(9) Betrayal
Edited by AnonyMouse
Chapter 9: Betrayal
Once, long ago, there was a time when man did not have the luxuries that kept him comfortably out of reach from the hand of natural selection and adaptation. This so called Stone Age is easily forgotten by the common man, and some don't even believe such a time existed. Man's origins remain shrouded in the mists of time, but archaeological evidence tells a story. Against the trials of nature and the hardships that the environment presented us, man not only survived with its primitive lifestyle but managed to prosper in it as well. The first ever dramatic increase in our survivability came from our understanding of how things grow, and how a little seed could be cultivated into a field of food. Agriculture was soon born, and alongside the traditional practices of hunting man’s chances of survival increased exponentially.
Man was born with the will to survive and conquer; it is in our blood that we not only make do with the card we are given, we make the very best of it.
Despite this proud ancient heritage, my most recent city-dwelling ancestors seemed to have forgotten their humble roots for the sake of survival in a hostile society that bartered with slips of paper for goods. In just the last few centuries, society has lost almost all of its wilderness survival knowledge, our instincts dulled by comfort and convenience. Sometimes I could swear this forest goes out of its way to cause me harm.
I returned late last night to find the last supplies of berries and leeks to be ransacked not by dreaded timber wolves or some other beast but by rabbits of all things. I chased after them, hoping to ring their necks and replace them with my stolen foods. What I figured to be an easy task for one of nature’s most hardened and intuitive of creatures turned out to be impossible. My hands clasped only air and I was reduced to looking like a fool chasing after laughing bunnies. Why couldn’t something more vicious come to kill me and not these mocking white furred vermin that seemed to slip through my grasp like water? I chased them off as they carried what they could of my supplies with them and I was left with very little of my already scarce food supply. Few hours were left in the night and for most of them I found sleep eluding me with my mind running wild with thoughts of rabbit stew.
At first light I awoke with an aching lower back, a subtle reminder of my advancing age. I was forty-five, and despite my peak physical condition the thought of being such an age was enough to agitate my joints and the old wounds that never healed quite properly. Small annoyance, wouldn’t hinder me for today’s tasks. I set about making a better hiding spot for my food supplies. Digging out dirt from underneath one of the larger rocks, I made a hovel to place the food sacks in, using a small layer of smaller rocks and some dirt to secure it. Only concern would be insects or digging vermin getting to it. For now the knap sacks my supplies rested in would have to do for protection against the elements.
Next I tried my hand at constructing a makeshift net out of vines. Some time ago I had discovered the strength the forest’s intertwining series of vines that covered the trees and strung them together like the canopy of a rainforest. They were thick and strong, not very elastic and some covered in a sap or oil that made them difficult to handle. Had no other material to work with though and so sat there trying to knot a diamond patterned net from the vines, mostly without success. Let’s see if those rabbits come again, they’ll be in for a surprise when I break their necks.
It was midday by the time I got any progress done. My net, if it could be called as such, looked more like a tangle of moss green ropes rather than having any discernible purpose. How anyone could grasp the concept of making a net seemed beyond me; skills in textile work were of no help to me here.
I scowl and toss away the tangled mass so I could deal with it later. More likely I’ll toss it into the river out of spite. Giving a rough sigh I sit on the dirt ground watching the clouds in the sky pass by. The heat of the day was strong but the contrasting coolness to the cave made it bearable. In the distance I hear the deep growl of a lion or some other catlike creature. Didn’t fill me with dread as it did when I first heard it. Perhaps one day I will have the chance encounter with the creature, but for now it was part of the background. Just another sound to be heard in the forest, as natural as hearing the birds give their calls.
The peace was all disturbed with the faint sound of movement in the brush just before my grove. I made no move to stand up; animals would not be so blatant in their approach, and by now the Timber Wolves knew that I was not a creature to be tampered with. Most likely it was a pony, at the rate of visitors I seem to get in what I hoped was a remote location I would have to consider making a path from the willow to my home. Was getting tired of being startled when I heard the sounds of the thicket being disturbed.
Just as I thought, from the shadow of the trees I can already make out the pastel lavender colors of the one called Twilight Sparkle. Did not expect to see her again so soon, especially not here in my neck of the woods. She broke through the underbrush with some mild effort and stood for a moment on the grove’s edge. She was sweating and panting as if she had been running to get here. My senses tell me something might have been wrong but I wait for her to catch her breath to confirm my suspicions.
She finally catches her breath and looks around the grove in search of something. She sees me swiftly and trots over rather hurriedly to where I sat against the rocky outcropping of the cave. “Rorschach, I need you to come back with me to Ponyville.” She states with strong authority. She had some nerve to come and order me around in my home I thought but did not voice it.
“Why,” I harshly ask her and I can see her resolve dwindle at my tone. I felt a small hint of guilt. “I’m sorry,” I find myself saying, “What's the problem?”
To my surprise she takes no comfort in my apology, instead she seems even more put at unease as she gnaws on her lower lip. “Well… it’s hard to explain, but I just really need you to come back to the library with me. It’s really important.”
Perhaps she knows I took her book? Still doesn’t entirely explain why she wanted me to go back with her. Her reluctance to explain rings warning bells in my head but I choose to ignore them. I highly doubted this pony could scheme, let alone effectively lie. “Wouldn't be wise to go into town, we discussed this before.” I calmly explain to her.
“I know, but something’s changed that I really need to talk to you about back at home. It concerns you staying here in the forest.” She replies hesitantly, as if she were trying her best to find the right words to a half-truth. It was obvious she was keeping something from me but I still didn’t understand the reason for her to do so, so for now I’d just have to humor her.
I give an annoyed sigh and pick up the discarded tangle of vines next to me so that I had something to work with while this pony tried to explain herself to me. So far she was doing very poorly. “Not about to go live in town,” I say as best I can without sounding blunt or harsh.
“No that isn’t what… What I mean is… I’d really appreciate it…. Something…,” she stutters out of confliction until finally she blurts out, “Applejack and my friends might be in danger!”
The forest itself seems to take in a startled breath as her voice echoes across the rocky side of the mountain and around the grove. The birds seemed to dull their song as I turn to look at her in the eye. She shrinks back at my gaze but doesn’t say anything, instead biting at her lower lip again. The alarms in my head scream that she is lying to my face but I can’t help but feel my protective instincts take over. If there was the remotest chance the orange pony was in danger again… lie or not I will take the risk. I stand up and step into the cave, Twilight begins to protest but I hold out my hand to stop her from speaking any further. Going to my bags I open one up and take out the book I had taken from the library days ago. I shove it into the pocket of my trench coat and turn around to face her. I give her a nod and say, “Lead the way.”
