MLP Loops 185
185.1 (LadyStina2)
The Great and Powerful Trixie was busy pulling her traveling caravan slash stage behind her on the road to Hoofington. Afterwards her Grand Equestrian Tour would take her to the small town of Ponyville. She always enjoyed performing for small towns. They were so easily impressed, and it was usually easy to draw a heckler up on the stage with her. The audiences usually did her work for her by egging them on once she called them out!
She was so lost in her thoughts and the monotony of hauling her traveling caravan slash stage behind her that she failed to notice the wind picking up in a localized area just ahead of her. So the sudden flash of light and the kneeling unicorn took her completely by surprise. She yelped and reared up in shock.
The purple unicorn was wearing a black body suit, an eyepatch, and a white bandage around her wild manedo that was sticking straight up. The unicorn turned towards her slowly and asked solemnly, “Are you the Great and Powerful Trixie?”
Trixie blinked a couple times as she processed what was happening before straightening and announcing, “Yes. It is I, The Great and Powerful Trixie!” she cast her firework spell for effect. Once the newly arrived unicorn was suitably impressed, Trixie told her, “Trixie does not commonly speak with fans, but since Trixie is traveling, she will make an exception.”
“Great. Because I’m from the future, and we have calculated that I should have been sent back at least two weeks before the event that dooms all of Equestria. And only The Great and Powerful Trixie can prevent the terrible future that’s otherwise in store for us all!” the unicorn exclaimed.
“What? Really?” The Great and Confused Trixie asked. “What can I do?”
The unicorn held a hoof out and said, “First, I’m from that horrible, horrible future. When you agree to do what you must, then I would have no reason to come back in time. I’ll know when your resolve is strong, because I will cease to exist as the future timeline adjusts itself to the new and better future. So I ask you, oh Great and Powerful Trixie, do you have the will to do what needs to be done?”
The Awed and Inspired Trixie was momentarily speechless at the unicorn’s proclamation but was able to answer, “Yes! Trixie will do it! Tell Trixie the task, unicorn from the future!”
The unicorn looked solemnly at Trixie, pointed a hoof at her and pronounced, “So be it! Your task is thus. You. Must. Not. Perform in Ponyville!” There was an extended silence as the unicorns looked at each other.
Finally the Confused and Frustrated Trixie exclaimed, “What? That’s it? The fate of Equestria depends upon me not performing in Ponyville? What kind of sense does that make?”
The other unicorn said in a much more relaxed tone of voice, “No, no. We’ve totally pinned down the one event that started the chain of events that doomed Equestria was your performance in Ponyville.”
“That is ridiculous! A performance by the Great and Powerful Trixie is not going to doom all of Equestria!” Trixie proclaimed.
The strange unicorn shrugged and said, “Well, that’s why they sent me back a couple weeks early. So I’d have time to convince you otherwise. And it’s a one-way spell, so I’ll just hang out with you. The door’s in the back, right?” she pointed to the back of Trixie’s traveling caravan slash stage.
“Yes. No! What are you doing?” Trixie replied in confusion.
The other unicorn was looking around and said, “So this is what Equestria looked like before the Fall, huh? I was so busy trying to complete my mission that I didn’t really take the time to look.” She gasped excitedly and asked, “Is that a tree?! Omigosh! I’ve only seen the tame ones in pictures!”
“Tame ones? What are you talking about? Who are you, anyway?” The Still Confused and Frustrated Trixie asked.
The unicorn seemed to rein in her apparent curiosity and looked back at Trixie before casually saying, “Oh. Well in the future, the only trees still around will grab anypony walking by and devour them. What little land hasn’t been torn apart by war has been burned repeatedly to keep the trees from rising up again. Oh, and to keep the zombies down of course.”
“Zombies?” The Skeptical and Disbelieving Trixie asked flatly.
“Oh, you don’t have zombies here and now? Thank birch,” the strange unicorn replied. “Say, do you have any books in your wagon? I haven’t seen a book since I was a filly hunkered down in our family’s underground bunker. My grandmother was apparently a collector.”
“Um, yes. Yes, Trixie does have some books inside. But Trixie is not going to just let you in. You still have not told her your name,” Trixie protested.
“My name is not important,” the mystery unicorn replied. “Once you have accepted your mission, I will cease to exist and the world will be a better place!” She paused a moment as what she said ran through her head again and said, “Wait. That sounded bad. Totally not what I meant to say.”
“So what exactly is Trixie supposed to call you? She can’t just say ‘hey you’.”
The unicorn smiled slyly and said, “Well, when you decide that you’re not going to perform in Ponyville, I’ll just vanish in a puff of logic and you won’t have to worry about it! So get with the decision-making already!” The unicorn caught sight of a river in the distance and said, “Wow, is that water? I’ve never seen it so blue before. What’s wrong with it?”
Trixie threw her hooves up and exclaimed, “Nothing is wrong with it, you daft unicorn! That’s what water is supposed to look like.”
The unicorn looked at Trixie then back at the river and said, “Huh. In the future we don’t really have a lot of water on the ground. We’re still trying to starve out the trees, you see. What’s on the ground is this greenish, brownish color. It’s actually hard to describe. But part of that is because of the whole eternal night thing. It makes all the colors really washed out. This is nice. It’d be a real shame if it’s all washed away because of one little performance in Ponyville.”
Trixie stopped hauling her traveling caravan slash stage and stared at the strange unicorn. She unhitched herself and approached her unwanted guest. “Let Trixie see if she understands. If she performs in Ponyville, Equestria will descend into a war, trees will start devouring ponies, the undead will rise, water is scarce, fields and forests are burned, and Eternal Night will descend. Is Trixie missing anything?”
