactions." I said with a smug grin and I was already halfway out the front door before I was yanked back in by Twilight's magical grip. I struggled for a few minutes before I reluctantly eased up on the door and let myself get taken back inside to the lobby and Twilight worked her magic and removed my moustache and beard from my face.

I let out a sad sigh as she puts me back down and walked over to me and nuzzled the top of head, bending my hat a bit to do so but we were at least happy to know that her spell worked.

"You looked pretty awesome with that mustache you nerdy dweeb, maybe if you had some muscles and was a griffon then I would be all over you like a diamond dog on a cart full of gems." Gilda said with a waggle of her brows and a blowing of a kiss before she started to laugh at my expense while Barb is glaring again at Gilda while Twilight is just shaking her head in shame.

As Gilda laughed at me and the other two voicing their anger at her I just stare curiously at them, wondering what the hell is a Diamond Dog and why it would want gems, furthermore what does she mean that if I was a griffon that she would be all over me? What do I have that would make myself viable as a prime target for this female griffon? What is the griffon culture like? And why is she still eyeing me like that?

"Anyways...Twilight, since you have managed to master the basics I guess I could teach you some of the more base line mechanics of thaumaturgy...but first lets go outside, I got a feeling that if we do it indoors you might accidentally burn somebodies orange juice again like last time." I said the last part with a snicker as I clearly remembered the time when Twilight tried to make breakfast for me after the second day here in Ponyville, how she burned the orange juice will have me questioning her cooking skills for the rest of my life.

"Fine, but your doing the dishes when we get back."

"Oh lame..." I muttered as we walked out, Barb was happy to see that she wasn't going to be doing today's dirty dishes.

Ponyville

As I now know, Ponyville is a place where many different farming ponies come to sell their various wares to others at a reasonable price of one fruit or vegetable for a haggle able amount of bits or in my case, gil and boy do these farmers know how to haggle.

"That would be six bits, sir."

"Six? Are you bloody around the bend? These mangoes are easily worth four bits." I said as Twilight watched from a safe distance away from me, Barb was messing with her mane as I tried my hand at haggling, my lesson from Pinkie Pie about to pay off.

"Four? Whatever your huffin little boy but the price is six." the stallion behind the counter said in a gruff voice, his voice alone made me want to bash my head against a wall, it was annoying, overly rough and he was trying to rip me off.

"Four!" I shouted as I brought my face closer to the stall, the stallion on the other end moved back a bit before regaining his composure and moved back in my face to shout back.

"Six!"
"Four!"
"Six!"
"Six!"
"Four!"

"Alright then, four bits it is." I said with a hidden smug grin, quickly placing the bits that Twilight gave me on the table and swiping the mangoes into a small bag and quickly running off into the crowd of ponies, disappearing from sight almost immediately.

"Good, now get on out of here you little-....aw buck." The stallion said as he crossed his hooves in a shit-eating grin but as he realized that I switched the prices on him without the poor fool even knowing did he notice that I was already gone and he was down by two bits on that sale.

Walking back to Twilight I smiled and gave her back her bits and with the bag of mangoes I opened up the bag and passed to them one each. They all took a bite out of their mangoes and they all had a pleased look on their faces, something inside me said that they will be wanting more soon enough later on in the day.

As we continued to walk through the market district of Ponyville I saw that there was plenty of stalls selling various wares such as chocolate, flowers, corn, apples and other various fruits and vegetables. What I didn't get was that there are no armorer or blacksmith stalls here and that made me wonder what exactly do they use to protect themselves from the outside world cause the only time I saw a pony wearing armor or holding a weapon was Nightmare Moon in her pretty awesome looking armor, the normal looking ponies in their guard armor, and I think 'Princess' Celestia in her little hoof shoes, that tiara and necklace don't even count as armor.

Smirking a bit at the thought of a pony wearing real armor, the errant thought that they would be able to make mithril or even dark steel humors me, not once have I seen a single sign of mithril but from what Nightmare Moon was wearing, it could be dark steel or just a really dark shade of steel, either way these ponies armor is construct their armor is weak, hell I bet my staff could leave a nice dent in it with just a whack.

"So Twilight...any news from your princess about finding a way to return me back to Ul'Dah? I need to report about this back to the sultan and to the Immortal Flames about this discovery, and if we can replicate the means to re-create this portal and send diplomats through to talk about means of trade and peace." I said with a small grin, the thought of other Lalafell's, Hyur's, Elezen's, Miqo'te's and Roegadyn's seeing this I bet they would all flip their shit about this land.

"Well Tatalito, Princess Celestia hasn't reported back to me about how the portal to your home was created but she can safely say that she is trying to find every means there is to find a way to get you back home."

"Good, cause if I have to see one more impossible feat from Pinkie Pie I just might lose my last handhold on my sanity cause there is no way she can just stay floating in the air for a solid two minutes without any means of levitation and then magically vanish in a puff of smoke to only leave a solid black outline of where she was before that too left after her. She is breaking every single known law of physics and probably every law in the universe by defying gravity like that." I said with a hint of my sanity slipping away.

In the past few days I have been here I have witnessed Pinkie Pie disappear from plain sight, pull a cannon out of no where, pop out of mailboxes, out of potted plants and even from underneath a piece of rock from the road. How she can do all of that without magic or even without a horn is beyond me, I might need to bring in Mr. Rodgers to scan Pinkie for any hints of latent magic in her system.

"Pinkie?" Barb asks while still chewing on her piece of fruit, laying on Twilight's back while said mare was busy trotting at a steady pace to whatever our destination is at the moment.

"Yup, Pinkie." 

Still walking we came across a few of Twilight's friends, all of them said almost the same thing regarding that there is some sort of magician in town performing magic tricks for a small price from the crowd, but she is also challenging any pony to see if they can best her. This sounds like something I would do to shut her up but since she doesn't know of my existence, hopefully, I could avoid her and enjoy seeing these ponies try their hoof at shutting this pony up.

Squeezing through the crowd of ponies with Twilight and Barb behind me and as soon we got to the front row the rest of her friends were there as well, but this time I can tell that they also want this boasting mare to shut up and as for myself, if I have to hear her say that she can best anypony at anything I am going to gnaw my ears off so I would never have to hear her ever again.

"Does anypony think they have what it takes to best the Great and Powerful Trixie? Does anypony here in this little town have the guts to take on my great magic?"

"I swear if that mare keeps talking about her over-inflated ego she just might get off the ground and go into orbit." I said loud enough for her to hear it but since I am slightly smaller then the average pony she mistook it for one of my friends for my comment.

As she looked over at us to see who said that, I was busy trying to think of a way to shut her up but the means to do it so far elude me, do I bring out my little familiar from my time as a summoner or arcanist out to play, do I just juggle my thaumaturgy spells around to show her that I can do war magic and she can't, or do I just scare the hell out of everyone in town including this show mare by playing with metal and fire?

"It looks like we got ourselves a couple of neighsayers-" I started to laugh at that, I knew that these ponies used the sounds they make as the names of towns or words but that was just pushing it for me, "-out in the crowd, so why won't you come up and show to everypony that you can back up those snide remarks." the magician mare said while wearing a smug grin, said smug grin only grew wider as my friends made up their mind and tried their luck at besting the show mare at her own game.

Shaking my head sadly I watched my friends lose one by one, a few of them were very humorous but I must say that Rarity's was the best, her fur changed to the color green which apparently she doesn't like and she galloped off freaking out and one of the farmer ponies, her name was Carrot Top I think, she just huffed at that and trotted off to parts unknown.

When it was down to just me, Barb and Twilight I had decided to test my luck against Trixie and see if I can leave an impression on every single pony here that I am not to be messed with.

"Hey! Show mare! I can do something that you can't do!" I shouted while at the same time signaling for Pinkie to come over, I need her to help me with this little trick of mine.

"Oh really?" Trixie said as she slowly trotted up to me and from her vantage point on the stage she was taller then me by at least her own height and an additional body length from the stage, "Well then little kid, please regale us with your trick then, show me what you got." and with that she turns around and her tail slaps me across the hat. Now, normally I would just set someone on fire for messing with my hat and insulting me but this mare is about to be upstaged, one-upped, and then set on fire before being sent on her merry way.

"Okay then." I looked at Pinkie who was back to normal but was now standing next to me, "Pinkie Pie, do you know the location of the nearest forge and/or blacksmith store?"

"Yup! Its right behind the stage!" the overactive mare says in her usual cheery tone, and with me and Trixie looking behind the stage there was indeed, a smithy, right here in this town and I never seemed to notice.

"Pinkie, when this is over please give me a tour of this place again, I obviously can't find my way around here without some help." and with a salute from Pinkie I walked around the side of the stage and up the forge, Trixie waved her horn and with that the stage she is standing on moves out of the way for everypony in attendance to see what I am about to do.

Peering around I saw that the forge was in excellent condition, there is already coal loaded into the ore smelter, the billows look to be in working order and the smithing pony, who is standing in the audience, gives me what I can only guess is a thumbs up as I got myself ready for the next step.

"Pinkie, I need you to return to Twilight's home, go up to my room and grab my satchel, you will know if its mine because it smells like moldy paper and stale wine." and before I could blink she is back with my satchel in her mouth. I just stare at her blankly for a moment before taking the satchel from her mouth and placed it in front of me. "Okay, now I need you to work the billows and-" before I could even finish she is standing by the billows, her hooves resting on top of the wooden haft and with a smile on her face. 

Turning back to the audience I can see that a few have already lost interest in my act but now was the time to really set the mood and get even more to leave, cause what I have planned is going to hurt, me, a lot.

"Ladies and gentlemen, for the act I am about to perform I must warn you that if you do not like the smell of baking flesh in severe heat then please leave now, and those with the stomach to stand the smell then stay, and be warned, this is going to be really painful to me."  and before anyone could question me as to what I am planning I reached down into my bag and pulled out six large chunks of a brown colored rock before tossing it into the smelter and with a clenched fist I created a ball of fire and dumped it into the pile of coal and on cue Pinkie started to work the billows.

As the bubbly pink party mare started her part I waited patiently for the ore to start to liquefy and just as I saw the rock melt away I took a deep breath, focused my magic on one of my more advanced spells, the Apocatastasis but a modified version that would be allowed to be used on the caster himself instead of being limited to my allies, but at the cost of more mana and fatigue. When I casted the spell on myself I saw the ponies stare at me in wonder and awe, wondering what I just did but when I saw that the ore was in its perfect condition to be shaped and forged I took a deep breath, stripped myself of my coat and gloves along with my hat, letting everyone see the eye patch that was hidden underneath the left half of the face mask, a few gasped at my so called 'missing eye' but I paid them no heed on their sympathy.

With a deep breath and a quick pray to all the gods that this is a success as I make the plunge into the ore smelter. As soon as both my arms move into the molten ore I heard practically every single pony in the crowd, my friends, Barb and Gilda included, let out gasps of shock and fear for my health, thinking I have gone insane but when I took my arms back out they saw that there was barely any harm done to the small appendages.

I saw jaws hit the ground, they were astonished that not only did my arms come out of the fire unscathed but they also had every single hair on them burnt off to reveal silky smooth looking arms, something I now regret because not once have I ever had to wax my body, not even my moustache and goatee I recently had been given, something I will never have ever again because Twilight thought I looked silly in it. As the iron ore started to get to the point where I need it I went to my bag and pulled out an ample amount of bomb ashes, the highly combustible grey ash was then dumped into the smelter along with the iron ore, the two mixing together as I plunged my arms back into the thick sludge of metal and ashes, stirring the two components together and once the two were effectively mixed into one element I started to scoop the stuff into the hollow ingot containers, filling every single one up with the new metal and once it was all gone I wiped my arms off of any residual goop and placed it into a glass jar that I had within my satchel, the glass itself being able to withstand the heat of a pissed off primal and now it held to the brim molten steel.

"Now fillies and gentlecolts, from what I have learned from your resident librarian Twilight Sparkle, the metal being used by you ponies is pig iron, to my people that is considered cheap and readily available metal used for small town defenses or rudimentary plumbing pipes. What I am making right before your eyes, is something vastly superior to that cheap iron in every way possible. What you may think of it as a new brand of steel to be given to all of Equestria, I call it Heavy Steel, and the magic I just used to keep myself safe from the heat of the forge is a trade secret." I said with a smirk as Trixie just glares at me while at the same time be amazed that my arms are not a melted mess of missing flesh and bones.

What the crowd didn't know was that I was going to be making myself something I always wanted to do when I was in Limsa Lominsa for three months.  

As soon as the ingots all cooled down I grabbed some of my tools from my satchel and started to work the precious metal into the various pieces I will need to forge my new set of armor, and hopefully by the time I go to the Gala I can present myself in it, maybe even see if I can get Luna to apologize to someone dressed up as a knight.

"Pinkie, thank you for your assistance, you can go back to your friends now." and with that she gave a smug salute with her eyes closed before bouncing off back to Twilight and Barb.

Grabbing the Steel Doming Hammer from the inner satchel flap I flipped through the same section before pulling out some Steel Pliers, the tools of my many hobbies, and when I pulled them out I saw Twilight and Trixie get closer to me, watching me closely, even the smithy pony that allowed me to use his anvil, smelter and forge was pretty much up close to me, watching my techniques in action.

Looking for the nearest ingot box I searched for the one that was already cooled down thanks to the ponies development of a cooling block that fastens the production of ingots when needed, and for my purposes it actually lives up to its name. Popping the casing open I saw that it has completely cooled and was cold to the touch, something that I find amazing and once the bar was laying on the anvil I gripped my hammer tightly in my right hand and my pliers in my left before beginning my pet project.

As I worked on making the steel rings and plates I heard the ponies talk loudly amongst themselves, some saying how is a child even able to withstand the heat and pain of having ones arms in the molten mess that was the smelter and come out unscathed, a few even said that I might be part dragon and I can easily detest that I am not part dragon, I just used a spell that reduced the pain and damage I would receive to my body if it was fire, lightning, ice or water based magic, and lastly there was a quite a few even are planning on setting me up with their daughters. I don't know if they have arranged marriages here but if they do then I am not going to be accepting any kind of offer from these ponies unless there is a contact involved, I am allowed to read said contract, able to modify it so I don't get blindsided by some sort of loophole, and if I can see who I am getting the contract from.

"So Tatalito, I have been wondering for a while now..." Twilight said as she took some notes on the way I am hammering the first ingot into a solid plate, the flat square being perfectly flattened until I was done with it, placing it to the side before grabbing another ingot and repeated what I did to the first onto it.

"What have you been wondering Ms. Sparkle?" I said with a strained tone, sweat falling from my face onto the anvil, the purple unicorn bringing over a small towel and gently patting my forehead before going back to her notepad.

"I have been wondering, just how much stuff is inside of your satchel? Its like it just never ends and a few of the things you pulled out of it seems like it would just never fit in it without causing it to burst at the seams!"

"Well...there is a perfectly good explanation for that." I said as I saw Pinkie sift through my satchel, going 'ooooh' and 'ahhhh', seemingly she found some things she liked.

"And that would be lad?" the smith said, I later learned whose name is Blunt Hammer.

"When you reach a certain rank among Grand Company's, they will enchant your bag, backpack, satchel, whatever it is you use to store your things to be able to hold a quantity that would seem almost impossible for the desired object to hold."

"What is a Grand Company?" and there was the question that I was expecting someone to ask me sooner or later.

"It is basically the military of a nation that are united in common cause to avert imminent doom from engulfing their nation and during times of extreme strife, of all nations from going down under the flames. Each city-state is charged with gathering its resources under their banner of the elite regiment. At the commanders word, the companies all over Eorzea have begun to enlist able-bodied men and women to join their ranks regardless of where they are born and their social standing. After a while the same call that went out to the citizens of the three city-states soon went out to those beyond their borders, to the adventures of the world." I said as the Ul'Dahian was playing behind me and as I stood there looking off in the distance, and flowing behind me was the flag of the Immortal Flames.

