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68w, 1dHuman in Equestria
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Author's note: Sorry about the delay! Stuff has been hectic to say the least. Big shout out to FrostBite for editing this chapter!
“OK, OK... I’ll explain everything.” *ahem* “Welcome to Ponyology 101.” I reached down and opened my messenger bag to pull out my laptop. “For your viewing pleasure, please gather round so that I may illustrate my points with a mixed media presentation.”
I doubted they caught the meaning of what I said, but they soon crowded around me so they could see the ‘mystical device’ in my lap. I silently chuckled at their mystified expressions as I opened it and tapped the power button. They emitted a collective gasp when the Dell boot up screen popped up. A few moments later, the Ubuntu log in screen popped up.
If you have no clue what Ubuntu is, allow me to do a quick explanation. I have two operating systems (OS’s) on my laptop: Windows 7 and Ubuntu, which is a Linux based OS. Ubuntu runs much faster and is great for general use, but very few games run on it. That is why I also have Windows. OK, now that your mind is filled with new knowledge, go brag to your friends as the story progresses.
My fingers danced across the keyboard faster than the eye could follow as I input my password (No! I’m not telling you what it is).
FrostBite: Psst... it’s Rainbow Dash. Allons~y!
Perhaps modding my laptop to play that jingle that plays in Zelda when you unlock a door when I log in, wasn’t such a good idea. Fang Hua and Alkaios nearly gave my laptop a few new ventilation holes... On a side note, Fang Hua uses these weird circular blades, kinda like Indian chakrams (circular throwing blades; think frisbees of death, but with one spot wrapped with a grip).
“Whoa whoa! Cool your jets! It’s not going to hurt you. It just plays that sound when I log in.” I don’t know what I would do if they killed my laptop. That laptop has everything. So many forms of media on that little device.
They sat back down, but Alkaios now had a deep frown on his face. On the other hand, Fang Hua and Annabeth looked on with deep curiosity. I started opening up a few folders so could show them some video clips to go along with my explanation, but the level of concentration was dropping alarmingly by questions like, “How does that work? What does THIS button do? What’s Amnesia: Dark Descent? What are ‘Youtube Poop’ videos?” I had to ignore them at-least for now. I don’t think I ever plan on showing them what Amnesia is.... too many nights stuck awake, trembling in fear...
“OK,” I was finally ready, “We are in the mythical land of Equestria. It is mainly populated by three types of ponies: Unicorns, Pegasi, and Earth Ponies. Unicorns can use and excel in magic, and Pegasi can fly. The Pegasi’s main role is to control and maintain the weather. Earth Ponies are very strong and some people think they have plant based magic. It hasn’t been confirmed yet so there’s no need to discuss it. Anywho, this land is based around friendship, trust, and love. There is a song I would like to show you that will sum up the basis of this civilization as well as introduce you to several of the ponies that we are about to meet.”
My fellow humans watched in awe and confusion. I hummed along and noticed the pegasi pulling the carriage glancing over their shoulders with befuddled looks on their faces. I wonder what’s going through their minds...
Well, the song’s over now, time to continue my deliriously sick-nasty monologue...
Twilight was rereading the Daring-Do series again. Dash’s recent... debacle surrounding her love of reading had reignited Twilight’s own interest in the adventurous Pegasus. She heard a belch from downstairs followed be scaly feet scurrying up the stairs. Spike barged into Twilight’s room waving a letter, “Twilight! Princess Celestia just sent this urgent message for you!”
Twilight quickly levitated a bookmark into her current page and pulled over the letter. Her eyes scanned the letter once, then twice. She took a deep breath and said, “Spike, we need to gather the Elements of Harmony right now. There are some... visitors who will be coming to Ponyville, and we have been charged with taking care of them.”
“What? How is that an urgent message?” Spike scratched his head.
“I’m not sure, but if the Princess wants us to take care of them, then we will do our best!” Twilight’s eyes gleamed, visualizing Princess Celestia smiling down at her, complimenting her over her latest success.
She sat there for a moment, lost in her fantasy, until Spike spoke up, “Ummm Twilight, perhaps we had better get everypony together before fantasizing?”
