Not Your Everyday Picnic
"I can't wait to get to the picnic that Rainbow Dash put together just for US! She's the coolest pony ever! But she isn't as cold as ice cream, that's freeeeezing cold. If she were freezing cold, that would mean that every time I hugged her, I would get frozen! But it's a good thing she isn't hot, because..." Pinkie Pie gushed, as she bounced along the road leading out of town. A strange sound accompanied every bounce, and seemed to come from nowhere in particular.
The picnic Pinkie was talking about was just outside of Ponyville, on the top of a hill that overlooked the small town. Twilight, Applejack, Fluttershy, Rarity, Cloud Kicker, and of course Ponyville's Party Pony were all supposed to be meeting Rainbow Dash at the previously mentioned hill. Knowing Rainbow Dash, she had probably gotten all about the picnic that she had started planning last week, and would either be late, or show up just before her friends, as if she had planned it that way all along.
Pinkie Pie was bouncing along in the lead, rambling to anypony that was listening; at the time, that was nopony.
"So," Cloud Kicker wondered aloud, "what does Rainbow Dash have planned for this 'Amazingly, Awesomely, Radically, Cool Picnic'?"
"OOH! I bet she'll have lots of flavory food, tons of great games, and plenty of delightful drinks for us!" Pinkie had turned around to say this, and was now bouncing backwards. "And she'll have-"
"I am soo glad I wore this hat today. It's rather warm out here," Rarity tactfully interrupted Pinke's oncoming tirade. Sparing everypony from having to listen to an endless list of things one could do, drink, and eat, at a picnic.
"I've never seen you wearing that hat before. Is it new?" Twilight asked in an attempt to keep the current conversation going. Thankfully, Pinkie Pie had turned back around, and was now singing some random song about Celestia knows what.
"Why, yes it is. Thank you for noticing Twilight," Rarity responded, dipping her head so that Twilight could get a proper look at her hat. The hat in question was broad-brimmed, light blue, and had a ribbon ending in a bow on the crown it.
"I hope there will be some cute cuddly critters for me to talk to," Fluttershy told Applejack.
"If there are any, you can give 'em some of my fresh picked apples from the farm," Applejack informed her shy friend.
"Oh thank you Applejack, I would love to feed some of your delicious family apples to any creatures we might find. Speaking of which, I wouldn't mind eating a couple apples myself."
"It's a good thing were almost there," Twilight said to her friends. "I just hope that Rainbow Dash is there waiting... with food."
"Now that you mention it, I am a bit puckish," Rarity added. "I've worked up an apatite from all this walking."
"I'm usually hungry myself, after a good bang," Cloud Kicker said crassly.
With that, an awkward silence fell over the group. Except for Pinkie Pie. She was still singing raucously, and bouncing along, as if Cloud hadn't just made the social blunder of the century. That's what Rarity was thinking. The other ponies had different thoughts. And not all of them kept them as thoughts.
"You know," Said Twilight thoughtfully. "I've never banged anypony before, or had sex. But, from my studies, banging and sex are the same thing."
"Well, Twilight Sparkle," Cloud kicker said in a sultry voice, putting a wing over her. "I can always show you the ropes, anytime you want."
Rarity gasped at hearing this, and started spluttering, trying to berate Cloud Kicker for her social faux pas.
Fluttershy's mane had covered her face the moment the conversation got awkward, hiding her bright red cheeks.
Applejack's bottom jaw had dropped at this last statement, and was now dragging along the ground behind her.
Twilight, the pony this should have outraged the most, just had a thoughtful expression on her face, as if she were actually contemplating Cloud Kicker's offer.
"Hmm... I think I might-" Twilight started to respond, but Cloudy interrupted her:
"Whoa whoa whoa! I was only joking! Its a rule of mine not to bang friends." Cloud also removed the wing she had around Twilight.
Cloud noticed that Twilight seemed let down after hearing this. "Oh..." Twilight said awkwardly, with a bit of disappointment in her voice. "I thought you were actually offering..."