The strange unicorn lifted a hoof to her chin and thought for a moment before asking, “Did I mention the collapse of civilization as you know it? We’ve pretty much descended to small roving herds. And do you have plunder vines? I don’t remember when exactly they popped up in history.”
Trixie sighed and said flatly, “You’re aware that the Great and Powerful Trixie doesn’t believe a word you say.”
The unicorn shrugged, “That’s why I have a couple weeks to convince you. I’ll just hop in your wagon and read your books. Oooh! Do you have maps? It’ll be neat seeing the differences from when the sea level was higher. Let me know when we’re stopping for our daily meal!” The unicorn walked to the door of the traveling caravan slash stage, used her magic to unlock the door and entered Trixie’s portable home.
Trixie sighed angrily and marched to the door of her traveling caravan slash stage. She threw open the door and said angrily, “Now see here!... What is it now?...” she finished warily. The unicorn was prodding the rosemary and basil sprigs Trixie had previously hung up to dry.
“What are these?” the unicorn asked distractedly.
“Herbs. Now the Great and Powerful Trixie insists that you leave this instant!”
“What a strange word…” the unicorn muttered. She turned, tilted her head and asked, “What are… eeerrrbbbss?”
Trixie moaned and facehoofed before muttering to herself, “Trixie does not have time for this…” She looked at the purple unicorn and told her, “They are spices for flavoring food. And you are clearly insane. Do you have family I can drop you off with? A white jacket with straps perhaps? Or maybe there’s a ‘home’ nearby I can bring you back to?”
The unicorn was stunned for some reason and asked in an awed voice, “You are affluent enough to be able to flavor your food?” She suddenly kneeled and pleaded, “Please forgive me oh Great and Powerful Trixie! The histories never said you were royalty, Your Highness!”
“Get up, get up!” Trixie commanded nervously while glancing around. It’d be just her luck if a Royal Guard was outside and accused her of treason. “I’m not royalty, I’m not even from a noble family! I’m just a traveling showmare!” She was so shocked she didn’t realize that she had dropped her typical use of third person.
“Truly?” the strange unicorn asked as she looked up from her kneeling position.
“Yes, yes! No social status here! Now get up!” Trixie begged and pulled the insane unicorn to her hooves. She relaxed a little when her uninvited guest stood back up. Trixie looked back at the other unicorn sternly and said, “You need to leave. Where’s your family? Trixie will bring you back.”
The unicorn brought her hoof up to her chin in thought before answering, “Let’s see… the year is… so that would mean…” She nodded decisively before saying, “My grandmother should be moving from Canterlot to Ponyville this year. Tell me, has Princess Luna been returned to the throne?”
Trixie gave her a flat look and said, “Yes. You are insane. Who is this Princess Luna supposed to be?”
“Then Grandma Sparkle should still be in Canterlot, or has just moved and you haven’t heard of Princess Luna yet,” she said. “But! My mission is to keep you from performing in Ponyville. So, I’d like to stay away from there. Also, there’s that whole running into your ancestors thing. I don’t want to keep her from meeting her friends, my grandfather, or anything disastrous like that.”
“You know I don’t believe you,” Trixie told her flatly.
“I can prove it!” the insane unicorn said excitedly. “I’ve researched this time period extensively and know what major events will happen. If I can accurately ‘predict’ something, will you believe me then?”
Trixie rolled her eyes and said, “Fine. Merely because at times Trixie gets lonely on the road. She can put up with you for a few days until one of these ‘predictions’ fails to pan out. Then she will leave you in Hoofington and travel on to Ponyville!”
The unicorn smiled and said, “And if one of my predictions happens as… well… predicted… Then you’ll agree to not perform in Ponyville and then, assuming you’re true to your word, I will vanish in a puff of logic and you won’t have to worry about me anymore.”
“Fine, tell Trixie your prediction,” Trixie agreed to the terms.
The unicorn started speaking like she was reciting a tired old story, “Ok, so on the longest day of the thousandth year, the stars will align and free the Mare in the Moon, Nightmare Moon. Six ponies will recover the Elements of Harmony and use those to reform Nightmare Moon only to discover that she is actually Princess Luna, Princess Celestia’s sister that she had banished to the moon one thousand years ago.”
Trixie blinked a couple times and replied, “That is quite the story. And incredibly easy to disprove.”
The unicorn smirked and replied, “Or to prove. When it happens, the Mare in the Moon will disappear. And the monarchy suddenly becoming a diarchy is sure to make all sorts of news.”
“Very well. You may accompany the Great and Powerful Trixie until we part ways in Hoofington,” Trixie conceded.
“Or soo~ner,” the unicorn sing-songed. Trixie left the inside of her traveling caravan slash stage while muttering about crazy unicorns. She hitched herself back up and once again started traveling to Hoofington.
As usual when Trixie was on the road, she woke up before Celestia typically raised the sun. She always liked to be moving during sunrise. Not to mention it put her traveling in the coolest part of the day. Trixie and the insane unicorn, who still wouldn’t reveal her name, were packing up the wagon after eating the simple meal Trixie prepared. The unicorn kept glancing up at the moon. It was enough for Trixie ask, “What are you looking at?”
She nodded upwards and said, “The Mare in the Moon. I’ve heard of it, but I’ve never seen it.”
“Nice try, crazy,” Trixie responded which only made the mare grin at her.
The mare gasped and pointed upwards suddenly and exclaimed, “Omigosh! It’s happening! Trixie, look!”