“So do you get it now? We are all from different points in history, with myself as the farthest in your future.” I had been explaining, and re-explaining this for ages now. I had Google Earth pulled up so I could show them where we had each come from. Alkaios had finally stopped pouting and I had to repeatedly stop him from touching the screen. I’d never have thought that a Spartan would pout this much. I mean, yeah 300 of his friends had died including his king and he was now in a land he had never heard of, but still. Gotta cheer him up... hmmmm.... DUB STEP. That always cheers me up. Just gotta find the right song... yes... PONY DUBSTEP!!! or as it is known by some bronies, DUBTROT!
The carriage lurched from side to side. “Sweet Celestia’s mane!!! What is that racket?!?!” Hmm... it would appear that the royal guards pulling the chariot did not agree with my choice of music. Alkaios, Annabeth, and Fang Hua were covering their ears. Well, I suppose dubstep might not be the best way to introduce them to modern music. Darn.
*pause*
“I take it that you don’t care for dubstep then?” I smiled sheepishly.
“NO!!!” They all yelled in unison. Philistines...
Before I could show them more amazing music (I was thinking Metallica next...), the carriage landed with a slight bump. I looked outside to see the familiar shape of the Ponyville library. HECK YES! I’m in Ponyville!!! The door opened up (magic?) and we piled out into Celestia’s sun. I looked around, hoping to see a background pony or two, but the carriage effectively shielded the rest of Ponyville from seeing us. Probably for the best.
“Is that a building in a tree?” Annabeth shook her head in disbelief.
“Actually the building IS a tree.” I grinned at her. She rolled her eyes and we started towards the door. I stopped in front of the small door, took a deep breath, and reached out to knock...
“Alright girls, these are special guests of the Princess, so we have to make a good impression.” Twilight was lecturing again for the umpthteenth time. They silently thanked Celestia when they had heard the carriage land outside.
“Ugh, OK! We got it the FIRST time you told us!” Rainbow threw her hooves up in disgust. This was getting really boring. Twilight grinned sheepishly.
“Ah wonder why the Princess didn’t mention anythin ‘bout these here ‘visitors’ in her letter?” Applejack wondered aloud.
“They must be very important Ponies if they know the Princess. I do wish you had given me a greater warning in advance to freshen up a bit more.” Rarity pouted.
“I hope they like parties! I don’t think I’ve ever gotten to throw a party for 4 new ponies at once! This will be so GREAT!” Pinkie Pie bounced up and down with excess energy.
They were interrupted with a resounding knock. The group of mares took a collective deep breath, and Rarity smoothed a stray hair back into her mane. Twilight opened the door with her magic.
Twilight and the other mares stared in confusion at the being beyond the door. It was not a pony, that much was certain, but what WAS it? The thing stood on two legs and appeared to be totally covered in clothes. Rarity in particular noted the stylish coat that it was wearing. However the creature was so tall, about a third of it's body was hidden above the door frame. It stooped down and said in a deep voice, "Why hello to you, too." A grin spread across it's face that rivaled even Pinkie's widest of grins.
It looked sort of like a Diamond dog, but it’s legs were much longer, and it didn’t appear to have any fur except for the top of it’s head. It’s hands had very long and dexterous looking fingers.
The creature bent over to fit through the door and there was ANOTHER of these strange creatures behind the first. The new one was clothed in rugged khaki clothes, but it was clearly female. It had a much... curvier body and carried itself with much more grace. The next of the "visitors" came through the door. Twilight noticed that Fluttershy cringed as the second male came in. He reeked of blood and metal, and numerous scars could be seen beneath his armor. He was scowling fiercely at the ponies, of course Rainbow and Applejack scowled right back at him. The final one came in right behind the grumpy male, and she exuded so much grace, it seemed that everypony else had been tripping over their own hooves just by standing. She was clothed in beautiful brocades and sashes. Rarity nearly started drooling when she appeared.
By now, Twilight's attention had returned back to the tallest of the group. He seemed to be trying to keep himself from laughing with out much success and every now and then a small chuckle escaped from his lips.