As the music continued to play all four of us realized that there was actually music playing and when all of us turned around to see that it was Pinkie playing the music and in front of her was actually the Ul'Dah national anthem and beside me was actually my flag that was given to me for reaching the rank Sergeant First Class, in fact that flag is...the flag that goes on my chocobo's saddle.

"Pinkie...where did you get my flag...and my city's national anthem?" I said as I slammed my hammer down into the ingot, flattening it out before dropping it into the steadily growing pile of flat sheet metal.

"From your purse silly!" Pinkie shouted as a few ponies in the crowd started to laugh but when I glared at them they immediately silenced themselves.

"Its not a purse! Its a satchel! Big difference!" I shouted, in my defense I chose the satchel because its ease of access and the fact that if I was using a backpack I would have fell over backwards every single day.

"Tatalito, its a pur-" Rainbow Dash was about to say before I glared at her with venom in my eye.

"Dash, if you call my satchel a purse, I will freeze your wings solid for the rest of the day." I said before counting how many plates I have and feeling satisfied with how many I got I switched from making plates to making steel rings.

"Don't argue with him darling, we all know what he is capable of doing, we saw a firsthoof example when he almost incinerated Nightmare Moon when she returned, why I am still surprised by what he is capable of doing sometimes." I heard Rarity say as I smugly grinned, that mare really does have an eye for spotting things that sticks out, and if anyone was looking at my back they would see the most obvious thing there is.

"Anyways, now that all of that is out of the way..."I said with a grunt as I twisted some steel around, warping it to the perfect shape of a gauntlet, the metal glove was fully fitted to my hand alone and when I placed it beside me I started to craft the left one, a pair is not the same without its twin. "Is there anything else you ponies need to ask of me?" I said and of course Trixie was still slack jawed at the fact that my arms are not bones and on fire, Twilight and the smith taking notes and Gilda is staring at me with ever increasing levels of interest.

With both gloves now finished I placed them beside me and started to take measurements of my legs from the waist down, the Flanchards being a somewhat complex piece of armor since it integrates leg armor with boots and if I made even a smallest of errors in its construction it would hurt me when I wear it or hinder my full range of motion.

"Darling, just what are you planning to do with those measurements you just took?" Rarity asks as she pushed her way to me, her flank bumping into Twilight and the stallion to get through, both are a bit busy with taking notes to care.

"I am planning, Ms. Rarity, to make a Flanchard, it is the lower protective armor that covers the waist, hips, legs and feet in a layer of steel, and depending if I put materia in it then it will have different effects on it." I said as I started crafting the boots, the little booties coming along nicely.

"I never heard of such attire before." she said as I started to work on the shins, welding, shaping, melting and re-attaching metal on metal and when I got to the joints I had to work extremely careful otherwise I would have to start over.

"That is because Ms. Rarity it never came from Equestria or from any of the surrounding area, it came from the realm of Eorzea and that is from where I am from." I said before moving the knee joints around, ensuring that they work flawless and to my surprise there is no scraping noise or sudden stoppage during movement.

Continuing with my work I finished the Flanchard and gloves and soon afterward was the centerpiece itself, the mares and stallions were in awe when I finished it and after putting in the soft aldgoat leather and having it glued into the metal with some dandy horn glue, neither ponies asked what it was since I never let them see it.

"Alright fillies and gentlecolts, from the hair singeing ore processing to the pain staking armor making, I can now show you something that the so called Great and Powerful Trixie can't do, enchant armor." I said and without further ado I grabbed some aquamarine gemstones from my satchel before fusing some of my mana into my hands and gemstones before pressing each one into different sections of the freshly made armor.

As the heavy steel armor set started to glow an ominous icy blue glow I wiped the sweat from my brow before climbing into my new duds, the soft leather was cool to the touch and after fidgeting with some buckles I was fully incased.

"And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how you craft armor using steel, using elemental protection magic, and enchanting armor." and as I started to bow I forgot that this armor wasn't meant to bow in and that is when I fell forward, landing with a loud thud.

I felt heat start to burn my cheeks as the applause that was happening in front of me turn to laughs but when I stood up and started to slowly take off my new armor, feeling slightly disappointed that these ponies would laugh at someone that just showed them a new way to forge metal, two never before seen spells, and armor that is vastly superior to theirs.

"Hey stop laughing at him!" I heard Pinkie shout as she went over to me as I put on my wizard attire, my cap was the last thing to put on before I went back to the stage to wait for them to stop, if they wanted to laugh at me for just falling over then when there is a problem that I can solve then they are out of luck.

Sighing I just gave them all the middle finger before walking to the library and shuffled down the stairs until I finally reached my plants and just sat down near my cotton plant, it was already a small bush but with no usable materials.

"I hate this place...back home if I fell on accident anyone that saw me fall would have ran over to me and help me before asking if I am injured. Here they just laugh....freaking jerks." muttering to myself I watered my plants earlier then normal, my thoughts resting on Trixie, that mare practically bragged about how good she is and each attempt to stand her up ends with the pony and now Lalafell to be laughed at.

As time passed there was a knock on my door and it opened up to reveal Barb steadily coming down the stairs and seeing how this was her first time ever seeing all of this she was shocked to see so many plants growing down here let alone growing so quickly and so strong.

"Wow! Tatalito did you do all this by yourself?" Barb said with actual astonishment in her voice.

"Yes, I did, it took me a few days but hey, at least I have proved that you can grow something underground with artificial heat and light." I said light heartedly, my feelings still hurt from the laughter by the ponies but for now it didn't hurt as badly as it used to.

As we talked to one another my friends came in one at a time, talking to me, seeing how I felt, and all this other stuff but I just told them that I was fine, but internally I was mad at those ponies.

My anger only got worse when it finally hit night fall, and there was a perfectly good reason for me being mad.

I was asleep in my bed, on top of Gilda cause she decided to take this time to sleep beside me since I was alone in the bed and eventually she moved in her nap and with me in her talons I was moved around until she was resting on her back, wings fully extended out all over the bed, and with her tail gently and slowly moving back and forth between her hind legs as her front talons were holding onto me tightly. Me being hugged by the griffon didn't anger me, no it was the bloody racket going on outside that did the trick.

At first it was just a single lone thump that resulted in me nuzzling Gilda's chest, the second thumb was slightly stronger and I had to hug Gilda a bit tighter to hold on, but when it came to the third thump my eye snapped open, slightly bloodshot because I couldn't get much sleep and by the time I did manage to catch some z's I get woken up.

"Oh by Nald'Thal....what in the seven rings of hell is causing all that racket!" my tone slowly rising in pitch as Gilda woke up also, but after rolling off the bed with me below her.

Now you see, at this moment I would be so happy if it was of any race from Eorzea that would be on top of me but seeing that it was Gilda and she being a griffon...well lets just say that I haven't thought of other species in that kind of light yet.

"Get off of me!" I shouted and with a bit of roving hands trying to find purchase to get heavy butt off of me but of course my hands found something that they shouldn't have and in that moment I grabbed it as hard as I could and...

As I grabbed what I don't even want to know, the griffon above me let out a chrip before looking down at me with a rose tint to her cheeks and her tail was starting to thrash back and forth while purring quietly. I just stared at Gilda for a few seconds before immediately letting go and before I could say that I am sorry to her she just throws me out of the room, but not in the sense of being catapulted out, more along the lines of getting pushed out of the room by the top of her head while she didn't utter a single word.

But as soon as I got out of my room the thumping was only louder and by the time I got to the front door and opened it I saw Trixie running by and before I could trip her with an ice spell I saw a mass of stars and twinkling lights chase after her.

When I saw that mass of the night sky I had to go back inside, close the door, open it back up and see if I was just dreaming but unfortunately I was right, it was real, and it was chasing Trixie.

'Of course she would bring in a rampaging monster from somewhere to get the town to like her....well two could play at this game.'

Grabbing my staff I chased after Trixie, barely catching up to the mare and when I did I saw how pathetic her magic really was, I saw her try to shoot lightning at the beast but all she managed to do was form a small storm cloud before failing epically and with a sigh from me I formed my own lightning within the head of the staff, and once the crackling energy has reached its peak at maximum strength I waved it forth, there was a clap of thunder before a loud boom was emitted, the bolt of thunder leapt out from my staff and collided with the star beast, knocking it on its butt, which resulted in destroying her wagon.

"Now that is how you cast a lightning based spell." I said with a smug grin and as she started to back up I thought she was just going to run away for causing off this disturbance but when I turned around I saw why she was moving away, the star beast was back on its paws and as it came down I just stepped to the side and when it came down I was between its toes and just stared up before walking away next to Trixie.

Staring back up at the beast all I can think of at the moment is how in the seven hells did she even manage to bring this thing here and what did she do to piss it off?

Before I could question the trembling powder blue mare I saw Twilight Sparkle suddenly show up and as soon as she did she was levitating a fairly large tower and practically shoved it between the star beast's lips and it started to drink and before long it fell asleep and my purple friend levitated it all the way back from whence it came.

Once it was all over every single pony in Ponyville came out and many were scowling or saying hateful things to Trixie but that was when I saw the dumb dynamic duo and they said that they brought the so called 'Ursa Major' to the town so Trixie could beat it and since she didn't it proved that she is just a great big fake.

"So let me get this straight Twilight...these two went into the forest that screams evil," Twilight gave a nod as I continued "woke up a giant bear made of stars and cosmic gases..." she gave another nod "and managed to bring it all the way here without alerting the wild beasts of the Everfree to their presence and not once receive a single scratch or missing piece of mane?" and with that last nod I just went over to the two colts and conked them on the head with my staff.

"You two, start cleaning up the broken wagon first thing in the morning, then I want the two of you to apologize to every pony in town, and then I want you two to read a book on the dangers of the Everfree Forest, then to stay away from the forest. Am I understood?" I said as they both gave me a sad and slow nod, the two colts, Snips and Snails, trotted off in shame as I shook my head and sighed explosively.

"Twilight." I said as the world around me started to spin, my vision starting to get blurry.

"Yes Tatalito?" Twilight said as she looked over at me, worry was clearly written on her face.

"The next time something like this happens....please knock me out so I don't have to deal with it ever again." and with that I finally passed out from exhaustion, I had forgotten to turn off my elemental barrier as it had continued to suck the mana from me and until it finally caused a strain on my mind forcing me into an unconscious state, making the spell end.

I soon found myself back in my bed but this time I was curled up on my side with Barb trying to act like the big spoon and with Gilda acting like her big spoon.

'I hate my life right now.'
> Dragon meet Shy Pegasus
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

	'So tell me this again Mr. Yayalito how does one do that trick again? I am a bit troubled at the thought of what you had just done back in that tavern the other day.'

'Why Mr. Scarbrough, the trick to it is to have a really small scepter, a bottle of really strong ale and a really good sense of timing.'

'So that is how its done? I thought you just used a spell to create water and make it spew from your lips.'

'No, just a strong bottle of booze and a quick low grade fire spell to make one believe that you can breath fire. It works wonders on some of the wild beasts beyond the walls of Ul'Dah and the outlaying towns.'

'Huh, imagine that.'

'Yup! That is pretty much how it is but hey, its funny when you do it at a bar and when more than half the patrons are tanked.'

'That is true, but, for now my small friend I must be off, I need to head to the Copper Mines, we got a report that Bombs are returning in greater numbers and this time they have a few Imps in their number leading them.'

'Have they tried to attack Horizon yet?'

'They haven't tried yet but even if they tried to they wouldn't be able to get past the gate.'

'And why is that?'

'Because their numbers are dwindling fast due to a few of your brethren are making daily patrols out there.'

'I see....'

'Well then, I must be off, take care my friend.'

As my dream came to an end I let out a small stifled yawn before nuzzling the top of my sleeping partner's head and with a content sigh I hugged my partner a bit tighter and with a bit of a grumble the one I am hugging curls a bit into my grip before letting out a cute yawn as well. Feeling something wrapped around me I shifted around a bit trying to find out what it was but with a bit of a grumble and groan before feeling soft feathery brushes against my cheek and arm before stopping just beyond my sense of touch but it quickly returned when my head was then engulfed in warm fluffy goodness.

A week has passed since Trixie came in and pissed off Ponyville with her shoddy magic tricks and her two stupid worshippers that brought in a bear made of cosmic energy and magic into town and nearly wrecked the place, and if it wasn't for me distracting the bear long enough for Twilight to do her thing and get the bear out of here I would have feared that I would have to take drastic measures to keep these ponies safe from harm.

With a ray of sunlight to my eye I let out a low grown before slowly and gently opening my eyes before shutting them as I see the sun directly beaming its righteous fury down upon me in the form of sunlight.

Groaning a bit louder I shuffled a bit in my bed before hugging whoever is in front of me a bit tighter and pulled them in, the warmth coming out of his person is high and is a bit uncomfortable but I ignore it for now, just feeling their body being pressed against mine is enough to let a sigh of deep content out as I slowly drifted back to sleep.

My eyes snap open as I just realized that I went to bed alone and now have the feeling of two people sleeping in the same bed with me and with a look down I saw the green frills of a certain purple dragoness snuggling into my arms and without even needing to look behind myself I see the white feathers of a certain griffoness surrounding my head and with a bit of a shuffle backwards I can hear her heart beating and although it is quiet I heard the tall tell sound of purring.

'Oh dear Nald'Thal what did I get myself into this time?'

And before I could continue to question the situation I am in the sun's light disappears behind a cloud in which I am thankful for as I steadily went back to sleep even though I have Gilda acting like the big spoon with me being the little one and I was being the big spoon to Barb. Now that I think about it this is just one big cuddle bundle and a sandwich...a...a sandwich that I just realized that I am the guy between two girls.

'Why is Gilda sleeping in my bed? I thought she was going to use the sofa last night like she told me she would? I can understand Barb sleeping with me because she has a damn crush on me but this is just plain ridiculous.'

Rolling my eyes under their lids I just go back to trying to fall asleep and just as the lull of the dream land start to play its lovely music to guide me back, the sun decides to break through the cloud cover and fire its non-lethal beams right at my face.

'Oh god why are you messing with me! I need to sleep!'

Just before I could get up and close those curtains the sunlight goes away again but this time my eye sees something that is causing the disturbance of my sleep.

Dark clouds, rolling, pitch black, clouds.

'Is it supposed to rain today? I thought Rainbow Dash said that this entire week is supposed to be clear and sunny? What the hell is this then?'

Before I could guess as to why Rainbow Dash changed the weather for this week I felt Gilda press herself harder against me and I felt her hindlegs wrap themselves around my waist as her arms wrap almost around my neck and at that point I know that I had made a fatal error in letting her stay with us to redeem herself to Ponyville.

Thinking that what Gilda is about to do to me is going to be messy I steadily move my hand to one of her weakpoints and before I could press down hard on it the door to my room slams open to reveal a deeply concerned looking Twilight Sparkle.

"Tatalito! Barb! Come quick!" she shouted which not only woke up a sleeping Barb who let out a girlish squeal of terror before leaping out of the bed and as for Gilda well...you know what they say about scaring cats when they are asleep.

As Gilda fell backwards I felt her talons stab into my skin and I yelped in pain as her body squeezed down hard and we both fell backwards off the bed and into a pile of feathers, fur and skin.

"Damn it Gilda that hurts! Let me go!" I shouted as I thrashed in the griffon's arms and as I tried to wiggle out from her grasp she took the hint and let me go as she growls a bit at Twilight for disturbing her sleep.

Grumbling a bit I moved around my room picking up my mage's uniform I started to put everything on and as soon as my pointy cap graced my head I let out a huff of annoyance that my day off from doing anything in general was cut short because some purple unicorn barged in and said 'Come Quick'.

Taking my staff from the hook on the wall I gave it a brief twirl before walking up to the purple unicorn and as soon I was leveled with her back I saw her horn begin to glow and we immediately are sent down stairs where Twilight and all of her friends are waiting for us. As they started to talk about what it could be I look out the window and followed the smoke trail and from here I think it is coming from a forest fire.