We go to the Willow tree that marked the direction of Ponyville. All the while I watch her as we walk in our awkward silence. Human or pony, I could recognize the walk of a guilty conscience and the lavender unicorn had the gait of someone with a boulder of guilt upon their shoulders. I’m not sure what I would do if I found out she was lying to me about her friends being in danger. A strong chastising likely, perhaps tell her the story of boy who cried wolf. My prime concern still remained on what purpose she had for speaking a lie. The obvious thoughts were usually the same, dark and foreboding, yet I could never match up such things to the bright colored intellectual Twilight Sparkle. I still barely knew her, but from what I could tell none of these ponies held the malice or selfishness that I was accustomed to. In a way it unnerved me as I could no longer predict what move they would make. A lying man you could trust to never tell the truth, but you could never tell when the honest man chose to lie. In this case it was ponies, but the concept was still the same.
We reached the Willow without a word and turned towards Ponyville when I had a sudden realization. Perhaps she or others had found the bodies that I had buried? It might be she gained the wrong conclusion from it, that an unknown danger stalked Ponyville. She was smart though, would she not come to the conclusion that I, a foreign and potentially dangerous entity would likely be to blame for the killings? It seemed the logical result. My sudden appearance, the first killings in who knows how long?
The idea still felt out of place to me though, she didn’t seem scared of me or shy away out of terror in my presence as it should when confronted with a murderer. I saw only guilt in her state and unease of her mind. Even if she still thought it was another stalker amidst them that was to be blamed for the killing it would be fear that drove her, not guilt. What reason could there be for her to feel remorseful? She told me a lie but she didn’t seem the type to tell a falsehood unless it was necessary.
All I could think now was: this better not be another party.
Her party might have been more enjoyable than I had first thought but still I would rather not have to go through the ordeal yet again the very next day. This theory seemed wrong too, since the pink pony made the trip herself to give me her awful musical invitation for her last party and I doubted Twilight would be sent in her place to get me to come. Unless it was a surprise party, in which case I would leave immediately. Yet again the reason didn’t fit; her terminology back in the grove had been vague but rather specific that this was not a pleasant surprise. Something was wrong but I could not figure out what it could be.
She walked some steps ahead of me, her mind still at unease as she glanced around the forest but never at me. It would make sense to simply ask her what it was that bothered her but doubted she would give me a straight answer in the time it took to get to town. Let her wallow in her guilt for now, I’d see soon enough what little fib she was keeping.
We step out of the forest and head straight into town. I move to stop her so as to tell her it was unwise for me to wander straight into town but I find that I don’t need to correct her. Passing by the first building into Ponyville I am surprised to see the place empty of the usual activity. There were no sounds of laughter or talking, just an uneasy silence.
I was immediately alarmed and discomforted at this strange foreboding silence that seemed to encompass the entire town.
Twilight doesn’t seem to notice, or perhaps she instead already knows the reason why this was so. She doesn’t stop or alter her pace for my sake. All the time she was looking at the ground as she walked in the direction of her tree home. I feel my hands clench on instinct inside my pockets, a natural reflex when I felt that trouble was about. Perhaps her lie had some basis after all? Maybe something else was afoot in this normally happy town? I’d get my answers soon enough.
We get to her door and I can see the ornate door was already left slightly open. Inside I could see only darkness. She stops short of the threshold and turns to watch my approach. She forces an awkward smile and says nervously with a slight laugh, “Well here we are.” She pushes the door open with a shaky hoof and I take a few steps forward to enter.
I abruptly stop just before the door’s threshold; something wasn’t right here.
I look down at her and she tries her best to act like everything is fine, I know by now that wasn’t so. From beyond the open door I could see the inside was dark, pitch black to be exact. My eyes flick towards the windows and my suspicions are confirmed that all the curtains were drawn so that no light could enter. It was unnaturally silent in there. This was not the moment just before a surprise was sprung. My instincts told me there was no joyful amazement waiting for me inside. One of the window curtains flutter slightly, brushed by someone waiting behind it. My suspicions feel confirmed.
I slowly turn my gaze upon the lavender unicorn, she’s terrified now of me. She couldn’t see it but she could feel the pure malicious expression I was giving her. My face contorted, my nose twitches with a barely contained rage that was slowly building in me.
“You tricked me,” I say with all my malevolent spite.
She shrinks away and stutters out syllables in an attempt to explain but I do not want to hear it. I have been betrayed.
No sooner had I taken two threatening steps towards the cowering unicorn did I see something white appear from one of the thick branches of Twilight’s home and race down. I move to defend myself but already the attacking thing had collided with me and we were both sent tumbling into the dim tree home. The door was shut and we were plunged into darkness.
I could hear Twilight banging on the wooden door trying to get in but it seemed someone else had closed it upon her. My concern remained the thing that was upon me. I could feel through the darkness that it wore armor, it was definitely a pony. I felt wings, correction, it was a Pegasus. We struggle upon the ground and I can hear someone telling us to stop, a feminine and regal voice that was not Twilight Sparkle’s. Neither of us listens. The Pegasus tries to pin me down but he obviously has never had to deal with someone my size and with the advantage of thumbs before.
Through our struggling I grab hold of one of the Pegasus’ wings at the joint and twisted until I heard the popping of cartilage and bone. The Pegasus gives a shout of pain and momentarily his strength is weakened. I take the chance by plowing my forehead against his exposed snout and kneed him in his abdomen. I pitch him off of me and managed to stand up again. I can see him in the darkness try to recover as he fluttered his damaged wing, I don’t want to give him the chance and with a swift kick to his side I send him crashing against a wall and ripped away one of the curtains that blocked the light out of the room. I was placed back into the light and had the chance to see another white Pegasus appear from the shadows. He turned around and tried to buck back into my chest. I take a step back and let his back legs strike the air just before my face.
I grab one of its back legs and use it as leverage as I use my knee to strike his side so that I may bring him down on his side. He is quick to recover thanks to the golden armor he wore and I’m forced back as he kicked out again. With the help of his wings he gets back up and rears his front legs forward to strike me. I feel the air in my lungs knocked out as the hooves strike me but I was willing to take the hit and let his front hooves continue to try and pummel my ribcage. Bringing my hands up, I slapped my palms against the pony’s ears. The stunning blow causes the Pegasus to shake his head from the resounding strike while stopping his own attacks. Sweeping my legs under the pony I pushed him off and let him fall onto his back.