Trixie looked at what the crazy unicorn was pointing at and saw the moon. And four stars moved behind it which caused the moon to flash and suddenly the moon was a solid white. Trixie gaped, before pointing and looking back over at the maybe-she’s-not-crazy-after-all mare. She got a solemn nod in return.
Trixie kept watching the moon, but the image that had always been on the moon never reappeared. After a minute, she gulped and nervously looked over at the unicorn and asked, “My performance in Ponyville will somehow lead to a war, cannibalistic trees, plunder vines, undead rising, burning of forests and fields, water shortages, Eternal Night, the ocean levels dropping, the loss of books, the loss of food flavorings, and the collapse of civilization? Anything else?”
The mare got a far-away look in her eye and replied, “Not that I’m willing to share. I’m kinda saving the worst of those for the day before you enter Ponyville as sort of a last-ditch attempt to convince you not to go through with it.”
“So all of that is the least terrible things that happen?!” The Shocked and Appalled Trixie exclaimed.
The mare shrugged and replied tiredly, “Trixie. It’s all bad. That’s why we decided to send one of us to the past to try to change things. We understand the butterfly effect and that this gambit may not play out like we suspect.” She got a little more excitable and pleaded, “But, Trixie. Anything is better than the future I come from. Pony-kind is on the verge of extinction unless something unforeseen changes. And you have the power to prevent it all from happening. By just not doing something!”
“Fine! Fine. You win,” Trixie conceded. “The Great and Powerful Trixie will forego her planned performance in Ponyville.”
The mare smiled brightly and said, “Thank you, oh Great and Powerful Trixie! You are a true hero!” The apparently-not-so-crazy mare suddenly faded from view. Much like she said she would.
Trixie just sighed and put a hoof to her face. “Why is my life so weird…” she muttered to herself before looking around and asking the air, “And why is it still dark?”
Twilight Sparkle teleported into her library and shouted, “Time!” Spike hit a huge red button on a timer they had set up before Twilight had left as she began removing her time travel outfit.
“Twenty hours. I’m impressed, darling. It took Applejack a week and a half to convince Trixie not to come to Ponyville,” Rarity replied while examining the graph Spike was updating.
“I still say it should have been my turn,” Rainbow Dash complained. "You’re always Awake, you could have pranked her at any time.”
Applejack chimed in, “Fair’s fair, RD. We all drew numbers and Twilight had the second turn. Can’t believe she beat me so bad, though…”
“Besides, going later lets you get your plan together,” Spike chimed in.
“So, what did you tell her?” Pinkie asked eagerly.
“Nuh-uh-uh, dear,” Rarity chided. “If she tells, that’ll give the rest of us a chance to steal her story.” Rarity eyed the outfit that Twilight had just removed and said, “But I think I can figure out what her story’s framing device entailed.”
Rainbow rolled her eyes and replied, “Like it’s that hard. She always uses that same outfit when she wants to play time traveler.”
“I do not!” Twilight protested while rapidly blinking the eye that had been under the eyepatch. Everyone gave her a look and a raised eyebrow. When she noticed, she blushed and said sheepishly, “But it happens more times than not. It’s a good time traveler outfit! Tell them Rarity,” she commanded.
“Oh no, dear. Science fiction has a completely different set of fashion rules, so I’m afraid I’ll have to turn the opinion over to Pinkie,” Rarity declined to get involved.
Pinkie got a serious look on her face and analyzed everything for a moment, “Hmm… WElllll… There are different looks. I prefer a puffy orange vest myself, or a really long, striped scarf is always good. But she definitely had the wild hair down… Ok, decision made! For coming from a post-apocalyptic future, that is the type of fashion one would wear.”
“Thank you, Pinkie. See Dash?” Twilight asked her friend.
“You’re going to trust Miss-Cupcake-Dress over there?” Dash asked.
“Hey! That was baseline!” Pinkie protested. “You can’t use that!”
Dash smirked, “And so is Twilight’s time travel outfit.”
As the girls cheerfully argued with each other, Spike got a thoughtful look on his face and asked the room, “Hey. Do you think Trixie had a plan when she told us to make a contest about how long it would take each of us to talk her unawake self out of performing here?”
185.2 (Vinylshadow)
Twilight checked her watch. "Huh..."
Spike tilted his head. "What's up, Twi?"
"The letter from the Crystal Empire about the Crystalling hasn't arrived."
Before Spike could answer, a loud piercing shriek of glee tore through Ponyville.
"I'M INVITED TO THE CRYSTAL EMPIRE?! I'M IMPORTANT!"
"And this is why we don't rely on the wind to carry delicate messages of importance in Equestria," Spike remarked while Twilight bit back a laugh of her own.
"The least we could do is take them along with us," Twilight replied, kneeling down so Spike could clamber on to her back. "Any idea where the letter went?"
"Sounded like one of the Flower Ponies," Spike said, pointing out the part of town they lived in.
"Splendid, we can have them bring back some crystal flowers for Ponyville," Twilight said happily.
"We already have a gaudy crystal castle. Do we really need to remake Ponyville into a Mini-Empire?"
Twilight laughed nervously. "Well...it wouldn't be the first time..."
"You make a fine Empress," Spike said soothingly, patting her withers. "And sometimes it's fun to indulge in petty tyranny to let off some steam after a rough Loop or twelve."
"Thanks, Spike. That makes me feel a lot better."
185.3 (Keywii_Cookies55)
"Sorry dear, I can't say I've noticed anything unusual about Twilight." Rarity honestly confessed as Starlight Glimmer jotted down notes using her magic.
