Conscious

by TwizzleDragon

Summit

I awoke.

I awoke in pain.

But I still woke, and that itself was enough for thousands of possibilities.

We weren’t anywhere that I could remember, in fact my sight was blurred from understanding this new location. I recalled water, a lot of it, all in a sideways spiral that lead into a dead end filled with nothing other than being left in unconsciousness. I despised being unconscious, it wasn’t like sleep at all, but it wasn’t like death. When you’re dead there is just an eternal void of wanting life and nothing else. Sleep is different, you know you’re asleep, you know you’re alive. Being unconscious though… it’s like some twisted mix between sleep and death. It’s like a coma without the rest, and I was for sure tired. I was always tired.

My sight started to return. My body was shattered from bludgeoned branches to shrapnel splinters all around me. I looked around and saw rock. This appeared to me as a cave of some sorts, one that lead upwards into a larger cavern system. There was a strange fungus dotting all over, it gave off an odd light, just like a firefly. It didn’t brighten everything up as sunlight would, but well enough to see around the area. The filly was huddled near a corner around the natural staircase. I didn’t see her move at all, it worried me but my body was weaker than my mind. There was nothing I could currently do for her. In hopes, I could perhaps regain strength in time to build back my body and begin an approach towards her.

Something scared me though, what if the worse had happened? Could I just have doomed my bore of a life to see the life of this creature be freed only to end it earlier than it would have had she been kept a slave? Would I be left with the burial? She was already sick and weak before this cave, what more could she handle with me alone to care for both of us?

I simply laid there, watching, waiting, resting, all with a thirst in my mind for something more, wanting for a feeling that I did not know, I could not name it, nor feel it, but I knew I wanted this feeling. It was odd. Of all the psychological anomalies that I would never understand, I couldn’t help but wonder, to think of all the vast possibilities that could be causing what I desired to know. All the chemicals, magic, and perhaps even biological trials that had brought into this instance, all of them to be unknown to others and I for life, and ages beyond, it interested me. The search for knowledge would go beyond anything, always feeding itself sand. It was in this strange moment when all my thoughts jumbled and collided that I had realized I was mad.

Next thing I knew, it was cold, hours had passed and the filly had stayed in the relevant area. I wasn’t as tired as I was before, able now to pull myself together as best as I could, which was well enough to walk, thankfully. Getting up was an interesting thing to do, seeing as how it gave me an artificial feeling. I was numb, limbs with no nerves, nothing to allow physical feeling, and yet there it was, against all odds I felt the dirt and rock against my bark as much as I imagined the filly could herself, though her existence wasn’t questionable, like my own.

I gathered back the many twigs and branches that had collapsed from my body, placing them back in their correct place and walked towards the filly’s location. She was still spurred around the same corner before I slept for the second time in what I could only see as a dry spot in the save. As I got closer, her chest was still moving, drawing breath into her fleshy lungs, what a sigh of relief it was.

Now I could see wooden boxes just around the corner. One of them, the closest to the filly in this enclosing section, had small scratches, dents, and teeth marks. She must’ve tried to open it. I nuzzled my snout next to her back and pushed her a little, trying to wake her. She refused. She hadn’t any food for days, nor clean water, the fatigue she had carried around had been too much for anypony of her stature. I wouldn’t be able to take her far like this without finding her sustenance, as well as some for myself.

Maybe she was onto something? I never knew where her kind usually got food, it would be strange for me if ponies stuck their food into crates, but what did I know? Either way, she tried to open one. I slammed my hind feet into the container, barely a scratch left. It wasn’t some cheap wood, something stronger than my own. I kept at it though, biting, scratching, slamming, kicking, anything that could work. Over time it weakened just enough for little chips to combine into cracks spanning over all sides, but only revealed shadows on the inside. I gave it another kick, and another, each time swinging around to peer into the openings. One more kick and I had gotten through the wooden barrier. As soon as I cleared it out I wished for my time back, all that I could find in the crate was some sort of mineral, all polished up and shiny in the correct light, useless. All my time wasted on one box, could the other ones hold the same product?

At the end of the room was a small exit, ramping up into the natural staircase, planted with low-set rails all the way up. There was some kind of civilization here, possibly ponies, possibly not, the answer relied on me going forward. Could I leave her behind for just a minute or two? She couldn’t go back, couldn’t wander anywhere even if she had the strength. What if something came by? I couldn’t let that small chance happen, because small chances have the biggest consequences when set just right. I picked her up, setting her on my back just as before, and began the summit.

The ascent was slow, merely walking up, following the trail prepared before us with rails. They were rusted, overused, and in desperate need of replacement. At least they spared me some use.

The filly moaned as her belly rumbled. I could feel it against my back, it made me thirst even more. She was such a cute little one, all the things she could do but never been able to show me, I wanted to see them all. I wanted to keep with her beyond our little adventure. She was different. She never screamed at me, or ran in terror just because of what I appeared to be, because she knew what I am is not the same as what I seem to be, just like her. A flightless pegasus, yet she was so much more than a pegasus, she was a new beginning, a new end, a new story, and beyond all, a friend. This was all I had been searching for this entire lifespan of mine, and her she was, not a name ever given, nor a conversation spoken and yet it felt like a year would go by with us protecting and caring for each other. And then these thoughts came at me from another angle. I felt… odd… as if I were attached to this stranger in a way that was creepy. So I destroyed my thoughts and went forward.