I was upon him, smashing my fists against his snarling snout as the regal voice behind me shouted for me to stop. The second Pegasus appears to aid his companion. Knocking me to the ground he tries to stomp upon my face with his front hooves. I’m able to counter by delivering a sharp elbow to the pony’s face. A following punch forced him off of me.
He fell upon the ground, dazed and bleeding as I stand up. I prepare to plant my foot upon his exposed neck, intent on snapping it.
“Stop this at once!” the noble voice cries out and light fills the room. The curtains fall from their places from the windows and I turn and see a familiar princess rise from the floor, light emanating from her glorious white form. My foot poised to stomp down on the Pegasus’ neck began to descend but I feel my body in motion before I could finish him. My sight is a blur as I smash into a bookcase.
My hat falls from my head and fall to my knees but I barely notice its loss as I turned to glare at the princess. I move to stand back up but feel my body struck hard by an invisible force again. It felt like I had been struck by a car as I’m crushed once more against the book case. I fall back to my knees and plant my palms against the wooden floor as books fell upon my prone form, prostrated before the princess that had flung me like a rag doll against the bookcase. I cough and feel blood stain the interior of my face but I find myself softly laughing at the situation.
To think, twice in a lifetime I find myself faced against a godlike creature.
The princess walks over to me, her voice grave and calm, “I don’t want to hurt you but I won’t allow you to harm anymore of my ponies.”
I push myself forward hoping to catch her by surprise but I find myself flattened against the bookcase and flung hard against the ground yet again. I try to stand back up but it feels as though gravity itself is working against me. Still I try to stand up, still I choose to fight. Never compromise, especially in the face of death.
“Please… don’t try to get back up…. Don’t make me hurt you,” she now sounds on the verge of tears but somehow maintains that regal authority. Perhaps she was truly contemplating putting me down for good.
“Kill me now then! You think I'll just lay down and take a beating?” I harshly said as I glare back up to her, spitting blood until the sanguine stain could be seen from the outside of my mask.
She seems taken aback by my words and prepares to speak when the door to Twilight’s home is forced open. I see a familiar orange pony rush in, crying out “Wait!”
I take this chance distraction to try and reach the princess. I had no plan in mind; I had no reason to keep fighting anymore. I just wanted a good way to die. To go down fighting against the insurmountable as I always should have. Just as I expected the Princess forced me back, likely with more force than she intended as my charge seemed to startle her.
The back of my head smashes against the wooden shelves of the bookcase and my sight starts to darken. I feel a warm dampness envelop the back of my hair. The block blots of my face move to cover my eyes to help speed me along to the comforting darkness. I topple to the ground before me.
I’m satisfied to see the horrified expression on Princess Celestia’s face just as darkness claims me. At least it was more satisfying than seeing the passive gaze of Dr. Manhattan.
A bright white light fills my eyes, I should be blinded but I don’t look away. All I can see is that comforting light that envelops everything in its soothing glow. In the distance I can hear the soft falling of peaceful rain as it strikes upon the ground. I can smell the rain but could not see it; there was only the white peaceful light that seemed to cover everything.
I breathe a content sigh and the brilliance of the white light falters enough so that I may see. I am standing on lush grass, a small circular patch of greenery in an otherwise pure white light. In front of me stands a swing set, freshly painted a fire truck red. I can see stickers of rainbows, dinosaurs, and smiling yellow faces dot the painted steel piping. One smiley face looks straight at me, a drop of red paint falling across its surface and over one of its black eyes. I realize I don’t have my face on when a distant breeze from the rain caught my tangle mess of red hair. I don’t feel concerned by it, I don’t feel exposed. Somehow it all feels right.
I close my eyes to listen to the sound of the rain falling; a calmness I haven’t felt in such a long time permeates through me. I open them again when I hear someone humming. A young girl sat on one of the swing set’s seats with her back to me, her long brown hair brushed by the phantom wind of the rain gently. She wore a white and blue plaid dress; reminded me of the dress Dorothy wore in the Wizard of Oz in a happier time, in a happier place. Her black shoes shined in the white light that surrounded us, waxed and rubbed to perfection. Her hands were busy arranging the stems of white daisies into a crown as she hummed a song that had no rhyme or reason. It was a child’s song, hummed just for the sake of happiness and to pass the time.
I already know who it is and I want to run and hide in my shame. Instead I find myself stepping forward, towards the swing set and to the girl that has haunted my conscience for such a long time. She turns her head to me and gives me a warm smile. My nose burns, my eyes well up with tears as I return her innocent smile with my own sad one. Her eyes were blue, just like the picture. Freckles dotted her dimples; defining and complimenting her smile, nowhere near the amount of ugly freckles that dotted my own face. She looked just like she did from my dreams.
She would have been so beautiful if she had been given the chance.
“Hi there Mr. Rory,” she says happily and widens her smile to show her missing front tooth. She had lost it weeks before, her mother said, she had been so happy that she kept it from the tooth fairy just for safe keeping, citing she didn’t need any silver dollar in exchange for her trophy.
“Hi there Blair,” I say, nearly choking on my own words. I could feel the first of my tears crawl down my face and drip down upon the grass before me.
She’s still smiling at me, never faulting in her happiness to see me. I want to break down now, to fall to my knees and beg her to forgive me. I want to plead for her to be alright even though I know in my heart it isn’t true, I want to implore God himself she hadn’t been murdered. I don’t give in to my weakness, not yet. I stand there smiling back at her until she turns around to put the finishing touches on her crown of daisies. Going around the swing set I sit down in the seat next to her, the seat swings under my weight and I feel the urge to let go of my place on the ground; to let myself swing freely and not be tethered down to the ground.
I feel content to simply sit there and watch her patiently weave the stems through each other into a beautiful lace. “You got rid of your pigtails,” I say finally. She wore pigtails in the picture but her father had said she was waiting for the chance to grow her hair out like her mother. This is how she looked in my dreams, the way she wanted to look like.
“Mhm,” she says, letting herself swing slightly in the breeze of the rain, “I didn’t want to get my hair cut so I just let it grow.” She looks up at me and smiles again, “I think it looks nice, don’t you?”
“I-I think it looks beautiful,” I say, holding back the sob that tried to escape from my lips. My tears fell freely from their springs, working their way through my stubble and down to my jaw where they were dripping down into my lap.
She doesn’t notice, she continues her weaving and gentle swinging. “Do you ever dream Mr. Rory?” she suddenly asks me.
I nod, “Sometimes.”
“What do you dream about?” She asks, her voice is sweet and vibrant; she should have been a singer.