"Nothing? Nothing at all? Maybe she predicted something in passing?" Starlight was getting a bit desperate for answers, but she was still a few ponies away from begging.
"Really Starlight, you need to let this go, all this stress can't be good for you." Rarity said with a hint of concern in her voice, though Starlight could tell it had less to do with health, and more to do with possibly relapsing into being evil. Before Rarity could say anything else, Starlight thanked her for speaking with her and walked away.
She was running out of leads, she realized, and she was going to have to ask Twilight directly soon.
"But how much could Twilight be hiding?" Starlight contemplated as the carousel boutique slowly faded into the background of downtown Ponyville "If she's really at the center of some sort of time travel conspiracy, she has to be capable of dangerous things."
It had been bugging Starlight for some time now, Twilight Sparkle had both demonstrated high level alicorn magic, as well as staved off any sort of disaster Flurry Heart almost caused. Twilight also had a look of deep experience in her eyes anytime she and Starlight talked.
Nothing bad seemed to happen, and if anything, Twilight PREVENTED bad things from happening. But Starlight knew better, she knew how to cover up ill intentions with pleasant manipulation. If anything, she knew it almost too well for her liking.
"That's all behind me now," She reassured herself, "but I might not be done with having to see it happen."
As Starlight approached the castle she shook her head, "I don't know what exactly you're planning, Twilight, but if nobody is going to help me, I'm going to have to figure it out myself."
185.4 (Masterweaver)
"...Hey Gilda?"
"Yeah Dash?"
"Awkward question I've been meaning to ask you for a while now."
"Shoot."
"Are you gay?"
"...Hmm. Good question, actually. Not entirely sure."
"Well, it is a scale, so... percent gayness."
"See, the thing is, I'm like... when it comes to ponies, I'm not usually attracted to stallions – except for Mac–"
"Yeah, Mac's a fair exception."
"–but when it comes to griffons, I think... I swing both ways? I dunno."
"Gotcha. So, obvious next question: you attracted to me?"
"Enh. On and off."
"What?"
"I mean, yeah, you're hot and all, but you're also my friend, and... look, what brought this on?"
"Well... okay, this is going to sound stupid."
"Nothing new there."
"Harsh. So... recent expansion. Fluttershy's family solidified, and.... well, she has a brother–"
"You crushing on the guy?"
"AS IF. Zeph's a layabout with a five-o-clock shadow and an ego that he can't back up. Maybe some ponies might like him, but – you know me, I'm the kind of pony that likes deeds more than words. He's not even... I'm not saying he's horrible and irredeemable, but just... no. Just no."
"Oh. So...?"
"He flirts at me all the time."
"Don't you mean with?"
"No. At. I try pushing him back and... okay, this is the part that is going to sound stupid."
"Wait. Are you going for an Operation Jealousy here?"
"More like Operation I'm Taken Back Off. Which... kinda wanted to make sure you knew the whole motivation here. And, you know, didn't want to hurt you if, uh–"
"No, I can get what you're doing. I'm... a little annoyed that I'm being approached as the wingman here, but I get it."
"...This was stupid of me to ask."
"Yeah. It was."
"You know I wouldn't... if you wanted, we could–"
"Dash, stop. Look. You're... The reason I haven't ever seriously approached you before is, well, like I said, we're friends. And... like I said, the attraction is on and off. You're the element of Loyalty, you... if I were to break up with you later, I think you wouldn't take it well."
"Well, Scootaloo and Diamond Tiara had... a pretty amicable break-up."
"I... Dash, no, I don't think I can do this. I'm sorry."
"...Nah, that's fine. Still friends, though, right?"
"Yeah."
"Yeah."
"...If you like, though, I could roar in Zeph's face."
"...Hmm... that might be a good idea, actually."
185.5 (Masterweaver)
Lyra had just put down her mug and was in the middle of letting out a pleased sigh of refreshment when a white hoof slammed her head against the bar.
"OKAY, TELL ME WHAT YOU DID TO TAVI! I KNOW IT WAS YOU!"
Macintosh sighed. "Miss Scratch, might you be over-reacting–?"
"Shark father! Shark curse! Shark ghost! Every loop for the past-past fifty loops, she turns into a shark! Or at least part shark!" Vinyl threw up her hooves, letting Lyra breathe. "And I mean at first it was funny, but it comes with all these predatory instincts and I'm just too trees-damn tired to deal with it! So, miss Seapony, what did you do to Tavi?!"
"I swear," Lyra grumbled, "this is the first I've heard of this."
Vinyl blinked.
"...chlorophyll. You're telling the truth, aren't you."
"Yes."
"Which means I just assaulted you for no reason."
"Yes."
"...and you're a seapony," Vinyl groaned. "I'm doomed, aren't I?"
"I'll be a little lenient, given this was brought about by romantic stress."
185.6 (Masterweaver)
"SWEET EVERFREE RARITY!" Pinkie grinned like a maniac, pointing up. "LOOK!"
Rarity sighed. "What am I looking at, Pinkie?"
"See the sign?! THAT'S AN ELEPHANT!"
"...And?"
"AND!" Pinkie cried. "If this expansion is baseline, that means the sign is baseline, which means it's based off something that exists in baseline, which means that elephants exist in baseline!"
Rarity gave her a flat look. "...Pinkie. Cheese Sandwich had a trained hippo. Elephants are not a large leap."
185.7 (Masterweaver)
Rarity looked around the restaurants of Restaurant Row and sighed. Pinkie looked at her askance. "What's wrong, Rares?"
