WARNING:THERE IS A LOT OF SWEARING IN THIS!
Basically this story follows the reactions of some of my favourite characters from videogames and anime when they end up in Equestria and what happens to them over the course of the story.
Cover made by DeadlyLittleBunny (Aka. Galeking on DeviantART)
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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I hate to say this, but with all the grammar mistakes and no discernible plot, this story stinks.
It needs a LOT of work done on it. Sorry.
231667 well your honest' i'll say that but could you please go a bit further. i mean this is how i usally write in school and at home so please tell me the main problems... if you don't mind of course.
231843you forgot i can sorta preread if uou ask and also i finnaly found yime to read this and i'm gonna start now
232648 well if it's no problem with you, then sure. i'm working on the next chapter now and i am tired so i'll coninue with it tommorow or something.
232655spunds good though i can see people dislikeing how your portraying the mane 6 and how the ponys are reacting and such but i'm not that good at making it more show like though how pinkie pie acts makes sense to me
232693 i thought i did a good job with pinkie pie and flutter shy. ahh ohh well i'm having fun macking this and that's what matters.
232727no with Pinkie it seams legit but with shy not so much and i can't say about twilight yet but also how the other ponys reacted (non maine charechetrs) seems generaly just out of charichter and the names of twilights robbers
232743 flutter shy is the element of kindness so i dunno it looked good on paper. the thug thing i got from a show i watched the other day and the twilight at the bar thing... well before i wrote this, i noticed about 2 or 3 story's about twilight and alchoal so i thought it was a good idea i guess.
what about all the other charecters.
232754i've been reading a lot more fics than usual latly that stay almost as true to the charichters as though it was cannon so it might be because of that that i'm noticing small details other people wouldn't but to me it's mostly in the reacations of pretty much everyone besides the ones you crossedover cause i don't have a predetermaned idea on how they would be since i never watched their animes also you gave human names to some ponys
232788 well i was trying my best with the anime and videogame charecters. i kept travises ego and swearing in tact, i made krona shy as hell for the most part, tao a idiot (i love this charecter in the game but she's a absoulute idiot. there's one part were she's trying to catch a criminal, find's him and then befriends him!), i kept sonic as sonic i think, marston like marston i think ( i never finshed red dead redemption because my little bro showed me the ending! buck sack!) and noble 6 has nothing revealed at the moment and since all the spartans in the halo series have little personality, i can get away with a lot here.
232823just stated on sonic him marston and noble 6 i can confidently judge while the others i never heard of them before this fic so as i said before can't say anything about them
232844 well taokaka is, as i said before, a idiot but i'm willing to forgive this because she's adorable! she act's like a little kid, she's energetic, she keeps calling one of the charecters in teh game boobie lady for obvious reasons and is genrally a funny charecter.
krona is very shy, just like flutter shy but unlike flutter shy krona was made to be a weapon and sufferd her whole life from her mother!
krona's mother bassicly made krona's life a living hell, she almost lost her sainity and when she put in prison and her mother got let out... well let's just say that i swore a lot on that day. also she's got the most interesting power i've ever seen ever. she can control her own blood and harden it to protect her from injury. AWESOME!
travis is a otaku assassin that wressles, watches anime, fights with a light saber, i mean beam katana, and is well kinda ego tistical.
he always acts like a badass and i do hate him sometimes for how he acts around his job in the first game.
in the second game he went throgh some charecter development but not that much.
hope that cleared some things up.
232879Eeyup and sonic seems to be right to me and i'm on marston right now
232884 oh sonic was easy. i mean i love his games but personality wise.... yeah i'll just leave it there
232893Eeyup
232897 here's a question: would a rarity and macontosh shipping work?
232911Eeyup? it's a freaking fandom you could find a dimond tiarea X spike story if you tried hard enough or simply made one in fandom's the law's of physichs, personalty, time, and cannon all bow to the insane like were pinkie pie on steroids coffe and red bull
232923 well i've found luna+fluttershy, macontosh+zecora, spike + sweetie belles (creepy), but the oddest one that's got me curious is the macotosh + rainbow dash.
also giving pinkie pie red bull: ARE YOU MAD!? SHE'L OPEN THE 4TH WALL! wait that's a good thing.