“Sometimes I have nightmares,” I reply honestly, “most of the times I dream of you.”
“What about me?” she asks curiously.
It’s hard now to contain the sobs, I have to pause to keep myself from falling apart in front of her, “I dream about what could have…. What could have been if I had just been faster…. I dream about saving you, telling you truthfully that…. everything was going to be alright… that there was nothing to be scared of. I wanted to imagine you would have grown up to be beautiful, to have a chance to live your life and not be tainted by the cruelty of the world…. I dream of you being happy…. I dream that men like Grice never existed….”
She stops her weaving to look at me with those blue eyes, they seemed to look into my very soul to carefully scrutinize every little fear and trouble I have ever had with innocent and loving care. “You think you failed me… don’t you?” she gently asks me.
I cry, a quick sound of despair and emotion, the tears won’t stop falling even after I close my eyes tightly shut, I nod slowly, “I should have saved you, I should have been better. You were taken and I let it happen…”
I shudder when I feel her soft small hand rest on my arm to comfort me. “You tried your best Mr. Rory.” She said.
It was too much for me, my armor was broken and I felt exposed to the world as I wept. I buried my face in my hands; I couldn’t let her see me like this but not once did that comforting hand on my shoulder leave my side. She let me weep quietly, the only other sound to be heard was the soft patter of distant rain.
I could feel her eyes upon me and I feel compelled to look back into them. I turn away from my tear stained hands to see her smiling sadly to me. “I’m glad I finally got a chance to meet you,” she said sweetly, like an angel comforting a dying man, “I think you’ve spent a really long time feeling sorry for yourself and everything else, haven’t you?”
I couldn’t lie to her; I nodded dumbly and tried to wipe away the tears upon my sleeve.
“You feel like you should be the one that’s dead.” She says.
I can only continue to nod, I know for certain my voice would break if I tried to speak.
“But you never thought about what I wanted for you,” she says sadly.
I turn and looked at her dumbly. I feel my heart shatter from those blue eyes, how selfish I have been all these years that even in my dreams I had never asked her what she wanted from me. I never even took the time to wonder what she would have liked to see me as because I had spent so long in my misery and rage. I took for granted that her single wish would have been to go on living and nothing more, never before had I given thought to what else the murdered little girl could have wanted. How selfish I have been to hide in behind my rage like a child.
She smiles at me, a pleasant and comforting smile that seemed to tell me everything was going to be alright. She looks down at the completed tiara of daisies she had made. It looked perfect, not one stem out of place. I wanted to tell her so but my voice wouldn’t work. I could only watch as she took the ring of daisies and reached over to me. She placed them on my head and adjusted just so I could barely see one of the daisies on top of my ginger locks. She sits back down into her seat on the swings and offers me another warm smile.
“I’d like to see you forgive yourself, even just once. I think you’d be a lot happier if you’d just try,” She said.
Her words cut deep and I felt myself laugh sadly, I look down and see the shining white reflections of my fallen tears upon the grass. “I’m… not dead yet am I?”I ask her.
She smiles and shakes her head, “No… I just thought we should talk Mr. Rory, before you went back to where you belong.”
“I don’t belong there,” I tell her and immediately regret it. I feel shame for contradicting anything she could every tell me. For Blair, this young girl I never rightly knew, I was ready to truly believe it if she had told me the sky was purple instead of blue, for her I would have embraced such an obvious flaw with open arms.
She doesn’t get upset, she doesn’t seem at all sad that I had disputed her. She offers me a comforting smile and I accept it with every fiber of my being, “It doesn’t look like it now, but I think you’ll understand in time.”
We’re stopped by the sound of distant thunder booming across the sky. We both look up towards the whiteness but see only the shining light, “I think it’s time for me to go,” she says with a frown.
I want to beg her to stay. I want to fall to my knees and plead her to remain with me for just a while longer. I don’t think it was possible though, it wasn’t time yet.
“Will I see you again?” I ask.
I grin when she mocks me by humming and pretending to think hard, “Mmmmm I think so, maybe if you keep dreaming you’ll keep seeing me?”
I laugh happily and nod. She goes on and asks me, “Will you give it a try Mr. Rory, I mean to take my advice that is?”
I nod, the tears finally dried upon my face, “For you, anything.”
She grins happily, the gap in her teeth showing proudly, “I’m glad.” She says as another roll of closer thunder is heard.
With that I’m torn away from my simple paradise.
I drowsily open my eyes, half hoping I was back on that swing set but already I could feel the wooden ground of the tree library. I take my first breathes back into the world and wish I had died. The ringing in my ears from that distant thunder still persists into my consciousness; beyond it I can hear talking. My memory comes back to me, of being tricked and ambushed, but I don’t feel angry. All I can feel still is that ethereal calmness that I held in my stupor.
I can hear Twilight Sparkle telling someone “He’s going to be alright, please calm down.” Another regal voice chimes in, “I hadn’t meant to use such force on him but he left me no choice.”
I’m apathetic to what they were saying. I can only mutter her haunting name, “Blair”. Going back to that spot again was all that mattered in my mind at the moment. Not my rage, not my earthly responsibility. Just the calmness of death and the crown of daisies I wore.
A frantic voice and form rushes to me. It was orange. “Did he just say somethin’?! Rorschach are you okay? Please, answer me!” she asks me worriedly.
I try my best to focus on her but my eyes refused to correct themselves, instead of tears staining my face I felt the dried blood cling to my scalp and cheeks. My face was gone, I should be panicking but I’m only calm as I quietly searched for it. I give a sigh of relief when my hands grip into the soft fabric of my face. Inelegantly I place it back where it belonged before answering the orange pony’s still frantic questioning of if I was alright or not.
“Would be better if you weren’t standing on my knee,” I finally say, glad to have the comfort of my face on again, uncaring that my identity had been seen by things that had never seen any human before.
Applejack looks down at her right forehoof and gingerly moves it. “Oh, sorry… you gave us quite a scare there, fella.”
I look around her and see now the others in the room. Princess Celestia and Twilight stood close together, watching my every movement. Nearby the two badly beaten guards I had fought earlier were being treated by a white pony with a red cross on her flank. Hadn’t realized the damage I inflicted, one of the Pegasus’ wings was still jutting at an unnatural angle, he wouldn’t be flying anytime soon.
The princess approaches me; she’s frowning but didn’t seem coarse or disapproving. She stops short of nearly reaching my extended leg and looks at me. “I’m sorry I had to use such force but I couldn’t let you harm my guards. Before you got here I informed them of the potential danger you represented; they were doing only what they felt was right.”
