> Best Chance for a Romance
>  by Crosis
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

> 1. Fueled by Desperation
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

One quick note: As mentioned in the desc, this is a sequel.  While not essential, I strongly recommend you check out Heart to Heart first.


The greatest happiness of life is the 
conviction that we are loved,
loved for ourselves, 
or rather loved in spite of ourselves.

-Victor Hugo




Fueled by Desperation-

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One of the benefits to living with somepony for a great length of time is that you become an expert in nonverbal communication.  Subtle changes in expression, posture, even deviations from normal habits or behavior can provide insight into your companion’s mood.

So when Twilight Sparkle heard the library’s door open and slam a full thirty minutes ahead of time, she didn’t need to see the slump of his shoulders or his downtrodden expression to know that something was wrong.

Setting her book to the side, she stood and made her way downstairs.  The scene that awaited nearly broke her heart.

Spike stood alone in the foyer.  His head was bowed, but she could see the tracks on his cheeks where tears had run.  In his left claw was the jeweled bowtie Rarity had made for him.  It was covered with dust, apparently from being dragged over the street.  In his right, petals dropping to the floor like a symbol of unrequited love, was a bouquet of roses.

She wanted to rush over to him and sweep him up in a hug, overpower all the negativity with her own warmth and affection.  Demand to know what was wrong and what she could do to fix it.  Anything but see him look so dejected.

But she knew Spike better than that.  Coming on too strong would only stir up the emotions he had just recently pushed down.  Better if she provided comfort with her presence.  An ear to listen, a shoulder to cry on.

Smiling as gently as she could, she asked, “Hey big guy.  Doing alright?”

He looked up; his eyes were red and puffy, but the familiar question brought out the hint of a smile.

“I got a good old friend here with me tonight,” he responded with a sniffle.  “And I guess I’m doing alright.”

She didn’t say anything more.  Instead, she nudged Spike over to the couch, taking the items from his claws so he could clamber up.  Placing them to the side, she settled herself down and pulled him close beside her.

He gave a long, deep sigh, and Twilight could feel his shoulders beginning to shake.  His breath hitched.  Finally the dam burst, and Spike buried his face in her coat and sobbed.

If it had been any other pony, Twilight would have found herself bewildered and totally unsure of how to act.  But this was Spike, and she knew exactly how to help.  Running a comforting hoof over his spines, she hummed into his ear.  It was an old lullaby, one that Celestia had taught her, and it never failed to calm the dragon’s nerves.

By and by his cries tapered off, and they continued to sit like that for a time, neither speaking, neither moving.  Simply two companions enjoying the company of one another.  It was a wonderful moment, and Twilight wouldn’t have traded it for anything in the world.

But she hadn’t forgotten the reason behind their position, and when Spike pulled out of the embrace and sat upright, she prepared herself for whatever was to come.

“So, Rarity turned me down.”  He was trying to keep his voice steady, trying to be nonchalant.  But she could hear the tremor beneath his words.

“I wanted to ask her to the Grand Galloping Gala,” he continued.  “Not… not as a date or anything.  I mean, we’re both going anyway, right?  So I thought, maybe we could go together?  Walk claw in hoof, have a few dances, that kind of thing.”

He trailed off, no doubt imagining the possibilities.  Twilight hated dragging him back to reality, but she knew that avoiding things wouldn’t help at all.

“What happened?”

Spike shook himself out of the daydream.  “Well, I wanted things to be as nice as possible when I asked.  So I wore the bowtie she made me, bought the flowers, shined my scales, the works.  Before I asked, I even got Rainbow Dash to clear off all the clouds so the day would be perfect.”

Now came the part Twilight dreaded asking.  “And what did she say?”

Spike laughed hoarsely, a few tears leaking from his eyes.  Turning to her, he clasped both claws together and batted his eyelashes.

“Oh, Spike,” he said dramatically.  “What an absolutely charming proposition!  And going to such trouble, I’m flattered darling, truly!”

Dropping his claws, he flopped back against her side.  

“And I, like a dummy, got my hopes up that maybe she’d say yes.  But she said that she already had her eyes on Prince Blueblood, and that her only plan for the Gala was to catch his attention and win his heart.”

“And it simply wouldn’t do for me to arrive accompanied by another stallion, I mean dragon, now would it?  Why, Blueblood might think me already spoken for!  And we simply can’t have that, now can we,” he mimicked sarcastically.

Twilight couldn’t help but roll her eyes at the statement.  One thing Spike and Rarity had in common was a tendency to get lost in their fantasies.  But now the fashionista’s delusions of grandeur had steamrolled her assistant’s heart, and she couldn’t help the brief flare of anger that welled up in response.

“I’m sorry, Spike,” she said.  “But you know it was nothing against you, right?  Rarity, you know how stubborn she can be.  She’s just so focused on her plans for the night that she won’t consider anything else.  I’m sure she didn’t mean to hurt you.”

He sighed.  “I know, and it’s my fault, I guess.  I should have known better.  A beautiful, successful unicorn like her?  She could have any stallion that she wanted.  Why settle for less?  Why would anypony?”

Twilight balked.  He was blaming himself for this?  Obviously Rarity’s dismissal had wounded her little dragon’s confidence much more than she realized.

Spike looked himself over and frowned in disgust.  “What mare would ever want such a useless, pathetic baby dragon?”

“I would,” she whispered to herself.

Spike turned to her.  “What’d you say, Twi?”

She gasped, realizing that she hadn’t spoken quietly enough.  She had to cover her tracks, now!

“I, uh, just said that you’re being too hard on yourself,” she said brightly.

Confidence building, she shifted to a lecturing tone and plowed on.  “In fact, your self-evaluation was flawed in the extreme!  Heavily biased, and skewed entirely towards negative characteristics.”

“Wha… what,” he asked, completely overwhelmed by her vocabulary.

“What I am saying is that you are in no way pathetic, useless, or any similar adjective.  In fact, I submit to you that any mare would be extremely lucky to have you as their special somepony.”

He blushed at the compliment, but nonetheless folded his arms and gave her a challenging glare.  “Yeah, right.  You’re just saying that to try and make me feel better.”

“Not at all, Spike!  You see, ponies may lie, but the facts do not!  And you have consistently demonstrated a number of admirable traits.  You have proven to be friendly, courteous, trustworthy, loyal, helpful, kind, generous, brave, earnest, industrious, attentive, the list goes on!”

“Which conclusively proves that you would make an excellent coltfriend,” she finished with a confident smirk.

“But then, why aren’t I good enough for Rarity,” he asked.

Twilight grumbled to herself.  All that effort to build up his self-esteem, and they were right back to square one.

“Well, some mares can be very…” choosy, picky, close-minded, stubborn as an ox?  “specific in choosing their special someponies.  Rarity is one of those mares.  She wants a prince-”

“But I AM a prince,” Spike argued, and she was glad to see that his earlier despondency had all but vanished.

“But you don’t act like a prince,” she said, holding up a hoof to stop any further protests.  “Not the kind of prince Rarity wants, at least.  She wants a prince who always dresses in the finest, fanciest clothes.  One who never lets a hair on his mane get out of place.  Who’d never dream of playing tag with the neighborhood fillies or a game of tackle hoofball in the schoolyard.”

She gave his stomach a teasing poke.  “Especially not a prince who’d run away from getting his picture painted to go try and dig gems out of the garden.”

“Give me a break,” Spike protested.  “I was four years old!  Besides, it was boring having to stand there all day, and that stupid crown was heavy and kept sliding down over my eyes!”

The two shared a laugh as they remembered how Celestia had been forced to hold Spike immobile with her magic until the portrait could be completed.  As their chuckles died down, Spike looked up at her thoughtfully.

“So, if I didn’t do those things, and acted like a normal prince, Rarity might like me?”

The unicorn merely smiled.  “She might, but the real question is, would YOU like yourself like that?  You shouldn’t have to change who you are to find love, Spike.  Self-improvement is fine, but not if you become an entirely different person.”

Not sure if he was getting her point, she decided to use an example.  “Do you remember what Applejack and I always tell the Cutie Mark Crusaders?  That they should focus on the talents they possess, the qualities that define them?  It’s the same with you.  Trust me, Spike, you’re a wonderful dragon.  You should be yourself, and I promise you’ll find a mare that appreciates you, loves you for who you are, not because you’re trying to fit their image of perfection.

Spike looked up at her, a smile appearing on his face and confidence in his eyes.

“You know what, Twilight?  You’re absolutely right!”

She felt her heart speed up.  Oh Celestia, did that mean…

“I see now that I’ve been going about this all wrong.  But now you’ve opened my eyes!”

“Yes…” she said expectedly.

“I realize that to defeat my enemy, I have to become my enemy!”

“Ye… wait.  What?”

Spike had already jumped from the sofa and rushed over to Twilight’s writing desk.  Scribbling rapidly, he composed a short letter and sent it off in a burst of green flame.

Twilight was still frozen on the couch, trying to figure out exactly what in the hell was going on.

“There,” the dragon said proudly.  “It’s on its way.”

“On its… WHAT is on its way?  Spike, just what are you up to,” she managed to ask.

He cocked his head.  “Isn’t it obvious Twi?  I’m gonna get Blueblood to teach me everything he knows about being the right kind of prince!”

“The right kind of… didn’t you hear a single thing I said,” she demanded.

“Of course!  Right now I don’t act like the kind of prince Rarity wants, but if Blueblood teaches me how to be like him then he’ll lose his advantage.  Then since I’m already close friends with her, I’ll sweep her right off her hooves and she’ll finally be mine!”

Twilight slapped her forehead in exasperation, wishing she could somehow chase down and retrieve the letter before it reached its destination.

“Ugh, Spike!  You have completely missed the point!”

“Really?  I think it makes total sense.  Maybe you’re the one who missed the point!”

“Augh!”  Throwing her hooves up in defeat, she stomped back upstairs to her book.

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If there was one thing Prince Blueblood hated more than the Grand Galloping Gala, it was the week immediately preceding it.  For it was then that mares across the kingdom would band together in a unified attempt to make his life miserable.

As always, they achieved this by bombarding him with a seemingly endless deluge of mail.  Whether it be from a conniving socialite, a star struck maiden or a lovesick admirer, their goals were always the same.  To be the lucky mare whom he would choose to escort into the Grand Galloping Gala, destined to win his heart and become a princess of Equestria.

He grimaced just at the thought of it.  These ponies were insufferable enough through mere correspondence.  He doubted he’d be capable of stomaching their wheedling, fawning drivel face to face.

Which was why it was best not to even give them a chance.  Just politely but firmly turn them down, and he could avoid the grasping claws of courtship and eventual matrimony.  Even if that meant mailing a reply to every, last, one.

Adding his signature, he sealed the envelope and levitated it over to join the others.  The sight of his progress only heightened his despair.  The stack of outgoing mail was tiny, barely more than a hundred letters in all.  By comparison, the letters he had yet to examine formed a pile nearly three times as high.

