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  • T Pony Verse: A Collaborative Collection of Pony Poetry

    A wide-ranging anthology of verse from nine of FIMFiction's top poets.
    8,439 words · 1,528 views  ·  181  ·  1
  • E A Single Step

    Twilight accidentally steps on a snail. This makes her sad. As the years go on, several other things happen.
    5,797 words · 4,251 views  ·  577  ·  18
  • T What You Can Imagine

    A Pony's deepest desires brought to life aren't always what they expect.
    9,921 words · 3,862 views  ·  207  ·  7
  • T Brevity

    A gesture of appreciation — a song-story from another world — a sudden revelation — a dark time in youth — the sweet sadness of the snow: five short stories about ponos, and the things that happen to them.
    11,420 words · 692 views  ·  91  ·  2
  • T Moonlight

    Fluttershy meets Luna by moonlight, and finds the night more beautiful than she ever imagined.
    8,341 words · 2,381 views  ·  160  ·  6
  • T Pieces of a Grey Cloud

    A series of moments from Derpy's life.
    6,132 words · 3,938 views  ·  401  ·  23 · gore
  • T Unfamiliar Skin

    I've arrived. I can only faintly hear the hive. Mother's voice is gone from my ears. But I know I have a purpose—I just can't remember what it is.
    6,246 words · 1,918 views  ·  258  ·  13
  • E As the Days Go

    Pinkie Pie and Twilight Sparkle have a house by the shore together. Many years have gone by. Sometimes, every day is hard.
    3,552 words · 3,479 views  ·  284  ·  18

Blog Posts52

  • 62w, 3d
    to whom it may concern (apology)

    it's no secret that i'm a completely stuck up asshole.

    wait, let me start over.

    it's no secret that i take writing—including fanfiction especially—way too seriously. for most people, writing words about cartoon horses is a hobby, a minor creative outlet, a way to have fun. to me, it's been a way of life. i guess that's the side effect of making it my sole means of creativity for a while.

    as such, it's not uncommon that i've espoused a volatile opinion here or there, or said something that stepped on someone's toes in some way or another. i don't mean to imply any inflated sense of worth or importance on myself here—but people have gotten mad at me for various reasons, i've gotten mad at them for just as many, and there have been times where fanfiction, something that's supposed to be wonderful and cheerful, has been miserable.

    one of those instances (or several of them, really) has been in regards to 'riffing'. i have to say, as i've said before, that i don't have anything inherently against the concept of a 'riff'—in the same way that i can look at something dumb on the internet or tv and laugh at it with friends, i think sharing in the communal mockery of something in good spirits can be fun. i've never really enjoyed Mystery Science Theater 3000, or Rifftracks, but i understand why people would, and am ready to accept they're just not for me.

    what i have a problem with, however, are riffs that constitute little more than personal attacks, or even just reductive, repeated commentary about quality. when people riff something, the idea is to make jokes about the content; references, allusions, or taking the absurd qualities of the content and using them as a launching point for observations. it's not to relentlessly mock the perceived quality of something. watching a movie and saying 'holy cow this is shitty' isn't funny—it's just simple-minded and uninteresting, and the same can be said of writing. that's why i had a problem when reading 'riffs' on some of my stories; repeated things like 'wow look at these big words this guy sure is full of himself', mocking the quality of the writing, word-choice, sentence structure—all of those things should be separate from the premise, which is kind of the point of making fun of something in that way. i don't feel like people 'got it'.

    that said, this isn't me giving a dissertation on what comedy is. it's meant to be an apology. for as much as i can say i have justifiable reason to have lashed out at the people who have 'riffed' my stuff in the past, i don't want to hold a grudge anymore. i feel like a creator lashing out because of a perceived insult against themselves or their work is a lot more justifiable than personal attacks over a perceived grandiloquence—but that's not really the issue.

    i want to say i'm sorry. i take myself too seriously. i take writing, and especially fanfiction, too seriously. i don't want to harbour any ill will to people who were using my stories as a vessel to have fun, or to make other people laugh. while i fully believe my reactions were not entirely unreasonable, the extent to which i construed mockings of my work as a personal attack is not acceptable. while things turned into legitimate personal attacks later, i feel if i had started out on the right foot and not blown up by being overly sensitive in the first place, things would have gone much better in the long run.