The path went through small caverns, eventually reaching back into the main area. We were getting nowhere at this speed. There hadn’t been a cart, nor a box since the bottom. It made the search feel futile, like it all didn’t exist and I had just been sleeping still, dreaming that I saw those objects and kept walking, only to wake up mid-sleep, believing the dream was reality.

Time passed and I had tired out. Looking up, I still couldn’t see where this was headed. Most of the cave was dark, if not for the luminous fungi, barely any sunlight now as the moon circled around again. All this time just going through this spiral, all the way up the an unknown top of some mountain, and it still seemed like it was the same loop, forced to play over and over against like the sun and the moon, chasing each other for eons. Was that our fate? To be stuck in some sort of parable until one day change comes, a small change that ends up becoming life or death, and maybe this is the end, forced into another loop, but at least in this one I wasn’t alone.

Eventually we came to a spot where the ground leveled out. It had a cart, a few boxes again. It seemed to me as another transport station. Pickaxes and other inanimate objects lied about, giving enough hint to this as an old abandoned mine of some sort. I pulled the filly off me carefully, setting her down next to a crate and nuzzled up next to her for a minute. I just needed enough rest to keep going for the next bit.

When I finally had enough to keep going I decided to wander around this area for a bit more. The filly needed more rest than me, surprisingly, as her life surely slipped away. Carrying her around all the time did no good for her anyways.

Looking around, I couldn’t find anything interesting out of the area. I guess I had enough time to just admire the handiwork. I stepped over to the cart. It was rusted out, the floor completely gone, and the wheels appeared to be eroded into the rails. There wasn’t anything special here. I guess I just wanted some time to stop again, like the old days, just lie down and admire the small things in life, like a leaf blowing in the wind. I kept staring at the broken cart before I began pacing around it, mapping every corner of it. In this constant turning, mesmerizing the same objects faults over and over that I didn’t even notice what it held beneath it.

Below its rotten bottom, puddled in a small hole, began the existence of a liquid. All these days searching for another source for myself and her it was, just another ration of blight water to quench my thirst. I kicked one of the sides of the cart, it gave away with such ease. I moved what of it I could out of the way and took my long awaited drink. It was fulfilling, it gave me life whereas other creatures it was poison. I guess it made sense, anything that could be eaten by everything seemed a little easy in the long term. It a second it was gone, I felt ready for another ten miles, but in truth I knew I could not even do three without a rest session. It had been enough time now anyways. It was time we started again. I went back to my little pony and picked her up. She snuggled herself as best as she could on my back, too rested to sleep now. It could be a while, I hope she’s up to it.

We continued once more for what I suspected to be miles upwards, stopping when necessary. Kept on following the only path we had since the start. It bored me. At worst luck, with nothing or nopony at the top, we could probably find another cart and slide down the slope quicker than it took to get to the peak.

I don’t recall it taking over a day, but the sunlight began to shine into the cavern again. I could see the opening at the summit, edged with what I could guess as rocks overlooking the opening. We were close, so very close.

Soon I could hear the chirping of a bird, the clashing of the wind against hard rock. There were no promises of any sentient life up there, but at least there was the pain of payment here. Then there were noises that seemed… odd… especially for ponies. Fire ravaged above, giving off intense heat, even I could feel it through the thick, touch rock ceiling. Metal slammed against metal. It was something new, extremely new. As the rampway lead to the final ascent I could see a gateway. It looked like it hadn’t been used in a long while, besides the cart-door on the side.

I knew this could’ve been the last bit of my journey with the filly. I knew this would happen. Even if I brought her to a pony civilization or a griffon civilization, or whatever this one proved to be, my kind wasn’t welcomed, never was. Maybe this was my purpose in life, just to waste it all entirely thinking myself so largely compared to the rest of my kind that I didn’t notice they lived more than me. So what if I lived for centuries before and perhaps after if my life didn’t begin until I wasted everything for one little creature. All this time and so little used. No regrets. Not now, not ever.

I lead myself up to the door, placing the filly right down next to me. The look in her eyes, so beautiful. She just stared at me, watching me as I kicked the door. There was no point in hiding, there wasn’t even anywhere to hide. I just sat down next to her and waited for a response, if any, had they even heard the knock through all the noise behind these giant metal doors. It seemed like a lifetime would pass before they would open, but they never did, at least not on their own.

I walked myself up the the smaller door, gently pressed my head against it, and it fell off its hinges. There wasn't much beyond the gate, not much I could see anyways, just a few rock formations and ruins of old houses. I went back for the filly, picked her up, and settled down in one of the abandoned houses. It acted as a windbreaker, a good one too, as this night was a cold one. I hoped that when the sun came again, I could get a view of the surrounding regions, and perhaps a way for the filly to return home.

Author's Note:

BEHOLD! IT IS BACK!
Also, sorry for the abrupt ending.
This gonna be fun to continue

Comments

[midashguy]

Beautiful! Absolutely Beautiful!

[ancientdragonduelist]

Hmm.. I am not entirely sure what's going on.

[TheWritingGuru]

I would give you a cookie for this, but I haz no idea where you live to send/give to you