"I have got to have a long talk with Fluttershy. Or maybe Sleipnir."
"Why?"
Without a word, she pointed up at a sign which displayed three smirking depictions of one Zephyr Breeze.
185.8 (Masterweaver)
"It looks like you're in quite the TANGLED mess!" Mane-iac cackled. "I hope you don't mind if I tie up a few SPLIT ENDS!"
"It's loose ends!" Rarity dodged a green lock with a roll of her eyes. "Honestly, if you're going to banter, do it correctly!"
"NOPONY UNDERSTANDS MY AAAAAAAAAAAAAHT! Why it makes me positively FRAZZLED!"
"Give it up, Mane-iac!" Twilight cried. "There's no way you'll activate your doomsday device in time!"
"You're absolutely right! I can't reach it in time–but MY INTERN IS ALREADY HERE!"
Everyone gasped, looking at the doomsday switch–and Fluttershy gasped again. "ZEPHYER BREEZE?!"
"Wha–Oh, big sis! Is that you? Great look, by the way!"
"What are you doing here?!"
"Yeah, I took some extra credit with Mane-iac for my mane therapy class. She's a real visionary, totally misunderstood–"
"THIS IS AN ENCHANTED COMIC BOOK!" Fluttershy protested. "THIS MAKES NO SENSE!"
185.9 (Masterweaver)
"...Twilight?"
"Yes Starlight?"
"First of all, I've figured out you're in a time loop and that you're not the only one. Okay?"
"...you know, that keeps happening for some reason. Could you tell me how you–?"
"Later. I just want to know... is it... oh Celestia, this is embarrassing..."
"It's okay, Starlight. No matter what it is, I've probably been in far more embarrassing situations."
"...is it normal for a pony to love a rabbit?"
"..."
"Twilight?"
"In this scenario, are you the pony?"
"...yes."
"And is Angel Bunny the rabbit?"
"...yes. So it's, uh, normal?"
"I... haven't actually run the numbers on your personal romantic trends, but... it does happen. Just... take it slow, okay?"
185.10 (Masterweaver)
"...Okay, not what I had planned."
Nyx rubbed her neck as she watched the castle from afar. Granted, she had awoken only after being separated from Luna this Loop, so she hadn't had a chance to defend herself, but Celestia's reaction was still unexpectedly harsh. At least hooves weren't that great for strangling, although she'd have a few bruises for a while.
She let off a ping, and received no reply. "Stealth Anchor? Huh." With a shrug, she flew a little further from the castle. "Okey-doke, sitrep: everyone thinks I'm Nightmare Moon--technically accurate--and that I plan to destroy the world. Celestia's probably going to declare me a wanted criminal, maybe even kill-on-sight. I could just glamour up and take it easy..."
Nyx glanced back at the castle.
"...nah. I think I'll be the hero with bad publicity this time around. Saving ponies from monsters and criminals. Maybe showing up whenever the big baddies do to help out the Bearers... yeah, sounds like a plan!"
She sighed. "And now I'm talking to myself. Is this what Mom has to go through all the time?"
185.11 (Masterweaver)
Shining sighed, slumping his head against the bar. "Hey, Mac. You know what I want."
"Mac's not Awake, hon."
"Oh. Berry." Shining waved, his head not rising an inch. "Hey. I'm too tired to think of what Mac calls it, so can you just–"
"Yeah, it's my talent." Berry set about mixing a drink. "So, what's up?"
"...variable guard competence."
The mare tilted her head. "Run that by me?"
"Mnngh." Shining reluctantly looked up. "Baseline, the Royal Guard can't handle Nightmare Moon, or Chrysalis, or... really, any of the big ones. That's fine, they're demigods and shapeshifting armies... but for the most part, they're at least able to do the usual patrols, fight off assassinations, stuff like that. And then there are loops like this one."
Berry put a glass in front of the unicorn. "I take it they're not up to snuff."
"They're ADHD children in the bodies of adult ponies." Shining chugged the drink. "I mean – wow, that's strong – just this morning. Just this morning. I had to reprimand three different guards for pulling the 'I'm not touching you' stunt. There's a petition for a bouncy house in the barracks. And! And they, they were arguing over the best comic-book super-hero. And I don't mean geek-debates," he clarified, "I mean arguing like 'Matter-Horn's got a cooler looking costume', 'yeah but Filli-Second moves reeeeally fast!' It's an insult to comic culture, is what it is..."
He took in the bartender's amused expression.
"Look, the point is, they're just... I don't even. I'm a military commander, not a glorified babysitter!"
185.12 (Masterweaver)
TALES OF THE DARKHORSE!
"...so Sweetie Belle has decided to befriend this 'Nyx' filly that joined her class. Bless her heart!"
Twilight hummed absently.
"Twilight, dear?" Rarity nudged her. "You seem distracted."
"Oh, I'm sorry, I just... I just hope we can find the Nightmare soon – the princesses are worried about her evil plot!"
Rarity nodded. "I can certainly see why. Such a monstrous thing should not be roaming free! If I hear anything at all, I'll let you know–"
"STAMPEDE!"
Both ponies looked up at Rainbow Dash for a brief moment, before looking out to the green fields surrounding Ponyville. A massive horde of cattle were rushing toward the town; panicked cries and moos resounded through the air.
"HeEeEyYy!" Pinkie Pie giggled, vibrating by. "ThIiIiS MaAkEsSs MyYy VoOiIcE SoOoUuNnD SiIiIiLlLlLlLlYyYyY!"
"Pinkie Pie, are you crazy?!" Twilight shouted. "Run!"