He groaned and let his head fall to the table with a *thunk.*

“Another rough day, cousin?”

Too weary to look up, he settled for tilting his head so that the visitor was in sight.

“Good afternoon, Cadence,” he managed to grumble out.

“Afternoon?  Have you looked out the window lately?  Good evening would be more appropriate.”

Flopping his head to the other side, he looked out the windows and noticed that yes, the day was indeed fading into night.  It only soured his mood further, as he realized that he’d made even less progress than previously thought.

“From what the servants have mentioned, you’ve been cooped up in this room all day,” she chided, reaching out to prod a dish of ice-cold alfalfa penne.  “Not to mention Rosemary and Thyme are terrified that you’ve developed a hatred for their cooking after refusing to touch a single one of your meals.”

“I’ll be certain to apologize to them at once,” he said with a sigh.  “But as you can see, right now I’m more than a bit occupied.”

Taking a closer inspection of the daunting pile of letters, Cadence’s teasing smile fell into a sympathetic look.

“That time of year already,” she asked.

“I’m afraid so.  That magical time when mares of all ages set their sights upon the most eligible stallion in the land.”  He snorted in annoyance.  “I feel as though I’m the prized trout in a fishing pond, darting about as stallions on the bank cast their nets and hooks.”

Cadence laughed, and he found his mood lifting from her company.  “A fine comparison, but at least nopony has managed to reel you in quite yet.”

“Not for lack of trying.  One of the drawbacks to being a career bachelor, I suppose.  It almost makes me want to follow your example and tie myself down once and for all.”

She blushed.  “I wouldn’t describe it quite like that.”

“Still, it must make things much easier for you.  No need to worry or wonder about who’ll be escorting you, no legion of admirers to turn away, just the minor task of selecting your gown and off you go!  Why, I doubt it took you more than a day to ready yourself.”

“Even less than that,” she smirked.

He looked at her in confusion.  “How so?”

“Well, there was nothing to decide, because I’m simply not attending the Gala this year.”

“What?  Why ever not?”

She waved off his concern.  “Well, Shining Armour and I decided to… wait.  Remind me, cousin, have you met his parents?  Mr. and Mrs. Sparkle?”

The unicorn tapped his chin.  “Yes, I’m quite sure I have, though the occasions were few and far between.  They have a daughter as well.  Twilight, isn’t it?  A student of our aunt’s?”

“Correct.  And that is the reason why we’ll not be attending.  You see, Twilight’s parents have never once attended the Gala, and in years past, neither had she.  But this year will be her first.  Shining Armour and I felt that it would be unfair, even cruel to their parents if they were to be left alone whilst both children celebrated elsewhere.  So we chose to eschew the Gala in favor of spending time with them.”

Now Blueblood understood.  It was a sensible reason, even a gallant one.  Still, his lips turned up in a disbelieving smile.

“Why, you clever little minx!  That is genius, utter genius!  You’ve figured out an ironclad excuse for skipping this dreadful festivity!”

Cadence gave a scandalized gasp and put a hoof over her heart.  “Why Blueblood, I’m shocked!  How could you even suggest that my act of compassion could be hiding some ulterior motive!”

She managed to keep her wounded expression for nearly a minute before the two royals collapsed in a fit of laughter.

“Alright, alright,” so it’s not entirely altruistic,” she admitted.  “And I do feel a tad guilty for leaving auntie stuck greeting and mingling all by her lonesome.  I’m sure she’ll be bored out of her fur, desperate for a reprieve.”

“Your sympathy is appreciated,” a regal voice spoke up from behind.  They both turned to see a tall, white alicorn looking at them in amusement

“Good evening, Aunt Celestia,” Blueblood said with a slight bow.  Cadence was frozen in embarrassment, cheeks turning red as she tried to stammer out a response.

“Good evening to the two of you, as well,” she said before turning to Cadence with a teasing grin.  “And you needn’t worry about your poor, old auntie.  Not only will Luna be present to assist, but my faithful student has graciously volunteered to take your place in helping to admit our guests.”

Hoping to save his cousin from any further humiliation, Blueblood cleared his throat to draw Celestia’s attention.

“To what do we owe the pleasure of your visit, dear aunt?  Surely you must be tired after so recently setting the sun?”

The alicorn smiled and levitated a scroll off of her back.  “Why, I simply came to wish you both good night, and to deliver this.”

“Another one,” Blueblood whined, not caring that his royal manners had begun to slip.

The princess only chuckled.  “Trust me; this one won’t be nearly as frustrating.”

He unrolled the letter as Celestia took her leave, not bothering to hide his disgust.  Cadence had finally recovered from her mortification, and curiously leaned over to try and get a peek at the words.

“Another request from a mare, I imagine?  Or perhaps auntie has grown tired of you remaining single and wants to arrange a marriage?”

“I certainly hope not,” he grumbled.  “I shudder to imagine the kind of mare she’d try and saddle me with.”

With the letter opened, he sighed and began to read.  As his eyes moved over the page, his expression softened, and then turned into an outright smile.

“Well, this is certainly a surprise!  It’s a letter from Spike,” he said.

Cadence’s eyes lit up, though her words had the slightest tinge of jealousy.  “From Spike?  Really?  I hadn’t heard a peep from him since he moved to Ponyville!”

“Nor I,” he replied.

“So what does he say?  Is he doing alright?  Are they treating him well?  Tell me,” she demanded eagerly.

He opened his mouth to respond, but then his eyes reached the next line.  His brows furrowed.

“Oh my,” he said with a frown.  “It looks like he’s run into quite a bit of trouble.”

“He’s in trouble?!”

“Indeed so, and he’s asking for help.  Quite urgently, at that.”

Cadence was already rising to her hooves, looking as though she planned to fly to Ponyville immediately.

“Well?  What’s the problem?  Is he hurt?  In danger?  Do we need to leave now?”

“Calm down, Cadence!  At least let me finish the letter,” he snapped.

He returned to looking over the page, eyes darting back and forth as Cadence trotted in place anxiously.  But even as the alicorn’s tension built, the unicorn’s seemed to ease.  In fact, Blueblood was grinning when he finally placed the letter aside.

“It looks as though Spike does have a serious problem, though not as severe as what you’re imagining.  Rather, it seems he’s having romantic difficulties with a certain unicorn.”

If he’d looked up, Blueblood would see that Cadence was once again frozen in shock.  But this time the alicorn’s vibrant fur had paled to a sickly puce, her teeth were clenched, and one eye was twitching madly.

“Spike… needs romance help… with a unicorn,” she squeaked.  Her eyes shifted to the hallway that Celestia had trotted down, and she began to tremble.

Blueblood nodded, oblivious to her change in mood.  “Yes, poor lad.  It seems that his intended paramour is proving rather immune to his attempts at courtship.  He’s asking if I’ll come to his aid.”

Cadence looked at him as if he’d gone mad.  “You’re… you’re not really going, are you?”

“Why, of course I am,” he said.  “Our cousin needs me; how could I refuse?  But what about you?”

“Me,” she asked frantically.

“Of course!  Considering your expertise in matters of the heart and your affection for Spike, I’m surprised you even have to ask.”

To his complete surprise, Cadence began backing away, furiously shaking her head.

“No!  Oh, no no no.  Not again!  Not after what happened last time!”

He lifted a hoof to try and calm her down.  “Cadence, be reasonable.  Spike is only asking for romantic advice!  What’s the worst that-”

“I’D RATHER BE KIDNAPPED BY CHANGELINGS,” Cadence screamed before turning and galloping down the hall as if Cerberus himself were in pursuit.

Blueblood was dumbfounded.  ‘Well, she’s acting rather odd,’ he thought.  ‘I wonder what’s gotten into her?’

He shrugged, knowing better than to try and decipher the female mind.  Instead, he lifted his pen and unrolled a blank sheet of parchment.

“Dearest Spike,” he wrote.

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The royal chariot rolled to a stop just outside of Ponyville.  Thanking the pegasi guards, Blueblood stepped down and wrapped a simple travelling cloak over his body.

When he had received Spike’s reply, the first thing he had noticed was the bizarre series of requests that accompanied the time and place he should visit.  He chose to indulge his cousin, but that made the situation no less strange.  Why was it so vital that the chariot park outside of town?  That he disguise himself until he arrived at the library?  That he avoid the western section of Ponyville, especially some business called the “Carousel Boutique?”

He hadn’t the slightest of ideas, but if these conditions were so important to Spike, he would follow them.

Passing an outdoor café, he gave a brief wave to the dining ponies.  It pleased him to see them returning the gesture happily.  It seemed this town was quite the friendly one, a fine place for Spike to grow up.

His jaunt through Ponyville finally ended at a massive tree that housed the town library.  Certainly a more humble abode than Spike’s previous home, but it did have a certain rustic charm about it.  Lifting his hoof, he delivered the top-secret knock that he’d been provided:  Four quick knocks, two slow ones, a five second pause before a single knock, then a five second pause before six knocks in rapid succession.

At least he thought that was the correct sequence.  Right or wrong, he could hear hoofsteps approaching the door, then it opened to reveal the smiling face of a purple unicorn.

“Good afternoon, and welcome to the Golden Oaks Library!  Can… I… help you?”

She stared at him in confusion, bewildered at the sight of a fully cloaked and hooded stallion.

Removing the hood, he smiled and said, “You might.”

Twilight gasped and fell into a bow.  “Oh, Prince Blueblood!  It’s a pleasure to see you again.”

“The pleasure is mine, Miss Sparkle,” he said, returning the bow.  “May I be allowed to come in?”

“Of course, of course,” she said, fully opening the door and ushering him inside.

“So, you decided to come and help Spike after all,” she said, and he noticed that there was the slightest edge in her voice.  Almost like she disapproved of his presence.

He shrugged it off.  He was imagining things, no doubt.  He might not be as close to Twilight as his cousins, but the two unicorns had always shared a polite rapport.

“But of course,” he said.  “Dire as his situation is, how could I refuse the opportunity to assist?”

“Hey Twilight!  Who was at the… Blueblood!”  Spike had just emerged from the basement with a stack of books in his arms.  At the sight of their guest, he dropped them to the floor and rushed over.

“Oh ho!  And here’s the young rascal now,” Blueblood said with a laugh.  “Growing like a weed, he is!  I suppose it’s true what they say about the clean, country air.”

Twilight smiled at their banter as she levitated the books to a table.  “Yes, I think the move to Ponyville has done us both quite a bit of good.  Though leaving behind family has been the hardest part.”

Blueblood nodded in agreement.  “Perfectly understandable, though I imagine that only makes the reunions that much better.”

Hanging his cloak on one of the coat pegs, he gave the library another quick glance.  “Might we adjourn to a more comfortable locale?  From what Spike’s letters have told me, it seems we have much to discuss.”

