• Member Since 22nd Nov, 2011
  • offline last seen Monday

An hero


So, yeah, I'm a new writer, a fan of HiE and PoE fics, and am from the mid-atlantic Untied States.

T

[Second person] [Human in Equestria]. A quick one-shot satirical story that illustrates the general ease of taking over Equestria.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 53 )

badadada I'm gaining it.
McDonald's slogan

'MERICA!

Also FEATURE THIS SHIT ALREADY! WE NEED MOAR POLITICAL INCORRECTNESS!

The real question is: will it blend? Will there be horse meat in the burgers? I don't think the ponies would take too kindly to that.

This made my day haha! I love the satire :D

Hm... I should be finding this offensive...
But I'm too busy laughing my ass off reading through this.:pinkiecrazy:

Hmmm. Nah! Interesting idea but a little to silly for my taste sorry my good man but I think I'm going to have to pass on this one.

rename this to "how not to write satire"

seriosuly, you missed the mark completly

"One hay of a terribly written story." - Dusty (My OC)

I agree with ya Dust', this story is just plain bad. I'm questioning how it got thumbs up at all...

This story noy only fails at satire entirely, it is offensive and isn't even a good troll (if it is a troll fic).

Overall VERY bad story. I also don't enjoy the de-facing of my nations flag. You may call that being over-patriotic but im sure a French dude or a British chick would take kindly to having their nations flag defaced with the logo of the popular fast food chain in their nation. Just. A total. Fail.

2267563 Well first off, yes, that does seem a bit over-patriotic. What you call "flag defacing", I call "freedom of expression" and "art". Additionally, I don't think people really care much about virtual images so long as they don't provoke national dissent (like the confederate flag). I'll be honest, this was my first attempt at writing a satire, so I took inspiration from my favorite satire Borat. But yeah, I was attempting to cross the line twice (being so utterly offensive that it's just ridiculous). Lastly, calm yer butthurt bro.

2267611 It isn't overly patriotic to get pissed off at a story that makes fun of your nationality.

I am not buthurt either. Since you can't tell the difference between being pissed off and buthurt I will guess that you are new to the internet. WELCOME!

I still think this story is utterly terrible anyways.

Besides, if you took the time to read my comment you would know im not pissed off at you putting the McDonalds logo on the American flag. I am just not pleased with it, which I guess is like a very toned down version of being pissed.

2268042 Getting pissed off over a text file in the internet. You must be new here! And you'll have to forgive me for not being able to tell the difference, perhaps if you were better at conveying your message...

2268054 Another thing, that picture isn't even art, it looks like something you could make on MSPaint.

And if you have a problem with me hating on your story then to bad. Because you had to expect to get some hate after writing that. Really, I am more pissed off at the horrible writing than the constant pokes at American stereotypes. And don't you pull the "You couldn't do better card" because guess what? I suck at writing. But at least I put a little effort into it when I do try.
And by effort I don't mean putting proper spacings between paragraphs or spelling things correctly. I mean effort as in if I were writing satire I would at least try to make it a good story. This story lacks descriptive details especially. I mean where the fuck did the mirror pool thing even come from? He suddenly started falling, and even if you did take the time to work up to that point in the story the mirror pool thing shouldn't even be of use! Twilight used a boulder to cover it up.

2268077 You do not define art. If a single speck of paint on a canvas can be considered "art", then I don't see why the cover picture can't *coughButthurtcough*. I've no qualms with you hating the story. It was meant to be offensive after all. I'm aware that it would garner hate. I didn't pull the "you couldn't do better" card, I actually never said such a thing. I've spelled all the words correctly and I have used proper spacing. Or I have at the very least been led to believe so. Guess what? Proper spelling and spacing are a reflection of effort. Y'know, I'm involving Jesus and America, things like Twilight's magic, don't necessarily have to make sense when you're involving Jesus. Lastly, this was used as something to remove myself from a bout of writer's block (or did you not read the author's note?), it wasn't intended to showcase abilities, it was just meant to begin fleshing them out.