    to that end: people reading this who i've pissed off in this fashion—i'm sorry. consider this a wholesale apology. i'd like very much to bury the hatchet and go to bed knowing i'm bowing my head and wishing to make amends to anyone i've wronged in this fashion.

    if there are any people from this group that i have blocked, please find some way to let me know and i will be happy to unblock you. please take full license to make fun of my stories as much as you want in whatever fashion, though again i will say that i feel the difference between mocking the content and mocking the author is what makes a good joke.

    if you're unwilling to accept my apology, i understand, but would like to extend it regardless.

    and, to anyone who has no idea what the fuck i'm talking about, is wondering why i'm not posting more porn, or who just wants me to shut up—sorry to you guys too. i'll stop typing here.

    43 comments · 2,366 views
  • 63w, 5d

    i lied


    26 comments · 1,051 views
  • 64w, 2d
    not with a bang, but a whimper

    i'm back

    (sort of)

    expect horseporn in a couple days

    also possibly other things.

    after that, i dunno.

    22 comments · 967 views
  • 65w, 6d
    i heard you like anthrobloom (shameless horsesex promotion)

    i haven't made a blog post in a while because i'm dead inside but i don't feel like talking about that right now

    IBP posted a new story just now that i'd like to pimp because i edited a good chunk of it. i forgot to give it a final oversight, but it had made some major progress last i checked, and even though i hate anthro, it involves a naked Applebloom getting filled with a million dicks, which is okay in my book.

    go check it out if you need something to sate your masturbatory longing without me actually writing anything. IBP's a good kid. he needs your vote to become president of the horsepornography republic. stay staunch, comrades.

    4 comments · 814 views
  • 67w, 5d
    PFV Interview and some housekeeping

    howdy all

    as seems to be the custom when these things happen, i'm obligated by ethereal demand to say that A Single Step was posted to the Ponyfiction Vault. you can click on that linky thing to read my interview, super-extra-special-early edition—and of course, next week, the one that everyone will see will go up on fimmyfics proper.


    i'd always kind of hoped or dreamed that something i'd write would get the nebulous honor of some guy saying 'this is pretty good'. like all goals in life, i have to say the euphoria that came with it was kind of fleeting—but, that being said, it makes me sort of happy when i think about it, if for nothing more than saying that i've contributed something worthwhile to a community i care about.


    Bad Horse wrote this blog thing about 'Why we write?' for One Man's Pony Ramblings. he originally asked for my help putting the post together, but scrapped the stuff i came up with when it wasn't easy to fit it cohesively with his own writing; i don't know if i'll get permission to post my own essay on the same topic, or what. in any case, it's a subject i thought was worth discussing, and Bad Horse is a cool dude who says neat things. so go check it out, if you feel like it. if i get the okay, i may share parts of my version later.

    lastly, my favorite ponyfiction author in the world AP wrote a story about... well, it's pretty obvious. it made me really upset to read but that's good because life is a process, and if we run from the things that upset us we'll never overcome them. i can't say it was as impactful as Pink, Blue, and Ivory, but i think it's a meaningful story that people should read anyway. herein lies the link

    to anyone wondering about new stories: i'm having a bit of a rough spot. life is really tough and shitty right now and honestly i feel like my stomach is eating me from the inside out. i've gotten scraps and half-finished drafts of about five or six stories right now (mostly porn), but can't convince myself to finish any of them. i dunno how long this new block'll last, or what will make it go away, but i promise i'll try hard to put out some new content when i can get over my shitt feelings.

    thanks everyone for reading, as usual.

    catch you on the flip side.

    13 comments · 485 views
  • ...
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#1 · 89w, 2h ago · 37 · 32 ·

This was awesome!

The only thing that would've made the cum-vomiting scene hotter was if she vomited into a bucket and was later held down and forced to drink her own vomit.

I can't wait for the sequel where Pinkie Pie finds out that she's pregnant and names her child Centurion. :pinkiehappy:

Then the whole story become a constant string of paternity tests to find out which stallion is the father.