"Everypony calm down!" the mayor cried, desperately trying to get the attention of her citizens. "There is no need to panic!"
"But Mayor, whatever shall we do?" Rarity pleaded.
Rainbow Dash gasped in shock. "Look there!"
The ponies all followed her pointing hoof and stared, dumbfounded, as a black filly glided over the herd of cattle. Her horn glowed, streams of starry blue mist streamlining the stampede and keeping cows from breaking off; she landed on the lead cow and, grasping her horns, wrenched them into moving away from Ponyville. Twilight and her friends could only watch in astonishment as the stampede slowed and halted some distance away.
"...Did Nightmare Moon just save the town?" Fluttershy finally asked.
"Don't be ridiculous!" Twilight managed. "Nightmare Moon is evil!"
185.13 (Masterweaver)
Time Out Tale
"...if I didn't know any better," Jorunn reluctantly admitted, "I would accuse you of being Spag in disguise."
"Thpag?"
"The flying spaghetti monster. He runs the cafeteria and break rooms in higher-dimensional Yggdrassil." The pegacorn bit into her sweet. "The higher-up Admins don't really trust him, since he's a defector from shoggoth-chan, so he's sort of on indefinite probation and not allowed to admin any loops. He's... strange, but actually pretty nice, when you get to know him."
Twist frowned. "A flying thpaghetti monthter. Really."
"Yes, really." Jorunn gave her a sly smile. "Spahg's a little out there, sure, but my uncles are a snake and a wolf, and my aunt's a half-zombie."
"Half thombie? How can anypony be half thombie?" The filly paled. "Ith thee, like, only the front half?"
"No, she's just half alive and half dead."
"...okay, Jorunn?" Twist put her hoof on the filly's shoulder. "Maybe everything you're thaying ith true–"
"It is," Cheerilee confirmed from the wall she was leaning against.
"--but, and pleathe don't take thith the wrong way... if you keep coming up with rediculouth thtorieth like thothe, ponieth might not be willing to take you very theriouthly."
Jorunn frowned, crossing her hooves. "I only speak of truths from beyond your world–"
"Yeth. Eckthactly." Twist spread her hoof. "If I can't learn about Thpahg or your cool-thounding family from anypony but you, it kinda maketh it theem like you're making thingth up for attention."
The black filly huffed, crossing her forelegs. "...I suppose I take your point." She bit into another sweet. "...you are a good baker, though."
"Thankth."
"...A very good baker," she continued. "Especially for somepony so young. You must really like learning how to make new kinds of food."
"Uh, yeah. I jutht... like to make thweeth, I guesth..."
Jorunn stared at her, raising an eyebrow.
Twist's eyes darted left and right. "...I... really like baking thweeth?"
"...yes. Yes you do. You like it a lot."
"You're not being very subtle," Cheerilee deadpanned.
Jorunn glowered at her.
"But, you know, it's a good first attempt," she allowed. "All things considered. Why don't I take you back to Twilight's?"
"...I'm taking the sweets."
"Fair enough." Cheerilee turned to Twist. "Thank you for inviting us over."
"It wath no trouble. Goodbye Jorunn!"
The filly waved as the two of them left, rolling her eyes as the black pony began muttering in her foreign tongue. True, the new student was... well, arrogant and dismissive and very rude, but... when she wasn't trying to play to a crowd, she seemed mostly decent, if a little impatient. And to be honest, she'd taken quite an interest in Twist's baking – not something that had happened often, when she'd tried to show off to all her classmates. It was really... a reminder of why she started doing this in the first place...
So deep was she in her thoughts that she almost didn't notice the flash of light on her flanks. Almost.
185.14 (Masterweaver)
"Another loop, another adventure," Twilight said, stretching as she stood up. Her eyes flicked to the open book in front of her. "Let's just check to make sure there aren't any surprises."
She flipped through the pages.
Then she frowned, flipping through them again.
"Hey! Twilight! Moondancer's hosting a party! You want to–?"
"Lemon Hearts." Twilight shoved the book at her. "I want you to open this to a random page, and tell me what you see."
The yellow unicorn blinked. "Uh... sure?" She rose an eyebrow, opening the book. "Once upon a time, in the magical land of Equestria, their were two sisters–"
"Alright. Again. New page."
"Alright..." Lemon Hearts shut the book, moved her hoof and opened it. "Once upon a time, in the magical... land of Equestria... Twilight, what is this?"
"Every page in that book is the same," Twilight explained. "Which doesn't make any sense! I mean, why would Celestia want me to read a book where every page is the same?!"
185.15 (Masterweaver)
TALES OF THE DARK HORSE!
Twilight rushed into the dark night, avoiding the screaming ponies around her. "What's going on?!" she demanded.
"We brought an Ursa into town!" proclaimed a pudgy colt proudly.
"You what!?!"
"Don't worry," droned a ganglier colt. "The Great and Powerful Trixie will vanquish it."
The blue showmare looked from them to the starbeast rampaging through the town. "I... I can't."
"What!?"
"Oh, I can't, I never have." She gave the colts a sardonic look. "No one can vanquish an Ursa Major. I just made the whole story up to make me look better."
"Made it up!?"
The starbear reared up, roaring menacingly, and the colts put aside their shock for complete and utter terror.
"CEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE!"
A black form flew out of nowhere, booping the Ursa's nose. The creature blinked in confusion as an alicorn filly landed on its snout.
"CHILD OF NIGHT AND DREAMS!" it thundered. "YOU WERE WOKEN UNFAIRLY, YET THERE IS NO REASON FOR YOUR ACTION! RETURN NOW TO YOUR MOTHER AND REST!"
