Set after Wonderbolts Academy but before Magical Mystery Cure. Rainbow Dash still remembers the Mare Do Well incident that taught her an important lesson: Real heroes don't brag. However, her sense of loyalty compels her to be the hero for ponies in need again, and with a trip to Cloudsdale just around the corner for her, Rainbow sees an opportunity for a fresh start in heroics as the very symbol of heroism who had taught her grace and humility. She couldn't have picked a better time, however, as a new enemy arrives in Cloudsdale that will pose a threat bigger then she could have imagined!
Now featured on Canterlot's Finest!
Now has a sequel, Mare Do Well: The Series
Chapters (10)
I will be the first to tell you, this is a good story.
Very few mistakes made in all 8 chapters.
Looking forward to the fight and the ending.
Thanks! I'm very scarily anal with proofreading yet on occasion stuff still slips by that I don't notice to later
, but I'm so glad you're enjoying it! I just got the next chapter up, then there'll be the ending up before the week is out!
Not soon enough
I doubt this whole MDW plan worked out as intended. The writers probably know that best.
i doubt will be seeing an episode like that any time soon.
Yeah, the episode was a very polarizing one among the fanbase to say the least
Pretty solid story, despite extremely petty motivations for villainy. The action was handled well and it wasn't a batman story rewritten. I approve.
Great job
i547.photobucket.com/albums/hh476/SiaFel/Avatars/coolstory.gif
Thank you both! I am now considering writing a collection of MDW one-shots, essentially they'll be of a more episodic formula that can either be seen as standalones or bridges between any potential long-running 'sequels' to this story if I make them. When I get time I'll write and post 'em in a new story!
I got the reference of screw attack
Nice story you have going here!
When the sky falls
When it crumbles
We will stand tall,
And face it all, together
Darn right! In addition to my love for superhero stories, that song was partially the inspiration for the fic. Not the movie the song was for, mind you, but the song, its melody, Adele's beautiful vocals, the lyrics, listening to it just made many of the ideas for the story crop up in my mind, and the fic was born.
Bane?
[youtube=fLFAXvFYhsE]
Not exactly. Razorbeak's mask is more like a full helmet that conceals every feature except for where the eyes can peer through.
That Bane, he may be stuck in Talia's friendzone but he sure can freestyle it with the best of 'em. And break hecklers.
2495626 I see you failed at replying
There were a few plot points that kinda bugged me, but man, this was a really entertaining story, probably gonna jump into the second one right away.
This was Awesome!
Really well written, well thought through and with some pleasant twists.
Dude...Lightning Dust just got dissed. I mean I know she was kicked out due to recklessness but DUDE...at least have her name on the list of former cadets!
NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
Dashie!!!!
Dang my love of a good superhero fic.
If 'Legend of Mare-do-Well', makes me think of a good Nightwing/Spider-man comic, then this fic has a feel of either a good Wally West Flash/ Booster Gold/C-lister fic or at the very least, a story where a new hero tries to replace the old. Now lets see what happens next...shall we?
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Thanks! Hope you enjoy the rest! I am familiar with Legend of Mare Do Well, which was great enough to get its own TV Tropes page, and another great one that leans more towards the Dark/gritty angle is Lessons In The Dark, which I also recommend giving a read.
And yeah, I noticed that too now, Rainbow does remind me of Wally a bit as well, and a little of Booster Gold, and like both, she grows and learns, making her become more serious and dedicated about the role she's chosen but never loses her proud, edgy nature that makes Rainbow Dash... well... Rainbow Dash. My next chapter in its sequel 'series' is almost done and will be up hopefully either tonight or tomorrow.
Cue Comeback
The dress might be useful, Rainbow! "Mild-mannered Cloudsdale socialite Rainbow Dash is a mare with an astonishing secret! For, after Celestia has lowered the sun, she becomes the guardian of the innocent! She is... Mare-do-Well!"
So! Mare-do-Well returns... and there is also someone who is clearly aiming to be her arch-rival!
Looks like this 'Razorbeak' dude is a 'mastermind'-class villain: Always has a plan and a scheme and also has no problem with his mooks getting beaten up because it hasn't happened to him. There will probably be villainous laughter and a lengthy monologue some time in the future.
Okay, so this griffin knows Dash.
That was a great battle scene. Rainbow is doing okay for a more-or-less rank amateur but luck can only take you so far and these Griffins are clearly playing for keeps. Whatever Razorbeak's motives are, they're political. If it's political, that means they're going to have fanaticism of a sort on their side and they've already shown they don't mind using lethal force.
I hope that Spitfire and Soarin are okay!
Nice job Scoots! There could yet be a job offer coming your way!
