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nanashi_jones

Joined November 2012
167 followers

"Perhaps the story now goes beyond the book." - Cornelia Funke, Inkheart

Groups

Stories (11)

  • Dreaming's Night
    On a midnight train bound for Canterlot, one mare carries a book to Princess Luna, and both their lives will be changed forever.

    8,105 words · 1,789 views · 205 likes · 2 dislikes
  • The Secret Life of Fluttershy
    Fluttershy says she's just tired from starting her new band, but Twilight suspects something else is going on since Fluttershy is too meek for that. Is Fluttershy fine or should Twilight be worried about her friend?
    6,294 words · 3,272 views · 398 likes · 8 dislikes
  • Scootaloo, Where Are Your Parents?
    Does anyone know where Scootaloo lives? How about her parents? Anypony seen them? Rainbow Dash would sure like to know, but Scootaloo won't tell and the town only has rumors.
    6,258 words · 7,872 views · 953 likes · 26 dislikes
  • Roller Skates and Yodeling: Guide for a Crushing Pinkie Pie
    Pinkie Pie has a CRUSH! Wait. She can do that? Rarity- heeeeeelp!
    7,193 words · 1,648 views · 182 likes · 4 dislikes
  • Lyra's Day Off
    3,615 words · 639 views · 52 likes · 0 dislikes
  • When The Mare Comes Around
    59,091 words · 1,558 views · 136 likes · 5 dislikes
  • Blossoming: Learning How To Fly
    66,317 words · 942 views · 86 likes · 3 dislikes
  • Two Years Before Harmony
    2,220 words · 475 views · 48 likes · 1 dislikes
  • Thrown
    2,264 words · 722 views · 45 likes · 3 dislikes
  • More Than A Dream
    64,267 words · 817 views · 52 likes · 4 dislikes

Blog Posts (34)

Source

"Twi, you gotta get me out of here. These human guys think I’m nuts! Nopony here has even heard of Equestria! Not to mention a pegasus or unicorn outside a book! I tried finding the other girls, but I couldn’t before I got locked up. We gotta find ‘em Twi. If we’re here, it can’t be good news back home.”

Aurora Amaryllis dreamed of ponies and Equestria her whole life. She'd long thought them just flights of fancy and products of a creative youth. Then, she met Rainbow Dash. Then, her hair started changing color. Then, she started meeting other strangers, all who claimed to know her and were her closest friends.

Aurora keeps saying it's all a dream, but soon it becomes all too real. Real enough that Equestria is in danger from a foe that threatens all of the lands. Real enough that she and these new strangers are the only ones who can stop it. Real enough that Aurora must meet a destiny not even meant for her.

Will Aurora help the Elements of Harmony, save Equestria from an unstoppable menace, and live to tell the tale? Or is it all just a dream?

Thanks to Yamino for use of the cover image.

First Published
27th Mar 2013
Last Modified
27th May 2013

Comments ( 69 )

#1 · Chapter 1 · 77w, 3d ago · · ·

The story is good so far, but can I ask how deeply you plan to go with psychological element? Not that I mind it, it's just that I hate when the ending (of the story) is left too open. It's good to know if the persons have truly gone mad :pinkiecrazy: or it is actually truly happening because of magic.

#2 · Chapter 1 · 77w, 3d ago · · ·

>>2329903

Each chapter expands on what the girls are going through as well as ties into some overall themes. There are answers, but I don't want to go any further without spoiling too much.

How's this- if you have any questions after the end, I will happily answer them because that means I didn't do my job or I've at least sparked your curiosity.

#3 · Chapter 1 · 77w, 3d ago · · ·

Yes! Best Mane human 6 ever! This is the first time I've ever done this in a comment before, buuuuuuut;

MOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#4 · Chapter 1 · 77w, 3d ago · · ·

>>2331059

:rainbowlaugh: Many thanks for the mo-ar. And there will be mo-ar. I promise. The story is set to update one chapter every Sunday really late/Monday squirrelly early for the next few weeks. Hope it continues to please.

#5 · Chapter 2 · 76w, 6d ago · · 1 ·

I love the continuation and can't wait to have the next update.

#6 · Chapter 2 · 76w, 6d ago · · ·

Well, if the physics defying Pinkie Pie cannot convince Aurora that she is Twilight, then she will definitely become crazy. Just Pinkie being Pinkie doesn't seem like an explication that she would use :pinkiecrazy:

#7 · Chapter 2 · 76w, 5d ago · · 1 ·

Oh, this is going to be awesome.