The Ursa lowered to the ground, folding its ears back. "Mrrrrraa?"
"YES, I WILL HAVE TO TELL YOUR MOTHER ABOUT THIS."
"Grrrrrrm."
"WELL WHAT DID YOU EXPECT? YOU'VE CRUSHED CARTS AND TORN ROOFS APART! HONESTLY, YOU'RE LUCKY THAT TELLING YOUR MOTHER IS ALL I'M DOING!"
"RAAAAAA–Gmph!" The Ursa scabbled at the rope of stars suddenly around its muzzle.
"YOU ARE IN SERIOUS TROUBLE, YOUNG MAN! HEAD HOME, AND DON'T MAKE IT WORSE ON YOURSELF!"
"Mmmph. Rrrrrm?"
"IT'S THAT WAY. IN THE EVERFREE." The figure pointed. "YOU CAN'T MISS IT."
"Grrrrmrrrm." With slumped shoulders, the Ursa began to trot out of town.
Twilight gaped as the filly glided to the ground. She, like most of the other ponies present, was rendered mute by shock.
Trixie, however, flung herself at the dark form's hooves. "Oh noble princess! The Great and Powerful Trixie thanks you for coming to her rescue!"
"Twas not a problem, Trixie Lulamoon," the filly stated grandiosely. "I would never stand by while any of my ponies were threatened."
"Lulamoon--YOU'RE A NIGHTMARE MOON SUPPORTER!" Twilight cried, pointing at the blue mare. "THAT'S WHY SHE STOPPED THE URSA!"
Trixie blinked. "Wait, what?!"
"I suggest you run," the filly quipped. "I'm not popular around here."
"GET THEM!"
The ponies standing around moved forward, but the filly and Trixie vanished in a sudden explosion of starry smoke.
185.16 (Detective Ethan Redfield)
Lyra hovered a bow over to Bon Bon. She had a plan, and begged Twilight to follow baseline up until Matilda and Cranky's wedding. "Anything is possible when someponies know each other as well as we know each other."
The bugbear growled in the distance, causing Bon Bon to look around, confused, "What was that?"
Lyra feigned disinterest, "There's some monster attacking Ponyville or something."
Bon Bon feigned annoyance to cover her concern, "What is it this time? A creature from Everfree Forest?"
Lyra looked over her shoulder and said in a lighthearted manner, "I think it's some sort of...bugbear."
Bon Bon looked over her shoulder in concern, "Did you say bugbear?"
She raced over to the window, peaked out and said with horror, "It found me."
"What are you talking about Bon Bon?"
Bon Bon lowered her head and looked out at the creature with narrowed eyes, "My name isn't Bon Bon. It's Special Agent Sweetie Drops. And I worked for a super secret monster hunting organization in Canterlot. Or at least I did until the bugbear got loose from Tartarus a few years back."
And then she went off, explaining how she was the one who caught the bugbear, and when it escaped the organization was disbanded and Celestia wanted complete deniability.
"And now, it has found me."
Lyra gave a quirked eyebrow, "Oh really? Well since we're now being honest with one another, the multiverse is broken and I'm stuck in a time loop. You know me as Lyra Heartstrings, the musician with a talent for the Lyre, but in truth I'm Lyra Heartstrings, the world class thief and human enthusiast who's robbed her way across the multiverse. I even stole parts from Doctor Whooves in an effort to prove humans exist, which instead resulted in my activation as a time looper. I've experienced millions of loops of the last five years since Twilight moved to Ponyville. Until recently, you've been a lot of things, a secret changeling, confectionist girlfriend, a seapony, human."
Sweetie Drops looked out the window, "Uh, Lyra, this is not a good time. Can we discuss this after the wedding? I'm just putting you in danger by being here."
Lyra waved her off, "Oh I wouldn't worry about that oversized bear. I've robbed casino vaults with more dangerous creatures than this...bugbear. You haven't known what it's like to live until you're on the run from the personal army of Terry Benedict."
Sweetie looked confused. "What...are you talking about?"
Lyra pulled out a suitcase filled with dozens of capsules and gadgets. She presses one of the capsules, releasing a bandolier of anesthetic grenades.
"What?!"
"I'm sorry, I couldn't tell you because you just weren't ready for the honest truth. But now that you're being honest about who you are, I feel I can be the same!"
Lyra pushed the door open and stepped into the crowd, "I have to go now and help my fellow loopers subdue this bugbear."
With that, the door slammed shut, leaving Sweetie Drops to gather her thoughts and study what Lyra just said. "Wait? Confectionist girlfriend?!"
After the Bugbear was subdued and the vows were exchanged (which was more awkward for Sweetie Drops this time around), Lyra sat at the usual bench they enjoyed together, taking a moment away from the afterparty. Sweetie Drops approached, looking uncomfortable. "Lyra...can we talk?"
Sweetie Drops rubbed her shoulder, "Look, in other universes, we were dating right? You said I was your confectionist girlfriend, but..."
Lyra blinked, and sighed. She feared this day may come, and here it was. "You're not into me like that, are you?"
Sweetie flinched, then dropped her head, "No. You're my best friend, but..."
Lyra wore a frown, then shook her head. She mustered up her courage and smiled at her best friend, saying, "That's not your fault, Bon-I mean Sweetie Drops. I've gotten to know so many of you, with so many backgrounds. Now, I can get to know baseline Bon...uh, Sweetie Drops."
Sweetie Drops shook her hoof, "You can still call me Bon Bon. I've gotten used to it, and sort of fond of the name."