“Hurm, and you?” I ask her harshly. I don’t bother to see her reaction, I look over to Twilight, “I don’t like being deceived.”
She shifts uneasily and looks at the ground sadly. “This wasn't her fault; I told her to bring you here, but instructed her not to tell you for what purpose.” the princess says as she steps in the way of my accusing gaze.
I look to her, my eyes still refuse to focus themselves but I can see her form clearer now, “And what purpose is that?”
“Believe it or not I simply wanted to talk. I was afraid you wouldn’t come if you felt threatened.” She says in her regal and authoritative voice.
I can’t help but look down at my disheveled form and note again the blood caked to my head. “Really now?” I say with more than a hint of sarcasm, as much as I can muster.
Now it is her turn to look embarrassed as she says, “Things did not go as I hoped they would.”
“I heard there was a commotion down in town, that the mayor had asked everyone to stay indoors by the princess’ wish. I came down as quick as I could, had a feelin’ it had something to do with you.” Applejack says, getting my attention. “I found Twilight banging on ‘er own door and I ‘eard the commotion goin’ on inside. I kicked the door in just when you went and hit your head against the shelves tryin’ to get at the princess. What in tarnation were you thinkin’ doin’ something like that?” she angrily asks.
I don’t answer her. I bow my head to her because I can give no right answer. What would I say? That I was hoping to get killed? The sudden image of a young girl’s smiling face assaults my mind. I turn towards the Princess again and speak, “So now I’m subdued. What is it you want to talk about?”
She gives a hard frown and looks around to the ponies assembled, “Everypony, I’d like to speak to the human in private please.” The white Pegasus guards move to protest but she holds out a hoof and stops them, “I will be fine. Please, I would rather this be discussed in private.” She then casts her regal gaze upon Applejack and Twilight, “I promise I will explain everything later.”
Twilight, the nurse, and the two guards file out as they are told and after some hesitation and a nod from me Applejack leaves as well. Now it was only me, a broken man, and the Princess of Equestria.
“So what now,” I asked her.
“First, are you really alright? I hadn’t expected you to charge me so suddenly. I used too much force in trying to restrain you, and for that I am deeply sorry.” I can’t tell if her concern is feigned or not, sounded honest enough but monarchs could be masters of lying.
“I’ll be fine,” I say, slightly annoyed she was asking and also still bothered that I was torn away from Blair Roche.
She ignores my biting attitude and goes on with her questions, “You came a long way just to live in a forest. Why are you here, human?”
“So you know what I am then,” I say instead of answering her question. She doesn’t answer me but waits upon my own. We were both headstrong it seemed; this was going to take a while. “I didn’t have a choice in coming here. In essence I was killed and brought here instead of some afterlife.” I say after the stalemate of silence.
I wasn’t sure if I was expecting the casualness with which she accepted this but when she does I don’t feel the urge to question it. With the authority of a wise monarch she asks “What are your intentions here?”
I shrug like I had been asked if I’d rather have soup or salad before dinner, “I have none. Was expecting you to kill me so that I didn't need to worry about it.”
She looks horrified, the same look she gave when she thought I had been seriously hurt by her, “You…. Wanted me to kill you?”
I smirk at her reaction, “Monarch for thousands of years, and you've never executed someone? Your options were banishment, imprisonment, or atonement. I was hoping to see how far your resolve would go. I’m disappointed, but not surprised.”
Her eyes narrow in suspicion, “So it seems you know about Equestrian history, or more exact my ruling of Equestria.”
“Hurm, wasn’t lying around and lamenting turn of events in life. I have a rough idea of events. Seems I have a slight advantage in my knowledge over you.” I conceitedly say.
“Not as much as an advantage as you might think, human. I am aware of your kind though I haven’t kept my eye on your barbaric race in a long time. It has been many centuries since I last saw one of your kind, back when I first became aware of humans and their ways.”
I tilt my head at this revelation, “So I am not the first to appear am I?” I ask her.
She shakes her head, “No you are not.” Before I can ask about this she continues, “But that is a private matter I will not discuss with you.”
“I wonder what other secrets you keep from your subjects… your majesty.” I scowl. Thoughts of tyranny and conceited rules come to mind, how else does one keep such a harmonic rule over so many citizens? I begin to wonder if Thomas More was right in saying utopia could not exist.
“I only wish to keep them safe, they do not need to know about humans or to know there are places in existence that do not live in harmony.” She replies calmly, ignoring my subtle accusation.
“We share a familiar attitude toward humans then,” I say, “but I think you know more than you let on.”
She looks at me confused, an interesting look with her flowing mane that seemed to be caught by a mysterious wind. “What do you mean?”
I give her my theory but I don’t expect her to understand it but it was for my own sake that I say, “I think it isn’t a coincidence that I ended up here… nor do I think it an accident that I was forced here by an all-powerful being to a place ruled by two similarly powerful beings.”
“I don’t understand what you’re saying-“ she begins but stops when I continue with my rant.
“I once wondered how John is able to perceive all things at once,” I say harshly, “He explained to me that time wasn’t linear and in some cases time went backwards instead of forwards. I thought then, was it so farfetched then that he would wish to play god by creating his own little world someplace?” I scowl as I continue, “He so did enjoy his experiments; I would not be surprised to know he treats his subjects like rats thrown into hot water just to see what they did. I doubt he can hear me though, busy fixing atoms into new elements or changing energy particles into matter. Doesn’t bother to even check on his experiment until the times comes to see its results. Arrogant.”
Princess Celestia looks confused and more than a little bewildered, “You’re insinuating that this all isn’t real?” She shakes her head in pity, “You must be more far gone than I had first suspected...”
“No,” I tell her, “I know this is real. As real as anything can truly be.” I look at the ceiling and continue, “What does it matter though to convince you what I think, that this world is all a recent fabrication working backwards against everything I’ve come to realize as reality. I think you would rather not understand what I know, in this world’s greater existence its origins matter so very little who or what first created.” I can only imagine what the thoroughly confused princess looked like; she no doubt thinks I’ve gone mad. In a way I think I have, but at least I have someone to blame for it. Still looking at the ceiling I call out, “If you can hear me John, where ever you are, I hope you’re satisfied with yourself. You finally became God, finally made use of what little humanity you had left to make your own little harmonic world where no one has any other choice but to live together happily.”
I look back down and smile under my face to see the pity she was looking at me with, “I’m sorry, but you must have truly lost your mind at some point in time to believe something so farfetched. We in Equestria don’t live in harmony because we have to but because we want to, and we know in the end our harmony makes us stronger as a whole. To live any other way seems like madness to me. I could never choose to not love my little ponies no matter any differences we might have. I know where you come from things aren’t the same and for that I pity you, for you are insane.”