#2 · 88w, 3d ago · · ·

not sure if read...

#3 · 88w, 3d ago · 11 · 19 ·

Gross! What kind of sick author would write a clop with Pinkie Pie in it. Just sick man... sick.

#4 · 88w, 3d ago · 3 · 1 ·

i have a hard time believing that many people have read this story and disliked it already

but, that said... that title is kind of asking for it.

my bad

#5 · 88w, 3d ago · 3 · 1 ·

>>2260634 Nah, we've already seen one Mama Mia! in our lifetime...

#6 · 88w, 3d ago · · ·


#8 · 88w, 3d ago · 29 · ·

You're just trying to prove or disprove if anything you write will get in the feature box, aren't you?:ajbemused:

#9 · 88w, 3d ago · 18 · ·

One hundred dicks? That's as many as ten tens! And that's terrible.

#10 · 88w, 3d ago · · 1 ·

Oh god... so sad... yet so hot... :pinkiesad2:

#11 · 88w, 3d ago · · ·


pretty sure this one's not getting featured, brochacho

#12 · 88w, 3d ago · · ·


We must compile the data. And determine what this means for the fandom.

#13 · 88w, 3d ago · · ·


Sometimes I think you operate purely on estrogen.

#14 · 88w, 3d ago · 7 · 2 ·

I have a habit of glancing at comments before reading porn. Phrases like "cum vomiting" mean I will continue this habit. It is useful. Passing on this one, I think.

#15 · 88w, 3d ago · 3 · ·



#16 · 88w, 3d ago · 4 · ·

That was beautiful.

#18 · 88w, 3d ago · 6 · ·

Um. Well.


It certainly merits the Dark tag, I'll tell you that.

I'm giving you a thumbs up for writing quality. Very realistically disturbing.

#19 · 88w, 3d ago · 8 · ·

The story is like a slow-motion train crash. Can't avert eyes.

#20 · 88w, 3d ago · 23 · 1 ·

Still say you should have titled it Smile, Smile, Smi—GLK!!


#21 · 88w, 3d ago · 10 · ·

That was more of rape towards the end there, Darf... I'm concerned for you.

#22 · 88w, 3d ago · 12 · ·

I quit.

#23 · 88w, 3d ago · · 1 ·

Wow.  Im impressed.  (i think the only reason for all the dislikes is that noone will get past 5 without finishing. :rainbowlaugh:

Oh well, i liked it:pinkiegasp: as did pinkie.  So faved:heart:

#24 · 88w, 3d ago · · ·

This was... Interesting... And insane. Criminally so...

Ok, wow.

Like, wow. I fear for your sanity Darf xD

As I've said numerous times, never stop!

#25 · 88w, 3d ago · · ·

*opens chapter*


#26 · 88w, 3d ago · · ·

>>2275403 :rainbowlaugh: I wanna know who downvoted, just so I can shake their hand. :rainbowkiss:

#27 · 88w, 3d ago · 6 · ·

Just praying that Pinkie is alright after all the mess... :facehoof:

#29 · 88w, 3d ago · 7 · ·

There is one quote I have for this story.

"Things that make you go... Buhuh!." Ron White


#30 · 88w, 3d ago · 3 · ·

That sure was um... something.:applejackunsure:

#31 · 88w, 3d ago · · 1 ·


Your avatar is very fitting here.

Disliking this solely on the basis of rape, sorry Darf. It was well written, but...

#32 · 88w, 3d ago · 4 · 1 ·

One of these days I should just scrape together a bunch of your stories and riff the everloving piss out of them. The Lyra fleshlight one, the futa Twilicorn one, probably this one... there's enough snark bait to last a lifetime.

#33 · 88w, 3d ago · · ·


#34 · 88w, 3d ago · · ·

This in many ways was just horrid. Lol Almost couldn't finish it.:pinkiesick::pinkiesick:

#35 · 88w, 3d ago · 1 · ·

Well... certainly well written, it gave me a boner up to.... the vomitting part, after that, it went limp without a chance...:twilightoops:

#36 · 88w, 3d ago · · ·


What kind of sick author would write a clop with Pinkie Pie in it.