Lyra smile dropped just a bit. Sweetie Drops...AKA Bon Bon looked down, unsure how to make her friend feel better. Then she perked up and replied, "Listen, I could contact Celestia and get permission to share some of my tales with the agency, and you can tell me about some of the capers you were on. I mean, if Celestia is...looping right?"
Lyra's smile returned to full brightness, "Oh yes, she's looping and even awake this loop."
With that, Lyra jumped off the bench and started trotting towards Celestia and Luna participating in the after party activities, the secret agent following in her footsteps.
185.17 (Detective Ethan Redfield)
"Sweetie Drops, these chains are not good enough! You need adamantium at the least to hold someone of Tirek's caliber. And preferably the floor made of adamantium else he'd just tear the chains from the floor. How did your agency ever get anything done with shoddy equipment like this?!"
Sweetie puffed out her cheeks, "Well excuse me, but the agency didn't have access to DOZENS OF UNIVERSES with materials strong enough to survive planets exploding!"
Lyra held up a hoof and muttered, "Fair enough. Let's just switch out these chains before the anesthetic wears off."
"Where did you even get an anesthetic nuke?"
"Don't tell Twilight?"
Sweetie Drops nodded, to which Lyra replied, "Trixie. She often tests her non-lethal ordnance here in Tartarus and her lethal ones a solar system over."
185.18 (Tangent)
Octavia looked at the book, written in her own mouthwriting, then read the attached note again before looking at Vinyl. "The note says to ask you to get cracking on a cliff-notes version of my journal. An abridged cliff-notes version of my journal. Apparently at least three of the last few iterations of me that you looped with spent the whole loop reading the journal and never got to the end before the loop ran out."
Vinyl rubbed a hoof against the back of her head and chuckled awkwardly. "Aheh... Yeah, I guess that was bound to happen sooner or later..."
Octavia looked down at the note in her hoof, at the book it was referencing, back at the note, and then at Vinyl. "All this note says is that 'stuff happened.' You can do better than that."
Vinyl sighed. "You didn't like my other versions of the condensed abridged cliff-notes of your journal either."
"Did they all say some variation of 'stuff happened'?"
"Well, yeah... What's your point?"
Octavia facehoofed, then sighed. "All right, fine. 'Stuff happened.' And in this loop, the 'stuff' that's going to 'happen' is you sitting right here and writing a proper cliff-notes version of this journal that does not include the words 'stuff' and 'happened' next to each other."
"Okay."
"And I'm going to sit right here and watch you write it."
"Erk!"
"And then we are going over to this 'Twilight Sparkle' pony you claim to be whatever this 'anchor' thing is, and have her proofread it."
"Hey now!"
"Oh, is something the matter? Is this Twilight Sparkle not going to support your story?"
"No, no, not that. She'd cop to it real quick if you asked her about it."
"Then what's the problem?"
"Well, mostly that the last time you had her proofread my cliff-notes of your journal, it ended up ten times longer than the journal itself..."
"The same journal that I can't even finish reading before one of these 'loops' ends?"
"What can I say? She's a quick reader."
Stats
Page generated in 0.061 seconds
Total duration
959 users online
1,222,725 hits today, 2,004,447 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
185.18: To be fair, if Octavia knew even half the stuff that happened in the Loops, she'd probably accept "stuff happened" as an acceptable answer.
Is Starlight looping?!
7755518
No, she's just observant enough to figure out that the loops are occurring over and over.
You know, Starlight and Angel is one of the strangest ships I have heard of, but for some odd reason, I can take it seriously in this setting.
This disturbs me greatly.
Tell me I'm not the only one wanting to read about other looper's run through 185.1
Laying it on real thick, Twilight.
Right. A prank type thing. Of course.
I'm more partial to the brown trenchcoat a la 10th or 11th Doctor, also OK with blue jacket and sword a la Future Trunks.
I don't doubt it.
A little megalomania never hurt anyone, so long as you don't go overboard.
That's usually the case.
Fair point I suppose.
That's the difference between Zephyr Breeze and Rainbow Dash. Zephyr's ego is undeserved. Rainbow is a pony capable of breaking the sound barrier and making it into the Wonderbolts, an elite flying team purely in terms of baseline. She can back up her ego. And Awake, I think she once flew at Warp Speed.
I love it when it's just 2 characters talking together.
Please?
You're lucky, Vi.
She's right, you know.
Again, Rarity's right. Nothing's more frustrating than bad banter.
All right, go for it.
Nah, you just have a penchant for intelligent conversation.
Whatever helps you sleep at night, buddy.
I can buy it.
She's a STAGE MAGICIAN, it's her shtick.
Oh, OK then.
185.16 ...They did NOT just make Lyrabon noncanon in the loops. There is absolutely no way that I can accept that Sparity is canon but not Lyrabon.
7764461 Eh... for all they know, that detail is too minor of a Variant to count as non-Baseline.
ok, this calls for TWO clips from a recent episode:
in the story, "a total eclipse of the fun" by Estee, Luna makes the mistake of asking Twilight for help writing a "one-sheet" for a press conference about an upcoming eclipse...and ends up with a treatise the size of a dictionary!
Did you get that from Cellspex’ reaction video to the Season 6 premiere?
... I really don't get Angel and Starlight. Especially when Dash and Gilda, and potentially Bon Bon and Lyra is being sunk here.
oh, in Norse mythology, Hel, aka Hela, was half-dead on her LEFT half...or was it the right half?
i remember a comic book where she suddenly fell over with one arm and leg useless when Thor yanked her CAPE off during a fight.