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Bullets

Joined January 2012
11 followers

Just being a bullet.

I write whatever comes into my head as I go along. Who knows where my story could go next? I don't.

The title and chapter titles of Elysian Fields are all songs. I like to think that they represent the content of each chapter and the story accordingly.

Quality over quantity. Shorter, well-written chapters are better than long, 'spammy' ones. Paint the literary canvas, don't throw paint at it.

New Octavia one-shot coming soon.

Stories (1)

  • Elysian Fields
    The Hearth's Warming tale does not explain all. What are the dark secrets that it does not tell?

    20,971 words · 3,027 views · 30 likes · 2 dislikes

Blog Posts (9)


The Hearth's Warming story tells the tale of how Equestria came to be. It does not however tell of the dark secrets that followed. Find out about the true history, and dark secrets of Equestria's forgotten past.

Picture art thanks to:

http://aeronjvl.deviantart.com  - Awesome artist. Go check his stuff out! :)

First Published
30th Jan 2012
Last Modified
31st Mar 2012

Comments ( 31 )

#1 · Chapter 2 · 133w, 3d ago · · ·

Congratulations on EqD approval, Zuriel! Expect your views to skyrocket.

~Hato F.

#2 · Chapter 2 · 133w, 3d ago · · ·

>>175155

Thanks a lot, Hato! :twilightsmile:

#3 · Chapter 2 · 133w, 3d ago · · ·

This is named after a Megadeth song, isn't it?

\m/

#4 · Chapter 1 · 133w, 3d ago · · ·

seams interesting, i like your historical take in this, can't wait to read more.

#5 · Chapter 2 · 133w, 3d ago · · ·

>>176807

Yep.  \m/

#6 · Chapter 2 · 133w, 2d ago · · ·

>>176807 sorry, but it's Dragonforce >>177658

#7 · Chapter 2 · 133w, 1d ago · · ·

>>180157

The story itself, and each chapter will have a song as the title. They wont all be Megadeth, but yes, chapter one is DragonForce. I can say now that chapter two will be named after another Megadeth song. :eeyup:

#8 · Chapter 2 · 133w, 1d ago · · ·

Oho very well done, I'm enjoying this quite alot, can't wait to read more :twilightsmile:

#9 · Chapter 1 · 133w, 21h ago · · ·

When I first saw your story I panicked but I see now that yours takes a different plot to how mine will be. I will continue to watch this to make sure I don’t poach on your originality. :scootangel:

#10 · Chapter 2 · 133w, 20h ago · · ·

Very good, I like it so far. I will continue to make sure my story doesnt take anything from yours. :pinkiehappy:

#11 · Chapter 2 · 133w, 20h ago · · ·
#12 · Chapter 2 · 133w, 17h ago · · ·

No problem! :twilightsmile:

#13 · Chapter 3 · 132w, 5d ago · · ·

Celestia and Luna seem a little clueless in this. :facehoof: I hope they get redeemed at some point. Still, I'm interested to see where this is going.

#14 · Chapter 3 · 132w, 4d ago · · ·

...... Why is Luna and Celestia even in here? They have enough magic by themselves to lay waste to the entire opposing armies, killing them or not if they choose to. I would understand with just the 3 normal races. But the other 2 are really trying to become the top race... With 2 goddesses that are a combo of all the races in harmony being around?! It just doesn't make sense, The princesses are harmony of the races in flesh and blood! Also what >>189749 said. Celestia is more publicly loved celebrity ruler. Luna would be the war monger that went around conquering enemies, not Tia. Tia would be alittle clueless and back in the castle with all the paper work, but Luna would be out in the frontlines with the army...

Ok, my little ranting over. I'll still read it, simply cause I have ready pretty much every other story I am following. But still think it needs to be more thought out.

#15 · Chapter 3 · 132w, 4d ago · · ·

>>189749>>193225

I was planning on addressing these points over the next couple of chapters anyway. The first couple of chapters were to 'set up' the storyline/events, but from now on Celestia and Luna will have more major roles in the story. Thanks for the feedback.