"So Twilight...do we know what is the cause of that long ass smoke cloud that is floating on outside?" I said as I walked over to Rainbow Dash and raised my fist at her and she in returned raised a hoof and we bumped them together, our friendship at first was rocky but because of what I did when Trixie was here she saw me in a different light and she thought what I did was cool and seeing how Gilda is staying with me for the moment we all started to hang out, on occasion I had to create a blob of water to catch either of the two when their stunts go wrong. Dash just shakes herself off and she looks fine when she drip dries but Gilda, her fur and feathers puff up like a sponge and it is hilarious, for like a second before I get tackled to the ground and sat on until I apologize for laughing at her.

"According to Princess Celestia he is taking a nap, his snoring is what's causing all this smoke." Twilight says as I start to question how big of a dragon this is because for something to make a smoke cloud that large means that not only are we dealing with an adult dragon, but we are dealing with a really large and more then likely old adult dragon.

"What are we meant to do about it?"

"Give him the boot!" Rainbow Dash said as she hovered above Twilight before kicking the pony head statue and the egghead caught it in her magic field before quickly levitating it up as the rainbow pegasus flies underneath it and crashes into a bookcase.

"We need to encourage him to take a nap somewhere else. Princess Celestia has given us this mission and we must not fail. If we do then Equestria will be covered in smoke for the next one hundred years." oh snap, I knew that dragons hibernate for a couple decades but a hundred years of smoke overcast, yea I am not going to be staying in a place that will be having failing crops and constant winter weather.

"Come back here in one hour." and with that they all went their separate ways to gather what they need and as the flew off I went outside and placed two fingers into my mouth before letting out a sharp and loud whistle, and just after a minute I saw a yellow blur in the distance kicking up a dust cloud and as it got closer I saw that it was Dizzy heading this way.

As soon as my chocobo stopped in front of the Golden Oak he immediately sat down and waited for me to get on but when I told him I need to get a few things before we go on a journey to where the dragon is sleeping I had to bring the important things on this trip.

Running back upstairs I see that Barb has already left my room and is now somewhere else, probably helping Twilight pack her things for this quest, and as for Gilda she went back to sleep and I had to be a bit extra quiet as to not disturb the lioness and avoid getting clawed. Grabbing my satchel and placing it on myself I moved over to my standard and rolled it up along with a goodbye pat on the head to Gilda which she batted my hand away with her tail, seemingly conscious enough to do that but not awake enough to tell me to stop being a dweeb.

Coming back outside I placed the standard into its holder and with a leap onto my mighty bird steed we were off, running to the horizon only to stop when we spot Twilight and all of her friends waiting for me, and of course Rarity had to look nice for the occasion with a stylish hat and Fluttershy is sadly, shaking in place while making herself as small as possible, which is why I am standing beside her on my feathered friend to hopefully give her some courage to take this challenge head on.

As soon as Twilight started to inform the rest of the gang on what is going down I turned to source of the smoke cloud, wondering how long this will take and what is our course of action besides giving it a talk to move somewhere else when it fails.

"-get up the mountain by nightfall." I heard a small snippet of what my landlord said as the yellow pegasus quivers at that one word before she says it herself. I don't know how she managed to help defeat Nightmare Moon but even a Carbuncle could easily defeat her with just a cute stare.

"The dragon is in that cave at the very top." and with that Applejack and Rainbow Dash started to talk and then Rarity joined in by pulling out a pink scarf and putting it on, I couldn't help but snicker that a single scarf will help keep her warm and cozy.

At that everyone started to do their own thing, the girls were busy talking about what they are expecting what would happen and how much fun this might be, while Fluttershy tried to talk to Twilight about staying behind but that idea was immediately shot down when she said that Barb could easily take care of the her little critters. I thought it was funny that Twilight was going to let a small dragon tend to the wildlife that is Fluttershy's pets and expect everything to go well cause as soon as our fearless leader turned around and went back to map reading, a white rabbit leapt onto Barb's head and started to stomp before jumping off and scurrying away.

I thought it was hilarious to see a dragon scamper after the birds and mice to get them back in line.

"Alright girls, move out!" and just like that they all started to gallop towards the mountain with a screaming Fluttershy in tow, and as for me I climbed up onto Dizzy and like every other adventurer out there my chocobo reared back but as he did so I fell backwards and landed on my ass as he sped off after my equine friends.

To say I was not amused would be an understatement of the century.


Tall Mountain


"Whoa what was that?" I heard Rainbow Dash as I went over yet another hill, running after my own chocobo is embarrassing to say the least, especially when it runs off without you.

"That is what it sounds like when a dragon snores." Twilight said as I finally reach them, I am huffing and puffing, already out of breath and yet we still have a mountain to climb by nightfall, which leaves me with no breaks.

Finally reaching Dizzy I tapped his leg and when he realized that I am on the ground he makes a chirp like noise as a means to apologize but I just conk the birdbrain on the head with my staff before climbing up and strapping myself in to ensure I don't fall off again.

I am just going to say that going up the mountain wasn't much of a problem, it was trying to get Fluttershy to go up the mountain that was a problem. She kept freezing up or running back to cower behind one of the girls but what was the worst part was whenever the dragon snored she just faints and locks up. I swear if we have to keep stopping and going cause of one pony then I am just going to up to the top myself.

But sadly we all had to stick together and that means waiting for the buttercream pegasus to reach us so I sat beside Rarity and Pinkie Pie as they started to play tic-tac-toe and after the first twenty victories by the pink mare it got boring as hell and I ended up falling asleep on top of a rock.

'What did I do in my past life to deserve this kind of torture?'

Well whatever it was I sure as hell don't deserve this kind of hell but in the end it doesn't matter because the shy yellow pony just now arrived with my apple farming friend finally showed up and with that we were off yet again but this time I get myself secure away on Dizzy and once we finally got ourselves together we started to follow the only trail up the mountain.

As it turns out walking on a trail going up a craggily looking mountain isn't so bad, sure there is no wildlife to look at or is the mountain itself a pretty sight but hey, the view from up here is amazing, almost as good as an airship but still pretty damn good. Pulling out a small spyglass I turned to face the edge of the cliff and looked through it to spot Ponyville off in the distance to see a couple of ponies going about their day with a few on occasion pointing at the smoke trail or at the mountain we are on.

Putting away the spyglass I turn back and keep following after my pony friends, my eyes occasionally staring at Fluttershy who keeps flinching and stiffening up at the sound of a snore or earth movement and at one point there was a small gap in the path that requires one to jump across, I just climbed onto Pinkie's back and let her jump across, but I stayed on and failed to realize that she would be jumping back and forth that results in me feeling motion sickness and slowly starting to turn green.

I don't have a problem with flying or riding a mount but going by boat...yeah nope.

Once she landed on the side with the other girls I jumped off the bouncing pink mare and landed face first into the mountainside before peeling myself off the side and stood up to see a scared Fluttershy shaking beside Pinkie Pie.

Pulling myself off the dirty ground I dusted myself off and looked around to see that were only half way up the colossal mountain, I breathed out a sigh of relief because our task is almost complete.

"We will camp here for tonight." Twilight Sparkle said and once those words were uttered everyone started to set up camp, Rarity and Applejack were setting up the tent, Rainbow Dash the campfire, Pinkie was holding Twilight's map while Twilight was looking at the map trying to find us a route to the dragon, and as for Fluttershy, still scared stiff on the floor.

Once everybody else was busy doing their own thing I went to Dizzy and took off his saddle and allowed him to relax which he did by falling over and started to sleep in a lazy manner. As for myself I got started on setting up my own tent which is small enough for one person, me, and it would only fit things so in all it was the perfect tent.

"What a wonderful day to camp, the sun is out, the grass is green, the birds are chirping and a dragon is snoring loud enough to make a Primal grind their teeth in annoyance, can't this get any better!"

And sadly, it can't.

"Hey! Tata! Get over here real quick, we need your help with something." I heard Rainbow Dash shout at me and when I lifted my head out from the opening of my barely-put-together-tent I saw that she was having trouble start the camp fire. I don't know about these ponies but magic can easily make this job an easy task.

"Dash, scoot over, I am going to light the campfire."

"Whoa, I don't need help with that, I was gonna ask if you could help Rarity and Applejack, those two seem to be at it again."

"At it again? What do you mean?"

"Oh you know, Rarity tries to make Applejack all pretty and beautiful because she thinks that she has natural beauty while Applejack says no and tries to fight her off. It's like their typical tuesday night."

"Typical? They do this all the time?"

"Yup, whenever Rarity manages to trick her into coming over."

"Huh, remind me to never fall for her tricks, I think I can live without any makeup or frilly clothes being forceibly placed on me. I already fell for that trick before and I am not going to fall for it now."

"So what is that you wanted me to help them with?"

"Oh I just wanted you to break them up, can't be stuck out in the cold at night up here, us pegasi can endure the biting cold winds and temperature but everypony else can't, even you I think."

"I highly doubt its going to get that cold up here."

And just as soon as I said that a cold gust of wind blows by and it chilled me, this isn't the typical mountain breeze that will give you goose bumps, no this is the kind of breeze that makes you ask for a thick wool coat to not freeze to death.

"On second thought I better go bundle up before it gets too cold." I mumbled as I hurriedly ran to my satchel that was in my partially put-up tent and put on my store-bought heavy coat that I got from a village in the snowy mountains of Eorzea.

Usually I would only wear my Immortal Flames uniform, my Black Mage robes and hat, or even my day-off vest and shorts, but on this day and two weeks on the snowy mountain that is full of dragons, I am allowed to wear a thick coat that not only looks silly on me, but I had to shorten the sleeves, pant leggings and the coat itself to fit me.

The store didn't sell Lalafell-sized winter coats.

After putting on my coat I grabbed my large hat and before I had a chance to put it on I heard Rainbow Dash snickering behind me.

"Looking good there little guy hahaha."

"Do you want me to freeze your wings?"

"I like to see you try." and with that being said Rainbow Dash turned around before slowly taking off into the air.

Before she even got two fulms (feet) off the ground I cast a weak Blizzard on her wings and watched as her feathers locked up and hardened before the pegasus dropped to the ground with a thud.

"What the buck! Pipsqueak what did you just do!" Dash shouted as she tried to move her wings but they refused to budge an Ilm (Inch) in any direction. I simply smiled smugly at her before returning to my tent work.

"Well Rainbow Dash you did say that you would like to see me try, so I did although you didn't see it." I said over my shoulder as I inserted the tent pole through the loop before planting the other end of the pole into the peg, nailing the other end into the rock with a small hammer to keep it from flying away in the event of a powerful gust of wind comes by tonight.

"I didn't mean right now! Unfreeze them!" the rainbow pegasus yelled at me as I dusted my hands off and looked proudly at my handiwork.

"No, you should respect me more, if it wasn't for me you, your five friends, and possibly this entire world would be dead due to poor planning and a never ending night that would freeze this planet over." I stated as I finished putting my tent up, although I thought it was meant for one Lalafell it was actually meant for two ponies, I think I left my private tent back in my botany room and instead somehow snagged this pony tent...I was wondering why my tent seemed to be larger then it was meant to be.

"Well I-"

"Rainbow Dash, are you arguing with Tatalito again."

"No! I was just trying to get him to unfreeze my wings!"

"Tatalito can you please refrain from freezing my friend's wings solid."

"I can refrain myself from doing such a thing, but your friend must learn to respect those that are their elder."

"Pfft please, you are not older then me, heck you are younger then me by several years! Your just a colt!" Rainbow Dash shouted for all to hear, and in that moment I told my calm, peaceful demeanor to go screw itself because this mare is now in session and is about to learn a harsh lesson.

Grabbing my staff and slamming it into the ground I immediately cast a high powered but non-lethal Blizzaga at the rainbow maned pegasus, covering her entire body save for her face and ears. An entire spire of ice entombed Rainbow Dash from the back of her head to the tip of her tail, the sounds of five other ponies gasping in shock and of course there was a reason why for that. I had Rainbow Dash in an ice prison, forcing her to hear what I have to say.

Standing there beside Rainbow Dash was me, the magic within me flaring up to its highest point just below my breaking point, my usual mana color for ice-based magic has been replaced with a black and purple electrical cloud forming around me. The sheer amount of magic coursing through me is enough to create a synthesized gust of wind blowing my clothes back to give it a more dramatic pose.

"You will listen to me you piece of Malboro shit, you will not insult me, you will not prank me, you will call me by my proper name and my title if I ask for it. I am twenty-two years old, my people may be small and look like we are children but that is because that is the way we are, do not insult my race just because of our size. Do not dare even insult ME, you are not my friend and the only reason why I am not leaving you permanently frozen is because you are a friend of Twilight Sparkle, to me you are nothing more than an acquaintance so you are barely protected from my anger. I am an officer of the Immortal Flames, I am a practitioner of elemental magic and the dark arts and I am the only person here with enough backbone to tell a goddess to shove that horn where the sun never shines." I screamed out at Rainbow Dash, my one eye that all of them can see is bloodshot and is shaking, my voice cracking ever so slightly as I yelled louder then normal and my body shaking almost like a leaf in the wind. My left eye that is covered with the eye-patch is glowing a faint, unearthly purple color but for the most part can be easily mistaken for just a trick of the light.

"Do not my patience, you will fail." I firmly stated before slamming my staff into the ice prison, shattering it while releasing Dash from its confines before moving back and away from everyone.

As soon as Rainbow Dash hits the floor her friends come rushing to her, seeing if she is okay while I walk off and away from them to go clear my head.

I really hate being called short, doesn't matter who says it, a fell Lalafell,Hyur, Elezen, Miqo'te or Roegadyn or even the spirits that are within this world, I HATE being called short. I also hate being insulted or called weak or even someone insulting my people or the great city-nation of Ul'Dah, but for those that insult my family, or crudely remark my dead fiends and those that do will know pain unending.

Walking away from the gang of mares I walked to the edge of the mountain side and sat down with my staff right in front of me, the head of the staff was still chilled and coated with a layer of frost.

Letting out a sigh I cross my legs I place my staff out before me, letting it rest on my lap as I started to silently chant to Nald'Thal, hoping that he hears my chant and offers me some sound advice, that and a means to return home.

"Um Tatalito....can I speak with you for a moment....if you wouldn't mind." a shy, timid voice said from behind me, I only needed to hear this voice to know exactly that it is Fluttershy.

Without even needing to turn around I waved her over before resuming my quiet chanting.

"I-I don't mean t-to be a bother but...why did you do that to Rainbow Dash? I-I heard that she angered you but did you r-really have to do that? Couldn't you have j-just tell her to stop?"

Turning my head slowly until she could see only the side of my face with the eye-patch and she was immediately silenced as I stood up and slowly began to walk to her, and standing behind the timid and scared butter yellow pegasus mare are the rest of the girls with a cold, shivering cyan pegasus mare who is glaring at me.

"She needed to learn that insulting other people can always come back to bite you in the ass, just because you are a national hero for defeating a fallen moon goddesses with the assistance from someone that was pulled in from a different dimension against his will, doesn't give you the right to start talking down to someone else."I said as I kept my eye on Fluttershy, my temper slowly started to die down.

"I know she didn't mean to-" Fluttershy started to speak to me but I cut her off by talking.

"It's Rainbow Dash, she doesn't mean to do anything because she always acts before thinking, if she used her brain more often than just running that mouth of hers then there would be less crashing and more getting work done. If she actually ever thinks before acting then I wouldn't have to freeze her" my biting words making the timid pegasus lower a bit but she stayed standing up.

"I know that she is very sorry for-" I cut Fluttershy off again, continuing on with my rant.

"I won't accept her apology on your behalf, she has to say it herself and she has to truly mean it. I know I told you all and the rest of Ponyville that I hate being called short, you should have taken this to heart when you saw a few times of the mares and stallions that I have used my weak non-lethal spells on." I stated as I look over to Rainbow Dash who is still glaring at me but it weakened a bit, either from the fact that what I am saying is the truth or that she is really considering that apology.