Yeah, this Razorbeak is pretty much reading off of the 'Bane' play-book, isn't he? Right down to letting Rainbow beat the stuffing out of his Mooks so he can get a handle on her fighting style and also wear her down.
As always, it is the power of Friendship that makes the difference. Friends always make you stronger. Going back to the fight even when you're hurt and scared? That's the sign of a true hero.
Like all masterminds, Razorbeak is at his weakest when he's having to re-plan on the fly, especially towards the end of his Master Plan (tm). This is because, like all masterminds, he's assuming that, by this point, everything will have fallen into place and it's just a matter of giving the final big speech and pressing the Big Red Button. It is an enormous and sanity-destabilising experience to realise that things are not going to plan. Expect a lot more mooks to get rough treatment.
It's pretty obvious that the griffin mooks are just expendable cannon-fodder. Razorbeak is very clearly in this for his own reasons; he has no interest in a bunch of thugs petty dreams of regaining the past glory of the Griffin Nation.
Rainbow Dash is rapidly demonstrating that she has the smarts she needs to be a superhero - She saw through those Changelings fairly easily.
By the way - how the heck did Razorbeak get Changelings on side? Something tells me that they're going to be a growing problem in days to come!
Nice final battle there. In the end, it had to be Dash and Glida to the end - One lives and one walks away. Glida's hatred and sense of victimhood allowed nothing else.
Rainbow shouldn't feel too guilty. Glida's completely disproportionate actions suggests that she always was a narcissistic psychopath, incapable of caring about anyone or anything except her own wants. If someone dares thwart her, well, she'll make them sorry in the biggest and most dramatic way possible. Her... evil... there's no other word for it, meant that there was no other choice about what came next. Glida chose her path; she had to walk it to the end.
This is not the end, nor is it the beginning of the end...
Is is, rather, the end of the beginning.
MARE-DO-WELL WILL RETURN!
At least I hope so!
That was a great little story. It had just the right pacing to be a comic-book adventure. The various characters were well-realised (even the mooks). You did a great job with your Big Bad and the reveal of Glida and her reason for doing what she was doing was nicely handled. She's a pretty typical Batman villain, isn't she? Completely obsessed with her own sense of greatness and how she thinks she has been wronged that she has lost all sense of proportion... and even sanity. I also loved Rainbow's recovery from a loss of confidence and the role her friends played in helping her get up and go again.
I really mean what I said above; I hope you tell more of the stories of Rainbow Dash, the Mysterious Mare-do-Well. Maybe Scoot can start trying to be a side-kick (without being asked... or wanted, in the tradition of Batgirl). There are lots of other villains in Rainbow Dash's history as well as the potential for OCs with a chip on their shoulder and a desire to prove themselves against Cloudsdale's mysterious protector, Sunset Shimmer and Chrysalis come to mind.
Here's a suggestion: Maybe Glida survived, horribly burnt but alive. But... her armour was burnt into her body. Her face has been scarred and disfigured so it is now unrecognisable as Glida... but the pattern of the mask of Razorbeak survives, seared forever into her living flesh. She is not Glida anymore. She is Razorbeak... and she will have her revenge! On Mare-do-Well at least; she isn't sane enough anymore to remember Dash except as another pony she hates (and there are so many!).
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Thanks! Loved all your comments and you definitely hit the nail on the head on a lot of what I was aiming to accomplish with this story and its characters
And minor spoiler: The dress will return one day.
This sentence is awkward, its not really clear what Leo is blocking with or throwing.
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Thanks for spotting that! Dunno how I missed it. All fixed now.
He's essentially holding up the ball he grabbed to block one that came at him, then throwing the one he was holding after
First chapter in, and I like this already; you got a talent for soliloquy.
Here's some thoughts that went through my mind while reading...
Now, I know Tank is pretty rough, but I'd think a "clunk" would be more fitting than a crash. Reason being that Dash catches the lamp; it hasn't crashed to the floor yet. Unless the "crash" here means he hit it so hard, it flew up into the air, giving Dash time to react even from within a dream. (She's fast, but that's insane skills.) Also, if she's jumping, that implies an increase in height; if a) her nightstand isn't absurdly tall, b) Rainbow is reacting from within a dream-state, and c) Tank didn't hit it hard enough to break it, then it makes sense to assume that the lamp should've hit the floor. Since she's jumping out of bed, she's traveling the opposite vector of the lamp: upwards. Forgoing that she probably doesn't sleep in a crouched, ready-to-take-off position, this would require a wing-beat/push-off to take off upwards, then another stroke to push her downwards to the lamp. Assuming that the gravitational constant is similar to Earth, and this is a regular-weighted lamp, the whole maneuver would require a series of movements within a half-second (max). A rough guesstimate of her wingspan size/weight would leave me wondering... how in Tartarus did she pull this off without creating a frakking rainboom in her room?!