First off, that's a question, and needs a question mark at the end. :duck:

Second, gee, I don't know, maybe someone like this person?

#37 · 88w, 3d ago · 7 · ·

With a title like that, I clicked through half-expecting some lazy generic clop schlock. You know, the type of story where the lead is just an unearthly nympho and can suck infinite quantities of dick without tiring. Instead you gave us the complete opposite of that, and the results are first sexy, then disturbing, and then just goddamn sad. Which probably mirrors the career arcs of a lot of porn stars.

You keep Pinkie completely in character throughout the story, even when she's chocking half to death on countless horse dongs. And you do a great job conveying the visceral factors at play here: when Pinkie throws up, you make goddamn sure to convey just how nasty the whole experience is, and how helpless she feels as the colts just keep fucking her. Pinkie's attitude at the end is a little heartbreaking. :pinkiesad2: It also leaves me morbidly curious to see how she would react if this experience did leave her "preggo in the eggo."

I think the colts may have been written as a bit TOO mindless and uncaring, and AJ is too irresponsible here. I could see Dash abandoning her post like that, but I think hard-working, dependable Applejack would have stuck around and just asked Rainbow to bring her back a cone. Still, fine work. The title alone will probably ensure it gets feature boxed.

#39 · 88w, 3d ago · · ·

Bit dark for my tastes, but still still up to high as hell standards writing wise. I'm sure those who like the darker fics will enjoy it

#40 · 88w, 3d ago · · ·

Well that's just sad. I'm expecting Sorren in the comment section. Guess not, or maybe later.

#41 · 88w, 3d ago · 9 · ·

I read the title, then i read the "Dark" tag. There was just no way.

But there is. There is a way.

However, this is not romance. I disagree with the "Romance" tag.

Comment posted by BIGNICK deleted at 11:46pm on the 16th of March, 2013
#43 · 88w, 3d ago · · ·

> Implying Pinkie couldn't handle 100 52"-73" bulging pony cocks.

I call horse cock. Pinkie can take'em all and STILL ask for extra whip cream *and* a cherry to top off her 101st!


#44 · 88w, 3d ago · 5 · ·

This is exactly what happend to me when i read this

#45 · 88w, 3d ago · 1 · ·

>>2276136 I'm waiting for Regidar.

#46 · 88w, 3d ago · · ·


I love you for this.

#47 · 88w, 3d ago · · 1 ·

Commence read.

Alright then.

#48 · 88w, 3d ago · 18 · 1 ·


I actually ridiculously endorse this story.


Because it sums up why I absolutely loathe clop for the sake of clop, and hollow pornography.

This story leaves you feeling sick to your stomach about mindless horniness, about inconsideration for Pinkie Pie, who only wanted to make people happy, it makes you feel sick for enjoying the story at first if- unlike me- you hadn't worked out what godawful mess was about to happen.

I love this because it makes people think about why they like stuff like this, particularly the start, because of-

I don't know. I feel like you've just tricked people into a lecture about respecting the emotions and motives behind sex, as opposed to just the physical sensation of it, I feel you hammered this point home with the trying-to-be-selfless pony and I can honestly say that as soon as Pinkie started showing signs of distress, way before she puked, I would have kicked some fucking ass, and I'm proud of saying that. It was as soon as she started feeling overwhelmed that I mentally inserted myself into the story with an automatic ball-kicker, but I knew rescue wouldn't come because there was too much of a majority trying to cum.

Wonderful psychological display here, absolutely stupendous, and I hope nobody came here to genuinely get off. You poor bastards.

#49 · 88w, 3d ago · · ·


More people who like this story will like it for the shock,  or the gross out,  or the bad feels, or the sex, or the dubcon or they hate Pinkie than for the statement you can appreciate it for.

And most people of the mindset to appreciate the statement will avoid the story simply because it exists.

#50 · 88w, 3d ago · 6 · ·

Awesome, a new story by Darf! Pinkie Pie Sucks A Hundred Dicks? This is going to rock, woohoo!

>reads story

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