"I might be willing to make an exception though," Cloud whispered in Twilight's ear.
Twilight perked back up after hearing this.
"What did she say?!" Rarity demanded, seeing that Cloud Kicker had whispered something to Twilight. "Tell me! TELL ME! I need to know!"
Pinkie Pie interrupted any further talk of sex, or banging as Cloud liked to call it, by shouting loudly, "WE'RE HERE!!"
"It's about time you girls showed up. I've been waiting for an hour," Rainbow Dash said impatiently. She was lying on a very large blanket that was spread out on the grass. In the center of the blanket were two large picnic baskets. One was full of tasty food that Rainbow had, presumably, prepared herself. The other basket held plenty of cool drinks for everypony.
"Wow Rainbow Dash! This looks amazing!" exclaimed Twilight.
"Well, it was put together by yours truly. The most awesomely amazing pony in existence!" Rainbow Dash always let every compliment go directly to her head.
Rainbow Dash got up, and walked over to he friends. "Hope your all hungry," Rainbow stated, " because there's tons of radical food for everypony."
"It does look pretty cool," Cloud Kicker conceded, "but it would be way cooler if-"
"This really is a lovely picnic you made for us, dear," Rarity interrupted Cloud before she could say something inappropriate. "But I'm sure that the food tastes much better than it looks. And there is only one way to find out."
"I was going to say, that this picnic would be way cooler if I put it together," this was accompanied with a pointed look at Rarity, from Cloud kicker.
"Pfft. There's no waaaay your picnic could be better than mine," Rainbow Dash boasted.
"Ah brought some of my apples ta go along with your food, Rainbow," Applejack tactfully ending the boasting match before it could get into full swing.
"You told us that you brought the apples because you thought Dashy would forget to bring food, silly!" Pinkie Pie reminded AJ of this fact.
"Oh really." Rainbow Dash said this as she turned from Pinkie to glare at Applejack.
Twilight sighed in exasperation. "Can we just sit down and eat already?" she complained.
And with that, the seven friends sat down to an awesome picnic, put together by Ponyville's awesomest Pegasus.
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For the most part, everypony was finished eating. Except for Cloud Kicker and Rainbow Dash, since they seemed to be in some sort of eating contest.
"Twi," asked Applejack, "didn't you say you had some fancy new trick you were gonna show us?"
"Thanks for reminding me AJ. I almost forgot all about it."
"You've been awfully quite, Fluttershy. Is something the matter?" Rarity inquired of the yellow Pegasus.
"Oh, I'm so sorry for not talking. I've just been watching the little flowers, and the butterflies and bumble-bees that visit them," apologized Fluttershy.
"Alright girls." Twilight said this in a way that got everpony's attention. "Are you reay to see some magic?"
"Am I ever!" shouted Pinkie; the rest of the group of friends just nodded.
"Here goes." And with that, Twilight's horn started to glow. Tendrils of magic started to coalesce in the air, and swirl around. Slowly at first, but they began to pick up speed as the glow from Twilight's horn grew brighter. The tendrils were now whirling around so fast, they were whipping everypony's manes and tails around. They started to join together, forming a cyclone of magic around the ponies. All the while, Twilight's horn was glowing ever brighter.
The wind had gotten to the point where they couldn't hear each other, even when shouting at the tops of their lungs.
Cloud made her way over to Twilight, in the hope that she could get the unicorn to stop the spell. When Cloud Kicker finally got to Twilight, she realized that it was hopeless: The unicorn's horn was glowing to brightly to even look at, and her eyes were completely white with the power of the magic that was swirling around them.
All of the sudden, Twilight Sparkle Started to lift into the air. Terrified by what was going on, Cloud Kicker grabbed the unicorn before her, trying to pull her back to the ground. When Cloud kicker was unable to pull Twilight back down, she looked at her own hooves, and noticing that they were no longer on the ground either.
The ponies within the swirling vortex of purple energy were being lifted into the air. They quickly accelerated into the sunny afternoon sky.
Looking up, the ponies realized that they were hurtling towards the ground at very lethal speeds.