"Well can you-" I cut her off one last time with the wave of my staff near her muzzle.

"I will still help you girls deal with the dragon but I will not talk to Rainbow Dash until she either apologizes or until I grow bored with this punishment. Good day, Fluttershy." and with those words done I walk past Fluttershy and then the rest of the girls before heading into my tent and waiting for nightfall before actually falling asleep.


Morning


"Come on girls, we are almost there!" Twilight shouted as we resumed our climb up the mountain after we took down camp, put water on the still smoldering embers of the campfire and went on our way.

I was still not talking or even looking at Rainbow Dash, I was still mad at her and she knew it because I gave her a private talk this morning. She doesn't talk to me and I don't talk to her and I just might forgive her for the offhanded insult.

"Twilight, do we know how big this dragon even is?"

"Not really Tatalito, seeing how its creating enough smoke to cover the sky I can safely say that this dragon is a few thousand years old or just barely entering its thousandth year."

"So its pretty big."

"Yes."

"Perfect...a giant dragon...I doubt it will be easy to remove from its slumbering cave."

"Have faith in us Tatalito, Princess Celestia has entrusted us to remove this dragon and so we must!"

Rolling my eye I keep on holding onto Dizzy's neck hoping that the worst of the cold weather is over but sadly it only keeps getting worse as we go up, I now envy these ponies for if I had a warm coat of fur I wouldn't be freezing my ass off here.

I don't know how long it took us to get all the way up to the top but we did it, even though it is very cold up here and that I now need to keep breathing hot air into my hands just to feel them, the gloves are starting to get frosty.

"We finally made it to the top! Now to get that dragon to move out of here!" Twilight proclaimed just as we reached the last lip of the mountain, the seven of us cresting over the top and finally onto the landing of the mountain.

"Finally, I think my butt is frozen solid....going to need a roaring fire to warm myself up after this." I grumbled out, rubbing my arms with my hands to transfer some heat into them.

"Want some hot cocoa with that?" Rainbow Dash snickered underneath her breath, hoping that it was loud enough only for her friends to hear but I was listening in and I was not pleased with her, not one bit.

"I am going to haunt your dreams Rainbow Dash, sleep lightly tonight." I growled out, I am starting to regret that I didn't haunt her dreams last night just to teach her a lesson.

I heard a quiet meep from behind me and I knew that it was the cyan mare, hoping that nipped her underhanded talk in the bud I turned my attention to the colossal dragon sleeping and snoring in the cave in front of us.

"Wow...that is one big dragon...are you sure this is the right dragon?" I said as I looked at the dragon, I know that I have enough magic to probably kill this dragon but I highly doubt that I would have enough time, distance and skill to pull it off without dying in the process.

Looking the dragon over I can safely say that this will not end well if we anger him while he is sleeping, that is one thing everyone of Eorzea has been taught as a youngling, never, ever, wake up a sleeping dragon.

"So Royal Pupil of the Sun Goddess, how do we remove such a fine beast of the sky and earth from its home?"

"We will wake him up and ask him to leave!" Twilight said with a smile on her face, thinking that plan will work without fail.

I promptly turned around, went away from the mouth of the cave and hid behind a rock beside Dizzy.

"Tell me how it works!" I almost shouted just as I duck behind the rock waiting to hear the sounds of screaming mares running for their lives.

I didn't have to wait long for that, as I hid behind the rock with my staff in my hands and my list of arcane and thaumaturgy spells at the ready as the head of my staff starts to crackle with mana. As soon as I heard Twilight start to talk to the sleeping dragon I heard a loud snort followed by ponies being blown all the way out of the cave and land right beside my hiding rock.

Peeking around the side I looked down to see the six mares all in a pile of waving limbs and shouting mouths, I find it funny that the plan of talking a dragon into leaving peacefully would not work, especially when the dragon is about to enter its hibernation sleep.

"How's it going down there?" I said with a smug smirk with my arms crossed, the six mares managed to untangle themselves from each other before dusting themselves off while Twilight gives me the stink eye.

"Oh hush it, we can still do this." Twilight hissed at me as I shrugged and went back to hiding behind the rock.

Giving her the go ahead I went back to hiding behind the rock and soon enough they get tossed back out but instead of landing in a heap they are galloping for their lives with the exception of Fluttershy who flew as fast as she can to the rock I am hiding behind and hides with me. Rainbow Dash on the other hand is staying besides her friends but its for the protection of the spells that Twilight offers.

"Well I guess its my turn."

Walking around the giant rock I look up to see an enraged adult dragon as it comes thundering out of the cave with murderous intent in its eyes. I almost brown my trousers in fear.

Gathering my courage and mustering enough stupid bravery to do the task at hand I look up at the dragon and raise my hand to stop the dragon's advance, hoping that it doesn't step on me. It turns out that it did see me because it stopped in its tracks and looked down at me, lowering its head before allowing me to speak.

"Hail dragon!" I shouted at the top of my lungs as I slammed my staff down into the ground, to the untrained eye or those that are not hyper-sensitive to magic then they would not notice the fact that I am already weaving magic into the stonework around the dragon.

"Small folk, why do you dare stop me from chasing down those insufferable ponies for daring to awaken me from my slumber." the dragon rumbled out his worlds, I found out it was male not because of its plumming down below, it was simply its voice when it spoke that did the trick. The dragon stopped moving and looked down at me as he spoke, I knew my plan is on the verge of failure simply because of his size alone.

"Because my dear friend that those same insufferable mares were just trying to get you to relocate to another mountain to have your hibernating slumber away from pony held lands to prevent an ecological disaster on a colossal scale." I said as I kept on weaving Blizzaga runes all over the cave, every single one of them pointing at the dragon, all primed and ready to go as soon as they are placed. All over the floor and walls are barely seen glittery runes, the dragon could possibly see it but so far he hasn't shown any sign of knowing that there are runes all over the floor.

"And why should I care about the lives of these bothersome ponies? They are small and numerous, they will simply breed back the numbers they have lost over a few decades." the dragon rumbled back at me, I can see his eyes slowly glaring right at me before going to the ponies.

"My dear foolish dragon friend, if you do not move your smoke will cause the crops for miles to fail, ponies to starve then die, and the sun and moon monarch will not be pleased with the lives of their precious ponies being cut short because of your lack of empathy for others, and they will surely remove you by force if you do not heed to their wishes." I shouted back, my mana weaving is so far working, he hasn't detected it yet.

"Bah! Those stuck up, pompous pony princesses do not have the stones or the power to remove me from my new home, and I highly doubt that you have any power at all to stop me either, so what are you going to do about it, tiny beast?" the male dragon said before lowering a claw near me.

"If you do not take the diplomatic route of accepting Princess Celestia's request to move away from here then I will be required to use force against you." I stated with blinking an eye.

"I will sleep where I please! There is nothing that you nor your precious pony princesses can do to stop me." and with that said he used that claw that was near me and in one motion flicked me out the cave and off the cliff side.

'Well...this didn't go well.'

As I fell off the side of the mountain, I saw the big blue sky slowly get further and further away, the rushing of the wind blowing by me as I watched birds fly by and clouds slowly roll around, its such a beautiful view, its too bad that its the last I will ever see ever again.

'Nald'Thal, I am ready for death.'

I watched as I fell further down the mountain the ground turning from its soft grey rubble and dirt to its more signature brown color and before I could even feel for the last time, something rams into my body sharply, changing the direction of my fall before making me go from looking at the sky to looking at a rainbow mane and cyan fur.

"Easy there small fry, I gotcha." the same snarky, nasally voice that I had told off not even a day ago spoke up and I knew exactly who it was.

Turning my attention from the rainbow mare to the mountain I watched as we rapidly approached the summit and as soon as we landed the dragon was still there but was taking swipes or breathing fire on my friends.

"Girls! We got to get out of here and tell Princess Celestia!"

"No, you won't have to."" I said from behind the five of them before rearing my left hand back, a powder blue of mana glowing within its core before I slammed it down, my staff still in the rock beside the dragon's foot reacts exactly as the way I have wanted it too.

All of the ice runes within the cave go off at the exact same time, rapidly exploding into a barrage of crystalline ice, the same thing that happened to Rainbow Dash just happened to this dragon, but only temporarily, this type of trap is using too much of my mana supply just to keep it going let alone keep its strength up.

"You! How dare you hurt my friends like that! You could have seriously injured somepony!"

"I got flicked off a fucking mountain! How is that not seriously inj-" I almost shouted before getting muffled by Twilight and Pinkie Pie, obviously they didn't want me to ruin whatever it is that Fluttershy is doing.

"You should be ashamed of yours, abusing your power and height to get what you want, don't you know that your smoke is dangerous to everypony that isn't a dragon and you are just not caring about them."

"But I-"

"Now you apologize to Tatalito right now for flicking him with your claw and think about what you have done."

"I....I....I'm sorry."

"For?"

"I am sorry for flicking you off the mountain."

"I am going to mur-"

"Apology accepted! Now go think about what you did." and as soon as Fluttershy said that was the exact same moment that my mana started to run out and to prevent myself from passing out from over-using my mana pool I stopped channeling everything I had into the multiple spells and at once all of the ice shattered like fragile glass sending ice shards everywhere, allowing the dragon to sniffle back a few tears before leaving the cave and flying off the summit and away from us.

At this point I was just fuming, I was trying to get two words in edgewise but sadly these ponies prevented me from doing so and as soon as the dragon is gone and out of earshot did they allow me to finally speak up.

"What the heck was all of that about! It was an adult dragon! Probably older then both Princess Celestia and Princess Luna and you expected it to actually listen to her demands! If this mission actually went south I would have ended up as a flattened bloody pancake on the floor and the rest of you would have been eaten! Do any of you have any idea how hard it is for me to not want to conk you all on the head for how stupid this idea was! I almost died back there while the rest of you were up here screaming your heads off! I swear its almost like Celestia is just watching this happen from afar with a telescope laughing at us!" before I could go off any further on my rant we were already down the mountain were quickly approaching Ponyville on foot, I walked the entire way to Ponyville instead of riding on top of Dizzy's back.

"Tatalito, I think you should just give up on your little rant, just believe in whatever Princess Celestia has to say and believe in her actions, trust me, she would never steer us wrong."

Sighing angerily I pinch the bridge of my nose before leaving the house and walked all the way to the only bar this town has to offer, traded in four gil for a large glass filled with hard cider and drank my troubles away.

'I swear this ponies are driving me to drink.'
> Pony Sleepover
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Pheew, trimming up the wild ends is harsh work, hows your end of the tree AJ?"

"Lookin' good sugarcube, lookin' real good." Applejack said from her side of the tree that we are pruning together, we have to get this tree and several others before tonight's thunderstorm arrives and so far with our track record we are well on our way to completing it early. Just the way I like it, finished early and without a single mistake.

"Well if I do say so myself this looks marvelous!" the two of us overhear Rarity speak up as she apparently finishes up her trimming and when we look to see how good of a job she did we see something entirely unexpected of a prune job.

What we see is a pony-esque shaped branch with a little glittering bow attached to it, and several more throughout several other branches.

"Rarity, we were supposed to prune the branches not beautify them." I said as I took another snip at the branch I was working on before getting off the ladder and taking a look at my handy work.

"I know that but sometimes I just can't help myself, they do look better than they used to am I right?" Rarity said as she levitated over a pair of sheers and a couple of ribbons behind her, it makes me wonder why she would even bother to take those things when she knows it will all be blown away in the ensueing gusts of wind and harsh rain.

Rolling my eyes I pulled up the scroll that was in my coat pocket and looked over until I stopped at the last line on the list and crossed it off before putting it back inside my pocket and started to walk home until I felt a drop of water touch my forehead.

Moving my hand to my forehead I touched the wet spot and pulled back to reveal a water mark and when I looked up at the sky I saw that the thunderstorm has arrived but it arrived four hours earlier then scheduled. God, damn it Rainbow Dash, can you please stick to the provided schedule instead of rushing it?

"I guess we better hurry up and finish whatever tree is left, Rarity and Applejack, you get the tree that is near Sugarcube Corner while I'll get the one near Ditzy's home."

"Alrighty then sugarcube, we'll get this done lickity split." Applejack says with a wink at me before turning around and trotting off in the direction of Sugarcube Corner while Rarity took a few moments to maker her latest work look appealing even though it will be blown off and away in a matter of moments.

Turning away from the two mares I quickly ran over to the last tree on my list and when I arrived I realized that this is going to be easier then I expected because it was already mostly done by the breeze.

Placing the latter down and climbing up I pruned what little I could find that already hasn't been removed and after a few minutes I snip what I think might be the last branch and swept it up before placing it into the nearest green-recycling trashcan before checking it off my list.

"Well, looks like I get to go home early, I wonder how the other girls are doing." I mused to myself as I finished the last of the pruning on the tree, for the most part I am just glad that I get to go home early, Gilda hasn't been much help with this work since she saw me return home hurt with a few broken ribs when the dragon flicked me, that was easily cured with a healing spell on my part as Twilight watched and wrote down what she saw. Silly mare thinks she can learn a spell by watching it happen, you have to read a book that has been offered by your instructor, have said instructor lead you through it and then practice it, several times without fail then you have learned a new spell.

Once I have crossed off the last tree on my list I immediately went home and on the way there it started to rain steadily at an even pace and as soon as it started to come down I started to run fate, almost slipping on the slick road and falling down but I caught myself and kept on running until I arrived at the Golden Oaks Library and opened up the door just in time to see Barb wearing her signature pink heart apron with a tray in her hands, cups filled with pipping hot, hot chocolate and for a moment I could have sworn that there was small marshmallows floating around in them. My favorite drink on a cold, stormy day right beside Firebrand Whisky, god save your soul if your a light weight cause that will ruin your day.

Stepping into my temporary home I wiped my feet on the welcome mat and placed my coat on the coat rack beside the entrance and walked over to the sofa and sat down only to realize that there isn't a single talon grabbing me and that is when it hits me. Gilda said that she would be spending some time with Rainbow Dash to try and patch up their friendship, I hope it works cause I am tired of being forced into a spooning position against my will.

"Hmm....this place feels empty now that Gilda is at Dash's place..."

"Well Tatalito she can't be here all the time."

"I know that, but its a bit sad that she can't, I am starting to like her presence even though it usually ends with us fighting or arguing."

"That's gryphon politics and social life or you."

"How do you know this about the gryphons?"

"Oh, I asked her while you were gone and I also read a few books on gryphon culture, you know that in their culture it is the male gryphons challenge the father of the female they wish to date and/or their talon in marriage, and if they win they prove that they can protect and take care of the female gryphon in question. It changes depending if the parents are still around or if they are using the old customs."

"That seems somewhat familiar to the way the beastman out in the deserts find their mates, but I think they end up just forcing themselves onto females because they are nothing but savages, the gryphons seem like civilized predators. But I don't see why this concerns me."

"Remember how you got in a fight with Gilda when you first met her?"

"Yea, I broke her beak, some bones and her wings, why do you ask?"

"Remember what I just said on how they ask for their talon in marriage or even for a chance at a date?"

"No." I said slightly worried, I can see where this is going and I am afraid of what my purple friend is saying.

"Yes, I think that she has an eye on you, and I can gaurentee you that she is trying to earn your attention."

"How can you know?"

"Because she gave me a letter yesterday, she asked me to send it back to the gryphon capital to her parents. Its easy to put the two together."

It took me a while to figure it out but as soon as I did I started to sweat so badly that one can probably mistaken it for me being wet for falling in a puddle.

"No, there is no way that Gilda is seeking approval from her parents for either of those two options! If neither of you two have noticed I am not a gryphon let alone looking for a relationship at the moment. What would the point be if I was in one only for me to go home back to Eorzea, there would only be heartbreak and sorrow if I got into a relationship with anyone right now if I go home." I said as I tried not to think on Gilda having a crush on me, first off we are different species, second off I don't even think she would ever see me in that kind of light and thirdly the size difference between us is ridiculous!