#8 · Chapter 2 · 76w, 5d ago · · ·

Well pinky isn't going to be hard but i think terry is spike:trixieshiftleft::trixieshiftright:

#9 · Chapter 2 · 76w, 13h ago · · ·

>>2356078

I think Terry's a girl, Spike is male

#10 · Chapter 3 · 75w, 6d ago · · ·

OMG! I can't wait for the next chapter! And I just got to say that this story has been one of the stories I have looked forward to updates the most, plus it gave me an idea for a story that I should be completing the first chapter to in the next day or two. Would you have any interest in reading it? Either way I really can't wait for the next chapter and hope it comes soon.

#11 · Chapter 3 · 75w, 6d ago · · ·

>>2392819

Thank you for the kind words.

If you PM me the link, I'll take a look at your first chapter when it's ready.

#12 · Chapter 3 · 75w, 6d ago · · ·

>>2392967

Thanks and will do.

#13 · Chapter 3 · 75w, 6d ago · · ·

"Eats Harmony" !? You can do that?! And here I thought Discord was bad with his chaos throwing wrenches in everyone's peace.

I'm guessing Twilight cast whatever this spell was for their survival; give them time to plan against this MONSTER THAT CANNOT BE, not to be confused with THAT WHICH SHOULD NOT BE, but very similar in some regards.

Roll for Sanity check.

#14 · Chapter 3 · 75w, 6d ago · · ·

HOW IN CLEASTIA NAME DOSE THAT THING EAT HARMONY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::applecry::applecry::applecry::applecry:

#15 · Chapter 3 · 75w, 5d ago · 2 · ·

Nothing like a good harmony sandwich every once and a while. Mmmmmmmm......harmony.

#16 · Chapter 4 · 74w, 5d ago · · 1 ·

Love the continuation and once again can't wait to read the next update.

#17 · Chapter 4 · 74w, 5d ago · · ·

If this spell was only to negate the old one. Where did all the other bodies go?

#18 · Chapter 4 · 74w, 5d ago · · ·

Hmmm, that was probably unintended...hope those girls they borrowed come out of this okay, cause it doesn't look like they're going back

#19 · Chapter 4 · 74w, 5d ago · · ·

Creepy math =Fractals: a pattern that repeats no matter how far you zoom in on it :moustache:

#20 · Chapter 4 · 74w, 4d ago · · ·

>>2431766

That was a lot of energy in the spell. It had to go somewhere...

#21 · Chapter 4 · 74w, 4d ago · · ·

>>2434712

It was just creepy math as far as I could tell. Pinkie and Twilight tried explaining it to me, but I blacked out when they started in on having to account for the weight of yellow.

Fractals sounds good though. Let's go with that.

#22 · Chapter 5 · 73w, 5d ago · · ·

“Being awesome doesn’t have to make sense,” Rainbow said from the back. “I kick impossible to the curb all the time, Twilight. You should really just accept it now.”

RD is a fan of Gurren Lagann.

#23 · Chapter 5 · 73w, 5d ago · 4 · ·

Never forget the sneaky ninja route. Ever.

#24 · Chapter 5 · 73w, 4d ago · · ·

>>2467630

It's a very important route after all.

#25 · Chapter 5 · 73w, 4d ago · · ·

>>2467630>>2474055 Cartoon logic is undeniable.:pinkiecrazy:

#26 · Chapter 6 · 72w, 5d ago · 2 · ·

Love the ending! That's just priceless. Too bad they don't have a surprised Princess Cadence emoticon or else I would have given you one. Can't wait for the next update and I wish that they'd come out faster than once a week. But you write nice long chapters that are almost guaranteed to make me smile, laugh and wish that this would be an episode and I know that if you rushed your pace your work wouldn't be as good. So I'm content on waiting a week for the next chapter. Can't wait to read next weeks chapter.

#27 · Chapter 6 · 72w, 5d ago · 1 · ·

>>2502279

But you write nice long chapters that are almost guaranteed to make me smile, laugh and wish that this would be an episode

Aw, those are the words every fanfic writer loves to hear. Thank you for your kind words and vociferous support, Twacky!

#28 · Chapter 6 · 72w, 5d ago · 1 · ·

>>2502488

No problem. There are lots of great fanfics on here but only a few are really worthy of becoming an episode. This is one of them.