“Oh, oh of course!  How rude of me!  Please, follow me!”  Twilight quickly ushered him over to the fireplace, rapidly pointing out each piece of furniture and comparing their cushioning qualities.

Once they were comfortably situated, Blueblood gave Spike his full attention.  “Now then, cousin, let us talk of business.  You summoned me here because a mare has spurned your affections, correct?  And you believe that I am capable of helping you overcome this problem?”

The dragon nodded quickly.  “Yeah!  You see, right now I’m not the kinda guy she wants.  And I think you know how to be like the guy she wants, so maybe you can make me that kinda guy, and then she’ll like me instead of that guy, or-”

“Calm down, calm down,” he chuckled.  “Let’s take this one step at a time.  Before we go any further, why not describe this unicorn?  Her appearance, her mannerisms, her likes and dislikes?  If I’m to help you win her heart, it would be prudent for me to learn all that I can.”

Spike gathered his thoughts and began to speak.  As he listened, Blueblood had to admit that this mare was certainly a rarity, more than just in name.  In fact, had he not known that she was a resident of Ponyville, he would have been certain that Spike was describing some well-bred Canterlot noble.  The eye for fashion, the elegant mannerisms, the intense dislike of filthiness and uncouth behavior.  It made him wonder how such a tasteful and, dare he say it, prissy lady came to inhabit these humble surroundings.

Next they moved on to physical descriptions, though he found it rather difficult to concentrate with Twilight’s interruptions.  The mare was constantly grumbling under her breath, rolling her eyes and huffing in annoyance as Spike adoringly described his crush.  Blueblood couldn’t exactly blame her; he supposed that she had been forced to listen to this several times in the past.

Still, there was something suspicious about her reactions, though he couldn’t quite put his hoof on it…

“Right then.  I believe I’ve heard enough to adequately envision this mare of yours.”  He chewed his lip, pondering the next step.  “Let us move on to how you’ve attempted to garner her affections.  I assume you’ve already worked your way through the basics: showering her with compliments and attention, assisting her whenever possible, providing comfort when in distress?”

Spike nodded vigorously.  “Yeah, all of that stuff!  And I mean, it’s not like she doesn’t appreciate it.  She just… doesn’t seem to take it seriously.”

“Have you tried being more direct,” Blueblood asked.  “Invite her out to dinner, or for a romantic stroll?  As a date to some festivity?”

“Uh huh,” Spike grumbled.  “She always seems to think it’s the cutest thing, but in more of a ‘just friends’ kinda way.”

“I can understand why you sought my assistance,” he said.  “After all, it does seem quite a conundrum.  You’ve acted chivalrously, aided her at every opportunity, and even made clear your desires to further the relationship.  In such a situation, what else is a gentledrake to do?”

“Well, maybe he could try all that on a mare that’d actually appreciate it,” a voice muttered from behind.

He looked over his shoulder.  Oddly enough, Twilight now seemed to be pouting, with her forelegs crossed over her chest and face averted.  It puzzled him to no end.  First Cadence, now her?  Either this entire situation was more complex and connected than he thought, or some unknown factor was causing the mares of Equestria to behave in the oddest of fashions.

Shaking his head, he looked back to Spike.

“Although… perhaps it’s not your methods, but your timing,” the unicorn suggested.  “When have you posed these questions?”

“Umm, well the last time was in her shop after we’d finished work for the day.  And then there was one time while we were out digging for gems, and then…”

Blueblood waved a hoof.  “Stop, stop, stop.  I think I may have figured out your problem.  In fact, it all makes sense now!”

“It does,” Spike and Twilight asked, one with hope, the other with suspicion.

“Of course!  After all, one can’t expect to woo his lady in such mundane and un-amorous surroundings!  Bringing up such matters in the workplace?  It’s only obvious she’d disregard them.”

Blueblood stood and began pacing across the room.  “No, you’ll need a more appropriate venue.  Somewhere that encourages joy and excitement.  Somewhere like… the Gala!”

Spike gulped.  “The… the gala,” he asked nervously.

“Yes, yes of course!”  Blueblood dropped to his knees and put a foreleg around Spike.  “Just think of it!  The two of you alone in the Canterlot gardens beneath a sky ablaze with stars!  Soft, sweet music filtering out from the ballroom.  Rarity, standing before you with the moon reflected in her eyes as you declare your love!  A perfect scenario, is it not?”

“Yeah…” Spike murmured dreamily.  “I mean, no!  It can’t be at the Gala!  You’ll, I mean HE’LL be there!”

“He,” Blueblood repeated in confusion.  “Oh wait, I remember now.  When I first arrived, you mentioned this ‘guy she wants,’ did you not?  No doubt you’re thinking of some high-born cad that is rivaling you for her heart!  Am I to assume that he’ll be attending as well?”

“Umm, you could say that…”  Spike said.

“Then you shouldn’t trouble yourself worrying,” Blueblood sniffed.  “I shall deal with him personally.  Tell me all about the lout’s character!  His flaws, his vices!  We’ll put the ruffian in his place.”

Spike gulped.  “Well, I wouldn’t exactly call him a ruffian.  He’s not that bad of a guy or anything…”

The stallion shook his head.  “No, Spike!  You mustn’t think that way.  No matter how upstanding a pony he may be, he is your mortal enemy on this battlefield of love!  You cannot give him an inch.”

“Yeah, but… I mean… Twilight?  Back me up on this,” Spike pleaded.

She only gave him a smug look.  “Go on Spike.  Like Prince Blueblood said, you can’t cut this guy any slack.”

“Gee thanks.”  Crossing his arms, Spike leaned back in his chair and tried to think.  The two unicorns watched expectedly as he pondered and puzzled.

Finally, Spike looked up.  “Well, I guess he’s kinda hard to talk to.  I mean, it’s not like some random pony on the street could walk up and just start visiting with him.  He’s… what’s the word, Twi?”

“Unapproachable, detached, remote,” the unicorn automatically recited.

“Yeah, all of those,” he said with a nod.

Blueblood considered it.  He grinned.  “Yes, yes that will do nicely.  We simply have to counter his aloofness!  Expose his inability to meet and socialize.  Why, just wait until your Rarity discovers that she cannot so much as strike up a conversation or even coax a smile out of the cad.  When his true nature is revealed, no doubt she’ll be mortified by her error, and realize that the dragon of her dreams has been by her side all along!”

“But, Blueblood?  About this stallion,” Spike tried to say.  The unicorn merely waved him off.

“Not another word about him, Spike!  As I said, I’ll handle the cur.  You, on the other hoof, should devote yourself entirely to how you’ll win Rarity’s heart.  When we meet at the Gala, you need only point him out, and I will keep him at bay.”

Ignoring Spike’s attempted interjections, he donned his cloak and exited the library.  “Don’t worry about a thing, cousin!  I promise you, it will be the best night ever!”

Prince Blueblood disappeared down the road, leaving the two occupants of the library in similar states of panic.

“Aw man!  What am I gonna do?  I’ll be trying to talk to Rarity, but Rarity’ll be going after Blueblood, and he’ll be trying to keep himself away from her!  We’re just going to chase each other around in circles,” he moaned.

Unbeknownst to him, his companion was likewise distressed as she began to consider the gravity of the situation.  Until now, she had never really felt pressed for time, had never dreamed of forcing or even approaching the issue.  Rather than make her affections known, she’d hoped to gradually induce Spike into reciprocation.  She’d always assumed that his crush for Rarity would dwindle, and that until then her infatuation with Blueblood would serve as a type of safety net.

But now it looked as if that net was fraying.

‘Oh, this is terrible,’ Twilight thought.  ‘As much as I hate to admit, this plan of theirs might actually work!  If Blueblood manages to sufficiently disenchant Rarity, she might actually give Spike a chance!  And if she does that, she’ll finally realize how great of a guy he is!  From there, the most statistically likely outcome would be them entering a committed relationship.  And if they start dating… I’ll never get my chance!  It will all be over!  No, I can’t lose him!  I won’t!’

Images flashed through her mind like a chain reaction of worst-case scenarios.

She could just imagine Rarity sitting alone in the gardens, head bowed, makeup running as she sobs.  But then two purple claws reach down to gently lift the strands of mane from her face.  She looks up, vulnerable and confused, to see a smile promising care and comfort.

Her teeth ground together, and the tiniest of glows appeared around her horn.

Relieved at the presence of a friendly face and desperate for affection, Rarity throws herself into Spike’s arms.  He merely holds her until the tears stop, knowing just how effective silent consolation can be.  After awhile, they rejoin their friends, but something has changed.  Rarity makes an extra effort to stay close to Spike.  There is something strange in her posture.  Something… possessive.

Spike took a hasty step back as sparks began to pop and crackle in the air.  Bolts of lightning pulsed across Twilight’s horn, and the air thickened with magic.

“Umm, Twi?  Are… are you okay,” he asked.

They arrive back at Ponyville, and Rarity becomes distraught.  She begs Spike to keep her company for night; the strain of her heartbreak is too much to endure alone.  Twilight protests, but in vain.  Spike, ever the gentledrake, will never refuse a plea for help.  The two friends retire to the Boutique.  There, in the familiar confines of home, the dam bursts.  Overcome with emotion, Rarity drowns her sorrows in wine and drowns Spike’s ears in histrionics.  He endures it without flinching, doing his best to piece together the broken shards of her heart.  Time passes.  The bottle grows empty.  Spurred on by the pleasant haze of drunkenness, Rarity’s heart and mind come to a hasty accord.  She leans in, eyes lidded seductively and suggests that they retire.  She asks if Spike will accompany her to bed?  Spike, ever so innocent and pure, accepts without a second thought.

Twilight’s eyes snapped open, glowing a brilliant white.  The library began to shake from the force of her magic, and every unsecured object rose into the air.

Spike yelped and dug his claws into the wood.  “Twi!  What are you doing?  Snap out of it!” 

Spike and Rarity arrive at the library early the next morning.  Neither speaks of the night before, but Twilight can tell something has changed.  Both are possessed with an almost drunken lethargy, every movement slow and content.  Occasionally, their gazes meet and sly, knowing smiles cross their faces.  Though they are both as friendly and kind as ever, Twilight feels somehow… removed.  As if they are linked in a way she will never understand, never be part of.

She is an outsider.  And she despairs.

The magical pull was too strong, and Spike found himself whipping through the air along with a multitude of other objects, orbiting Twilight as the mare’s magical meltdown continued.

From there, everything is a blur.  From afternoon strolls to romantic evenings.  The day comes when Spike leaves her, moving into the Carousel Boutique.  From there, intimacy turns to matrimony.  As the best mare at the wedding, Twilight forces herself to smile, though her stomach twists when Rarity tearfully announces that she is overjoyed to be gaining such a wonderful sister-in-law.  She knows that she should be happy for them.  It’s not their fault she waited too long, not their fault she wasn’t good enough.  But no matter how she tries to tamp down her jealousy, the sheer unfairness makes her want to rip her mane out.