The reaction I was expecting from her. When I first learned of Princess Celestia I had suspected her a potential dictator, I realize now I don’t think that was true. I believe now she was compelled to have faith in harmony. She didn’t seem to question it but why would she? Anything other than that seemed insane to her. To her harmony was a fact of nature, like knowing creatures needed to breathe oxygen to live. Let Jon be damned to hell with screwing with free will if he was to blame for this world.
I change the subject, satisfied now that I had stated my theory and had gauged her reaction, “Hopefully that makes me less of a threat to you. That was what you were worried about wasn’t it?”
She notices how I suddenly changed the subject but perhaps she accounted that to my ‘insanity’. She speaks, “It wasn’t myself I was worried about. I was more worried about the potential harm you posed to my little ponies.”
I give a curt laugh, “So Twilight wasn’t entirely lying that her friends were in danger. She just failed to mention I was the danger.”
“I’m afraid so,” the Princess says, failing to catch on to my humor, “but now actually talking to you I still think you are a threat. So far you’ve shown a ferocious aggressiveness, insane beliefs, and an irrational tenacity.”
“Just like any other human I suppose.” I retort.
There is a pause as she thinks about what to say next, finally she goes on, “Yet somehow you’ve come to befriend my little ponies. Applejack especially was worried for your sake. I understand you saved her some days ago.”
“I did.” I say with a confirming nod.
“Then for that I thank you,” and to my surprise she bows before me.
I let the shock fade away for a few seconds before I reply, “I’ll be the first to agree with you that I’m violent. That my beliefs border on the insane, my best quality would be this irrational and dangerous tenacity I cling to. Believe me when I tell you I would never harm any of those ponies. They aren’t human, I couldn’t begin to compare them to humans, but they are more than that. Their protection I think is the only thing keeping me relatively sane instead of convincing myself that I've fallen into disuse. They’re too….”
“Innocent.” She finishes for me with a knowing smile.
I nod. For a moment we are silent until I ask the inevitable question, “So what happens now?”
She smiles and the tension in the room finally begins to dissolve even after my insanity and her smashing me against a wall. “I think that is partly up to you.” She says, “Despite what I have seen and at the request of Twilight and her friend I’m inclined to give you a chance to go about your business without Luna and me watching you.” So it seemed it was not my imagination that the moon was watching me. She continues, “I hope I don’t come to regret this. If I hear even one pony was hurt by you I won’t regret sending you to the sun.” She’s still smiling but I don’t know if she was being serious or joking, probably both.
I can’t help but give a short fit of laughter at the thought of being sent to the sun, I wonder if my head would explode before I burnt up. “Not the death I would hope for.” I say. I laugh again and to my surprise she joins me in the tension relieving laughter. I stop laughing and look to the windows, I smile and say, “It seems we have an audience.”
She looks to the windows to see more than just a few ponies peaking in from the small circular windows of the tree library. I recognize the faces as ponies that lived in Ponyville, I even spotted some of the ponies I’m more familiar with, most specifically Twilight and Applejack but from another higher window I saw Rainbow Dash’s face and ear against one of the higher windows, in another lower window Pinkie Pie was doing the same. Each one was looking in at wonder at us, trying their best to listen in to what was being said. I doubt any of them could hear anything we were saying but the sight alone of their Princess talking to an alien thing was attention grabbing enough.
“So it seems,” she says with one of her trademark regal and knowing smiles, “Shame they won’t hear anything though.”
“So now that I know I’m not about to be banished what is it that you wish to ask of me?” I ask her, pulling my legs up. I rub the back of my head and am surprised to feel no obvious wound. Perhaps the Princess used her magic to stop the bleeding? Did she have that power? How ironic that she could do so where the indestructible man would not. I wonder, what else could these ethereal alicorn beings do that John could not? Besides of course the raising of the sun and the moon, although perhaps the indestructible man could do that as well. No doubt he would cite the illogicality of doing so.
Part of me took comfort in knowing that Dr. Manhattan wasn’t the most powerful being in the universe. No single entity should ever hold that much power besides God himself.
She sits down onto the wooden floor, crossing her forelegs and regarding me with scholarly interest, “Well the last time I heard of human history your kind were in the Renaissance. I’d like to hear what has happened since then. Don’t be afraid to skip any of the darker details, after hearing of the Crusades I doubt anything you say can make me cringe.”
I had to wonder where exactly she got such extensive knowledge. Being the ruler of a faraway dimension she shouldn’t even know that humans exist. She had said she had met humans before but she refused to elaborate. Something personal perhaps? Or the encounter was less than pleasant, my instincts told me that seemed to find this most believable. Where ever man goes he seems to have the tendency to disrupt the previous natural order of things. After all how could they not? It was in man’s blood to survive and conquer.
“Very well. Knowledge is a bit rusty on the topic of world history but will try my best to relate what I remember. After the Renaissance, Europe was placed into a new age of intellectual understanding and science. Eventually lead to second largest advancement in human history, the Industrial Revolution….”
[And here it is, props go out again to AnonyMouse who found the time and a place in his heart to put up with my missing words and my misunderstanding of the difference between breathe and breath (Honest to the lord I had no idea what the difference was until he explained it to me, apparently primary school screwed me over).
He also mentioned something that I thought I'd just address here. Between the book and the movie Rorschach has a difference in age. In the book he is 45 but in the movie he's 32, that's a pretty big difference and I had to decide which I felt was better for the story since I had a choice. In the end I went with the book for his age (though don't expect events to entirely adhere to the book as I take some elements from the movie that I felt was better than the novel). The reason for this is both for the story and an ulterior motive.
For the story I'm sorry to say I don't really see Rorschach... well shipping with any pony and I wanted his age to reflect this, I just don't see it happening.. at all, I know this might dishearten some readers but that doesn't mean he isn't going to have no emotional attachments to anyone else. The point of the story after all is attempting to redeem his broken personality.Now between 32 and 45 physically he is still just as capable as he is albeit with a few kinks in his joints, he didn't suddenly loose all his edge just because the years got to him. Mentally his age reflects also his wisdom, how over the years he's learned more than his share of knowledge from the cold world he lived in.
Now for the ulterior motive.... I'm tired of these young, college aged guys suddenly finding themselves in Equestria.