232933already seen all of those i'm mostly looking for gilda ship fics not about dash and not based of the winter song Jackle App made for Griffon Village about her
232951 well i am planning a gilda and luna story. yeah i don't mind gilda ether and luna because... i don't know it was ether luna, celestia or trixie and i was so tired when thinking of this."
232933okay so marstion seems right except you forgot about how he has a wife and son back home though i can ignore that and noble 6 seems okay though if i can say something? you forgot she had cortana withy her when she was transported and sparten armour can both house AI's (Artifical Intelegnce's) and allow them to use the external and internal speakers to talk to the people around her also if you decide to alow hwer to have some wep's brought along remmeber all spartens carry around bear knifes and in the case of guns ether a assult rifle and a pistol or a assult rifle and a sparten laser also adding in dual wield energy swords as a third hidden weapon isn't out of the list of possiabilty's
232972 wait marston has a wife?! (note to self finsh red dead redemption)
and don't worry, i have the cortana thing. i'll have it in the next chapter for sure as for weapons, well i had the idea for the magnum and energy sword but not much else.
note: think of way for weapons to appear.
1)pinkie pie breacks 4th wall. 2)celestia summons weapons 3) speacal delivery from ditzy?
232989 let's try this comment again
4)you just never freking mentioned them
5)twilight enchants them to be invisable so as to not scare everypony
6)she left them under twilights guest bed
also i think Gilda X Luna was the best out of those possiabiltys and john marston left his guns in his bag also i have a plot twist idea cortana speaks rommanian because it's viata'a native tounge and so she has to translate what cortana says? google has a realy good translator if you have an account also 23 comments by 3 people and only one did less than two comments
233025 i'll go with number 6 for the weapons.
the romain thing sounds good but wasn't cortana designed to understand all languages or did i miss something in halo?
i guns in the bag for marston will work definatley.
the invisible guns thing has given me a idea though
233047nope but she has immense intelegnce so realy after about a day or two she would understand them wich explains why she dosen't enter the conversation and realt i liked numbers 4 and 5 the most but if you go with 6 we could add on a shit ton of extra ammo that was in the pelican wich therby allowed it to come with and we can give her more wepons as well like neadlers and a jet pack that for some reason works for a short time than magicly refuels...hmmm maybe it's powerd by light from the sun and moon? ahwell she's with pinkie so that can explain it for now
233067 well i did not know that about cortana. i assumed that since she was a computer program she could't adapt but what i did not know that.
the jetpack? i was thinking armour lock. the amount of times that has saved me online is in the hundreds.
number 5 by the way will be used but in a slightly differant way. let's just say it's be a massive surprise.
and hell i'll give more weapons. how does, 2 energy swords, a spartan lasor, assualt rifle, rocket launcher and of course her own fists!
still jetpacks are awesome.
233107i was actually thinking about the camo that also addes a silencer to your gun but a jet pack just seamed like more fun also Cortana is the most advanced powerful and unusualst of all AI's being a "smart" (not bult for only one tsk in particulear but for any and all tasks) AI means she can adapt to anything could hack you computer deleate your acconts take all your money and break all your relationships in only i'd say about 0.055 seconds if i had to estimate also AI's are bassed of humman brains wich die in the basing process but she wasn't because to give her spartens everything she could to help dr.Halsly creator of the spartens, their shields, their armour and their best weps and some ships had her braind cloned and then used the 1 surviving clone to make Cortana and gave her every possiable edge avalible so she's the smartest most adapteve AI ever to be made even better than many of the ultra advance forerunners who built a weapon capable of ending all life in the galexy in one fell swoop and she is also based of the brain of the smartest humman to ever live (the game is difrrent from what happens in the book but whatever she's still justt as smart ether way) though due to equestrias lack of technolgy she can't hack satalites and such since thay arn't there so she's basicly stuck inside viats armour though she wouyld only send a small part of her out to access the computers anyway
233154 okay so in short, she's an evolving computer? AWESOME
well considering the lack of tech there in equestia and considering that master chief has gone through some of the toughest situations against the flood (god i hate those ugly buggers) which don't really have technolygy, so cortana would be pretty useless in this situation... wait could she hack a spartana laser? if so i 've got a plan.
also i never read the halo books so that explains my lack of halo knowledge.
