Before Luna and Celestia became Princesses, they were just two normal ponies. But when a new foe attacks Equestria, the two must embark on an adventure to fulfill their destinies.
Chapters (13)
QuiteNiceDynamite
Joined 4th Apr, 2013 ·
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More.
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more is on its way
thanks for the support guys, it's good to see that I can do something. Any constructive criticism and pointers would be kindly accepted.
hmm, very good, a bit more description would help though, maybe even help the reader understand Luna's pain better, and her love for the night, and fear of the light
2374551 thank you for the feedback
I may go back to change it depending on when I finish the chapter I'm working on now
Ooooo, the plot thickens! Rise of the sisters?
2375570 you never know
hopefully chapter 3 will be done today/tomorrow
by the way, what did you think about it? please be honest, don't hold back
Awesomeness. Pure awesomeness.
2376006 aww thanks
I love this! A bit more description would be nice though
2376065 you got it, i'll keep that in mind, thanks for the feedback!
2374574 ok, awesome, other then that, there isint anything you really need to improve on that I can think of, cant wait to see the rest ^^
So Discord is a killer...that was a little bit unexpected. And as i think your Discord's characterisation is more suitable for King Sombra than for Discord from "Return of Harmony". But this was 1,5 thousand years ago, so maybe he changed? Than why he changed?
And about Day and Night. No, really, 5 months without sun and ponies are still alive? That's really really hard to believe.
2378405 I said that Discord only killed them to stamp his authority, but he'll develop later in the story
2378405 and the ponies can live in the dark cos they're like the 300, fighting in the shade
2378603
That makes so much sense
Oh, and i meant not shade but food.
2378420
My point is if Discord don't have any problems with murder , why he didn't kill mane6? Anyway i believe in you
My main criticism of this chapter is that the story Cirrus told would have worked better as a flashback, or told in a manner that promoted paragraph breaks, It's a bit of a wall of text as is, if I'm honest.
2382480 i've changed it to paragraphs now
You're doing great; just don't give up!
2384492 thanks
I won't give up, but I'll probably start publishing less often cos I'm back at school on Monday so I'll have less writing time
2384508
that's very understandable (;
(loss for words.)
Luna and Celestia's parents were jerks
Love this story! You make the characters so believable. Luna and Celestia's parents seemed almost cartoonishly selfish, but considering some people...maybe not. XD
2391903 thanks, I think I'm all right at writing about jerks as I spend most of my week around many of them
2391906 thanks
it was an issue trying to display them. i tried to make it look as if they loved each other too much to help anyone else, while letting there be a reason to banish them.
I'm not sure if I pulled it off
DUN-DUN-DUUUUNNNN!!!!!! Why you always leave off at cliff hangers!
2403215 i can't help myself.
Goddamnit. My YAYZ face is gone D:
Awwwwww those last words.
Manly tears have been shed.
2420513 no, it's liquid pride :)
Fine. You were right it was liquid pride
2439620 thanks for all the support guys, wasn't expecting anywhere near 1000 views!
2440741 No problem! You deserved it!
2445259 thanks!