DON'T GET ME WRONG, just because the protagonist is young is absolutely no reason to discredit the story and most often the sort of cliche is a safe haven to go to so that the author can go on straight to the story rather than dwell too much on the character. Most of the HiE I read and love is still young, college guys ending up in Equestria because I can sort of relate to the guy as I'm in university too and love Little Ponies (still trying to decide if I would actually be okay ending up in Equestria... no idea how strong the Apple Cider is if you understand my meaning.)
Now enough trying to make an excuse for myself, I wanted a new take on the popular human in Equestria deal. Instead of someone who is fit, young, and willing to learn new things about his new world I thought what would the difference be to an older man? Someone who has already concretely formed his impression of what the world is like and how cruel life is, someone who is stubborn in these beliefs and refuses to adjust them even when finding himself in a foreign environment. There are other reasons as well but this is the strongest reason to be had for me.
And in final news I punched my roommate Arthur in the face and I'm worried about the retribution. I think he order a taser off the internet...
Well I don't want to leave on that note so I want to give some thanks to the musical composition that helped me in writing some parts.
The scene with Blair Roche: Rain Excerpt composed by Marty O'Donnell
Put it on a loop and read the scene, that's about what it was written to with a background of rain to it.
- That is all,
'Out of Nothing']
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Hopefully this keeps you bastards busy long enough for me to go prepare for my next biology exam.
Traitor Sparkle
"For the story I'm sorry to say I don't really see Rorschach... well shipping with any pony and I wanted his age to reflect this, I just don't see it happening.. at all" ... shipping =/= sex. the most basic level of shipping is friendship, its building a strong emotional bond. yes that can proceed to deeper levels, but do not confuse those with the whole of the concept.
Hrmhm.
Notice Rorschach somehow gained eloquence in both thoughts and speech.
Suspect influence of Equestria.
Otherwise good chapter.
Appreciated Celestia's approach to humans. Avoided Tyrantlestia mistakes,
put forth differences in pony and human mindsets.
252989
NOPE. Read it, and I want more now!
I like this story, i don't know if i can really get behind Rorschach being so eloquent and clear minded at the same time he's a cold blooded killer, but things are going fine and well done. I just can't stop thinking about how shit is gonna go down when all those dogs he killed show up.
252989 You have three weeks. Three of your human weeks before our patience begins to wear. Study for your "biology exam", and then return to satisfy our lust for your tales. Use your time wisely, author...
AWWWW YEAH MARTIN O'DONNEL!!!
253120 That's just me being mean by instead of saying romance calling it shipping... and for that I am sorry if I offend, yet in reality I regret nothing.
252989
And I'm done. Where's the next one?
Also, Dr. Manhatten created ponies, totally called that back in chapter one.
252989 Ex-Nihilos You got mid-terms too?
Also, love Marty O'Donnell
Jivin' new update, sir. I've been following this story for a while now and I have to say that I quite enjoy it, even though I've never read Watchmen (this, despite the fact that it's resting on one of my home's bookshelves).
The scene between Celestia and Rorschach was . . . interesting. They really do come off as two alien inelegances trying to puzzle things out, from a certain point of view. The fact that humans are at their best (and worst) when in conflict must surely be a crazy thing to wrap Celestia's head around.
253231 I accept your nonappology and counter with a write more now word jockey.
I know exactly what you mean, about the whole high school or college age kids going into Equestria. That means they're cynical idiots, but they somehow have a working knowledge of history, psychology, construction and personal relations, among other more ridiculous things. And they always have no friends, for some reason.
What if some 38 year old guy came from the near future, and actually wasn't angry at the world, and didn't immediately or consistently find reason to stay in ponyville? What if he hated some of the main characters? What if the simple act of being there made his life a miserable continuity of pain and suffering for himself, and unwittingly paired with the bad guys because they promised he would get better?
Yeah, it's sort of a plug for my story. Don't read it, though, renovations and such. But, I think I'm a genius because I brought these things up, and, after reading this, I have certainty that you are as well. Sorry for gushing, but I just.... EEERRRRGGGHHH I had this on my mind for quite some time!
He says he'd never hurt the ponies after he was aiming to kill the guards and probably Twilight for her betrayal. Not that I blame him for fighting back, mind you.
Anyways, I don't really see Rorschach admitting that he has insane beliefs.
Other than that, I really liked this chapter and I look forward to more.
I think there should be a chapter where Rorschach goes out further into the forest and meets and rest of it's inhabitents, such as that 'lion.' And maybe even a hydra. I wouldnt mind seeing how Rorschach would react to being chased by a multi-headed dragon.
This was the first HiE that I have ever read, but it is certainly the best. Props to you author, and like Syn said: three weeks, get it done.
I'll be honest, I've been considering the "Manhattan's construct" idea for a while. Guess we'll just see if it's true or not.
Fashion yourself a rubber, taser-proof vest.
When Arthur tries to tase you, laugh and punch him in the face again.
Great update, I salute you Nihilos.
253337 Rorschach specifically said that he had no intention of hurting Twilight.
But you're absolutely right about the guards.
This fic certainly stands far above any other common HiE fic out there
The scene with Blair Roche... Confound that part, you drive me to cry
Darn it, why do the human's always give into the magic of friendship in these stories ='(
Oh well, of all the people that would eventually have a change of heart, I'd have to say rorschach's just above Hitler... No that would be a weird story....
Great chapter i cant even relate this to many of the HiE that ive come across its a level above most, keep up the great work this is quickly becoming one of my favereted ficts ^^
<.< >.> its two Am Why am i even awake xD......Also good luck with the tazer Ive heard their no walk in the park
253207 da fuck u talkin bout
So joke review in Rorschach style aside, in this chapter his
short, clipped way of speaking and even thinking seems
to have disappeared, and it was fairly jarring. Why the change?
But yes, the Celestia/Rorschach conversation was good - the
difference between species really came out, and I like your take on
Celestia.
BEST DAMN CHAPTER EVER!!!!!
media.comicbookmovie.com/images/users/uploads/5893/1343-watchmen-rorschach-wallpaper-1280x800-customity.jpeg
I realllllly enjoyed this my friend and my only fear is that, while I suppose it is the point of the story, Rorschach will become too soft.
Also, miss sentance fragments. Very Rorschach feel. Felt in character.
Loving it, though I hope rorschach will eventually put celestia in her place and explain that our worlds nature and theirs are very different and hers appears just as insane to us as ours is to theirs.
252989
I think saying bastards is going a bit too far, but this chapter will keep me satisfied, for now
Oh it was splendid, wonderful and awesome, i read it 3 times already and i cant stop reading the conversation between Rorschach and Princess Celestia.
