• Member Since 31st May, 2012
  • offline last seen March 24th

hauntu4ever


Believing is seeing.

E
Source

Her home destroyed and her life in ruin by the hooves of Twilight, Trixie is left with next to nothing. When a chance to turn her life around is presented by an unexpected source, she jumps at the opportunity. With the aid of her new mentor, Trixie might just be able to fulfill her thirst for revenge, and rebuild her life in the process.

A/N: This story takes place between Boast Busters and Magic Duel. However, it also takes place after Luna Eclipsed. Essentially, Boast Busters takes place somewhere in Season 2 for the purposes of this story. Find the reason why here.

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 21 )

Mmmm....Tasty story.

I'm looking forward to seeing how this turns out. I've always had a soft spot for Trixie even if she is annoying.

2396829
Curse you, Spike! :trixieshiftright:
2396990
As one of my favorite characters, I'm quite looking forward to this one, too!
2396969
:raritywink:

Why people downvoted this, I have no clue. It is a good story. :derpytongue2:
I look forward to an update.

How DARE YOU TIWLIGHT!!! :trixieshiftleft: You will pay for this! (With the alicorn amulet ha ha ha)

2433960
:raritywink:
2400942
Eep! Downvotes! They probably caught the problem with the paragraph indentations :moustache: Hope you enjoy the new chapter! :twilightsmile:

Nice chapter, keep up the good work.

YEAH!!! GO TRIXIE!!! HOORAY!!! Something finally goes your way! This is huge! Wait is this supposed to be like the series? Does Trixie get let off somewhere and find the alicorn amulet? Or is this AU?:trixieshiftleft:

2438389
Well, see, [SPOILERS]. :rainbowwild: I will, however, say that it's not AU~
2436642
Thanks!

Huzzah! This chapter is good. Although it is short. :derpytongue2:

But I blame you not. I know how difficult it can be to write a story. :moustache:

2456892
Difficult indeed. I still haven't figured out how people can pump out those insane 10k, 20k word chapters :pinkiegasp:

Hello! I'm here from the Good Grammar Directory to appraise this submission. I'm afraid to say that it's not quite ready yet, but the revisions required to change that are fairly minor. The errors are entirely punctuation errors; namely those involving a lack of commas and semicolons in a few specific sentences. For example:

walking distance and two colts

You'll need a comma before "and."

She had masterfully shown Trixie up defeating the Ursa Minor

I'd recommend placing a semicolon just ahead of "defeating."

She sighed and looked up

I’ll find a home somewhere and never travel further than the city limits

Once again; there should be a comma before "and."

I'd also like to add that the first paragraph is not indented, for whatever reason, and you don't need to put a space between every period in an ellipsis; though I suppose that could be a stylistic choice.

Simply revise the errors and the fic will more than qualify to be featured in the group's folders. Feel free to message me then. :twilightsmile:

3295057
I think we're going to have to agree to disagree on those commas. Especially the first one:

Just my luck for stopping in the only town in all of Equestria that happened to have an Ursa living within walking distance, and two colts foalish enough to go get it!

That doesn't sit right with me. If this were a list of more than two items, I would happily put it in there. As it is, it sounds a lot better without a break. This is just one long, single-breath thought. It's the same for the last one:

I’ll find a home somewhere, and never travel further than the city limits.

Again, that's a single thought. It shouldn't be broken up by a comma.
I will agree with you on the other comma, though:

She sighed, and looked up at the sparkling night sky.

While it wasn't my immediate thought, I could definitely see a break right there.

This semicolon is the only thing I have to expressly disagree with you on:

She had masterfully shown Trixie up; defeating the Ursa Minor without so much as breaking a sweat - and then she’d had the gall to tell Trixie that it wasn’t even an Ursa Major!

A semicolon is used to separate two full sentences that are connected in some way. The space after the semicolon has no subject. Therefore, a semicolon there is grammatically incorrect. A comma does nicely, though.

Thanks for the thoughts :twilightsmile:

3295493 You've made your case. Semicolons have always been a bit tricky for me, so I'm not going to argue with you on it; if anything you just made a lesson more clear than any English instructor I've ever had, believe it or not. :facehoof: As for the commas, I suppose this is what I get for attempting to judge grammar while I'm still resisting the urge to go back to sleep. :ajbemused: In any case, after brief research, I was clearly incorrect; your fic is more than qualified for the group's folders. :twilightsheepish:

Comment posted by Radical deleted Oct 8th, 2013

Please ignore the previous version of this comment if you have read it. It was not noticed that the story had already been marked as accepted despite remaining in our 'to be judged' folder over at the Good Grammar Directory.

A sincere apology.

I have to say, your The most magical unicorn story is amazing, I really hope you’ll make chapters soon I want to see how things will go at the end of your story.

10500962
Sorry to disappoint, but I probably won't be doing too much with this anymore. Much as I'd like to finish some of my planned stories, I've completely fallen off the saddle on writing, and I have a lot going on nowadays anyways. Still I'm glad you enjoyed what I posted! :twilightsmile: :twilightsmile: :twilightsmile:

10502665
Well okay. If you have other things to do that’s fine with me.

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