Suddenly there came a violent, brutal tug on her mane.  Twilight yelped in pain as the hairs were nearly yanked out.  With her return to coherency, the magical discharge vanished, and the room was filled with crashes and clatters as a tornado’s worth of debris fell to the floor.

Blinking back tears, she looked down to see Spike hanging off the floor with a death-grip on her mane.

Visibly relieved, the dragon released his hold and plopped to the floor.  “Geez, Twi!  What was that all about?  I thought you were going to slingshot me through the roof along with half our home!”

“I’m so sorry, Spike,” she apologized.  “I was just worried about… something, and I guess I started channeling magic by reflex.”

Spike leapt to his feet and dusted himself off.  “Don’t worry about, I understand completely.  But what were you worrying about?”

She wished she could tell him.  How much she cared, how afraid she was of losing him.  How her mind was racing in circles to try and find a solution.  Some way to wean his attentions away from Rarity.

“Oh, nothing,” she said evasively.  “Just being myself.  You know old Twilight Sparkle, right?  She just can’t keep from freaking out.”

She could tell he wasn’t buying it, so she switched tactics.  “But you know what, Spike?  I think we should just put this whole situation out of our minds for the time being.  If not, all we’re going to do is worry ourselves sick!”

Spike nodded and put a hand over his stomach.  “That’s for sure.  Just thinking about it gives me a tummy-ache.”

“Good, then it’s decided!  No more fretting.  We’ll just let what happens, happen.”

“Easy for you to say,” he muttered.  “It’s not like your love life is at stake here.”

“Shows how much you know,” she shot back.

“What do you mean?”

She made a dramatic show of looking about the room.  “I was just thinking WOW! I really did a number on the place didn’t I?”

“Yeah, it’s pretty crazy.  When you set your mind to it, you do more damage than the Cutie Mark Crusaders with a day off from school and a sack of dynamite!  And you know what?”

His smile turned mischievous before he reached down and snatched up a fallen broom.  “Since you made this mess, I think YOU should have to clean it all up!”

Her heart nearly melted at the sight of his wide, beaming smile.  She thought of that nightmarish future, where he slowly but surely slipped from her grasp and into the hooves of another.

Desperate to redirect her thoughts, she gave him an incredulous look.  “Say what?”

“Yep!  I think it’s high time you learned to appreciate how much I bust my tail for you!  That’s why YOU get to be the assistant for today.”

She wanted to say that she appreciated him far more than he realized, but caught herself just in time.  “Oh, and I take it you’ll be Celestia’s student for the day?”

“I sure will,” he said with a nod.  “In fact, I’ve already got a friendship report thought up!”

Giving an exaggerated swing of the broom, he lifted his chin haughtily.  “Twilight, take a letter.  *Ahem!*  ‘Dear Princess Mom, through her crazy studying style of squinting at dusty old books and drinking WAY too much tea, Twilight has come to a real… rea…’ what’s the word, Twi?”

“Realization,” she said with a giggle.  “And I’m guessing you don’t want that question added in?”

“Oh, yeah.  Just, uh, scratch that part out.  Anyway, ‘Twilight has come to a realization.  She has decided that I, Spike, am totally awesome and should take over her job as your faithful student.’  You getting all this?”

“Of course, Mister Spike” Twilight said mockingly.  “Your delusions of grandeur are being painstakingly transcribed.”

“Nice!  You’ve already got my signature assistant sarcasm!  Now where was I?  ‘I am writing to inform you that in addition to the usual friendship reports, I will also be exploring new subjects, like the magic of gems, which will be sent to you via tastyness reports.’”

She laughed at the thought.  “Sounds like more of a culinary curriculum to me.”

“Oh hey, hey Twilight.  What if I told her that Rarity and I’d be getting together?”  He chuckled into his claws.  “And that I’d be sending her relationship reports too?  Do you think she’d freak out?”

Twilight paused.  Something about his question intrigued her.

“Relationship reports,” she asked.

“Yeah!  You know, like about dating and stuff.  We could tell her I’m doing romance studies too.”

The unicorn’s jaw dropped.  Romance studies.  All at once an idea formed in her head, something she’d never considered until now.

‘Wait, my studies!  That’s it, that’s how I can fix this!  I can cut them off at the pass!   That means… going straight to the top!’

Yes, yes this was perfect!  She wouldn’t have to confront either of them, and it wouldn’t be some drastic and sudden change for her and Spike.  They wouldn’t even have to go through with it right away.  No, it was more of a… a safety measure!  Yes, a way to stake her claim, so to speak.  Once this was taken care of, she’d have all the time in the world to makes things perfect.

Spike gulped as Twilight’s face lifted into a crooked and altogether devious grin.  Hesitantly, he reached up and poked her on the nose with the broom handle.

“Uh, hello?  Twilight, you okay?”

Her eyes snapped down to him, her grin widening.  “Why yes, Spike!  I’m doing just fine!”  

Spike’s initial burst of relief faded back into wariness.  “Are you SURE about that?  The last time you acted like this, you got chased around by a hydra and wound up bursting into flames.”

“That was an isolated incident caused by my attempt to apply rationality and logic to an utterly alien and therefore unknowable concept.”

She leaned in close, her smile stretched from ear to ear.  “But this time is different.  This time the problem is tangible and capable of being directly solved.  In fact, I think I’ve just found the solution to our little Gala problem!”

“You mean it,” he asked anxiously.  Her nod only stoked his excitement, and he tossed the broom over his head with a whoop of joy.  “Yes!  No more worrying, no more awkwardness, no more disappointment!  I’m finally gonna get myself a marefriend!”

“You sure will,” she said reassuringly.

‘In fact, you’ve had her all along.  You just don’t remember it.’

Rubbing her hooves together, she made her way up the stairs.  She had a plot to plan…

Spike ran to the base of the stairs and yelled up after her.  “Hey, wait a minute!  What about cleaning up this mess?  What kind of assistant are you?!”
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Hope everyone enjoyed, and see you next chapter!

> 2. So Far, So Good...
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter Two up and running.  Much like the episode, this one's a bit sappy and fluffy before things go downhill for everypony involved.  Enjoy!


Love works a different way
In different minds;
The fool it enlightens
And the wise it blinds.

-John Dryden





Chapter 2- So Far, So Good…

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It was finally time; the day of the Gala had arrived.  In but a few short hours, the hopes and dreams of he and his friends would (hopefully) come to fruition.  Spike should have been overcome with excitement, an anxious bundle of nerves.

‘Should’ being the key word.  Strange as it might have seemed, his heart was not a flutter and his thoughts were not racing.  Simply put, at the moment he just did not give a shit.

No, right now he was in a most despondent mood, one with which Nightmare Moon or Discord might easily sympathize.  But how could that be?  What could possibly connect him to two of the greatest dangers Equestria had ever faced?

To answer that, one would only have to look at his situation.  Once his friends were nearly finished preparing for the Gala, Rarity had quickly and firmly shooed him back outside.  The unicorn had insisted that prior to their grand arrival, nopony, or dragon should be allowed to see them in their dresses.

Spike didn’t see what the big deal was.  So what if he saw them first?  It wasn’t like that’d ruin the surprise for the rest of Canterlot.

Rarity was not amused by his rebuttal.  Advancing until they were almost nose to nose, she looked him straight in the eye and gave a short, simple command.

“Out.”

That one word was said with enough frost to kill half of the Apple family’s orchards.  In the interest of self-preservation, Spike marched right out the door, up to the coach, and planted himself firmly into his seat.  Then, he began to wait.

And that is where his connection to the aforementioned villains becomes apparent:  Trapped in a confined and singular location for a potentially infinite span of time with no hope of escape.  Granted, he wasn’t magically imprisoned on a satellite or bound in stone, but he would quickly argue that the Wrath of Rarity was far, far worse.

So here he was, waiting until a group of mares finishing getting dressed, did their make-up, and whatever the hell else girls did.  And just like the alicorn and draconequus before him…

He.  Was.  Bored.

Tilting back his head, he drew in a deep breath and sighed as loudly as he could.

“Would you quit it with the sighing already,” an irritated voice said.  “It’s not gonna make this go any faster.”

He looked up to see the two stallions Rarity had persuaded to pull the coach.  The one hitched closest to him was glaring back over his shoulder.

“I can’t help it,” Spike protested.  “They’ve been in there FOREVER!”

“Uh huh…”

“Well, what’s taking so long?  I mean, what are they doing?”

The stallion tapped his chin with a hoof.  “Who knows,” he asked.  “There are more things in heaven and earth, Horseatio, Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.”

That only confused Spike more.  “Say what?”

His companion gave a dark chuckle.  “It means,” he said in a low and ominous voice, “that what goes on behind those doors is something not for colts to understand.  Things, perhaps, that we are not ready to know.  That we are not capable of knowing.  Eldritch truths that would shatter our fragile male minds.  Things too horrifying to comprehend!”

The stallion had turned around fully, and was looking up at him with a sinister smile, forelegs spread outward like he was telling a ghost story.

Spike gulped.  “Wha… wha… what kind of things?”

The tense atmosphere dissipated as the stallion gave a laughing shrug.  “No idea!  And I’m sure not stupid enough to try and find out!  I mean, come on.  Do YOU want to march back over there, knock on the door and ask them what they’re up to?”

Spike looked back at the boutique.  Maybe it was just his imagination, but the structure seemed to have suddenly taken on a foreboding air.

“I, uh, I think I’ll pass.”

The stallion patted him on the back.  “Smart choice.  Yessir, even the bravest and most foolhardy of coltfriends have learned not to fight the inevitable.  So when times like these come, it’s best just to accept it.”

“Accept it?  You mean this happens a lot?”

The pony laughed.  “All the time, kiddo.  If I had a bit for every minute I wait around for my wife to… well, you’ll see what I mean when you find a mare of your own.”

A vision passed through his mind of him waiting outside Rarity’s boutique, covered in dust and cobwebs as the unicorn painstakingly searched through her massive wardrobe.

Shuddering, he asked, “How do you keep from going crazy just sitting around?”

The stallion thought for a moment.  “Well, it gives you a lot of time to think, that’s for sure.  Myself, I like to go over our plans for the night.  Shooting from the hip might be good on the first date, but mares like it when their guy’s prepared.  So I use the time to rehearse what I’ll say, how I’ll act, that kind of thing.  Aside from that… oh!  I also like to think up funny limericks!  Listen to this!  ‘There once was a colt who bent over…’”

But Spike was no longer listening.  Instead, he was staring down at his claws, feeling as though his heart had dropped into his stomach.  “Plans for the night,” he thought to himself.

As Twilight had suggested, he’d purposely avoided any thoughts about the plan to win Rarity’s heart.    But those four little words had focused his thoughts squarely upon it.

It was surreal.  Only days before he had all but given up hope on ever winning Rarity’s affections.  Now, they would soon be on their way to the Gala, where Blueblood was waiting to help him attain true love.  He should have been ecstatic, hopeful, or content at the very least.