"I think the Princess has some explaining to do..." Twilight muttered. She spoke up, "Hello, my name is Twilight Sparkle and these are my friends,” she pointed to each one in turn. “Applejack,”
“Howdy, it’s- er real nice to, um, meet y’all.” She tipped her hat.
“Rainbow Dash,”
“Sup.”
“Rarity,”
“A pleasure.” Rarity sounded flustered.
“Fluttershy,”
*squeak* Fluttershy couldn’t even manage words, she was so nervous.
“and Pinkie Pie."
“Hi!” Twilight waited for more, but nothing else was said by the pink pony. Twilight blinked a few times in surprise. The tall one seemed surprised at Pinkie’s brevity as well.
The tall one cleared his throat, and his grin grew even wider. "It is a delight to finally meet you. My name is Isaac Noe, but please just call me Isaac. These are my...” he paused, seeming to search for the right word. “friends, for lack of a better term.”
The curvy female introduced herself, “I am Annabeth Edgeworth.” She had a curious accent.
The armored one grunted, “Alkaios.” He didn’t seem too happy to be here.
The graceful female quietly stated, “I am Fang Hua. It is an honor to meet you all.” She did a little bow.
Isaac picked up the conversation, “Now then, I’m sure that you all have plenty of questions, but before we start down that path, might I have one request?” The ponies nodded, slightly hesitant. “OK,” he took a deep breath, “Can I hug Pinkie Pie?”
“YAY! HUGS!” Pinkie Pie made to tackle the tall creature, but before she could jump, he scooped HER up!
HOLY CRAP I’M HUGGING PINKIE PIE!!! She doesn’t smell like cotton candy, like everyone thinks. She actually smells more like strawberry cake frosting.... mmhhmmmmmm.... cake.
Everyone else was now staring at us. I grinned my biggest grin. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that.”
Pinkie giggled, “Hee hee I think you and I will get along fine, Isaac!”
Twilight was the first to regain her composure. “Umm... if I might interrupt your hugging session, perhaps you could explain a few things for us.”
“Yeah! Like what you things ARE!” Rainbow had all the tact of a enraged rhino in a china shop.
“We are men, and I do not like your tone.” Alkaios growled. Oh crap, his hand was on his sword...
“Whoa there dude, she didn’t mean anything by it. She’s just naturally... um... enthusiastic.” I tried to calm him down with a few hand motions. Unfortunately, this caused Pinkie to slide to the floor. Awww, I miss the hugs already. I am determined to get one from Fluttershy, but she is still cowering right now. Though that squeak she did earlier nearly caused me to die from overexposure of cute.
“Rainbow can be a bit brash at times, but she didn’t mean to offend, Mr. Alkaios.” Rarity to the rescue! That mare can salvage nearly any social snafu. Rainbow snorted in derision. Dang it Dash, why can’t you just say sorry? Mental facepalm.
Comments ( 105 )
The last time I get in the TARDIS with Derpy and Doctor Whooves. I always get separated and lost in strange worlds. The weird thing is that they're always pure white and filled with text. I was stuck in Chapter 100 of My Second Life for 16 hours before Doctor Whooves found me. This time I got stuck in here for 2 days! I really should hang out with Dash some more. ![]()
:D
PINKIE HUGS!!!![]()
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By the way, It's PonyStep... (To me at least, but in the iTunes it's listed under Electrotic. (C wat I did dar?))
This is great. I have no complaints, suggestions, or comments of any kind other than keep it up!
Another great read, except the "Ur" in the title kind of turns me off to it :/
Still, great job!
You sir are amazing. Take all my stars, it was worth it. *sniff* I want a Pinkie hug.
if i was in issacs place when they were staring when you were hugging pinkie i wouldve been like "its impolite to stare.........."
zOmg Ino I can haz be Editor/Prereader/Guy who gets to read about ponies before other people/ too?![]()
I think I would actually prefer a Derpy hug ![]()
though Rainbow Dash is still the best pony ![]()
i can picture that moment
*hugs pinkie pie*
That is all, keep up the epic work my good sir.