#16 · Chapter 4 · 129w, 4d ago · · ·

At last! :rainbowkiss:

I thought you had forgotten about updating. It's been so long. :moustache:

#17 · Chapter 4 · 129w, 4d ago · · ·

>>269915

Heh, sorry. It's been in a review queue for a while now and it has only been reviewed once so far. I've got part 4 done too which will be sent of for reviewing in a day or two. :twilightsheepish:

#18 · Chapter 4 · 129w, 3d ago · · ·

>>269918 *shakes franticly* Moar! MOAR!! :flutterrage:

#19 · Chapter 2 · 129w, 11h ago · · ·

Nice starting. I'm curious now ! :ajsmug:

A little repetition here, though :

He too, longed to hear the cries of the of the enemy as he enacted his vengeance upon them.

#20 · Chapter 4 · 128w, 6d ago · · ·

>>282337

Thanks for pointing that out. I'll change it now. :twilightsmile:

#21 · Chapter 4 · 128w, 4d ago · · ·

I love where this is going. I hope your Luna won't be disappointing ! :twilightangry2:

Hope for more ! :pinkiehappy:

#22 · Chapter 4 · 127w, 6d ago · · ·

This is pretty solid. Here's to hoping that the rest of the story matches what's already written.

#23 · Chapter 5 · 124w, 6d ago · · ·

Pretty vicious battle sequences you have here. Well done!

#24 · Chapter 5 · 124w, 5d ago · · ·

I'm glad this story updated.  Anyways, there was an epic battle that required epic music.  So I put on some music from the Lord of the Rings: Return of the King soundtrack and it made the story that much better! :pinkiehappy:

Keep up the great work and I can't wait for the next chapter.  

#25 · Chapter 5 · 124w, 1d ago · · ·

No prisoners eh ? They ought to read Sun Tzu sometime... :twilightsmile:

Pretty awesome chapter ! I must admit I was expecting all the time that Luna would be beaten there, but they handled this battle well.

I love Thunder escape too. Focusing on the present, it was all he can do. Perfectly done !

#26 · Chapter 5 · 124w, 1d ago · · ·

In those last couple of para's, Skyfrost says "kill him with my bare hands"

Ponies don't have hands - they have hooves.

Also, that section about the nameless pony who dies, becoming one of the nameless dead and all that forgotten in time stuff really broke up the flow of that whole section. Could probably read without. A general rule I use when writing is: "How does this contribute to the story as a whole?" If you can't think of a good reason, consider revising that section or even removing it altogether. For every 10 paragraphs I write, I'll have to completely revise at least 1 or 2.

These were the only things that really irked me. Not fond of criticising - only when I have to.

Enjoying this alternate history,

Frostwyrm

#27 · Chapter 5 · 124w, 21h ago · · ·

>>415553

Thanks for pointing out the mistake and for the tip. I've made the changes you suggested and it does flow better now that it has been cut down. Feel free to point out any more errors or things that would work better when changed. Every little helps. :pinkiesmile:

#28 · Chapter 5 · 113w, 3d ago · · ·

I love how a great deal of these songs have the same names as numerous metal/rock songs (Battery - Metallica? Dawn Patrol - Megadeth?  Decadence - Disturbed?) kinda interesting if that was intended :twilightsheepish:

And this story is amazing, too!

#29 · Chapter 1 · 84w, 4d ago · · ·

Time travel?

?

??

????

????????

????????????????

#30 · Chapter 2 · 84w, 4d ago · · ·

Yeah, I didn't think I was being serious with that "time travel" comment.

And I found it amusing to imagine a pony with a cutie mark that is presumably a symbol of the Royal Equestrian Alliance or whatever you want to call it trying to defect to one of the rebel armies (never mind that he's an earth pony).

#31 · Chapter 5 · 71w, 13h ago · · ·

Will Discord be appearing, or at least be mentioned, in this fanfic?

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