But he didn’t feel any of those.  Instead, he felt nervous.  It was the bad kind too, the kind of dreadful anticipation you feel when you know things are going to end badly, like when he’d accidentally burned Twilight’s astronomy book.  There was something else, too, just beneath it.  Guilt.

He didn’t understand why.  What did he have to feel guilty about?  All they were doing was trying to get Rarity to like him.  Right?  It was the same as everything he’d done before.

But then… why did it feel wrong this time?

But try as he might, Spike was unable to come up with an answer.  And so he sat, lost in thought as the boutique’s door cracked open and Rarity ordered them to avert their eyes.  He remained oblivious even as the girls piled inside the coach and set off.

For now, he could only wait and wonder.

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As their coach was drawn towards Canterlot, the six mares inside were all but bouncing off the walls.  With barely contained excitement, they discussed their plans for the evening, chattered about their predictions for success, and wished one another luck in their endeavors.

All except one.

Lost in thought, Twilight Sparkle drummed her hoof against the door.  She stared blankly at the passing scenery and was constantly mumbling under her breath. 

The mare sitting across from her leaned over in concern.  “Twilight, dear, are you alright,” Rarity asked.  “You haven’t made a peep since we departed from Ponyville.”

The lavender unicorn blinked as if coming out of a trance.  “Oh, yes!  I was just… uh, what I meant to say is…”

She laughed nervously and rubbed her head.  “What was the question again?”

Rarity gently slapped Twilight’s hoof away.  “None of that darling!  You certainly don’t want to muss up your mane before we’ve even arrived.  And I was simply asking if everything was alright?  You’ve been very quiet, not to mention staring out the window so hard I feared you’d burn a hole through the glass.

“Oh, right,” Twilight said.  “Sorry about that.  I’ve just been rehearsing.  You know, practicing what I’m going to say, seeing if any words don’t sound right.  That kind of thing.”

“Goodness, whatever are you practicing for?  Have you been asked to give some manner of speech?  Or were you planning to make an announcement?”

Twilight giggled.  “Nope, no speeches for me.  And I am hoping for a particular announcement, but I’m not planning to be the one giving it.”

Now Rarity was intrigued.  Hushing the others into silence, she turned back to Twilight.  “And just what are these plans, darling?  You simply must tell us!  After all, we’ve shared our hopes and dreams for tonight.  It’s only fair you do the same.”

Twilight gulped as she felt five pairs of eyes focused upon her.  For a brief moment, she considered spilling the entire truth.  She’d kept it to herself for so long, she was just itching to tell.  She looked between each of the expectant faces.  What would it hurt?  She was sure they’d all be quite happy, even willing to help should the need arise.  She opened her mouth to speak.

And then snapped it shut immediately.  What was she thinking?  She’d made a promise to Celestia herself not to speak a word about it to anypony for any reason.  She couldn’t break that promise now, not when her request might depend on it.

Trying to act nonchalant, she gave a brief shrug.  “Oh, nothing too fancy.  I’ll be assisting Princess Celestia in receiving and greeting new arrivals.  With so many ponies attending, she’ll be counting on me to keep things running smoothly.  It’s a very prestigious responsibility!

The girls’ enthusiasm deflated, and Rainbow Dash made a gagging noise.  “Are you kidding us,” the pegasus demanded.  “THAT’S how you’re gonna spend this once in a lifetime night?  By standing around being a doormare?  That’s totally lame!”

Applejack gave her a hard nudge in the ribs.  “Knock it off an’ leave her be, Dash.  T’aint none of yer business how she decides ta’ spend her night.”

Twilight only smiled.  “It’s alright, really.  I know it sounds pretty boring, but it will be wondeful just to spend time and visit with my mentor again.  And besides, we have some very important things to discuss.”

Pinkie bounced up and down in her seat.  “Ooh!  What kind of important things?  Like secret things?”

“Veeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrryyyyyyyyyyyy secret things,” Twilight said deviously.  She leaned forwards and lowered her voice.  The other mares crowded around in suspense.  “Life-changing things.  Things that matter to me greatly.  Things which are too important for me to mess this up…”

You could have heard a pin drop in the carriage.  Each mare held her breath in silent anticipation, feeling as though some great and universal truth was about to be divulged.

In a sense, this conversation would set the tone for the rest of the night, because they were about to be very disappointed.  Rather than spill the beans, Twilight merely sat back up, folding her hooves and giving them a satisfied grin.

“Which is why I need to prepare myself so I know exactly what to say and how to say it,” she finished.

The others groaned at her lackluster conclusion, but Rarity nodded in agreement.

“An excellent idea, Twilight!  I know exactly what you mean, for I am facing the very same situation with Prince Blueblood.  Just as you must carefully choose your words and weigh your responses, so must I be prepared to react to whatever romantic situations he gallantly presents.

The white-coated unicorn sighed dreamily and put a hoof to her chin.  “For instance, how should I compose myself in that first magical moment when our gazes meet?  How best shall I introduce myself that comes across as sophisticated, yet playful?  Flirtatious, yet poised?  And, oh dear me, how ever shall I react if he were to propose this very night?!”

“Just think!  Tonight is the night I achieve my dream, get my happily ever after, and bag myself a prince!”

The other ponies cringed as Rarity let out a shrill squeal of delight, though Twilight only mirrored her dreamy smile.   Unseen by the rest, her eyes flicked up to the front wall of the coach, where she knew a particular dragon was sitting.

‘Funny,’ she thought to herself.  ‘That’s exactly what I’m hoping for.’

Her smile faded as she realized just what her friend was up against.  Blueblood was notoriously standoffish towards what he viewed as empty flattery or flirtation.  Considering that he would also be doing whatever was necessary to drive her away from him and towards Spike, it was unlikely that Rarity would even have a chance.

Unless…

Twilight looked back to Rarity.  She knew that Spike would be crushed if he learned what she was about to do.  He’d see it as a betrayal.

Well then, he just wouldn’t find out.  After all, she already planned to make him the happiest drake in the world.  So why couldn’t she bring two friends together at the same time?

“Listen Rarity,” she said.  “I’m not sure if you realize this, but Blueblood, well he’s not like other Canterlot ponies.”

The other unicorn gave her a patient chuckle.  “Well, obviously not, darling.  He IS a prince; it’s only natural that he far exceeds the average noble in terms of chivalry and refinement.”

She groaned.  “That’s not what I meant.  It’s more his personality.  You… well you just shouldn’t treat him differently, okay?”

Rarity looked scandalized.  “Twilight!  You’re not suggesting that I behave as though he were some common stallion!  That would be terribly improper.”

She waggled her hoof chidingly.  “Uh-uh, that’s what you might expect, but the truth is entirely the opposite.”

Twilight could tell that she had Rarity’s attention, so she leaned closer.  “Let me tell you a secret.  The royal family, from Celestia all the way down, hate being fawned over by their subjects.  They want to be respected, of course, but not worshipped.”

“You see, Blueblood has to deal with admirers and servants all the time.  About all he hears are compliments and praise and common courtesy.  And it drives him nuts!”

“How do you know all this,” Rarity asked in astonishment.

Twilight merely smirked.  “Come on, you didn’t think I spent all my years in Canterlot just sitting in the library, did you?”

Rarity gave her a meek smile.  “Well… now that you mention it…”

“Arg!  Why does everypony assume that I had no social life before we came to Ponyville,” Twilight complained.

“Anyway, the point is, Blueblood won’t even give you the time of day if you come across like every other pony he’s ever met.  You need to show that you want to get to know the real him, not just stick him up on a pedestal to admire and flaunt.”

Rarity bit her lip.  “Do you really think that it would make a better impression if I were to treat him like a regular pony?”

“Absolutely!  Act respectful, of course, but don’t be afraid to be yourself.  Just be the Rarity we all know and love, and I promise he won’t be able to resist.”

“Thank you so very much, Twilight,” she said.  “I’ll be certain to…”

The moment was lost as Pinkie began bouncing up and down in her seat.  “Ooh!  Look, look!  We made it to Canterlot!”

Glancing out the window, she saw that they had indeed arrived at her hometown.  The familiar scenery drew her thoughts to home and family, and a rather devious idea followed soon after.

‘Maybe I can give Rarity a little more help, and get some alone time with Spike while I’m at it.’

Nudging the door open a crack, she stuck her head out and looked towards the front.

“Spike,” she called.  “Do you think you could make a quick detour?”

“Um, sure,” he answered.  “But where are we going?”

“To my family’s house.  You remember how to get there, right?”

“You bet!  I know these streets like the back of my claw,” he boasted as the coach turned down one of the many side-streets.

Leaning back inside, she noticed her friends peering out the windows with identical looks of confusion.  Applejack was the first to voice their collective concerns.

“Uh, Twi?  You sure this is the way we’re ‘sposed to be goin?  I mean, I know Canterlot ‘bout as well as a goose knows a gopher-hole, but I’m purty sure this ain’t the way ta’ the castle.”

“Spike and I have to make one little stop first,” she explained. “You girls can just go ahead without us.”

Pinkie’s mane deflated.  “But… but I thought we were all gonna go to the Gala together,” she whimpered.  “How come you and Spike are ditching us?”

Oh, we’re not ditching you,” Twilight reassured her.  “We just have something to take care of, and then we’ll catch up to you before long.”

“Okie-dokie!  Just don’t take too long or you’ll miss the party,” Pinkie said, already back to her normal self.

Rainbow Dash gave Twilight a suggestive grin.  “Wait, wait, wait.  You AND Spike have to make a stop?  You sure you’re not planning to just skip the whole thing and have a little private party with just the two of you?”  She puckered her lips and made several exaggerated kissing sounds.

Twilight’s face lit up in a furious blush.  “WHAT!?  No, it’s nothing like that!  I… I just want to stop by and visit my parents!  They haven’t seen either of us in quite awhile.”

“Ohhhhhh, I get it now,” Dash said as her grin stretched wider.  “Yeah, this is just like those dances they’d have at flight camp!  You’re doing that whole ‘introduce my date to the parents’ thing, aren’t you?”

Damn, busted!  Feeling as if seventy-five point twelve percent of her blood was occupying her cheeks, she quickly tried to stammer out some kind of rebuttal.

Spurred on by Twilight’s flustered response, the pegasus stuck out both hooves as if framing an invisible picture.  “I can see it now! Your mom’s gonna get all mushy about how cute you two are, and your dad’s gonna give Spike that macho ‘you better be good to my daughter’ talk, and then you two are gonna make your grand, romantic entrance, right?”

Twilight could only sit there, blushing red as a tomato and mouth hanging open, wondering when the hell Dash learned how to read minds.

Luckily, Rarity came to the rescue.  “That’s quite enough teasing, Rainbow Dash,” she said crossly.  “Can’t you see you’re embarrassing her?”