A spartan and rainbow dash in the same room? Oh god. I can imagine them becoming friends later on.
still a great story, not much seemed to happen in thsi chapter, looking forward to more.
id still like to see more... reaction from the older characters to modern tech, that is not something that would be taken lightly
Awesome thus far....
I'm wondering how they're going to explain real-world Equestria being in a fictional children's show.
Lauren Faust, interdimensional traveler?
And talk about double culture shock. First in an entirely different world, then finding out "your" world is centuries gone....
Well, I had Isaac vaguely address his foreknowledge of Equestria by calling it a "land of legend" or something along those lines. It sounds better than saying, "oh, you're a secondary character from a television show made for small female children that I watch despite not being in it's targeted demographic!"
As for the WHY it exists the way it does....
you'll just have to wait to find out.
Hugs for everypony! Wait scratch that, no hugs is just as much of a celebration if you don't like hugs. True?
~YAYZ!~ Update! 8D Thanks a lot! Now I don't have to study for my History exam tomorrow!
am i the only one who doesnt really want to hug pinkie pie?
i mean, if i had the chance, i would, but id much rather hug scootaloo, or fluttershy, or sweetie belle, or applejack. idk, for whatever reason, my brain tells me that pinkie pie smells like an earth (as in, our world) pony. and that for some reason, smelling her would result in tasting her. and thats just gross. my brain sucks at life!!! ![]()
ah well, nice chapter ![]()
His first act among the ponies is to hug Pinkie. Isaac's freaking me out ![]()
One other thing. Isaac should show Alkaios the Sparta remix on YouTube. That would be hilarious.
I want to hug Pinkie Pie... Right after I hug Fluttershy (Who we all know is Best Pony <Even if SOME Bronies don't want to admit it.>) who I really really want to hug. Pinkie Pie, PLEASE: 1. Break the fourth wall to come out of my computer screen.
2. Bring Fluttershy with you. (Or bring me through my computer screen and into Equestria where I can meet Fluttershy, you, and many other awsome ponies. Did I mention that you are Second Best Pony Pinkie? You're DEFINITELY Best Party Thrower and the Pony who would be the most fun to be with at a party.)
3. GROUP HUG!!!!!
Awesome author continues to write Epic story. AliCentaur Br0ny wants MOAR! Um. Please? I mean, if it's O.K. with you.
This is currently my favorite fic in the watch list. You, sir, deserve a medal!
At first i was like ![]()
Then I was
DO NOT SHOW THEM METALLICA they'd give YOU a few extra ventalation holes.
i was laughing most of the time, incredibly funny.
I would want to hug everypony! Yes I mean EVERYPONY! Although I would be happy with just a hug from Pinkie Pie. One hug is better then none.....
Damnit, this Isaac fool is living the dream... I suppose if I were there I would ask to hug Pinkie Pie too. Only because I don't think Rainbow Dash would go for hugs quite so much, but that's what I would want. Sweet Celestia, do I want to hug Rainbow Dash. ![]()
Oh wait, is your name Isaac Noe to begin with, Inoeitall, is this you in Equestria? I mean, your name kind of suggests, but still. I think I missed the memo. Derp! ![]()
I love how this is exactly how we would all react if we met the Mane 6. We'd all be grinning like idiots holding barely contained glee. Then we'd immediately want to touch one of them, don't say you wouldn't. You know you would. And that's not supposed to sound dirty, even though it did. And then it would be sort of awkward, because we're buckin' humans for crying out loud. ![]()
I'd strangle my dog for a chance to hug Pinkie.
Please write a lot more stories!!! ![]()
Twilight was the first to regain her composure. “Umm... if I might interrupt your hugging session, perhaps you could explain a few things for us.”
shhh, hugging Pinkie Pie right now, the rest of you get in line
Twilight seemed annoyed "What did you-"
HUGGING PINKIE PIE YOUR ARGUMENTS ARE INVALID
New update?
Yesh ho my god!
>>darktoes It seem to me like he had the videos downloaded on the laptop already.
great chapter, although it was short for the time it took to upload
. on a side note, should had hugged Luna ![]()
Random question but what are the humans going to eat? Now that cows are sentient and fluttershy cares for the other normal creatures that seems like it will be a problem. Cant see the spartan going vegitarian.![]()
Alkaios how the buck do you pronounce that damn it I hate it when I can't pronounce things
Better not antagonize Rainbow Dash, Alkaios, she's the closest thing this world's ever gonna get to a Spartan.