It is not like I keep several vials of Fantasia on standby...

Lastly, I don't think my pride can take it if she see's what I look like naked, there is a reason why we are sometimes called small lovers...sometimes I wonder what my life would be like if I was a Hyur or a Roegadyn, at least I would be big and not be insulted for being tiny.

"Oh come now, I am sure it can't be that bad." Twilight says as she looks down from her book to stare at me, apparently she can't get the hint.

"Twilight, I don't think you understand, it won't work, trust me, it just won't." I said as I grabbed one of the steaming hot mugs from the tray, the young dragoness is in the kitchen, I can tell that she is in there because she is humming loudly.

"At least give it a shot." Twilight says with a mischievous wink before bursting out in a fit of giggles.

"No, a culture that is based on violence isn't something I want to be a part of, especially if I have to break bones and nearly kill someone in the process, that is barbaric." I said, I may have my violent tendencies when my anger spikes or am in a no-win situation but I am a civilized man, we duel in the streets with swords to settle our problems. I rather keep it that way. 

"Then if your against having a relationship at all then why are you allowing Barb to sleep in your bed? If you are so against it then why do you keep letting her do that then?" Twilight asks me as I fidget in my seat.

I know that at any time I can kick Barb out of my room and back into her old bed with Twilight but I don't, I need her near me at all times, I need to hold her while I sleep, I need to make sure that she is alright while she is asleep beside me, no fits or nightmares, just peaceful dreams, I just can't tell her or anyone else for that matter, its only for myself to know.

"Because Twilight...I like her and I am afraid of losing one of the few closest friends I have, she reminds me of myself, hard working, small, has a charm to her that is like my own, she is smart and funny, knows how to cook, is better at me in cooking, and lastly....I think she is pretty." I said as I give Twilight a few reasons as to why I keep her nearby but I just can't give her the main one as to why I can't let her away from me.

"Oh really? Well all I can say is that if your going to ask my little sister out you better make yourself better by not being so rough around the edges, and maybe wash the dishes around the library more often." Twilight says in a smirk-filled grin and I realized what I just walked into, she tricked me into revealing my feeling for the young draconian lass.

Smart student, you may very well outpace your master, but now lets see how you can handle somethings you are not meant to know.

"Well Twilight, if I do start dating your younger sister should you be expecting wedding bells soon after? I do not know much about your culture when it comes to dating and maybe afterwards marriage, but I do wonder if they are even connected in some fashion or manner of path?" I said as I smuggly grin back as Twilight sputters and nearly does a spit-take with her mug of hot chocolate.

Before Twilight could answer me Barb finally walks into the room with a small tray and on it is a bag full of the large marshmallows and beside the tray is a bunch of sticks. I think what Barb is trying to recommend is for us to make smores or cooked marshmallows...either two are nice and for the wealthy but here it seems like its for the common person, how quaint.

"What are two talking about?"

"You see Barb, are friend here likes y-ipe!" Twilight started to speak up but I cut her short with a weak spark of electricity to her flank causing her to yelp out in minor pain and rub the sore spot where I have zapped her.

"What Twilight was trying to say is that we are talking about that I like mangoes, seeing how I get them every chance I can and well, they are pretty good, wouldn't you agree?"

"Oh, well mangoes are okay but nothing is better then a well taken care of sapphire, those things are amazing!"

"Remember Barb that not all of us can bite into a gemstone without breaking our teeth. Though I have licked a gem once I didn't exactly get that 'tasty' vibe that you can get."

"Maybe you should try transforming yourself into a dragon, I am sure that Twilight has a spell book that can do that around here somewhere."

"I highly doubt that she has access to a species-changing spell book in her arsenal of tomes here in this library, am I right?"

"Actually I-" Twilight was about to say that she probably did have a spell book like that lying around here somewhere when someone kicks the front door open.

The one who kicked the door open was actually two dam looking ponies, well one less damp-then-the-other, Applejack being more dry then Rarity for having her hat, and neither of the two look very happy to say the least. Grabbing a nearby towel on the coffee table with Barb in tow we went over to the two wet ponies and tried to dry them off only to be stopped by Rarity levitating the towel out from my hands and for Applejack to shake herself dry like a wet dog, I guess that is one way to make oneself dry.

"Welcome Applejack and Rarity, how did it go with the last tree?"

"It was goin' great until little miss froo-froo here had to make it look all perty even when it was gonna get all wet in ta first place."

"I couldn't just leave as it was Applejack! I had to make it look absolutely fabulous, and besides you were the one who kept trying to cut it off with those sheers, it would have made a disaster!"

"Rarity, its a tree in a small hamlet, now a tree growing in a royal garden, nobody is going to care on what it looks like besides you." I said as I took a sip from my cup of delicious hot chocolate, and I can say that this is amazing.

"There is no need for us to be uncivilized brutes like those diamond dogs out there beyond Ponyville or like your friend Gilda, Tatalito and here I thought that you were a cultured pony and not some ruffian."

"Miss Belle, I am a civilized Lalafell, but sometimes I can choose to be one that perfers hard work and grueling labor, it builds character, something that you are forgetting or lacking. Behaving like a noble and actually being noble are two different things Miss Belle, in case you have forgotten while you are busy talking to those nobles the other day from that spoiled city you ponies have for a capital." I said as I stood up and eyed the ivory mare, her well-maintained curled mane is drooping a bit from being slightly wet from the rain but as I stared the white mare down it drooped even more.

"You believe that nobility would get you into the upper crust of society but you know nothing of the sort, nobles, no matter of what rank or status amongst each other, they will always be looking for a way to undermine and cripple those that they hate or oppose them, they will dig up dirt, blackmail you or worse threaten those you love and care for just have an advantage over you and to use said advantage to topple those that they hate more. It is a never ending game of chess, those that play it often fail and never get to try again and those that do are forever changed for the worse. They will visually look the same but on the inside they are cracked, maybe even broken, their goals changed and checked, constantly trying to outmaneuver others at their own game and those that fail will fall by the wayside will be forgotten, never to be spoken of or head of again. You may think that nobility is that of being the best, the brightest, the greatest the world has to offer and yet its not that, nobility is chaos, a gaping pit waiting to swallow us all." I said as I went from looking at Rarity before going back to my cup of hot chocolate before drinking all that is left which is sadly the entire cup before placing it down on the table and walked off to put on my sleeping pajama's.

"Ouch, your going to need Mrs. Redheart's pain relief pill for that one." Barb says as the rest of them see the look of shock on Rarity's face, I guess I just broke her purist thoughts on what nobles really are, hopefully.

I had several chances of being a noble back in Ul'Dah but I never took that chance, all the times I spent in court as an Immortal Flame agent, I always overhead the plans and schemes of the syndicate members, of the servants and guards discreetly talking to one another, a game for a throne that none of them can hope to gain because none of them have the power or the guts to overthrow the sultan...a sweet Lalafell lass that strives to keep us all safe from the dangers of the wastes around us all.

By the time I return back to the lobby of the library I see that Rarity and Applejack have settled in and started to enjoy themselves but as soon as I return they see me heading down to my botany room and for a few minutes I am not seen until I come back up holding my journal and a quill before plopping down by the fire and started to write.

"You and Applejack should totally sleep over! We'll have a slumber party, I always wanted one of those." Twilight says as I see a few strands of her mane pop out of place, I wonder if this is a bad thing.

'Slumber Party? A party to sleep? That makes about as much sense as throwing an egg in the middle of a hurricane with the wind blowing right at you.'

The response I was expecting to hear from Rarity would be an overly polite way to say yes but what she said caught me slightly off guard.

"Oh uh goodness, erh uh I do believe that I have another engagement scheduled for this evening but it completely slipped my mind just now ha ha ha...oh silly me. I can't possibly stay here all night, with Applejack." Rarity says as she looks around to make sure that Applejack wasn't around to hear that and apparently she wasn't, I wonder where that farm mare went.

Pfft wow, what a bitch, say that behind your friends back why don't you.

Watching Twilight quickly trot to the bookcase behind her I see her horn light up just as a book on the shelf glow the same color and levitate off its shelf and down between both herself and Rarity.

"Slumber 101, all you will ever need to know about slumber parties but you were afraid to ask." Rarity said aloud as I started to write down what happened two weeks ago, the dragon sleeping incident, my recover of a week and a half from broken ribs, so far if this journal ever gets home I just hope that it gets to either my parents first or the Immortal Flames.

"My own personal copy! It's a fantastic reference guide, you should see the table of contents! I've been waiting for a chance to use it and today's the day! This is going to be so great!" Twilight excitedly said as Rarity looked like she had made a big mistake.

'Run mare run! This is your only chance to escape!"

But instead of running like an sensible person would do, she just laughed in a fake manner and accepted her fate, while Applejack who I can now see is outside in the rain trying to clean her hooves off with a hose and sprays herself in the face...classy.

By the time Applejack came back inside I was busy watching the two unicorns apply some sort of facial makeup to their faces, a strange greenish muddy, ooze thing, and Applejack spoke exactly what was on my mind but not using my colorful vocabulary.

"What in tarnation." I wish she used my words, it would have made it a whole lot better.

"Now wait a garsh darn minute, you make me was the mud off my hooves but its okay for y'all to have mud all over your faces?" you know Applejack you have a point there...but then again I am only a man so I don't know much about you ladies and what you do in your off time, except for Twilight and Barb, one reads books the other cleans around the house.

"Silly, this is called a mud mask, its refreshing and it rejuvenates your complexion." if I knew that then all the times I was face first in the mud when training with the Immortal Flames was actually for something instead of getting my ass handed to me.

"We're giving each other make overs! Eeh he! We have to do it, it says so in the book." Twilight squeals in joy as I look at Applejack and silently plead for her to run and to take me with her.

"Oh hey would you look at the time-" 'Oh god damn it Applejack take me with you!' "-I gotta skedaddle along home quick I am late for somethin' a uh...good night!" 'You traitor!' as soon as she tries to leave the library a random bolt of lightning goes off and scares her back inside. "Or maybe I'll stay here for a spell."

"Hurrah for slumber party!" Twilight happily says as she claps her hooves while Applejack gives an uncertain frown, me on the other hand...

'NO! Applejack you doomed us both!'

Before Applejack even had a moment to think on what is going to happen, she take a mud ball to the face before Rarity comes up and starts to apply the so called 'facial mud mask' to her.

Sighing in defeat I put my journal down and lock it before going over to the mares and sit down, if I am going to suffer through this I might as well enjoy it while I can before the ensuing insanity of it all comes kicking in. 

"Uh Tatalito, I need you to remove your...eye patch so I can put on the mud mask." Rarity asks me as I cross my arms and give her a flat stare with my working eye.

"No." I plainly say as Rarity puts down her mud mask bowl.

"But if you don't I can't-" Rarity tries to speak up but I cut her short.

"No." I say again, I hope this mare knows when to accept no.

"But why not?" Rarity tries to ask me but I just give her a simple answer.

"Just no, work around it." she better take the hint while she can.

"Ugh! You are so insufferable sometimes." 

"I try my best Rarity."

For a moment it felt strange but as she kept applying it I felt it feel normal, it was alright, once you get used to it.

"-do everything by the book and it will make my slumber party officially fun!" Twilight say as she claps her hooves, I guess if it works in the book then it will work in real life, if it doesn't then this will be a learning experience for all four of us, Barb is busy ignoring us all, reading a book on 101 Ways to Cook with Gemstones.

"Did you hear that Applejack? You wouldn't want to ruin Twilight's very first slumber party, would you?" Rarity said as Applejack backed up a bit, wow they are really going to be doing that here, of all places and times.

"Of course not, and you wouldn't either I reckon." Applejack said back, those two are straight up spiteful of one another.

"So we have an agreement." Rarity says with a weak smirk as she stares down the farm mare.

"You bet'cha." Applejack says as she wears a smirk of her own, and for a good reason.

As soon as the two came into an agreement I watched Applejack spit into her hoof and Rarity visibly blanched away from her in disgust.

"Applejack, you know there is messy and being just rude." 

"You know there is being fussy and there's plain getting on my nerves."

I can just feel the heated tension in the air, they almost want to kill each other but sadly I can't let them do that, they are the national hero's after all.

Watching those two snap at each other Twilight gets in between them, not knowing what is going on, and hugs them both before talking again but I tuned her out a bit as the storm outside started to pick up.

"Soo, how are you getting along over there Applejack?" Rarity said as I relaxed on the floor, my hair is too short for her to do anything to it so I was spared of the hair curlers, Applejack on the other hand...

"Just fine, Rarity." Applejack said as she gave the look of a wet cat to the white unicorn.

"This is so awesome hehe! Make overs, check! Oo, it says here we have to tell ghost stories! Who wants to go first?" Ghost stories you say? He he he oh this is going to be good!

"Me!" Applejack shouts right before I ever could. Well it looks like I get to go next, oh the stories of the Copperbell Mine outside of Horizon will probably scare the shit out of them.

It turns out Applejack's ghost story is just an underhanded snip at Rarity, not much of a story but it did have its charm. Rarity's was just as bad as Applejacks, both of them taking snippets out of each other until the lights go out.

"Now its my turn, this story is all true, back home, beside my hometown of Horizon, outside beyond its walls is the Copperbell Mine, it provides Ul'Dah with all of its iron, copper, zinc, and tin ore for its metalworking purposes, within that mine worked and toiled the various races of Eorzea but most importantly it was worked by the Lalafell, my people. Every day the miners worked, they sweat, they shouted in glee at the finding of a motherlode, but when the sun rises at noon at the center of the sky, when the clock rings within the hollowed land, the miners stop working for the beasts of the earth come out and play. On that fateful day all of the miners hear a low moaning from deep within the mines, 'Who pushed me into the abyss.' 'Who killed me for that gold?' 'Why did you betray me?', the spirits of dead miners long ago trying to talk to the living, trying to find justice but it never comes, they never find their peace, they always search, always. The ghosts are unrelenting spirits, they are always searching for you, always looking for your soul, they can hear you breath, hear your whimpers, they always know where you are, and they will never, stop, hunting you down." and as soon as I stop the lights turn on, with me standing behind all of them and they all scream in terror.

As they all calm down Twilight comes from behind them, hugging the two.

"Who wants smores!" I almost wanted to shout 'ME' but I refrained myself, I am not a child anymore...but the child within me is shouting for smores.

Watching Rarity slowly make a single smore is a painful experience, it looks extremely easy to make and yet she takes her sweet time in making it.

'Girl I will wreck you if you don't pick up the pace, it doesn't need to be perfect, just done right.'

Applejack has the right idea, she just slaps it on between two cracks, a chocolate bar and eats it or she forgoes the smores itself and eats the marshmallow by itself while its still hot, that takes an iron stomach to do, I could do that too but I rather not burn my throat when I swallow it.

"This may seem messy but we are not at a royal party nor are the royal authority here so I can by messy this one time."

"Yeah, you just eat them." and just like that Applejack ate the freshly made treat as I did a soft clapping notion, applauding the farm mare for doing what was needed to be done.

As soon as Applejack finished eating the smores, she let out a minor belch, the same one would make if they had something amazing but not too filling to make it glass shattering and atrocious.

"You could at least say excuse me." Rarity complains as I pinch the bridge of my nose as I let out an explosive sigh, much like the same whenever Rainbow Dash decides to do something when she is told to.

"I was about to but you interrupted me, pardon." Applejack says as I realize that if these two don't kill and make up then all is lost.

"-now the next item on the list is truth-or-dare." Twilight said and as those words reach my ears I realize that I might be actually doomed here.

'Oh shit...Nald'Thal protect me.'

"I dare Applejack to do something careful and neatly for a change." Rarity says as I realize exactly what is going on.

Shots fired.

"Oh yea? Well I dare Rarity to lighten up, to stop obsessing over ever, little, last, detail, for a change."

Shots returned.

"I think the truth of the matter is that somepony should stand a bit more attention to detail."