Dash gave an indignant ‘hmph’ and crossed her forelegs.  “Fine!  Sheesh, I was just kidding.  I mean, it’s not like that’s really what you’re doing or anything, right Twi?”

“And why would it be so bad if she was,” Fluttershy asked quietly.  “I happen to think that Twilight and Spike would make a lovely couple.”

“So do I,” Pinkie said, giving Twilight a very smug and very KNOWING smile.  “I bet you two would be just great together!”

Twilight’s eyes nearly popped out of her head.  “You… you did,” she managed to squeak, trying to think of a way out of the conversation before it went any further.

Thankfully, the coach rolled to a stop as Spike announced their arrival.  Not wasting a moment, Twilight kicked open the door and leapt out.

“Wow, Twilight!  You look beauti… AUGH!”

The remaining Elements caught a glimpse of Spike being magically yanked from his seat and hastily dropped onto Twilight’s back.

“Well, gotta get going but we’ll see you atthegalaenjoytherestofthetripokaybye!”

The door slammed shut, and they could hear the telltale bang and magical flash of Twilight’s teleportation.  A few moments passed, and then the coach once again rolled into motion.  Inside, the five mares could only look at one another in bewilderment.

“What’n tarnation was THAT all ‘bout,” Applejack finally asked.

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As the Gala kicked into full-swing, many of the recurring guests noticed that one element was vastly different from previous years.  That element was Prince Blueblood.  Normally the stallion would be trudging about the room, glumly exchanging pleasantries, refusing dance invitations, and generally looking as though he’d rather be undergoing a root canal without anesthesia.

But tonight there was a twinkle in his eye and a bounce in his step.  He surveyed the numerous guests critically, as though there was somepony that he was determined to identify.  His body seemed tense and ready to spring.  Nopony could remember seeing him so active, so full of energy, so awake before.

In truth, Blueblood was absolutely exhilarated.  Whereas normally he would be watching the clock and praying for this night to end, now he welcomed the festivities.  Even the sleep-inducing drollness of the band couldn’t make a dent in his enthusiasm.

He took another glance around the room, hoping to catch a glimpse of Spike and his group, or perhaps this mystery stallion that he would be intercepting.  He couldn’t wait to put his plan into action.  What a night it would be!  Not only would he be safeguarding a lady’s honor from an unworthy suitor, he would be greatly assisting Spike in his hour of need AND helping two close friends find true love.

‘Just wait until Cadence hears about this,’ he thought gleefully.  ‘Claiming that I know nothing of love?  That I’m absolutely clueless when it comes to the fairer sex?  Hah!

And Celestia!  Wouldn’t she be ecstatic at the news?  He could just imagine how thankful she would be…

The castle doors were flung open to thunderous applause.  Two figures emerged into the sunlight as ponies wept and cheered.  Claw in hoof with his unicorn bride, Spike waved joyfully to their many subjects.

As the two rushed to their carriage, wedding party close behind, two ponies remained in the doorway.

Tears poured down Celestia’s face, and she futilely levitated tissue after tissue to dab her cheeks.  Looking over to Blueblood, she smiled through her sobs.

“Oh, nephew!  Thank you, thank you so very much!”

He smiled humbly.  “It was nothing, auntie.  I did it all for Spike.”

“And I’m so grateful you did,” she sniffled.  “You helped my son find his soulmate, you brought them together, and best of all, you’ve given me the most wonderful daughter-in-law!  I just cannot wait to tell my grandchildren all about how you helped their parents meet.”

“All in a day’s work,” he said.

“And to think, I used to view you as a hopeless and irredeemable fop!  More likely to be mauled by a manticore than find a mare of your own!  I’ve never been so glad to be proven wrong!”

He balked.  “Um… thank… you?”

“For so long, I didn’t know what to think,” she continued.  “That you were socially inept?  That you were unable to commit?  That you were terrified of females in general?  That you were secretly impotent?”

“Wha… WHAT,” he sputtered.

She nodded gravely.  “I was even preparing to marry you off to some old nag who would mother you sufficiently so as to be unthreatening.  I’d even commissioned a ball and chain to be made so you’d be unable to run off.”

“But now I see I was worrying for nothing,” she said happily, oblivious to his horrified stare.  “Now I see that you are truly an expert in matters of the heart, and obviously biding your time until the right mare appears.”

She patted his cheek.  “It is SUCH a relief to know that you won’t die a miserly old virgin after all.”

“Gah!”  He shook his head frantically, trying to clear the images from his thoughts.  Since when had his daydreams taken such a self-deprecating turn?

‘Still, once she learns that I was responsible for Spike winning the mare of his dreams, she’ll have no choice but to acknowledge my romantic genius!  She’ll be groveling for my forgiveness!  Groveling, I say!’

He threw back his head and loosed a triumphant chortle, causing several nearby ponies to recoil nervously.

But before his megalomania could be sufficiently vented, a large commotion broke out from the castle entrance.  Curious, he headed towards the disturbance.

A mare to his left was tugging at her husband’s foreleg, eyes filled with excitement.

“Darling, did you hear?  The Elements of Harmony have arrived!  We simply must go and introduce ourselves!”

“Indeed,” the stallion said.  “Quite appropriate to pay one’s respects to the saviors of the world, after all.”

He fell in step behind them, half-amused and half-disgusted at the number of ponies already showing their sycophantic natures.  He wondered how Twilight’s friends would react to such idolatry?  He hoped they would not be too overwhelmed.

Coming to one of the balconies overlooking the entrance, he looked over the crowd of ponies waiting to be admitted.  Being that he, shamefully, had no idea what the Elements even looked like, he sought for the familiar hues of purple that would denote either his cousin or Twilight.  Considering that they had yet to arrive, this was a rather pointless endeavor.

Yet he continued to search, leaning out over the railing like the most overdressed figurehead to ever adorn a ship.  But what he didn’t realize was that one particular mare had already locked onto him and was stealthily approaching.

The sound of a clearing throat caught his attention, followed by a soft and hesitant voice.  “Excuse me?  Prince Blueblood?”

A chill ran up his spine as he recognized the awestruck, even reverent tone.  So here it was, the first one of the night.  Biting back a sigh, he plastered a smile on his face and turned, ready to deliver a polite but unyielding rejection to his admirer.

But then their eyes met, and his jaw dropped.

His first intelligible thought was that the unicorn before him was utterly gorgeous.  She carried herself with a truly natural grace, none of that pomp and forced elegance that so many other noblemares practiced.  Even more shocking, she wasn’t freaking out or drooling all over the floor just from the sight of him.

“Oh!  Uh, good, good evening my lady,” he said, struggling to compose himself.  “How can I be of service?”

An exuberant grin formed on her lips, and he inwardly cringed.  He knew what was coming.  Next would be the ear-splitting squeal, the pronouncement of true love, and possibly either the request for betrothal or immediate offer to bear his children.

To his great surprise, the unicorn merely drew in a breath and favored him with a much smaller, much saner smile.

“I do hope you’ll forgive the interruption, my lord,” she said, curtseying lightly.  “I was hoping to meet and perhaps make your acquaintance, if it isn’t too much of a bother?”

What was this?  A mare that wasn’t singing his praises or attempting to seduce him outright?  One that was attempting civil conversation?  Blueblood was delighted at the prospect.

“Why, it’s no bother at all,” he exclaimed.  “In fact, I only wish you had introduced yourself sooner!”

She giggled daintily into her hoof.  “Had the opportunity arisen, I assure you I would have done just that.  But you see, this is my first time attending the Gala.  In fact, it is my first time even visiting the castle.”

“You don't say!  And  tell me, are you making this visit unaccompanied,” he asked.

The mare ducked her head bashfully.  “Ye… yes, I am.  But what are you suggesting?”

He cursed himself for acting so forward.  Now that he’d finally found a potential source of pleasant company, the last thing he wanted to do was frighten her away.

“Well, I, um, simply did not wish to intrude if you were here in the company of another,” he explained hurriedly.  “However, if you have no other engagements, I would be happy to provide you with a tour of the castle.”

Her head snapped up immediately, smile wide and hopeful.  “Would you really?  Why, I’d be delighted!  That is… if there are no other matters to which you must attend.”

“Oh, I do have one vital matter to attend to,” he said.  “But the lad has yet to arrive, so I see no problem in conversing with a new friend.”

He offered his hoof, which she gladly accepted.  As he led her further into the hall, he once again stole a glance at the unicorn.  

But this time, as his eyes eagerly took in her beauty, appreciation faded as he began to recognize certain features.  The gears in his head began to turn.

Coat as white and pure as freshly driven snow?  Check.

A delicate violet mane so perfect that its curls looked to be sculpted by the wind itself?  Check.

Eyes as blue as the Coltarado sky?  Check.

A cutie mark depicting a triad of blue diamonds?  Most likely, but he couldn’t exactly see through her dress… much as he might like to.

Wait a minute…

“My lady,” he said in hesitation.  “You must forgive my deplorable manners, but I realize now that I’ve not yet learned the identity of my companion.  Please, might I know your name?”

“Of course, Prince Blueblood!  You may call me Rarity.”

A sudden, inexplicable sense of disappointment filled his heart.  That settled it.  It truly was her, Element of Generosity and the object of Spike’s affections.  Even if her name had somehow been oxymoronically common, she matched the dragon’s love-struck description perfectly.

Even worse was the look in her eyes.  Hope, timidity, affection, and perhaps even the slightest hints of lust.  And all of it was focused directly on him.

That meant that the upper-class snob who Rarity desired, Spike’s rival whom Blueblood had pledged to sabotage and foil at every opportunity… was himself.

Well.

Shit.

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With Spike in his usual place atop her back, Twilight skillfully navigated her way through the bustling streets and towards Canterlot Castle.  Their passing caused ponies of all ages to stop in their tracks, eliciting countless stares and a buzz of curious whispering.  Though it had once been common for the crown prince and Celestia’s student to be seen in one another’s company, it was public knowledge that the two had since moved to the small town of Ponyville.  To have them suddenly reappear in the city, dressed in such finery and obviously off to some formal engagement, was enough to interest even the most indifferent onlookers.

This attention went completely unnoticed, as the pair was each lost in their own separate thoughts.

Spike twiddled his claws, his eyes constantly drifting up to the castle as though he hoped that would hasten their arrival.

“Come on, Twilight!  We’re gonna be late.”

“Calm down,” she chided gently.  “The Gala lasts all night, you know.  We’ll get there with plenty of time to spare.”

“But why not just teleport us into the castle?  Then we’d get there in plenty of time!”

“No, Spike.  You now how startling it can be when I suddenly appear right in the middle of a group.  I don’t want our arrival to wind up terrifying half the castle.”

“Well, can’t you at least speed up a bit,” he whined.

The unicorn only shook her head in amusement.  “Haste makes waste.  The last thing either of us needs is for me to trip and both of us to face-plant into a mud puddle.  How are you going to woo Rarity if you arrive covered in dirt?”