#29 · Chapter 6 · 72w, 5d ago · 2 · ·

Well, they should see the good side. They just found a princess that should be easy to convince. I mean, she was Twilight's foalsitter. I'm sure there are a couple of embarrassing moments she can use.

#30 · Chapter 6 · 72w, 4d ago · · ·

I could just imagine what would happen if this thing happened to me. Fist/hoof bumping a ghostly figure in front of some pony would be epic.

#31 · Chapter 7 · 71w, 5d ago · 1 · ·

♪He's hanging from a cliff! And That's why he's called Cliff Hanger.♪

#32 · Chapter 7 · 71w, 5d ago · 1 · ·

oh god now i can't help but see pinkie di

"big bang par-ty ca-non- HA!" *huge blaste of pink energy, cake batter and streamers.*

#33 · Chapter 7 · 71w, 5d ago · · ·

That is cool I think Rainbow dash would agree :rainbowdetermined2::rainbowdetermined2::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::twilightsmile:

#34 · Chapter 3 · 71w, 1d ago · · ·

That description reminds me a lot of GMan's ponification.

#35 · Chapter 8 · 70w, 5d ago · · ·

*imagine high-pitched robotic voice*

"I love this show!"

---

Something like this would have made the pilot episode (back in S 1) so much better, and it'd have given a better motivation for the Six to become such good friends

#36 · Chapter 9 · 69w, 5d ago · · ·

>>2393844 you rolled a 7, +3 Discord bonus, +10 persintance bonus. Roll failed.

#37 · Chapter 9 · 69w, 5d ago · 1 · ·

>>2435553 Everyone knows the weight of yellow is the weight of blue to the power of :unsuresweetie:. Factor in the taste of purple, the answer is ¥7.341. It's so simple!

#38 · Chapter 9 · 69w, 5d ago · · ·

Enough said.

#39 · Chapter 9 · 69w, 5d ago · 1 · ·

And this, Smiling Pony/Human, is why too much of anything is bad for you. Now, have you learned your lesson? :ajsmug:

#40 · Chapter 9 · 69w, 5d ago · 2 · ·

Love this story, gotta say I didn't expect anyone to come up with a villain creepier than the Slender Pony.

#41 · Chapter 9 · 69w, 5d ago · · ·

>>2606939

Thank you. Thank you very much. I don't think I'm very good at creepy, so that's really nice of you to say.

#42 · Chapter 6 · 69w, 4d ago · · ·

About your purse, yeah, ithinks its gone.

Ooh... This is about to get serious

#43 · Chapter 7 · 69w, 4d ago · · ·

>>2537023

Or the Cupcakehameha.

#44 · Chapter 11 · 68w, 6d ago · · ·

Excellent ending, though, I was kinda expecting either Aurora finding a way back to Equestria, or Twilight suddenly appearing in Aurora's apartment.

#45 · Chapter 11 · 68w, 6d ago · 1 · ·

There are probably several ways that scene could have ended and still provide allusion to a future tale; this was a good ending.

I cannot wait until a possible future story.

'I'mma keep my eye on dis one, kay?'

#46 · Chapter 11 · 68w, 6d ago · · ·

So... I found this story way too late. Don't know how I missed it.

Well, I suppose I'll just have to keep an eye out for sequels, won't I?

#47 · Chapter 11 · 55w, 4d ago · 1 · ·

Wow. This story blew me away. Without a doubt, it has earned a place on my Favorites list.

Before I delve deeper into the review, I want to outright admit that this had one of the best representations of a humanized Mane 6 that I've ever seen. Every interaction and phrase fit their characters perfectly, and it shows that humanization can maintain that essential level of character despite what the critics may say.

In addition, the exploration of concepts such as tethered personalities and magic-on-Earth were original and refreshing to see. My favorite parts of the story were the wholly-human sections in the beginning where Aurora is just starting to understand what's going on within her universe along with the reader, which sets up this perfect curiosity: we know that ponies and magic will be involved, but how will you cleverly incorporate them into this otherwise-foreign universe?

Some of the scenes were highly clever and memorable as well. Aurora convincing the caretaker to put Iris under her care. Twilight explaining to Aurora how to use magic. Running into Princess Cadance by accident. The showdown with the Changelings in the hive. Aurora's final-fight dream sequence between herself and the Smiling Pony. The ending chapter of celebration and returning to life. The epilogue with Celestia and the star. All well-framed and highly memorable scenes.