"And I think the truth is that somepony should put in so that somepony can get some things done."

I don't even know what the hell is going on anymore.

"Um, I don't think that is how the game is supposed to work. You have to give an honest answer to any question or do whatever anypony dares you to do."

Oh fuck me side ways...

"I dare you to step outside and let your precious, tidy mane get ruined again." Applejack says which earns a gasp of shock from both myself and Rarity. That is just cold Applejack, I would just tell her to let that mane of hers go unkept for the rest of the night after messing it up.

With a downward glare I watched Rarity slowly make her way out the front door and stand in the rain, she is not pleased and as soon as she comes back inside I felt a bit sad for her, only a little bit but it was there.

Standing back inside Rarity was completely soaked, her mane is ruined, waterlogged and laying limply on the floor.

"Okay then, I dare Applejack to play dress-up" oh no...this won't end well. "-in a froo-froo, glittery, lacy outfit." Rarity says as she walks up to Applejack right up to her face, oh the evil in those eyes right now.

It takes a while for Applejack to get up the stairs and even more time to put on her outfit, but while she is doing that Rarity looks at me as I contemplate what I am going to do to her.

"Rarity, I dare you to stand still while I dry you off."

"What? That isn't much of a dare."

"It is when I am using fire magic to dry you off." I said as I grab my staff and walk up to the dripping wet mare."

"No wait! Please!" was all Rarity could say before I used a heating spell on the mare, and at that moment I realized I might have made a mistake in the matter.

Almost immediately all of Rarity's fur and mane puffed up like angry cat, her mane and fur was standing on end, fluffy and adorable but the ungodly glare she is giving me is something to fear.

"Uh...."

"You will pay for this."

"Want me to get you wet again so you don't have to look like this?"

"No, just get me brush...I'll fix it."

By the time Applejack came back down Rarity was somewhat back to her old self but her mane and tail are still uncurly and are now just flat and de-curled. When Applejack stopped before us I at first thought it was just a trick of the light but when Applejack coughed to get our undivided attention I actually had to look away because I was blushing.

And I never blush...hardly blush when its a friend that is dressing pretty, but Applejack pulls it off so well. Her mane is done in with a few tight curls, straightened and pressed, her outfit may be a bit gaudy but it is something that royalty or a high ranking noble would wear but to see a simple farmer wear it and make it look beautiful, I just had to look away because I was not worthy.

"Do I ever get a turn?"

"Oh yes, go ahead."

"Okay...*cough cough* Tatalito, do you have feelings for Barb?" Twilight said just as Barb entered the room, this time holding what looks like a scroll of sorts and when she heard that question I realized that I am doomed. I can't lie because I know that Applejack will see right through it and Twilight probably has a lie detecting spell and if I tell the truth not only will they know but I have a inkling of a feeling that Barb might get more bold and brazen if she hears it from me.

"I, I do have feelings for Barb and that is all you are getting out of me." I said as I closed my eye, crossed my arms and looked away from them.

As soon as I said that they all started to squee happily, clapping their hooves in joy while Barb blushed deeply and looked away from me, holding her spaded tail in her hands as I tightened my grip on my staff.

"Aww! Isn't that adorable! I can already hear wedding bells!" Rarity says as she starts to prance around.

"You talk about a wedding about us two in my presence and I will hang you by your own mane in this very tree. I highly doubt that Barb is even close to my age let alone even want to marry me." I said as I looked outside the window, I can't even look at them because I don't want them to see me blushing.

After everyone has their laughter filled up we all moved onto our next thing on the list but sadly Applejack and Rarity goes back to snapping at each other, the ceasefire was wonderful while it lasted.

They were daring each other to do the exact opposite of what the other liked, no rodeo if it came to down, be forced to go into the rodeo when it shows up, don't brush your mane a hundred times, brush your mane at least once, I swear they are bickering and arguing like an old married couple.

"Uh...what is this, pillow fights?"

"Pillow fights? A battle with pillows, that is no way near as entertaining as fighting with snowballs." I said before taking a pillow to the face, falling backwards and landing on the floor. Whoever threw that pillow has an excellent throwing arm.

"Oh please, I am not at all interested in participating in something so crude." Rarity said before taking a pillow to the face as well, some feathers fly out of the pillow upon impact and as I get back up, with a pillow in hand I glare at Applejack who is smirking as Rarity and myself stare her down.

"Oh it is on!" and like magic the pillow fight began, pillows were being tossed left and right. Rarity and Applejack threw pillows with their mouths by grabbing the ends or by kicking them. I grabbed two pillows and ran down the middle, jumped in the air and threw both of my pillows at Rarity, both hitting their mark which was her face but she retaliated by getting a large pile of pillows and launched them all at me. I was consumed by the pillows as I flew with them before impacting against Applejack, it was chaos, pillows were being tossed and no one knew what was going on.

Applejack started to use her lasso to hurl the pillows at us, Rarity using her magic to throw them at a high rate.

"Oh I get it, pillow, fight!" Twilight says just as she gets pelted with pillows, in all it was her own fault, she is standing in the middle of the warzone.

"Uh girls, maybe you should take it down a notch." Twilight pitters out as her eyes go all swirling from the impact she has taken.

"I will if she will." Applejack says as she tilted side to side to easy avoid Rarity's poor aiming skills.

"She started it." Rarity says, dodging Applejack's barrage of pillows.

"And I am enjoying it!" I said just as I get knocked down again but this time landing on top of Twilight who softened my landing.

Pulling herself out from the pillow pile which forced me back onto the floor, Twilight spat out some feathers that was in her mouth as I got back up only to take a magically hardened pillow to the face.

"Girls, maybe we should just call it a night."

I agree on this one, I don't think my face can take any more hits.

Once everything has settled down and calmed down enough to the point where we are not tearing each others heads off, we went upstairs and went to bed, I went to my room as Barb joined me and immediately clung onto me before going out like a light once her head hit the pillow, as for Twilight she just passed out as well. But Rarity and Applejack, those two kept on arguing even though it is roughly almost midnight, and I can clearly hear them quietly yelling at each other.

"Keep your muddy hooves on your side of the bed."

"My hooves ain't muddy."

"They were, they might still be a little bit on them."

"There ain't, see."

"Eww."

"Now who is being inconsiderate?"

"I have to make the bed so the blanket will be right, get up."

"Hey!"

I just stared at them, with Barb clinging to my back and drooling a little bit on my right shoulder. I was able to hear them across the house, behind a closed door, and I couldn't sleep while they argued over a stupid bed arrangement.

"Uh uh uh! You'll ruin it, you'll have to do it like this."

"Yeah, that's not gonna happen."

Applejack did a little shout before jumping onto the bed, launching Rarity out of it and taking the blanket for herself.

"Hey! You did that on purpose."

"Um, yea?"

"Get up so I can fix it again."

"Can't hear you, I'm asleep."

The fake snoring started and in that moment I prayed to Nald'Thal to give me the strength to not murder my friends in the same room as by best friend and her younger sister.

"I ain't budgin'."

"You will if you want any blanket."

"Give it back." "I will not." "Yes you will." "Wont!" "Will!" "Wont!" "Will!"

"Enough! IT says right here that -" I just tuned her out at that point, how could you even bring that stupid book up at a time like this? I am tired, I am sleepy and above all else I have a young sleeping dragoness on my back who is drooling and I swear she is starting to talk in her sleep about me.

Then Applejack and Rarity started to fight again, I swear if this keeps up then I pray that something bad happens just to make everything better.

And just like that my prayer was answered with a lightning bolt striking a tree right next to our house and when we all looked out the window I could only facepalm in anger, I can't believe these people made me pray for a problem to happen.

"You see, thats why we needed to take own all those loose branches in town. Not spiffy them up, now if you excuse me times a wastin'." Applejack says as she grabs her lasso and runs over to the window, if I think what I think she is thinking then this plan might work perfectly.

I expected this plan to work perfectly but instead it wasn't, Rarity tried warn Applejack to not do it but the farm mare outright refused her, instead she lasso'd the tree branch and tugged it so it wouldn't fall onto the neighboring house which is great cause she saved someone else but its not so great cause she tugged it a little too hard and caused the tree branch to come soaring straight into the room.

"I tried to tell you that it would come crashing down in here!"

"Well you shoulda tried harder!"

"Oh would you two shut the fuck up! By Nald'Thal's beard you two bitch, whine and complain the entire night about each others flaws and mistakes! Give it a rest already, we get it you both hate each other for being the exact opposite on the spectrum but for once, tonight just work together to help remove this bloody tree branch out of here!" I shouted at them as Barb let out an adorable yawn before going back to sleep.

"I'm sorry! Your annoying attention to detail would have saved us from this whole mess."

"Bit its icky!"

"Why I...Yes, icky is a part of hard work but ya'll need to get over it, I can't fix this mess on my own."

And just like magic Rarity got over her irrational fear of icky dirt and mud and helped remove the tree branch by transforming it into several cute ornaments, and as for the tree trunk itself, Applejack removed that by picking it up and dropping it outside.

That was solved way to fast and way to easily...

Once everything was over I immediately went back to bed but first I placed a sign on the door before closing it and falling on my bed with Barb still on my back, how she can sleep through all of that noise and motion I can never guess but it must be a useful skill to have.

The sign clearly reads 'Do not Open the Door, Do not say a peep, I will turn you into a newt if you disturb my sleep.'







As I slept within the confines of my room, my mind cast aside its mortal flesh and went into the dream realm only to take a different approach and tactic to enter, and instead of entering the usual facade of the realm of the night, it went into a realm of chaos and change, a purple realm of haze and confusion.

"Ah my child, welcome back, it has been so long since you have last shown up for your check-up, please do come inside and regale us with your stories."

A mysterious voice from my past spoke up, the flapping of wings can be heard in every direction in this forgotten realm.

"Maybe another time my friend, maybe another time, but for now I am need of your guidance."

I said to the voice, I could never completely give my trust to this being but I have little choice whenever I come here.

"And what would that be my apprentice?"

The mysterious voice said, its voice smooth as silk while at the same time rough and crackly like the rocks of the desert.

"How do I deal with these feelings, these emotions...this...love?"

I said, hoping the being would know how to deal with my plight but all I got back was a cackling shrill laugh before it spoke.

"Emotions are a weakness young pupil, you must forgo them in order to achieve true power, cast aside your affection to the young maiden, she will only hold you back."

The voice said as it started to fade as I realized that was all of the information I am ever going to get out of it for this night.

Waiting for the voice and its presence to completely fade away I heard another set of flapping wings but this time it is softer and quieter then the first one, and I immediately recognized it.

"Little Zephyr, shouldn't you be back with her instead of here?" 

I said to the little being beside me, its tiny wings are adorable on its small frame.

"But if I was with her then I wouldn't be here hearing your awesome stories!"

The small being said with a squeaky voice, it is truly adorable, in a strange way if you are not a black mage.

"Little Zephyr, you already know my stories, you were there after all."

Crossing my arms I looked down at the little being as it glided around me, trying to make me dizzy.

"Yeah but I was hidden remember?"

It said as it stopped behind me before appearing right in front of me.

"I know that, you have to be hidden for a reason."

"Is it really that important for no one to see me?"

The squeaky voice asked as I gave it a slow nod yes.

"Yes, it is paramount that you are not revealed yet, you are still incredibly weak to exist within the mortal world before succumbing to the pressure and magics that this world holds over us all."

I said as I gave it a pat on the head, being sure to avoid hurting it due to how fragile they are.

"Aww, your no fun at all, but I understand."

"You better, I am not going to be explaining it to her if you appear with me before your time and you expire."

"Fine have your secrets, you know I will know them sooner or later."

"But you already know them."

I said as it let out a weak-hearted laugh before slowly fading back into the purple haze of the realm.

"But its a secret!"

"You confuse me so much sometimes." was all I said to the strange little being before fading away, going back to the dream realm to avoid any suspicion that I might have created tonight.

I can only hope that the next few days and weeks will be easier on me.
> A New Stranger
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

	It has been a week since the slumber party with Rarity and Applejack, Barb has been acting a little clingy as of late and she has yet to tell me why she is acting like this but I can only chalk this up as a female dragon being clinging to their mate, which we are not a couple, she is just clingy is all. As the week went by I went back to teaching Twilight the basic fundamentals of thaumaturgy and small bits of the arcane healing arts and in return she teaches me a bit of unicorn magic which is frustratingly hard since I don't have a horn nor am I a pony which apparently is a must in order to use any type of pony magic but I am a Black Mage! This should be easy as picking ones nose or making Limsa Orange Juice.

Once the week came and went I went back to doing my usual routine of tending to my garden in the basement, teaching Twilight Sparkle, helping Barb with the chores around the library and lastly working as a part-time worker at the cafe in town. I also finally started to receive the respect that was due from the ponies here in town, after hearing about what I did to the dragon on the mountain summit, it was about damn time too because it is so very annoying having to deal with fools that say I am lying and tiring to constantly zap, freeze or burn ponies before healing them if they tell me to prove my magic to them.

It is also annoying when I need help grabbing the cookie jar from the top shelf in the library but that doesn't stop me from getting my prize of sugary cookie goodness, that and telling Twilight that I will not teach her how to tap into her inner reserves out of fear of her writing it down and spreading that tidbit of knowledge. There is just some things that I can't tell her like how I hate Princess Celestia for not punishing Luna for turning into Nightmare Moon or for not punishing herself for not preventing such a catastrophic event from happening in the first place. Reading the history of Equestria was my number one priority and as soon as I finished reading the history books and found out the cause of Luna's fall into despair and madness was from Celestia overshadowing the young princess with the sun and her followers, nobody wanted to praise the moon because it let the monsters of the wild come in and attack them while the sun forced them into hiding. Family should have come first with Celestia but seeing how she didn't even bother to comfort or even talk to her younger sister, she allowed the loneliness to fester and roil until it was too late, thus creating Nightmare Moon whom started a civil war which lead to many ponies dying, the Gryphon Kingdom invading and taking parts of Equestria and finally a large chunk of the northern province to vanish without a trace.

Although Celestia failed several times she did manage to keep what is left of Equestria together for a thousand years, stopped a second civil war, a war with the deer folk, several skirmishes with the gryphons and a duel to the death with the minotaur king in which she won but earned a pair of broken wings in the process. And now here she is, over a thousand years old, graceful, elegant, mastermind and chest master, beautiful in the eyes of her ponies and lastly she is the mentor to Twilight Sparkle.

"Okay, is there anything else before I go back into the kitchens that you would need from me?" I said as I looked up from the small notepad in my hands, my eyes resting on a lime green unicorn mare with her beige coated friend sipped on her glass of water through a straw.

"Yes, I would like the mixed salad with french toast and green tea."

"And you madam?"

"I would like the same thing but with earl grey tea."

"Alright I will be back with your lunch shortly." I said with a false smile on my face, this is something I would not be doing back home with my current rank within the Flames but since I am here and not with the Immortal Flames I must have an occupation for the time being that is able to pay me a decent wage so I can earn money to save what gil I have left.

Walking back to the kitchen I ripped the piece of paper off and away from my notepad and placed it on the counter before ringing the small bell on the side to alert the kitchen crew that they got another order. Once that was done I went back to what I was previously doing before I was interrupted by Lyra Heartstrings and her friend Bon-Bon, I was in the middle of reading a rather corny romance novel that Rarity had spoken highly of but to me this...this is both painful to read due to how bad it is and yet it is also informative on how these ponies view romantic ventures.

By the time I had finished four chapters I was expecting to hear the sound of a hoof ringing the ready bell for the party of two's late lunch but instead I heard nothing but the sounds of my own breathing and the gentle breeze passing by. Getting up and off the high chair I went to the kitchens to investigate as to why the two mares lunches are late and when I poked my head through the door I saw not a single pony in sight but my investigation was cut short when I was grabbed from behind by multiple pairs of hooves.