You gave your story ALOT of potential for greatness with your setup. I believe you have the skills to pull it off, too. I will be awaiting future chapters with anticipation!
Longer Chapters would be.... nice....
oh... and, ARCHLINUX IS BETTER NOOB @ "Ubuntu"
I mean.... if... well.... I can't take that back....
Although I seriously thought you were going to go "HERPDERPHERP WINDOWS LOGIN SCREEN" so that WAS an interesting surprise.
Thanks for the update, I didn't notice spelling mistakes. I guess Isaac doesn't have many slow songs in his iTunes if he thinks playing Metallica is a good idea. Hey, Earth to Isaac, You might want to start with something very slow like a Fleet Foxes song or the "The Velvet Underground & Nico" Album. ![]()
This is brilliant. All the human in equestria stories I've read are real serious.
But THIS... words do not describe, so I shall I attempt to repeat some of the sounds I made whilst reading...
*Ahem*
"...GAAHAHAHAHAPFFFFFTTPJSJPJAOERIOHERNIAOWOWHAHAHA... HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGSSSSYEEEYEYEYEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH..." That part radiated with over-exposed amounts of DAAWWWWWW
My face couldn't form a larger smile.
At first I was like: ![]()
And then I was like: ![]()
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and then I was like:
when I realized I needed to record this (from Ubuntu)
Fluttershy doesn't do hugs.
She will destroy them once she finds out they eat meat!
So cute though. ![]()
Why awkward?
I would hug Fluttershy until she stopped being shy. (Thus : never stop the hugs!)
I would probably go absolutely crazy with Pinkie and corrupt some innocent ponies into doing some unsavoury things, because I'm a bad influence like that.
I would also be craving steak after a few days of pure veggies, plus I don't eat dandelions. Sorry! ![]()
Actually, if anypony would be understanding about eating meat, it would be Fluttershy.
She has to feed several of her animals fish and worms, so she is familiar with omnivores and such. She'd also be the closest acquainted with death. Unless tiny woodland creatures live forever in Equestria, she has probably seen many of them die before. It's just part of life.
I would have passed out if I were in the precense of the main six,
or bump fists with Spike.![]()
FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC.
Reading FanFics got a little stale for me the past week. Just thought I'd let you know, that this has sparked my interest in reading once again.
PinkiePieGasp.mp3, RainbowDashImAnEgghead.mp3
Anyhoo, keep 'em coming. This is probably the best fanfic I've read in a very, VERY, long time.
Pinkie Pie hugging people. Or vice versa. Either way, that just gave me shivers
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It's been such a long time since I've read a decent HiE, dangit. I guess that's what makes this special!!
I do have one thing to comment on, though.... there's WiFi in Equestria? I mean, Isaac was using Google... right? ![]()
THE CHAPTERS
MAKE THEM LONGER, YOU BASTARD, THEY END TOO FAST
On a different note, the Spartan will be fucking hilarious. If you had included a bloody viking in the team as well my ancestors would be roaring in joy, but, well. A man can't have everything. ^^
Pony dub trot? AWESOME.
Hugging pinkie pie? YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD NOW IM SAD.
CHAPTERS. I NEED MOAR OF THEM.
There better be one in an hour. Or I will unleash ZALGO PINKIE PIE.
Hug that, Isaac.
"A few moments later, the Ubuntu log in screen popped up" - AWW YEAH, UBUNTU! MY FAVORITE OPERATING SYSTEM ![]()
"I have two operating systems (OS’s) on my laptop: Windows 7 and Ubuntu" - Same for me
(I never use Windows though)
Woodentoaster does not do dubstep. Beyond her garded is not dubstep.
Anyway, this is really good and I shall read more!![]()
My god i love it love it looooooooooooovvvvvvvvvveeeeeeeeeee it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Rainbow had all the tact of a enraged rhino in a china shop.







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