Spike merely huffed and settled back to wait, allowing her to continue at a leisurely pace.  In all honesty, Twilight COULD have gone at least a bit faster, but she was too busy enjoying the moment.

The meeting with her parents could not have gone better.  They had both been heavily doted upon, with her family happily informing Spike that they just knew he and Twilight were perfect for one another and she could not have found a better coltfriend. She only hoped that their encouragements would subtly warm Spike up to the idea.

Though he’d had clearly been nervous and embarrassed, he had gone along with the whole thing rather than try and argue.  With any luck, his lack of protest was a good sign.

The only downside to their detour was the unexpectedly strange behavior of Cadence and her brother.  The older couple had voiced their own compliments and approval, but something about their demeanor seemed… strained.  As if they were on the verge of a full-blown panic attack.  Cadence had almost seemed ready to bolt the moment they stepped inside the house!

Then there was the final piece of advice Shining Armour had given them…

Twilight rose to her hooves, carefully smoothing out the wrinkles that had formed in her dress.  Spike gave her an inquiring smile, and she nodded before leaning down so he could hop onto her back.  Saying their goodbyes, they turned to the door.

“AHEM!”

The unicorn and dragon turned around to see Twilight’s brother on the receiving end of a very harsh maternal stare.

“Oh, uh, right,” he muttered before looking up with a forced smile.

“You two have fun tonight, just make sure to be on your best behavior, okay?”

“Don’t worry,” Twilight said.  “You can trust us.”

He nodded with a look of relief.  “Good to hear.  But remember, don’t do anything Cadence and I wouldn’t do.”

She and Spike didn’t seem to find anything wrong with that statement, but the second it left the stallion’s mouth Cadence gasped and looked up at him in mortification, and their mother slammed her teacup down hard enough to spill half the contents.

“No, no, no,” that’s not what I meant, he stammered, sweating under the glares of his mother and marefriend.  “I should have said, don’t do anything we WOULD do.  Oh, jeez, I mean… um… things that we might do together.  Just don’t-”

He winced as Cadence gave him a swift kick to the leg.  The alicorn’s scathing look was enough to shut him up, and a tense moment passed before she gave a wide and fake smile to the bemused couple.

“You two should get going!  Have fun, and forget everything your brother just said!”

Twilight had known better than to argue, and raced outside before the fireworks began.

“What did Shining say that was so bad,” Spike finally asked.

“I’ve got no idea.”

Even from half a block away, they could hear the muffled shouts of Twilight’s mother going into full-lecture mode.

“He’s toast, isn’t he?”

“Yep.”

Regardless of her family’s oddities, it had been a wildly successful endeavor.  All that remained was convincing Celestia herself.  Considering that her parents had fully approved, and even her friends had given support (indirect though it was), she was confident that there was no chance of failure.

Ideally, the other phase of her plan was proceeding just as smoothly.  Their procrastination and absence should have given Rarity more than enough time to seek out Blueblood and move past introductions.  Twilight could only hope the fashionista heeded her advice.  After all, it was the key to exploiting Blueblood’s weakness.

Twilight knew that the prince’s disgust towards courtship was not the prospect of romance, but rather the shallow and vapid way it was usually presented.  He would no doubt expect Rarity to be reduced to a quivering mess of nerves, trying to appeal to his vanity and title and all but throwing herself at him.

But if she presented herself as a friendly and genuinely interested companion, the prince would likely be drawn into conversation and forget the entire plan until it was too late!  So long as he wasn’t actively trying to make an ass of himself, she knew that the two unicorns would hit it off perfectly.

The sheer genius of the plan made Twilight want to throw back her head and cackle with glee.  Thankfully, she had a good deal more control than Blueblood, and chose to loose her fiendish laugh internally so as not to appear unhinged.

The remainder of their walk was done in silence, both of them mentally preparing for the challenge that lay ahead.

At last they arrived at the castle, and Twilight came to a stop before placing Spike on the ground beside her.

“What’s wrong, Twi?  Why’d we stop,” he asked.

“Well, I don’t think it would look proper for everypony to see you riding me inside,” she said, offering her foreleg.  “Care to escort me instead?”

Cheeks tinting pink, he quickly hid his arms behind his back.  “Bu… but… isn’t that something that ponies on dates do?”

She smirked, fully expecting him to ask that.  “Well, yes.  You don’t want the whole Gala to know you’re here by yourself, do you?  An unattached prince is quite the catch, you know.  What if mares begin stalking you left and right and you never even have the chance to meet with Rarity?”

That one hypothetical was all it took.  Stepping closer, Spike twined his arm with hers.  She leaned against him, shoulder to shoulder, and he shifted his weight to better support her while walking on only three hooves.

“Ready for the best night ever,” she whispered, and he shivered a bit from her breath on his ear.

“You know it.”

They walked forwards claw in hoof.  The dragon, standing proud and dignified.  The mare, beautiful yet demure.  The assembled guests watched in fascination while servants and guards chuckled into their hooves, pleased, though not at all surprised.

Celestia waited ahead, her smile already brightening at the sight of them.  Together, the prince and the protégé continued down the aisle to meet her.

> 3. A Simple Request
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Apologies for the brevity of this chapter. I know it's a good deal shorter than usual, but I've had very little time to write and wanted to get something uploaded, so Twilight's section will be in two parts.


Love is an ideal thing,
marriage a real thing;
a confusion of the real with the ideal
never goes unpunished.

-Goethe



3. A Simple Request

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Despite the familiar surroundings and the reassuring weight of Spike’s arm around her foreleg, Twilight couldn’t help but feel a sense of nervous adrenaline.  This was it.  The moment of truth.  They stepped to the back of the line and waited for their cue to step forward.

On either side, two unicorn guards brought a horn to their lips and played a short fanfare.  Giving them a quick glance, the herald cleared his throat.  “Presenting his royal highness, Prince Spike, and her ladyship, Twilight Sparkle of Ponyville!”

Twilight couldn’t help but grimace.  The last thing she wanted right now was to be the center of attention.

Looking appropriately star-struck, the line of nobility parted like a curtain, each pony giving a respectful bow and gesturing for them to proceed ahead.  It figured; the one time she’d prefer to be stuck waiting in line and they were cutting straight to the front.  She considered politely refusing, but she doubted she’d be able to say anything more than a nervous squeak.

Her mouth had gone dry, heart thudding rapidly in her chest.  As they progressed slowly through the line, she tried to review each of the arguments she would present, and think of how to address any potential objections.  She tried to take comfort in Celestia’s expectant smile, tried to believe that it would be just like any other meeting with the alicorn.

Except that it wasn’t.  There was the teensy tiny little difference that this time she wouldn’t be speaking to Celestia as a student to her mentor.  Or even as a subject to her princess.

Nope.  This time she’d be speaking to her as mother to the child she wished to court.  And she had no idea what to expect.  Would Celestia chastise her for making such a brazen request?  Would she consider Twilight unworthy of Spike?  Would she fly into an irrational motherly rage?

Sadly, that last one actually seemed like a valid possibility.  Twilight clearly remembered what happened the last time she and Celestia spoke about amorous matters that involved Spike.  Only this time it wouldn’t be Cadence that would be at ground zero when Hurricane Celestia made landfall.

Twilight gulped nervously, wondering just HOW Celestia dealt with unwanted suitors.  What if it was like the time Big Macintosh had chased one of Applejack’s coltfriends away from the farm?  She could still remember the furious stallion charging after them, curses spewing from his lips as Granny Smith rode him sidesaddle, firing her twelve gauge in all directions.  Of course Celestia wouldn’t have to resort to anything as trivial as a firearm.  Oh no, Twilight would probably just find herself flash-fried in a hellish beam of alicorn rage-magic.

By the time they reached the stairs, Twilight’s anxiety had reached a fevered pitch, her usual pre-test jitters increased to an exponential degree.  But before she had time to further review, rehearse or revise her plans, they had ascended the last step, and were both looking up at the smiling face of a goddess.

“Well, it certainly is a relief to see you both,” Celestia said.  “I was rather worried when your friends arrived without you.”

She gave the pair a mischievous smirk.  “Not that I would be surprised.  You’ve always shared quite the aversion to any sort of formal festivity.”

It might have been meant in jest, but that comment sent warning bells ringing through Twilight’s nerve-wracked brain.  After all, their tardiness could be seen as proof of irresponsibility, even callousness.  That in turn could lead to Celestia viewing her upcoming request in an unfavorable light, leading inevitably towards failure.

Twilight bowed quickly, almost pulling Spike down with her.  “Please forgive us, your highness.  It was all my fault.  I wanted to stop and visit my family before we arrived and-”

Celestia waved off the apology.  “It is perfectly fine.  As if I would fault you for such an act.”  Turning to Spike, she gave an expectant smirk.  “On the contrary, I wholeheartedly support the idea of children visiting their parents when returning home.”

Recognizing his mother’s rather unsubtle suggestion, Spike quickly released Twilight’s foreleg and ran forward, allowing himself to be swept up into a hug.

“Hi mom,” he mumbled into her fur.  “I missed you.”

“I missed you as well, son.”  Celestia leaned down and nuzzled his spines.  “Have you enjoyed your time back in Canterlot?”

Spike nodded.  “Yeah, it’s been awesome!  I got to drive the coach on the way here, and we talked to Cadence and Shining Armour, and everypony was happy to see me when we were walking up to the castle…”

Relieved to see that she’d overreacted, Twilight remained back and watched them converse.  No matter how often she observed it, the change was truly striking when they were together.  All the practiced civility and restraint was put aside in favor of simple, familial affection.  There was a distinct softness in Celestia’s eyes, and she seemed to exude an aura of peace.  And Spike, he seemed so content and trusting, as though he could remain in his mother’s embrace forever.

She only hoped that she could make him that happy.

Celestia pulled out of the embrace and gave Spike one last nuzzle.  “Now then, much as Twilight and I would love to keep you all to ourselves, I daresay you would find it rather dull standing here all night.  So why not head inside and enjoy yourself?

With a happy nod, Spike quickly gave them each a hug (in Twilight’s opinion, hers didn’t last nearly long enough) and scampered down the hall.

“Just be sure not to get your clothes dirty,” Celestia called after him.

He looked back over his shoulder.  “Okay, mom!”

“And don’t eat too many sweets,” Twilight added.

“Fine, Twilight.”

“Oh, wait!”  Celestia quickly snared Spike with her magic and held him in place.  “Also, don’t forget to be polite and actually make conversation if any ponies speak to you.  I expect you to comport yourself properly.”

Spike groaned and tried to break free of the spell.  “Alright MOTHER!  Can I go now?”

Satisfied, the alicorn lowered him back to the floor.  But before he could escape, Twilight couldn’t resist a parting shot.

“And don’t forget to wash your claws before you eat…”

“Or to close your mouth when you chew,” Celestia added with a grin.

“And eat everything on your plate!”

“Or to keep your napkin in your lap.”