The only thing that i HATE about your fic is the time you take on updating
I NEED MORE, EACH CHAPTER IS BETTER THAN THE LAST ONE 
Why did Celestia bring the dumb guards?
Everypony knows the best guards wait until there is either complete confirmation of a threat or the one they're guarding gives the order.
but I found that the choppy sentences made it draw you in better, it felt very him and... that's actually the way the inside of my head sounds.
It can get hard putting complete statements together on the fly.
But seriously this was awesome, one little thing though. I'm not as big of a fan of Watchmen as most of the others here
Anyway, I know I'm putting a wall of text together but I have to collect my fragmented thought patterns together somehow. A common goal, a truly benevolent leader, lets see how Rorshach puts himself back together.
Dude, I like when the authors don't turn celestia into a evil Dictator. She was create to be good, D=
Well... the Celestia/Rorschach meeting went about as well as expected... niiiiiice inclusion with Blair there, very interesting touch.
I hope your mid-terms go well!
Ex-Nihilos, I found a little 'plot-hole'. When Rorschach wakes up, he clearly states that he is without his face. But after some time, in the conversation with Celly, he 'smiles under his face' without ever stating that he picked it up or anything.
Other than that, I really hope you don't make Rorschach a Gary Stu in his 'quest for self redemption'. Don't let him plunge and bathe into the pool of friendship.
But seeing how the story has progressed so far, I don't doubt your capacity.
*The increase in the chapter's length pleases me as well.
And now, a question: How long (chapter-wise) you plan on making this?
/me goes to my tracking section, read rorschach in equestria new chapter, go back to Rorschach in equestra chapter list, INCOMPLETE,
Warning sir you have made a grave error in saying it's incomplete for 3 weeks, Screw Bio, its worthless anyways. Take calculus or something, and you could have tricked us saying its over. then Gave us all a great surprise by making a new chapter, but seriously i don't think bio is very important, but thats probably because my teacher has no enthusuiasm at all, making it drearaly hard to excell.
Good chapter, just remember we can't be kept waiting for 3 weeks, Or something might happen to you
Very good...
Very good indeed...
MOAR!
Author: I agree about how cliche it is having "Generic Young College Guy In Equestria."
253280 So Rorschach thinks
253529 Darn just the bucket? I was hoping for a bathtub but I guess I'll just have to try harder.
253694
253987
254184
253653
I'll put this in a blog later on though I wonder how many people actually read those with the stupidity I blog about sometimes, so I'll start start by addressing you directly.
There's a reason why I'm making the writing clearer and less fragment, in a way its part of the story. I wanted to show as he spends more time in a 'relatively' safe environment and being around positive moods his mind clears up and he finds his thoughts become calmer. I especially wanted to show this with the encounter with Blair.
So in essence I'm making his writing progressively more fluent, when he finally has his crashes (which he will) the change to his way of thinking suddenly becomes obvious and startling, probably earning him that dark tag in the process.
254184 So no he isn't going to become a Gary Stu, I'm not sure in what regard you're worried he'll become one but in the future he's going to do a great job of doing ALL the wrong things for any sort of redemption, hell he probably isn't even looking for redemption since he doesn't think he's done anything truly wrong except keep people safe... by permanently getting rid of other people.
Don't even get me started on Twilight Sparkle in the future now....
And finally to answer your question chapter wise I do not expect the story too long, barely into the twenties at most and even that is an unrealistic length to me at this point. I can't see how any story should ever last longer than it needs to so basically when the story ends it just will without regards to how many chapters it will take.
I have no problem with Rorschach shipping a little bit with Applejack, BUT this cant evolve further than a purely PLATONIC level!
But then again.... this is just my point of view.
254419 Platonic is as high as it will go and even then its never going to be explicitly said so, you'll just had to decide for yourself if it is or isn't there.
254408 Well don't want to go discrediting these types of stories though. The generic college guy in Equestia is what writers sometimes call a 'safe haven character'. As the reader you already have a general idea of how the character is going to act or what he's going to think. The usual freak out, the gradual acceptance, and then move on. In a way there is an advantage to this method since you already know the character already (or have a good enough idea of him) the writer can just move directly on to the story at hand.
The sad thing is some writers choose not to take advantage of this and would rather continue the template onward to the point of it being stereotypical.
Ohhhhhhh Twilight Sparkle. Such a bad idea, lying to Rorschach. You'll get yours... I PROMISE.
I've no problem with Rorschach expressing himself more completely, it seems clear that he's likely had a great deal of time to think compared to what he usually had on Earth. He's in a world where he's not hounded by the police, not having to spend his nights looking for trouble, (Diamond dogs aside) and while he is busy dealing with survival in the forest, that still leaves a great deal of time to think and really contemplate the world he's in and what it might mean.
As for him and AJ, I think she's going to be as close to him as Nite Owl was. A good friend, Rorschach wouldn't allow himself any deeper connection than that, and really I see him as thinking he doesn't deserve even that much connection to anyone.
Blair was right, he really does need to forgive himself once in a while. Though given how difficult that can be even for those less driven and haunted than Rorschach, I think it'll take a lot for him to actually do so.
Loving this story, looking forward to more.
I can understand what you were doing by making Rorschach speak more fluently, but I think you should have made it more apparent that his speech was changing in the beginning, because I honestly thought Adrian Veidt was talking and it was really jarring to see that it was Rorschach, but maybe that was your intention?
Another thing that bugs me is that Celestia actually knows about humanity. I don't know, but I just thought it would have been more interesting if even she knew nothing of humanity, but I'll wait and see what you do with the revelation. At least the human that she met before Rorschach wasn't a college student, because that would just be boring.
Still, this is what I like to see in crossovers. Character's in interesting situations, while staying in character.
I got so excited when I clicked to the list of tracked stories and saw that RiE had updated. I think that's a sign that this is one of my top fics.
252989
lol my friend. fanfiction writers fail to see that readers are like fat kids sitting at the end of a chocolate conveyor belt. they always want more. but i can suffer the pain of hunger... for now.
"Don’t be afraid to skip any of the darker details, after hearing of the Crusades I doubt anything you say can make me cringe.”
Just goes to show that even if you are a Godlike being, you can tempt fate...
I don't know if I prefer your journal / Rorschach narrative style or this "tipical" style. Anyways, I look forward to your next update.
some will be mad at me and some will probably agree when i say...
Celestia is a huge BITCH sometimes.....
Wow, great plan Princess. Surprised the guards have still got everything attached.
Read this on my phone last night at the bar and almost lost it during the Blair scene. Thanks a lot.