Princess Celestia woke up late and on the wrong side of the bed. When you're responsible for raising the sun each morning, sleeping in is never an option. Her majesty's day continues on the wrong hoof with argumentative advisers and a misbehaving draconequus until she snaps and decides she needs an escape.
Princess Celestia finds that escape in a mysterious trap door that sits in the castle basement. A door that should not exist and defies all logical explanation. When Celestia enters the hatch, she finds herself not somewhere else, but some-who else...
Chapters (8)
Okay, I can see how this is going. Let the shenanigans begin! dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Luna_lolface.png dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/lolface_Celestia.png dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Twilight_Sparkle_lolface.png dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Discord.png
And it's finally on FIMFiction!
Wow, now I have to go back and check for references. No, not for my resume; I'm still working.
I especially liked the screen-wrap half-conversations that ended with "want a stadium". Heh. Sim City reference FTW. dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Lyra_dealwithit.png
Very good job making everything seem disjointed. I don't think I've seen a better description of how someone thinks after skipping breakfast on top of sleeping poorly. No wonder the trap got her.
No, no direct experience. Why do you ask? (whistling) dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_TwilightWut.png
MORE!!!!
2374552
More shall come, yes.
My plan is to have a new chapter up every 2 days until completion. Barring any unforseen events like a Changeling invasion...
2375934 (Voice of Rocket J Squirrel) "But that trick never works!"
I approve of this.
perf
Sofa of Harmony? It might help to calm Luna down. (ducks the armoire) Nah, she's a pussy-cat.
Loced this and other "comparisons"> Took a little while to wrap my head around them, which made them even funnier.
Did not see this coming. but i love it.
Ah, steep learning curve FTW. This is going to be interesting. For anypony watching, that is.
Sofa of Harmony.
Weee ... I've caught up
Very interesting so far. Poor Discord is going to be so confused when he keeps waking up in strange situations, isn't he? Oh, I can see how Celestia may have fun with this
If I were to give any critique or advice, it's to cut down mercilessly on the use of names and such. Instead of "Celestia did X" or "The alicorn did X", in most cases "She did X" is fine. I think one name per paragraph max is probably a good rule of thumb, even less if it's a scene where only one character is present or active. You'd only have more if there's some potential for doubt. As long as the reader knows exactly what "she" refers to, there's not much reason to specify.
Noticed two small typos in this last chapter too
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Glad you found it interesting. Also, thanks for the feedback! Now that I look at the latest chapters, I am apparently abusing my name schemes for no reason. Hahaha... uh, oops? I'll clean it up a bit before the next chapter update!
Also, added a bit more to chapter 3 as it felt too short beforehand.
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It's the true hiding place of the Elements of Harmony, the fancy vault is just a decoy.
Soldiers always joke their way through the pain.
Celestia better pass a mirror soon. Or maybe we need to see a few stupefied Griffins. This could be hilarious - oh, wait... dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Discord.png
Today is a good day.
>Evil laughter
This is gonna be good...
You know, I have to wonder how long the trap door has been there. Obviously it's creation has SOMETHING to do with Discord. The actual purpose of it could vary wildly based on when it was made. If it was only made recently (post-"Keep Calm and Flutter On") then maybe he just made it to give Celestia/Luna a way to walk a mile in his metaphorical shoes. If it was around during the time that Discord was imprisoned in stone, then it there is a possibility of maliciousness in it. If somepony entered it while he was imprisoned in stone, then they would be trapped in the statue in his place, while to Discord's perspective the amount of time he is imprisoned in the statue would be lessened. It has a real big "I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream" vibe to it.
Or maybe I'm totally over-thinking this and Discord simply made it on a whim one day and promptly forgot about it.
I was momentarily confused by the sudden shift, until I remembered that you had added something to chapter 3. Upon reading that, the beginning of this chapter suddenly made much more sense
The chapters continue to amuse
And a couple minor errors
This sentence is a little weird to me, but I think those corrections fit your intention
Blueprints is normally one word.
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Thanks for the proofreading help there! "Blueprints" remains a tricky word for me.
DA FUK!?
Well, took me forever, but now that I have a working laptop again, it's time to go back to reading Being Chaos Malcontent.
For some reason, though, I see "screaming and running away" to be more of a solution that her faithful stupidPrincess Twilight Sparkle would employ rather than the co-princess of Equestria.
Still a fun read!
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Wow, you got the approval of Princess Celestia, herself! And here, I thought referencing her putting on weight and whatnot would have you sent to the moon faster than one of my Space Wings spacecraft can complete a jump!
In all seriousness, though, another awesome job.
Also, yes, "Sofa of Harmony" totally needs to be a thing.
And another chapter done!
I find myself agreeing with adcoon on Discord being so confused... and that's not a common feeling for the God of Chaos, I imagine!
Also appears you got Princess Celestia's "Eeyup" of Approval, as well!
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Well, you keep getting royal praise. This should be a good sign!
Almost caught up! Just one last chapter, and then I can sleep!
Chocolate milk?
Chocolate milk!
Chocolate milk?!
I don't think the universe is going to take this very well.
I prefer Death By Chocolate cake...
Ummm....wow.
I think Discord may have just accidentally the everything.
Cake is Celestia's nemesis. Of course, it's cake. Honestly, cake will kill her - oh, cake then death!
Chocolate Milk?
Lemon Curry?
2414062 Don't worry, Digo gets this way every now and then IRL.
How else could we have fought 5 of the Mane 6 (plus Spike) in a D&D campaign and never knew it until much later?
Or was that like Fight Club, and we don't talk about it?
Milk Chocolate!
What's going on? Man, that's a noodle scratcher. I like noodles
What else would be in Discord's head but Fluttershy and Chocolate Milk?
dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Discord.png
Best Discord line ever. Not only can he deliver a line like that, only he could.
What, first?
Eenope.
Nonetheless, fairly well written; held my attention to the end.
Clearly the shadows were Sombra. A lonely, form-less Sombra trapped in the basement of Canterlot Castle just wants to be loved and forgiven by the radiant Celestia ... d'aww
Great story
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When I began writing the story I thought to work in a mind***k ending, but I couldn't do it justice. Maybe when my writing skills get better I can give a better attempt.
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For some reason, I stopped getting e-mail alert for continued stories on FIMFiction.
No matter, I still talk to Digo in e-mail, so it was just a matter of time before I finally came back around and just read the rest of his story, myself!
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Well, regardless, that was a good story. Too bad the site no longer wants to send me e-mails reminding me that stories that I've favorited have new updates! I'm gonna have to check on that and see if somehow my settings changed to something vastly dumber or something.
Regardless, that was an excellent ending to an excellent story! This is why you have the best table-top role-plays, and why I constantly miss being in a game that you're running now. Eventually, though, I will move back up and we'll get to play on Saturdays once again!
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Thanks! I do miss you from the group. I hope you'll come back to us soon and share more fun at the games. I'll try not to be totally evil next time.
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What? No, do try to remain evil. In the end, that's what makes your games the most fun. Imagine how bland it would have been if I decided to just be nice and make everything easy for you guys when I ran OPRI; you all would still be, at best, level 2? Of course, I would have likely ran out of steam well before I did when I did, because you would've cleared those four cases in a matter of weeks, and then we would've been playing Shadowrun way earlier than we actually did.
So, what I'm saying is, stay evil, my
friendenemy."When there's trouble or when there's doubt, run in circles, scream and shout."
Ah, that much-used solution... works every time.
I reviewed your fic tonight you can find it here
This story is extremely underrated.
But I just want to know; what exactly happened with the ending?
Ooooh. Wet mane Celestia!
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