“Ugh!  Just what I need, getting nagged in stereo.”  Sticking his tongue out at them, Spike turned tail and raced down the hall.

Laughing, Celestia waved until he vanished from sight, then looked back to Twilight.

“And that leaves just you and I, Twilight,” she said.  “It is so lovely to have my star student back home.”

Having the alicorn’s attention focused back on her caused a rapid resurgence of Twilight’s anxiety.  And this time she didn’t have Spike to calm her down.

“I’m so excited to be here.  We have so much to catch up on,” Twilight said, instantly regretting how rushed and anxious her voice sounded.

Thankfully, Celestia either failed to notice or chose not to comment.  Instead, she closed her eyes and offered a warm smile.  “Well, I want you right by my side the entire evening, so we’ll have plenty of time together.”

Twilight rushed to Celestia’s side, relieved that she no longer had to face her straight-on.  At least this way, she’d have the chance to get her thoughts back in order.

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They remained there, side by side, as the evening deepened into night.  Pony after pony ascended the staircase, and they greeted each in turn.  It was a simple, comfortable routine, and it did wonders in easing Twilight’s mind.  They spoke in quick, staccato bursts as each guest filed past.  Celestia regaled her with tales of all that she’d missed in Canterlot: Luna re-adjusting to the world, the antics of Cadence and her brother, and all the courtly gossip that had occurred in her absence.  In return, Twilight recounted some of the many adventures she had shared with her new friends.  There was only so much one could say in a friendship report, and Celestia was eager to hear the details.

The longer they spoke, the more Twilight found her resolve slipping.  It was the same fear of rejection that always stilled her tongue around Spike.  That horrible chance that Celestia would refuse, turn down her request.  And if that happened, Spike might forever be out of her reach.  In the face of such a possibility, uncertainty almost seemed better.

Perhaps, a hopeful part of her mind reasoned. Perhaps you could just wait and observe.  Spike’s crush on Rarity could still fade over time, right?  Then you’d have a chance to confess, the way you always should have done.

She wanted so badly to believe that, but her logical side was quick to intrude.  Come on, you know better than that.  This subterfuge might not be ideal, but it's damn sure necessary.  Waiting, worrying, hoping.  That's exactly what landed you in this predicament to begin with.  Now things are spiraling out of your control and everything's about to go straight to hell. You NEED to regain control of the situation.  You have to go through with this before you lose Spike forever.

But who's to say you'll lose him?  What if… if you just sat down with him for an honest, open talk?  No more subtly trying to hint at your feelings, no more pointing out Rarity’s lack of interest.  You could just say that you love him, that you want to make him happy and all you need is the chance.  If he knew about you feelings, maybe he would return them?

Her logical side, however, immediately countered.  That is an astonishingly STUPID idea.  Right now Spike has eyes only for Rarity.  No matter what you do, no matter how you feel, it won't register effectively!  He might just dismiss you outright, or ignore you completely.  You know how focused and lovely-dovey he gets around her!  Can you really afford to take that risk?

No, she decided.  All the facts and common sense supported this plan.  Spike needed time to get past that crush, and this was the only sure way of obtaining that time.

Trying to steady her resolve, Twilight refocused on the conversation and waited for an opportune moment.  She didn’t have to wait long.

“I’m glad that you and Spike have adjusted so well to life in Ponyville,” Celestia said.  “Although I knew it would be challenging to adjust, I could think of no better place for you to continue your studies.  The open spaces, the small town atmosphere, the familiarity and friendliness of its citizens…”

Twilight realized that this might be just the opportunity she’d been waiting for.  If her guardianship over Spike was at the forefront of Celestia’s mind, than the princess might be inclined to view her request more favorably.

“Well, it was pretty hard at first.  But I do think of it as home now,” Twilight admitted.  She avoided mentioning just how much she preferred Ponyville over Canterlot.  How their neighbors were genuinely friendly, unlike the Canterlot nobles who constantly fawned over her and Spike to try and curry their favor.  How they could be themselves, with no fame or adulation to complicate things.

Of course, it hadn’t all been smooth sailing…

“When I found out it was going to be permanent, I was actually more concerned for Spike,” she continued.  “It was a big change moving into a completely new home and unfamiliar town, but unlike me, he’d never lived away from his parents before.  He was so homesick at first...”

Celestia’s smile faltered.  “He was indeed.  I clearly remember the nights I spent sleeping with him on your sofa, rocking him to sleep as he hung on for dear life.”

Twilight nodded.  She’d hated those moments, when Spike had been so distraught that nothing she did would help.  She’d felt so helpless, holding him as he sobbed, watching the clock and urging Celestia to hurry.

“Those nights, I always half-expected you to take him back with you.  I know it must have been terribly difficult, you always hated being apart from him.”

Celestia looked away.  It was obvious that the separation was still difficult at times.  “Yes,” she finally said.  “It was one of the hardest decisions I had ever been forced to make, but I knew that Luna would need a great deal of time and help acclimating to the present day.  I would have been unable to adequately care for him while still supporting my sister.  Such a thing would be unfair to them both, and I could not bear for either to suffer due to my neglect.”

She sighed heavily, and Twilight could see the faintest hint of tears in her eyes.  Yet her smile had returned, warm and genuine.  “Which is why I allowed him to remain.  As difficult as it was to let him go, I knew that separating you from him would be just as painful.  Living away from home and away from me might be difficult, but so long as he had you, he would be happy.”

“You really think so,” Twilight interrupted.  “That he’s happy with me?  Living with me, that is?”

Her excitement snapped the alicorn out of her funk, and Celestia giggled.  “Oh, Twilight.  I do not have to THINK it.  I know he is happy.”

Twilight couldn’t help but feel a rush of pride.  “Really?!”

“Of course.  In just about every one of his personal letters I see something about ‘Twilight this or Twilight that or Twilight said this or Twilight’s so awesome,’” the alicorn trailed off with another chuckle as Twilight’s face lit up in a blush.  “Rest assured my faithful student.  I cannot think of anywhere else in the world where Spike would rather be.”

Twilight felt lighter than air.  Celestia seemed to fully support her objective, every one of the alicorn’s words reinforcing her conviction until it was ironclad.  Emboldened by her mentor’s praise, Twilight decided that it was time.

“Thank you, princess.  You don’t know how much that means to me.”  Raising her chin, Twilight took in a long, slow breath.  “After all, I only want what’s best for him.”

“I know you do, Twilight.  There was never a doubt in my mind.”

“And you trust me to take care of him, don’t you,” she pressed.

Celestia paused at that, and the two fell into silence.  The line of ponies began to bunch up on the stairs, and soon an entire crowd was milling around them.  Nosy types that they were, Twilight could tell they were all listening closely.

Celestia paid them no mind, however, and simply looked down at her, lips twitching upwards in amusement.  “I must say Twilight, I am quite surprised by these questions.  You never struck me as the type of mare who would fish for compliments.”

Celestia dipped her head lower, and the nearby guests all leaned in expectantly.  “Or maybe,” she continued.  “You are trying to steer our conversation in one particular direction.  One involving you and Spike, hmm?”

Twilight could only nod sheepishly, wishing that she possessed the courage to have just said it from the start.

“I thought so,” Celestia said.  She pursed her lips, obviously thinking back to Twilight’s words and behavior throughout the night.  “It would have to be of great importance for you to seek a personal audience with me before disclosing it.  No doubt it is also a matter you fear might be poorly received, which would explain your late arrival and reticence in speaking.  And unless I am mistaken, it seems to greatly hinge upon my own feelings, since you asked those questions purely to gauge my opinion about your treatment of Spike.”

Well, that was that.  If Twilight had any further reservations, they were now irrelevant.  With Celestia having unraveled her motives and waiting for a response, there was nothing left to do but take the plunge.

Twilight raised herself up, shoulders squared, gaze unwavering, voice steady.  “You are correct as always, princess.  This matter has weighed heavily upon me for some time, but I knew that it could not be voiced through something as limited and impersonal as a letter.  Impertinent though it be, I have a request to make of you.  I know that it is far beyond my station to ask such a thing, but I feel in my heart that it must be done.”

Celestia was taken aback by her formal tone and deferential words.  No surprise there.  While Twilight had always acted polite and respectful towards her mentor, this was the first time she had ever stressed their respective positions as commoner and monarch.  The assembled guests whispered amongst themselves, each wondering just what kind of request might be forthcoming.  As each pony whispered to the one behind them, the theories grew more and more outlandish.  

Even as the princess composed herself, Twilight could already hear the gossip as it progressed down the line.  Their curiosity peaked, the nobles were eagerly pushing and shoving to move closer.  In hindsight, it might’ve been a poor idea to discuss this with an audience.

“Twilight, it is clear to me that whatever troubles you must be of the greatest significance,” Celestia said.  “But please, there is no need to act in such a way.  You are not some scorned and unknown peasant, groveling at the hooves of an indifferent mistress.”

Celestia reached out and gently rested a hoof on Twilight’s stiff shoulder.  “You are my student, my friend, the subject whom I love best.  Simply ask of me what you will, and I will do all in my power to grant it.”

Despite the soothing words, the unicorn forced her expression to stay neutral.  She couldn’t risk losing her composure.

“Thank you, Princess Celestia.  What I ask is no easy thing, because it will change many things for us both.  I know it will involve a great deal of commitment and sacrifice, and is not to be made lightly.  And I know you’ll think it sudden and reckless, but I promise that I’ve put a lot of thought into it and…”  Damn it, she was rambling again.  She needed to just spit it out!  “Can I just start from the beginning?”

Celestia nodded, and the guests all drew closer in anticipation.

“Since moving to Ponyville, I’ve never felt so happy.  My friends have shown me that there is so much more to life than just what I can read or research.  I’ve learned to express myself more openly, to trust more completely.  I’ve gotten used to relying on others and knowing when to lend my own help.  But as magical as friendship can be, it’s not enough.  Instead, I have found something else that I wish to experience.”

This was it.  Mentally praying for the best, Twilight closed her eyes and just let it out.

“What I desire is dearer than knowledge, deeper than friendship.  It is love; not platonic of familial, but romantic love.  True love.  A mate and partner I can share my heart and my life with.”

Everypony’s eyes were as wide as saucers, none more so than Celestia’s.  The princess looked ready to speak, but Twilight beseechingly raised a hoof.

“I know what you’re about to say.  That I’m being impulsive.  That such a thing cannot be done in haste, that finding a mate is not so easy as just seeking out and grabbing one off the street.  But you see, I’ve already found one.  A pony that has long since claimed my heart.  Only… he’s not a pony at all.”

Twilight smiled.  After bottling this up for so long, it felt so relieving to actually say those words.  She opened her eyes and looked up, meeting Celestia’s startled gaze.  Even though they were in the midst of the largest and liveliest celebration of the year, the entire room was deathly silent but for the voice of one unicorn as she made her request.

“That is why I ask for your permission to enter into an immediate and royally official engagement with Spike."