"What the-" was all I could weakly shout out before being pulled into the lobby of the cafe, all of the windows were closed, the door was locked and beside me was the entire kitchen staff, two other waiters, a waitress, the manager and lastly Lyra and Bon-Bon.

Glaring at the pony who is currently holding me I was immediately let go, staring angrily at the offending pony I was about to give them an earful when my mouth was stuffed with a hoof whom belongs to Lyra as she shushed me quietly.

The hoof that is currently in my mouth was once on the floor, which is dirty, and its in my mouth. A hoof that is used to walk around everywhere, with dirt, rocks, filthy mud, and she uses it to possibly pick her nose or rub herself which is more filth, and she probably uses it to help her go to the bathroom...

I was trying so hard to not rip her head off with my magic and to hold my lunch down from how such a gross thought came into my mind and how much that makes sense. As soon as Lyra removes her hoof from my mouth I give her a quick jab to the chest, her resulting whine of pain is all the revenge I would need as I scold her.

"Lyra Heartstrings and everypony present, never, ever, stick your hoof in my mouth, ever. I don't know where it has been, what you were doing with it, and quite possibly if you even bothered to clean it. That was in my mouth, that is freaking disgusting." I said with barely concealed venom in my tone, seriously, that is nasty as hell.

"Sorry, but you were about to blow our cover!"

"Blow your cover? Who are you hiding from?"

"Her!" Lyra quietly says as she points out the slightly ajar door in which everypony present was looking out of.

Moving to the doorway and once I got there I poked my head out the small opening and I immediately saw a pony-like figure wearing an unusually large brown cloak. I watched the strange pony look around; scratching a hoof against an open spot of dirt before looking around and for a moment I thought I saw the sparkle of gold within that cloak.

"Does any of you ponies know who that pony is?"

"I heard that pony lives in the Everfree forest!"

"I heard that pony practices dark magic!"

" I take offense to that... "

"I heard that pony is a zebra from across the ocean!"

"But do any of you have the truth of the matter?" I said as I waited for them to answer me, none did.

"Figures...well it was fun being here but I am going to talk to that 'zebra', if any of you want to join me then come along and if you don't stay here and hide, doesn't make a difference to me anyways." I said once again before stepping out the front door and before I could get pulled back inside I took a short jump away from the door which was just enough for the array of colored hooves that reached out to grab me would be off by a few inches.

Snorting at their failed attempt I made my way to the unknown pony in the middle of the street. As I made my way over to the pony in question I looked around to see if there was anyone else outside and to my surprise there was nobody else, just me and the 'zebra' although if they are doing this out of fear of the unknown then they are taking this I think a bit too far.

"Hello there stranger, what brings you to Ponyville on this fine day?" I said as I stopped a good four feet away from the 'zebra' and waited for a response, here is hoping that it understands my words.

"A stranger too for here you are. What brings oneself so far from your lands?"

"I should say the same for you but as for me, I was brought here against my will."

"For that you have my sympathies, but as for myself I simply came from distant sands."

"Ah, you’re from the deserts across the sea as am I but from different sands and different seas we are from. Maybe one day I might tell you the tale of how I came to be from there to here and here to hopefully back there I will return to."

"A story for another time, I hope to hear it one day."

"Yes, someday indeed but for now if I may ask as to what brings you here?"

It didn't take us long to get into a conversation, this mare, zebra female...I am just going to stick with mare for now to not confuse myself for the time being. Anyways this mare seems to speak in rhymes, I do not know why she does this but if it is the way she speaks then I will not question her culture, that is a surefire way to get oneself hurt or killed by insulting someone else's culture. As we talked we started to understand the other a little better, she goes by the name Zecora and that she lives by herself in the dark forest, her home is apparently protected by a circle of flowers that has a strange scent that scares away the beasts that live there and that is an alchemist herself or for a better term, she is a botanist who also brews potions, tonics and salves and trades or sells them to the ponies.

When I told a bit about myself to Zecora, I told her my occupation as a member of the Immortal Flames and a cafe waiter, practitioner of magic and lastly a good musician when it comes to the violin, a really small violin that fits to my size and not the large ones that everyone else uses.

It was during our talking that I realized that we were walking into the forest and stopped right in front of a large patch of blue flowers but it wasn’t from the flowers that we stopped, no we stopped because we both heard someone call out another’s name and it was from behind us.

Turning around we both saw a small yellow pony with a red mane and an ungodly large red bow with orange eyes standing not too far behind the both of us and standing even further away from behind the three of us are my six friends, Barb not among them for some reason, and Applejack was looking not so pleased with the little pony between us.

“You get back here right now.” Applejack said with something akin to a scolding glare and I am so glad that it is not being directed at me.

At this moment I was thinking on how exactly did this filly managed to not only sneak behind the two of us but also manage to be quiet for the longest time. I have to give this filly some merit for following us into this dreary place without any kind of protective armor or weapon to protect herself, that takes some guts and also a foolish mind to do.

“Beware, beware you ponyfolk. Those leaves of blue are not a joke.” Zecora says while backing away from me, the large field of blue flowers and lastly the six mares.

I could only stand there thinking why I am always stuck in the middle of these types of situations on an almost weekly basis.

“You keep your mumbo jumbo to yourself you hear!” Applejack shouted at a rapidly fading Zecora as the rest of her friends joined in with their own shouting. Seems like the peanut gallery is getting its admittance fee just in time.

“Oh brother…” Twilight mumbled as I facepalm at those idiots, I mean seriously, nothing bad was going to happen to me and now for this little filly might get yelled at by either me or Zecora but we would then let her tag along until we come back to Ponyville to get scowled by her parents.

“Beware! Bewareeeeeeeeee!” Zecora said one last time before fading from view and with it my one chance to talk to a fellow stranger.

“Yeah! Right back at ya Zecora. You and your lame curses are the ones that better beware!” Rainbow Dash said and both myself and the little filly glared at the rainbow maned pegasus, I mean really…saying that curses are lame? How have you not heard of the dreaded blindness curse or sickness hexes, plagues created from magic are nearly impossible to stop unless you can kill or stop the madman that created it.

“And you, why couldn’t you listen to your big sister.” Applejack sternly said to Appleboom, the aptly named yellow earth pony now on her big sister’s back, and the little filly lowered her head in shame or sadness.

“I…I…” Applebloom tried to speak but sadly she couldn’t even utter out a single word.

‘Cause the big sister is sometimes dumber than a sack of hammers.’ I quietly thought to myself, it is true that Applejack can be hardheaded sometimes but this time it seems she is taking the cake.

“Who knows what kind of nasty curse Zecora could of put on you.” And there it is again, curses and hexes aren’t that easy to put on someone or a large mass of people without careful preparations, a ton of ingredients and lastly skilled if not competent spell weavers and yes this blockhead says that it was going to be easy just by following her.

I just can’t wait for these ponies to get some sort of affliction for being mean to Zecora without even getting the full story.

As Pinkie breaks into a song about evil enchantresses I made my way over to them while staying out of the flower patch of blue flowers just as Rainbow Dash flies in low right through them. I swear those flowers better be poisonous or I am going to blow my top.

“You guys there is no such thing as curses!” and there is a nonbeliever of curses, tonight I will put a curse on you just to make you a believer…maybe something to make you be unable to cast magic.

“Well that is interesting thing to hear coming from magic pants herself.” Rainbow Dash said as I added another target to my cursing list.

“My magic, real magic comes from within. It’s a skill you’re born with; curses are artificial, fake magic. It’s conjured with potions and incantations, it’s all smoke and mirrors meant to scare but curses have no real power. There just an old pony tale.” Twilight says as I started to fume internally.

‘If curses and hexes aren’t real then how the bloody hell do I have one on my freaking left eye!’

“Just you wait, your gonna find out that some old pony tales really are true.” Applejack said as she walked off with the rest of the girls, leaving Twilight with me as I slowly shook my head, trying to ease the rising anger.

We went back together and before we went back to the library I had to make a quick stop at my job to pick up my staff and also my corny romance book. When I entered the establishment I saw that it was exactly where I left it along with a note saying to not be touched unless it is me, and if it is me then I am getting my pay docked for skipping out to talk to Zecora.

‘I hate these ponies…’

Walking back to the library I made my way the basement, watered my plants, pruned any dying ends and went back upstairs to my room to see a sleeping gryphon lying on her back, and by lying on her back I mean she is on her back, wings fully extended to the side to keep her on her back, her tail lazily waving back and forth and lastly her hind legs are wide open for inspection…and I just lost my ability to sleep for the coming days.


 The Next Day 


Waking up the next day was easy for me, I went to bed late due to Gilda revealing herself to both myself and Barb and when I told her that she pretty much threatened to gut me if I ever told anyone that I saw her like that but I reassured her that wasn’t going to happen because I was busy trying to purge that sight from my mind at that very moment. And as for why I went to bed late, I was busy placing a curse on Twilight and Rainbow Dash for not believing in them, Twilight temporarily lost her magic and Rainbow Dash got a bit of the confusions.

As I was waking up I felt groggy and tired due to sleeping on a table while sitting on a stool so my butt is numb and my face as an imprint of a quill on my forehead. After that I heard a very loud, very girly and oh so deliciously evil to my ears scream coming from Twilight’s room.

When I ran up the stairs to see what was wrong I saw the main area of the library littered with books, there was piles everywhere and in the middle of them all was Twilight, saying ‘no’ multiple times while looking through another book before throwing it aside.

“There has to be a real reason for this an illness, an allergy!”

“A curse!” Barb said after looking up from her book and looked at Twilight whom immediately dismissed her obvious answer.

“I said a real reason, something that points to something real.”

“How about this one.” Barb said as she closed her book and presented it to Twilight to read.

“Super natural…Barb, super natural refers to ghosts, spirits or zombies which are as make-believe as curses. This book is just a bunch of hooey!” Twilight said as I started to fume internally again.

‘Girl say that to my face, I fought ghosts, spirits and zombies and none of them are fake.’

“But what if your wrong Twilight? But what if there really is-“ Barb was about to finish before getting interrupted by Pinkie Pie whom appeared out of nowhere but with her tongue being larger than normal and being covered in blue dots.

*unintelligible sputtering*

“A purse? How could it be a purse?” Barb said mostly to herself as I tried not to laugh that it was actually a curse of some kind placed on her.

*more unintelligible sputtering*

“Pinkie what happened to you?” Twilight said as Pinkie started to talk in nothing more than sputters.

*even more unintelligible sputtering*

“Hey! Say it don’t spray it Pinkie!” Barb said as she gets covered in Pinkie spit, which is really gross and lucky of me to be away from the spit sprayer.

“Ow!” All four of us heard as something slammed into the tree library and we found the source it was Rainbow Dash trying to get in but was bumping into the window.

“She-“*slam* “-is trying to say that-“*slam* “-Zecora…she slapped us all with a curse!” *crash* Rainbow Dash finally manages to say before crashing into the bookshelf.

“I’m afraid I have to agree.” Rarity said just as she enters the library, her mane and fur is a completely tangled mess. Both Barb and Twilight gasped in shock at Rarity’s appearance, it looks like she hasn’t even bothered to take care of herself in months!

“I hate to say I told you so Twilight but I told you so!” all six of us heard as we turned to face Applebloom holding up a shrunken Applejack.

“It’s a curse I tells ya!”

“But…Fluttershy seems just fine!”

“Yes, there doesn’t seem to be a thing wrong with her.”

“Fluttershy, are you okay?” Twilight said as Fluttershy looks away slightly, there doesn’t seem to be anything wrong with her physically, “Is there something wrong with you?” Twilight says as Fluttershy nods her head, “Would you care to tell us?” Twilight says, looking a bit nonplussed as we all try to figure out what is wrong with our yellow quiet friend.  “So you’re not going to tell us?” we get another nod, “Is that yes for your not or yes you will.”

“Good gravy girl what’s wrong with you?” Applejack finally shouted as she galloped across the table right up to Fluttershy.

“I don’t wanna talk about it.” Fluttershy said in the deepest, most masculine voice I could ever imagine.

Both Barb and I finally lost it and we started to laugh our ass off to the point that laughing was painful.

“Ahahahaha this is hilarious! Look at all of you, we got Hairity, Rainbow Crash, Spitty Pie, Appletenie, Flutterguy and…eh I got nothing.” Barb said as I laughed even harder to the point my lungs was hurting badly and was coughing harshly until Barb slapped me on the back to stop me.

“Twilight Sparkle, seriously I can’t even work with that.” Barb said as Twilight looked like she was insulted for not even getting an insulting name.

“Heheheee…this is no joke Barb now start looking for more books so I can start finding a cure!” Twilight said to Barb as the young dragoness storms off all the while mumbling to herself, and as for me I was trying to control my giggles because it is so funny to see these six mares like this. It is so funny that I will in fact take a magical picture of them all and then melt it into a piece of parchment to have it immortalized forever, and to show it to Gilda when she wakes up or comes down here.

“I’ll bet we will find the cure at Zecora’s place!” Rainbow Dash said before Twilight rushes right up to her say that it is not a curse.

It took me a while to realize that it wasn’t any of my curses for a variety of reasons as the first one is that if it was my curses then there would be a glowing symbol on the spot that is cursed. Second there is no way that it is from me because I am lacking in the proper catalysts and reacting agents to make the curses and if I used the wrong ones then it would either fail or explode in my face.

As the mares started to argue with one another I began to help Barb look for a book to cure their strange curses even though I think that Zecora might have actually cursed them for being rude or insulting her in some fashion, which they probably might have deserved it. It was during this search for a cure that I came across the same book that Barb offered to Twilight but she dismissed it for being super natural and when I looked through it and saw that these girls are suffering from something akin to what is being described I was about to speak up when I realized that Applebloom was slowly sneaking off again, probably to go back home or to the Everfree Forest to speak to Zecora.

“Hey Barb, hold the fort down while I go after Applebloom, and while you’re at it try to think of something for Twilight’s current floppy horn condition, make it a good one!” I said while snickering before going off after the yellow filly.

You know for a small pony she sure as hell can run fast, I had a hard time catching up to her and an even harder time not tripping and falling over myself. It was when we got to the outskirts of the town that we had to stop because apparently Applebloom had a passenger hidden on her and when they stopped I had to jump into a bush and wait patiently as I watched the young filly place a mini Applejack on a plant before happily trotting off.

As soon as Applebloom vanished from sight I went over to Applejack before snickering quietly to myself and reassured the worried mare that I will make sure that nothing bad happens to her.

Now let me tell you something strange and spooky homes, Zecora lives in what looks like a tree that could somewhat be smaller in shape and size compared to Twilight’s, and outside of her tree are two masks made of wood, some hanging bottles filled with strange things and as for the inside of her place, more masks, more potions, a cauldron, hammocks for beds, some pots and pans, and lastly a normal straw broom. I would at first think is something akin to old Lalafell homes back before we united and formed the syndicate and the Sultan position alongside the creation of Ul’Dah but this place feels rather homely for a Zebra home.

During our time in this home Zecora, Applebloom and myself were making some sort of brew that I currently do not know what it is but from what Zecora is telling me that it is meant to cure an ill group of ponies who fell victim to a plant, and at first I couldn’t figure out what she means by that but when I turned my head and looked out the window to see the girls staring inside I immediately knew that this is not going to end well for either myself, Zecora or the girls that are peeking in.

I let out a sigh of disbelief as I look back at the brew and kept on stirring it, Applebloom left to go get some ingredient from the backroom while Zecora and I stirred, mixed and tested the brew to see if the cure is ready but so far it isn’t even close to being a cure, more like a nasty green pea stew.

Wiping my brow of some sweat I tell Zecora that I am going outside to take a breather and as soon as I opened the front door I had to duck as a dive bombing Rainbow Dash with a mini Applejack riding her like a chocobo comes barreling on in and started to knock everything over. I tried to grab and bring down the flying battering ram but sadly she is too fast for me to catch so she keeps on ramming into everything, breaking bottles, knocking over masks and other things and lastly Zecora is speaking in her native language, probably cursing at her.