233178well she can use the suits HUD cammeras and audio recorders and such to see what's going on to provide tacticle data also she is practicly a humman (they don't call it Artificul Intelegence for nothing) just a humman who within 0.055 seconds could ruin your whole life and deleate all files onlinhe showing you exsistance since she can hack anything also she can't hack a sparten laser but since it hooks up to viatas HUD to use it's scope (same with snipers and such how the hell do you think there such good shots?) she can use it as well to see what's happening and who says magic with some help from pinkie can't make some death machine she can remotly control from viata's armour (it has data storage equal to that of a cramped space ship the size of a freaking mountin thanks to dr.Hasleys genius...so in short it's mposiable to recreate) so while she can't use any machines here she can provide tacticual data nad be your best freind also she can speed up your reaction time while she's in the armour and help you learn other langueges and such and dude it's freaking 11:30 in england why are you still up?
:233250 okay so she can't hack a spartan laser? damn that would of been helpful in the campaighn... but i digress.
i'm gonna sleep now so i'll look at all this again tommorow... probaley unless i have something planned that i forgot about.:twilightsheepish
in my plan i did make noble 6 a unicorn, just like tao so maybe they could amplyfie the spartan laser with magic? and possible cupcakes.
and the only reason i'm up is because... i have no clue. time went by i guess
233292the second icon didn't show up and good night also i think making her a unicorns a smart idea and how about we say she used magic to make it so she can use two powers? but no armour lock i've seen that used way to much it's just to OP for those who know how to use it correctly i know she should get the camo one though
I'm sorry, but I just couldn't bring myself to finish reading this.
And I believe it's spelt "Crona" not "Krona". That was really annoying me. And who's Mao??
235682 i always heard maka as mao in the anime for some reason. i'm guessing you don't like the story.
235812 Oh, so it's meant to be Maka? I suggest you go and change that before other people start getting confused.
And yeah, I don't really like it. Sorry buddy.
235904 there's to there own. i'm still happy macking this so oh well.
235909to tell you the truth this is just like me as a pony it has a rough not good begining but as it goes on it gets better and better till it goes from a 2 star fic to a 4.5 star fic
236704 well yeah i guess you could say that. i just get annoyed when people juage AN ENTIRE STory just on the first chapter only. it makes me rage
Okay! I shall try to read it all!
239035 aww thanks deadly. have fun! now if you exscuse me i have to make pie.
239035that's what i did with me as a pony and it turned out to be pretty good i've found tons of books with a slow monotinous and boring begining wich end up being awesome and actually are some of my favorite books i've ever read (though counting fanfictions they have literly claimed my top 3 favorite storrys)
239061 that's the funny thing with me. i can't write a good begging but it get's better from there. um why? no i'm serious why does this happen with me?
238106made a livestream yesterday for no reason here's a link what do you think?
239077 awesome i must say. FALCON BROHOOF!
239088nope better one 20% cooler brohoof!!! it's automaticly 20% cooler than any other brohoof
239107
your logic, it is flawless!
239128what? damit i've been taking leasons from pinkie pie and yet i can still pull of flawless logic? this makes no sense! wait that's a good thing yay!!!!
239168 logic makes sense and no sense at the same time. it's confusing but it makes sense.
239204Eeyup and did you ever make a live stream?
239209 well i used to review bad music. until i listened to rebecca black and tried to set fire to my ears to get the song out of my head. i've never reviewed since that incident.
239224why does everyone hate rebecca black? i actually thought she was pretty decent not like i'm gonna download the song but i thought it was pretty good and if you have a live stream how come i didn't see you on the people list?