Lastly, bro, you seem kinda irritable. forgif.me/system/image/3299/image.gif

2268227 Again not reading my comments correctly. I never said you did pull that card, I said don't do it.

Also, as already stated I said there is a difference between being irritated or pissed and being butthurt.

2268248 Bro, you really need to work on conveying meaning.

Rucka rucka Ali lyrics are up in this- political incorrect ness is hilarious when we don't take it seriously so in conclusion I laughed haha thumbs up.

2268287 Good to see someone caught those.

2268286 Gah stop pulling the "I don't understand you" card! Anyone above the age of 7 would be able to understand my messages clearly.

You are just saying "you need to convey your messages!" when you run out of things to say in reply to me.

This was ....AMAZING

"The princesses, awestruck at your sexiness and capitalism, immediately offered themselves to you"... This is my new fetish :ajsmug:

A hilarious story, good sir. I'm an American, but that was the most i've laughed in a while. I needed it, too, because I was working all day and i'm kind of sore. This made it so that this day wasn't a bad one. An enthusiastic thumbs for you, and America. :trollestia:

As an american not sure whether to find this offensive, or hilarious.

2280852 I'd prefer the latter

2281437 alright cool because I have some friends from overseas at my school. And I love to troll the with some of these exact stereotypes you named. :moustache:

People who downvote this obviously doesn't know about satire... :facehoof:
They are probably Americans and they are probably working on stupid lawsuits against this godsend. :trollestia:

2350735

:facehoof: I can't believe I forgot about the lawsuit stereotype! Well, know that there will be a sequel.

So....... this is the story of texas, neat.

2351500 Please make a sequel with a different country, like Sweden. I am from Sweden and it could probably give a good laugh. :yay:

Oh my, the people who are getting upset over this satire need to shut it. It's a story. lol. :rainbowlaugh: I'll fav and like this. :moustache:

I'm a republican and i still fucking love this:ajsmug:

Anyone who thinks this is a bad fic is obviously a communist spy.

2267563

Especially you.

2766414 Well, then there are at least 32 dirty commies on this site. Not including Obama of course... Just wait for the sequels, the 1% and those who did things before they were cool shall play their part in the world's history as well.

When Michael Moore writes My Little Pony fan fiction :facehoof:

2766414 Shouldn't that work the other way around? People who like this fic are Communst spies instead of vice versa?

2827097 That sounds just like something a commie would say.

2827903 >implying communism is bad

2828279
>greentexting away from 4chan
>not even making it green

2829952

>fuck you I am redtexting

2830121
>you just activated my trap card

2831078

>your trap card can't hurt me

2833434
>the jimmies are eternal

2835825

>communist jimmies for the win

2858367 brainsyndicate.files.wordpress.com/2010/10/borat.jpg

2838502

>communist jimmies for the win

What are you? Unamerican?

2875603 Fine if your going to be like that...

>American jimmies for da win!

raising a fried-chicken grease covered finger to your chin

If he's white, then why does he have fried-chicken grease on his fingers and not, say, steak sauce? :trollestia:

:applejackconfused:What the fuck did I just read...

This I found to be a most enlightening text on the American Psyche. I say that the way this text was written probably is on par with the likes of Twain and Orwell, it being grand socio-political commentary that is edgy and bold.

Peace Bruda

6412699 I agree. I thought this would be some awesome kick ass American style story...instead I got the average american stereo type the world tends to see.

2828279 it is. Look at North Korea. They're starving and their military tech is so primitive they actually estimated it would take just 60-70 days to take over North Korea.

“Well, I know this Prince Blueballs. He’s living like a king. He don't do shit, he just sit, shit, and get shit for free. How the hell are you gonna let him pay for his shit with the money he took from you. Mother fucker, let him pay for it. I say we blow that bitch up like Pakistan and Osama Bin Laden.”

Careful there, you're sounding like a communist...

You walked to a building that looked like it was made of gingerbread and swallowed it whole, it’s fine though, you already have Type-1 Diabetes and low blood pressure.

It's very impressive he still has low blood pressure...

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