Looking at Rainbow Dash crashing into everything, Applejack wrestling with Zecora’s left ear, the other four mares blocking the door and Applebloom still nowhere to be seen, all I could really do is pinch the bridge of my nose, count to five before shouting loud enough for all of them to hear me.

“BE QUIET!” I shouted loud enough for all to hear but sadly it was too late, Rainbow Dash’s uncontrollable flight plan takes a path right into Zecora’s cauldron, knocking it over and spilling the nasty green brew all over the floor.

“No! You know not what you do.  You have gone and spilled my precious brew!” Zecora said as she slightly kneeled down on the floor, staring sadly at it as I pinched the bridge of my nose again but this time I pinched it hard enough to hurt myself.

“We are onto you Zecora, I didn’t want to believe that you cursed us but the evidence is overwhelming.” Twilight said just as the rest of her friends started to air out their grievances which also result in my fuming internally which sadly doesn’t end well for these ladies.

“Hey Zecora, I got the things you asked for…” Applebloom said just as she walked in and saw the destruction, Twilight and Zecora butting heads, the other girls standing their staring at her in shock and me about to explode.

“Applebloom you’re okay!” Applejack said as I facepalmed, seriously, who eats ponies besides wild animals, especially another pony cause that is just barbaric.

“Of course I am, why wouldn’t I be?” Applebloom says as I let out a sigh of anger mixed with tiredness, I swear these ponies drive me to drink.

‘Looks like I am heading back to the bar again this week with Gilda.’

“Because Zecora is an evil enchantress who was going to turn you into soup!” I am going to pretend I didn’t hear that.

I felt my mind break at that stupid response, I mean here is the student to the ruler of a vast kingdom, trained to be an expert magic user, had access to limitless amounts of knowledge that was at her disposal, and she says that? I think I am going to have an aneurism of sheer stupidity.

“No you idiot! Why would you even think that in the first place! If she was going to be a cannibal then she would have made sure no one followed her let alone discover who her victim is! Seriously girls, I expected better from all of you, especially you Twilight Sparkle. I am deeply ashamed in you all, thinking that Zecora was going to turn Applebloom into stew, come on!”

“But Tatalito, how can you explain all of this? This is surely a curse and she put it on us all!” Twilight said as she tried to convince me that she is right yet again but this time she is wrong.

“Twilight, my poor, simple minded fool of a friend, if you bothered to remember what Zecora said, which she clearly says that those plants of blue are not a joke, which is true because they are called Poison Joke. Apparently they cause something akin to a terrible prank on you that changes a part about you that you rely on the most, and sadly you all were moving through it like crazy so that is why it looks like you got cursed.” I said while walking behind them to the closet to get something to help me clean up this mess.

“But you were in it too! Why aren’t you affected by it?” Twilight said as she pointed an accusing hoof at me.

“Because Twilight I am wearing clothes, you weren’t. It touched my clothes which left my flesh unaffected you girls got covered in the stuff and was altered by it in the morning. Next time look where you are going.” I said as I started to clean up the spill with a rag and a bucket.

“But how do you explain the cauldron-“ “-and the chanting-“ “and the creepy décor.” 

“Girls, those are her belongings from her homeland, surely you saw some of the things that I brought with me when I was forcibly moved here, hell you even saw the flag of my home city.”

“How come she has a book that has a cure for this, I mean I looked in every book in the library but it had nothing on this.”

“Here is the book you see, sad that you lack it in your library.” And when Zecora revealed the cover I felt my brain crack yet again as it is the same book that me and Barb were looking at before we went on our separate ways. We were all staring at the book on Super Naturals, and I had the insane urge to rub it in her face for calling it a bunch of bull.

“I do have the book but I didn’t look inside of it because of its title.” Twilight says as Zecora flips open the book to show her the inner part of the title. “Super Naturals, natural remedies and cure-alls that are simply super.” You’re an idiot Twilight Sparkle.

“I-I-I am so sorry Zecora.” Twilight said as I cough next to her, “and you to Tatalito.” I smiled brightly as I walk by her to dump out the ruined brew.

The walk back to Ponyville was uneventful but as we get into Ponyville Proper everyone started to run around as if they got their heads cut off, screaming ‘The horror, the horror!’ and for everyone to get inside, I swear to Nald’Thal this is getting old real fast.

When we got to the spa and re-made the brew I watched the girls pile on it and cursed themselves while I fiddled with my clothes, trying to get a stray poison joke leaf off and once it did get off I threw it away, not letting it touch my skin as to avoid the same fate those ladies suffered.

 Night Time 

‘Dear Journal, today has been a hectic day, Twilight Sparkle and her friends thought a zebra named Zecora is an evil enchantress and had placed a curse of sorts on her and her friends. Contrary to their beliefs it was actually a plant called Poison Joke (Look at Equestrian Botany Page 201 for more information) that has gave them a negative surprise that manipulates their prime trait and takes it for a turn for the worse. When the girls confronted Zecora I was in her company helping her make a cure along with Applebloom who followed me to her place and when confronted they accidentally spilled the brew and angered my black and white stripped friend. I swear these ponies are afraid of anything that isn’t them, not sure if they are simply racist or are just intolerant of outsiders due to their timid nature.’

‘Twilight wrote a letter before going to bed and after she gave it to Barb I took it from her and placed the magically created picture of Twilight and Friends during their blighted affliction, I bet the sun princess is going to find it very humorous.’

It was the morning after did I get some sort of payback from Twilight and her friends. When I woke up I did the usual morning routine of groggily waking up in the between both a sleeping Gilda and Barb, wiggle my way out from their hold and go to the bathroom to clean myself up and to get dressed but when I looked in the mirror to see if anything has changed I let out a sigh of relief to find out that nothing changed but when I said good moning to Twilight I found that my voice was several pitches higher then normal. My voice was very squeaky, very tiny and very annoying. I don't know how Twilight managed to do that but I had to stay like that the entire day because apparently the spa sisters and Zecora ran out of the ingrediants that are needed to make the cure so I had to go around Ponyville like this until tommorrow.

'I hate these ponies so much...'
> Interlude Part 1
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

	It was a warm day, fall has just arrived and with it comes the demand for more tea, a blanket in the living room and a good book to read when I am not being forced into some sort of strange activity with Pinkie Pie, Rarity's fashion designs, Twilight's questions and teachings, Applejack's farm work, Rainbow Dash's weather managing and Fluttershy's animal handling and/or healing.

During my time off from helping them I spend it either in the library basement with my plants, out in the park relaxing or when I know that I am alone, trying to find a way back home. I know that Princess Celestia and her recently returned sister Luna, whom I still hold a grudge against for summoning me here against my will, are trying to find me a way back but my hope for that is turning slimmer by the day. My desire to return home is great but even with the assistance of two 'goddesses' I doubt they know how to throw me back into my world let alone do it accurately and have me placed near Ul'Dah or any of the other city-states.

It was during one of these days offs did my usual schedule get postponed due to a royal pony arriving by chariot that was being pulled by two royal guards. At times Princess Celestia would visit when she has time to be away from her throne and her sister and she would visit Twilight and Barb, I am usually in the basement studying my plants or experimenting with various chemicals and liquids or asleep upstairs from being exhausted but on this day I was doing neither of the three and I was able to talk with the white monarch.

I was sitting in the living room reading a book on the ponies anatomy, apparently, my healing spells only works on cuts, scrapes, sudden baldness from my fire spells, rug burns, hiccups, sprains, bruises and also for some reason brain freeze. That spell also works on curing minor diseases like the sniffles, a cold, stomach cramps, hangovers and lastly and most importantly diarrhea. The reason as to why I am reading this book is that I need to expand on my healing magic in order to help those that need it, broken bones, lacerations, internal bleeding, damaged or ruptured internal organs, damaged muscles, and quite possibly brain damage but then again that is a relatively new field of study back home.

When word arrived that Princess Celestia will be coming here today so I did what I think would be required of a royal visit, I put on my Immortal Flames uniform, combed my recently cut hair, cleaned my shoes and hat and lastly had my eye-patch cleaned. It has been a while since I even bothered to take off my eye-patch and for good reason, looking into the mirror all I saw my face with a patch of flesh covering where my left eye used to be.

Moving my left hand to touch the patchwork of skin, I let out a sigh of mixed emotions, those outside of the Immortal Flames sees the eye-patch and think that I lost my eye in a battle against the beast-kin, those within the Flames think that it was lost during my training as a Black Mage, but those that are part of the cabal know the true price we all paid for the dark knowledge and terrible secrets that come with the void-stained robes.

Rubbing the patch of flesh that is underneath the eye-patch I feel around, at first it is seamless to the touch and in the mirror it even looks like a flawless smooth recovery to cover the missing eye but upon closer examination, it wasn't seamless. Feeling around a little deeper at the edges I felt the smallest bumps of thread and without even needing to tug on it I felt it start to undo itself but I quickly moved my hand away from it, not wanting to undo that yet.

'So many secrets, buried in the darkness.'

"Tatalito! Are you done in there yet! The princess is downstairs waiting for you!" I hear Twilight yell through the door, seems like it is now or never and I am positive that it would be later rather than now or never.

"Yes! I am done, I am coming down now!" I shouted as I opened the door and started to make my way downstairs.

As I made my way down I saw Barb pouring a cup of tea to Princess Celestia and Twilight, Gilda is asleep on the sofa, I guess she either grew bored of the two mares talking or is tired from her...whatever it is that she does at this time.

"Ah Mr. Yayalito, it has been a while since we last talked hasn't it." Celestia said as she takes a testing sip of the tea, testing how hot it is to know how long she must wait for it to cool off but she seems satisfied with its temperature and takes another sip.

"Yes it has been a while, I do believe since we first met was the last time we have talked face to face instead of via letters through Barb. I do hope your journey here wasn't interrupted by anything foul on the roads or in the air." I said as I sat down beside the sleeping griffon whose response is to let out a loud snort before rolling over, facing away from the rest of us and with her tail in my lap.

'Gilda, you have made it way too easy for me to torture you. Your tail now belongs to me.'

"We should do something about that, I heard from my student that you have plenty of stories to tell from your homeland if it wouldn't be a bother I would like to hear a few if you are willing to tell them."

"Well, I guess I could regale you your majesty with a story from home, what would you like to hear?"

"Hmm, how about how you lost your eye? You look far too young to have lost in an accident or in battle." Celestia says she sits down on a cushion provided by Twilight, the purple mare sits down beside her, almost laying against her like a child would with their parents.

"I could tell you that story but...those that are like me would be most displeased that I released anything about us to those that are not part of the congregation. But I could tell you how I began my training in the magical arts." I said, petting Gilda's tail for the time being as Barb sits beside me, munching on a sapphire the size of an apple, I don't know where she keeps getting those gems but I want some, I want to know if the gems here are edible to everyone although I have only seen them eaten by the young dragoness.

"Alright then, I guess another time for that story, but do go on." and once she quieted down I began my story on how I became a thaumaturgist and later a black mage.

"My training began when I turned seven years old and started to show signs that I had mana flowing in my veins. As soon as it was discovered I was sent to Ul'Dah that was only a half day journey on foot from Horizon and was placed into the training halls of the thaumaturgist academy with the five masters. When they showed me to the masters they had wanted me to try and cast a spell and since I didn't know any they were just testing me and of course I failed but when they sensed just how much mana that I had flowing in my veins they had decided to accept me into the academy."

"My first few weeks in the academy were tough, I didn't have my family there with me for comfort, I didn't know any of the students nor the teachers, and at the time I was afraid of the dark. My studies were going poorly for the first three months, I couldn't concentrate as I was always thinking of home and my family but as time went on I thought less of home and more on what was placed before me. On the sixth month of my training I learned how to cast the beginning spells of a thaumaturgist in which was one of the happiest days of my life, the downside of it was that I burned all of the hair off my head and I was bald for a few months for it to all grow back."

"After the little incident with the fire spell I started to pay attention to the lessons, I took notes down, studied after hours to get it down, I was focused on passing these classes to make my family proud. I spent at least four years in that academy until I graduated at the top of my class, I was one of the best students other then the other Lalafells, Hyur's, Miqo'te's, Elezen's and Roegadyn's, that were in the same class as myself. When I turned twelve I returned home and greeted by my family and friends, they asked me what I was doing at the academy, did I make any friends, did anything interesting happened, did I meet someone of importance."

"I did make some friends with the other students but most kept to themselves, a few things happened but none of it was that interesting and someone of importance did come to the academy, the young sultaness came to the academy to look at the new graduates. And it was on that day that I met the sultaness and she became infatuated with me, a crush on a recently graduated student of thaumaturgy. I don't know what she sees in me but apparently, it was enough for her to flirt with me at every opportunity we meet, to try to kiss me when we were fifteen, even made the one demand to bed her when she was drunk when we were both at the age of twenty. I swear that girl must either see me as the forbidden fruit seeing that she is a high-born and I am a peasant or that she saw the greatness that I would eventually become."

"Even though my training in thaumaturgy has ended when I got a letter when I was fifteen I was...chosen to further my studies and that is a story for another time." I said with a grin as I heard Celestia, Twilight, Barb and strangely enough Gilda let out moans, seems like they wanted me to keep going with my story.

"Could you please tell us what these advanced studies are?" Celestia says as Twilight nods and agrees with her.

"I am afraid I can't, you ponies have your secrets that you would never share with others and I have my secrets that I wouldn't share with others. If you would like me to tell you what those studies are you would have to follow in my steps which I know you won't because your light is far too bright...yours too Twilight." I said as I stared at the two before going back to Barb, leaning a bit against her, feeding off her warmth as the cold weather starts to pick up and seep through the window

"I don't get it, what do you mean by our light is too bright? Do you have to learn this all in the dark?"

"You could say that Twilight...you could say that," I said as I mumbled the last bit, she is too innocent to know about the rituals and sacrifices that are needed to achieve greatness.

Once my story was done then we started to talk about some things that held no real importance to me, some local news, some gossip, a bit of news coming back and forth from Canterlot, a letter for Gilda that came from her home, nothing new on my request for finding any information to find a way home and lastly Princess Luna has asked through her sister if I can come over to Canterlot for a visit of sorts. I declined for numerous reasons, the main one is that I am probably going to kill her for bringing me here.

Taking a break from the outside world I started to read my journal that I had kept during my time with the Immortal Flames and the local militia in Horizon, I made sure that no one else tried to look over my shoulder by angling myself away from everyone.

It was during my private reading did I get interrupted by no one else but Celestia. Closing my book I look up at her and raised an eyebrow, wondering why she is trying to get my attention.

"What book are you reading there?" Princess Celestia said as she scooted close to me, I guess she is trying to be friendly while learning more about me.

She is going to earn that not just get it for free.

"Just my private journal," I said while looking at her, my finger kept at the page I was currently at.

"That journal reminds me of Twilight's private diary, and seeing how she is always writing in it and hides it in the same spot here like the one in Canterlot..."

"P-princess! You found my diary!"

"Well it wasn't that hard Twilight, you hid it under your pillow and you of all ponies should know that the maids always replace the sheets for your bed whenever you leave the room in the morning."

I looked at Twilight and shook my head, I hide my journal in one of the many potted plants that are in the basement.

"You need to find a better hiding spot Twilight, if it is under the pillow then you really need to get more creative, ask Pinkie Pie for advice cause she seems to be an expert in hiding in strange places," I said as I thought back to that one time she was hiding in a mailbox...how she managed to fit inside that thing without being crushed to death.

After that we went back to talking about local happenings, Barb's crush on me, the both of us refusing to look at each other while Gilda snores a bit and rolls over, Rarity's newest fashion line, Applejack's business gaining some new patrons, Pinkie Pie still being crazy and Rainbow Dash gaining a new sleeping spot, on the back of my chocobo when he isn't wearing his saddle and harness.

It would seem that today is going to be just a regular day with nothing bad happening or out of the ordinary. I just wish that future days can be just like this one, sadly that will never be the case.