Hang on, lemme go strangle my inner ocd pony.
But I digress; this would sound better with a mention to how the lamp was flying in midair; reaching the lamp on a simple downward fall would be imply insanely scary instinct. Also, "launched out of bed" would make more contextual sense?
...
I didn't notice her reprimanding Tank, or giving him some sort of negative attitude; she was asleep, so why is she apologizing to him? Unless this was inferring that tank came to her room for attention, and she was apologizing for not being awake to give him any? I dunno. Maybe a "Hey, Tank..." or "'Sup, Tank..." would work here?
Hrm... feels like a definite semicolon after "you see."
Does this mean there are other known superheros from different races outside ponykind? Super-griffins? Super-manticores? I'd probably just go with "some kinda costumed superhero."
Ooh, semicolon/"it wasn't one she liked" would be great, methinks.
Anyway, onward and upward.
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I sorta imagined it as her jumping from her bed and catching the lamp on the way down right before it hits the floor. But I digress, there probably are some moments I should touch up as my proofreading part of my mind can be a little careless at times. I do agree with the fixes tho and I'll incorporate them in at once
http://megamuffinss.deviantart.com/art/Razorbeak-and-Leo-386512471
I really didn't get a good description of leo unless i missed it.
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Looks about right, I don't think I ever gave him much of a description other then him being a large male griffon (probably a little bigger then Le Grande) with an old bomber jacket, so everything else is pretty much up to the artist
Rainbow has way cooler dreams than me. Who cares about the 'why' when you're fighting giant robots?
So, this seems promising so far. A few typos and tense slips here and there, but quite good none-the-less. I'm already eager for the final battle between Dash and this Razorbeak fellow.
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LOL thanks. If you got the joke about her dream there, then there's more points
Thanks, it means a lot to hear that. As for final battle, I'm hopeful you won't be disappointed!
Obligatory chapter reading music:
Things are really heating up, now. Wonder what this grudge is that old Beaky's harbouring?
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Yup, that was the song that inspired me to write it, humorously enough.
Oh you'll find out soon enough
Loving this story! So addicted!
Curious about the end of the chapter "Idols"
It says "The gem on it glowed for a second when Razorbeak pushed the switch on it, then seconds later Spitfire’s voice spoke from it."
Is Spitfire working for Razorbeak, or is this Spitfire an imposter undercover?
I'm going to end up reading this story all night, it's too good to stop!
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Awsome! And oh you shall see what's really going on!
Hope you enjoy the rest, and give a comment when ya reach the end!
3036279 Ok, I can't wait to read the rest!
I'll comment when I reach the end, which due to my curiosity, will probably tonight, Lol
Sorry if I'm asking a MILLION questions, but I just want to double check something.
Now, I've gathered that there is a impostor Spitfire and Soarin, and after this is revealed, the narrator says "...earning an amused chuckle from the costumed griffon."
I'm sure I know the answer to this(mostly due to details from the previous scene), but are the impostors the ones that are griffins in costumes, or is the narrator just referring to Razorbeak?
I'm pretty sure that it is Razorbeak in his costume, while the copies of Spitfire and Soarin are changelings, but I just want to confirm it.
Still loving the story! Can't wait to see what happens next!
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LOL it's all fine.
Yes, I was referring to Razorbeak. Razorbeak's the only griffon wearing some kind of costume(unless you count Leo wearing a bomber coat), same one he's worn all story. The wonderbolt imposters were all changelings.
3036921 Ok, I thought so. Thanks for dealing with me and my constant questions, Lol
Finished with chapter 8 and I thought I'd give a prediction I have about the remainder of the story before I continue.
I think Razorbeak is actually Gilda!
I believe this is true for several reasons:
1. Razorbeak and Gilda are both griffons.
2. Razorbeak's face is concealed by a mask, leaving it a mystery, opening the possibility of it being Gilda which people assumed was a male from her disguised voice and dark costume.
3. As stated by the narrator "His voice was a low, raspy tone that seemed to reverberate from some device concealed in the mask." The reason of the reverberation could be that Razorbeak's voice can be disguised by a device, providing the possibility that it is not his true voice, and that Gilda could be disguising her voice to throw people off of their suspicion.
4. It was said by Skylar that the reason Razorbeak is doing all of this is that he's settling some score. It's possible that Gilda wants revenge from when Rainbow embarrassed her by committing the practical jokes at Pinkie's party after being her friend for so long. It seems like overreacting but still slightly understandable.
I could definitely be wrong, but it's possible I'm right.
There's only one way to find out...*Runs off to read the rest of the story*