Furthermore, your prose is highly effective and wonderfully composed. It says what it has to while being figurative and elegant enough to really capture that sense of wonder that encapsulates the story.

Simply put, this is one of my favorite Humanized stories. It's well composed, creatively original in its plot, and captures the magic of the Mane 6 without compromising their characters or their universe.

So then why does this story have a 34-4 ratio?

Part of it is the inevitable blind dislike. Part of it are people who just don't like humanized. Most of it I think is utterly undeserved... but no story is perfect. Here are my criticisms:

The Smiling Pony plot line felt out of place. I felt like this story was actually two separate stories somehow tied up into one.

Chapters 1-3 felt like the beginning of a separate story that occurs almost entirely in the human universe, where the conflict was Aurora figuring out who these strange people are and how she was connected to them, while at the same time trying to figure out how much she actually believes in their delusions of magic and ponies. These were my favorite sections because it approached humanization so differently, and it made for a lot of fun and interesting set-ups, seeing as we have five people who insist they're horses while the one skeptic is also the supposed leader of their group. It was a human drama about human society, a psychology/physics student, and the biggest experiment she had ever gotten tangled up in.

But then after Chapter 4, we suddenly get a, "Twilight suddenly gets it" moment that leads to the story taking a hard-left turn somewhere into Slenderman territory and becoming a kinda-generic Equestrian adventure story. It didn't flow very naturally either: the Smiling Pony was literally introduced almost half-way through the story, making it hard to invest or understand how he's the big-bad we're supposed to be fearing. And from then on out, the story becomes an adventure story, shifting gears so hard I could almost hear an actual clunk. It's saved somewhat by the spirit-tethering idea and the fun scenes where the humans had to figure things out on their own, but I had a hard time believing that the first half of the story and the last half were all part of a smoothly-transitioned, fully-coherent story.

Truth be told, the beginning and the ending were the best parts of the story that- oddly enough- fit well together. By the time you got to Chapter 8 and the big-bad-boss-fight, the awkwardness of the transition had already subsided, and we got to fully enjoy the excellent ending without being distracted.

The issue of the human names also came up as well. I won't lie that I'd forget whose name was which human, and which name was supposedly which pony, and thus whose name was supposedly which pony. Aurora, Iris, Ashley, Nova, Keiko, Diane, I only actually had their names cemented in my head halfway through the story. It may have just been a personal thing, but only Aurora and Diane's names seemed similar enough to their pony's name to be easy to remember. There was a missed (albiet perhaps cliche) opportunity to name Ashley as Jaquelin. Iris was an obscure enough to be somewhat memorable, but even then I had to check to make sure it was indeed Rainbow Dash. I often confused Nova to be Rarity's name instead of Fluttershy, as Nova sounds too bold and mode to represent Fluttershy. Keiko was easy enough once I realized that Rarity was half-Japanese, but at the same I felt that Keiko's name fit Fluttershy's personality better (for a while, I actually thought Fluttershy was the half-Japanese one).

It wasn't a big issue, but it was a bump in the road for readers with poor memories like mine.

The fact that I could only come up with two problems in this story should show just how much I liked this story. It wasn't perfect, and comes damn near greatness, but it is still a wonderful story that I recommend others read. "More Than A Dream" isn't just a case-study in, "needs more love", but of, "new ideas done right."

I'd give it an 8.8/10, with excellent marks on Humanization. This story is a new favorite of mine, one that I will definitely hold onto it.

#48 · Chapter 11 · 55w, 3d ago · · ·

>>3118104

Oh wow. Thank you so much for that in-depth criticism! I really appreciate it.

#49 · Chapter 11 · 53w, 2d ago · · ·

Wow. Now, while I can't top Col_StaR's in-depth comment and criticism, especially not at nearly six in the AM, I can say that this story has garnered a favourite from me and cemented my status as one of your followers. The quality of you and your editor's writing is fantastic and the make-up(for lack of a better word than the phrase: 'central stuff that makes up the story') of your stories is not something I'd be willing to miss. Thanks for the epic reads(more than just this story, of course :twilightsmile:).

#50 · Chapter 11 · 53w, 2d ago · · ·

>>3193484

You are most welcome!

Thank you for the kind words. :yay:

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